The Gunfighter

1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 2 00:00:35,800 --> 00:00:38,119 The weary gunfighter walked slowly 3 00:00:38,120 --> 00:00:40,679 through the saloon. The long miles from 4 00:00:40,680 --> 00:00:43,479 Cheyenne had taken their toll. 5 00:00:43,480 --> 00:00:45,999 - Who's saying that stuff? - He scanned the room 6 00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:48,839 with a suspicious eye. Years of being on 7 00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:51,119 the wrong side of the law had taught him 8 00:00:51,120 --> 00:00:53,038 that a tough man can get out of a 9 00:00:53,039 --> 00:00:55,479 situation, but a smart man never gets 10 00:00:55,480 --> 00:00:57,599 - himself into one. - Please quit doing that 11 00:00:57,600 --> 00:00:59,479 I just want to have a shot of whiskey in peace. 12 00:00:59,480 --> 00:01:02,159 But the gunfighter would find no peace. 13 00:01:02,160 --> 00:01:04,079 For the Henderson boys were 14 00:01:04,080 --> 00:01:05,919 waiting in the corner to kill him for 15 00:01:05,920 --> 00:01:10,399 - the $200 bounty on his head. - Is that true? 16 00:01:10,400 --> 00:01:12,919 You boys trying to kill me like 17 00:01:12,920 --> 00:01:16,158 this voice is saying? 18 00:01:16,159 --> 00:01:19,879 - Uh no. - Lied the oldest Henderson boy. 19 00:01:19,880 --> 00:01:21,279 How do you know I'm lying? 20 00:01:21,280 --> 00:01:23,758 The oldest Henderson boy asked the air. 21 00:01:23,759 --> 00:01:26,779 No, I didn't ask the air, I'm asking you, you fuckin .. 22 00:01:26,780 --> 00:01:29,539 - voice. - Said the oldest Henderson boy. 23 00:01:29,640 --> 00:01:31,319 Would you please stop saying 24 00:01:31,320 --> 00:01:34,519 - the oldest Henderson boy? - Implored Tommy, 25 00:01:34,520 --> 00:01:37,279 the oldest Henderson boy. Meanwhile the 26 00:01:37,280 --> 00:01:39,359 younger Henderson's hand twitched by the 27 00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:41,798 Colt Peacemaker on his right hip. 28 00:01:41,799 --> 00:01:43,679 He was thinking of shouting LOOK OUT BEHIND YOU! 29 00:01:43,680 --> 00:01:45,398 to trick the gunfighter into turning 30 00:01:45,399 --> 00:01:47,438 around so he could shoot him in the back. 31 00:01:47,439 --> 00:01:49,339 - No, I was not. - Come on Johnny, again with 32 00:01:49,340 --> 00:01:51,039 the look behind you. What were you going 33 00:01:51,040 --> 00:01:53,519 to say was behind him this time? 34 00:01:53,520 --> 00:01:56,199 - Nothing - Johnny lied. He was going to say a bear. 35 00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:59,999 Oh come on. bear, Johnny. 36 00:02:00,000 --> 00:02:02,959 - A bear in a saloon? - Johnny's face turned red he began 37 00:02:02,960 --> 00:02:05,999 wishing he was in a safe place at home. 38 00:02:06,000 --> 00:02:08,559 In bed with his dolls. 39 00:02:08,560 --> 00:02:11,999 What? Hey hey I ain't got no dolls! 40 00:02:12,000 --> 00:02:14,079 To calm his nerves he pictured himself 41 00:02:14,080 --> 00:02:16,559 combing his doll's hair and pouring 42 00:02:16,560 --> 00:02:19,818 - them each a cup of tea. - No. 43 00:02:20,119 --> 00:02:23,959 Wait, you have tea parties with your dolls? 44 00:02:24,760 --> 00:02:27,039 But something about the younger Henderson's 45 00:02:27,040 --> 00:02:29,079 vulnerability opened a door in the 46 00:02:29,080 --> 00:02:30,359 gunfighter's heart. 47 00:02:30,360 --> 00:02:33,518 - Nope, no it didn't. - Inside, a sea of 48 00:02:33,519 --> 00:02:35,479 confusing emotions bubbled to the surface. 49 00:02:35,480 --> 00:02:38,119 - No. - He started imagining himself 50 00:02:38,120 --> 00:02:39,919 holding the younger Henderson and 51 00:02:39,920 --> 00:02:42,759 - stroking his greasy hair. - No. 52 00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:44,399 He imagined his first kiss with 53 00:02:44,400 --> 00:02:46,839 the younger Henderson. They both giggle at how clumsy 54 00:02:46,840 --> 00:02:48,799 it was. They know the next one will be 55 00:02:48,800 --> 00:02:51,039 - even better. - I'm seriously not picturing that. 56 00:02:51,040 --> 00:02:53,679 - But inside he was. - No I'm not. 57 00:02:53,680 --> 00:02:56,238 - But he was. - No I'm not, and that's the final word. 58 00:03:07,400 --> 00:03:11,079 - But he was. - God damn it! 59 00:03:11,080 --> 00:03:14,518 - Why don't you two get a room? - Hey! Why should we trust this voice anyway? 60 00:03:14,519 --> 00:03:16,518 Just then the gunfighter 61 00:03:16,519 --> 00:03:19,559 - had an idea. - Hey you! 62 00:03:19,560 --> 00:03:22,079 - Me? - Think of a number between one and 100, 63 00:03:22,080 --> 00:03:24,198 and then we'll see if this voice really knows 64 00:03:24,199 --> 00:03:27,239 - what we're thinking, okay? - OK, got it. 65 00:03:27,240 --> 00:03:30,439 Sally the whore then began thinking of her favorite 66 00:03:30,440 --> 00:03:32,199 number which was 32. She then thought of 67 00:03:32,200 --> 00:03:34,318 her lady parts and how itchy they were 68 00:03:34,319 --> 00:03:36,119 before deciding to change her mind and 69 00:03:36,120 --> 00:03:39,598 go with 76, her second favorite number. 70 00:03:39,599 --> 00:03:43,158 The voice is right! 32 is my favorite 71 00:03:43,159 --> 00:03:45,119 number but then I changed my mind I went 72 00:03:45,120 --> 00:03:48,018 - with 76. - And your cooch? 73 00:03:48,019 --> 00:03:50,818 It's been itching something horrible since Saturday, Bill. 74 00:03:50,819 --> 00:03:55,159 - You know anything about that? - He did, but 75 00:03:55,560 --> 00:03:57,539 we'll get to that in a minute. 76 00:03:57,540 --> 00:03:59,659 Looks like that voice really does know everything. 77 00:03:59,660 --> 00:04:01,479 The gunfighter noticed for 78 00:04:01,480 --> 00:04:03,518 the first time that the bartender was black. 79 00:04:03,519 --> 00:04:06,399 This was still unusual in the West 80 00:04:06,400 --> 00:04:08,798 but the gunfighter decided he was okay with it. 81 00:04:08,799 --> 00:04:13,158 - Thanks. - The people in the town 82 00:04:13,159 --> 00:04:14,958 prided themselves for their progressive 83 00:04:14,959 --> 00:04:17,338 - attitudes about race. - That's right. 84 00:04:17,339 --> 00:04:19,399 But would they still feel that way if they knew 85 00:04:19,400 --> 00:04:21,478 Sam had been sleeping with Ned Schilling's wife? 86 00:04:21,479 --> 00:04:25,758 - What? - Relax, Ned. 87 00:04:25,759 --> 00:04:29,119 I mean everyone has been with her. 88 00:04:29,120 --> 00:04:32,879 - Guilty. - Yeah, you're right. 89 00:04:32,880 --> 00:04:37,119 - And Elijah Jessup's sister. - Well Sam... 90 00:04:37,120 --> 00:04:39,879 Watch yourself Jessup, You best put that gun down, 91 00:04:39,880 --> 00:04:43,479 or I'll cut you in half. 92 00:04:48,120 --> 00:04:51,579 That music, seems kind of ominous don't it? 93 00:04:51,780 --> 00:04:54,918 - Ominous, what's that mean? - You know like 94 00:04:54,919 --> 00:04:56,519 something bad's about to happen. 95 00:04:56,520 --> 00:04:59,119 Like a needless gun fight. 96 00:04:59,120 --> 00:05:01,918 The stage was set for an awesome ballet of death. 97 00:05:01,919 --> 00:05:04,399 Blood would be spilled. But who would be 98 00:05:04,400 --> 00:05:06,758 - the first? - Wait! A ballet of death? 99 00:05:06,759 --> 00:05:09,359 What the hell? I think this 100 00:05:09,360 --> 00:05:11,559 voice wants us to kill each other. 101 00:05:11,560 --> 00:05:13,679 Meanwhile, the gunfighter saw his opening 102 00:05:13,680 --> 00:05:16,119 - to shoot Tommy dead. - No no no no. Wait. 103 00:05:16,120 --> 00:05:17,959 That one really is a lie. See, my 104 00:05:17,960 --> 00:05:20,519 - hand's nowhere near my gun. - Okay, you got me. 105 00:05:20,520 --> 00:05:23,439 That one wasn't true. But this one is. 106 00:05:23,440 --> 00:05:25,439 Yesterday, Tommy Henderson made sweet 107 00:05:25,440 --> 00:05:29,119 - love to Bill Jessup's wife. - No! You made 108 00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:30,959 sweet love to Mama? 109 00:05:30,960 --> 00:05:34,519 Here's the thing about that. 110 00:05:34,520 --> 00:05:37,159 - Oh, you're dead Henderson. - Said Gabriel, who 111 00:05:37,160 --> 00:05:39,079 had recently delivered a load of cream 112 00:05:39,080 --> 00:05:42,679 to the back porch of his brother's wife. 113 00:05:42,680 --> 00:05:46,079 He did her in the butt. 114 00:05:46,080 --> 00:05:48,439 - How could you? Your own brother? - Yet, even as Bill 115 00:05:48,440 --> 00:05:51,279 reacted with disgust the irony was 116 00:05:51,280 --> 00:05:53,999 - not lost on him. - You know what, I see, oh 117 00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:55,799 where you going with this, and I'm just 118 00:05:55,800 --> 00:05:58,039 going to retract my disgust right now 119 00:05:58,040 --> 00:05:59,638 - if that's possible. - For he had been 120 00:05:59,639 --> 00:06:01,918 regularly sneaking into Paul Valentine's barn. 121 00:06:01,919 --> 00:06:04,758 Okay, you know, we're good. We're good here. 122 00:06:04,759 --> 00:06:07,799 I think we should just ... move on. 123 00:06:07,800 --> 00:06:09,879 Where he'd been having sex with Paul's 124 00:06:09,880 --> 00:06:14,198 - favorite sheep Martha. - Oh boy. - Martha, Bill? 125 00:06:14,199 --> 00:06:17,598 That is why I've been so itchy? 126 00:06:17,599 --> 00:06:19,478 You know what? We all just need to take a 127 00:06:19,479 --> 00:06:22,359 deep breath here. We're playing right to 128 00:06:22,360 --> 00:06:24,638 the voice's hand. Sure, there's been a 129 00:06:24,639 --> 00:06:26,519 surprising amount of infidelity in this town. 130 00:06:26,520 --> 00:06:29,859 And the beastiality should probably stop. 131 00:06:30,161 --> 00:06:32,559 And I might be gay. But if we start shooting. 132 00:06:32,560 --> 00:06:35,519 The voice wins. I think the 133 00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:37,559 voice has given us an opportunity. 134 00:06:37,560 --> 00:06:39,679 In a world where our deepest, darkest secrets 135 00:06:39,680 --> 00:06:42,439 are unveiled one by one, maybe we'll stop 136 00:06:42,440 --> 00:06:44,719 doing the things we're ashamed of. 137 00:06:44,720 --> 00:06:46,478 And start to embrace the things about 138 00:06:46,479 --> 00:06:48,438 ourselves we're afraid to accept. 139 00:06:48,439 --> 00:06:50,179 Hell, this could be the beginning of a new 140 00:06:50,180 --> 00:06:53,839 Utopia; a society based on fairness and 141 00:06:53,840 --> 00:06:55,598 tolerance. Where it don't matter if 142 00:06:55,599 --> 00:06:58,758 - you're rich or poor or - Or a woman! 143 00:06:58,759 --> 00:07:01,399 Let's not get carried away. But the point is 144 00:07:01,400 --> 00:07:03,318 that the voice is showing us the worst 145 00:07:03,319 --> 00:07:05,598 side of ourselves and we need to show it 146 00:07:05,599 --> 00:07:08,690 our best now who's with it? 147 00:07:11,800 --> 00:07:14,598 It was a good speech and things 148 00:07:14,599 --> 00:07:16,559 might have turned out differently if the 149 00:07:16,560 --> 00:07:18,318 crowd never found out that the 150 00:07:18,319 --> 00:07:20,959 gunfighter had just last night shot and 151 00:07:20,960 --> 00:07:22,918 killed the youngest son of John 152 00:07:22,919 --> 00:07:25,598 McCullers because he quote had some 153 00:07:25,599 --> 00:07:27,719 breath that smelled like the ass end of 154 00:07:27,720 --> 00:07:30,230 a Chinaman. 155 00:07:32,560 --> 00:07:35,840 Well, you must be Mr McCullers. 156 00:07:50,039 --> 00:07:53,679 It was a true ballet of death. 157 00:07:53,680 --> 00:07:56,559 When the gruesome blood bath was over 158 00:07:56,560 --> 00:08:00,239 not a single person was left standing. 159 00:08:00,240 --> 00:08:04,519 Except for Sally, the itchy whore. 160 00:08:04,520 --> 00:08:07,519 Who celebrated by scratching 161 00:08:07,520 --> 00:08:09,638 her front porch. 162 00:08:09,639 --> 00:08:12,239 Little did she know she would be 163 00:08:12,240 --> 00:08:15,038 mauled to death by a rabid wolf the very next day. 164 00:08:15,039 --> 00:08:18,040 Well, fuck. 164 00:08:19,305 --> 00:09:19,917