1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Watch Online Movies and Series for FREE www.osdb.link/lm 2 00:00:14,630 --> 00:01:31,660 * 3 00:01:54,800 --> 00:04:35,430 * 4 00:04:35,430 --> 00:04:38,560 When will I find my queen? 5 00:04:38,560 --> 00:04:40,330 When will I find the one who is 6 00:04:40,330 --> 00:04:43,360 strong enough to accept my eternal gift? 7 00:04:43,360 --> 00:04:45,930 * 8 00:04:45,930 --> 00:04:48,900 Mistress, it is time. 9 00:04:48,900 --> 00:04:51,500 We must move swiftly. 10 00:04:51,500 --> 00:04:55,760 Like the vampire bats over the Transylvanian Alps 11 00:04:55,760 --> 00:04:57,700 we must fly. 12 00:04:57,700 --> 00:05:01,260 Like the wild caribou stampeding over the snows 13 00:05:01,260 --> 00:05:04,300 of the Kilimanjaro we must run. 14 00:05:04,300 --> 00:05:06,660 Like sands through the hourglass 15 00:05:06,660 --> 00:05:07,560 these are the days 16 00:05:07,560 --> 00:05:08,860 Yes, yes, yes! 17 00:05:08,860 --> 00:05:09,600 I understand. 18 00:05:09,600 --> 00:05:12,060 I get it. 19 00:05:12,060 --> 00:05:14,630 We must move on. 20 00:05:14,630 --> 00:05:28,260 * 21 00:05:28,260 --> 00:05:31,300 So, gentleman, here's to the success 22 00:05:31,300 --> 00:05:34,160 of the greatest venture of the millennium, 23 00:05:34,160 --> 00:05:37,760 the new and truly unsinkable, TITanic. 24 00:05:37,760 --> 00:05:41,200 Here, here. 25 00:05:41,200 --> 00:05:43,530 And now a toast to the important people. 26 00:05:43,530 --> 00:05:45,700 To Mr. Blatant, without whose money 27 00:05:45,700 --> 00:05:50,060 andwell, whose money the world's greatest ship 28 00:05:50,060 --> 00:05:51,730 would not have been built. 29 00:05:51,730 --> 00:05:53,630 Yes, yes. 30 00:05:53,630 --> 00:05:55,600 Good show, sir. 31 00:05:55,600 --> 00:05:57,430 Damn right. 32 00:05:57,430 --> 00:05:58,600 The only land lover with barnacles 33 00:05:58,600 --> 00:06:00,060 big enough to do it. 34 00:06:00,060 --> 00:06:02,300 And, of course, Mr. Smythe 35 00:06:02,300 --> 00:06:06,300 whose genius and steady hand designed and built her. 36 00:06:06,300 --> 00:06:08,730 So, gentlemen, are we ready to sail 37 00:06:08,730 --> 00:06:10,430 from New York to England? 38 00:06:10,430 --> 00:06:11,630 Aye aye. 39 00:06:11,630 --> 00:06:14,100 Smythe, why aren't you happy and cheerful, 40 00:06:14,100 --> 00:06:16,630 and kissing my ass like everybody else, why? 41 00:06:16,630 --> 00:06:18,430 Why? 42 00:06:18,430 --> 00:06:19,930 It's just that a couple things 43 00:06:19,930 --> 00:06:21,200 are bothering me. 44 00:06:21,200 --> 00:06:22,800 What on Earth could be bothering you? 45 00:06:22,800 --> 00:06:25,060 And don't give me any of that tortured artist crap. 46 00:06:25,060 --> 00:06:25,730 What is it? 47 00:06:25,730 --> 00:06:26,700 What, what? 48 00:06:26,700 --> 00:06:29,060 Yes, son, out with it. 49 00:06:29,060 --> 00:06:30,760 It has to do with some of the corners we cut 50 00:06:30,760 --> 00:06:33,900 in order to make room for the unforeseen extras. 51 00:06:33,900 --> 00:06:35,060 Which unforeseen extras? 52 00:06:35,060 --> 00:06:36,600 Which, which, which, which? 53 00:06:36,600 --> 00:06:39,660 Well, the solid gold steering wheel for one. 54 00:06:39,660 --> 00:06:41,130 Why not? 55 00:06:41,130 --> 00:06:43,330 Why shouldn't I have a little something extra? 56 00:06:43,330 --> 00:06:45,200 This is my last voyage. 57 00:06:45,200 --> 00:06:48,130 After this, I'm retarded. 58 00:06:48,130 --> 00:06:50,760 Well, due to that enormous and quite frankly, 59 00:06:50,760 --> 00:06:54,430 grossly unjustified expense, having a solid gold 60 00:06:54,430 --> 00:06:58,060 steering wheel, I was forced to make 61 00:06:58,060 --> 00:07:00,700 a few questionable changes in the construction 62 00:07:00,700 --> 00:07:01,960 of the Titanic. 63 00:07:01,960 --> 00:07:03,660 Oh, no, not the lifeboats. 64 00:07:03,660 --> 00:07:05,530 You didn't cut down on the lifeboats, did you? 65 00:07:05,530 --> 00:07:09,760 No, no, nothing so insidiously moronic as that. 66 00:07:09,760 --> 00:07:13,830 Well, what then? 67 00:07:13,830 --> 00:07:17,900 I was forced to finish portions of the ship's hull... 68 00:07:17,900 --> 00:07:18,730 with aluminum. 69 00:07:18,730 --> 00:07:20,630 Good God! 70 00:07:20,630 --> 00:07:22,630 That was the only material available. 71 00:07:22,630 --> 00:07:24,230 Well, what the hell is wrong with aluminum? 72 00:07:24,230 --> 00:07:26,100 It's a good, solid, flexible metal. 73 00:07:26,100 --> 00:07:27,730 Certainly a lot better than let's say plexiglass. 74 00:07:27,730 --> 00:07:28,860 Plexiglass is not a metal. 75 00:07:28,860 --> 00:07:29,700 Shut up, worm. 76 00:07:29,700 --> 00:07:30,630 Yes, sir. 77 00:07:30,630 --> 00:07:31,900 Quiet. 78 00:07:31,900 --> 00:07:34,460 There is one other minor problem. 79 00:07:34,460 --> 00:07:37,160 Being, being, being, being, being? 80 00:07:37,160 --> 00:07:38,960 Well, I know you wanted to bring your 81 00:07:38,960 --> 00:07:40,300 automobile along. 82 00:07:40,300 --> 00:07:41,760 I will bring my automobile along. 83 00:07:41,760 --> 00:07:43,600 I've had that car with me everywhere I've gone 84 00:07:43,600 --> 00:07:45,100 since high school. 85 00:07:45,100 --> 00:07:47,160 But with the ship being booked to capacity 86 00:07:47,160 --> 00:07:48,730 I'm sorry, it can't accommodate 87 00:07:48,730 --> 00:07:50,300 the extra weight. 88 00:07:50,300 --> 00:07:51,430 The weight of the 14 lifeboats 89 00:07:51,430 --> 00:07:53,830 is equivalent to the weight of your car. 90 00:07:53,830 --> 00:07:55,060 Hmm. 91 00:07:55,060 --> 00:07:56,800 Rosen, lose the 14 lifeboats. 92 00:07:56,800 --> 00:07:58,060 What? 93 00:07:58,060 --> 00:07:59,800 The car stays, the boats go. 94 00:07:59,800 --> 00:08:01,160 But, sir. 95 00:08:01,160 --> 00:08:03,230 Don't "but" me, I "but" you. 96 00:08:03,230 --> 00:08:05,200 I'm the buter, you're the butee. 97 00:08:05,200 --> 00:08:06,530 I'm the man who buts. 98 00:08:06,530 --> 00:08:08,600 I'm the man and I say the boats go. 99 00:08:08,600 --> 00:08:11,800 And now it's time for this bootlicking dog boy 100 00:08:11,800 --> 00:08:13,500 to empty my colostomy bag, 101 00:08:13,500 --> 00:08:15,100 unless, of course, we have to leave that behind 102 00:08:15,100 --> 00:08:16,860 because it carries too much weight. 103 00:08:17,500 --> 00:08:19,160 * 104 00:08:19,160 --> 00:08:21,160 Deny a man his piss bag, would ya? 105 00:08:21,160 --> 00:08:22,060 Come on, Shag, let's go. 106 00:08:22,060 --> 00:08:23,630 Come on, come on, come on! 107 00:08:23,630 --> 00:08:28,060 * 108 00:08:28,060 --> 00:08:30,600 I could go for another. 109 00:08:30,600 --> 00:08:38,100 * 110 00:08:38,100 --> 00:08:43,960 Shari, Shari, you forgot my bag, didn't ya? 111 00:08:43,960 --> 00:08:45,430 What the fuck? 112 00:08:45,430 --> 00:08:47,160 Wow, Glitter. 113 00:08:47,160 --> 00:08:49,060 Look, isn't that the most beautiful ship 114 00:08:49,060 --> 00:08:50,760 you've ever seen? 115 00:08:50,760 --> 00:08:52,300 Yeah, it's fucking great. 116 00:08:52,300 --> 00:08:53,500 Did you bring the hemorrhoid cream? 117 00:08:53,500 --> 00:08:56,600 My ass is killing me from that taxi ride. 118 00:08:56,600 --> 00:08:59,400 Honey, we're going to go on the most beautiful vacation, 119 00:08:59,400 --> 00:09:00,700 and all you can think about is your ass? 120 00:09:00,700 --> 00:09:03,100 Well, what you want me to think about, your ass? 121 00:09:03,100 --> 00:09:04,860 Well, I do from time to time, my love, 122 00:09:04,860 --> 00:09:06,260 but this time isn't one of 'em. 123 00:09:06,260 --> 00:09:07,160 Did you bring it? 124 00:09:07,160 --> 00:09:09,130 My ass is killing me here. 125 00:09:09,130 --> 00:09:10,830 Yeah, it's next to the toothpaste. 126 00:09:10,830 --> 00:09:12,630 Look it, I'm walking funny here. 127 00:09:12,630 --> 00:09:14,630 Come on. 128 00:09:18,060 --> 00:09:20,230 Well, would you look at her. 129 00:09:20,230 --> 00:09:22,060 We're gonna sail up on this puppy 130 00:09:22,060 --> 00:09:23,960 and not a moment too soon. 131 00:09:23,960 --> 00:09:25,560 If we don't sink her. 132 00:09:25,560 --> 00:09:27,230 What did you say? 133 00:09:27,230 --> 00:09:28,800 No, but it's just that, you know, 134 00:09:28,800 --> 00:09:30,860 with all of your luggage. 135 00:09:30,860 --> 00:09:32,730 Do I detect a hint of snootiness? 136 00:09:32,730 --> 00:09:34,530 Snootiness? 137 00:09:34,530 --> 00:09:37,100 No, merely disdain and contempt. 138 00:09:37,100 --> 00:09:39,860 Unseaworthy scowl. 139 00:09:39,860 --> 00:09:42,800 Did you just call me a cow? 140 00:09:42,800 --> 00:09:44,200 Madam! 141 00:09:44,200 --> 00:09:46,230 I would never presume to be so injurious 142 00:09:46,230 --> 00:09:48,200 to our four-legged friends of the cud chewing persuasion 143 00:09:48,200 --> 00:09:50,300 by making such a comparison. 144 00:09:50,300 --> 00:09:53,700 You know what, Mr. Man? 145 00:09:53,700 --> 00:09:55,700 I like you. 146 00:09:55,700 --> 00:09:57,500 You got cojones. 147 00:09:57,500 --> 00:09:58,930 Ha ha. 148 00:09:58,930 --> 00:10:00,400 Not for long. 149 00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:01,600 You're the kind of man that'll say 150 00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:03,730 whatever's on his mind. 151 00:10:03,730 --> 00:10:05,300 I like that. 152 00:10:05,300 --> 00:10:06,730 Then you'll love this. 153 00:10:06,730 --> 00:10:09,100 Would you kindly back up as your horrific breath 154 00:10:09,100 --> 00:10:10,900 is beginning to melt my eyeballs. 155 00:10:10,900 --> 00:10:12,360 Ha ha ha. 156 00:10:12,360 --> 00:10:14,760 That's right, buddy, hang the rich. 157 00:10:14,760 --> 00:10:17,400 Well, I'd be pissed, too, if I hadn't won the lotto, 158 00:10:17,400 --> 00:10:19,200 and had to carry around some old stinkin', 159 00:10:19,200 --> 00:10:22,230 filthy rich bastard's bags. 160 00:10:22,230 --> 00:10:23,500 That's terrific, madam. 161 00:10:23,500 --> 00:10:26,130 Now, if you'll kindly find reverse and recede 162 00:10:26,130 --> 00:10:27,760 before my hair does. 163 00:10:27,760 --> 00:10:30,600 Oh, sure thing, honey. 164 00:10:34,900 --> 00:10:36,760 Beep, beep, beep, beep. 165 00:10:36,760 --> 00:10:38,160 How's that, darling? 166 00:10:38,160 --> 00:10:40,400 Beep, beep, beep, beep. 167 00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:44,460 Ha ha, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. 168 00:10:48,360 --> 00:10:52,060 Ah, look at 'em, pathetic bags of flesh. 169 00:10:52,060 --> 00:10:54,860 Each one more disgusting than the last. 170 00:10:54,860 --> 00:10:56,830 I swear to Christ, I'd rather be 171 00:10:56,830 --> 00:10:58,560 heading out to sea with animals. 172 00:10:58,560 --> 00:11:00,300 At least with them you can hide the sausage 173 00:11:00,300 --> 00:11:03,060 without all the Goddamn fuss. 174 00:11:03,060 --> 00:11:04,160 Captain! 175 00:11:04,160 --> 00:11:07,560 Captain, yoo hoo! 176 00:11:07,560 --> 00:11:10,360 Peanut, I thought I told ya to stay below. 177 00:11:10,360 --> 00:11:11,960 I'll ring your bell good for this. 178 00:11:11,960 --> 00:11:13,630 Oh, won't you? 179 00:11:13,630 --> 00:11:16,360 I'm so lonely and bored. 180 00:11:16,360 --> 00:11:17,800 What about all those magazines and music 181 00:11:17,800 --> 00:11:18,660 that I left you? 182 00:11:18,660 --> 00:11:19,600 Now, stone yourself. 183 00:11:19,600 --> 00:11:20,500 Go on! 184 00:11:20,500 --> 00:11:21,100 I won't. 185 00:11:21,100 --> 00:11:22,660 I won't, I won't. 186 00:11:22,660 --> 00:11:23,830 I won't be hidden away. 187 00:11:23,830 --> 00:11:27,330 I won't leave you alone until you make me your wife. 188 00:11:27,330 --> 00:11:29,530 The sea is the only wife I'll ever know. 189 00:11:29,530 --> 00:11:30,900 Now, get below before I send you 190 00:11:30,900 --> 00:11:32,530 to Davy Jones's locker. 191 00:11:32,530 --> 00:11:33,760 Oh. 192 00:11:33,760 --> 00:11:36,800 A nice stinky locker would be great about now. 193 00:11:36,800 --> 00:11:38,060 Oh, go on, go on. 194 00:11:38,060 --> 00:11:39,330 And don't pester me anymore. 195 00:11:39,330 --> 00:11:41,100 Why don't you put on that red silk kimono 196 00:11:41,100 --> 00:11:42,730 that I brought you from Newark, 197 00:11:42,730 --> 00:11:45,160 and wait for me, below? 198 00:11:45,160 --> 00:11:47,400 You, poop. 199 00:11:49,060 --> 00:11:50,500 All right, son, step up, don't be shy. 200 00:11:50,500 --> 00:11:51,930 Come on, you're next, you're next. 201 00:11:51,930 --> 00:11:52,900 What have you got in the bag? 202 00:11:52,900 --> 00:11:54,330 Painting supplies. 203 00:11:54,330 --> 00:11:56,260 I'm documenting this voyage on canvas 204 00:11:56,260 --> 00:11:57,860 for my personal memoir. 205 00:11:57,860 --> 00:12:00,060 Oh, that's sweet. 206 00:12:00,060 --> 00:12:01,600 Hey, at least I know if we run out of booze, 207 00:12:01,600 --> 00:12:03,060 who's door I'm gonna come sniffing around, huh. 208 00:12:03,060 --> 00:12:04,460 Sniffing around, you get it? 209 00:12:04,460 --> 00:12:05,730 I have no idea what you're talking about. 210 00:12:05,730 --> 00:12:07,560 Sniffing paint's the joke, acrylic, come on. 211 00:12:07,560 --> 00:12:08,360 Next, next. 212 00:12:08,360 --> 00:12:10,130 We're next, my good man. 213 00:12:10,130 --> 00:12:11,760 Oh, hey, you give me about 10 minutes 214 00:12:11,760 --> 00:12:13,530 and I'll show you how good a man I am, huh. 215 00:12:13,530 --> 00:12:15,660 Ooh, lively. 216 00:12:15,660 --> 00:12:17,430 I hope there are lively people on this ship. 217 00:12:17,430 --> 00:12:19,760 I just love lively people. 218 00:12:19,760 --> 00:12:22,330 Ha ha ha. 219 00:12:22,330 --> 00:12:23,230 All right, pal, hold on. 220 00:12:23,230 --> 00:12:24,530 What's in the bags. 221 00:12:24,530 --> 00:12:28,230 Pieces of the last good man the madam had. 222 00:12:28,230 --> 00:12:30,160 Plus enough clothing to cover every 223 00:12:30,160 --> 00:12:32,430 man, woman, and animal ever breastfed 224 00:12:32,430 --> 00:12:34,660 by your mama. 225 00:12:34,660 --> 00:12:35,860 Is that right? 226 00:12:35,860 --> 00:12:36,960 Yes. 227 00:12:36,960 --> 00:12:37,660 All right, move it on. 228 00:12:37,660 --> 00:12:39,130 Move it on. 229 00:12:39,130 --> 00:12:40,830 Good man, good man. 230 00:12:40,830 --> 00:12:41,760 Nice to see you, dad. 231 00:12:41,760 --> 00:12:43,200 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 232 00:12:43,200 --> 00:12:44,100 Hey, humpty and dumpty, where are you going? 233 00:12:44,100 --> 00:12:45,200 You can't bring a coffin. 234 00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:46,500 There's no dead guys on this boat. 235 00:12:46,500 --> 00:12:49,160 Hey, pal, there's no...dead guys. 236 00:12:49,160 --> 00:12:50,060 All right, all right. 237 00:12:50,060 --> 00:12:51,860 Everybody's on. 238 00:12:51,860 --> 00:12:52,600 Come on, sir, you're next. 239 00:12:52,600 --> 00:12:53,630 Come on, sir. 240 00:12:53,630 --> 00:12:54,960 The one with no chick, come on, move it on. 241 00:12:54,960 --> 00:12:55,900 Let's go, let's go, let's go. 242 00:12:55,900 --> 00:12:58,630 Here we go. 243 00:12:58,630 --> 00:13:01,300 You know, I don't know about this aluminum hull. 244 00:13:01,300 --> 00:13:05,960 Do you think she'll go down on us? 245 00:13:05,960 --> 00:13:10,130 That would suck. 246 00:13:10,130 --> 00:13:11,230 Thank you, I could use 247 00:13:11,230 --> 00:13:12,530 a good stiff one. 248 00:13:12,530 --> 00:13:13,830 Certainly. 249 00:13:13,830 --> 00:13:15,630 Right after this drink. 250 00:13:15,630 --> 00:13:19,260 * 251 00:13:27,330 --> 00:13:29,660 Hey, what's with this piece of shit thing? 252 00:13:29,660 --> 00:13:33,530 Oh, she is the Blatant's prized car, all right? 253 00:13:33,530 --> 00:13:35,930 He doesn't go anywhere without it. 254 00:13:35,930 --> 00:13:38,060 Gads, this piece of shit? 255 00:13:38,060 --> 00:13:40,130 It's Blatant's good luck charm or something. 256 00:13:40,130 --> 00:13:41,800 Come on, quit diddle and daddling. 257 00:13:41,800 --> 00:13:45,330 You and I have got to throw out some life boats. 258 00:13:49,800 --> 00:13:52,260 Why did we have to paint these walls all white? 259 00:13:52,260 --> 00:13:55,060 They're just gonna get filthy dirty. 260 00:13:55,060 --> 00:13:56,930 What's it to you? 261 00:13:56,930 --> 00:13:58,860 I don't know. 262 00:13:58,860 --> 00:14:01,330 Come on, quit diddle and daddling. 263 00:14:01,330 --> 00:14:04,400 You and I have to throw out some lifeboats. 264 00:14:07,260 --> 00:14:09,830 Aye, aye, aye, aye, Earth to wanker. 265 00:14:09,830 --> 00:14:10,700 Earth to wanker. 266 00:14:10,700 --> 00:14:12,700 Come on, come on, come on. 267 00:14:12,700 --> 00:14:14,430 I can't move these boats all by myself, come on. 268 00:14:14,430 --> 00:14:15,660 All right, all right, all right. 269 00:14:15,660 --> 00:14:16,330 All right, come on. 270 00:14:16,330 --> 00:14:20,200 You know my problem. 271 00:14:20,200 --> 00:14:23,100 Captain on the bridge. 272 00:14:23,100 --> 00:14:24,130 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 273 00:14:24,130 --> 00:14:25,830 How's she faring? 274 00:14:25,830 --> 00:14:27,330 She fares well, sir. 275 00:14:27,330 --> 00:14:28,800 All systems are ready. 276 00:14:28,800 --> 00:14:30,660 All personnel are standing by. 277 00:14:30,660 --> 00:14:33,060 Good, good. 278 00:14:33,060 --> 00:14:36,060 Sailor, what have you got in your hands? 279 00:14:36,060 --> 00:14:37,130 Where's the wheel? 280 00:14:37,130 --> 00:14:38,760 My solid gold steering wheel? 281 00:14:38,760 --> 00:14:42,600 Well, sir, when I came up this morning it was gone. 282 00:14:42,600 --> 00:14:45,360 So, I had to rig up these pliers to steer it with, 283 00:14:45,360 --> 00:14:48,300 and it works pretty good. 284 00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:52,500 Damn you and your pliers! 285 00:14:52,500 --> 00:14:53,530 Where's my wheel? 286 00:14:53,530 --> 00:14:57,130 Sir, it was solid gold, and this is New York. 287 00:14:57,130 --> 00:14:59,200 Sir, I've just received word that all passengers 288 00:14:59,200 --> 00:15:00,600 are onboard and all hands 289 00:15:00,600 --> 00:15:02,200 are ready to shove off. 290 00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:06,300 You really shouldn't worry, it works pretty good. 291 00:15:06,300 --> 00:15:07,900 It's only a wheel. 292 00:15:07,900 --> 00:15:09,730 Sir. 293 00:15:09,730 --> 00:15:13,060 Check it out. 294 00:15:13,060 --> 00:15:14,700 Willy has it under control. 295 00:15:14,700 --> 00:15:17,900 Sir. 296 00:15:17,900 --> 00:15:21,100 Sir? 297 00:15:21,100 --> 00:15:22,130 Shut up. 298 00:15:22,130 --> 00:15:23,560 Shutting up. 299 00:15:23,560 --> 00:15:24,960 Shove off. 300 00:15:24,960 --> 00:15:26,600 Shoving off. 301 00:15:26,600 --> 00:15:27,730 Piss off. 302 00:15:27,730 --> 00:15:29,500 Pissing off. 303 00:15:29,500 --> 00:15:30,330 Yes, you are. 304 00:15:30,330 --> 00:15:32,460 Shut up, little man. 305 00:15:32,460 --> 00:15:34,600 Shutting up. 306 00:15:34,600 --> 00:15:35,930 Stop it. 307 00:15:35,930 --> 00:15:37,830 Stopping that. 308 00:15:37,830 --> 00:15:39,130 Cut it out. 309 00:15:39,130 --> 00:15:42,500 -Cutting it out. -Damn you, man. 310 00:15:42,500 --> 00:15:45,860 You will be silent or I shall slap you like a puppet. 311 00:15:45,860 --> 00:15:48,060 I think this guy's nut is cracked. 312 00:15:48,060 --> 00:15:49,830 Slap you for making it hurt. 313 00:15:49,830 --> 00:15:51,200 All systems are go, sir. 314 00:15:51,200 --> 00:15:54,700 Engines ahead one third, sir? 315 00:15:54,700 --> 00:15:56,300 Engines ahead one third. 316 00:15:56,300 --> 00:16:00,130 Let's get this ship of fools outta here. 317 00:16:00,130 --> 00:16:01,960 Engines ahead one third, mister. 318 00:16:01,960 --> 00:16:03,260 Aye aye, captain. 319 00:16:03,260 --> 00:16:06,360 Engines ahead one third. 320 00:16:06,360 --> 00:16:10,060 Attention, attention, standby all engineers. 321 00:16:10,060 --> 00:16:12,960 Prepare to get underway. 322 00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:16,560 Engines ahead one third. 323 00:16:16,560 --> 00:16:19,300 Yes, sir. 324 00:16:37,660 --> 00:16:39,360 Baked beans? 325 00:16:43,060 --> 00:16:46,530 One third, speed ahead. 326 00:16:46,530 --> 00:16:48,300 Yes. 327 00:16:51,660 --> 00:16:53,760 Yes. 328 00:16:58,060 --> 00:17:02,300 By the way, you have some radicchio lettuce in your teeth. 329 00:17:11,260 --> 00:17:15,330 Engines ahead one third, clown. 330 00:17:16,430 --> 00:17:19,160 Engines ahead one third, clown. 331 00:17:19,160 --> 00:17:20,860 Aye aye, sir. 332 00:17:20,860 --> 00:17:21,960 Get going, clown. 333 00:17:21,960 --> 00:17:24,260 Go, go, go, go, go! 334 00:17:26,830 --> 00:17:32,430 Oh b-b-b-buttons. 335 00:17:33,460 --> 00:17:35,500 Ooh. 336 00:17:51,600 --> 00:18:34,460 * 337 00:18:34,460 --> 00:18:36,960 Well, here we go out to trace 338 00:18:36,960 --> 00:18:38,200 the reverse path the Titanic 339 00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:39,360 would've taken had it not been 340 00:18:39,360 --> 00:18:42,160 such an expensive piece of crap and sunk. 341 00:18:42,160 --> 00:18:43,600 Is that your hand on my buttocks? 342 00:18:43,600 --> 00:18:45,360 Yup. 343 00:18:45,360 --> 00:18:46,700 Very good then, Margaret, a toast. 344 00:18:46,700 --> 00:18:47,830 A bagel! 345 00:18:47,830 --> 00:18:49,900 To success. 346 00:18:49,900 --> 00:18:52,900 To fingers up one nostril. 347 00:18:52,900 --> 00:18:54,930 Cheers! 348 00:18:54,930 --> 00:18:56,960 Taxi! 349 00:18:56,960 --> 00:19:00,900 * 350 00:19:00,900 --> 00:19:02,900 We're moving. 351 00:19:02,900 --> 00:19:05,060 It works. 352 00:19:05,060 --> 00:19:07,930 The aluminum hull, it works. 353 00:19:07,930 --> 00:19:09,060 It works. 354 00:19:09,060 --> 00:19:13,500 Only 4,000 more miles to go. 355 00:19:13,500 --> 00:19:17,530 * 356 00:19:21,060 --> 00:19:23,760 Mistress. 357 00:19:23,760 --> 00:19:26,200 Vladimina. 358 00:19:26,200 --> 00:19:28,930 Wake up, wake up, you sleepyhead. 359 00:19:28,930 --> 00:19:31,460 Ha ha ha. 360 00:19:31,460 --> 00:19:33,960 Ah, come on. 361 00:19:33,960 --> 00:19:36,500 Come on, little sunshine. 362 00:19:36,500 --> 00:19:37,730 Wake up. 363 00:19:37,730 --> 00:19:39,760 Ha ha ha. 364 00:19:41,960 --> 00:19:46,730 We are in the hull of the great ship. 365 00:19:46,730 --> 00:19:50,700 Very good, Igor. 366 00:19:50,700 --> 00:19:53,560 Ooh, I'm hungry. 367 00:19:53,560 --> 00:19:55,160 What's to eat? 368 00:19:55,160 --> 00:19:59,260 There are many beautiful women on board, Mistress. 369 00:19:59,260 --> 00:20:02,530 Shall I have Mareem fetch one for you? 370 00:20:02,530 --> 00:20:04,230 No, not yet. 371 00:20:04,230 --> 00:20:06,200 There's plenty of time for that. 372 00:20:06,200 --> 00:20:08,400 Just a light snack. 373 00:20:08,400 --> 00:20:11,330 Something I can seduce and feed on easily. 374 00:20:11,330 --> 00:20:12,560 Okay. 375 00:20:16,630 --> 00:20:19,730 Mareem, go wait a minute. 376 00:20:21,960 --> 00:20:24,300 Who the hell is that? 377 00:20:24,300 --> 00:20:29,760 Mareem, you know anybody at 555-2748? 378 00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:36,800 Go get the boss a snack. 379 00:20:36,800 --> 00:20:40,600 * 380 00:20:40,600 --> 00:20:42,330 Good boy. 381 00:20:42,330 --> 00:20:43,260 * 382 00:20:48,560 --> 00:20:50,130 Hey, babe? 383 00:20:50,130 --> 00:20:52,230 You know this trip is gonna be really great. 384 00:20:52,230 --> 00:20:54,600 I mean, now that you're off tour and all 385 00:20:54,600 --> 00:20:56,100 we can just like, you know, get you back 386 00:20:56,100 --> 00:20:57,930 into good health. 387 00:20:57,930 --> 00:21:01,330 You could be the same guy that you always were, you know? 388 00:21:01,330 --> 00:21:03,630 Are youare you listening to me? 389 00:21:03,630 --> 00:21:06,360 Well, I'd be more willing to listen if I hadn't 390 00:21:06,360 --> 00:21:09,360 squirted toothpaste all over me hemorrhoids 391 00:21:09,360 --> 00:21:14,230 and it wasn't pulsating like strobe lights, wouldn't I? 392 00:21:14,230 --> 00:21:17,460 I told you it was next to the toothpaste. 393 00:21:17,460 --> 00:21:20,160 You should look before you squirt. 394 00:21:20,160 --> 00:21:21,960 Anyway, first thing we're gonna do 395 00:21:21,960 --> 00:21:24,260 Shh, shh, baby, baby, baby, 396 00:21:24,260 --> 00:21:27,060 I'm trying to watch what's on pay-per-view here. 397 00:21:27,060 --> 00:21:29,930 I'm planning our vacation. 398 00:21:29,930 --> 00:21:31,100 Just give me a minute, all right? 399 00:21:31,100 --> 00:21:32,700 Let me watch this. 400 00:21:32,700 --> 00:22:05,830 * 401 00:22:05,830 --> 00:22:06,900 Call your local cable operator 402 00:22:06,900 --> 00:22:09,230 right now to rent 403 00:22:09,230 --> 00:22:13,060 Honey, that looks like a stupid movie. 404 00:22:13,060 --> 00:22:15,700 We're not gonna rent that, are we? 405 00:22:15,700 --> 00:22:17,360 Honey? 406 00:22:33,600 --> 00:22:37,500 * 407 00:22:37,500 --> 00:22:40,360 Hey, toots. 408 00:22:42,760 --> 00:22:45,700 Do you like girls? 409 00:22:45,700 --> 00:22:48,100 Yeah, as a matter of fact, I was just about to go upstairs 410 00:22:48,100 --> 00:22:52,430 and grease down your mom. 411 00:22:52,430 --> 00:22:54,060 Come with me. 412 00:22:54,060 --> 00:22:57,930 I show you pretty girl. 413 00:22:57,930 --> 00:23:19,460 * 414 00:23:19,460 --> 00:23:21,430 Okay. 415 00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:31,860 * 416 00:24:31,860 --> 00:24:33,500 This is a perk. 417 00:24:33,500 --> 00:26:01,230 * 418 00:26:01,230 --> 00:26:04,760 Nobody told Igor about the full monty. 419 00:26:04,760 --> 00:27:06,460 * 420 00:27:06,460 --> 00:27:10,060 Baby, this is gonna be some of the best 421 00:27:10,060 --> 00:27:12,430 humpin', grindin', lickin', and stickin' 422 00:27:12,430 --> 00:27:13,760 of your life. 423 00:27:13,760 --> 00:28:11,060 * 424 00:28:11,060 --> 00:28:13,660 Oh no, she's gonna want me to boink her. 425 00:28:13,660 --> 00:28:17,660 * 426 00:28:17,660 --> 00:28:19,430 Hey, tiger. 427 00:28:19,430 --> 00:30:18,960 * 428 00:30:18,960 --> 00:30:20,700 Oh please. 429 00:30:20,700 --> 00:31:17,730 * 430 00:31:17,730 --> 00:31:19,860 Wake up, sleeping beauty. 431 00:31:19,860 --> 00:31:23,100 I've got a surprise for you. 432 00:31:23,100 --> 00:31:24,260 Baby, I'm so tired. 433 00:31:24,260 --> 00:31:25,230 You saidyou promised. 434 00:31:25,230 --> 00:31:26,600 Baby, I'm sleeping, baby. 435 00:31:26,600 --> 00:31:28,130 Come on, you promised. 436 00:31:28,130 --> 00:31:29,600 I'm tired, baby. 437 00:31:29,600 --> 00:31:30,560 Come on. 438 00:31:30,560 --> 00:31:31,630 Baby. 439 00:31:31,630 --> 00:31:32,630 Please. 440 00:31:32,630 --> 00:31:33,630 Baby, baby. 441 00:31:33,630 --> 00:31:34,730 Please. 442 00:31:34,730 --> 00:31:36,400 Oh, all right. 443 00:31:36,400 --> 00:31:37,600 Please. 444 00:31:37,600 --> 00:31:39,660 Okay. 445 00:31:40,730 --> 00:31:42,900 Oh, baby. 446 00:31:42,900 --> 00:31:46,760 Oh you're so good. 447 00:31:46,760 --> 00:31:48,130 Thank you, baby. 448 00:31:48,130 --> 00:31:49,060 Goodnight. 449 00:31:49,060 --> 00:31:49,830 That was so good, baby. 450 00:31:49,830 --> 00:31:50,600 That was so great. 451 00:31:50,600 --> 00:31:52,100 It was fantastic. 452 00:31:52,100 --> 00:31:53,530 Don't think you're gonna pull any of this 453 00:31:53,530 --> 00:31:55,530 chair crap either like you did the last time. 454 00:31:55,530 --> 00:31:58,260 We all saw when you hit my pal, Carlito, 455 00:31:58,260 --> 00:32:00,330 in the ass with that chair. 456 00:32:00,330 --> 00:32:02,500 We're not gonna let this [beep] happen again. 457 00:32:02,500 --> 00:32:04,460 That's right, and if you guys think you're gonna 458 00:32:04,460 --> 00:32:07,230 come in the ring and you're gonna bust me and Cal up 459 00:32:07,230 --> 00:32:09,930 like a pair of melons you got another thing comin' 460 00:32:09,930 --> 00:32:11,400 because we're gonna take your tongues 461 00:32:11,400 --> 00:32:13,230 and we're gonna stick 'em right up your butts, okay? 462 00:32:13,230 --> 00:32:14,700 You hear that, everybody? 463 00:32:14,700 --> 00:32:15,900 You hear that? 464 00:32:15,900 --> 00:32:16,730 Well, there you have it. 465 00:32:16,730 --> 00:32:18,060 Two very, very 466 00:32:18,060 --> 00:32:47,900 * 467 00:32:47,900 --> 00:32:50,300 What a great night. 468 00:32:50,300 --> 00:32:52,400 Great night for suicide, take care. 469 00:32:52,400 --> 00:32:55,600 Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. 470 00:32:55,600 --> 00:32:57,760 Have you ever felt like everything is just 471 00:32:57,760 --> 00:32:59,060 totally pointless? 472 00:32:59,060 --> 00:33:02,730 Like, it's the same day over and over? 473 00:33:02,730 --> 00:33:03,960 It's just not worth it anymore 474 00:33:03,960 --> 00:33:07,800 to be around here. 475 00:33:07,800 --> 00:33:09,400 Of course. 476 00:33:09,400 --> 00:33:11,130 That's what I do for a living. 477 00:33:11,130 --> 00:33:13,400 I'm an artist. 478 00:33:13,400 --> 00:33:16,960 I wallow in a world of self-depression. 479 00:33:16,960 --> 00:33:19,060 I look deep into the innermost 480 00:33:19,060 --> 00:33:21,060 lonely moments of my soul, 481 00:33:21,060 --> 00:33:23,230 and I put it on canvas, 482 00:33:23,230 --> 00:33:24,160 and make millions of dollars, 483 00:33:24,160 --> 00:33:26,060 but enough about me. 484 00:33:26,060 --> 00:33:28,060 Yeah, well, making millions 485 00:33:28,060 --> 00:33:29,800 isn't an option for me. 486 00:33:29,800 --> 00:33:31,060 See ya. 487 00:33:31,060 --> 00:33:33,200 No, look, look, look, look. 488 00:33:33,200 --> 00:33:35,160 Do what you will, but I've been 489 00:33:35,160 --> 00:33:37,400 on this deck all day long 490 00:33:37,400 --> 00:33:40,460 looking for inspiration, looking out into the golden horizon 491 00:33:40,460 --> 00:33:42,430 trying to find something to move my soul. 492 00:33:42,430 --> 00:33:45,130 Nothing did, until I saw you. 493 00:33:45,130 --> 00:33:46,900 Beautiful, alone, and distance, 494 00:33:46,900 --> 00:33:48,060 I must paint you. 495 00:33:48,060 --> 00:33:50,160 I must paint you, please. 496 00:33:50,160 --> 00:33:52,430 You really wanna paint me? 497 00:33:52,430 --> 00:33:55,160 I would consider it a great act of mercy 498 00:33:55,160 --> 00:33:57,060 if you would allow me to paint 499 00:33:57,060 --> 00:33:59,260 such a beautiful creature as yourself. 500 00:33:59,260 --> 00:34:02,130 * 501 00:34:02,130 --> 00:34:05,530 You're a painter and you make a great living? 502 00:34:05,530 --> 00:34:08,230 Of course, how else could I afford 503 00:34:08,230 --> 00:34:11,560 to book passage on the world's mightiest ship 504 00:34:11,560 --> 00:34:16,730 if I weren't so wildly successful? 505 00:34:16,730 --> 00:34:18,360 Here's the other two grand. 506 00:34:18,360 --> 00:34:20,060 Now that's ten grand all together, 507 00:34:20,060 --> 00:34:21,930 plus three grand for the vig, 508 00:34:21,930 --> 00:34:23,600 and if I don't get it by next Tuesday 509 00:34:23,600 --> 00:34:25,660 I'm gonna break your fucking knees. 510 00:34:25,660 --> 00:34:28,660 Better yet, I'll break your fuckin' fingers. 511 00:34:28,660 --> 00:34:29,900 Let's see you be an artist 512 00:34:29,900 --> 00:34:31,960 with broken fuckin' fingers. 513 00:34:32,700 --> 00:34:35,500 * 514 00:34:35,500 --> 00:34:37,600 So, how about if I change into a blue shirt, 515 00:34:37,600 --> 00:34:40,560 and you and I go back to my cabin? 516 00:34:46,730 --> 00:34:51,600 So, um...where are all your other paintings? 517 00:34:51,600 --> 00:34:54,760 Oh, well, you know, I have a very catchy style, 518 00:34:54,760 --> 00:34:57,200 and whatnot and I don't like being surrounded 519 00:34:57,200 --> 00:35:00,530 by my own, you know, work 'cause I feel it might, 520 00:35:00,530 --> 00:35:03,400 you know, influence my firstfuture work, 521 00:35:03,400 --> 00:35:06,630 and, uh, you're very beautiful by the way. 522 00:35:06,630 --> 00:35:07,630 Thank you. 523 00:35:07,630 --> 00:35:12,160 So, what's your specialty in painting? 524 00:35:12,160 --> 00:35:18,760 Oh, I, I, I, I paint n-n-n-n-nudes. 525 00:35:18,760 --> 00:35:21,730 I paint nudes. 526 00:35:21,730 --> 00:35:24,430 I, I paint nudes. 527 00:35:24,430 --> 00:35:29,230 Oh, so maybe that's how you'll wanna paint me then. 528 00:35:31,400 --> 00:35:46,300 * 529 00:35:46,300 --> 00:35:48,500 Well, let's get started then. 530 00:35:48,500 --> 00:36:25,060 * 531 00:36:25,060 --> 00:36:26,760 I'll be ready in a minute. 532 00:36:26,760 --> 00:36:47,600 * 533 00:36:47,600 --> 00:36:49,430 Ready. 534 00:36:51,700 --> 00:36:54,500 Okay. 535 00:36:54,500 --> 00:37:29,830 * 536 00:37:29,830 --> 00:37:31,860 How's it going? 537 00:37:31,860 --> 00:37:32,830 * 538 00:37:32,830 --> 00:37:54,660 Good. 539 00:37:54,660 --> 00:38:29,200 * 540 00:38:29,200 --> 00:38:32,330 So, how's it going? 541 00:38:37,060 --> 00:38:39,730 It's good. 542 00:38:39,730 --> 00:38:41,660 Are you done yet? 543 00:38:41,660 --> 00:38:44,200 I'm taking a look. 544 00:38:44,200 --> 00:38:45,360 Come on, let me see it. 545 00:38:45,360 --> 00:38:46,800 -It's not quite ready. -Come on. 546 00:38:46,800 --> 00:38:48,830 Let me see it, please. 547 00:38:48,830 --> 00:38:50,430 Here, fine, fine, fine, go. 548 00:38:52,060 --> 00:38:54,300 What the hell is that? 549 00:38:54,300 --> 00:38:56,230 Look, I'm a painter, okay? 550 00:38:56,230 --> 00:38:58,200 But right now I just paint houses, 551 00:38:58,200 --> 00:38:59,330 but I'm going to France this Summer, 552 00:38:59,330 --> 00:39:00,830 and gonna become a very famous artist. 553 00:39:00,830 --> 00:39:01,900 So, what do ya, say? 554 00:39:01,900 --> 00:39:03,060 I get naked, you wanna hit the sheets, 555 00:39:03,060 --> 00:39:04,130 done, boom. 556 00:39:04,130 --> 00:39:06,660 Ugh, in your dreams, asshole. 557 00:39:06,660 --> 00:39:08,360 Ugh! 558 00:39:11,400 --> 00:39:13,460 Nice. 559 00:39:13,460 --> 00:39:19,130 * 560 00:39:19,130 --> 00:39:23,630 Mm, she'll do just fine. 561 00:39:23,630 --> 00:39:24,600 * 562 00:39:24,600 --> 00:39:26,530 Delicious. 563 00:39:26,530 --> 00:39:29,430 * 564 00:39:34,560 --> 00:39:49,260 * 565 00:39:49,260 --> 00:39:52,330 Oh, look at all these fucking people. 566 00:39:52,330 --> 00:39:54,600 Where we supposed to sit 'round here? 567 00:39:54,600 --> 00:39:55,700 I dunno. 568 00:39:55,700 --> 00:39:58,100 Love, don't be like that before I've had 569 00:39:58,100 --> 00:39:59,900 my three Bloody Marys. 570 00:39:59,900 --> 00:40:01,060 Be like what? 571 00:40:01,060 --> 00:40:02,960 Be like, "I dunno, ah-ugh-ah." 572 00:40:02,960 --> 00:40:07,500 Mr. Glitter Bolan, oh, my dear sir, 573 00:40:07,500 --> 00:40:09,700 oh, how are you? 574 00:40:09,700 --> 00:40:11,430 What's your name then, Mary? 575 00:40:11,430 --> 00:40:17,000 Ha-ha-ha, I'm Mr. Bushsmell, 576 00:40:17,000 --> 00:40:18,230 the ship's cruise director, 577 00:40:18,230 --> 00:40:21,160 and, you know, I just wanna tell you 578 00:40:21,160 --> 00:40:24,300 what an extreme pleasure it is 579 00:40:24,300 --> 00:40:27,330 to have a real live rock and roll star 580 00:40:27,330 --> 00:40:30,060 here on the TITanic. 581 00:40:30,060 --> 00:40:32,560 Right, eh, thanks, yeah, right, well. 582 00:40:32,560 --> 00:40:33,700 All right, who does she have to hump 583 00:40:33,700 --> 00:40:36,360 for us to get a friggin' seat around here? 584 00:40:36,360 --> 00:40:39,000 Well, they'll be no humping out here. 585 00:40:39,000 --> 00:40:40,860 We do that in the kitchen freezer. 586 00:40:40,860 --> 00:40:42,230 That's just a joke. 587 00:40:42,230 --> 00:40:44,800 Anywho, um, I'd be happy to get you a seat 588 00:40:44,800 --> 00:40:46,630 just as soon as I ask you one 589 00:40:46,630 --> 00:40:49,260 teensy-weensy,itty-bitty little, little question. 590 00:40:49,260 --> 00:40:53,030 Okay, um, do you think you could maybe get up 591 00:40:53,030 --> 00:40:55,400 and do a song with the band, do you know? 592 00:40:55,400 --> 00:40:58,000 It would be a really, really, great thing. 593 00:40:58,000 --> 00:41:00,960 Aw, come on, piss off, Mary, eh? 594 00:41:00,960 --> 00:41:04,130 Oh, come on, it would be a great thing for you to do. 595 00:41:04,130 --> 00:41:05,660 All right, let me tell you something, all right? 596 00:41:05,660 --> 00:41:06,900 I'm not bullshitting you. 597 00:41:06,900 --> 00:41:08,760 Okay, I am not a bullshit artist. 598 00:41:08,760 --> 00:41:10,760 If there's one thing I hate 599 00:41:10,760 --> 00:41:12,060 it's bullshit, okay? 600 00:41:12,060 --> 00:41:13,900 You ask anyone around here 601 00:41:13,900 --> 00:41:16,800 I do not bullshit anybody, 602 00:41:16,800 --> 00:41:19,430 and that's why I mean it from the bottom of my heart 603 00:41:19,430 --> 00:41:24,200 when I tell you it would be totally awesome. 604 00:41:24,200 --> 00:41:26,960 Uh, listen, isn't there someone else 605 00:41:26,960 --> 00:41:28,130 famous around here who could sing 606 00:41:28,130 --> 00:41:30,200 your friggin' song for ya? 607 00:41:30,200 --> 00:41:32,760 Oh, there are lots of famous people here 608 00:41:32,760 --> 00:41:33,930 on the TITanic. 609 00:41:33,930 --> 00:41:35,460 Well, um, right over there, 610 00:41:35,460 --> 00:41:38,360 that's the socialite Molly Black, 611 00:41:38,360 --> 00:41:41,060 and, um, okay, over there, 612 00:41:41,060 --> 00:41:47,060 that's Prince Leonardo of DiCaprio, purr-meow, 613 00:41:47,060 --> 00:41:49,560 oh, he's so skinny, but, you know, 614 00:41:49,560 --> 00:41:51,130 none of those famous people sing, 615 00:41:51,130 --> 00:41:54,130 so why don't you just get up there 616 00:41:54,130 --> 00:41:55,100 and sing us a little song. 617 00:41:55,100 --> 00:41:57,100 Aye, aye. 618 00:41:57,100 --> 00:41:58,360 Yeah, go on, sing a song. 619 00:41:58,360 --> 00:42:01,060 I'm not a fucking singer, I'm a rock star. 620 00:42:01,060 --> 00:42:04,600 Oh, come on, one teeny-tiny tune? 621 00:42:04,600 --> 00:42:09,260 Well, uh, maybe I'd do it for some compensation, get me? 622 00:42:09,260 --> 00:42:10,730 Some compensation? 623 00:42:10,730 --> 00:42:14,060 Compensation. 624 00:42:14,060 --> 00:42:19,560 Do you mean that you want me to... 625 00:42:19,560 --> 00:42:20,930 do you? 626 00:42:20,930 --> 00:42:22,930 Or something like that? 627 00:42:22,930 --> 00:42:24,130 No, what the fuck is that? 628 00:42:24,130 --> 00:42:26,060 Nothing like that at all! 629 00:42:26,060 --> 00:42:28,730 Well, if you don't me to... 630 00:42:31,060 --> 00:42:34,630 do you, then what do you want? 631 00:42:34,630 --> 00:42:36,930 Just, you know, give me the goods, man, 632 00:42:36,930 --> 00:42:38,660 give me the goods. 633 00:42:38,660 --> 00:42:40,060 Give you the goods? 634 00:42:40,060 --> 00:42:42,300 Yeah, give me the goods. 635 00:42:42,300 --> 00:42:47,160 Wait, is it me, or are we still talking about me 636 00:42:47,160 --> 00:42:49,160 No, no, no, ya putz, 637 00:42:49,160 --> 00:42:51,100 some drinks, some booze. 638 00:42:51,100 --> 00:42:55,060 Oh, booze, well, that's easy, 639 00:42:55,060 --> 00:42:56,860 drinks are free, on the house 640 00:42:56,860 --> 00:42:58,160 for the rest of the cruise. 641 00:42:58,160 --> 00:42:59,860 That's what I'm and the lady? 642 00:42:59,860 --> 00:43:01,260 Oh, absolutely. 643 00:43:01,260 --> 00:43:03,060 All right, now we're talkin', 644 00:43:03,060 --> 00:43:05,660 so I'm gonna start with three Bloody Marys, 645 00:43:05,660 --> 00:43:08,960 and I'm gonna have them up on fucking stage, aren't I? 646 00:43:08,960 --> 00:43:10,700 It'll be our pleasure. 647 00:43:10,700 --> 00:43:12,760 Oh, hey, hey. 648 00:43:12,760 --> 00:43:14,660 Thank you so much. 649 00:43:14,660 --> 00:43:18,100 Right, just get me drinks to the stage. 650 00:43:18,100 --> 00:43:21,300 Robby, pull Mary's plug and dip it three times, 651 00:43:21,300 --> 00:43:23,160 then bring it up to the stage. 652 00:43:23,160 --> 00:43:24,460 Excuse me, hunny. 653 00:43:33,360 --> 00:44:19,300 * 654 00:44:19,300 --> 00:44:21,230 So, about last night I just 655 00:44:21,230 --> 00:44:24,060 Mary, I haven't seen you in so long. 656 00:44:24,060 --> 00:44:25,700 We have so much to catch up on. 657 00:44:25,700 --> 00:44:28,600 Can you excuse us? 658 00:44:28,600 --> 00:44:32,160 Hm, ménage àtrois. 659 00:44:32,160 --> 00:44:35,100 I love it. 660 00:44:35,100 --> 00:44:37,300 Oh, wow, Glitter Bolan. 661 00:44:37,300 --> 00:44:39,730 I love your album, "Stubble Judge." 662 00:44:39,730 --> 00:44:41,600 I think it's great, really. 663 00:44:41,600 --> 00:44:44,060 Yeah, yeah. 664 00:44:44,060 --> 00:44:45,930 Barf at the Moon's my favorite, 665 00:44:45,930 --> 00:44:49,330 it's all it is, it's genius. 666 00:44:49,330 --> 00:44:51,700 Well, you ruggers know "Fairy's Gay Boots" then? 667 00:44:51,700 --> 00:44:52,600 -Yeah! -Yeah! 668 00:44:52,600 --> 00:44:54,560 Well, play it, you little piss-heads. 669 00:44:54,560 --> 00:44:55,560 All right. 670 00:44:55,560 --> 00:45:03,500 * 671 00:45:03,500 --> 00:45:05,760 * Yeah 672 00:45:05,760 --> 00:45:07,060 * Right 673 00:45:07,060 --> 00:45:17,300 * 674 00:45:17,300 --> 00:45:22,260 * When I got these boots from a fairy, yeah * 675 00:45:22,260 --> 00:45:24,800 * 676 00:45:24,800 --> 00:45:29,700 * He gave them to me in the blue moonlight * 677 00:45:29,700 --> 00:45:31,500 * 678 00:45:31,500 --> 00:45:37,300 * He said you drink and smoke your life away * 679 00:45:37,300 --> 00:45:38,930 * 680 00:45:38,930 --> 00:45:44,230 * You should at least have a good pair of boots * 681 00:45:44,230 --> 00:45:47,530 * All right now 682 00:45:47,530 --> 00:45:52,660 * 683 00:45:52,660 --> 00:45:58,430 * Well, take these boots and wear them well * 684 00:45:58,430 --> 00:46:00,400 * 685 00:46:00,400 --> 00:46:06,700 * Put them on your feet of course * 686 00:46:06,700 --> 00:46:11,630 * 'cause if you wear them on your head, oh yeah * 687 00:46:11,630 --> 00:46:14,100 * 688 00:46:14,100 --> 00:46:22,930 * It ain't right, all right now * 689 00:46:22,930 --> 00:46:26,630 * 690 00:46:26,630 --> 00:46:29,760 Oh, God, I am so sorry. 691 00:46:29,760 --> 00:46:31,960 That guy is such a creep. 692 00:46:31,960 --> 00:46:33,500 I didn't mean to put ya through that. 693 00:46:33,500 --> 00:46:34,730 Anyway, thanks. 694 00:46:34,730 --> 00:46:36,660 It's my pleasure, really. 695 00:46:36,660 --> 00:46:38,130 So, what's your name? 696 00:46:38,130 --> 00:46:41,200 Oh, it's Shari O'Kari. 697 00:46:41,200 --> 00:46:44,060 Is that a real name, Shari O'Kari? 698 00:46:44,060 --> 00:46:47,360 Well, actually I changed it. 699 00:46:47,360 --> 00:46:51,830 It's Suzie, Suzie Fifelfiffiff. 700 00:46:51,830 --> 00:46:54,430 I see, well, I'm Vladimina, 701 00:46:54,430 --> 00:46:57,230 and it is a pleasure to meet you. 702 00:46:57,230 --> 00:46:58,600 Well, it was really great to meet you. 703 00:46:58,600 --> 00:47:00,330 I gotta go. 704 00:47:00,330 --> 00:47:03,060 Wait, I couldn't help but notice you the other night 705 00:47:03,060 --> 00:47:04,360 on the ship's deck. 706 00:47:04,360 --> 00:47:08,760 You seem very, very distraught, very sad. 707 00:47:08,760 --> 00:47:10,730 Yeah, well, um, 708 00:47:10,730 --> 00:47:13,930 this trip hasn't exactly been the greatest. 709 00:47:13,930 --> 00:47:17,560 Well, perhaps your luck is to change. 710 00:47:17,560 --> 00:47:19,630 What do you mean? 711 00:47:19,630 --> 00:47:23,630 Well, it seems we're both searching that escapes us. 712 00:47:23,630 --> 00:47:25,160 Yeah? 713 00:47:25,160 --> 00:47:28,060 Mm, don't be worried. 714 00:47:28,060 --> 00:47:30,500 I'm not gonna force anything on you. 715 00:47:30,500 --> 00:47:36,300 I just wanna show you how we can help on another. 716 00:47:36,300 --> 00:47:40,600 * 717 00:47:40,600 --> 00:47:43,960 Come on, ya little pansy, ya sissy! 718 00:47:43,960 --> 00:47:52,100 * 719 00:47:52,100 --> 00:47:56,400 Ha, ha, ha, gotcha there, ya weakling! 720 00:47:56,400 --> 00:48:02,360 The name of this song is, "I'm a Man, Baby!" 721 00:48:02,360 --> 00:48:33,600 * 722 00:48:33,600 --> 00:48:39,900 * I got a piece of paper that says you're my girl * 723 00:48:39,900 --> 00:49:02,900 * 724 00:49:02,900 --> 00:49:08,800 * Fry me eggs in a frying pan * 725 00:49:08,800 --> 00:49:12,360 * 726 00:49:12,360 --> 00:49:16,360 * 'Cause I'm the man, baby 727 00:49:16,360 --> 00:50:43,630 * 728 00:50:43,630 --> 00:50:46,260 I am a vampire, 729 00:50:46,260 --> 00:50:51,330 and like you I, too, need a partner, 730 00:50:51,330 --> 00:50:56,060 but every being I try to convert dies. 731 00:50:56,060 --> 00:50:59,230 No one is strong enough for my gift. 732 00:50:59,230 --> 00:51:03,100 No one has a spark needed to accept it, 733 00:51:03,100 --> 00:51:07,700 and live in death. 734 00:51:07,700 --> 00:51:09,730 That's really great. 735 00:51:09,730 --> 00:51:12,300 Why me? 736 00:51:12,300 --> 00:51:15,430 When I look at you I see a being 737 00:51:15,430 --> 00:51:19,130 who surely does possess a sensitivity 738 00:51:19,130 --> 00:51:22,930 and strength needed to join me. 739 00:51:22,930 --> 00:51:24,960 We can care for one another 740 00:51:24,960 --> 00:51:27,160 till the end of time. 741 00:51:27,160 --> 00:51:30,430 Won't you join me, Suzie Fiffle? 742 00:51:30,430 --> 00:51:31,700 F-f-f 743 00:51:31,700 --> 00:51:34,060 Fifflefuff, yeah. 744 00:51:34,060 --> 00:51:38,900 Uh, can we do that to men? 745 00:51:38,900 --> 00:51:43,160 Sure. 746 00:51:43,160 --> 00:51:45,700 Um, I dunno. 747 00:51:45,700 --> 00:51:47,930 Can I get back to you? 748 00:51:47,930 --> 00:51:51,700 Sure, why don't I call your room later. 749 00:51:51,700 --> 00:51:54,360 Mm, he might answer. 750 00:51:54,360 --> 00:51:55,930 How about if I call you? 751 00:51:55,930 --> 00:51:59,060 Well, I'm in the ship's hull and there's no phone there. 752 00:51:59,060 --> 00:52:00,830 Why don't you page me? 753 00:52:00,830 --> 00:52:01,930 Do you have my pager? 754 00:52:01,930 --> 00:52:05,860 Mareem, give her the number. 755 00:52:05,860 --> 00:52:07,560 Sure, you have a pen and paper? 756 00:52:07,560 --> 00:52:09,060 Uh, no. 757 00:52:09,060 --> 00:52:10,260 Uh, excuse me, sir, 758 00:52:10,260 --> 00:52:11,760 do you have a pen and some paper? 759 00:52:11,760 --> 00:52:13,060 Sure, here it is. 760 00:52:13,060 --> 00:52:15,500 I'm on my 50 minute break. 761 00:52:19,360 --> 00:52:21,900 What? 762 00:52:21,900 --> 00:52:24,860 There's something funny about you. 763 00:52:24,860 --> 00:52:27,530 Go away, you pest, go! 764 00:52:27,530 --> 00:52:29,660 Can I have my pen and paper back? 765 00:52:29,660 --> 00:52:31,160 No! 766 00:52:31,160 --> 00:52:33,230 You have four, four, two, two. 767 00:52:33,230 --> 00:52:36,560 It's four, four, two, one. 768 00:52:36,560 --> 00:52:39,060 Yeah. 769 00:52:39,060 --> 00:52:39,730 Here, thanks a lot. 770 00:52:39,730 --> 00:52:41,960 No problem. 771 00:52:51,860 --> 00:52:53,730 Does this pager work at sea? 772 00:52:53,730 --> 00:52:57,600 It's an 800 number, it works all over the world. 773 00:52:57,600 --> 00:53:02,730 Please consider my offer, it'll be great fun, really. 774 00:53:02,730 --> 00:53:05,460 Oh, I will, I just I need to get some sleep. 775 00:53:05,460 --> 00:53:09,560 It's been, like, a really weird day. 776 00:53:09,560 --> 00:53:14,530 It was really nice meeting all of yous, bye. 777 00:53:14,530 --> 00:53:15,660 Bye, bye now. 778 00:53:15,660 --> 00:53:17,600 Bye. 779 00:53:17,600 --> 00:53:19,730 She's a great girl 780 00:53:19,730 --> 00:53:22,230 with a terrific set of jugs. 781 00:53:22,230 --> 00:53:25,130 Man, did you catch 782 00:53:25,130 --> 00:53:27,900 Yeah, well, bring that one with the pen, 783 00:53:27,900 --> 00:53:30,600 take him to my den. 784 00:53:30,600 --> 00:53:37,760 * 785 00:53:37,760 --> 00:53:39,460 * Lick me, stick me 786 00:53:39,460 --> 00:53:45,760 * Don't call me late for the orgy, baby, yeah * 787 00:53:45,760 --> 00:53:47,530 * Lick me, stick me 788 00:53:47,530 --> 00:53:53,860 * Don't wake me late of the orgy, baby, yeah * 789 00:53:53,860 --> 00:53:55,460 * Right 790 00:54:07,060 --> 00:54:11,930 It's wood time, sister! 791 00:54:11,930 --> 00:54:15,260 Ah! 792 00:54:15,260 --> 00:54:18,060 Oh! 793 00:54:18,060 --> 00:54:19,700 Did you feel that? 794 00:54:19,700 --> 00:54:21,130 Get outta here. 795 00:54:21,130 --> 00:54:23,830 I said to the kid, "It's bigger than yours!" 796 00:54:23,830 --> 00:54:26,630 Bigger than yours. 797 00:54:26,630 --> 00:54:33,100 * 798 00:54:33,100 --> 00:54:37,200 Nice try, chum boy. 799 00:54:37,200 --> 00:54:40,660 I'll lick you yet, you, you, 800 00:54:40,660 --> 00:54:44,060 you two-bit penny-ante 801 00:54:44,060 --> 00:54:47,830 lesbian vampire from purgatory, 802 00:54:47,830 --> 00:54:50,200 and I'll put an end to your evil, 803 00:54:50,200 --> 00:54:54,400 and erotic, and sensual, and seductive ways 804 00:54:54,400 --> 00:54:57,230 which are quite fun to watch, 805 00:54:57,230 --> 00:55:02,930 but are pure unadulterated evil nevertheless. 806 00:55:02,930 --> 00:55:06,330 First of all, I'm not from purgatory, 807 00:55:06,330 --> 00:55:08,530 I'm from Staten Island. 808 00:55:08,530 --> 00:55:13,830 Secondly, no one has ever licked me before, 809 00:55:13,830 --> 00:55:15,600 at least not that way. 810 00:55:15,600 --> 00:55:20,160 Besides, would you really want to destroy, 811 00:55:20,160 --> 00:55:25,260 for all eternity, someone who can do this? 812 00:55:29,960 --> 00:55:34,760 And this? 813 00:55:34,760 --> 00:55:38,400 Holy moly! 814 00:55:38,400 --> 00:55:42,360 Oh, and I almost forgot this. 815 00:55:54,330 --> 00:56:00,200 Ha, ha, I've broken free from your seductive clutches, 816 00:56:00,200 --> 00:56:04,700 you scrumptious lesbian vampire. 817 00:56:04,700 --> 00:56:10,300 You're going down. 818 00:56:10,300 --> 00:56:11,930 Ouch! 819 00:56:11,930 --> 00:56:18,730 * 820 00:56:18,730 --> 00:56:20,100 What now? 821 00:56:20,100 --> 00:56:22,860 This ship is going to sink like a rock. 822 00:56:22,860 --> 00:56:24,400 * 823 00:56:24,400 --> 00:56:29,800 Oh, we must save Suzie Fiffle-f-f-fFifflefife. 824 00:56:29,800 --> 00:56:32,060 All right, now, kids, here's a number one song 825 00:56:32,060 --> 00:56:37,630 from Glitter Bolan, "Fairy's Gave Me Boots." 826 00:56:37,630 --> 00:56:42,260 I'm so bored waiting for that captain man of mine. 827 00:56:42,260 --> 00:56:48,500 I'm going to give him a piece of my mind. 828 00:56:48,500 --> 00:56:50,760 What the shit? 829 00:56:50,760 --> 00:56:52,800 There's water everywhere. 830 00:56:52,800 --> 00:56:54,660 Oh. 831 00:56:54,660 --> 00:57:07,730 * 832 00:57:07,730 --> 00:57:10,230 Ha, ha, ha, Prince? 833 00:57:10,230 --> 00:57:12,130 You sure it ain't Princess? 834 00:57:12,130 --> 00:57:14,230 Ya pee sittin' down, or what? 835 00:57:14,230 --> 00:57:17,060 Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! 836 00:57:17,060 --> 00:57:28,630 * 837 00:57:28,630 --> 00:57:29,560 Oh, my god! 838 00:57:29,560 --> 00:57:33,630 Oh, oh. 839 00:57:33,630 --> 00:57:35,860 What am I gonna do? 840 00:57:35,860 --> 00:57:38,230 Wait a second, yeah. 841 00:57:58,300 --> 00:58:00,500 Oh. 842 00:58:00,500 --> 00:58:03,060 Ah, ha, ha, oh. 843 00:58:03,060 --> 00:58:11,160 * 844 00:58:11,160 --> 00:58:13,600 * Don't call me late for the orgy * 845 00:58:13,600 --> 00:58:17,100 Hey, pal, watch it, I'm flat here. 846 00:58:17,100 --> 00:58:19,500 Baby, baby, I'm so glad I found you. 847 00:58:19,500 --> 00:58:21,400 There's this vampire lesbian queen 848 00:58:21,400 --> 00:58:24,860 who's trying to make me her undying companion. 849 00:58:24,860 --> 00:58:28,430 I justI don't know what to do. 850 00:58:28,430 --> 00:58:31,560 Go get some booze, it's on the house, eh? 851 00:58:31,560 --> 00:58:32,900 I gotta go pee! 852 00:58:32,900 --> 00:58:35,130 Rock and roll! 853 00:58:35,130 --> 00:58:38,900 Rock and roll, baby, yeah! 854 00:58:38,900 --> 00:58:41,100 Yeah, baby! 855 00:58:41,100 --> 00:58:43,060 Captain, captain, my love. 856 00:58:43,060 --> 00:58:44,500 Oh, captain. 857 00:58:44,500 --> 00:58:47,600 Mr. Pussington, get this deranged women outta here. 858 00:58:47,600 --> 00:58:49,260 Yes, sir. 859 00:58:49,260 --> 00:58:51,760 Oh, wait, listen, listen, you must listen to me. 860 00:58:51,760 --> 00:58:54,700 Okay, I'll take it from here. 861 00:58:54,700 --> 00:58:57,430 Beaner, I told you never to come here. 862 00:58:57,430 --> 00:58:59,100 Yes, but the whole bottom of the ship 863 00:58:59,100 --> 00:59:00,960 is filled with water, the ship is sinking. 864 00:59:00,960 --> 00:59:01,930 What the hell are you talking about? 865 00:59:01,930 --> 00:59:03,100 Have you been using 866 00:59:03,100 --> 00:59:04,700 the vibrator in your ear again? 867 00:59:04,700 --> 00:59:06,860 I told you never to do that. 868 00:59:06,860 --> 00:59:08,330 Excuse me, sir, but it's Mr. Smythe, 869 00:59:08,330 --> 00:59:09,800 he says it's urgent. 870 00:59:09,800 --> 00:59:11,900 Oh, not now! 871 00:59:11,900 --> 00:59:13,160 He says it's urgent. 872 00:59:13,160 --> 00:59:15,200 Something about a rip in the hull or something. 873 00:59:15,200 --> 00:59:16,160 I didn't quite catch it all, 874 00:59:16,160 --> 00:59:18,830 but he's quite panicked. 875 00:59:18,830 --> 00:59:19,700 Give me that! 876 00:59:19,700 --> 00:59:21,230 Hello? 877 00:59:21,230 --> 00:59:24,160 Captain, this is Smythe, we have a serious problem. 878 00:59:24,160 --> 00:59:26,200 I'm in the ships' hull. 879 00:59:26,200 --> 00:59:28,100 We are taking on water. 880 00:59:28,100 --> 00:59:31,460 I repeat, we are taking on water. 881 00:59:31,460 --> 00:59:33,200 I tried to call the board room to warn them, 882 00:59:33,200 --> 00:59:35,300 but nobody would pick up. 883 00:59:35,300 --> 00:59:38,600 * 884 00:59:38,600 --> 00:59:41,400 And Willy's down here, too, and he's dead. 885 00:59:41,400 --> 00:59:43,300 He's probably just drunk. 886 00:59:43,300 --> 00:59:45,730 No, he's dead, I'm quite sure. 887 00:59:45,730 --> 00:59:48,230 Kick him a couple of times, he'll come around. 888 00:59:48,230 --> 00:59:49,660 It doesn't matter, look, it's imperative 889 00:59:49,660 --> 00:59:52,330 that we begin an immediate evacuation of the ship. 890 00:59:52,330 --> 00:59:53,860 We have an hour, or maybe even less 891 00:59:53,860 --> 00:59:55,430 before we go down! 892 00:59:55,430 --> 00:59:56,430 Are you sure? 893 00:59:56,430 --> 00:59:57,100 Yes! 894 00:59:57,100 --> 00:59:58,300 No way to stop it? 895 00:59:58,300 --> 00:59:59,060 No! 896 00:59:59,060 --> 01:00:00,700 Can you give me another hour? 897 01:00:00,700 --> 01:00:02,230 No, now get to it, 898 01:00:02,230 --> 01:00:06,800 you drunken two sheets to the wind South stone fart! 899 01:00:06,800 --> 01:00:10,100 Oh! 900 01:00:10,100 --> 01:00:11,630 What is it, sir? 901 01:00:11,630 --> 01:00:18,030 * 902 01:00:18,030 --> 01:00:19,400 The ship is sinking 903 01:00:19,400 --> 01:00:20,730 and we're all gonna drown in an hour. 904 01:00:20,730 --> 01:00:21,930 Don't panic. 905 01:00:21,930 --> 01:00:27,030 * 906 01:00:27,030 --> 01:00:28,730 Wait, come back, show me how 907 01:00:28,730 --> 01:00:30,830 to use this radio so I can call for help. 908 01:00:30,830 --> 01:00:34,100 Ah, screw 'em all, let them be drowned like rats! 909 01:00:34,100 --> 01:00:36,430 Well, Beaner, my love, 910 01:00:36,430 --> 01:00:37,730 looks like it's just you and me to the end of this line. 911 01:00:37,730 --> 01:00:40,030 Oh, the hell with that, I'm getting out of here. 912 01:00:40,030 --> 01:00:42,330 Beaner, wait, in spite of all the times 913 01:00:42,330 --> 01:00:44,230 that I've pushed you away from me 914 01:00:44,230 --> 01:00:47,260 I'm askin' ya, no, I'm beggin' ya now, 915 01:00:47,260 --> 01:00:51,130 please, Beaner, my love, don't leave me. 916 01:00:51,130 --> 01:00:53,530 Captain, captain, my love, 917 01:00:53,530 --> 01:00:55,860 I won't leave you, not till the bitter end. 918 01:00:55,860 --> 01:00:57,600 Oh, that's a good girl. 919 01:00:57,600 --> 01:01:00,160 Thank you, Beaner, my love, thank you. 920 01:01:00,160 --> 01:01:01,060 Now, take off your clothes. 921 01:01:01,060 --> 01:01:02,230 Captain! 922 01:01:02,230 --> 01:01:03,960 Drop your laundry, we have an hour. 923 01:01:03,960 --> 01:01:06,630 Oh, you little devil. 924 01:01:06,630 --> 01:01:17,800 * 925 01:01:17,800 --> 01:01:21,160 The ship is sinking! 926 01:01:21,160 --> 01:01:22,700 Run for your lives! 927 01:01:22,700 --> 01:01:24,360 Ah, ah! 928 01:01:24,360 --> 01:01:27,530 * 929 01:01:27,530 --> 01:01:30,660 Oh, oh, so, you really wanna wrestle, eh? 930 01:01:30,660 --> 01:01:32,700 Ha, ha, yeehaw! 931 01:01:32,700 --> 01:01:35,800 Woo, ha, ha, ha, yeehaw! 932 01:01:35,800 --> 01:01:38,260 Woo! 933 01:01:38,260 --> 01:01:42,530 Yeehaw, woo, ha, ha, ha, ha! 934 01:01:42,530 --> 01:01:45,060 Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, what's a matter now? 935 01:01:45,060 --> 01:01:46,200 What's a matter? 936 01:01:46,200 --> 01:01:47,200 The amps are gonna get wet. 937 01:01:47,200 --> 01:01:48,560 The boat is sinking, man. 938 01:01:48,560 --> 01:01:51,160 Fuck the boat, the amps, and the people, man, come on. 939 01:01:51,160 --> 01:01:53,660 We're playin' the best gigs of our lives. 940 01:01:53,660 --> 01:01:56,760 Keep playing. 941 01:01:56,760 --> 01:01:57,560 All right. 942 01:01:57,560 --> 01:01:59,200 Right, all right! 943 01:01:59,200 --> 01:02:00,560 Fucking piss-heads. 944 01:02:00,560 --> 01:02:11,100 * 945 01:02:11,100 --> 01:02:13,100 Oh, no, she's not here. 946 01:02:13,100 --> 01:02:14,200 Now, what do we do? 947 01:02:14,200 --> 01:02:15,330 We'll have to split up. 948 01:02:15,330 --> 01:02:16,200 You two go that way, 949 01:02:16,200 --> 01:02:17,430 I'll go this way. 950 01:02:17,430 --> 01:02:18,530 Okay. 951 01:02:18,530 --> 01:02:22,060 * 952 01:02:22,060 --> 01:02:24,660 Come on, come on! 953 01:02:24,660 --> 01:02:50,100 * 954 01:02:50,100 --> 01:02:51,660 Miss, you all right? 955 01:02:51,660 --> 01:02:56,800 * 956 01:02:56,800 --> 01:02:57,630 Fuck! 957 01:02:57,630 --> 01:03:11,730 * 958 01:03:11,730 --> 01:03:13,160 Oh, come on, man! 959 01:03:13,160 --> 01:03:16,100 We all gotta hurry up and get on that helicopter. 960 01:03:16,100 --> 01:03:17,960 No, I cannot. 961 01:03:17,960 --> 01:03:20,430 I cannot leave my love. 962 01:03:20,430 --> 01:03:22,100 * 963 01:03:22,100 --> 01:03:25,460 I cannot leave my love either! 964 01:03:25,460 --> 01:03:27,160 * 965 01:03:27,160 --> 01:03:31,500 John, John, you cannot go back there and drown! 966 01:03:31,500 --> 01:03:32,830 * 967 01:03:32,830 --> 01:03:34,560 Ah, fuck him! 968 01:03:34,560 --> 01:03:35,800 All right. 969 01:03:35,800 --> 01:04:29,060 * 970 01:04:29,060 --> 01:04:32,060 Ah, couldn't eat another thing. 971 01:04:32,060 --> 01:04:34,060 Oh, what a horrible way to die. 972 01:04:34,060 --> 01:04:35,730 Drowning at sea. 973 01:04:35,730 --> 01:04:36,800 Horrible? 974 01:04:36,800 --> 01:04:38,130 Why, I've never felt more alive 975 01:04:38,130 --> 01:04:40,700 than when I've been in the embrace of the sea. 976 01:04:40,700 --> 01:04:43,300 And in your pants, of course. 977 01:04:43,300 --> 01:04:46,100 Oh, captain, I have a confession to make. 978 01:04:46,100 --> 01:04:47,700 What is it? 979 01:04:47,700 --> 01:04:49,760 I'm a man, and my name Ralph. 980 01:04:49,760 --> 01:04:51,400 Uh-huh, uh, okay, 981 01:04:51,400 --> 01:04:55,730 First, the wheel, then the ship, and now? 982 01:04:55,730 --> 01:04:57,630 -Ralph. -Banging Ralph. 983 01:04:57,630 --> 01:05:01,730 Whoa, right yourself, Ralph, this is it. 984 01:05:01,730 --> 01:05:09,100 * 985 01:05:09,100 --> 01:05:11,260 Yeehaw! 986 01:05:11,260 --> 01:05:26,200 * 987 01:05:26,200 --> 01:05:28,960 Goodbye, my love. 988 01:05:28,960 --> 01:05:32,460 Goodbye, my love, goodbye. 989 01:05:32,460 --> 01:06:36,060 * 990 01:06:36,060 --> 01:06:38,160 Oh, my god, what do we do now? 991 01:06:38,160 --> 01:06:40,100 I've gotta get you out of here. 992 01:06:40,100 --> 01:06:41,300 We're gonna have to swim for it. 993 01:06:41,300 --> 01:06:42,960 We better take our dresses off. 994 01:06:42,960 --> 01:06:46,060 It'll be easier. 995 01:06:46,060 --> 01:06:49,660 Um, my dress already came off somehow. 996 01:06:49,660 --> 01:06:52,200 Oh, don't you look good. 997 01:06:52,200 --> 01:06:53,900 All right, take a deep breath 998 01:06:53,900 --> 01:06:55,730 and follow me. 999 01:06:55,730 --> 01:06:59,600 Okay. 1000 01:06:59,600 --> 01:09:15,360 * 1001 01:09:15,360 --> 01:09:16,660 Well, look who made it 1002 01:09:16,660 --> 01:09:20,300 with their natural flotation devices. 1003 01:09:20,300 --> 01:09:24,960 Will, you shut up, you drunken excuse for a life boat! 1004 01:09:24,960 --> 01:09:26,400 Unless you want my paddle 1005 01:09:26,400 --> 01:09:27,500 embedded in your breast plate 1006 01:09:27,500 --> 01:09:33,100 so kindly move the fuck out of my way! 1007 01:09:33,100 --> 01:09:36,200 Oh, look at that pathetic soul. 1008 01:09:36,200 --> 01:09:39,860 You're not anything like these people. 1009 01:09:39,860 --> 01:09:42,100 Listen to the cries in the distance. 1010 01:09:42,100 --> 01:09:44,130 Thousands are going to drown, 1011 01:09:44,130 --> 01:09:48,060 but you have a choice. 1012 01:09:48,060 --> 01:09:51,560 You're my chosen one. 1013 01:09:51,560 --> 01:09:55,700 We could be happy for eternity. 1014 01:09:55,700 --> 01:09:57,360 Won't you join me? 1015 01:09:57,360 --> 01:09:59,660 I can make you very happy. 1016 01:09:59,660 --> 01:10:01,960 * Yeah 1017 01:10:05,900 --> 01:10:07,060 What do I have to do? 1018 01:10:07,060 --> 01:10:11,600 Just relax and lie back. 1019 01:10:11,600 --> 01:10:39,100 * 1020 01:10:39,100 --> 01:10:42,030 Hey, is that you, Shari? 1021 01:10:42,030 --> 01:10:44,730 Get over here! 1022 01:10:44,730 --> 01:10:49,030 Get ovwell, isn't that lovely? 1023 01:10:49,030 --> 01:10:52,030 I can't reach that tonight. 1024 01:10:52,030 --> 01:11:33,130 * 1025 01:11:33,130 --> 01:11:36,160 Mareem, look, the boss 1026 01:11:36,160 --> 01:11:38,700 has finally found love! 1027 01:11:38,700 --> 01:11:41,330 Ha, ha, ha, ha! 1028 01:11:41,330 --> 01:11:44,360 We must go now to Staten Island 1029 01:11:44,360 --> 01:11:46,430 to prepare the mistresses' lair. 1030 01:11:46,430 --> 01:11:49,660 We must go, go, like the rabid werewolves 1031 01:11:49,660 --> 01:11:53,360 over the fog's crowded moors of one... 1032 01:11:56,060 --> 01:11:57,230 Look at that. 1033 01:11:57,230 --> 01:11:59,230 Ha, ha, ha, I'll tell ya something, 1034 01:11:59,230 --> 01:12:00,530 I never had this kind of fun 1035 01:12:00,530 --> 01:12:02,630 working for Dr. Frankenstein. 1036 01:12:02,630 --> 01:12:07,260 Ha, ha, ha, ha, come on, big boy, let's split. 1037 01:12:07,260 --> 01:12:10,330 * 1038 01:12:10,330 --> 01:12:13,100 Oh, my, I see things so differently. 1039 01:12:13,100 --> 01:12:15,460 I feel like I'm flying. 1040 01:12:15,460 --> 01:12:18,200 Oh, we can fly. 1041 01:12:18,200 --> 01:12:21,400 You'll be able to do a lot of cool things now. 1042 01:12:21,400 --> 01:12:24,960 Just think, no more hangovers, 1043 01:12:24,960 --> 01:12:27,130 no more bad hair days. 1044 01:12:27,130 --> 01:12:30,160 Oh, wow, no more bad hair days? 1045 01:12:30,160 --> 01:12:33,060 No more bad rock star boyfriends? 1046 01:12:33,060 --> 01:12:36,560 We're gonna have so much fun. 1047 01:12:36,560 --> 01:12:41,360 * 1048 01:13:03,230 --> 01:13:08,860 I claim this land for England! 1049 01:13:11,860 --> 01:13:14,560 Where's the booze? 1050 01:13:14,560 --> 01:17:04,330 * 1051 01:17:04,330 --> 01:17:07,400 Captioned by Video Caption Corporation www.vicaps.com 1051 01:17:08,305 --> 01:18:08,734 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org