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(Ambient electronic music playing)
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(Chuckles)
4
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You lucky, lucky people.
5
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Yeah, you.
6
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Yes, you.
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(Chuckles)
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Fuckin' away.
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Aren't you? Fuckin' away.
10
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Like you're late for evolution
or something. Mmm?
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00:00:51,500 --> 00:00:54,208
Yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah.
Everyone's at it. I know.
12
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Everybody's at it except me.
13
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The prince of paranoia. Yeah.
14
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You see, at the moment, I am dealing
with a monumental case of Mr Floppy.
15
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And it's killing me.
16
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Softly. Yeah. Funny, isn't it?
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(Jip) Well, that's me, I'm afraid.
Stressed to the max.
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A legend in my own ego.
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But if you think I'm fucked up,
you should check out my friends.
20
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I can't stop thinking about
my girlfriend fucking other men.
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It's doing my nut in.
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Every bloke she looks at
I think she fancies.
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Even the thought of her having sex
with her past boyfriends is getting to me.
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Whether they turned her on more
or whether their dick was bigger.
25
00:01:39,792 --> 00:01:41,917
It makes me feel inadequate.
Do you know what I mean?
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(Jip) Koop is the best of best mates.
27
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He's an absolute craftsman, man.
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We're gonna know each other
for the rest of our lives.
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We're both as fucked up
as each other.
30
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You know, I love his sincerity.
He's the coolest person I know.
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All right? I'm having a sub-life crisis.
32
00:02:00,833 --> 00:02:04,333
I feel like a character on EastEnders,
the come-down version.
33
00:02:06,042 --> 00:02:08,625
What the fuck am I doing
in this job?
34
00:02:09,625 --> 00:02:13,125
I wanna go to college,
but I fucked up the interview.
35
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When they asked me
why philosophy interested me,
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why didn't I say something like,
37
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"Philosophy is about
the meaning of life",
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instead of, "I've been having
serious trouble trying to work life out,
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and I'm now prepared to listen
to other people's theories."
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(Jip) Now, Nina is Koop's girlfriend.
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I've seen her
around the clubs for years.
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A complete hedonist,
but totally down to earth.
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No edge to her at all.
44
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I trust her with my best mate.
45
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Nina's the most together out of all of us.
46
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She's an absolute mistress.
47
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Why would I want a man?
48
00:02:46,750 --> 00:02:50,917
They're all emotionally retarded,
egotistical pricks who fuck with your head.
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00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:54,083
They try to control you and make you
feel like the Whore of Babylon
50
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if you wear a miniskirt.
51
00:02:55,625 --> 00:02:58,750
I'm an independent girl
who wears lipstick because she wants to,
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not because men find it more attractive.
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I'm fine being single. I am.
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Peachy fucking creamy.
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(Jip) This is Lulu.
She's a full-on club minx.
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00:03:08,583 --> 00:03:11,917
Major head banger.
We've known each other for years.
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Some people find her a bit intimidating.
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It's purely social camouflage.
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Recently we became dropping partners,
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and that has helped me
to get to know the real Lulu.
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She's a pussycat.
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See, me, I'm quicker on the draw
than Jesse James, my son.
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Eh? Eh? (Chuckles)
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I'm sending smoke signals Tonto style.
You know what I mean?
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I wouldn't say no to a girlfriend.
66
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How nice it would be to drink the
white wine from the furry cup, you know?
67
00:03:42,125 --> 00:03:46,250
I just can't be arsed with the hassle part
of the dating game. Do you know what I mean?
68
00:03:46,333 --> 00:03:49,583
Having a relationship just ain't
top of the pops at the moment, you know?
69
00:03:49,667 --> 00:03:51,458
I'm having sex with music, mate.
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00:03:51,542 --> 00:03:53,583
And believe me, I can go all night.
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00:03:53,667 --> 00:03:56,125
(Jip) I met Moff
in a warehouse party last summer.
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We've been mates ever since.
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00:03:58,042 --> 00:04:01,500
He got moved down here when his dad
got promoted to superintendent.
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00:04:01,583 --> 00:04:03,792
Now, Moff is the biggest
pill monster I know.
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00:04:03,875 --> 00:04:05,750
I love him, but he's off his tits.
76
00:04:05,833 --> 00:04:08,333
I swear on my mother's life,
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I'm having the best time
being off my pickle
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and feeling the music.
79
00:04:16,042 --> 00:04:19,500
You... You...
You know what I mean, yeah?
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00:04:19,583 --> 00:04:22,167
Cushty. I knew
you wouldn't let me down. I knew it.
81
00:04:22,250 --> 00:04:25,708
(♪ Fatboy Slim: "Build
It Up, Tear It Down")
82
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♪ Bounce, bounce,
bounce, bounce, bounce
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♪ Bounce, bounce,
bounce, bounce, bounce
84
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♪ Bounce, bounce,
bounce, bounce, b-b-b...
85
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♪ Build it up
86
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♪ Tear it down
87
00:04:54,583 --> 00:04:56,417
♪ Build it up
88
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♪ Tear it down
89
00:05:02,500 --> 00:05:06,000
♪ Bounce, bounce,
bounce, bounce, bounce
90
00:05:06,083 --> 00:05:10,458
♪ Bounce, bounce,
bounce, bounce, bounce
91
00:05:10,542 --> 00:05:15,417
♪ Bounce, bounce, bounce,
bounce, bounce, bounce
92
00:05:42,333 --> 00:05:46,250
♪ Bounce, bounce,
bounce, bounce, bounce
93
00:05:46,333 --> 00:05:50,583
♪ Bounce, bounce,
bounce, bounce, bounce
94
00:05:50,667 --> 00:05:54,583
♪ Bounce, bounce,
bounce, bounce, bounce
95
00:05:54,667 --> 00:05:59,625
♪ Bounce, bounce, bounce,
bounce, bounce, b-b-b...
96
00:05:59,708 --> 00:06:01,083
♪ Build it up
97
00:06:02,708 --> 00:06:04,333
♪ Tear it down
98
00:06:06,208 --> 00:06:07,667
♪ Build it up
99
00:06:09,125 --> 00:06:10,917
♪ Tear it down
100
00:06:13,792 --> 00:06:17,083
♪ Bounce, bounce, bounce, bounce
101
00:06:17,167 --> 00:06:20,250
♪ Bounce, bounce,
bounce, bounce ♪
102
00:06:23,333 --> 00:06:25,667
{\an8}(Music fades out)
103
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{\an8}(Jip) God's having a laugh, man.
104
00:06:30,917 --> 00:06:33,750
{\an8}He keeps digging up
these social fossils from my past,
105
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{\an8}disguising them as
paying customers for me to deal with.
106
00:06:36,833 --> 00:06:38,958
Maybe it's to remind me
that memory's overrated.
107
00:06:39,042 --> 00:06:42,875
- (Giggling) Don't!
- Oh, my God. It's Karen Benson.
108
00:06:42,958 --> 00:06:45,250
I don't believe this.
I failed the physical with her.
109
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Oh, please, just go away.
110
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Fuck. She's coming over.
111
00:06:50,083 --> 00:06:51,958
Oh, fuck. I'm starting to shake.
112
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Whoa, whoa, whoa. Be cool, Jip.
Nothing happened, remember?
113
00:06:55,250 --> 00:06:56,958
Come on, act like an adult
and be false.
114
00:06:57,042 --> 00:06:58,167
Oh, my God.
115
00:06:58,250 --> 00:06:59,792
Oh, my God. Here it comes.
116
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Here comes the pain.
117
00:07:01,125 --> 00:07:03,125
Hold tight. Oh, my God!
118
00:07:03,208 --> 00:07:04,792
- All right?
- All right?
119
00:07:10,083 --> 00:07:11,458
Why didn't you want sex with me?
120
00:07:11,542 --> 00:07:15,042
I did. I...
I did want sex with you.
121
00:07:15,125 --> 00:07:17,250
So, what was the problem?
122
00:07:17,333 --> 00:07:19,458
I was just terrified
of losing my erection.
123
00:07:19,542 --> 00:07:22,750
- He couldn't get it up for the birds!
- The birds!
124
00:07:22,833 --> 00:07:25,542
- He couldn't get it up for the birds!
- The birds!
125
00:07:25,625 --> 00:07:28,917
He must be a fucking queer!
126
00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:32,833
He couldn't get it up for the birds!
The birds!
127
00:07:33,542 --> 00:07:35,208
I'm not gay
or anything. I...
128
00:07:35,292 --> 00:07:37,250
I'm just having
a bit of a head fuck.
129
00:07:37,333 --> 00:07:38,917
So why didn't you say so?
130
00:07:40,208 --> 00:07:41,750
I was a bit embarrassed.
131
00:07:42,792 --> 00:07:44,750
Thanks. Bye.
132
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See ya.
133
00:07:53,333 --> 00:07:55,708
- It was an accident.
- Some fucking accident.
134
00:07:55,792 --> 00:07:57,417
So you're just gonna
throw it all away?
135
00:07:57,500 --> 00:08:00,208
You threw it away when you had
your little accident with Yvonne.
136
00:08:00,292 --> 00:08:02,958
- Fuck Yvonne.
- No, fuck you!
137
00:08:03,667 --> 00:08:05,875
You can't just take the piss
out of people
138
00:08:05,958 --> 00:08:08,458
and then come back and expect it
to be Terry and fucking June.
139
00:08:08,542 --> 00:08:11,250
- Come on. I'm sorry.
- (Sighs)
140
00:08:11,333 --> 00:08:13,875
Write a song, Tyler. I don't care.
141
00:08:14,500 --> 00:08:17,250
Good luck with your life,
cos you're gonna fucking need it.
142
00:08:17,333 --> 00:08:19,542
This is the third guy
who's fucked me over in a row.
143
00:08:19,625 --> 00:08:22,708
It's not you, Lu.
You're just a fucking arsehole magnet.
144
00:08:22,792 --> 00:08:25,750
(Jip) Now, Lulu didn't enrol
for a degree in social masturbation,
145
00:08:25,833 --> 00:08:27,292
but she's getting one anyway.
146
00:08:27,375 --> 00:08:29,833
Matt and Luke
are post-Goa-modernists.
147
00:08:29,917 --> 00:08:33,667
They live in the canteen, armed only
with their Golden Virginia and Blue Rizlas,
148
00:08:33,750 --> 00:08:36,417
yacking endlessly
about their psychedelic clichés
149
00:08:36,500 --> 00:08:39,042
and how being Black
is a state of mind, yeah?
150
00:08:39,125 --> 00:08:41,292
Oh, and they just got back
from Amsterdam.
151
00:08:41,375 --> 00:08:43,750
Designer-poor
and white-boy-dread posse.
152
00:08:44,417 --> 00:08:46,542
- Fucking space invaders.
- Mmm.
153
00:08:47,542 --> 00:08:49,417
- How's it going?
- (Lulu) Downhill.
154
00:08:49,500 --> 00:08:50,500
All right, cool.
155
00:08:51,292 --> 00:08:52,750
So, how was your trip?
156
00:08:52,833 --> 00:08:55,625
Ah, well, the theory of the 'Dam is,
yeah, life's for living.
157
00:08:55,708 --> 00:08:59,667
So just sit down, skin up, be blot.
We chilled out in the red-light district.
158
00:09:00,375 --> 00:09:03,042
Everyone's blazing away,
smoking trees of weed.
159
00:09:03,125 --> 00:09:05,125
Word to the mummyfucker.
160
00:09:05,208 --> 00:09:07,708
(Luke) Our last night there,
we were sharing the skunk,
161
00:09:07,792 --> 00:09:09,625
chillin' with
these two massive Rastas.
162
00:09:09,708 --> 00:09:12,750
Nobody said a word. We just sat there
for three hours going up in smoke.
163
00:09:14,167 --> 00:09:17,667
Nodding our heads to the dub reggae
that warmed the place.
164
00:09:17,750 --> 00:09:19,667
The base line was so deep...
165
00:09:19,750 --> 00:09:22,542
you could feel the vibrations in Jamaica.
166
00:09:26,250 --> 00:09:29,833
- Yo, what's up?
- Hey. Nice, nice.
167
00:09:29,917 --> 00:09:31,792
- Any new hip-hop, man?
- Yeah.
168
00:09:31,875 --> 00:09:36,000
Eh, I got some smoking West Coast flow
just landed. Raw as botulism, mate.
169
00:09:36,083 --> 00:09:37,958
No, fuck that West Coast shit, man.
170
00:09:38,042 --> 00:09:40,833
I want some hardcore East Coast
flavour beat. You know what I mean?
171
00:09:40,917 --> 00:09:42,167
Well, why didn't you say so?
172
00:09:42,250 --> 00:09:45,458
Fat beats. Armageddon on the streets.
We're inundated with the shit, brah.
173
00:09:45,542 --> 00:09:48,083
Eh, if we had any more hardcore,
we'd get arrested.
174
00:09:48,167 --> 00:09:49,583
Yeah, a'right.
175
00:09:50,417 --> 00:09:53,708
(Jip) Now, Koop's on the pulse,
but he's a serious vinyl pusher.
176
00:09:53,792 --> 00:09:55,833
Blagging friendship,
getting the kids hooked,
177
00:09:55,917 --> 00:09:57,625
hustling with style.
178
00:09:57,708 --> 00:10:02,000
This was recorded by a posse
of crackheads on death row, right?
179
00:10:02,083 --> 00:10:05,833
So all them little interludes of
prison noises and that, they're for real.
180
00:10:05,917 --> 00:10:08,167
They call themselves
the Itchy Trigger Finger Niggas.
181
00:10:08,250 --> 00:10:11,125
- The itchy what?
- The Itchy Trigger Finger Niggas.
182
00:10:11,208 --> 00:10:13,667
♪ Success with falling in New York
is amazing
183
00:10:13,750 --> 00:10:16,125
♪ Nine Glock cocked
Fuck cops, my block
184
00:10:16,208 --> 00:10:18,917
♪ Execute, rip 'n' tear,
prepare electric chair
185
00:10:19,000 --> 00:10:21,708
♪ For the villainous,
halfway crooked crimes are silliness
186
00:10:21,792 --> 00:10:24,625
♪ The barrenous with the venomous,
tantrums so scandalous
187
00:10:24,708 --> 00:10:26,917
♪ Motherfuckers can't handle,
knock 'em like Rambo
188
00:10:27,000 --> 00:10:29,833
- ♪ Still caged, with strength to go head-up...
- Yeah!
189
00:10:29,917 --> 00:10:32,583
♪ In despair as I'm sittin' in this chair
'bout to die
190
00:10:32,667 --> 00:10:35,250
♪ In jail a long time, no lie, can't cry
191
00:10:35,333 --> 00:10:37,875
♪ A lot of things are runnin'
through my mind, mostly crime
192
00:10:37,958 --> 00:10:41,000
♪ My last request be one more chance
to say my rhyme ♪
193
00:10:41,083 --> 00:10:43,167
I'll take that shit, man.
That shit is real.
194
00:10:43,250 --> 00:10:46,167
Yeah, yeah, yeah, man.
Eh, can't be missed. Twenty quid.
195
00:10:46,250 --> 00:10:48,167
- Twenty quid?
- Yeah, man.
196
00:10:48,250 --> 00:10:50,667
Eh, you know like
when the price of artists' work
197
00:10:50,750 --> 00:10:52,125
goes up when they die, yeah?
198
00:10:52,208 --> 00:10:55,000
The price of hip-hop albums go up
when the gangsters get locked down.
199
00:10:55,083 --> 00:10:57,417
When they get the chair,
the price'll go into orbit, mate.
200
00:10:57,500 --> 00:11:00,833
- Is it?
- Look, it's going to be banned.
201
00:11:00,917 --> 00:11:04,042
So I'd nab it now before some other
hip-hop junkie does. You know what I mean?
202
00:11:04,125 --> 00:11:06,167
- Yeah, all right.
- All right, nice.
203
00:11:06,250 --> 00:11:08,333
Nice one, B. Yeah, safe.
204
00:11:08,417 --> 00:11:09,417
All right.
205
00:11:14,292 --> 00:11:15,583
Any new jungle in, guy?
206
00:11:15,667 --> 00:11:17,167
I got the Tarzan and Jane of jungle
207
00:11:17,250 --> 00:11:19,708
just swung in on the vine
this morning, mate.
208
00:11:20,958 --> 00:11:24,917
I'm telling you, this could turn
Hare Krishna into a bad boy.
209
00:11:27,542 --> 00:11:31,000
(♪Aphrodite: "Stalker")
210
00:11:31,875 --> 00:11:36,458
♪ Mmm! Jungle is massive in any place!
Make a disgrace!
211
00:11:36,542 --> 00:11:38,875
♪ Nigga! Easy, man! Easy!
212
00:11:38,958 --> 00:11:42,042
- ♪ Bounce to the beat. Oh! Oh!
- ♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah!
213
00:11:42,125 --> 00:11:44,542
♪ Cardiff massive! Cardiff massive!
214
00:11:48,375 --> 00:11:50,333
♪ Run time, run time, yeah
215
00:11:53,167 --> 00:11:54,875
♪ Ai! Ai! Ai!
216
00:11:54,958 --> 00:11:57,167
♪ Bounce to the beat!
Bounce, bounce to the beat!
217
00:11:57,250 --> 00:11:59,333
♪ Brutal! In the air, yeah ♪
218
00:12:02,708 --> 00:12:03,833
Fucking hell.
219
00:12:04,833 --> 00:12:06,250
I fucking hate this job, man.
220
00:12:07,333 --> 00:12:09,250
(Sighs) Fuck.
221
00:12:10,042 --> 00:12:12,542
We spend nine hours a day,
five days a week,
222
00:12:12,625 --> 00:12:16,833
incarcerated in this wanky fucking store,
223
00:12:16,917 --> 00:12:19,250
having to act like C-3PO
224
00:12:19,333 --> 00:12:21,667
to any twat that wants
to condescend to us.
225
00:12:21,750 --> 00:12:24,750
Do you know what I mean?
We have to brown-nose the customers.
226
00:12:24,833 --> 00:12:27,667
Then we get abused
by some mini fucking Hitler
227
00:12:27,750 --> 00:12:29,750
who just gives us stick all day.
228
00:12:30,750 --> 00:12:34,000
What the hell
do you think you're doing
229
00:12:34,083 --> 00:12:36,792
just standing around and talking?
230
00:12:36,875 --> 00:12:42,167
If you wanna work in this firm,
then wake up and get real.
231
00:12:42,250 --> 00:12:45,333
Now, tidy up the T-shirts,
stack the jeans,
232
00:12:45,417 --> 00:12:48,042
and put them
in colour-coordinated piles.
233
00:12:48,125 --> 00:12:51,417
Take this as your final warning!
234
00:12:51,500 --> 00:12:55,458
- (Grunting)
- (Till dinging)
235
00:13:00,250 --> 00:13:02,708
(Jip) I take the corporate
cock shafting like the next person
236
00:13:02,792 --> 00:13:05,042
because I need to pay the rent.
237
00:13:05,125 --> 00:13:08,042
But if you ask me, the Antichrist
has been with us for a long time,
238
00:13:08,125 --> 00:13:11,500
and he means business,
big business.
239
00:13:11,583 --> 00:13:14,583
(Mechanical clicking and whirring)
240
00:13:30,292 --> 00:13:33,625
(Mechanical clicking and whirring
continues)
241
00:13:41,417 --> 00:13:43,542
- All right, Nin?
- Yep.
242
00:13:44,083 --> 00:13:47,167
(Jip) Martin is a closet human.
He desperately wants to get into Nina.
243
00:13:47,250 --> 00:13:48,625
He slides around the shop floor
244
00:13:48,708 --> 00:13:51,542
fuelled by the bad sperm
that pours from every orifice.
245
00:13:52,750 --> 00:13:56,208
- You looking after my meat?
- Oh, that was funny.
246
00:13:56,292 --> 00:13:59,667
- Well, I'm a funny guy.
- Yeah, you should have your own series.
247
00:13:59,750 --> 00:14:03,583
- Come on, Nin, loosen up. I don't bite.
- You sure?
248
00:14:06,375 --> 00:14:07,917
Only if you want me to.
249
00:14:12,125 --> 00:14:13,250
Fuck this!
250
00:14:29,958 --> 00:14:31,458
(Jip) Like most weekenders I know,
251
00:14:31,542 --> 00:14:34,375
if you wanna play in the party,
you have to raise the capital.
252
00:14:34,458 --> 00:14:36,875
But if you're religious about not working,
you deal.
253
00:14:36,958 --> 00:14:38,375
You deal to your friends.
254
00:14:38,458 --> 00:14:40,625
Now, Moffis not a pusher.
He's not violent.
255
00:14:40,708 --> 00:14:42,750
He's never been
in any scenes from Scarface.
256
00:14:42,833 --> 00:14:45,375
He just sorts people out
with party prescriptions.
257
00:14:46,208 --> 00:14:49,542
They're happy. Moff gets a free night.
It's not big business.
258
00:14:50,875 --> 00:14:52,833
Next stop, Trixi.
259
00:14:52,917 --> 00:14:56,333
- Trixi?
- Hey! Moff!
260
00:14:56,625 --> 00:14:58,292
(Trixi laughs)
261
00:14:58,375 --> 00:15:02,750
- Hard day at the office, Trix, or what?
- Oh! I've been working my tits off.
262
00:15:02,833 --> 00:15:03,833
I can see that.
263
00:15:04,625 --> 00:15:07,625
What's cooking, Moffer the bon temps-y?
264
00:15:07,708 --> 00:15:09,792
Not much, mate. Life in the bus lane.
265
00:15:09,875 --> 00:15:11,250
Do you, uh...
266
00:15:12,292 --> 00:15:14,417
- Do you want any hashish or what?
- What is it?
267
00:15:14,500 --> 00:15:16,333
- Bit of Cilla.
- Cilla Black, is it?
268
00:15:16,417 --> 00:15:20,167
- Right, what do you want?
- I'll take your finest-looking Henry.
269
00:15:21,417 --> 00:15:23,583
Something's going on here.
I'm fucking psychic, me.
270
00:15:23,667 --> 00:15:24,708
Do you know why?
271
00:15:24,792 --> 00:15:26,875
There's an eighth there for the mistress.
272
00:15:26,958 --> 00:15:28,000
(Laughs)
273
00:15:46,000 --> 00:15:48,875
You fucking winding me up or what?
Fucking hell. This is a tenner.
274
00:15:48,958 --> 00:15:50,917
- (Laughs)
- A fuckin' tenner?
275
00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:53,500
Fuckin' hell, Trix.
276
00:15:55,000 --> 00:15:56,833
Fuck. You surprise me.
277
00:15:57,625 --> 00:15:58,625
Fuck me.
278
00:15:59,625 --> 00:16:02,792
Can I interest you
in any Billy, my Lord?
279
00:16:03,500 --> 00:16:06,417
You really know how to make a man
go moist. You know that?
280
00:16:06,500 --> 00:16:07,583
(Trixi laughs)
281
00:16:07,667 --> 00:16:09,833
(On radio)
♪ Cruisin' down the boulevard
282
00:16:09,917 --> 00:16:12,125
♪ I'm treated like some superstar
283
00:16:12,208 --> 00:16:13,958
♪ You know the time,
so don't look hard
284
00:16:14,042 --> 00:16:16,583
♪ Get with it,
the ultimate homeboy car
285
00:16:16,667 --> 00:16:18,833
♪ All you suckers in the other ride
286
00:16:18,917 --> 00:16:21,458
♪ Wherever I'm comin',
get to my side
287
00:16:21,542 --> 00:16:23,333
♪ My '98 is tough to chase
288
00:16:23,417 --> 00:16:26,208
♪ If you're on my tail,
better watch your face
289
00:16:26,292 --> 00:16:28,250
♪ You gonna get yours,
suckers to the side
290
00:16:28,333 --> 00:16:30,708
♪ I know you hate my '98
291
00:16:30,792 --> 00:16:31,833
♪ You gonna get your ♪
292
00:16:31,917 --> 00:16:33,333
(Music stops abruptly)
293
00:16:33,417 --> 00:16:36,167
(Jip) I'm supposed to see my mum
tomorrow, but I'm droppin' tonight,
294
00:16:36,250 --> 00:16:38,417
so there is no way
I can deal with heron a comedown.
295
00:16:38,500 --> 00:16:39,875
I'm in and out, five minutes.
296
00:16:40,667 --> 00:16:42,333
Mum! It's me!
297
00:16:43,583 --> 00:16:45,958
(Jip) I never knew my mum
until I was 15.
298
00:16:46,042 --> 00:16:49,708
I was moved down here by the social
when my father was locked up for fraud.
299
00:16:49,792 --> 00:16:51,750
Well, he was more like my friend
than a father,
300
00:16:51,833 --> 00:16:54,833
taking me out on the circuit,
bringing me up his way, you know?
301
00:16:54,917 --> 00:16:56,958
In Cardiff, my mother
had always worked from home,
302
00:16:57,042 --> 00:16:59,458
which I always just accepted
when we lived together,
303
00:16:59,542 --> 00:17:03,625
but now when I go and see her,
it kills me to see how she gets used, man.
304
00:17:03,708 --> 00:17:05,625
It's been routine for her
since she was my age,
305
00:17:05,708 --> 00:17:08,125
so she's got no hang-ups about it,
which is cool.
306
00:17:08,208 --> 00:17:12,042
And I know it's not her fault.
But I can't handle staying there long.
307
00:17:12,125 --> 00:17:13,750
Especially if she's with a punter.
308
00:17:13,833 --> 00:17:15,958
- Hiya, love.
- Hi, Mum. You all right?
309
00:17:16,042 --> 00:17:17,292
Yeah. Aw.
310
00:17:18,625 --> 00:17:21,792
Aw, it's a nice surprise.
I didn't expect to see you today.
311
00:17:21,875 --> 00:17:25,250
No, it's a flying visit. Um, listen,
I can't make it tomorrow. I've gotta work.
312
00:17:25,333 --> 00:17:27,792
So I'll pop in Sunday.
Is that all right?
313
00:17:27,875 --> 00:17:30,208
- All right. I'll cook dinner.
- Cool.
314
00:17:31,208 --> 00:17:35,125
I'm with someone upstairs a minute.
He doesn't take long. Five minutes, OK?
315
00:17:35,208 --> 00:17:38,000
Um, I've gotta move, Mum.
I've gotta go.
316
00:17:38,083 --> 00:17:41,750
Oh, just five minutes, love.
I never get to see you any more.
317
00:17:43,417 --> 00:17:45,208
Uh... All... All right.
318
00:17:46,292 --> 00:17:47,958
Some chocolates in the cupboard.
319
00:17:56,292 --> 00:17:58,167
(Jip) Yeah, see you
in five minutes, Mum.
320
00:17:58,250 --> 00:18:00,417
My mum can work through
a lot of men in a day.
321
00:18:00,500 --> 00:18:04,208
Some fall in love with her,
send her chocolates. Some get heavy.
322
00:18:04,292 --> 00:18:06,917
I used to hang around
just in case things got out of hand.
323
00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:08,750
Any trouble, I'd be there, you know?
324
00:18:08,833 --> 00:18:11,708
But I couldn't do it for long.
I had to leave.
325
00:18:11,792 --> 00:18:14,000
Sometimes I've gotta stop myself
from running upstairs
326
00:18:14,083 --> 00:18:17,042
and beating the living shit
out of the man who's there with my mum,
327
00:18:17,125 --> 00:18:18,500
but I never do.
328
00:18:18,583 --> 00:18:22,708
Right, this is the score. Twenty quid
for a blowjob, fifty quid to fuck her.
329
00:18:22,792 --> 00:18:25,553
Mind you, she'll do anything you like,
as long as you've got the cash.
330
00:18:25,625 --> 00:18:27,292
She's got all the gear, you know,
331
00:18:27,375 --> 00:18:31,042
suzzies, open-crotch panties,
peephole bra.
332
00:18:31,125 --> 00:18:34,750
Fit tits, crackin' arse.
And she'll put on a bit of an act.
333
00:18:34,833 --> 00:18:38,333
Well, they call it acting, but she
really enjoys it. Know what I mean?
334
00:18:38,417 --> 00:18:40,792
Fuck off! Shut the fuck up!
335
00:18:46,958 --> 00:18:50,333
(Jip) Koop goes to see his dad
every day after work.
336
00:18:50,417 --> 00:18:53,500
He never got over his last breakdown
when Koop's mum left them.
337
00:18:53,583 --> 00:18:57,083
Since then, he's invented
his own alternative reality.
338
00:18:57,167 --> 00:19:00,875
His world is split into those on his side
and those on the enemy's side,
339
00:19:00,958 --> 00:19:04,583
who he identifies with
through looks and gestures.
340
00:19:04,667 --> 00:19:06,958
His dad sends and receives
messages telepathically
341
00:19:07,042 --> 00:19:08,667
through TV and satellite,
342
00:19:08,750 --> 00:19:11,125
and he's waiting for a sign
that the mission is over
343
00:19:11,208 --> 00:19:12,583
and his life can start again.
344
00:19:14,000 --> 00:19:16,875
- All right, Dad.
- Oh! The cavalry!
345
00:19:16,958 --> 00:19:19,042
- Ah.
- Oh!
346
00:19:21,792 --> 00:19:24,167
So, how long
have I got to stay in here, then?
347
00:19:25,042 --> 00:19:26,417
(Scoffs)
348
00:19:27,583 --> 00:19:28,708
I don't know.
349
00:19:29,667 --> 00:19:33,083
What did our side say?
Tell me the truth, Leon.
350
00:19:33,167 --> 00:19:35,667
Look... I don't know.
351
00:19:36,625 --> 00:19:37,667
It's all right.
352
00:19:38,958 --> 00:19:41,333
I know you both can't talk about it.
353
00:19:41,417 --> 00:19:45,083
It would endanger me, right?
Things could be worse, you know.
354
00:19:45,167 --> 00:19:47,875
It could be you in here
amongst all these fucking headcases.
355
00:19:47,958 --> 00:19:49,833
(Both laugh)
356
00:19:59,167 --> 00:20:02,708
I would like to propose a toast
to the bird
357
00:20:02,792 --> 00:20:05,167
for giving her Mac job the finger,
358
00:20:05,250 --> 00:20:09,042
and for successfully
gaining unemployment.
359
00:20:09,125 --> 00:20:11,042
What a fucking mistress!
360
00:20:11,125 --> 00:20:13,750
- Thank you. Thank you.
- (Photographers clamouring)
361
00:20:15,167 --> 00:20:18,333
Already feels great
to be part of the two million.
362
00:20:18,417 --> 00:20:21,417
I'm looking forward
to sitting on my arse for a bit,
363
00:20:21,500 --> 00:20:22,958
having reversed sleeping patterns
364
00:20:23,042 --> 00:20:26,167
and getting into some hardcore
Richard and Judy.
365
00:20:26,250 --> 00:20:28,125
(Photographers clamouring)
366
00:20:35,833 --> 00:20:37,667
- (Disco music playing)
- (Nina) Go, girl!
367
00:20:37,750 --> 00:20:39,792
Come on, sugar! Show it to me!
368
00:20:43,333 --> 00:20:45,292
Check out the booty.
369
00:20:45,375 --> 00:20:48,542
(Nina) They want you, honey.
They want you, sugar. Come on.
370
00:20:49,583 --> 00:20:51,792
Listen, now! Go, girl!
371
00:20:52,375 --> 00:20:54,875
♪ Cos I was sitting there
bored to death
372
00:20:54,958 --> 00:20:57,417
♪ And in just one breath he said
373
00:20:57,500 --> 00:21:00,458
♪ You gotta get up, you gotta get on,
you gotta get down, girl...
374
00:21:01,583 --> 00:21:02,583
Fuck!
375
00:21:03,208 --> 00:21:05,625
♪ Last night a DJ saved my life ♪
376
00:21:06,167 --> 00:21:08,625
(Jip) Koop dreams of being
the world's top club spinner,
377
00:21:08,708 --> 00:21:11,125
but he reckons it doesn't matter
how well you can beat-mix,
378
00:21:11,208 --> 00:21:13,875
you ain't a DJ
until you can scratch.
379
00:21:16,292 --> 00:21:18,250
♪ Puff, puffin'
Puff, puffin'
380
00:21:18,333 --> 00:21:22,000
♪ Puff, puff, puff, puff, puff
Puffin' da herb
381
00:21:22,083 --> 00:21:24,208
♪ Herb, herb
382
00:21:24,292 --> 00:21:27,458
♪ Herb, huh, huh, huh, huh,
huh, huh, huh, herb
383
00:21:27,542 --> 00:21:30,458
♪ Puffin' da herb
Puffin' da herb
384
00:21:30,542 --> 00:21:32,875
♪ Puffin' da herb
Puffin' da herb
385
00:21:32,958 --> 00:21:34,000
♪ Herb, herb
386
00:21:34,083 --> 00:21:37,458
(Continues scratching)
387
00:21:38,500 --> 00:21:41,750
♪ Herb, puffin' da herb
Puffin' da herb
388
00:21:41,833 --> 00:21:44,292
♪ Puffin' da herb
Puffin' da herb
389
00:21:44,375 --> 00:21:45,583
♪ Herb, herb
390
00:21:45,667 --> 00:21:47,417
(Continues scratching)
391
00:21:49,875 --> 00:21:50,792
♪ Herb...
392
00:21:50,875 --> 00:21:54,292
(Jip) But he can't scratch to save
his life. He just digs the fantasy, man.
393
00:21:54,375 --> 00:21:55,625
Go on, my son!
394
00:21:56,375 --> 00:21:58,917
♪ Puffin' da herb, puffin' da herb
395
00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:02,208
- ♪ Herb, herb ♪
- (Cheering and applause)
396
00:22:06,792 --> 00:22:09,417
(Upbeat pop music
playing softly over speakers)
397
00:22:11,917 --> 00:22:15,083
So, is your brother still going out
with you lot tonight, yeah?
398
00:22:15,167 --> 00:22:17,083
Yeah, under the wing.
399
00:22:17,167 --> 00:22:20,958
- He hasn't dropped before, has he?
- No. Breaking his cherry tonight.
400
00:22:21,042 --> 00:22:22,500
How old is he? 17?
401
00:22:23,625 --> 00:22:26,375
He's gonna do it eventually,
so I reckon he's better off with me
402
00:22:26,458 --> 00:22:28,375
than mixing with the wrong crowd,
you know?
403
00:22:28,458 --> 00:22:31,292
- Just keep an eye on him, though, yeah?
- Mmm.
404
00:22:33,417 --> 00:22:36,667
I'm about to be part
of the chemical generation.
405
00:22:36,750 --> 00:22:40,750
Doves, playboys, biscuits, barrels,
Calis, clear caps, China whites,
406
00:22:40,833 --> 00:22:43,458
rhubarbs, looney tunes, New Yorkers.
407
00:22:43,542 --> 00:22:45,250
Bang on it. Larging it.
408
00:22:45,333 --> 00:22:47,458
The full monty, safe as houses,
pair of trousers,
409
00:22:47,542 --> 00:22:50,292
what a laugh, let's do another half.
410
00:22:50,375 --> 00:22:52,292
(Jip) Now, Lee is Nina's little brother.
411
00:22:52,375 --> 00:22:55,042
None of us know him, but he's gonna
take drugs with us anyway.
412
00:22:55,125 --> 00:22:56,708
His enthusiasm scares me, man.
413
00:22:56,792 --> 00:22:59,917
He reminds me of myself when I was
at the beginning of my ecstasy honeymoon.
414
00:23:00,000 --> 00:23:03,750
Are your legs open,
you filthy little harlot?
415
00:23:03,833 --> 00:23:06,667
- Is that you, Koop?
- Oh, fuck! Shit!
416
00:23:06,750 --> 00:23:09,250
Yeah, sorry, Lu.
Is Nina there, please?
417
00:23:09,333 --> 00:23:10,333
Sorry.
418
00:23:15,958 --> 00:23:19,208
- Hello.
- Are your legs open?
419
00:23:19,292 --> 00:23:21,875
- Of course.
- Then I'll begin.
420
00:23:29,167 --> 00:23:30,417
(Rap music playing)
421
00:23:30,500 --> 00:23:32,708
♪ Girl, I'm gonna tie you up
and wear the mask
422
00:23:32,792 --> 00:23:34,750
♪ With your strap-on cock
fuck me up my ass
423
00:23:34,833 --> 00:23:36,750
♪ Your sexual powers
leave me drained for hours
424
00:23:36,833 --> 00:23:38,875
♪ But I gotta draw the line
at golden showers
425
00:23:38,958 --> 00:23:43,000
♪ And, girl, you got
the sweetest arsehole
426
00:23:43,083 --> 00:23:46,792
♪ It's like a pink,
quivering rabbit's nostril
427
00:23:46,875 --> 00:23:47,917
♪ Peace ♪
428
00:23:48,833 --> 00:23:50,750
(Laughing)
What are you fucking like?
429
00:23:50,833 --> 00:23:54,042
Superb! Thank you, sweetie.
430
00:23:54,125 --> 00:23:57,000
Shit. Have you got
your party head on for tonight?
431
00:23:57,083 --> 00:24:00,542
More so than Wurzel Gummidge
on a kilo of Charlie Chan.
432
00:24:00,625 --> 00:24:02,042
But Lulu's not coming now.
433
00:24:02,125 --> 00:24:04,792
What? Oh, shit. Why not?
434
00:24:04,875 --> 00:24:08,208
She couldn't get a ticket,
and she can't be arsed cos of that twat.
435
00:24:08,292 --> 00:24:12,125
- Jip's not gonna be a happy shopper.
- Oh, fucking hell. Who'd have a ticket?
436
00:24:12,208 --> 00:24:13,750
If I found one,
do you reckon she'd go?
437
00:24:13,833 --> 00:24:17,083
Maybe. If Jip brings her.
438
00:24:17,958 --> 00:24:20,583
Geezer!
439
00:24:20,667 --> 00:24:22,958
Hey! What's happening, man?
440
00:24:23,042 --> 00:24:25,250
How's it going?
Are you sorted or what?
441
00:24:25,333 --> 00:24:27,500
Hey, you're really cool, man.
You're really cool.
442
00:24:27,583 --> 00:24:30,917
Hey, I know we've only just met, mate,
but I think I love you, man.
443
00:24:31,000 --> 00:24:34,625
Hey, show me love,
show me love, show me love!
444
00:24:34,708 --> 00:24:37,125
(Laughs) Safe as fuck,
you are, aren't ya?
445
00:24:37,208 --> 00:24:39,625
I can't fault you, can I, brother?
446
00:24:39,708 --> 00:24:43,500
You're like them fucking rookies
back at Spike Island, man! Whoo-hoo!
447
00:24:43,583 --> 00:24:44,792
- What?
- Listen.
448
00:24:44,875 --> 00:24:47,250
Lulu couldn't get a ticket for tonight.
449
00:24:47,333 --> 00:24:48,333
What?
450
00:24:49,250 --> 00:24:50,792
Shit, man. Really?
451
00:24:50,875 --> 00:24:54,167
- Know anyone that's got a spare one?
- Oh, fuck.
452
00:24:56,250 --> 00:24:59,458
Uh, I think... I think Moff did.
453
00:24:59,542 --> 00:25:01,375
But I'm not sure.
It was a while ago.
454
00:25:02,667 --> 00:25:03,750
Shit, man.
455
00:25:05,333 --> 00:25:07,292
(Jip, narrating)
I've got to get Lu out tonight.
456
00:25:07,375 --> 00:25:10,375
I need to cheer her up, you know?
Get her mind off that twat.
457
00:25:10,458 --> 00:25:13,708
When we hit the club together, we're like
Bonnie and Clyde, man, way out west.
458
00:25:13,792 --> 00:25:15,708
She's the only girl
I've ever felt chilled with
459
00:25:15,792 --> 00:25:17,917
because we've never
fancied each other.
460
00:25:18,000 --> 00:25:19,750
Nothing could ever happen
between us.
461
00:25:19,833 --> 00:25:23,500
I don't have to try and impress her
or worry about embarrassing silences.
462
00:25:23,583 --> 00:25:26,292
I've gotta get her a ticket
and put a smile back on her face.
463
00:25:27,208 --> 00:25:29,750
(Phone rings)
464
00:25:33,125 --> 00:25:34,167
Hello?
465
00:25:34,750 --> 00:25:36,042
Hello!
466
00:25:36,125 --> 00:25:39,667
- Oh, hello.
- Any contact with Tyler, the germ?
467
00:25:39,750 --> 00:25:43,083
Yeah, I gave that prick
the verbal post-mortem this afternoon.
468
00:25:43,167 --> 00:25:46,208
Oh, respect, respect,
to the bird most high.
469
00:25:46,292 --> 00:25:48,083
Listen, I hear
you couldn't get a ticket.
470
00:25:48,167 --> 00:25:50,083
Yeah, well, it's been
a lucky week for me.
471
00:25:50,167 --> 00:25:54,833
Well, I think that your luck
is gonna change, sister,
472
00:25:54,917 --> 00:25:58,792
child of the beat,
because if I just reach down here
473
00:25:58,875 --> 00:26:03,500
and dip into my
"Uncle Santa Jip Will Fix It" magic box,
474
00:26:03,583 --> 00:26:07,208
you will find one freshly cut
and preserved ticket for tonight's Asylum.
475
00:26:07,292 --> 00:26:11,167
- You got one?
- Oh, yes. Oh, yes, I certainly did.
476
00:26:11,250 --> 00:26:14,875
I don't know, Jip.
The batteries are a bit low, you know.
477
00:26:14,958 --> 00:26:17,042
Oh, fuck that shit, Lu. Come on.
478
00:26:17,125 --> 00:26:19,458
Come on. Everyone's going.
479
00:26:19,542 --> 00:26:21,125
Come on, Lu. Me and you, yeah?
480
00:26:21,708 --> 00:26:24,917
Come on, you've gotta come.
Look, listen, Tyler is a prick, right?
481
00:26:25,000 --> 00:26:26,208
He's a prick!
482
00:26:26,292 --> 00:26:29,167
Do not go down with that wanker's boat.
You know I'm saying to ya?
483
00:26:29,250 --> 00:26:32,000
Anyway, town's gonna be full of horny men.
Do you know what I mean?
484
00:26:32,083 --> 00:26:36,708
Fuck it, fuck it. All your best friends
who love you. They love you.
485
00:26:36,792 --> 00:26:38,625
They all want you to be there, yeah?
486
00:26:38,708 --> 00:26:41,000
Come on.
We'll have an absolute fucking blinder.
487
00:26:41,083 --> 00:26:44,083
Me and you. Absolute mayhem.
Come on. We'll take the piss.
488
00:26:44,167 --> 00:26:47,583
Absolute chaos. What are you saying?
Come on. Yeah?
489
00:26:47,667 --> 00:26:50,500
- All right, you got me!
- I wanna hear you say yes!
490
00:26:50,583 --> 00:26:51,750
- Yes!
- Yes?
491
00:26:51,833 --> 00:26:53,125
- Yes!
- Yes!
492
00:26:53,208 --> 00:26:56,042
- Yes!
- Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!
493
00:26:56,125 --> 00:26:57,875
- See you later, babe!
- (Laughs)
494
00:26:58,750 --> 00:26:59,667
Ah!
495
00:26:59,750 --> 00:27:03,208
(imitating Del Boy) He who dares, Rodders.
He who dares, my son.
496
00:27:03,292 --> 00:27:05,333
(Phone rings)
497
00:27:08,250 --> 00:27:11,458
Hold on a minute. Hello?
498
00:27:11,542 --> 00:27:15,083
Eh, eh, eh, eh! How's it going,
you big Cockney space case?
499
00:27:15,167 --> 00:27:16,500
Shut it.
500
00:27:16,583 --> 00:27:19,417
Did you manage to shift that ticket
for tonight's spiritual gathering?
501
00:27:19,500 --> 00:27:23,458
- No, mate. No, not at all. No.
- Oh! Nice one!
502
00:27:23,542 --> 00:27:25,542
- Why? Who needs one? Who, who?
- Lulu.
503
00:27:25,625 --> 00:27:30,083
- Oh, sweet as. Sweet as, mate.
- Cool, cool.
504
00:27:30,167 --> 00:27:32,583
- (Man) Matthew!
- Oh, for fuck's sake.
505
00:27:32,667 --> 00:27:34,958
Catch you later.
Don't go changing to try and please me.
506
00:27:35,042 --> 00:27:37,167
- Nice one, bruv, yeah.
- Oh, nice one, brother.
507
00:27:37,250 --> 00:27:39,292
- Nice one, brother!
- Nice one, brother!
508
00:27:39,375 --> 00:27:41,917
I said nice, bruv!
509
00:27:42,000 --> 00:27:45,083
- Nice one, brother!
- I said nice, bruv!
510
00:27:45,167 --> 00:27:48,417
- Fucking nice one, brother!
- Nice one, bruv...
511
00:27:48,500 --> 00:27:50,583
- Brother!
- Fuck off!
512
00:27:52,792 --> 00:27:53,875
Come on!
513
00:27:53,958 --> 00:27:55,292
(Jip) The weekend has landed.
514
00:27:55,375 --> 00:27:58,667
All that exists now is clubs,
drugs, pubs and parties.
515
00:27:58,750 --> 00:28:00,958
I've got 48 hours
off from the world, man.
516
00:28:01,042 --> 00:28:04,083
I'm gonna blow steam out of my head
like a screaming kettle.
517
00:28:04,167 --> 00:28:06,875
I'm gonna talk cod shit
to strangers all night.
518
00:28:06,958 --> 00:28:08,875
I'm gonna lose the plot
on the dance floor.
519
00:28:08,958 --> 00:28:11,917
The free radicals inside me
are freaking, man.
520
00:28:12,000 --> 00:28:14,750
Tonight I'm Jip Travolta.
I'm Peter Popper.
521
00:28:14,833 --> 00:28:17,542
I'm going to Never Never Land
with my chosen family, man.
522
00:28:17,625 --> 00:28:20,250
We're gonna get more spaced out
than Neil Armstrong ever did.
523
00:28:20,333 --> 00:28:23,542
Anything could happen tonight.
This could be the best night of my life.
524
00:28:23,625 --> 00:28:25,917
- I've got 73 quid in my back burner.
- (Lulu) Yeah?
525
00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:30,250
I'm gonna wax the lot, man.
The Milky Bars are on me! Yeah!
526
00:28:30,333 --> 00:28:33,625
Calling all the crusaders
of the dance floor in green-light mode.
527
00:28:33,708 --> 00:28:35,208
Ah-ha!
528
00:28:35,292 --> 00:28:38,458
Disco queens, club casualties, come on!
529
00:28:38,542 --> 00:28:41,542
Let's join forces! Let's ho of it! Ah!
530
00:28:41,625 --> 00:28:44,000
(Rap music playing)
531
00:28:54,292 --> 00:28:55,958
(Chuckles)
532
00:28:57,083 --> 00:29:00,167
(Jip) But first a daily injection
of the late prophet Bill Hicks,
533
00:29:00,250 --> 00:29:02,792
just to remind me
not to take life too seriously.
534
00:29:02,875 --> 00:29:06,833
(Hicks) It's not a very popular idea.
You don't hear it very often any more.
535
00:29:06,917 --> 00:29:08,667
But it's the truth.
536
00:29:08,750 --> 00:29:12,083
I have taken drugs before, and, uh...
537
00:29:15,125 --> 00:29:17,250
- I had a real good time.
- (Laughter)
538
00:29:19,042 --> 00:29:22,042
Didn't murder anybody, didn't rob anybody,
didn't rape anybody,
539
00:29:22,125 --> 00:29:26,708
didn't beat anybody,
didn't lose, mmm, one fucking job.
540
00:29:26,792 --> 00:29:32,167
Laughed my ass off
and went about my day.
541
00:29:32,250 --> 00:29:35,208
(Applause and cheering)
542
00:29:35,292 --> 00:29:36,417
Sorry.
543
00:29:38,917 --> 00:29:40,625
(Radio DJ) We're off
on weekend manoeuvres
544
00:29:40,708 --> 00:29:44,625
from the world-famous studios, of course,
of Radio 1 here, the Essential Selection.
545
00:29:44,708 --> 00:29:47,708
Those magical elements that make up
the golden thing we call the weekend...
546
00:29:47,792 --> 00:29:50,792
(Laughs)
547
00:29:50,875 --> 00:29:52,667
Who the fuck
do you think you are, you twat?
548
00:29:52,750 --> 00:29:54,958
Why don't you come through
the door like everyone else?
549
00:29:55,042 --> 00:29:56,625
Because I'm not everybody else, fool.
550
00:29:56,708 --> 00:29:59,667
Hey, don't make me fucking prove
my masculinity to you now.
551
00:29:59,750 --> 00:30:02,250
Masculinity, what?
Testosterone's flowing, bro, eh?
552
00:30:02,333 --> 00:30:03,750
Violence is inevitable, mate.
553
00:30:03,833 --> 00:30:06,042
I smells a glassin' in the air,
boys, is it?
554
00:30:06,125 --> 00:30:10,417
- Glassin', is it? Fuck you! Ah!
- Fuck you! Fuck you!
555
00:30:10,500 --> 00:30:13,625
(Both shouting)
556
00:30:13,708 --> 00:30:15,375
I defeat all men!
557
00:30:15,458 --> 00:30:17,708
(Both laugh)
558
00:30:17,792 --> 00:30:20,625
- Come on!
- Come on, come on!
559
00:30:20,708 --> 00:30:22,476
So, what, are you on a mission tonight,
then, or what?
560
00:30:22,500 --> 00:30:24,708
Oh, mate, I'm all revved up,
I'm all revved up.
561
00:30:24,792 --> 00:30:27,875
I'm ready to paint the town
psychedelic colours, everything, man.
562
00:30:27,958 --> 00:30:30,708
Battyman and Robin.
You know what I mean? Let's go apeshit.
563
00:30:30,792 --> 00:30:32,542
- Seriously.
- It's the only way out, mate.
564
00:30:32,625 --> 00:30:35,917
Steroids, ketamine, laughing gas.
Bring 'em all on. You know what I mean?
565
00:30:36,000 --> 00:30:40,375
Tell you what. We'll do a fucking
armed robbery in Boots on the comedown.
566
00:30:40,458 --> 00:30:42,958
- Is it? Is it?
- Is it? Is it?
567
00:30:44,542 --> 00:30:45,583
Come on!
568
00:30:45,667 --> 00:30:48,125
(♪ CG Bolland: "It Ain't Gonna Be Me")
569
00:31:00,542 --> 00:31:04,250
(Indistinct voice over radio)
570
00:31:04,333 --> 00:31:08,125
Hey, mate.
Mate, have you seen Taxi Driver?
571
00:31:09,542 --> 00:31:10,833
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
572
00:31:11,500 --> 00:31:14,333
Hey, mate, can you relate to it,
sort of thing?
573
00:31:14,417 --> 00:31:17,208
- Yeah.
- Yeah? Fuck. Do you understand?
574
00:31:17,292 --> 00:31:19,667
You could be Cardiff's answer
to Travis Bickle,
575
00:31:19,750 --> 00:31:21,500
on a timer waiting to explode.
576
00:31:21,583 --> 00:31:23,958
Can you fucking believe that?
Can you imagine doing that?
577
00:31:24,042 --> 00:31:26,958
Imagine doing a Travis.
I mean, fucking hell.
578
00:31:27,042 --> 00:31:29,750
See, me, I'd have to take
a celebrity with me.
579
00:31:29,833 --> 00:31:33,375
Someone like, um...
What's his name? Uh, ah, uh...
580
00:31:33,458 --> 00:31:36,833
What's his name?
Uh, British pop throb, you know.
581
00:31:36,917 --> 00:31:38,917
Built like a brick shithouse, he is.
582
00:31:39,000 --> 00:31:42,875
Ugly fuck. Peter Andre.
Peter Andre, yeah.
583
00:31:42,958 --> 00:31:44,917
I couldn't just shoot him first,
though, mate.
584
00:31:45,000 --> 00:31:47,083
You're having a laugh, in't you?
Nah. Oh, no.
585
00:31:47,167 --> 00:31:50,125
That'd be like hoofing the cream cake
whole without it touching the sides.
586
00:31:50,208 --> 00:31:52,000
Do you know what I mean?
587
00:31:52,083 --> 00:31:54,792
I believe it would be quite rude
not to torture him first.
588
00:31:54,875 --> 00:31:56,833
Do you know what I mean,
though, mate, do ya?
589
00:31:57,917 --> 00:32:01,667
Thumbscrews instantly spring to mind.
(Chuckles)
590
00:32:01,750 --> 00:32:06,000
You know, followed by an intense session
of electrodes on the testicles.
591
00:32:06,083 --> 00:32:09,333
Yeah, yeah, a fucking, uh,
a wire coat hanger down the Jap's eye.
592
00:32:09,417 --> 00:32:11,792
You know what I mean?
Really fucking hurt the geezer.
593
00:32:11,875 --> 00:32:14,167
And finally
a bullet between the eyes.
594
00:32:14,250 --> 00:32:16,458
And it's time to say hello
to the... to the horned man
595
00:32:16,542 --> 00:32:19,375
you've been working on Earth for
all this time, Pete!
596
00:32:20,167 --> 00:32:23,250
See you later on, Pete!
No one gives a fuck about ya!
597
00:32:23,333 --> 00:32:24,917
(Imitates firing shotgun)
598
00:32:25,000 --> 00:32:27,042
Fucking hell, mate.
599
00:32:27,125 --> 00:32:28,708
(Driver) Right.
600
00:32:28,792 --> 00:32:32,292
Here, here, fucking good film, though,
mate, ain't it, eh? God!
601
00:32:36,208 --> 00:32:38,583
(Dance music playing)
602
00:32:40,958 --> 00:32:43,958
(Laughing and whooping)
603
00:32:48,208 --> 00:32:50,333
(Jip) Friday night's ceremony
is to hook up in a bar
604
00:32:50,417 --> 00:32:52,083
and wind up the weekend.
605
00:32:52,167 --> 00:32:54,375
We've all got to try and get
on the same level together
606
00:32:54,458 --> 00:32:56,333
so we feel like a unit
when we hit the club.
607
00:32:56,417 --> 00:32:58,000
The music we love brought us together,
608
00:32:58,083 --> 00:32:59,750
and so did the music we hate.
609
00:32:59,833 --> 00:33:01,750
- The Spice Girls.
- Boyzone.
610
00:33:01,833 --> 00:33:03,375
- Dannii Minogue.
- Aqua.
611
00:33:03,458 --> 00:33:06,208
- Peter fuckin' Andre.
- The Backstreet Boys.
612
00:33:06,292 --> 00:33:07,750
Uh, 911.
613
00:33:07,833 --> 00:33:08,833
Hanson.
614
00:33:09,417 --> 00:33:12,042
What gets me, right,
is that these talentless wankers
615
00:33:12,125 --> 00:33:14,833
have the opportunity to reach
an international audience, right,
616
00:33:14,917 --> 00:33:16,708
say something profound,
instead of...
617
00:33:16,792 --> 00:33:20,167
♪ Oh, baby, I'm all alone
on the phone
618
00:33:20,250 --> 00:33:22,667
♪ I'm 14 years old
with a broken heart ♪
619
00:33:22,750 --> 00:33:25,292
Fucking cheese-on-toast bollocks.
620
00:33:25,375 --> 00:33:27,583
Fucking embarrassing, mate, innit?
621
00:33:27,667 --> 00:33:31,625
Embarrassing to watch
the little fucking hussy fucker.
622
00:33:46,792 --> 00:33:50,000
(Jip) She's funny, she's cool,
she's gorgeous.
623
00:33:50,792 --> 00:33:52,833
Oh, shit, I fancy her, man.
624
00:33:53,458 --> 00:33:55,500
No, I can't. She's my mate.
625
00:33:55,583 --> 00:33:59,125
- Piss.
- Get in there, my son. Go on, my son.
626
00:33:59,458 --> 00:34:02,042
All right. I'm only going
for a piss, man. Calm down.
627
00:34:05,708 --> 00:34:09,542
I am out of my nut. I'm telling you,
we're in for one fucking night, mate.
628
00:34:09,625 --> 00:34:12,417
Believe me, I'm telling ya.
You fucking stick with me.
629
00:34:12,500 --> 00:34:14,250
I'll look after ya.
I'll tell you that now.
630
00:34:14,333 --> 00:34:17,333
You've never buzzed like
you ever buzz with me. Do you hear me?
631
00:34:17,417 --> 00:34:20,542
(Lee) Oh! I thought I was just gonna drop
and have a blinder.
632
00:34:20,625 --> 00:34:23,833
What's all this shit about mind altering?
What's gonna happen to me?
633
00:34:24,792 --> 00:34:28,875
We believe that ecstasy
causes serotonin depletion
634
00:34:28,958 --> 00:34:32,000
and may lead to depression
in later life.
635
00:34:32,083 --> 00:34:33,500
(Jip) All right, Doc, fair enough.
636
00:34:33,583 --> 00:34:35,583
But on the flip side, Lee,
637
00:34:35,667 --> 00:34:38,125
you'll feel an overwhelming
sense of empathy with people.
638
00:34:38,208 --> 00:34:40,167
You'll be able to be intimate
with your friends,
639
00:34:40,250 --> 00:34:42,570
talk about things you never
felt comfortable enough to say.
640
00:34:42,625 --> 00:34:46,292
Overheating when dancing on ecstasy
641
00:34:46,375 --> 00:34:49,708
increases heart rate and palpitations,
642
00:34:49,792 --> 00:34:52,917
and can cause heatstroke,
resulting in death.
643
00:34:53,000 --> 00:34:55,750
Statistically,
you're more likely to die
644
00:34:55,833 --> 00:34:58,667
from choking on a cabbage leaf
or an argument in a pub
645
00:34:58,750 --> 00:35:00,583
than you are from dropping an E.
646
00:35:00,667 --> 00:35:05,750
Alcohol kills 30,000 people
a year alone in Britain.
647
00:35:05,833 --> 00:35:09,625
But that's all right because that's a good
taxable drug, nonetheless, isn't it?
648
00:35:09,708 --> 00:35:13,792
Your penis will shrivel up,
and you won't be able to get an erection.
649
00:35:16,458 --> 00:35:19,458
- Anyone who repeatedly takes ecstasy...
- (Bell tolling)
650
00:35:19,542 --> 00:35:24,667
...is punching the wall between
consciousness and unconsciousness.
651
00:35:24,750 --> 00:35:28,583
In later life,
instead of reaching for the lasers,
652
00:35:28,667 --> 00:35:31,125
you could be reaching
for the prescriptions.
653
00:35:32,375 --> 00:35:36,375
♪ I need a fix from you
to change my mood ♪
654
00:35:37,083 --> 00:35:38,083
Yeah.
655
00:35:42,667 --> 00:35:46,250
- Anyway, it's good seeing you again, man.
- Yeah, yeah. Take care.
656
00:35:46,333 --> 00:35:48,542
- See you in the club later on, yeah?
- Yeah, yeah, OK.
657
00:35:48,625 --> 00:35:49,875
- Nice one, nice one.
- Cheers.
658
00:35:49,958 --> 00:35:51,792
- Nice one. See ya.
- Cheers.
659
00:35:51,875 --> 00:35:54,042
See ya. See ya.
660
00:35:59,250 --> 00:36:00,417
Fucking hell, man.
661
00:36:01,792 --> 00:36:03,792
If we'd have been more honest
with each other,
662
00:36:03,875 --> 00:36:06,208
that conversation would have gone
a bit more like this.
663
00:36:06,292 --> 00:36:09,000
Fucking shame we had eye contact
when I walked in.
664
00:36:09,083 --> 00:36:10,375
Yeah, yeah, I know.
665
00:36:10,458 --> 00:36:13,333
Every time we bump into each other,
we kind of fall into this groove
666
00:36:13,417 --> 00:36:15,542
of pretending
that we like each other.
667
00:36:16,125 --> 00:36:17,625
I don't dislike anything about you,
668
00:36:17,708 --> 00:36:20,042
but I just don't like anything
about you either.
669
00:36:20,125 --> 00:36:23,958
Yeah. Together we kind of surf the waves
of social paranoia, don't we?
670
00:36:24,042 --> 00:36:26,625
No uncomfortable silences as yet.
671
00:36:26,708 --> 00:36:30,792
No, well, not as yet, but, you know,
our luck's not gonna last forever, is it?
672
00:36:30,875 --> 00:36:33,167
Maybe it's time
for your Houdini impression.
673
00:36:33,250 --> 00:36:36,333
Yeah, all right, man.
Uh, I'm gonna get a drink from the bar.
674
00:36:36,417 --> 00:36:37,917
And you're with friends.
675
00:36:38,000 --> 00:36:39,708
- And I'll see you later.
- That's the one.
676
00:36:39,792 --> 00:36:41,750
Let's pretend
we didn't see each other next time.
677
00:36:41,833 --> 00:36:44,417
- Absolutely crucifying as always, mate.
- Yeah, whatever.
678
00:36:44,500 --> 00:36:47,250
- Uh, look forward to seeing you.
- Yeah, like an illness.
679
00:36:47,333 --> 00:36:49,792
- Don't get run over.
- OK. Die.
680
00:36:49,875 --> 00:36:52,708
- Die. Wanker!
- Wanker!
681
00:36:52,792 --> 00:36:53,667
(Friend) Wanker...
682
00:36:53,750 --> 00:36:55,875
Friday night after the club, yeah?
683
00:36:57,625 --> 00:36:59,917
I got the horn,
so I ring one of them porn lines.
684
00:37:07,833 --> 00:37:08,833
Hello?
685
00:37:10,292 --> 00:37:11,292
Yeah.
686
00:37:12,250 --> 00:37:14,750
My name's... Bob.
687
00:37:14,833 --> 00:37:18,250
I'm from, uh... from West...
West London area.
688
00:37:18,333 --> 00:37:19,750
What colour drawers you got on?
689
00:37:19,833 --> 00:37:22,917
I'm whizzing me tits off, yeah?
I'm fucked.
690
00:37:23,000 --> 00:37:25,500
I end up going off on these...
on these tangents about me life
691
00:37:25,583 --> 00:37:27,708
and me aspirations
and shit like that, you know?
692
00:37:27,792 --> 00:37:29,375
It's like, "What are you doing?"
693
00:37:29,458 --> 00:37:33,333
Yeah, I'm a...
a business interpret... um...
694
00:37:33,417 --> 00:37:37,208
ultra... I'm an ultrapren...
ultrapreneur.
695
00:37:37,292 --> 00:37:40,542
Have you got brown nipples,
or just like...?
696
00:37:41,458 --> 00:37:45,667
What, you wear all... What, you wear
all black nail varnish and that, do ya?
697
00:37:45,750 --> 00:37:46,917
Fuck.
698
00:37:47,000 --> 00:37:49,417
Next thing I know,
the old man's hit me with,
699
00:37:49,500 --> 00:37:51,625
"Who the hell you been ringing
in Taiwan, boy?"
700
00:37:51,708 --> 00:37:53,833
- Who the hell you been calling in Taiwan?
- Taiwan?
701
00:37:53,917 --> 00:37:54,958
That's what he said.
702
00:37:55,042 --> 00:37:58,958
- Fucking hell.
- Listen, listen, listen. 145 fucking quid.
703
00:37:59,042 --> 00:38:03,417
- Fucking hell!
- I'm fucking telling you, man. 145 quid.
704
00:38:03,500 --> 00:38:05,958
- Believe it.
- Fucking hell, Moff.
705
00:38:06,792 --> 00:38:09,375
- Fuck! (Laughs)
- Jeez.
706
00:38:09,458 --> 00:38:12,625
Fair play, mate, fair play. That is
the most expensive wank I've ever heard of.
707
00:38:12,708 --> 00:38:14,833
- Fuck's sake. Keep it down, will ya?
- Sorry, sorry.
708
00:38:14,917 --> 00:38:18,250
- Sorry.
- Fucking hell. Listen, listen, right.
709
00:38:18,333 --> 00:38:21,083
What really took the piss was
she was more Cockney than me.
710
00:38:21,167 --> 00:38:24,667
Now, can you fucking believe that, Jip?
Do you know what I mean?
711
00:38:24,750 --> 00:38:28,083
- Listen, now the old cunt's giving it...
- I know you're sorry. You will be sorry.
712
00:38:28,167 --> 00:38:30,792
If in seven days you don't pay it off,
I'm gonna chuck you out.
713
00:38:30,875 --> 00:38:32,417
That's nice, Dad. That is so nice.
714
00:38:32,500 --> 00:38:35,333
You lie in bed all fucking day.
You haven't had a job for over a year.
715
00:38:35,417 --> 00:38:36,708
You don't have a girlfriend.
716
00:38:36,792 --> 00:38:38,708
- You're throwing your life away, boy!
- I see.
717
00:38:38,792 --> 00:38:41,333
And chucking me out,
that's just what I need at the moment.
718
00:38:41,417 --> 00:38:44,000
Don't give me that bollocks,
cos it ain't even your gaff.
719
00:38:44,083 --> 00:38:46,000
Well, it won't be your gaff
in a fucking week.
720
00:38:46,083 --> 00:38:48,250
- No?
- You're 20 years of age, for fuck's sake!
721
00:38:48,333 --> 00:38:50,875
You really don't understand
at all, do you, eh?
722
00:38:50,958 --> 00:38:53,292
I haven't got one friend
that actually enjoys their job.
723
00:38:53,375 --> 00:38:55,542
Each one counts down the days
till Friday.
724
00:38:55,625 --> 00:38:59,083
Dad, I'm not ready
to become that miserable.
725
00:38:59,167 --> 00:39:01,792
- Matthew!
- Life's hard enough, for fuck's sake.
726
00:39:01,875 --> 00:39:04,458
- I'm still researching.
- Everyone's gotta work, Matthew!
727
00:39:04,542 --> 00:39:06,458
Don't you understand?
I'm unemployed full time.
728
00:39:06,542 --> 00:39:08,333
I ain't got enough hours
in the fucking day.
729
00:39:08,417 --> 00:39:11,292
Enough hours in the fucking day?
You ain't even here in the fucking day.
730
00:39:11,375 --> 00:39:13,542
And take this with you and all,
you fucking little...
731
00:39:13,625 --> 00:39:15,042
Yeah? Bollocks!
732
00:39:15,125 --> 00:39:18,250
I mean, how many times have I told you?
Get your own fucking flat.
733
00:39:18,333 --> 00:39:21,417
Get your own flat.
You need your own flat, man. Seriously.
734
00:39:21,500 --> 00:39:24,375
It's a piece of piss.
You can get it on the social.
735
00:39:24,458 --> 00:39:26,292
Where am I gonna go,
for fuck's sake?
736
00:39:27,500 --> 00:39:30,250
I don't know.
What the fuck do you care?
737
00:39:30,333 --> 00:39:32,667
As long as it's got
a fucking phone line, it's all right.
738
00:39:32,750 --> 00:39:34,458
Fuck off, you cunt.
739
00:39:35,417 --> 00:39:38,500
(Jip) I can't fucking relax.
Glad to see I'm not alone.
740
00:39:38,583 --> 00:39:41,583
I really wanna lose my inhibitions,
you know, be able to talk to strangers,
741
00:39:41,667 --> 00:39:44,500
break the ice,
but I can't be arsed either.
742
00:39:44,583 --> 00:39:46,708
I don't need this stress
on my night off.
743
00:39:46,792 --> 00:39:50,458
Britain, chill the fuck out
and then show me how to do it.
744
00:39:50,542 --> 00:39:53,542
I think it's time
for a new national anthem, you know?
745
00:39:53,625 --> 00:39:54,958
One I can relate to.
746
00:39:55,833 --> 00:40:00,125
{\an8}(Singing to tune of national anthem)
747
00:40:31,417 --> 00:40:34,417
{\an8}(All singing)
748
00:41:06,708 --> 00:41:09,708
(Cheering and whistling)
749
00:41:11,292 --> 00:41:12,792
(Jip) Yeah, well, maybe not.
750
00:41:14,542 --> 00:41:16,875
(♪ CG Bolland: "It Ain't Gonna Be Me")
751
00:41:20,833 --> 00:41:22,083
♪ It ain't gonna be me
752
00:41:35,167 --> 00:41:36,750
♪ It ain't gonna be me
753
00:41:49,292 --> 00:41:50,375
♪ It ain't gonna be me
754
00:42:10,625 --> 00:42:11,917
♪ It ain't gonna be me ♪
755
00:42:18,542 --> 00:42:21,875
(Jip) No, no, Moff, Moff.
This is not funny, man. Don't fuck about.
756
00:42:21,958 --> 00:42:25,208
Look, look, I just don't understand.
I had it in here. I had it in here.
757
00:42:26,292 --> 00:42:27,500
Have you left it in the pub?
758
00:42:27,583 --> 00:42:31,083
No, I didn't take me wallet out once.
I was paying with shrapnel in there.
759
00:42:31,167 --> 00:42:33,000
Maybe there are tickets on the door.
760
00:42:33,083 --> 00:42:35,208
No way. No way. Not tonight.
761
00:42:35,292 --> 00:42:38,208
- Oh, fuck.
- I'm so sorry, Lu. I'm sorry.
762
00:42:38,292 --> 00:42:41,208
Look, forget it, man. It was a bad card.
It just wasn't meant to happen.
763
00:42:41,292 --> 00:42:44,125
- What a fuckin' anticlimax.
- (Doorman) Thank you.
764
00:42:44,208 --> 00:42:47,125
No, this is not gonna happen, man.
No way is this gonna happen.
765
00:42:47,208 --> 00:42:50,292
- (Doorman) Thank you.
- Koop, what's the owner of this club called?
766
00:42:50,375 --> 00:42:52,625
- Peter.
- No, it's not Peter.
767
00:42:52,708 --> 00:42:56,333
- It's a Spanish name. Pablo.
- Pablo Hassan? No way, mate.
768
00:42:56,417 --> 00:42:59,083
- Pablo Hassan.
- (Koop) No, mate. Don't even think about it.
769
00:42:59,167 --> 00:43:01,000
- No, sweetheart. You can't.
- (Nina) Oh, no.
770
00:43:01,083 --> 00:43:03,417
Seriously, right,
if I'm not back here in ten minutes,
771
00:43:03,500 --> 00:43:04,792
I'll see you in there, right?
772
00:43:04,875 --> 00:43:06,542
- Sweetheart, you can't.
- Ten minutes.
773
00:43:06,625 --> 00:43:08,292
- Jip, he'll kill you, mate.
- Jip. Jip.
774
00:43:08,375 --> 00:43:10,042
- Excuse me, mate.
- What?
775
00:43:10,125 --> 00:43:12,250
I'm from Mixmag.
Got an appointment with Mr Hassan.
776
00:43:12,333 --> 00:43:16,167
- Jip, sweetheart, no. It's not worth it.
- Go on, my son. Go on, my son.
777
00:43:16,250 --> 00:43:18,750
- I'm a bit late, mate.
- Whoa.
778
00:43:18,833 --> 00:43:22,375
- Oh, no. It's not worth it, man.
- Have a bit of faith, will you?
779
00:43:22,458 --> 00:43:24,958
I've got an appointment with your boss.
Can I go in, please?
780
00:43:25,042 --> 00:43:27,333
- Pablo Hassan.
- Listen to me.
781
00:43:27,417 --> 00:43:29,167
This geezer's never let me down yet.
782
00:43:29,250 --> 00:43:31,542
- I'm telling you now.
- He's not gonna get in.
783
00:43:33,375 --> 00:43:35,250
- (Koop)Ah!
- (Nina) He's gonna get battered.
784
00:43:35,333 --> 00:43:37,417
- Don't fuck about, does he?
- (Koop) What?
785
00:43:40,333 --> 00:43:42,500
(Jip) Jip, what the fuck
are you doing, man?
786
00:43:42,583 --> 00:43:46,167
This is Pablo Hassan,
a complete schizophrenic cokehead.
787
00:43:46,250 --> 00:43:51,167
If he susses you're blagging him,
his boys are gonna fucking maim you, man.
788
00:43:51,250 --> 00:43:54,667
Ah, but he likes to think himself
as a bit of a businessman, yeah?
789
00:43:54,750 --> 00:43:57,208
Yeah. And I came here
to do business.
790
00:43:58,292 --> 00:44:01,458
(Sniffs) Hiya. Pablo Hassan?
791
00:44:01,542 --> 00:44:03,125
Tony Trueman. Sorry I'm late.
792
00:44:03,208 --> 00:44:05,417
- I don't know anything about this, man.
- No?
793
00:44:05,500 --> 00:44:08,042
- No.
- (Sighs)
794
00:44:08,125 --> 00:44:12,125
Oh. Well... my secretary phoned here
yesterday afternoon.
795
00:44:12,208 --> 00:44:14,583
She, um...
She spoke to someone here,
796
00:44:14,667 --> 00:44:16,625
arranged a meeting for tonight,
eight o'clock.
797
00:44:16,708 --> 00:44:20,792
- Well, news to me, man.
- Oh, God. I don't believe this.
798
00:44:20,875 --> 00:44:26,167
Well, basically, what it is, Mixmag, yeah,
have done a survey of Welsh clubs.
799
00:44:26,250 --> 00:44:28,125
The Asylum has been voted
800
00:44:28,208 --> 00:44:31,083
the best club atmosphere
in the whole of Wales.
801
00:44:31,167 --> 00:44:32,833
- Nice one.
- (Jip) He's going for it.
802
00:44:32,917 --> 00:44:35,167
Yeah. We're gonna do a...
a double-page spread.
803
00:44:35,250 --> 00:44:37,875
I'll interview yourself, obviously,
resident DJs,
804
00:44:37,958 --> 00:44:40,208
uh, some of the clubbers,
shoot everything.
805
00:44:40,292 --> 00:44:42,042
Jip, you're overdoing it, man.
806
00:44:42,125 --> 00:44:43,958
- Do you wanna do it now?
- Don't blow it.
807
00:44:44,042 --> 00:44:48,708
Well, you see, that's the only problem.
Uh, you're not gonna believe this.
808
00:44:48,792 --> 00:44:51,000
Just got down here from London,
and I've just found out
809
00:44:51,083 --> 00:44:53,792
my photographer was involved
in a fucking car crash
810
00:44:53,875 --> 00:44:55,167
on the way here tonight, man.
811
00:44:55,250 --> 00:44:56,792
What am I talking about?
812
00:44:56,875 --> 00:45:01,333
I mean, it's nothing serious. It's just...
It just means we can't do it tonight.
813
00:45:01,417 --> 00:45:05,208
So, you drove all the way down here from
London just so you can't give an interview?
814
00:45:05,875 --> 00:45:07,583
It's all over, Jip. You fucked it up.
815
00:45:07,667 --> 00:45:12,333
(Chuckles) I know. It's... Fuck's sake.
I'm sorry about this, mate. Um...
816
00:45:12,417 --> 00:45:14,667
Can I use your phone?
Someone's made a big fuck-up here.
817
00:45:14,750 --> 00:45:18,500
I wanna talk to my secretary,
sort this out. Cheers.
818
00:45:22,792 --> 00:45:23,792
Come on.
819
00:45:24,833 --> 00:45:26,583
Carmel? Yeah, it's me.
820
00:45:27,792 --> 00:45:29,333
Yeah, I'm in Wales.
821
00:45:29,417 --> 00:45:32,417
Listen, what the fuck's going on?
I'm with Pablo Hassan now. It's...
822
00:45:32,500 --> 00:45:34,625
Yeah, all right. I don't wanna hear it.
823
00:45:34,708 --> 00:45:37,958
Listen, has Danny Rampling confirmed
his set tomorrow night at Ministry?
824
00:45:38,583 --> 00:45:41,458
- Danny who, love?
- He did? OK, all right.
825
00:45:41,542 --> 00:45:42,875
Cheers, Carmel. All right.
826
00:45:42,958 --> 00:45:45,125
Oh, have you heard any more
about Scott's accident?
827
00:45:45,208 --> 00:45:48,625
- What accident?
- Yeah, OK. All right. See you later.
828
00:45:48,708 --> 00:45:50,042
(Dialling tone)
829
00:45:51,667 --> 00:45:53,542
(Whispers) Dizzy bitch.
830
00:45:53,625 --> 00:45:54,875
Cheers, mate. Uh...
831
00:45:56,375 --> 00:45:59,458
I can't do tomorrow night. Uh...
Next Friday night?
832
00:45:59,542 --> 00:46:01,542
- Is that all right with you?
- We'll go for that.
833
00:46:01,625 --> 00:46:03,583
Nice one.
Sorry about the fuck-up tonight, mate.
834
00:46:03,667 --> 00:46:05,667
- We'll get it right next time.
- All right, Tony.
835
00:46:05,750 --> 00:46:07,667
All right.
I'll see you next Friday, mate.
836
00:46:08,708 --> 00:46:11,625
(Jip, imitating Del Boy)
He who dares, my son. He who dares.
837
00:46:11,708 --> 00:46:13,167
Nice one, mate. Nice one.
838
00:46:14,708 --> 00:46:17,875
- (Dance music playing)
- (Nina) He'd fucking better be all right.
839
00:46:19,500 --> 00:46:20,750
Course he's here.
840
00:46:21,625 --> 00:46:24,583
- We're in! Come on!
- Come on! Yeah!
841
00:46:24,667 --> 00:46:27,000
- Yeah! Come on!
- Come on! Where is he? Where...
842
00:46:28,167 --> 00:46:29,958
- (Moff) See?
- He's here!
843
00:46:30,667 --> 00:46:33,208
(Koop)What a guy! What a guy!
844
00:46:38,750 --> 00:46:40,208
- Babe!
- What did I tell ya?
845
00:46:40,292 --> 00:46:41,500
- Yeah!
- What happened?
846
00:46:41,583 --> 00:46:43,000
Oh, man.
847
00:46:43,542 --> 00:46:45,292
A heart attack is what happened.
848
00:46:45,375 --> 00:46:47,167
I don't care! You're here now.
849
00:46:52,333 --> 00:46:53,333
Doves, is it?
850
00:46:54,625 --> 00:46:56,542
- Yeah, mate.
- Fuckin' laced, anyway.
851
00:46:56,625 --> 00:46:58,375
- Yeah. A bit of speed, a bit of speed.
852
00:46:58,458 --> 00:47:00,667
- Yeah. Like, proper as fuck, man.
853
00:47:01,375 --> 00:47:03,375
- Checking out the bush, yeah?
- Oh, man.
854
00:47:03,458 --> 00:47:07,542
I'm checking out the bush
fuckin' 24/7, fuckin' 365.
855
00:47:08,750 --> 00:47:11,000
- What's your name, mate?
- Oh, safe as fuck, man.
856
00:47:11,083 --> 00:47:12,875
- What?
- What?
857
00:47:12,958 --> 00:47:14,417
Your name's Safe As Fuck?
858
00:47:15,542 --> 00:47:18,458
- Don't know what you're on about, man.
- I asked you what your name was.
859
00:47:18,542 --> 00:47:20,125
You just said "Safe as fuck".
860
00:47:21,042 --> 00:47:23,458
You're off the hook,
but I don't know, like.
861
00:47:23,542 --> 00:47:25,083
I'm mullered, mate, I'm mullered.
862
00:47:25,583 --> 00:47:26,583
Inca Holmes.
863
00:47:28,125 --> 00:47:30,042
- Yeah, Felix.
- Oh, man.
864
00:47:30,125 --> 00:47:33,458
Yeah. Nice... Nice one, mate.
Keep the spirit alive, yeah?
865
00:47:34,542 --> 00:47:35,750
Safe as fuck.
866
00:47:36,792 --> 00:47:37,667
All right, babe?
867
00:47:37,750 --> 00:47:39,208
(Dance music playing)
868
00:47:39,292 --> 00:47:40,375
Come on!
869
00:47:45,083 --> 00:47:47,083
- Oh!
- Yeah, man.
870
00:47:47,167 --> 00:47:49,083
- Go easy, go easy.
- Oh!
871
00:48:38,750 --> 00:48:40,833
(Upbeat dance music playing)
872
00:48:40,917 --> 00:48:43,042
(Lee) Wonder how the drug system
works in here.
873
00:48:46,542 --> 00:48:50,042
{\an8}Every club is different,
but in the Asylum, it's the manager.
874
00:48:50,125 --> 00:48:52,375
{\an8}He has a string of homeboys
dealing the pukka Es
875
00:48:52,458 --> 00:48:54,292
to the party people in the club.
876
00:48:54,375 --> 00:48:56,792
He makes the most coin
out of this enterprise.
877
00:48:56,875 --> 00:48:59,625
His homies will make
just a couple of quid on each pukka.
878
00:48:59,708 --> 00:49:02,875
His homies are also scoping
for other dealers on the block.
879
00:49:02,958 --> 00:49:06,208
When the homies have an illegitimate
pukka E dealer in their website,
880
00:49:06,292 --> 00:49:07,667
they tell the bouncers.
881
00:49:07,750 --> 00:49:09,625
The bouncers grip him, nab his stash,
882
00:49:09,708 --> 00:49:11,708
and kick him out
with a physical warning,
883
00:49:11,792 --> 00:49:13,375
gives the pukka Es to their homies,
884
00:49:13,458 --> 00:49:15,833
and they knock out
to the kids in the club.
885
00:49:15,917 --> 00:49:17,875
What's your name?
What have you had?
886
00:49:17,958 --> 00:49:20,750
Reach for the lasers. Safe as fuck.
887
00:49:20,833 --> 00:49:23,833
(Dance music continues)
888
00:49:32,375 --> 00:49:35,167
(Crowd cheering)
889
00:49:44,083 --> 00:49:48,250
(Women) Hi, Jerry! We came
all the way from Cardiff to say hi!
890
00:49:48,333 --> 00:49:49,792
(Interviewer) Excuse me, girls. Hi.
891
00:49:49,875 --> 00:49:53,208
We're doing a documentary for television
on the British club culture.
892
00:49:53,292 --> 00:49:56,042
- Would you mind answering a few questions?
- Yeah, fire away.
893
00:49:56,125 --> 00:49:59,042
Oh, great. OK, Eric? OK.
894
00:49:59,125 --> 00:50:02,208
Um, can I start by asking
why you come to these nights?
895
00:50:02,292 --> 00:50:06,208
- I'd like to answer that one, if I may.
- Sure. Go ahead.
896
00:50:06,292 --> 00:50:10,375
To get absolutely trashed.
897
00:50:10,458 --> 00:50:14,083
- Do you take ecstasy?
- No, no. Well, we used to.
898
00:50:14,167 --> 00:50:17,375
But now we just jack up heroin
and float round the club.
899
00:50:17,458 --> 00:50:20,792
- You take heroin to come to the club?
- Mmm. Yeah, well, we never used to.
900
00:50:20,875 --> 00:50:23,125
- But then we saw Trainspotting, didn't we?
- Oh, yeah.
901
00:50:23,208 --> 00:50:25,083
- And that just made us want to do it.
- Yeah.
902
00:50:25,167 --> 00:50:27,708
And sometimes if we watch
New Jack Hustler before we go out,
903
00:50:27,792 --> 00:50:29,250
we smoke a bit of crack too.
904
00:50:29,333 --> 00:50:32,292
We just seem to be
so impressionable.
905
00:50:32,375 --> 00:50:35,083
Well, it's the youth of today, you see.
906
00:50:35,167 --> 00:50:37,708
They need older people
to show 'em how to live.
907
00:50:37,792 --> 00:50:42,375
Yeah. See, we learn from their mistakes,
cos they've done it all before.
908
00:50:42,458 --> 00:50:44,917
- Yeah. Look at Jimi Hendrix.
- And Elvis.
909
00:50:45,000 --> 00:50:47,250
- And Sting.
- Sting's not dead yet.
910
00:50:47,333 --> 00:50:48,875
No, but he should be.
911
00:50:51,458 --> 00:50:53,375
Oh, uh, sorry. Do you have the time?
912
00:50:53,458 --> 00:50:55,292
Um, yeah, it's quarter to one.
913
00:50:55,375 --> 00:50:58,250
Oh, shit. We've gotta go.
We're late for our next hit.
914
00:50:58,333 --> 00:51:00,167
- Hi, Mum!
- Hi, Mum!
915
00:51:04,208 --> 00:51:05,417
Bye.
916
00:51:05,500 --> 00:51:06,958
Fuckin' piss-takers.
917
00:51:08,333 --> 00:51:10,417
What the fuck are we doin' here?
918
00:51:12,208 --> 00:51:15,250
I don't care what anyone says,
it's not like it used to be.
919
00:51:15,333 --> 00:51:16,917
It's gone too widespread.
920
00:51:17,875 --> 00:51:21,000
It used to attract,
like, open-minded people
921
00:51:21,083 --> 00:51:22,833
who were lookin' for something new.
922
00:51:22,917 --> 00:51:24,167
Yeah, yeah.
923
00:51:24,250 --> 00:51:27,083
- And people were a lot more friendly.
- Oh, yeah.
924
00:51:27,167 --> 00:51:32,625
Now it's almost a cliché, right, to talk
to a stranger in a club for some people.
925
00:51:32,708 --> 00:51:34,708
There was this sense
of everyone coming together
926
00:51:34,792 --> 00:51:36,542
and doing what the fuck they liked.
927
00:51:36,625 --> 00:51:38,833
And the more you let go,
the more people got off on it.
928
00:51:38,917 --> 00:51:41,333
That's it. And now look at it.
929
00:51:41,417 --> 00:51:44,958
It's so much more play it down,
I'm so cool.
930
00:51:45,042 --> 00:51:46,083
- Fuck off!
- Yeah.
931
00:51:46,167 --> 00:51:49,750
We have lost the fundamental reason
for using E in the first place.
932
00:51:49,833 --> 00:51:53,042
Which is to leave your ego
at the door
933
00:51:53,125 --> 00:51:56,333
and feel comfortable enough
to communicate with strangers.
934
00:51:56,417 --> 00:51:58,125
- Yeah.
- Do you know what I mean?
935
00:51:58,208 --> 00:52:01,083
Oi! Easy, man. F...
936
00:52:02,625 --> 00:52:03,667
Twat.
937
00:52:04,458 --> 00:52:07,375
Ah, do you remember
when this was Tom Toms, man?
938
00:52:07,458 --> 00:52:10,125
- Tom Toms.
- Oh! Hi-de-hi!
939
00:52:10,667 --> 00:52:15,333
(DJ) Fuckin' reach for the lasers!
940
00:52:15,417 --> 00:52:17,708
Ecstasy in waves!
941
00:52:17,792 --> 00:52:19,958
Reach out and touch a friend!
942
00:52:20,042 --> 00:52:23,000
(DJ continues indistinctly)
943
00:52:23,083 --> 00:52:25,917
Ecstasy respects everyone!
944
00:52:26,000 --> 00:52:28,167
Let's go massive, Cardiff!
945
00:52:28,250 --> 00:52:30,917
See your hands in the fuckin' air!
946
00:52:31,500 --> 00:52:33,208
Yeah!
947
00:52:33,292 --> 00:52:35,167
Reach up to the whole fuckin' nation.
948
00:52:35,250 --> 00:52:37,167
Hardcore massive. No more aggression.
949
00:52:37,250 --> 00:52:38,875
Reach up, reach up. No more aggression.
950
00:52:38,958 --> 00:52:41,750
Reach up, reach up. Hardcore massive.
951
00:52:41,833 --> 00:52:44,917
We're here to express. Have fun.
952
00:52:45,000 --> 00:52:47,167
Peace! Unity of love!
953
00:52:47,708 --> 00:52:50,042
- (Laughs)
- Oklahoma!
954
00:52:50,125 --> 00:52:51,833
- Whoo!
- (Laughs)
955
00:52:52,542 --> 00:52:55,542
(Dance music playing)
956
00:53:02,583 --> 00:53:04,917
Right, I'm gonna tell you something.
957
00:53:05,000 --> 00:53:09,250
If this ever spreads,
I will fucking die, right?
958
00:53:09,333 --> 00:53:12,500
I know you won't. I know, I know.
But I'm just saying. Yeah?
959
00:53:12,583 --> 00:53:14,333
- Mmm.
- OK.
960
00:53:14,417 --> 00:53:15,583
- Are you ready?
- Yeah.
961
00:53:15,667 --> 00:53:16,958
- Are you sure?
- Yeah.
962
00:53:17,042 --> 00:53:17,917
All right.
963
00:53:18,000 --> 00:53:19,875
You're gonna regret this
in the morning, Jip.
964
00:53:19,958 --> 00:53:22,167
I am sexually paranoid.
965
00:53:22,250 --> 00:53:25,875
I'm sexually paranoid.
I'm sexually paranoid.
966
00:53:25,958 --> 00:53:28,583
(Lulu chuckles)
967
00:53:30,750 --> 00:53:32,750
Welcome to the '90s, Jip.
968
00:53:34,542 --> 00:53:36,833
Seriously. Sorry. Go on.
969
00:53:36,917 --> 00:53:40,708
Well, I kiss girls and all, yeah,
and it's fine.
970
00:53:40,792 --> 00:53:45,000
And as soon as I sense
that they want sex,
971
00:53:45,958 --> 00:53:48,875
I just make my fucking excuses
and I'm out of there, man.
972
00:53:50,042 --> 00:53:52,542
- I know, it's pathetic. I know it is.
- No, no.
973
00:53:54,333 --> 00:53:56,417
Everything happens
for a reason, Jip.
974
00:53:58,250 --> 00:54:01,167
Yeah, but this is not me, Lu.
Do you know what I... This is not me.
975
00:54:02,042 --> 00:54:03,208
Give me an example.
976
00:54:06,458 --> 00:54:08,083
- An example?
- Mm-hm.
977
00:54:09,750 --> 00:54:11,458
All right. Uh...
978
00:54:18,625 --> 00:54:20,750
- What had you been doing?
- Well, I was stoned.
979
00:54:20,833 --> 00:54:23,333
Absolutely stoned
out me trumpet, man.
980
00:54:25,625 --> 00:54:28,542
You just do not look like
you're enjoying this at all.
981
00:54:28,625 --> 00:54:29,917
I know, I know. Listen to this.
982
00:54:30,000 --> 00:54:31,667
(Jip) She's more experienced than you.
983
00:54:31,750 --> 00:54:34,750
She's gonna see your cock soon,
say she's disappointed.
984
00:54:34,833 --> 00:54:36,542
Oh, stop thinking this shit.
Come on!
985
00:54:36,625 --> 00:54:38,917
You're gonna fuck the arse off her.
She's gonna love it.
986
00:54:39,000 --> 00:54:40,500
Say if you lose it during sex.
987
00:54:40,583 --> 00:54:42,500
I bet she's had
some amazing shags in her time.
988
00:54:42,583 --> 00:54:46,500
Oh, shut up, shut up!
Oh, no. Fuck. Oh, it's going down.
989
00:54:46,583 --> 00:54:49,458
Oh, God, please,
please do me this solid.
990
00:54:49,542 --> 00:54:51,167
- (Yells)
- (Laughs)
991
00:54:51,250 --> 00:54:52,750
Listen to this, listen to this.
992
00:54:54,708 --> 00:54:56,042
What's wrong?
993
00:54:56,917 --> 00:54:57,917
Nothing.
994
00:54:58,667 --> 00:55:00,250
Are you OK?
995
00:55:01,375 --> 00:55:04,167
Yeah, yeah. I'm... I'm fine. Uh...
996
00:55:05,792 --> 00:55:08,917
Just a bit tired, that's all. Sorry.
997
00:55:14,167 --> 00:55:16,042
I've never had that
happen to me before.
998
00:55:16,125 --> 00:55:19,542
- Oh, she's making it worse, man!
- I know, but it was my fault, really.
999
00:55:19,625 --> 00:55:21,917
If it wasn't for the way
my head was thinking that night,
1000
00:55:22,000 --> 00:55:23,417
everything would have been fine.
1001
00:55:23,500 --> 00:55:25,708
That is bollocks.
We're not fucking robots.
1002
00:55:25,792 --> 00:55:27,167
There's no rules to sex.
1003
00:55:29,417 --> 00:55:32,208
I've gotta get up in the morning.
I'd better go, OK?
1004
00:55:33,125 --> 00:55:34,583
(Jip) Um, OK.
1005
00:55:36,500 --> 00:55:40,083
(Laughs) Oh, no. Now she's paranoid.
1006
00:55:40,167 --> 00:55:41,917
She thinks it's to do with her.
1007
00:55:42,625 --> 00:55:45,583
- Yeah.
- Yeah, I'll... I'll give you a call, yeah?
1008
00:55:47,875 --> 00:55:49,417
- Bye.
- (Lulu) Oh, God.
1009
00:55:50,708 --> 00:55:52,042
All I could think was...
1010
00:55:54,833 --> 00:55:58,125
Fuck me. I'm impotent.
1011
00:56:00,417 --> 00:56:04,875
(Chuckling) Oh! You poor baby.
1012
00:56:04,958 --> 00:56:06,167
- Oh.
- Come here.
1013
00:56:06,250 --> 00:56:08,250
(Jip) Mmm. Mmm.
1014
00:56:10,042 --> 00:56:13,042
(Dance music playing)
1015
00:56:39,542 --> 00:56:41,792
(Music fades)
1016
00:56:48,208 --> 00:56:49,333
(Jip) Present has gone.
1017
00:56:50,167 --> 00:56:53,292
Fantasy is a part of reality,
1018
00:56:53,375 --> 00:56:54,667
and we take the brakes off.
1019
00:56:55,667 --> 00:56:58,917
We're thinking clearly,
yet not thinking at all.
1020
00:57:00,000 --> 00:57:01,667
And this feels right.
1021
00:57:02,750 --> 00:57:04,958
We stop trying to control things.
1022
00:57:05,625 --> 00:57:08,583
Warm rush of chemicals through us.
1023
00:57:09,917 --> 00:57:11,417
We're fluctuating.
1024
00:57:12,375 --> 00:57:13,833
Is this brain damage?
1025
00:57:15,000 --> 00:57:18,375
We forget all the pain
and the hurt in life.
1026
00:57:18,458 --> 00:57:19,958
We wanna go somewhere else.
1027
00:57:20,042 --> 00:57:22,542
We're not threatened
by people any more.
1028
00:57:23,417 --> 00:57:26,833
All our in securities
have evaporated.
1029
00:57:27,708 --> 00:57:30,792
We're in the clouds now.
We're wide open.
1030
00:57:31,333 --> 00:57:34,000
We're spacemen orbiting the Earth.
1031
00:57:34,083 --> 00:57:37,917
(Chuckles) Yeah, the world
looks beautiful from here, man.
1032
00:57:38,792 --> 00:57:43,125
We're nympholeptics
desiring for the unobtainable.
1033
00:57:43,958 --> 00:57:48,208
We risk sanity for moments
of temporary enlightenment.
1034
00:57:48,292 --> 00:57:51,500
So many ideas. So little memory.
1035
00:57:52,708 --> 00:57:56,750
The last thought killed
by anticipation of the next.
1036
00:57:56,833 --> 00:57:59,958
We embrace
an overwhelming feeling of love.
1037
00:58:00,667 --> 00:58:03,875
We flow in unison. We're together.
1038
00:58:04,458 --> 00:58:06,042
I wish this was real.
1039
00:58:06,792 --> 00:58:09,792
We want a universal level
of togetherness
1040
00:58:09,875 --> 00:58:12,417
where we're comfortable
with everyone.
1041
00:58:13,250 --> 00:58:16,458
We're in rhythm.
Part of a movement.
1042
00:58:17,625 --> 00:58:21,292
A movement to escape.
We wave goodbye.
1043
00:58:22,333 --> 00:58:25,042
Ultimately, we just wanna be happy.
1044
00:58:26,292 --> 00:58:28,417
Yeah. Yeah.
1045
00:58:28,500 --> 00:58:30,250
(Chuckles)
1046
00:58:30,333 --> 00:58:33,667
Hang on. What... What the fuck
was I just talking about?
1047
00:58:34,792 --> 00:58:36,667
(Laughs)
1048
00:58:44,125 --> 00:58:47,125
(Dance music playing)
1049
00:59:15,375 --> 00:59:19,083
(Jip) Koop is having severe trouble
adjusting to the love boat, man.
1050
00:59:19,167 --> 00:59:22,208
Every time we go out,
he's always gotta spoil it for himself.
1051
00:59:22,292 --> 00:59:24,708
And it's painful to see
what he puts his head through.
1052
00:59:24,792 --> 00:59:27,667
He gets jealous of men
even looking at Nina, you know?
1053
00:59:27,750 --> 00:59:30,500
He feels threatened
by any bloke that speaks to her.
1054
00:59:31,292 --> 00:59:35,625
Nina knows a lot of people. I mean,
she's a really affectionate character.
1055
00:59:35,708 --> 00:59:37,833
But she's fallen for Koop
in a big way.
1056
00:59:37,917 --> 00:59:41,583
He's so fucking lucky, man.
I'd do anything to have what he's got.
1057
00:59:41,667 --> 00:59:44,542
But he's stupid, you know.
He's fucking it up with his male ego.
1058
00:59:44,625 --> 00:59:47,208
He gets paranoid with everyone, man.
1059
00:59:47,292 --> 00:59:49,042
Shit, he even gets it
with his mates.
1060
00:59:49,958 --> 00:59:52,958
(Dance music playing)
1061
01:00:08,083 --> 01:00:10,417
(Koop) You wanna fuck her,
don't you?
1062
01:00:12,208 --> 01:00:14,875
- No.
- (Koop) Don't fucking lie to me.
1063
01:00:14,958 --> 01:00:18,292
You've been staring at her arse
for the last ten minutes.
1064
01:00:19,792 --> 01:00:22,750
Yeah, all right, fair play, Koop.
But, fuck me, she's horny as fuck.
1065
01:00:22,833 --> 01:00:25,625
I ain't gonna do nothing, am I?
She's your bird, for fuck's sake.
1066
01:00:25,708 --> 01:00:28,125
Yeah, that's right.
She's my bird. My fucking bird.
1067
01:00:28,208 --> 01:00:30,542
Do you understand that?
So stop looking at her.
1068
01:00:30,625 --> 01:00:32,250
All right, Koop, mate.
Yeah, all right.
1069
01:00:32,333 --> 01:00:34,875
I'm just checking her out, mate,
like all the others.
1070
01:00:34,958 --> 01:00:37,667
But that's it, Moff, she's not
all the fuckin' others. She's mine!
1071
01:00:37,750 --> 01:00:39,250
You can't stop me looking at her.
1072
01:00:39,333 --> 01:00:42,292
How dare you imagine fancying Nina,
you cunt, Moff.
1073
01:00:42,375 --> 01:00:44,708
Hold up a minute. Hold up.
1074
01:00:44,792 --> 01:00:47,375
Are you the fucking thought police
or something? What's this?
1075
01:00:47,458 --> 01:00:49,500
Moff, you can look
at any other girl in here.
1076
01:00:49,583 --> 01:00:51,750
Pick 'em. There's plenty to choose from.
Just not her!
1077
01:00:51,833 --> 01:00:54,167
Yeah, Koop, I'm with you 100%, mate.
1078
01:00:54,250 --> 01:00:57,167
But, I mean, how do I know the next bird
ain't gonna have a bloke?
1079
01:00:57,250 --> 01:01:00,542
No, no, fuck that, Moff. Fuck it!
Cos it wouldn't matter to you anyway.
1080
01:01:00,625 --> 01:01:02,792
Because you'd still imagine
fucking her, wouldn't ya?
1081
01:01:02,875 --> 01:01:04,667
Do you know why you know
the answer to that?
1082
01:01:04,750 --> 01:01:06,542
Why do I know that, Moff?
Why do I know?
1083
01:01:06,625 --> 01:01:08,958
Because you're just the same
as the rest of us, mate.
1084
01:01:15,208 --> 01:01:17,750
(Dance music playing)
1085
01:01:26,083 --> 01:01:27,833
So, babe,
did you have a fucking pearler?
1086
01:01:27,917 --> 01:01:29,083
I've had a shit-hot time.
1087
01:01:29,167 --> 01:01:31,833
Listen, there's a party happening
in Super Ely, all right?
1088
01:01:31,917 --> 01:01:34,583
- Yeah, I know. I'm going with my mates.
- What mates?
1089
01:01:34,667 --> 01:01:35,958
- My mates.
- Nice one, Lee.
1090
01:01:36,042 --> 01:01:37,542
- I'll see you in the wheels.
- Yeah.
1091
01:01:37,625 --> 01:01:39,375
True, man. Nice, nice...
1092
01:01:40,542 --> 01:01:42,667
- I'll see you in a bit, yeah?
- Yeah.
1093
01:01:43,542 --> 01:01:45,542
Who the fuck
are those dodgy fuckers?
1094
01:01:47,708 --> 01:01:48,708
Lee?
1095
01:01:52,333 --> 01:01:55,792
- (Coughs)
- (Laughing)
1096
01:01:55,875 --> 01:01:58,875
- (Coughing continues)
- Virgin toker, is it, Lee?
1097
01:02:02,292 --> 01:02:04,042
No, you wanna stick with me, Lee.
1098
01:02:04,125 --> 01:02:06,917
I'm like fucking Ziggy Marley
or something, man. I'm telling you.
1099
01:02:07,667 --> 01:02:10,000
No, I'm Ziggy Marlon. (Laughs)
1100
01:02:10,083 --> 01:02:12,625
Ziggy Marlon
in the motherfucking house!
1101
01:02:12,708 --> 01:02:14,042
Sorted, man.
1102
01:02:15,750 --> 01:02:17,708
Workin' the fucking herb, man.
1103
01:02:17,792 --> 01:02:21,458
I've smoked enough Thai. More than
these pussies, man, I'm telling you.
1104
01:02:21,542 --> 01:02:24,833
- Have you fuck!
- I know I have, man. Don't fucking trip.
1105
01:02:24,917 --> 01:02:27,792
You're the one who's trippin'.
You've got a fucking kiddy's lung.
1106
01:02:27,875 --> 01:02:30,250
Me, man, I was doin' buckets, me,
1107
01:02:30,333 --> 01:02:32,625
when you was a twitch
in your father's nutsack.
1108
01:02:32,708 --> 01:02:34,375
- Not at all.
- Serious.
1109
01:02:34,458 --> 01:02:35,875
- Not at all!
- Serious!
1110
01:02:35,958 --> 01:02:38,042
- What you on about?
- What you on about, man?
1111
01:02:38,125 --> 01:02:40,125
- What you on about?
- What the fuck you on about?
1112
01:02:40,208 --> 01:02:42,208
- What you on about?
- I knows what I'm on about.
1113
01:02:42,292 --> 01:02:44,708
- What you on about?
- He's been smoking longer than you.
1114
01:02:44,792 --> 01:02:47,333
- What the fuck you on about?
- What you on about?
1115
01:02:50,250 --> 01:02:52,667
- Your mother! Your mother!
- What you on about?
1116
01:02:52,750 --> 01:02:54,042
You bumbaclaat!
1117
01:02:54,125 --> 01:02:55,625
(All laughing)
1118
01:02:55,708 --> 01:02:58,083
(On car stereo) ♪ Shine on
1119
01:02:58,167 --> 01:03:03,417
♪ Let the light of love
grow stronger, oh
1120
01:03:03,500 --> 01:03:05,333
♪ Shine on
1121
01:03:06,083 --> 01:03:09,875
♪ You're the sun in my heart,
a flame in the dark
1122
01:03:09,958 --> 01:03:15,958
♪ So let the light of love shine on... ♪
1123
01:03:16,042 --> 01:03:18,750
Fuckin' hell, mate.
It's like a fucking video game, this.
1124
01:03:18,833 --> 01:03:20,625
Fucking lights and shit everywhere.
1125
01:03:24,833 --> 01:03:27,125
- (Whooping)
- Yeah, yeah, yeah!
1126
01:03:27,208 --> 01:03:29,958
I know you gonna dig this!
1127
01:03:30,042 --> 01:03:33,250
Oh, yeah, baby.
Come on, come on.
1128
01:03:33,333 --> 01:03:35,125
- Come on!
- Yeah, come on. Let's fucking...
1129
01:03:35,208 --> 01:03:38,208
(Cheering and whooping)
1130
01:03:38,292 --> 01:03:41,125
Now I'm gonna take you on a guided tour
of the club casualties.
1131
01:03:41,208 --> 01:03:45,083
- So, come on!
- Right, let's do it!
1132
01:03:45,167 --> 01:03:47,625
We're all getting laid tonight!
1133
01:03:47,708 --> 01:03:51,375
Oh! Oh! Oh...
1134
01:03:51,458 --> 01:03:54,375
- Oh!
- Fuckin' hell! It's Dynasty!
1135
01:03:54,458 --> 01:03:57,875
(Dance music playing)
1136
01:03:57,958 --> 01:04:00,750
Oh, fuck me, man.
Roni Size is the fucking bollocks!
1137
01:04:00,833 --> 01:04:02,833
That's exactly
what I was gonna say, man.
1138
01:04:05,500 --> 01:04:07,667
- Are you fuckin' takin' the piss, man?
- What?
1139
01:04:09,000 --> 01:04:10,833
Are you fuckin'
takin' the piss out of me?
1140
01:04:10,917 --> 01:04:13,417
Where the fuck's
this comin' from, man?
1141
01:04:13,500 --> 01:04:18,500
Sometimes, man, I look in your eyes,
and all I see is fucking resentment.
1142
01:04:21,250 --> 01:04:25,583
(All) ♪ That's paranoia!
1143
01:04:25,667 --> 01:04:27,833
- ♪ Mmm
- ♪ Mmm ♪
1144
01:04:27,917 --> 01:04:31,375
- So, who do you know, then, brah?
- Every motherfucker.
1145
01:04:31,458 --> 01:04:35,042
St Mellons crew, Llanrumney posse,
Trowbridge crew, docks posse.
1146
01:04:35,125 --> 01:04:37,292
Oh, brah, I got cousins
down the docks, man.
1147
01:04:37,375 --> 01:04:38,500
- Down the docks?
- Yeah.
1148
01:04:38,583 --> 01:04:41,583
Go on, Uncle Paul!
That's proper ganja...!
1149
01:04:41,667 --> 01:04:43,917
That's the fucking motherland.
You know what I'm ea yin'?
1150
01:04:44,000 --> 01:04:47,125
(Dance music playing)
1151
01:05:06,042 --> 01:05:08,625
- All right, babe?
- What the fuck are you doing to me?
1152
01:05:08,708 --> 01:05:11,417
- What are you talking about?
- Talking to that bloke in the club.
1153
01:05:11,500 --> 01:05:14,458
- You kept on touching his chest.
- Did I? Who?
1154
01:05:14,542 --> 01:05:15,958
You fucking know who.
1155
01:05:17,125 --> 01:05:19,125
Right in front of me as well.
1156
01:05:19,208 --> 01:05:22,083
You know, it scares me to imagine
what you're like when I'm not around.
1157
01:05:22,167 --> 01:05:24,958
Yeah, this all sounds a bit familiar,
really, doesn't it, lovely?
1158
01:05:25,042 --> 01:05:27,958
Yeah, well, how about
a little bit of consideration, eh?
1159
01:05:28,042 --> 01:05:31,375
I don't want you talking like that
with other boys. It affects me.
1160
01:05:31,458 --> 01:05:34,833
Look, Koop, I really can't be pissed
with this one again tonight.
1161
01:05:34,917 --> 01:05:38,625
I haven't done anything wrong.
You're just being paranoid.
1162
01:05:38,708 --> 01:05:40,417
Sort it out, for fuck's sake.
1163
01:05:40,500 --> 01:05:43,750
Would you like it if I was flirting with
a girl and I kept on touching her chest?
1164
01:05:43,833 --> 01:05:45,875
- Would you?
- Only if she had better tits than me.
1165
01:05:45,958 --> 01:05:47,125
No, fuck off, Nin.
1166
01:05:48,333 --> 01:05:50,208
Don't give me that shit.
1167
01:05:50,292 --> 01:05:52,042
You always... You always...
1168
01:05:53,000 --> 01:05:55,083
You're always touching people,
aren't you?
1169
01:05:55,167 --> 01:05:58,417
But that doesn't mean to say I'm flirting
with anyone, for fuck's sake!
1170
01:06:00,000 --> 01:06:03,208
I don't know how much more
reassurance I can give you.
1171
01:06:03,292 --> 01:06:04,958
What do I have to do?
1172
01:06:06,667 --> 01:06:08,083
Don't you trust me?
1173
01:06:09,833 --> 01:06:11,917
Answer me! Don't you trust me, Koop?
1174
01:06:13,792 --> 01:06:14,792
(Sighs) Fuck.
1175
01:06:16,750 --> 01:06:20,208
Yeah, man, Star Wars
is definitely about drug culture, man.
1176
01:06:20,292 --> 01:06:22,500
There's no fucking question.
It has to be, man.
1177
01:06:22,583 --> 01:06:24,375
You're telling me, And.
You're telling me.
1178
01:06:24,458 --> 01:06:27,042
I mean, what was Jabba smoking
in that big glass pipe?
1179
01:06:27,125 --> 01:06:29,542
- Come on. What are we, thick?
- It was fucking opium.
1180
01:06:29,625 --> 01:06:30,667
Course it was opium!
1181
01:06:30,750 --> 01:06:33,833
Did you see his tongue, man?
And that fucking tail.
1182
01:06:33,917 --> 01:06:35,958
Listen, listen. Han Solo, yeah?
1183
01:06:36,042 --> 01:06:38,542
He's got a smuggling compartment
in the Millennium Falcon.
1184
01:06:38,625 --> 01:06:42,667
He's only an intergalactic smack dealer.
Fucking gets up there!
1185
01:06:42,750 --> 01:06:45,667
Listen, Yoda, man, as well. He's been
coming down for about 500 years.
1186
01:06:45,750 --> 01:06:47,833
- Course he is.
- He's fucked, the poor bastard.
1187
01:06:47,917 --> 01:06:51,125
He's used to be really tall and handsome,
like, you know...
1188
01:06:51,208 --> 01:06:52,458
- What, like Chewbacca?
- Yeah.
1189
01:06:52,542 --> 01:06:54,958
- (Howling) I can't do it.
- (Trilling)
1190
01:06:55,042 --> 01:06:57,792
- Now he's fucking, like, two foot high...
- Yeah.
1191
01:06:57,875 --> 01:07:00,000
...and fucking pointed tabs,
white hair and hooves.
1192
01:07:00,083 --> 01:07:02,583
Hooves. That's what I was gonna say.
The fucking hooves, man.
1193
01:07:02,667 --> 01:07:06,042
What a comedown. What about the emperor?
The fucking emperor.
1194
01:07:06,125 --> 01:07:08,208
The king crackhead
of the galaxy, yeah?
1195
01:07:08,292 --> 01:07:10,292
He's got so much fucking hard cash
1196
01:07:10,375 --> 01:07:13,375
from selling crack
to space junkies, yeah,
1197
01:07:13,458 --> 01:07:15,333
he's only gone and built
his own planet.
1198
01:07:15,417 --> 01:07:17,500
You know what I mean?
On drug money.
1199
01:07:17,583 --> 01:07:20,042
- The fucking Death Star.
- The Death Star!
1200
01:07:20,125 --> 01:07:23,833
And he's sat in there going like,
"Come on, more power! More power!"
1201
01:07:23,917 --> 01:07:25,125
And Yoda's like...
1202
01:07:25,208 --> 01:07:27,667
Yeah, yeah, and he's chilled out, man.
1203
01:07:27,750 --> 01:07:30,667
- Yeah, a bit zooted, all that.
- Be creative, yeah, man.
1204
01:07:30,750 --> 01:07:32,458
(Dance music playing softly)
1205
01:07:34,458 --> 01:07:35,667
What was I talking about?
1206
01:07:37,000 --> 01:07:38,667
- Huh?
- What was I talking about?
1207
01:07:39,875 --> 01:07:41,458
- What, just now?
- Yeah.
1208
01:07:44,917 --> 01:07:47,250
- Your dad.
- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
1209
01:07:48,042 --> 01:07:50,792
Yeah, well, I'll tell you what, mate,
the thing about my old boy is,
1210
01:07:50,875 --> 01:07:54,167
is that I love him and that,
and he's always been there for me,
1211
01:07:54,250 --> 01:07:58,417
and always spoke to me on my own level
and that when I was a kid, yeah?
1212
01:08:00,208 --> 01:08:03,875
But I'll tell you what,
I'm really worried about him.
1213
01:08:05,167 --> 01:08:08,042
- You're worried about him? Why, man?
- Yeah.
1214
01:08:08,125 --> 01:08:09,125
Why?
1215
01:08:10,958 --> 01:08:14,583
He thinks I'm two identical twins
pretending to be the same person.
1216
01:08:15,167 --> 01:08:16,542
Keeps calling me Leon.
1217
01:08:18,458 --> 01:08:20,250
(Sighs) Fucking hell.
1218
01:08:21,500 --> 01:08:24,292
Yeah, mate. And I'll tell you what...
1219
01:08:26,167 --> 01:08:28,583
He's getting worse in there as well.
1220
01:08:28,667 --> 01:08:32,208
Those drugs they're giving him,
they're fucking his head up, mate.
1221
01:08:34,625 --> 01:08:35,625
Fuck.
1222
01:08:38,417 --> 01:08:40,958
- So, what, he thinks you're two people?
- Yeah.
1223
01:08:42,500 --> 01:08:43,750
- Fuck.
- Yeah.
1224
01:08:44,833 --> 01:08:46,958
Fair play, man.
That's pretty west, innit?
1225
01:08:49,125 --> 01:08:53,125
Yeah, but you know, sanity, man,
how do you define that?
1226
01:08:53,208 --> 01:08:55,833
You know, how do you define sanity,
you know?
1227
01:08:55,917 --> 01:08:58,542
Who's to say that, you know,
the people that, you know,
1228
01:08:58,625 --> 01:09:00,208
are supposed to be mad, you know,
1229
01:09:00,292 --> 01:09:02,708
who's to say that they're,
you know, just not tapped into
1230
01:09:02,792 --> 01:09:05,250
a higher sensory perception
or something, you know?
1231
01:09:05,333 --> 01:09:07,875
Into, you know,
a different kind of universe.
1232
01:09:07,958 --> 01:09:10,542
They're way ahead, you know?
You know?
1233
01:09:10,625 --> 01:09:12,417
- And we just haven't caught up yet.
- Yeah.
1234
01:09:12,500 --> 01:09:13,667
Listen to this.
1235
01:09:14,750 --> 01:09:17,750
The emperor
wants to control outer space.
1236
01:09:18,833 --> 01:09:22,167
Yoda wants to explore inner space.
1237
01:09:23,917 --> 01:09:27,750
That's the fundamental difference
between the good and the bad sides
1238
01:09:27,833 --> 01:09:28,958
of the Force.
1239
01:09:29,042 --> 01:09:30,750
(Dance music gets louder)
1240
01:09:35,208 --> 01:09:38,208
- Shit. Shit.
- Fuck. I mean, fuck.
1241
01:09:39,958 --> 01:09:41,625
Fuck's sake, man.
1242
01:09:41,708 --> 01:09:45,500
I just don't know where it comes from
sometimes, And. It frightens me.
1243
01:09:45,583 --> 01:09:47,583
(Rapping)♪ There's not a problem
that I can't fix
1244
01:09:47,667 --> 01:09:49,333
♪ Cos I can do it in the mix
1245
01:09:49,417 --> 01:09:51,643
♪ And if your man gives you trouble,
just you move out on the double
1246
01:09:51,667 --> 01:09:53,625
♪ And you don't let it trouble
your brain
1247
01:09:53,708 --> 01:09:56,458
♪ Cos away goes trouble
down the drain
1248
01:09:57,833 --> 01:09:59,417
♪ Said away goes trouble
1249
01:09:59,500 --> 01:10:00,750
♪ Down the drain... ♪
1250
01:10:01,542 --> 01:10:06,792
I want ETs to abduct me
from Planet Cardiff.
1251
01:10:06,875 --> 01:10:10,042
Come on, you fuckers! Let's go!
1252
01:10:16,042 --> 01:10:18,375
You can't blame them
for not coming, though.
1253
01:10:18,458 --> 01:10:22,958
I mean, they've only gotta fucking
check out the ten o'clock news,
1254
01:10:23,042 --> 01:10:27,417
and check out all the murders
and diseases and wars...
1255
01:10:28,292 --> 01:10:29,458
Jack Docherty.
1256
01:10:37,667 --> 01:10:38,667
Oh!
1257
01:10:40,250 --> 01:10:43,792
Take me to a world
where the drugs are free,
1258
01:10:44,792 --> 01:10:47,500
the clubs have no gravity,
1259
01:10:47,583 --> 01:10:50,750
and every shag
guarantees an orgasm!
1260
01:10:50,833 --> 01:10:53,792
Yeah! Two orgasms!
1261
01:10:53,875 --> 01:10:55,458
- Yeah!
- Yes!
1262
01:10:55,542 --> 01:10:58,208
He's a genius. Um, Socrates.
1263
01:10:58,292 --> 01:11:01,000
- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Yeah? And he's giving it all that.
1264
01:11:01,083 --> 01:11:03,167
And they're going,
"What? What, Socrates, man?
1265
01:11:03,250 --> 01:11:05,167
You're off your tits!
What you talking about?"
1266
01:11:05,250 --> 01:11:07,417
You know. They fucking thought
he was mad, you know.
1267
01:11:07,500 --> 01:11:11,625
And this guy, you know, he... he sped up
evolution of mankind, you know.
1268
01:11:11,708 --> 01:11:14,083
He fuckin', you know...
He was a genius, this guy.
1269
01:11:14,167 --> 01:11:16,208
They thought he was crazy.
You know what I mean?
1270
01:11:16,292 --> 01:11:18,167
I mean,
they lock these people up, right,
1271
01:11:18,250 --> 01:11:19,833
but they should let 'em out, man.
1272
01:11:19,917 --> 01:11:22,625
They should fuckin' put these people
in Parliament and that.
1273
01:11:22,708 --> 01:11:25,042
You know what I mean?
Fucking put them in Parliament.
1274
01:11:25,125 --> 01:11:26,625
They're talking sense, these people.
1275
01:11:26,708 --> 01:11:30,833
Put your dad on that fucking chair
in Parliament and listen to that man!
1276
01:11:30,917 --> 01:11:33,125
- You know? Deal with that!
- You know what I mean?
1277
01:11:33,208 --> 01:11:34,625
- You know what I mean?
- Yeah!
1278
01:11:34,708 --> 01:11:36,292
Fuckin' mad. Bollocks.
1279
01:11:36,375 --> 01:11:40,000
I mean, you know, we're not in hospital
and that, but we're not normal, are we?
1280
01:11:41,667 --> 01:11:42,708
(Sniggers)
1281
01:11:42,792 --> 01:11:45,125
- Look. Are we fuck.
- Are we fuck.
1282
01:11:48,958 --> 01:11:52,542
Oh, my God. Look at your eyes.
Look at your eyes. You're fucked.
1283
01:11:52,625 --> 01:11:54,958
You're so... Look at your...
Look at that!
1284
01:11:55,042 --> 01:11:56,708
- Oh, my God!
- Fuck.
1285
01:11:56,792 --> 01:11:59,500
- Oh, my God! Oh, my... No!
- You're fucked! You're fucked!
1286
01:11:59,583 --> 01:12:00,625
You're so fucked!
1287
01:12:00,708 --> 01:12:02,083
- No, no.
- And look at me.
1288
01:12:02,167 --> 01:12:05,250
Oh, you're f...
No, I'm all right. No, I'm all right.
1289
01:12:05,958 --> 01:12:08,250
- I'm fine. I feel fine.
- I'm all right. Yeah, fuck it.
1290
01:12:08,333 --> 01:12:10,125
- Little bit tired. I'm all right.
- Yeah.
1291
01:12:10,208 --> 01:12:12,417
- Morning. Morning!
- Morning.
1292
01:12:12,500 --> 01:12:14,167
- Morning. Nurse?
- (Whistling)
1293
01:12:14,250 --> 01:12:15,750
- Nurse!
- I need a piss pot.
1294
01:12:15,833 --> 01:12:19,083
- I need a piss pot and a pan.
- And a... And a brush.
1295
01:12:19,167 --> 01:12:21,750
- And a brush. And a doctor.
- And some Häagen-Dazs.
1296
01:12:21,833 --> 01:12:24,208
- And some...
- And a... And a ho!
1297
01:12:24,292 --> 01:12:26,333
- Fuck it. Bring me a ho.
- Bring me all that shit!
1298
01:12:26,417 --> 01:12:29,500
- We gonna eat tonight!
- I need a normal doctor.
1299
01:12:29,583 --> 01:12:30,958
Cos I'm fucked!
1300
01:12:37,417 --> 01:12:38,583
I'm fucked.
1301
01:12:40,833 --> 01:12:42,208
Are you my best mate?
1302
01:12:43,125 --> 01:12:46,833
Yes. I am your best mate.
1303
01:12:48,167 --> 01:12:52,417
So if I told you a secret,
you wouldn't tell anybody else?
1304
01:12:53,333 --> 01:12:55,500
No. Definitely not.
1305
01:13:03,542 --> 01:13:05,250
I can voluntarily...
1306
01:13:06,417 --> 01:13:08,875
...perform a fanny fart
at any time.
1307
01:13:16,458 --> 01:13:18,208
That is disgusting.
1308
01:13:19,292 --> 01:13:21,792
- Do you want me to show you?
- No.
1309
01:13:22,583 --> 01:13:26,125
But... I think that makes me
love you more.
1310
01:13:27,542 --> 01:13:29,333
(Door creaks open)
1311
01:13:32,208 --> 01:13:36,833
Now we've reached the hour
of spliff politics.
1312
01:13:36,917 --> 01:13:41,625
It's the time of the night
when everyone knows who's got a spliff
1313
01:13:41,708 --> 01:13:44,000
and in which direction it's going.
1314
01:13:44,083 --> 01:13:45,500
See Casey in the hood?
1315
01:13:47,042 --> 01:13:50,625
He doesn't know Herbie,
the kid skinning up next to him.
1316
01:13:53,208 --> 01:13:57,250
But to get a toke, he's got to start up
some bullshit conversation
1317
01:13:57,333 --> 01:14:00,167
and keep it going
until he gets passed the spliff.
1318
01:14:00,250 --> 01:14:03,417
Smells like soap bar to me.
Can't fault a bit of solid.
1319
01:14:03,500 --> 01:14:07,250
Now look at Herbie's face.
He knows what's up.
1320
01:14:07,333 --> 01:14:10,083
He's just hoping
Casey will run out of steam
1321
01:14:10,167 --> 01:14:13,708
so that he can pass the spliff
to his mate Felix.
1322
01:14:15,292 --> 01:14:17,708
But Casey's determined
to keep on going.
1323
01:14:17,792 --> 01:14:19,333
I grows my own shit too.
1324
01:14:19,417 --> 01:14:21,667
He's gotta be clever to get in there.
1325
01:14:21,750 --> 01:14:23,750
Just a few more laps to go.
1326
01:14:23,833 --> 01:14:27,208
Casey is doing well.
He's using all his best anecdotes.
1327
01:14:27,292 --> 01:14:30,750
And Herbie now seems quite engaged
in the conversation.
1328
01:14:30,833 --> 01:14:32,417
Felix is trying to get acknowledged.
1329
01:14:32,500 --> 01:14:34,583
Yeah, man. Fuckin' homegrown.
1330
01:14:36,708 --> 01:14:37,750
Um...
1331
01:14:39,208 --> 01:14:41,333
Yeah, man,
that homegrown shit's good, man.
1332
01:14:41,417 --> 01:14:42,708
But it's not working.
1333
01:14:42,792 --> 01:14:44,542
Ah, I just remembered, man.
1334
01:14:45,583 --> 01:14:48,375
Millsy's coming down next week
with some Thai.
1335
01:14:48,458 --> 01:14:50,000
We'll go out and hoof it, man.
1336
01:14:50,083 --> 01:14:52,625
Wow! Look at Casey's face.
1337
01:14:53,750 --> 01:14:56,833
Now it looks like it's all been
a waste of time and energy.
1338
01:14:56,917 --> 01:14:59,458
- Millsy? Millsy from Roath?
- Yeah.
1339
01:14:59,542 --> 01:15:00,625
But he counters.
1340
01:15:00,708 --> 01:15:02,583
Oh, I knows Millsy
from down Silhouettes.
1341
01:15:02,667 --> 01:15:05,083
It's neck and neck here
at the last lap.
1342
01:15:05,167 --> 01:15:07,750
- Hello, my little space kitten.
- Fuckin' hell!
1343
01:15:07,833 --> 01:15:10,375
- Give us a toke on that.
- Boomshanka!
1344
01:15:10,458 --> 01:15:12,417
(Musical flourish plays)
1345
01:15:12,500 --> 01:15:13,625
An interception!
1346
01:15:16,125 --> 01:15:18,125
But that's always
the chance you take.
1347
01:15:19,375 --> 01:15:20,417
(Door closes)
1348
01:15:20,500 --> 01:15:24,417
(Lulu) Round and round the garden,
like a teddy bear.
1349
01:15:25,708 --> 01:15:26,917
Who's the teddy bear?
1350
01:15:29,125 --> 01:15:33,000
- One step, two steps...
- Don't tickle me. Don't tickle me.
1351
01:15:33,083 --> 01:15:34,625
- Seriously.
- I'm not going to.
1352
01:15:34,708 --> 01:15:36,958
- You are.
- I'm not gonna tickle you. I promise.
1353
01:15:37,042 --> 01:15:39,000
- Come here.
- Where's your hand going?
1354
01:15:39,083 --> 01:15:41,250
I'm not gonna tickle you.
I promise.
1355
01:15:41,333 --> 01:15:43,417
(Dance music playing softly)
1356
01:15:44,458 --> 01:15:46,875
(Lulu) Please kiss me. Come on.
1357
01:15:46,958 --> 01:15:50,917
(Jip) I don't know whether I'm reading
this wrongly because I'm off my tits,
1358
01:15:51,000 --> 01:15:53,000
but does she want me to kiss her?
1359
01:15:53,083 --> 01:15:55,417
(Lulu) I'm gonna have to make
the first move.
1360
01:15:55,500 --> 01:15:57,625
He's probably more nervous
than I am.
1361
01:15:57,708 --> 01:15:59,708
(Jip) I want to, but I'm scared.
1362
01:16:01,167 --> 01:16:04,917
(Lulu) if I've got this wrong,
it'll be so humiliating.
1363
01:16:09,208 --> 01:16:11,792
(Dance music building)
1364
01:16:29,750 --> 01:16:30,875
(Music stops)
1365
01:16:30,958 --> 01:16:33,125
Yeah, it's like Vader, man,
you know.
1366
01:16:33,208 --> 01:16:35,458
Bongin' really hard
with a chest like that.
1367
01:16:35,542 --> 01:16:36,542
(Chuckles)
1368
01:16:39,917 --> 01:16:43,875
And... And, um, R2-D2,
when... when he's...
1369
01:16:43,958 --> 01:16:45,500
Remember that? And when...
1370
01:16:46,917 --> 01:16:48,708
You know... Oh, fuck it.
1371
01:16:58,625 --> 01:17:00,292
You're a waste of time.
1372
01:17:00,375 --> 01:17:01,625
(Dialogue rewinds)
1373
01:17:01,708 --> 01:17:05,042
Jip, just relax, man.
Chill. It's no big deal.
1374
01:17:07,583 --> 01:17:10,542
I don't understand why
you can't have sex with me.
1375
01:17:11,083 --> 01:17:12,458
Sex with me.
1376
01:17:13,458 --> 01:17:16,125
What's wrong? Are you OK?
1377
01:17:16,750 --> 01:17:18,417
I've never had that happen to me before.
1378
01:17:26,333 --> 01:17:28,583
- (Sighs)
- There's no rush.
1379
01:17:31,083 --> 01:17:33,708
Don't be nervous.
You're with me, remember?
1380
01:17:36,417 --> 01:17:38,875
Yeah. OK. I'm sorry.
1381
01:17:39,500 --> 01:17:41,333
And don't apologise.
1382
01:17:43,583 --> 01:17:45,500
Come here. Come here.
1383
01:17:52,875 --> 01:17:54,083
(Jip exhales)
1384
01:17:58,292 --> 01:18:01,667
(Jip) Well, what goes up
must come down,
1385
01:18:01,750 --> 01:18:04,667
and down, and down.
1386
01:18:04,750 --> 01:18:07,292
Everyone looks ill
at the end of the night.
1387
01:18:07,375 --> 01:18:11,958
We've all lost the power of speech,
desperately avoiding eye contact.
1388
01:18:12,042 --> 01:18:15,208
Your new soul mate that you've been
talking cod shit to for the past five hours
1389
01:18:15,292 --> 01:18:18,917
about the story of creation
or the fourth Star Wars film
1390
01:18:19,000 --> 01:18:20,875
is now a complete stranger.
1391
01:18:20,958 --> 01:18:22,708
You can't even look him in the eye.
1392
01:18:22,792 --> 01:18:25,750
The only thing you've got
in common now is paranoia.
1393
01:18:25,833 --> 01:18:28,042
It's coming through the walls, man.
1394
01:18:28,125 --> 01:18:30,750
The children of ecstasy
aren't safe any more.
1395
01:18:30,833 --> 01:18:35,292
We're no longer all together as one,
but separate mental patients
1396
01:18:35,375 --> 01:18:37,792
that yearn to be ejected
out of this poisoned atmosphere
1397
01:18:37,875 --> 01:18:41,000
to a warm bed
and friendly therapist.
1398
01:18:41,083 --> 01:18:43,000
Reality's on her way.
1399
01:18:43,083 --> 01:18:44,542
Where am I?
1400
01:18:44,625 --> 01:18:46,833
What have I done?
1401
01:18:46,917 --> 01:18:48,625
Was it worth it?
1402
01:18:48,708 --> 01:18:51,625
And by the way,
what the fuck happened here?
1403
01:18:52,792 --> 01:18:55,542
All you have to look forward to now
is unconsciousness,
1404
01:18:56,583 --> 01:18:58,375
but you can never sleep.
1405
01:18:59,375 --> 01:19:02,375
(♪ Orbital: "Belfast")
1406
01:19:44,375 --> 01:19:47,375
(Song continues)
1407
01:20:29,000 --> 01:20:30,000
(Chuckling)
1408
01:20:30,042 --> 01:20:32,458
- (Lulu imitates fart)
- Oh, feck.
1409
01:20:32,542 --> 01:20:34,417
(Koop) Bonk, is it?
1410
01:20:37,708 --> 01:20:38,708
Hot, is it?
1411
01:20:38,750 --> 01:20:42,708
(Jip) It's time you realised who wears
the fuckin' curry-stained trousers
1412
01:20:42,792 --> 01:20:44,083
in this relation-shit.
1413
01:20:44,167 --> 01:20:46,125
- (Lulu) Curry, is it?
- (Jip) Curry, Karen.
1414
01:20:46,208 --> 01:20:48,083
- Is it? Curry, is it, Karen?
- Curry, innit?
1415
01:20:48,167 --> 01:20:51,042
- (Jip) Relation-shit.
- (Lulu) Curry, is it?
1416
01:20:52,083 --> 01:20:54,917
(Jip) Relation-shit.
(Both) Relation-shit!
1417
01:20:55,000 --> 01:20:56,042
(Laughing)
1418
01:20:56,125 --> 01:20:58,625
- Beep! Beep!
- (Laughing continues)
1419
01:20:59,667 --> 01:21:03,167
- (Jip) Fancy a piece of your dad, is it?
- I'm a sensitive woman!
1420
01:21:03,250 --> 01:21:06,000
- Minking slapper!
- Boop!
1421
01:21:06,083 --> 01:21:08,833
(Lulu) Tone, put down that ninja star!
1422
01:21:08,917 --> 01:21:11,792
(Koop) Is it? Is it?
(Jip) Bumping and blimping.
1423
01:21:11,875 --> 01:21:14,333
(Koop) Give my fucking ninja star back,
or else I'll fuck you
1424
01:21:14,417 --> 01:21:16,167
with my fuckin' nunchakus!
1425
01:21:16,250 --> 01:21:19,458
(Woman) Moff?
I hardly recognised you.
1426
01:21:19,542 --> 01:21:20,542
Who's that?
1427
01:21:23,375 --> 01:21:24,375
Reality?
1428
01:21:25,542 --> 01:21:27,500
Reality, is that you?
1429
01:21:27,583 --> 01:21:31,458
- Don't fuckin' wind me up.
- Moff, it's me, honestly.
1430
01:21:31,542 --> 01:21:33,250
Where the fuck have you been?
1431
01:21:33,333 --> 01:21:36,292
Reality, it's all... It's all gone
pear-shaped, mate. I don't...
1432
01:21:38,583 --> 01:21:42,042
I don't trust anybody in this room right
now, and they're my best fuckin' friends.
1433
01:21:42,125 --> 01:21:44,167
I mean, Reality,
what the fuck is going on?
1434
01:21:44,250 --> 01:21:46,417
What's... What's happening to me,
for fuck's sake?
1435
01:21:46,500 --> 01:21:49,792
Moff, you've hammered it
too much for too long.
1436
01:21:49,875 --> 01:21:52,750
Knock the drugs on the head.
Clear out.
1437
01:21:52,833 --> 01:21:54,250
We can work together.
1438
01:22:19,542 --> 01:22:22,542
(Karen) You're a waste of time.
(Jip) Go away.
1439
01:22:23,667 --> 01:22:26,125
Come on, stay with her,
stay with her.
1440
01:22:27,083 --> 01:22:30,458
(Karen) I don't understand
why you can't have sex with me.
1441
01:22:30,542 --> 01:22:31,667
(Jip) Oh, shut up!
1442
01:22:34,333 --> 01:22:36,542
(Jip) Come on, come on, Jip.
Don't be afraid.
1443
01:22:36,625 --> 01:22:39,083
(Karen) I've never had that
happen to me before.
1444
01:22:39,167 --> 01:22:42,083
(Jip) Go on. Go with her.
Go with her. Move her.
1445
01:22:42,167 --> 01:22:43,500
Move with her.
1446
01:22:43,583 --> 01:22:44,625
(Lulu) Go with him.
1447
01:22:51,417 --> 01:22:53,250
(Jip) Oh, look at her.
She's beautiful.
1448
01:22:54,000 --> 01:22:56,792
(Lulu) Hello, you.
(Jip) She's enjoying it.
1449
01:22:57,375 --> 01:22:58,542
(Lulu) Let it go.
1450
01:22:59,458 --> 01:23:01,250
(Jip) Come on,
feel what she's feeling.
1451
01:23:01,333 --> 01:23:02,583
(Lulu) Come on, let it go.
1452
01:23:02,667 --> 01:23:05,042
(Jip) You wanna be with her.
Go with it.
1453
01:23:05,125 --> 01:23:06,542
(Lulu) Let it go.
1454
01:23:07,500 --> 01:23:09,583
(Lulu) Let it go this time, Lu.
1455
01:23:16,208 --> 01:23:19,208
(Techno music playing)
1456
01:23:36,333 --> 01:23:39,333
(Reggae rap)
1457
01:23:41,750 --> 01:23:44,833
(Reggae rap continues)
1458
01:23:53,750 --> 01:23:55,292
♪ Ready
1459
01:23:55,375 --> 01:23:56,375
♪ Steady
1460
01:23:57,167 --> 01:24:00,417
- ♪ Go! Pow, pow! Pow, pow! Pow, pow!
- (Beeping)
1461
01:24:02,167 --> 01:24:03,667
(Gasps)
1462
01:24:04,375 --> 01:24:06,083
No! No! No!
1463
01:24:07,583 --> 01:24:10,417
Fuckin'... No fuckin' way!
1464
01:24:11,333 --> 01:24:13,042
Oh, for fuck's sake!
1465
01:24:13,750 --> 01:24:16,750
No, no. It was a fucking dream,
wasn't it?
1466
01:24:21,958 --> 01:24:23,125
Oi. Bitch!
1467
01:24:23,208 --> 01:24:24,625
(Koop grunts)
1468
01:24:26,125 --> 01:24:27,458
Wake up, bitch.
1469
01:24:28,250 --> 01:24:29,292
(Jip laughs)
1470
01:24:29,375 --> 01:24:30,625
- (Koop yawns)
- Come on.
1471
01:24:30,708 --> 01:24:32,500
- Oh, here he is.
- Yeah.
1472
01:24:32,583 --> 01:24:35,750
Kickin' chicken.
Ah, what's the news, baby pop?
1473
01:24:35,833 --> 01:24:38,375
(Laughs) Uh...
1474
01:24:38,458 --> 01:24:41,292
Life's amazing. Ah!
1475
01:24:41,375 --> 01:24:42,833
(Koop) Oh!
1476
01:24:42,917 --> 01:24:47,042
♪ Congratulations and celebrations
1477
01:24:47,125 --> 01:24:49,583
♪ Cool it, tune it, cool it, baby
1478
01:24:49,667 --> 01:24:51,250
♪ Cool it, babe ♪
1479
01:24:51,333 --> 01:24:52,833
(Both laugh)
1480
01:24:52,917 --> 01:24:55,583
Hey, hey! Welcome back
to the world of sex, mate.
1481
01:24:55,667 --> 01:24:58,750
Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!
1482
01:24:58,833 --> 01:25:03,000
Once more, I am a fucktioning
human being! One more time!
1483
01:25:03,083 --> 01:25:06,625
Look at him, ladies.
Live, ladies and gentlemen. He's a star!
1484
01:25:06,708 --> 01:25:07,792
(Humming)
1485
01:25:07,875 --> 01:25:11,958
Eh, eh, eh, what the fuck
was I worried about, man?
1486
01:25:12,042 --> 01:25:13,417
I told you, man, didn't I?
1487
01:25:13,500 --> 01:25:15,667
Overthinking of the stupid
little things, mate.
1488
01:25:15,750 --> 01:25:17,625
Mate, mate. Oh!
1489
01:25:17,708 --> 01:25:19,333
(Laughs)
1490
01:25:20,542 --> 01:25:23,625
That's the story of my life, man.
It's the story of my life.
1491
01:25:23,708 --> 01:25:27,208
- (Humming)
- Oi, oi. Oi.
1492
01:25:27,292 --> 01:25:28,375
Did she, uh...
1493
01:25:30,000 --> 01:25:31,625
- What?
- Did she, uh...
1494
01:25:33,083 --> 01:25:34,625
- What?
- You know.
1495
01:25:35,625 --> 01:25:37,667
(Laughs) What?
1496
01:25:37,750 --> 01:25:39,958
What we were talking about
the other day, mate.
1497
01:25:40,042 --> 01:25:41,875
- I'm not answering that, man.
- Go on.
1498
01:25:41,958 --> 01:25:44,792
No, no. That's disgusting.
No, I'm not telling you that.
1499
01:25:44,875 --> 01:25:46,458
- What?
- No, mate.
1500
01:25:46,542 --> 01:25:48,958
It's a personal thing
between two human beings.
1501
01:25:49,042 --> 01:25:51,125
- Fuck off.
- No, forget it.
1502
01:25:51,208 --> 01:25:54,625
- I'm not answering that question.
- Shut up. I'm your mate.
1503
01:25:55,833 --> 01:25:57,542
- Yeah.
- (Laughs)
1504
01:25:59,042 --> 01:26:00,667
- Big time!
- (Laughs)
1505
01:26:04,208 --> 01:26:06,875
- Oh!
- Go on with your bad self!
1506
01:26:06,958 --> 01:26:08,667
- Bitch!
- Bitch.
1507
01:26:08,750 --> 01:26:11,750
- (Posh accent) You dirty bitch.
- No, I'm telling you.
1508
01:26:11,833 --> 01:26:14,083
It has never happened to me
like that before.
1509
01:26:14,167 --> 01:26:17,167
I mean, I've had that, you know,
sort of release of pleasure,
1510
01:26:17,250 --> 01:26:18,292
but nothing like this.
1511
01:26:18,375 --> 01:26:21,625
I mean, it just came out of nowhere.
I didn't have to concentrate or anything.
1512
01:26:21,708 --> 01:26:25,250
And when it did, fuck me,
it was just like...
1513
01:26:25,333 --> 01:26:29,125
Ah! Ah! Ah!
1514
01:26:30,875 --> 01:26:33,125
Oh, it's the most amazing feeling.
1515
01:26:33,208 --> 01:26:34,875
Did your eyes go all blurry?
1516
01:26:34,958 --> 01:26:38,333
Blurry? I went fuckin' blind
for about ten minutes.
1517
01:26:38,417 --> 01:26:42,250
And then he started running his finger
all over my skin,
1518
01:26:42,333 --> 01:26:44,792
and it went all tingly,
and I was shaking all over.
1519
01:26:44,875 --> 01:26:46,958
Oh, it was fucking lush.
1520
01:26:47,917 --> 01:26:49,500
So...
1521
01:26:49,583 --> 01:26:52,625
(Opera-style singing)
♪ How big was his dick? ♪
1522
01:26:53,625 --> 01:26:55,667
Shut up. I can't tell you that.
1523
01:26:55,750 --> 01:26:56,750
This big.
1524
01:27:00,708 --> 01:27:02,417
But it fits like bric-a-brac.
1525
01:27:02,500 --> 01:27:05,583
It comes out from the root and then
goes off to the side with a little twist.
1526
01:27:05,667 --> 01:27:08,292
- Diversive.
- It certainly hit the spot.
1527
01:27:19,958 --> 01:27:22,542
Another kid dead
from taking ecstasy this week.
1528
01:27:24,167 --> 01:27:27,875
I don't know what possesses them
to take it in the first place.
1529
01:27:27,958 --> 01:27:31,083
Some children just don't have
the correct upbringing.
1530
01:27:31,167 --> 01:27:35,083
The parents must neglect them,
and they turn to drugs as an escape.
1531
01:27:35,167 --> 01:27:38,292
No discipline. No morality.
1532
01:27:40,083 --> 01:27:41,417
No respect.
1533
01:27:42,542 --> 01:27:44,458
I just don't understand
the youth of today.
1534
01:27:48,708 --> 01:27:51,833
(Dialogue rewinds) I just don't understand
the youth of today.
1535
01:27:51,917 --> 01:27:55,875
(Dialogue rewinds) I just don't understand
the youth of today.
1536
01:27:55,958 --> 01:27:57,625
(Laughs)
1537
01:27:59,042 --> 01:28:01,750
- Oh, spot on, mate. Spot on.
- No disci...
1538
01:28:01,833 --> 01:28:05,708
(Dialogue rewinds)
No discipline. No morality.
1539
01:28:05,792 --> 01:28:07,208
- No respect.
- (Mouths)
1540
01:28:07,292 --> 01:28:09,583
Some children just don't have
the correct upbringing.
1541
01:28:09,667 --> 01:28:12,625
(Dialogue rewinds) Some children
just don't have the correct upbringing.
1542
01:28:12,708 --> 01:28:15,458
- Another kid dead.
- Parents must neglect 'em and they...
1543
01:28:15,542 --> 01:28:17,792
- I just don't understand the youth of...
- No morality.
1544
01:28:17,875 --> 01:28:19,625
- Drugs as an escape.
- No discipline.
1545
01:28:19,708 --> 01:28:20,708
(Grunts)
1546
01:28:21,208 --> 01:28:24,042
Yeah! We're just some happy
fucking sitcom, ain't we?
1547
01:28:24,125 --> 01:28:28,417
Perfect life, perfect family,
perfect fucking dining table.
1548
01:28:28,500 --> 01:28:31,250
Well, give yourself
a round of applause. Please.
1549
01:28:31,333 --> 01:28:34,042
I swear sometimes
we're living on different planets,
1550
01:28:34,125 --> 01:28:37,792
because there is no fucking way
of communicating with you all.
1551
01:28:37,875 --> 01:28:40,375
Who the fuck
are you people anyway, eh?
1552
01:28:40,458 --> 01:28:42,500
Who the fuck are ya?
1553
01:28:51,042 --> 01:28:54,417
So, how was your weekend, Louise?
1554
01:28:54,500 --> 01:28:57,625
I had a really excellent time,
thanks, Auntie Violet.
1555
01:28:57,708 --> 01:28:58,750
What did you do?
1556
01:28:58,833 --> 01:29:02,375
{\an8}Um, we all went to a club
on Friday night,
1557
01:29:02,458 --> 01:29:06,167
{\an8}and then we went
to Connie's parents' house for a big party.
1558
01:29:06,250 --> 01:29:07,417
How did you get there?
1559
01:29:08,917 --> 01:29:10,458
{\an8}Jip drove us.
1560
01:29:11,500 --> 01:29:12,833
He hadn't been drinking?
1561
01:29:14,292 --> 01:29:17,583
{\an8}No, no.
No, he hadn't touched a drop.
1562
01:29:18,667 --> 01:29:20,125
And, uh... (Clears throat)
1563
01:29:21,750 --> 01:29:22,792
How is Jip?
1564
01:29:23,583 --> 01:29:26,500
{\an8}He's really, really well.
Thanks, Auntie Violet.
1565
01:29:28,500 --> 01:29:29,667
{\an8}(Chuckles)
1566
01:29:29,750 --> 01:29:31,667
{\an8}(Sombre music playing)
1567
01:29:40,417 --> 01:29:42,000
Dah!
1568
01:29:43,792 --> 01:29:44,875
What are they for?
1569
01:29:44,958 --> 01:29:47,500
They're for you,
because you deserve it.
1570
01:29:49,625 --> 01:29:50,958
And much, much more.
1571
01:29:53,917 --> 01:29:55,708
- (Kisses)
- Oh, Jip.
1572
01:29:58,583 --> 01:30:00,917
Oh, they're beautiful.
You shouldn't have.
1573
01:30:01,000 --> 01:30:02,625
Yeah, I should.
1574
01:30:02,708 --> 01:30:04,042
(Sighs)
1575
01:30:04,125 --> 01:30:06,500
- What's for dinner?
- Wait and see.
1576
01:30:06,583 --> 01:30:08,333
(Both chuckle)
1577
01:30:10,708 --> 01:30:12,708
(Sombre music continues)
1578
01:31:12,750 --> 01:31:15,750
(Sombre music continues)
1579
01:31:33,625 --> 01:31:35,625
(Music builds)
1580
01:31:54,625 --> 01:31:56,208
- (Music stops abruptly)
- Cunt.
1581
01:31:57,208 --> 01:31:59,042
{\an8}(Indistinct background chatter)
1582
01:32:08,958 --> 01:32:12,625
Listen. Listen, youse. Listen.
I really need to tell you something.
1583
01:32:14,458 --> 01:32:16,792
- I'm off the drugs big time.
- (All laugh)
1584
01:32:16,875 --> 01:32:18,750
No, I mean it. No.
1585
01:32:19,583 --> 01:32:21,208
I'm really being serious.
1586
01:32:22,833 --> 01:32:23,708
Listen to me.
1587
01:32:23,792 --> 01:32:28,417
I've had my head up my arse
for so long,
1588
01:32:28,500 --> 01:32:30,125
all I can do is... is think shit.
1589
01:32:30,208 --> 01:32:34,042
- (All laughing)
- No, listen to me. I'm... Listen.
1590
01:32:34,125 --> 01:32:37,875
I'm sick of feeling like the advert
for a methadone programme.
1591
01:32:37,958 --> 01:32:40,458
- I'm... I'm... It's...
- (Jip) Don't give me that shit.
1592
01:32:40,542 --> 01:32:42,333
The only reason
you're off the drugs, right,
1593
01:32:42,417 --> 01:32:43,937
is cos you've fuckin'
had 'em all, man.
1594
01:32:44,000 --> 01:32:45,333
(All laughing)
1595
01:32:45,417 --> 01:32:47,083
Future generations
of fuckin' dopeheads
1596
01:32:47,167 --> 01:32:50,792
are gonna have to toke your ashes
just to get high, do you know what I mean?
1597
01:32:50,875 --> 01:32:54,625
No, no, I'm really being serious,
yeah? I'm... I'm...
1598
01:32:54,708 --> 01:32:57,583
I'm coming apart at the seams, Jip.
I'm... (Sighs)
1599
01:32:58,625 --> 01:33:01,333
I'm... I'm dissolving. That's what's
happening to me. I'm... I'm...
1600
01:33:01,417 --> 01:33:04,125
I'm dissolving. I'm... I'm... I'm...
1601
01:33:04,208 --> 01:33:05,917
What I'm trying to say is, um...
1602
01:33:07,167 --> 01:33:10,542
Another couple of good pills,
and... and that's it for me.
1603
01:33:10,625 --> 01:33:13,667
It's good night, Vienna.
I mean, I really feel I'm gonna, uh...
1604
01:33:13,750 --> 01:33:17,083
Oh, it sounds like clubber's
comedown chorus to me, sweetheart.
1605
01:33:17,167 --> 01:33:18,542
(Koop) Yeah, you know it.
1606
01:33:18,625 --> 01:33:21,000
(Nina) It's not like
we're gonna be doing this forever.
1607
01:33:21,083 --> 01:33:23,833
I mean,
we'll all get bored of it eventually.
1608
01:33:26,167 --> 01:33:29,750
Hey, when a comedown
outweighs the good times,
1609
01:33:29,833 --> 01:33:31,500
you know the party's over, man.
1610
01:33:32,500 --> 01:33:34,542
- (Lulu) Mmm.
- I mean, Friday was a classic, yeah?
1611
01:33:34,625 --> 01:33:36,208
- Friday rocked.
- Fuckin' hell.
1612
01:33:36,292 --> 01:33:37,417
(Lulu) Classic.
1613
01:33:37,500 --> 01:33:40,792
But I have definitely
got to take some time out
1614
01:33:40,875 --> 01:33:43,042
to pick up the pieces, man,
and that's that.
1615
01:33:43,125 --> 01:33:44,375
Yeah, fair enough.
1616
01:33:44,458 --> 01:33:46,667
(Moff)And that's what...
That's what I'm saying to ya.
1617
01:33:46,750 --> 01:33:49,958
The honeymoon's over, Koop.
It's over.
1618
01:33:50,042 --> 01:33:52,250
It's not fucking worth it. I... I'm...
1619
01:33:53,167 --> 01:33:55,750
That's it for me. I've... I've had me lot.
I mean, you know...
1620
01:33:55,833 --> 01:33:58,167
Youse do what you gotta do,
but I'm fuckin'... That's it.
1621
01:33:58,250 --> 01:34:01,417
I mean, it's no more drugs for me.
That's my lot. That's it.
1622
01:34:08,375 --> 01:34:09,875
Drinks? Anyone?
1623
01:34:09,958 --> 01:34:10,958
Moff?
1624
01:34:12,375 --> 01:34:14,875
I'll have a pint of vodka, mate.
Just a little drop of Coke.
1625
01:34:16,000 --> 01:34:19,167
- Packet of Maltesers, yeah? Nice.
- (Lulu, laughing) Oh, no!
1626
01:34:19,250 --> 01:34:20,958
(Koop) Oh, dear!
1627
01:34:21,042 --> 01:34:24,917
(Lulu) I can't believe all this time
we've been going off with other people,
1628
01:34:25,000 --> 01:34:28,125
looking for the right person
and just not finding them.
1629
01:34:28,208 --> 01:34:29,833
I know. It's weird, innit?
1630
01:34:29,917 --> 01:34:34,125
I mean, anything could have happened
to change the events of last Friday.
1631
01:34:34,208 --> 01:34:37,292
And it'd just be normal now.
It'd be just like... We'd just be friends.
1632
01:34:37,375 --> 01:34:39,792
Oh, no! Don't say that.
1633
01:34:39,875 --> 01:34:43,917
You've always been there, but
I've just never thought of you that way.
1634
01:34:44,000 --> 01:34:45,920
And all of a sudden,
these past couple of months,
1635
01:34:46,000 --> 01:34:48,458
it's just been like, "Jip? Mmm."
1636
01:34:48,542 --> 01:34:49,625
(Jip) Mmm.
1637
01:34:51,500 --> 01:34:54,083
God, man. I know exactly
when this happened as well.
1638
01:34:54,167 --> 01:34:55,958
- I know exactly when this happened.
- When?
1639
01:34:56,042 --> 01:34:58,625
We were round your house, right?
It was about three weeks ago.
1640
01:34:58,708 --> 01:35:01,292
We were lying on your bed,
we were hugging, we were coming down.
1641
01:35:01,375 --> 01:35:04,083
- Remember?
- Oh, yeah! Coming down! Absolutely.
1642
01:35:04,167 --> 01:35:06,250
- We were just keeping it legal.
- Barely.
1643
01:35:06,333 --> 01:35:07,792
Yeah, barely.
1644
01:35:07,875 --> 01:35:11,333
Life is full of fucking surprises, man.
1645
01:35:11,417 --> 01:35:13,708
I mean, like, a minute ago,
I was thinking,
1646
01:35:13,792 --> 01:35:16,559
"Fuckin' hell. I'm never gonna have sex
again for the rest of my life."
1647
01:35:16,583 --> 01:35:19,042
And now I'm thinking,
"I'm having the best sex I've ever had
1648
01:35:19,125 --> 01:35:20,625
with somebody I've loved for years."
1649
01:35:20,708 --> 01:35:22,083
Do you know what I mean?
1650
01:35:22,167 --> 01:35:25,208
(Theatrical voice) And, darling,
it's only going to get better.
1651
01:35:25,292 --> 01:35:27,958
- Now kiss me.
- (Theatrical voice) Darling.
1652
01:35:28,042 --> 01:35:31,042
I'm going to fuck your brains out.
1653
01:35:31,125 --> 01:35:32,458
(Both laugh)
1654
01:35:37,208 --> 01:35:40,208
(Rousing music playing)
1655
01:35:45,208 --> 01:35:48,208
(Mellow dance music playing)
1656
01:35:54,417 --> 01:35:56,917
(Jip) Well, that's almost it
from me and my friends.
1657
01:35:57,000 --> 01:35:58,917
Back to mundane Monday.
1658
01:35:59,000 --> 01:36:03,792
I guess my point is, I think we're all
fucked-up in our own way, you know?
1659
01:36:03,875 --> 01:36:05,542
But we're all doing it together.
1660
01:36:05,625 --> 01:36:07,667
We're freestyling
on the buckled wheel of life,
1661
01:36:07,750 --> 01:36:10,292
trapped in a world
of internal dialogue.
1662
01:36:10,375 --> 01:36:11,958
Like Bill Hicks said,
1663
01:36:12,042 --> 01:36:15,542
"It's an insane world,
but I'm proud to be part of it."
1664
01:36:15,625 --> 01:36:17,083
(♪ Primal Scream: "Come Together")
1665
01:36:17,167 --> 01:36:18,958
♪ Come
1666
01:36:19,875 --> 01:36:24,250
♪ Together
as one
1667
01:36:25,875 --> 01:36:29,083
♪ Come
1668
01:36:30,167 --> 01:36:34,292
♪ Together
as one
1669
01:36:35,958 --> 01:36:39,125
♪ Come
1670
01:36:40,292 --> 01:36:44,792
♪ Together
as one
1671
01:36:46,167 --> 01:36:49,417
♪ Come
1672
01:36:50,500 --> 01:36:54,750
♪ Together
as one
1673
01:36:56,250 --> 01:36:57,417
♪ Come
1674
01:36:57,500 --> 01:36:58,958
♪ This is
a beautiful day
1675
01:37:00,125 --> 01:37:01,792
♪ It is a new day
1676
01:37:01,875 --> 01:37:05,208
♪ Together
as one
1677
01:37:06,542 --> 01:37:08,042
♪ Come
1678
01:37:08,125 --> 01:37:10,375
♪ This is
a beautiful day
1679
01:37:11,000 --> 01:37:12,208
♪ Together
1680
01:37:12,292 --> 01:37:13,375
♪ It is a new day
1681
01:37:13,458 --> 01:37:15,083
♪ As one
1682
01:37:16,042 --> 01:37:17,083
♪ We are together
1683
01:37:17,167 --> 01:37:20,000
♪ Come
1684
01:37:21,083 --> 01:37:24,208
- ♪ We are together
- ♪ Together as one
1685
01:37:24,292 --> 01:37:27,083
♪ We are unified
We are together
1686
01:37:27,167 --> 01:37:30,042
♪ Come
1687
01:37:31,500 --> 01:37:35,375
♪ Together
as one
1688
01:37:36,958 --> 01:37:39,958
♪ Cos together
we got power
1689
01:37:40,042 --> 01:37:41,958
♪ Apart
we got pow-wow
1690
01:37:42,042 --> 01:37:45,750
♪ Together
as one... ♪
1691
01:38:13,458 --> 01:38:15,708
(♪ CG Bolland:
"It Ain't Gonna Be Me")
1692
01:38:15,792 --> 01:38:16,833
♪ It ain't
gonna be me... ♪
1692
01:38:17,305 --> 01:39:17,917
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