Nuked

1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Watch Online Movies and Series for FREE www.osdb.link/lm 2 00:00:39,039 --> 00:00:41,208 <i>Hello, hello, hello!</i> 3 00:00:41,241 --> 00:00:42,577 <i>Welcome to the show</i> <i>where we talk</i> 4 00:00:42,610 --> 00:00:44,646 <i>about all the stuff</i> <i>in marriages</i> 5 00:00:44,679 --> 00:00:46,079 <i>that no one else will,</i> 6 00:00:46,113 --> 00:00:48,348 <i>and usually</i> <i>in a graphic manner.</i> 7 00:00:48,382 --> 00:00:52,219 <i>I'm your loyal host,</i> <i>Gill, with a G, Langer,</i> 8 00:00:52,252 --> 00:00:54,822 <i>and I will be your guide</i> <i>on this journey</i> 9 00:00:54,856 --> 00:00:56,256 <i>of self-discovery.</i> 10 00:00:56,290 --> 00:00:58,793 <i>We have one of our favorite</i> <i>guests joining us.</i> 11 00:00:58,826 --> 00:01:01,996 <i>She's definitely</i> <i>one of my favorites.</i> 12 00:01:02,030 --> 00:01:03,565 <i>You know her. You love her.</i> 13 00:01:03,598 --> 00:01:06,199 <i>That's right, folks.</i> <i>Dr. Greta.</i> 14 00:01:06,233 --> 00:01:08,101 <i>She is back to teach us</i> 15 00:01:08,135 --> 00:01:10,738 <i>how to talk dirty</i> <i>in the bedroom.</i> 16 00:01:12,072 --> 00:01:13,808 <i>And can I just say</i> <i>that I am so ready?</i> 17 00:01:13,841 --> 00:01:16,878 <i>Because if I have to have</i> <i>any more scheduled sex</i> 18 00:01:16,911 --> 00:01:18,378 <i>in order to make a baby,</i> 19 00:01:18,412 --> 00:01:20,982 <i>somebody's gonna lose</i> <i>their fucking mind,</i> 20 00:01:21,015 --> 00:01:22,650 <i>and that someone is me.</i> 21 00:01:22,684 --> 00:01:25,820 Make me your little fucking cum slut. 22 00:01:25,853 --> 00:01:27,287 Oh my God. 23 00:01:27,321 --> 00:01:30,157 Yeah! 24 00:02:00,354 --> 00:02:02,255 ...fucking me. Oh, fuck! 25 00:02:07,862 --> 00:02:10,297 If that didn't make a baby, I don't know what will. 26 00:02:10,330 --> 00:02:12,066 That was good, right? 27 00:02:13,501 --> 00:02:15,103 It was, uh... 28 00:02:16,269 --> 00:02:18,573 That dirty talk was new. 29 00:02:18,606 --> 00:02:21,075 Yeah, I learned it from the sexologist 30 00:02:21,109 --> 00:02:23,143 that we had on the show last week. 31 00:02:23,176 --> 00:02:25,046 What'd you think? 32 00:02:25,079 --> 00:02:27,882 I think, uh... 33 00:02:27,915 --> 00:02:29,550 ...a sexologist is 34 00:02:29,584 --> 00:02:30,785 not a real thing. 35 00:02:31,385 --> 00:02:32,520 Hey! 36 00:02:32,553 --> 00:02:35,455 It totally is too a real profession. 37 00:02:35,489 --> 00:02:37,190 Oh yeah? 38 00:02:38,860 --> 00:02:40,928 What'd she major in in school? 39 00:02:40,962 --> 00:02:42,096 Doggy style? 40 00:02:42,130 --> 00:02:45,133 Yeah, probably cunnilingus and other things. 41 00:02:46,299 --> 00:02:47,869 Okay. 42 00:02:49,971 --> 00:02:52,272 January 13th, 43 00:02:52,840 --> 00:02:54,408 three-ish. 44 00:02:54,441 --> 00:02:57,712 Jack has been consumed with sex to get pregnant, 45 00:02:57,745 --> 00:03:00,247 so I thought I would spice it up a little bit 46 00:03:00,280 --> 00:03:01,616 with some dirty talk 47 00:03:01,649 --> 00:03:06,319 courtesy of Dr. Greta from episode 24. 48 00:03:07,287 --> 00:03:09,222 I thought it was hot. 49 00:03:09,256 --> 00:03:11,324 Jack seemed a little confused. 50 00:03:11,358 --> 00:03:14,062 Not confused. The only confusing part was 51 00:03:14,095 --> 00:03:15,730 how my wife of 20 years 52 00:03:15,763 --> 00:03:17,364 turned into a cum slut. 53 00:03:17,397 --> 00:03:20,200 Jack is normally a little more... 54 00:03:20,233 --> 00:03:21,869 -reserved in bed. -Gill! 55 00:03:21,903 --> 00:03:24,438 Can you wrap it up? They're gonna be here any minute. 56 00:03:24,471 --> 00:03:27,374 It's my job. I'll be done in a second. 57 00:03:30,410 --> 00:03:33,047 Oh! Shit, that's hot. 58 00:03:33,081 --> 00:03:34,281 Don't burn your pussy. 59 00:03:34,314 --> 00:03:37,118 Oh, too late. 60 00:03:37,151 --> 00:03:39,187 Hey, what are you doing? 61 00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:41,254 Huh? What are you talking about? 62 00:03:41,288 --> 00:03:43,323 Where is the outfit? 63 00:03:43,356 --> 00:03:44,859 Oh, I'm not wearing that. 64 00:03:44,892 --> 00:03:46,259 No, Jack... 65 00:03:46,293 --> 00:03:47,995 You promised. 66 00:03:48,029 --> 00:03:49,262 I'll look ridiculous. 67 00:03:49,296 --> 00:03:50,898 No, you won't. 68 00:03:53,167 --> 00:03:54,267 You'll look hot. 69 00:03:57,337 --> 00:03:59,140 You think the chef heard us? 70 00:03:59,173 --> 00:04:02,710 No way! This house is huge! 71 00:04:02,744 --> 00:04:05,245 You're walking so fast. I can't move in these things. 72 00:04:05,278 --> 00:04:09,150 Now you know how I feel when I wear Spanx. 73 00:04:09,183 --> 00:04:10,551 Beauty is pain, baby. 74 00:04:10,585 --> 00:04:12,787 How do people wear these? 75 00:04:17,759 --> 00:04:19,894 Look like... 76 00:04:19,927 --> 00:04:22,496 Enrique Iglesias's accountant. 77 00:04:22,530 --> 00:04:25,365 Okay, let's just get a quick selfie... 78 00:04:25,398 --> 00:04:27,702 -Oh, yeah. -...in front of the sign. 79 00:04:27,735 --> 00:04:29,871 Oh, wait a minute, hold on. Let me just get this. 80 00:04:29,904 --> 00:04:32,372 -A little... There we go. -What are you doing? 81 00:04:32,405 --> 00:04:33,608 -No! -No, come on. 82 00:04:33,641 --> 00:04:35,375 They want us together wearing their shit, 83 00:04:35,408 --> 00:04:36,644 looking hot, so... 84 00:04:36,677 --> 00:04:38,311 Oh, you can't post this, sweetie. 85 00:04:38,345 --> 00:04:39,614 Yes, I have to post this, sweetie. 86 00:04:39,647 --> 00:04:40,715 No, no, no. 87 00:04:40,748 --> 00:04:42,116 Come on, just give me one. Give me one good one. 88 00:04:42,150 --> 00:04:44,484 -I know you got it in you. -My students are gonna see. 89 00:04:44,519 --> 00:04:47,555 -Looking great. Crushing it. -All right, you got it. 90 00:04:47,588 --> 00:04:50,658 Okay, which one do you like? 91 00:04:50,691 --> 00:04:52,193 Uh... what? 92 00:04:52,226 --> 00:04:53,460 This one. Great? 93 00:04:53,493 --> 00:04:54,494 -Great. -Yes? Loving it. 94 00:04:54,529 --> 00:04:55,663 -Do it. -Okay, fine. 95 00:04:55,696 --> 00:04:56,964 Thought you were taking the night off. 96 00:04:56,998 --> 00:04:58,465 I am gonna take the night off. 97 00:04:58,498 --> 00:05:00,367 I just, you know, the night hasn't started yet, 98 00:05:00,400 --> 00:05:02,804 and I need to post a photo really quickly. 99 00:05:02,837 --> 00:05:04,539 -Right. -Posting... 100 00:05:04,572 --> 00:05:07,208 I have to do this really quickly. 101 00:05:07,241 --> 00:05:08,976 Happy birthday. Posted. 102 00:05:09,544 --> 00:05:12,379 -There you are. -Hi. 103 00:05:12,412 --> 00:05:15,348 Just wanted to have a, you know, moment 104 00:05:15,382 --> 00:05:18,085 just with my beautiful wife. 105 00:05:19,954 --> 00:05:21,722 You know what I was thinking about today? 106 00:05:21,756 --> 00:05:24,424 -What? -When I first saw you, 107 00:05:24,457 --> 00:05:26,527 20 years ago, 108 00:05:26,561 --> 00:05:28,563 across the bar at the El Sombrero... 109 00:05:28,596 --> 00:05:29,496 Oh! 110 00:05:29,530 --> 00:05:32,967 ...and how I knew right away 111 00:05:33,501 --> 00:05:35,468 that in 20 years, 112 00:05:35,503 --> 00:05:37,238 I would still be looking at you. 113 00:05:37,271 --> 00:05:39,439 Oh my God! 114 00:05:39,472 --> 00:05:42,777 Twenty years! Can you believe it? 115 00:05:43,244 --> 00:05:44,612 Yeah, 116 00:05:44,645 --> 00:05:45,513 I can, 117 00:05:45,546 --> 00:05:46,747 'cause I love you. 118 00:05:48,015 --> 00:05:49,016 I love you. 119 00:05:51,586 --> 00:05:54,255 -Happy birthday. -Happy birthday. 120 00:05:55,623 --> 00:05:57,158 God... 121 00:05:57,191 --> 00:05:59,392 that was so sweet. 122 00:05:59,426 --> 00:06:01,696 I mean, I'm just a great guy. 123 00:06:01,729 --> 00:06:05,032 -Can you do that again? -What do you mean? 124 00:06:05,867 --> 00:06:07,802 -What? -For the birthday episode? 125 00:06:07,835 --> 00:06:09,637 -Gilly... -Come on, just a quick video. 126 00:06:09,670 --> 00:06:11,906 -The moment has passed. -That was beautiful, honey. 127 00:06:11,939 --> 00:06:13,641 -Please. I want to record it. -It was a real thing. 128 00:06:13,674 --> 00:06:15,543 I want everybody to see how wonderful that was. 129 00:06:15,576 --> 00:06:17,444 -I gotta brush my teeth. -What? 130 00:06:17,477 --> 00:06:20,014 Didn't you just brush your teeth? 131 00:07:11,464 --> 00:07:12,733 What the fuck? 132 00:07:12,767 --> 00:07:14,101 -Hello? -Oh, God. Oh, God. 133 00:07:14,135 --> 00:07:16,570 Is this a surprise party? You know I hate surprises. 134 00:07:16,604 --> 00:07:18,205 No, I would not do that to you. 135 00:07:18,239 --> 00:07:21,175 -I know. -They're supposed to be here. 136 00:07:21,208 --> 00:07:22,376 Hey, we should, uh, 137 00:07:22,410 --> 00:07:24,378 we should try not to overshare tonight, okay? 138 00:07:24,412 --> 00:07:25,913 Oh, by "we," you mean "me"? 139 00:07:25,947 --> 00:07:27,815 Yes, I mean you, you silly little... 140 00:07:27,848 --> 00:07:28,783 -Do I? -Mm-hmm. 141 00:07:29,717 --> 00:07:31,118 -You know what I hate? -No. 142 00:07:31,152 --> 00:07:32,153 Patio furniture. 143 00:07:32,186 --> 00:07:33,486 -This is perfect. -Why is there no furniture? 144 00:07:33,521 --> 00:07:34,956 Oh, guys! 145 00:07:36,257 --> 00:07:37,490 -Hi! -Happy birthday! 146 00:07:37,525 --> 00:07:38,458 Oh my God! 147 00:07:38,491 --> 00:07:39,727 It's so good to see you. 148 00:07:39,760 --> 00:07:41,494 Happy birthday. 149 00:07:41,529 --> 00:07:42,630 You guys look so great. 150 00:07:42,663 --> 00:07:43,965 -Thank you for coming. -You too. 151 00:07:43,998 --> 00:07:45,566 Come on in. 152 00:07:45,599 --> 00:07:47,501 -Wow! -Do you love it? 153 00:07:47,535 --> 00:07:49,537 Oh! Got brick? 154 00:07:49,570 --> 00:07:52,373 I know. We got so much brick. 155 00:07:52,406 --> 00:07:53,674 Where did you find this place? 156 00:07:53,708 --> 00:07:56,610 I found it through this incredible rental company, 157 00:07:56,644 --> 00:07:59,513 and the show gave me a stipend for the party. 158 00:07:59,547 --> 00:08:00,681 What?! Wow! 159 00:08:00,715 --> 00:08:02,550 The podcast must be doing really well. 160 00:08:02,583 --> 00:08:04,685 - Yeah. - Congratulations. 161 00:08:04,719 --> 00:08:06,687 Oh, God! 162 00:08:06,721 --> 00:08:09,590 -Oh! -Oh, boy! Come here! 163 00:08:09,623 --> 00:08:12,193 What?! Look at this... Let me... Oh. 164 00:08:12,226 --> 00:08:15,563 - Hey, guys. - Hugging royalty. Look at you. 165 00:08:15,596 --> 00:08:17,531 Wow. Happy birthday, Jack. 166 00:08:17,565 --> 00:08:18,666 Thank you. 167 00:08:18,699 --> 00:08:20,067 - What's up, guys? - Tell him. 168 00:08:20,101 --> 00:08:22,636 -He looks good, right? -Incredible color, confidence. 169 00:08:22,670 --> 00:08:24,405 Look at the leather pants. 170 00:08:24,438 --> 00:08:25,840 Oh... I can see your penis. 171 00:08:25,873 --> 00:08:27,708 -Oh. -There it is. Right there. 172 00:08:27,742 --> 00:08:28,943 Slightly to the right 173 00:08:28,976 --> 00:08:30,678 and, uh, presenting the appetizers. 174 00:08:30,711 --> 00:08:32,346 Oh, hello. 175 00:08:32,380 --> 00:08:34,648 How many cows died to create these pants? 176 00:08:34,682 --> 00:08:36,917 No, they're actually vegan leather. 177 00:08:36,951 --> 00:08:38,819 Oh, good, 'cause I'm lactose-intolerant. 178 00:08:38,853 --> 00:08:40,788 Here, just give it a feel. Like... 179 00:08:40,821 --> 00:08:43,124 -Come on. Step into my hand. -It's so real. 180 00:08:43,157 --> 00:08:45,026 -Who wants a drink? -Let's get a drink. 181 00:08:45,059 --> 00:08:46,293 Let's get a drink. 182 00:08:48,796 --> 00:08:51,532 -Look at this spread! -I know, it's great, right? 183 00:08:51,565 --> 00:08:53,434 -May I? Thank you. -Yes. 184 00:08:53,467 --> 00:08:54,902 I cannot believe we're 40! 185 00:08:54,935 --> 00:08:56,303 Oh, I know! 186 00:08:56,337 --> 00:08:57,705 I look so young though. 187 00:08:57,738 --> 00:08:59,840 -You do. -Isn't it freaky? 188 00:08:59,874 --> 00:09:01,876 Is there a, uh, is there a restroom I could use? 189 00:09:01,909 --> 00:09:03,577 Yes, just inside to the left. 190 00:09:03,611 --> 00:09:05,012 -Thank you. -Mm-hmm. 191 00:09:06,247 --> 00:09:08,015 You guys have been together longer than you've been apart. 192 00:09:08,049 --> 00:09:10,551 -No, I know, it's true. -Now we're starting a family. 193 00:09:10,584 --> 00:09:12,486 - You're pregnant? - Oh... 194 00:09:12,521 --> 00:09:14,488 No. No, no, no, no, no. Not yet. 195 00:09:14,523 --> 00:09:15,990 -Oh. -We're trying though. 196 00:09:16,023 --> 00:09:18,926 -Oh, that's amazing. -Mm-hmm. It is amazing. 197 00:09:18,959 --> 00:09:21,662 You guys have been together for a really long time. 198 00:09:21,695 --> 00:09:23,264 -Yeah. -What's your secret? 199 00:09:23,297 --> 00:09:24,732 Well, we're open. 200 00:09:24,765 --> 00:09:26,801 Uh, we weren't always open. It's kinda newish. 201 00:09:26,834 --> 00:09:29,336 Well... When Ish had cancer, 202 00:09:29,370 --> 00:09:31,906 he wasn't feeling that sexy, so he was like, you know, 203 00:09:31,939 --> 00:09:33,140 "Please, go get your needs met," 204 00:09:33,174 --> 00:09:34,909 and, you know, I did, and then... 205 00:09:34,942 --> 00:09:36,243 When he got healthier, I was like, 206 00:09:36,277 --> 00:09:38,279 "You should go partake as well, because you have 207 00:09:38,312 --> 00:09:40,314 a lot of kinks that I don't have the endurance for." 208 00:09:40,347 --> 00:09:42,750 Does that make sense? I was like, "Get out there." 209 00:09:42,783 --> 00:09:43,884 But we have a lot of rules. 210 00:09:43,918 --> 00:09:45,619 January to May, we are not open. 211 00:09:45,653 --> 00:09:46,887 That's cuffing season. 212 00:09:46,921 --> 00:09:48,756 We can't be in a state where our mothers live. 213 00:09:48,789 --> 00:09:50,858 The bathroom has a bidet! 214 00:09:50,891 --> 00:09:53,427 I mean, I didn't use it. I just... 215 00:09:53,461 --> 00:09:55,696 What'd I miss? 216 00:09:55,729 --> 00:09:58,332 They are starting a family. 217 00:10:12,379 --> 00:10:17,351 Well, well, well, if it isn't the one and only Mo. 218 00:10:17,384 --> 00:10:18,853 Wow! Logan! 219 00:10:18,886 --> 00:10:21,388 I had no idea you would be here. 220 00:10:22,323 --> 00:10:24,992 -Yes, you did. -Yeah, I did. 221 00:10:29,263 --> 00:10:30,764 -How you doin'? -Great. 222 00:10:30,798 --> 00:10:32,166 -Yeah? -Yeah. You? 223 00:10:32,967 --> 00:10:34,368 I'm great. 224 00:10:37,705 --> 00:10:38,739 Are you drunk? 225 00:10:38,772 --> 00:10:41,709 Yeah... pre-partied a little. 226 00:10:44,745 --> 00:10:45,980 -What? -Did you get your... 227 00:10:46,013 --> 00:10:47,214 Did you get your nose pierced? 228 00:10:47,248 --> 00:10:52,052 No! I mean, yes, but, like, many years ago. 229 00:10:52,086 --> 00:10:53,420 It's cute. 230 00:10:54,221 --> 00:10:55,456 Vodka? 231 00:10:55,489 --> 00:10:56,724 Your favorite. 232 00:10:56,757 --> 00:10:58,627 Yeah, when I was 20. Get that outta here. 233 00:10:59,860 --> 00:11:01,295 I can't believe you. 234 00:11:01,328 --> 00:11:03,797 You look, uh... 235 00:11:03,831 --> 00:11:05,866 You look healthy. 236 00:11:05,900 --> 00:11:08,169 -"Healthy"? -Yeah. 237 00:11:08,202 --> 00:11:09,970 Am I a dairy cow? 238 00:11:10,004 --> 00:11:13,073 -NPO Sunday, surgery Monday. -That is too long. It's risky. 239 00:11:13,107 --> 00:11:14,509 Plan is for left awake frontotemporal... 240 00:11:14,543 --> 00:11:17,211 Fine, just try not to waste any more of the breast milk. 241 00:11:17,244 --> 00:11:19,180 - Okay, thank you. - Sorry? 242 00:11:19,213 --> 00:11:21,882 - Bye-bye. - Lana? Hello? 243 00:11:21,916 --> 00:11:22,850 Hello? 244 00:11:22,883 --> 00:11:24,451 You're cutting out. 245 00:11:30,525 --> 00:11:31,660 You all right? 246 00:11:31,692 --> 00:11:33,360 Yeah. Fine. 247 00:11:34,995 --> 00:11:37,064 Try to have a bit of fun. 248 00:11:38,365 --> 00:11:39,200 I will. 249 00:11:39,233 --> 00:11:41,101 Um, let's try not to have too much fun 250 00:11:41,135 --> 00:11:43,337 because we do need to leave at five tomorrow morning 251 00:11:43,370 --> 00:11:45,005 to be back in time for Rocco. 252 00:11:45,039 --> 00:11:48,809 Sorry, what was that? I just got lost in those... 253 00:11:48,842 --> 00:11:50,744 gray-green eyes of yours. 254 00:11:50,778 --> 00:11:54,782 God, you are B-E-A-utiful, aren't you? 255 00:11:54,815 --> 00:11:56,951 -Sam... -Stunning. 256 00:11:56,984 --> 00:11:58,252 Stop it. 257 00:11:58,285 --> 00:11:59,853 Can't, but I think I-- 258 00:11:59,887 --> 00:12:01,789 -No, stop it. -Okay, okay, okay, okay. 259 00:12:01,822 --> 00:12:03,958 -They're waiting for us. -Don't be silly now. 260 00:12:07,261 --> 00:12:08,796 Oh, shit, is that Logan?! 261 00:12:08,829 --> 00:12:10,731 In the flesh, baby! 262 00:12:11,799 --> 00:12:13,602 I forgot about that! 263 00:12:13,635 --> 00:12:15,903 -Hey, Penelope. -Mo! 264 00:12:15,936 --> 00:12:17,972 -Hi, how are you? -Just really brilliant. 265 00:12:18,005 --> 00:12:19,406 -Thank you. Yeah. -Great. 266 00:12:19,440 --> 00:12:21,676 -How are you? -Great. Yeah. 267 00:12:21,710 --> 00:12:22,810 That's great. 268 00:12:22,843 --> 00:12:24,745 -Where's Ben? -Oh, he, uh, 269 00:12:24,778 --> 00:12:26,113 he couldn't make it. 270 00:12:26,146 --> 00:12:27,448 You know, he's working on Senator Bishop's campaign. 271 00:12:27,481 --> 00:12:30,985 So he's, uh, he's in New Orleans or Baton Rouge. 272 00:12:31,018 --> 00:12:32,820 Somewhere in Louisiana, that's all I know. 273 00:12:32,853 --> 00:12:34,288 -Do you ever see each other? -You know, 274 00:12:34,321 --> 00:12:37,559 healthy relationships do not actually require proximity. 275 00:12:37,592 --> 00:12:38,993 Good sex does. 276 00:12:39,026 --> 00:12:42,096 I'm gonna text Gill 'cause I don't know where they are. 277 00:12:42,129 --> 00:12:44,999 How are you anyway, Logan? How's the band? 278 00:12:45,032 --> 00:12:47,468 Good. Good, yeah. You know, we're between tours. 279 00:12:47,502 --> 00:12:51,305 Between tours. That's so cool that you're still touring! 280 00:12:51,338 --> 00:12:53,807 I think I heard your shit on the oldies station 281 00:12:53,841 --> 00:12:54,975 the other day. 282 00:12:55,009 --> 00:12:57,411 -Yacht Rock Radio. -That's horseshit. 283 00:12:58,647 --> 00:13:00,781 -Oh, hello. -Hi. 284 00:13:01,616 --> 00:13:02,651 Have we met? 285 00:13:02,684 --> 00:13:04,118 Oh, shit. Uh, Penelope. 286 00:13:04,151 --> 00:13:06,220 Yeah, I got this. I got this. Go ahead. 287 00:13:06,253 --> 00:13:07,221 Logan, Penelope. 288 00:13:07,254 --> 00:13:10,692 This is my beautiful wife, Penelope. 289 00:13:13,260 --> 00:13:16,163 -Pleasure. -Pleasure's all mine. 290 00:13:16,196 --> 00:13:17,965 We all went to college together. 291 00:13:17,998 --> 00:13:20,834 All of us, and then you, Jack, and I roomed together 292 00:13:20,868 --> 00:13:22,036 freshman, sophomore year. 293 00:13:22,069 --> 00:13:23,270 -Yeah, roomie. -Till he went off 294 00:13:23,304 --> 00:13:25,172 to become a famous rock star, as you do. 295 00:13:25,205 --> 00:13:26,940 - Look at me now. - You and Mo 296 00:13:26,974 --> 00:13:28,142 dated each other for a while. 297 00:13:28,175 --> 00:13:29,843 -Long time, actually. -Not necessary 298 00:13:29,877 --> 00:13:30,944 to the conversation at all. 299 00:13:30,978 --> 00:13:32,212 Until you left her for the band. 300 00:13:32,246 --> 00:13:33,581 We didn't need that tidbit to tell the story. 301 00:13:33,615 --> 00:13:36,917 - Can you guys get in... - Jack! Jackie-Jack-Jack! 302 00:13:36,950 --> 00:13:38,052 Honey, honey. 303 00:13:38,085 --> 00:13:39,853 Oh my God. 304 00:13:42,590 --> 00:13:43,591 Doctor. 305 00:13:43,625 --> 00:13:45,326 -Doctor. -Doctor. 306 00:13:45,359 --> 00:13:46,628 -Doctor. -Doctor. 307 00:13:46,661 --> 00:13:48,028 -Doctor! -Doctor! 308 00:13:51,031 --> 00:13:52,801 -Oh, buddy! -Good to see you, man. 309 00:13:52,833 --> 00:13:53,967 Good to see you. 310 00:13:54,001 --> 00:13:55,969 Oh, wow. 311 00:13:57,905 --> 00:13:59,139 Hey, Jackie. 312 00:13:59,173 --> 00:14:00,307 Loges. 313 00:14:03,177 --> 00:14:05,846 Ah, thanks for comin', man. 314 00:14:05,879 --> 00:14:07,948 -Missed you. -Missed you too. 315 00:14:07,981 --> 00:14:10,618 I missed both of you! Yeah! 316 00:14:11,985 --> 00:14:14,054 -Oh my God, you look so good! -Yeah? 317 00:14:14,088 --> 00:14:15,289 -Do you like? -You're trendy. 318 00:14:15,322 --> 00:14:16,791 -You're like a celebrity. -Hair. 319 00:14:16,825 --> 00:14:17,991 -No. -Yes, hair. 320 00:14:18,025 --> 00:14:19,927 Yeah, let me see the booty. The booty. 321 00:14:19,960 --> 00:14:21,161 -Okay. -It's good, right? 322 00:14:21,195 --> 00:14:23,464 Oh, yeah, it's like a little basketball. 323 00:14:23,497 --> 00:14:25,499 -So many squats. -It's great. 324 00:14:25,533 --> 00:14:27,201 I am so happy to see you! 325 00:14:27,234 --> 00:14:29,103 And bummed that Ben couldn't make it. 326 00:14:29,136 --> 00:14:31,038 I know, but, you know, it's to be expected. 327 00:14:40,347 --> 00:14:42,216 Everybody? 328 00:14:42,249 --> 00:14:44,918 Hello? Hi, I just... Hi, hello. 329 00:14:44,952 --> 00:14:46,788 - Excuse me. Hello? - Hello?! 330 00:14:46,821 --> 00:14:47,856 Oh! 331 00:14:47,888 --> 00:14:50,457 Sorry. 332 00:14:50,491 --> 00:14:53,862 I just wanted to say a really quick thank you so much 333 00:14:53,894 --> 00:14:55,229 to all of you for coming 334 00:14:55,262 --> 00:14:58,198 to celebrate Jack and I's 40th birthdays, 335 00:14:58,232 --> 00:15:00,968 and I know that some of you even left your babies 336 00:15:01,001 --> 00:15:02,970 for the very first time. 337 00:15:03,003 --> 00:15:05,840 - Thank you! - Oh, thank you. 338 00:15:05,874 --> 00:15:08,075 Um, so... 339 00:15:08,108 --> 00:15:10,645 cheers to having a great night! 340 00:15:15,784 --> 00:15:17,284 Jack? 341 00:15:18,318 --> 00:15:19,453 Do you wanna... 342 00:15:19,486 --> 00:15:21,054 say what you were gonna... 343 00:15:21,088 --> 00:15:22,590 say to everybody? 344 00:15:23,157 --> 00:15:25,025 -You okay? -Yeah. 345 00:15:25,058 --> 00:15:26,861 You're up, Jackie. 346 00:15:26,895 --> 00:15:28,730 It's funny with old friends. 347 00:15:28,763 --> 00:15:31,231 You can not see them for years and then, 348 00:15:31,265 --> 00:15:33,066 suddenly you're in the same room, 349 00:15:33,100 --> 00:15:35,670 and it's like no time's passed at all. 350 00:15:37,070 --> 00:15:38,706 I guess the opposite works too. 351 00:15:38,740 --> 00:15:40,909 You could be with someone forever, 352 00:15:40,941 --> 00:15:42,510 and suddenly, something happens, 353 00:15:42,544 --> 00:15:46,146 and it feels like you don't even know 'em. 354 00:15:46,180 --> 00:15:48,348 Like how you suddenly dress like Rod Stewart. 355 00:15:48,382 --> 00:15:51,351 I love Rod Stewart. 356 00:15:52,453 --> 00:15:53,454 So... 357 00:15:53,487 --> 00:15:56,457 Anyway, I thought it might be a nice thing 358 00:15:56,490 --> 00:16:00,394 to go back before the times of Facebook and Instagram, 359 00:16:00,427 --> 00:16:02,864 and have us all just be together. 360 00:16:02,897 --> 00:16:04,097 No distractions. 361 00:16:04,131 --> 00:16:05,999 Just like it used to be. 362 00:16:06,033 --> 00:16:07,902 So, Gill and I... 363 00:16:07,936 --> 00:16:09,938 -Mmm. -...thought that, uh, 364 00:16:09,970 --> 00:16:11,606 before we get the party started, 365 00:16:11,639 --> 00:16:14,274 it might be, uh, a nice idea 366 00:16:14,308 --> 00:16:18,312 for everyone to surrender their phones 367 00:16:18,345 --> 00:16:21,215 for the night into this unplug box. 368 00:16:21,248 --> 00:16:23,885 -Okay, you can't be serious. -I am. 369 00:16:23,918 --> 00:16:25,219 Fuck! No! 370 00:16:25,252 --> 00:16:27,020 I've heard of these parties before. 371 00:16:27,054 --> 00:16:28,355 Jackie, take it. 372 00:16:29,824 --> 00:16:30,892 -So close. -Oh! 373 00:16:32,025 --> 00:16:33,528 You're not taking my bloody phone. 374 00:16:33,561 --> 00:16:35,329 Yeah, I mean, I could get a work call. 375 00:16:35,362 --> 00:16:38,365 -This is my worst nightmare. -Gilly, you agreed to this? 376 00:16:38,398 --> 00:16:41,435 I did because, guess what, it's only for one night! 377 00:16:41,468 --> 00:16:44,171 And that's only a couple hours if you think about it. 378 00:16:44,204 --> 00:16:45,472 -So come on! -Watch this. 379 00:16:45,507 --> 00:16:47,709 I'll show you how it's done. Here's the phone. 380 00:16:47,742 --> 00:16:49,076 This one's mine. 381 00:16:49,109 --> 00:16:50,912 - Just gonna put it in the box. - Just like that. 382 00:16:50,945 --> 00:16:52,412 Gill, show 'em how it's done. 383 00:16:52,446 --> 00:16:54,014 Um... one second. 384 00:16:54,047 --> 00:16:55,182 Guys, wanna take a selfie? 385 00:16:55,215 --> 00:16:56,784 -Can I? Just before... -Yeah. Oh, yeah. 386 00:16:56,818 --> 00:16:58,920 Before we do it, just, can we get in? 387 00:17:00,522 --> 00:17:02,322 -Cheese! -Good job. 388 00:17:02,356 --> 00:17:05,192 Mo, is that your top-secret government phone? 389 00:17:05,225 --> 00:17:06,360 Uh, no, that is my personal. 390 00:17:06,393 --> 00:17:08,061 I would never surrender my work phone. 391 00:17:08,095 --> 00:17:09,229 Plus, I don't have it. 392 00:17:09,263 --> 00:17:11,331 Oh, so we have your full attention? 393 00:17:11,365 --> 00:17:13,200 Just one night. Goes right in the box. 394 00:17:13,233 --> 00:17:15,302 No one's gonna look at it. I promise. 395 00:17:15,335 --> 00:17:18,606 - Bye, BradBerry. - Wait, so, the... 396 00:17:18,640 --> 00:17:21,208 No one is having any access to their phone 397 00:17:21,241 --> 00:17:23,076 for the entire night? 398 00:17:23,110 --> 00:17:25,013 That's the idea, Penelope. 399 00:17:25,045 --> 00:17:26,648 It's fine, Penelope. 400 00:17:26,681 --> 00:17:28,148 Oh, okay. 401 00:17:28,181 --> 00:17:30,083 Great. What if Lana needs something? 402 00:17:30,117 --> 00:17:31,953 -She'll be fine. -And it's an emergency? 403 00:17:31,986 --> 00:17:33,253 You'll be fine. It's just... 404 00:17:33,287 --> 00:17:36,223 Look, you promised, babe. 405 00:17:36,256 --> 00:17:38,125 Just put your phone in the box. 406 00:17:41,395 --> 00:17:43,865 - Give it a try. - I need to let Lana know, 407 00:17:43,898 --> 00:17:45,132 first of all. 408 00:17:47,001 --> 00:17:48,235 Okay. 409 00:17:48,268 --> 00:17:50,705 Just waiting to see if she got the text. 410 00:17:54,876 --> 00:17:56,209 Okay. 411 00:17:57,144 --> 00:17:59,514 - She got it. - Great. 412 00:18:03,585 --> 00:18:06,054 Ah. Very good. 413 00:18:06,119 --> 00:18:07,354 And back over here. 414 00:18:07,387 --> 00:18:09,189 Oh, he's here, he's here. 415 00:18:09,222 --> 00:18:12,860 Uh, hold on, just gonna erase a few dick pics. 416 00:18:12,894 --> 00:18:14,194 Any time this year. 417 00:18:14,227 --> 00:18:16,229 -Dick, dick... -Now you are just showing off. 418 00:18:16,263 --> 00:18:18,198 - All right. Thank you. - All right. 419 00:18:18,231 --> 00:18:20,200 Okay, I might need to get this back later on 420 00:18:20,233 --> 00:18:22,503 -in case a client needs me... -Nope. Boo! 421 00:18:22,537 --> 00:18:23,470 No-work weekend. 422 00:18:23,504 --> 00:18:24,939 Okay, you guys, it's not that easy. 423 00:18:24,973 --> 00:18:26,340 I have a job. 424 00:18:26,373 --> 00:18:28,308 All right, so I think, 425 00:18:28,342 --> 00:18:32,412 uh, that leaves just one more. 426 00:18:32,446 --> 00:18:35,248 - Honey? - Yes, just one second. 427 00:18:35,282 --> 00:18:37,451 Everybody get in! Come on! 428 00:18:37,484 --> 00:18:39,353 -Selfie, come on. -Smile! 429 00:18:39,386 --> 00:18:41,956 -Honey, honey, honey, come on. -Come on, Penelope. 430 00:18:41,990 --> 00:18:44,191 One pic. Ah! Cheese! Yes! 431 00:18:44,224 --> 00:18:45,893 -You got it. -Looking hot. Okay, great. 432 00:18:45,927 --> 00:18:49,063 -Wait, wait. Hold on, wait. -Into the box you go. 433 00:18:49,097 --> 00:18:50,364 One more. One more. 434 00:18:50,397 --> 00:18:51,298 Last one. 435 00:18:51,331 --> 00:18:53,133 Oh... 436 00:18:53,166 --> 00:18:55,036 -Boo! Ugh! -Yeah. 437 00:18:55,069 --> 00:18:56,303 -Okay. -Perfect. 438 00:18:56,336 --> 00:18:58,305 -Got your content? -Yes, one second. 439 00:18:58,338 --> 00:18:59,707 -Let me just post. -Gill. 440 00:18:59,741 --> 00:19:01,609 I'm putting it up. This is the last one. 441 00:19:01,643 --> 00:19:03,310 Please put your phone in the box. 442 00:19:03,343 --> 00:19:05,713 And we are... live. 443 00:19:05,747 --> 00:19:06,848 Out. 444 00:19:07,481 --> 00:19:09,349 And... 445 00:19:09,383 --> 00:19:11,653 -Kiss it. -I love you, miss you so much. 446 00:19:11,686 --> 00:19:15,188 Okay. All right! So... 447 00:19:15,222 --> 00:19:18,191 I'm gonna put this one inside and, uh, 448 00:19:18,225 --> 00:19:20,061 let's get this party started. 449 00:19:20,094 --> 00:19:21,996 Right? 450 00:19:22,030 --> 00:19:23,998 -Be right back! -Okay! 451 00:19:24,032 --> 00:19:26,199 -I hope you guys are hungry! -Starving! 452 00:19:26,233 --> 00:19:28,603 Yay, no phones! 453 00:19:28,636 --> 00:19:30,938 - I know... - It'll be fine, Pen, Okay? 454 00:19:30,972 --> 00:19:31,939 It's gonna be... 455 00:19:44,251 --> 00:19:47,088 Everybody, as you may have noticed 456 00:19:47,121 --> 00:19:49,123 in our birthday invite, 457 00:19:49,157 --> 00:19:50,525 the mention of, uh, 458 00:19:50,558 --> 00:19:54,227 a special culinary adventure for this evening 459 00:19:54,261 --> 00:19:56,296 that I happened to plan all by myself. 460 00:19:56,329 --> 00:19:58,498 So, without further ado, 461 00:19:58,533 --> 00:20:01,836 I would like to introduce you to my new best friend, 462 00:20:01,869 --> 00:20:03,004 Chef Sasha, 463 00:20:03,037 --> 00:20:05,973 who will be running through the menu for this evening. 464 00:20:06,007 --> 00:20:09,209 Chef, please, 465 00:20:09,242 --> 00:20:10,745 take it away. 466 00:20:12,080 --> 00:20:13,213 Oh. 467 00:20:13,246 --> 00:20:15,783 Hello, beautiful people, 468 00:20:15,817 --> 00:20:18,720 and welcome to what I'm sure is going to be 469 00:20:18,753 --> 00:20:20,387 a memorable evening. 470 00:20:20,420 --> 00:20:23,191 As Jack mentioned, I am a chef 471 00:20:23,223 --> 00:20:24,592 who has won multiple awards 472 00:20:24,625 --> 00:20:26,661 in cannabis-infused fine dining. 473 00:20:26,694 --> 00:20:29,362 We're getting high! This party just got good! 474 00:20:29,396 --> 00:20:31,799 I am definitely going to get paranoid. 475 00:20:31,833 --> 00:20:34,135 Tonight isn't just about getting you super high. 476 00:20:34,168 --> 00:20:35,268 Anyone can do that. 477 00:20:35,302 --> 00:20:37,270 Tonight is about the food. 478 00:20:37,304 --> 00:20:39,040 I am a food-centric chef 479 00:20:39,073 --> 00:20:40,575 with accents of cannabis. 480 00:20:40,608 --> 00:20:42,476 It's all portion-controlled magic 481 00:20:42,510 --> 00:20:43,978 for a four-course journey, 482 00:20:44,011 --> 00:20:47,215 the end of which, hopefully, you will be super high. 483 00:20:47,247 --> 00:20:48,516 - Wow. - Yes. 484 00:20:48,549 --> 00:20:50,151 All right, well, let's kick it off 485 00:20:50,184 --> 00:20:51,719 with an amuse-bouche. 486 00:20:51,753 --> 00:20:52,754 Jack is holding... 487 00:20:52,787 --> 00:20:54,555 Please, what is this, a game show? 488 00:20:54,589 --> 00:20:56,323 ...tempura cannabis leaves 489 00:20:56,356 --> 00:20:59,160 with one milligram of THC per serving 490 00:20:59,193 --> 00:21:02,163 from the sativa-dominant strain, Squirt Juice. 491 00:21:02,196 --> 00:21:03,463 -Did that this morning. -Wow. 492 00:21:03,497 --> 00:21:05,265 This should leave you feeling relaxed, 493 00:21:05,298 --> 00:21:07,001 focused, and euphoric. 494 00:21:07,034 --> 00:21:10,104 And who couldn't use a little more euphoria, am I right? 495 00:21:10,138 --> 00:21:11,205 I know I could. 496 00:21:11,239 --> 00:21:12,573 Now, if you'll excuse me, 497 00:21:12,607 --> 00:21:14,675 I'm going to go set some intentions 498 00:21:14,709 --> 00:21:16,711 and cook the fuck out of some weed. 499 00:21:16,744 --> 00:21:19,514 Yes. All right. Thank you, Sasha. 500 00:21:19,547 --> 00:21:21,949 - It's Chef Sasha. - Oh, right. Sorry. 501 00:21:24,085 --> 00:21:26,053 -Mm. -Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. 502 00:21:28,156 --> 00:21:29,857 Oh, right, yes. 503 00:21:31,092 --> 00:21:32,960 Pass those out before they get cold. 504 00:21:34,095 --> 00:21:35,530 All right, let's dig in. 505 00:21:35,563 --> 00:21:37,430 Oh, I get tested for work. 506 00:21:37,464 --> 00:21:39,066 Oh, it leaves your system in 36 hours. 507 00:21:39,100 --> 00:21:42,670 -So I've been told. -Oh, thank you, Gill and Jack. 508 00:21:42,703 --> 00:21:44,906 I haven't eaten "a pot" since high school. 509 00:21:44,939 --> 00:21:46,339 -You lie! -That's true. 510 00:21:46,373 --> 00:21:48,242 That's the basis of our friendship. 511 00:21:48,276 --> 00:21:50,578 How much of this should I eat? 512 00:21:50,611 --> 00:21:52,513 How much... do you want? 513 00:21:52,547 --> 00:21:55,448 You're eating all of it. 514 00:21:55,482 --> 00:21:57,819 - Mmm. - Well, well, well. 515 00:21:57,852 --> 00:21:59,854 Surprise, surprise. 516 00:21:59,887 --> 00:22:01,589 Surprise, surprise. 517 00:22:01,622 --> 00:22:04,725 Oh, Jack, Jack, you son of a bitch. 518 00:22:04,759 --> 00:22:06,459 Thank you. 519 00:22:06,493 --> 00:22:07,895 Pen, you want one? 520 00:22:07,929 --> 00:22:09,362 -No, thanks. -Just take-- 521 00:22:09,396 --> 00:22:10,698 I don't want to have to pump and dump. 522 00:22:10,731 --> 00:22:12,567 Weren't you gonna do that anyway if you drank? 523 00:22:12,600 --> 00:22:14,401 -I'm not drinking. -Cheers. 524 00:22:14,434 --> 00:22:15,803 ...gonna drive us home... 525 00:22:15,837 --> 00:22:19,140 - Cheers, my darling. - Happy birthday. 526 00:22:19,173 --> 00:22:20,842 Happy birthday. 527 00:22:37,225 --> 00:22:38,993 No. Then apply. 528 00:22:41,662 --> 00:22:43,998 Oh! Oh! 529 00:22:50,538 --> 00:22:53,007 To the plus-ones. 530 00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:56,476 The plus-ones. 531 00:22:56,510 --> 00:22:58,679 And long may we continue to be, frankly, 532 00:22:58,713 --> 00:23:01,816 the best part of the fucking awful frat parties. 533 00:23:03,184 --> 00:23:04,451 I have missed you. 534 00:23:04,484 --> 00:23:08,122 I have missed you! 535 00:23:08,155 --> 00:23:11,424 I'm very glad you're doing better. 536 00:23:11,458 --> 00:23:13,861 Thank you. Me too. It's been a... 537 00:23:13,895 --> 00:23:16,063 It's been a long road. 538 00:23:17,131 --> 00:23:18,633 - So how's teaching? - Oh. 539 00:23:18,666 --> 00:23:20,635 I didn't tell you? I quit. 540 00:23:20,668 --> 00:23:23,504 -That's huge. -I've never been happier. 541 00:23:23,537 --> 00:23:24,972 No, really. 542 00:23:25,006 --> 00:23:27,909 It's like I'm finally living my life the way 543 00:23:27,942 --> 00:23:29,810 I was always supposed to. 544 00:23:29,844 --> 00:23:31,846 I hope you've slowed down a bit. 545 00:23:31,879 --> 00:23:34,849 You aren't doing those terrible 80-hour weeks still. 546 00:23:34,882 --> 00:23:37,718 Oh, no, I'm definitely doing those terrible 80-hour weeks, 547 00:23:37,752 --> 00:23:40,121 but you know me, I love it. 548 00:23:40,154 --> 00:23:42,323 What about you? Are you... are you back at work? 549 00:23:42,356 --> 00:23:44,358 I'm just doing a little bit of consulting 550 00:23:44,392 --> 00:23:45,693 for some old UK clients. 551 00:23:45,726 --> 00:23:48,796 It's funny. My job was such a massive part 552 00:23:48,829 --> 00:23:52,465 of who I am, and now I just... 553 00:23:52,499 --> 00:23:56,469 I don't know, I'm so tied to the little sausage, I... 554 00:23:56,504 --> 00:23:58,806 I can't bear leaving him. 555 00:23:58,839 --> 00:24:00,473 Other people's kids, they suck. 556 00:24:00,508 --> 00:24:01,776 They suck. Kids are the worst. 557 00:24:01,809 --> 00:24:03,744 -They're little shits. -Ugh, little shits. 558 00:24:03,778 --> 00:24:05,813 -Their grubby little hands... -Throw 'em in the garbage. 559 00:24:05,846 --> 00:24:07,715 ...and their grubby little minds. 560 00:24:07,748 --> 00:24:10,351 I never thought this podcast was gonna take off. 561 00:24:10,384 --> 00:24:11,986 I was just doing it for fun, 562 00:24:12,019 --> 00:24:15,356 but now, people are actually stopping me on the street 563 00:24:15,389 --> 00:24:17,558 and asking me for advice. Yes! 564 00:24:17,591 --> 00:24:19,894 It's like I'm actually connecting with people, 565 00:24:19,927 --> 00:24:22,964 and they're listening to what I'm saying. 566 00:24:23,998 --> 00:24:26,000 Oh, I'm sorry. What were you saying? 567 00:24:26,033 --> 00:24:27,168 Damian, stop! 568 00:24:27,201 --> 00:24:29,904 You at least look like you've got your shit together. 569 00:24:29,937 --> 00:24:32,573 - Don't we all? - Ow! Oh! Knee to the balls! 570 00:24:32,606 --> 00:24:35,576 - Got the knee to-- No! - Mmm, no. 571 00:24:35,609 --> 00:24:37,678 Yeah, no. 572 00:24:42,149 --> 00:24:45,319 That episode all about your balls, "Jack's Sack." 573 00:24:45,353 --> 00:24:47,021 That shit is hilarious! 574 00:24:47,054 --> 00:24:50,057 I shared it with the entire neurological department. 575 00:24:50,091 --> 00:24:52,193 - Wow, huh, big hospital? - Yeah, huge. 576 00:24:52,226 --> 00:24:54,996 Yeah, I'm glad they enjoyed it. 577 00:24:55,029 --> 00:24:58,065 She must be making so much money by now, right? 578 00:24:58,099 --> 00:25:00,735 You can quit that teaching job of yours. 579 00:25:00,768 --> 00:25:02,803 Well, don't really want to quit. 580 00:25:02,837 --> 00:25:05,006 -I love teaching. -I'm just saying. 581 00:25:05,039 --> 00:25:07,675 You could stay at home with a baby, 582 00:25:07,708 --> 00:25:09,643 get a gym, get super ripped 583 00:25:09,677 --> 00:25:11,412 and be like a... DILF. 584 00:25:12,880 --> 00:25:14,648 Oof. 585 00:25:14,682 --> 00:25:16,317 What's your poison these days? 586 00:25:16,350 --> 00:25:18,753 Um... tequila works. 587 00:25:18,786 --> 00:25:21,122 Really? 588 00:25:21,155 --> 00:25:23,424 I vaguely remember someone swearing it off 589 00:25:23,457 --> 00:25:24,959 after our gig in Lawrence. 590 00:25:24,992 --> 00:25:27,695 Yeah, well, that's because those country-ass margaritas 591 00:25:27,728 --> 00:25:31,132 gave me acid reflux, and then I couldn't sing. 592 00:25:31,165 --> 00:25:34,035 I don't have to worry about that anymore, so... 593 00:25:35,036 --> 00:25:37,571 I'm glad it all worked out for you, Mo. 594 00:25:37,605 --> 00:25:39,573 Yeah, I'm thriving. 595 00:25:39,607 --> 00:25:42,043 That little bundle of joy 596 00:25:42,076 --> 00:25:45,713 has hijacked my wife's libido, but tonight, 597 00:25:45,746 --> 00:25:48,282 I'm taking that back, Liam Neeson-style, 598 00:25:48,315 --> 00:25:50,017 because tonight... 599 00:25:50,051 --> 00:25:52,787 there's no baby around to fuck things up. 600 00:25:55,524 --> 00:25:57,058 I think you might be... 601 00:25:57,091 --> 00:25:58,692 good with the chalk. 602 00:25:58,726 --> 00:26:00,661 To old friends. 603 00:26:01,695 --> 00:26:03,230 Is that what we are? 604 00:26:03,664 --> 00:26:05,232 Yeah, I hope so. 605 00:26:06,901 --> 00:26:09,336 -To friendship. -Uh-huh. 606 00:26:16,777 --> 00:26:18,379 -Get in, honey. -Get in, babe. 607 00:26:18,412 --> 00:26:19,548 Get in. 608 00:26:19,580 --> 00:26:20,848 Smile! Smile! 609 00:26:20,881 --> 00:26:23,884 Just kidding! There's no phone! 610 00:26:23,918 --> 00:26:26,720 <i>Abajo, al centro, y adentro.</i> 611 00:26:26,754 --> 00:26:28,756 Ready? No, no, don't... 612 00:26:28,789 --> 00:26:30,891 Don't down it. Fuck. Cheers. 613 00:26:34,195 --> 00:26:37,031 -I love you so much. -Cheers. You're the best. 614 00:26:37,064 --> 00:26:39,633 Um, so, the... 615 00:26:41,669 --> 00:26:43,904 God, it's like I don't know the words are not coming. 616 00:26:43,938 --> 00:26:45,906 They're coming out my mouth, coming out my mouth... 617 00:26:45,940 --> 00:26:47,641 Okay, okay... 618 00:26:50,644 --> 00:26:53,380 Nobody puts Jack in the corner! 619 00:26:58,553 --> 00:27:00,121 Dinner is served. 620 00:27:09,964 --> 00:27:11,899 How's everyone feeling so far? 621 00:27:11,932 --> 00:27:13,767 I mean, great. 622 00:27:13,801 --> 00:27:15,803 You know, I'm not feeling anything, really. 623 00:27:15,836 --> 00:27:17,171 -Okay. -I'm fine. 624 00:27:17,204 --> 00:27:19,340 Good. We're working on a gradual high here 625 00:27:19,373 --> 00:27:21,942 to ensure that everyone has an enjoyable ride. 626 00:27:21,976 --> 00:27:24,945 I'd like to provide you with an enjoyable ride. 627 00:27:24,979 --> 00:27:26,814 -What? -Two dishes in front of you. 628 00:27:26,847 --> 00:27:29,850 First, our soffritto tartlet with tonnato. 629 00:27:29,884 --> 00:27:32,587 That's coming in at five milligrams of THC. 630 00:27:32,621 --> 00:27:34,155 And on the larger plate, you'll see 631 00:27:34,188 --> 00:27:35,990 our poached halibut with leek vinaigrette. 632 00:27:36,023 --> 00:27:39,927 That is coming in at 20 milligrams of THC. 633 00:27:39,960 --> 00:27:42,696 Both use the sativa-dominant strain 634 00:27:42,730 --> 00:27:44,231 called Thug Pussy 635 00:27:44,265 --> 00:27:46,967 to keep you feeling energized and aroused. 636 00:27:47,001 --> 00:27:50,971 Oh, and to my vegan brother, blessings. 637 00:27:51,005 --> 00:27:53,040 In front of you, you'll see the vegan risotto 638 00:27:53,073 --> 00:27:55,510 with forest mushrooms and black truffle oil, 639 00:27:55,544 --> 00:27:58,012 also 20 milligrams of THC 640 00:27:58,045 --> 00:28:00,080 and will get you feeling aroused. 641 00:28:00,114 --> 00:28:01,583 Thank you so much. 642 00:28:01,616 --> 00:28:02,816 This looks so awesome. 643 00:28:02,850 --> 00:28:04,485 Thanks, "Cef Shasha." 644 00:28:05,753 --> 00:28:07,388 "Cef Sasha." 645 00:28:07,421 --> 00:28:10,191 -I got it! One more, I got it. -You can do it. 646 00:28:10,224 --> 00:28:12,092 Thank you, Chef Sasha. 647 00:28:12,126 --> 00:28:13,260 I did it! 648 00:28:13,294 --> 00:28:16,063 It happens. You're not having a stroke. 649 00:28:16,096 --> 00:28:18,499 But definitely don't think about having a stroke. 650 00:28:18,533 --> 00:28:20,467 Oh, God. Do you taste pennies? 651 00:28:20,501 --> 00:28:21,670 Enjoy. 652 00:28:21,702 --> 00:28:23,003 Oh, thank you. 653 00:28:23,037 --> 00:28:23,971 Enjoy. 654 00:28:24,004 --> 00:28:26,608 -Enjoy. -Yes. Thank you. 655 00:28:26,641 --> 00:28:28,510 Okay, this looks delicious. 656 00:28:28,543 --> 00:28:29,843 It does. 657 00:28:29,877 --> 00:28:32,279 I wish I could take a picture and post it. 658 00:28:32,313 --> 00:28:35,716 Take one with your mind. 659 00:28:35,749 --> 00:28:37,751 Did she say 20 milligrams? 660 00:28:37,785 --> 00:28:39,954 -That sounds like a lot. -It is a lot. 661 00:28:39,987 --> 00:28:44,491 I... I think that's a totally normal amount, right? 662 00:28:44,526 --> 00:28:45,759 Can we eat, or...? 663 00:28:45,793 --> 00:28:48,195 Yes, yes! Of course! Bon appetit! 664 00:29:50,824 --> 00:29:52,594 Hello, hello. Sorry. Hi. 665 00:29:52,627 --> 00:29:53,927 - Hi. - Hi. 666 00:29:53,961 --> 00:29:57,031 I just wanted to say to our amazing couple, 667 00:29:57,064 --> 00:29:58,999 Jack and Gill, thank you 668 00:29:59,033 --> 00:30:02,369 for being such a beautiful example 669 00:30:02,403 --> 00:30:05,105 of love and living life to the fullest. 670 00:30:05,139 --> 00:30:06,840 -Well done, you two. -That's it? 671 00:30:06,874 --> 00:30:08,442 Thank you. That's so sweet, Mo. 672 00:30:08,475 --> 00:30:12,246 You guys have always been so solid, like, since college. 673 00:30:12,279 --> 00:30:14,982 Just feels like you figured it out early. 674 00:30:15,015 --> 00:30:17,251 I mean, Jack definitely figured it out early. 675 00:30:17,284 --> 00:30:18,787 Remember, he had that whole spreadsheet 676 00:30:18,819 --> 00:30:20,120 of why Gill should date him. 677 00:30:20,154 --> 00:30:21,955 -Like, scientifically. -I helped you with that! 678 00:30:21,989 --> 00:30:23,390 I thought that was sexy! 679 00:30:23,424 --> 00:30:25,326 - I knew what I wanted. - I loved it. 680 00:30:25,359 --> 00:30:27,729 Deeply unsexy. Um... 681 00:30:27,762 --> 00:30:29,764 You know, it obviously worked 682 00:30:29,798 --> 00:30:33,033 'cause now you're this beautiful, perfect couple 683 00:30:33,067 --> 00:30:36,470 who always, you know, puts the other person first. 684 00:30:36,504 --> 00:30:40,908 Yeah, your... love and support 685 00:30:40,941 --> 00:30:43,745 is truly inspiring. 686 00:30:43,778 --> 00:30:46,013 -Aw. -We love you and... 687 00:30:46,046 --> 00:30:48,882 you know, we want your continued success 688 00:30:48,916 --> 00:30:50,785 in all things, in teaching, 689 00:30:50,819 --> 00:30:53,087 in your incredibly timely podcast, 690 00:30:53,120 --> 00:30:55,222 your journey to parenthood. 691 00:30:55,255 --> 00:30:58,859 Um... Jack's pants and shirt combo. 692 00:30:58,892 --> 00:31:00,160 I mean... 693 00:31:00,194 --> 00:31:02,162 We just want... whatever it's trying to say, 694 00:31:02,196 --> 00:31:04,331 I hope it gets to speak its truth. 695 00:31:04,365 --> 00:31:05,899 Speaks to me. 696 00:31:05,933 --> 00:31:08,068 Um, anyway, we love it, we love all of it 697 00:31:08,102 --> 00:31:09,937 and all of you, so happy birthday, 698 00:31:09,970 --> 00:31:11,472 and I am done. Thank you. Cheers. 699 00:31:11,506 --> 00:31:14,007 Thank you! I love you! 700 00:31:17,812 --> 00:31:19,514 -Eyes! -Eyes! 701 00:31:21,348 --> 00:31:24,385 Oh, and I love you all so, so much! 702 00:31:24,418 --> 00:31:26,053 I'm sorry. 703 00:31:26,086 --> 00:31:28,188 And I just want to thank each and every one of you 704 00:31:28,222 --> 00:31:31,925 for being here celebrating our 40th birthdays. 705 00:31:31,959 --> 00:31:34,027 It means the world to me. I love you all. 706 00:31:34,061 --> 00:31:36,230 You're so welcome. 707 00:31:36,263 --> 00:31:39,266 How much... higher are we gonna get? 708 00:31:39,299 --> 00:31:41,736 Not high enough. 709 00:31:41,770 --> 00:31:43,237 My fingers are tingling. 710 00:31:46,206 --> 00:31:49,009 Sorry, Gill, where would I find the bathroom? 711 00:31:49,042 --> 00:31:51,679 -One more time? -The bathroom. 712 00:31:51,713 --> 00:31:53,615 The bathroom? Oh, oh. 713 00:31:53,648 --> 00:31:54,948 I know. 714 00:31:54,982 --> 00:31:56,417 -It's upstairs. -Um, it's upstairs. 715 00:31:56,450 --> 00:31:58,419 -There is one downstairs. -But there is one... 716 00:31:58,452 --> 00:32:00,588 -Does she need to shower? -You need to take a shower? 717 00:32:00,622 --> 00:32:03,123 You have to go upstairs if you have to shower... 718 00:32:03,157 --> 00:32:04,992 But if it's just the powder room... 719 00:32:05,025 --> 00:32:06,828 -She's pooping! -...it's to the left. 720 00:32:08,730 --> 00:32:10,230 I'll find it. 721 00:32:10,264 --> 00:32:12,366 Hey, want me to come with you? 722 00:32:13,000 --> 00:32:15,035 -To the loo? -Yeah. 723 00:32:15,068 --> 00:32:17,371 -Why? -Well, maybe I could help. 724 00:32:18,272 --> 00:32:19,874 -With what? -Whatever you want... 725 00:32:19,908 --> 00:32:21,509 No. No. 726 00:33:32,312 --> 00:33:33,046 Lana? 727 00:33:33,080 --> 00:33:34,782 Lana! Oh, hi! Hi! 728 00:33:34,816 --> 00:33:35,917 Can you hear me? 729 00:33:35,950 --> 00:33:38,485 Hi! How's Rocco? Is he okay? 730 00:33:39,086 --> 00:33:41,488 Oh! He didn't! 731 00:33:41,523 --> 00:33:44,391 He drank it all? That's fantastic! 732 00:33:44,424 --> 00:33:46,026 Oh, well done. 733 00:33:46,393 --> 00:33:47,729 Aw! 734 00:33:48,295 --> 00:33:49,697 Aw! 735 00:33:50,297 --> 00:33:51,666 Aw... 736 00:33:51,699 --> 00:33:53,968 Lana, will you remember to keep checking the monitor 737 00:33:54,002 --> 00:33:56,938 in case he gets unswaddled while he's sleeping? 738 00:33:56,971 --> 00:33:58,405 The swaddle? 739 00:33:58,438 --> 00:34:00,307 - S... - Swaddle. 740 00:34:00,340 --> 00:34:02,075 Yeah. The... just... 741 00:34:02,109 --> 00:34:03,678 it happened to me the other night. 742 00:34:07,047 --> 00:34:08,783 Oh my God! 743 00:34:08,816 --> 00:34:12,452 I know it's not cool to do at the birthday party, I'm sorry. 744 00:34:13,855 --> 00:34:15,289 Because I have to, okay? 745 00:34:15,322 --> 00:34:18,026 We'll be... we'll be back first thing, um, 746 00:34:18,058 --> 00:34:20,093 at seven... maybe six. 747 00:34:20,127 --> 00:34:22,095 Let's say six. We'll be back by six. 748 00:34:22,129 --> 00:34:24,197 Yeah. Okay, have a great night, Lana. 749 00:34:24,231 --> 00:34:26,000 Thank you. I will. 750 00:34:26,034 --> 00:34:27,602 Thank you. Thank you so much. 751 00:34:27,635 --> 00:34:29,504 Okay. Love you. 752 00:34:29,537 --> 00:34:32,205 I... Well, I do. Um, okay, thank you, Lana. 753 00:34:32,239 --> 00:34:33,908 Thank you. Bye. 754 00:34:33,942 --> 00:34:34,976 Bye. 755 00:34:35,009 --> 00:34:36,844 Yeah, bye. 756 00:34:38,980 --> 00:34:40,615 Ishaan, I... 757 00:34:42,349 --> 00:34:44,852 I am madly in love with you. 758 00:34:46,554 --> 00:34:50,725 I am so... I've been in love with you for ten years, and... 759 00:34:50,758 --> 00:34:52,760 I just want to continue loving you forever. 760 00:34:52,794 --> 00:34:55,763 Oh, I've had this stupid fucking ring in my pocket. 761 00:35:27,394 --> 00:35:29,463 I've been, like... ...like, trying to find 762 00:35:29,496 --> 00:35:33,034 the courage to just ask you to spend your life with me. 763 00:35:33,067 --> 00:35:34,434 Wha... 764 00:35:34,468 --> 00:35:36,436 And just make me the happiest human. 765 00:35:36,470 --> 00:35:39,040 There's a missile! 766 00:35:39,073 --> 00:35:42,110 There's a missile! It's coming to California, 767 00:35:42,142 --> 00:35:43,544 and we need to find shelter! 768 00:35:43,578 --> 00:35:45,980 Okay, Penelope's cut off. 769 00:35:46,014 --> 00:35:47,381 We all got the same text. 770 00:35:47,414 --> 00:35:50,118 "Ballistic missile threat. 771 00:35:50,150 --> 00:35:51,586 Seek immediate shelter." 772 00:35:51,619 --> 00:35:53,054 It's probably just a drill, Pen. 773 00:35:53,087 --> 00:35:55,890 "This is not a drill." That is the last line. 774 00:35:55,923 --> 00:35:59,192 Hold-hold on, hold on, wait. You got your phone? 775 00:35:59,226 --> 00:36:00,995 Yeah, I was checking on Rocco, 776 00:36:01,029 --> 00:36:02,096 and I got the text. 777 00:36:02,130 --> 00:36:03,263 -How did you find the box? -What? 778 00:36:03,296 --> 00:36:05,767 How did you find the box? I hid it. 779 00:36:05,800 --> 00:36:08,703 It wasn't hard. Why aren't you freaking the fuck out? 780 00:36:08,736 --> 00:36:11,072 We all got the same text! 781 00:36:11,105 --> 00:36:13,273 Fuck! Fuck! 782 00:36:14,108 --> 00:36:15,375 What is it... what is this? 783 00:36:15,409 --> 00:36:17,111 Oh my God, I'm freaking the fuck out. 784 00:36:17,145 --> 00:36:18,378 Holy shit. 785 00:36:18,412 --> 00:36:20,180 Yeah, did you? Oh my God, what do we do? 786 00:36:20,213 --> 00:36:21,448 Okay, let me call a friend. 787 00:36:21,481 --> 00:36:22,750 -Try your folks. -Okay. 788 00:36:22,784 --> 00:36:24,719 -Did you call Lana? -Not since I got this. 789 00:36:24,752 --> 00:36:26,821 -I'll text her. -Oh, fuck. Going to voicemail. 790 00:36:26,854 --> 00:36:29,489 How much... how much time do we have? Does anyone know? 791 00:36:29,524 --> 00:36:31,592 Shouldn't we be going somewhere with less windows? 792 00:36:31,626 --> 00:36:33,493 - Is anybody getting through? - No! 793 00:36:33,528 --> 00:36:36,296 I did not survive cancer to go down like this! 794 00:36:36,329 --> 00:36:37,632 It's just getting a busy signal? 795 00:36:37,665 --> 00:36:39,232 - Me too. - Lines must be jammed. 796 00:36:39,266 --> 00:36:40,568 Okay, I just got a text from Ben. 797 00:36:40,601 --> 00:36:42,335 This could be happening any minute, 798 00:36:42,369 --> 00:36:43,604 so we need to seek immediate shelter. 799 00:36:43,638 --> 00:36:45,272 What shelter should we be seeking? 800 00:36:45,305 --> 00:36:47,041 - There's a basement! - Great, let's go. 801 00:36:47,075 --> 00:36:49,209 Okay. 802 00:36:49,242 --> 00:36:51,145 Should I know where that is? 803 00:36:51,179 --> 00:36:53,181 - No, I know! - Lead the way! 804 00:36:53,213 --> 00:36:54,247 I can do that! 805 00:36:57,250 --> 00:36:59,787 We're going this way! Go this way! 806 00:37:04,224 --> 00:37:05,993 -Wait! -Hurry up, for fuck's sake! 807 00:37:06,027 --> 00:37:08,062 I can't go any faster! 808 00:37:08,096 --> 00:37:09,362 The chef. Ow! 809 00:37:11,532 --> 00:37:13,568 -Shit, are you okay, buddy? -It's my ankle. 810 00:37:13,601 --> 00:37:16,137 -My ankle. -Jack! Jack! What happened? 811 00:37:19,974 --> 00:37:21,441 Honey, you got it. 812 00:37:21,475 --> 00:37:23,177 These fucking pants! 813 00:37:23,211 --> 00:37:25,546 -Are you okay? -Go, go, go, go! 814 00:37:25,580 --> 00:37:27,882 Dead end! This way! This way! 815 00:37:34,055 --> 00:37:35,757 Come on! 816 00:37:35,790 --> 00:37:38,291 No! Go back! Go back! 817 00:37:43,197 --> 00:37:44,866 Oh my God! Oh my God! 818 00:37:44,899 --> 00:37:46,701 -Ow! My leg! -Pick him up! 819 00:37:46,734 --> 00:37:50,938 No, your leg! Go, go! 820 00:37:50,972 --> 00:37:53,141 Wait! Wait! 821 00:37:59,647 --> 00:38:01,381 -Wait, wait, wait! -Are we all here? 822 00:38:01,414 --> 00:38:02,884 - Yes. - Hey! 823 00:38:02,917 --> 00:38:04,252 Hey! 824 00:38:04,284 --> 00:38:05,520 -Go! -Shit! Sorry. 825 00:38:05,553 --> 00:38:07,722 -Come in, come in. -Guys, guys, look, 826 00:38:07,755 --> 00:38:09,924 I don't think we need to be in the glass-filled room. 827 00:38:09,957 --> 00:38:12,160 -Let's just go to the... -Okay. 828 00:38:12,193 --> 00:38:13,393 Guys, over here! 829 00:38:13,426 --> 00:38:15,295 I was just about to come get you, Pen. 830 00:38:15,328 --> 00:38:16,463 - Come on. - This way! 831 00:38:16,496 --> 00:38:18,398 Mo! Mo! Mo, Mo, Mo. 832 00:38:18,431 --> 00:38:19,901 Do you think you could get a hold of any 833 00:38:19,934 --> 00:38:21,936 of your government contacts to get more information? 834 00:38:21,969 --> 00:38:23,771 Who sent the bomb? How many bombs are there? 835 00:38:23,805 --> 00:38:25,640 Does the U.S. have all of our lines of defense? 836 00:38:25,673 --> 00:38:27,909 I'm trying to reach my friend who works in the Pentagon. 837 00:38:27,942 --> 00:38:29,610 -But... shit. -What? 838 00:38:29,644 --> 00:38:31,746 -There's no service down here. -Oh, God! No! 839 00:38:31,779 --> 00:38:33,714 No, I'm not getting anything. 840 00:38:33,748 --> 00:38:35,883 What the fucking fuck? There's no Wi-Fi! 841 00:38:35,917 --> 00:38:38,553 Well, circuits can get jammed with everyone trying at once. 842 00:38:38,586 --> 00:38:39,687 What the fuck is happening? 843 00:38:39,720 --> 00:38:41,522 This is the fucking apocalypse! 844 00:38:41,556 --> 00:38:43,624 -Should we go upstairs? -No, absolutely not. 845 00:38:43,658 --> 00:38:45,026 We are much safer in the basement. 846 00:38:45,059 --> 00:38:47,962 Depending on the size and location of the missile... 847 00:38:47,995 --> 00:38:49,897 -Who would bomb us? -Really? 848 00:38:49,931 --> 00:38:52,300 I know so many people who would bomb us. 849 00:38:52,332 --> 00:38:53,734 -Oh my God! -The point is, 850 00:38:53,768 --> 00:38:55,603 we don't know who's launched it. 851 00:38:55,636 --> 00:38:57,505 It could be China, Russia, fucking North Korea, 852 00:38:57,538 --> 00:38:58,940 and we don't know what they launched. 853 00:38:58,973 --> 00:39:00,508 Might be a hypersonic missile 854 00:39:00,541 --> 00:39:02,310 which can travel at 20 times the speed of sound 855 00:39:02,342 --> 00:39:03,811 or a supersonic missile 856 00:39:03,845 --> 00:39:06,013 which can usually evade all of our types 857 00:39:06,047 --> 00:39:08,415 of defense missile systems and different types of radar. 858 00:39:08,448 --> 00:39:09,617 The point is, there's a lot 859 00:39:09,650 --> 00:39:10,885 of different types of fucking missiles. 860 00:39:10,918 --> 00:39:12,820 So we may not even be able to detect a bomb? 861 00:39:12,854 --> 00:39:15,122 Missile! It's a missile. I said "missile" 40 times. 862 00:39:15,156 --> 00:39:17,925 Yes, and what we really need to worry about is after. 863 00:39:17,959 --> 00:39:19,927 There could be nuclear fallout which is why I think 864 00:39:19,961 --> 00:39:23,396 we need to stay indoors for at least 24 hours. 865 00:39:23,430 --> 00:39:25,666 Twenty-four hours?! 866 00:39:25,700 --> 00:39:28,435 At least! Can you all sit the fuck down, please? 867 00:39:28,468 --> 00:39:30,905 -I'm sorry. -It's just a lot. 868 00:39:30,938 --> 00:39:32,773 Probably 48 when the... 869 00:39:32,807 --> 00:39:35,442 -Forty? -...if the missile strikes. 870 00:39:35,475 --> 00:39:36,677 What is the probability of that? 871 00:39:36,711 --> 00:39:38,546 -I don't know. -God, we're gonna have 872 00:39:38,579 --> 00:39:40,748 -to wear those masks again! -If we even live! 873 00:39:40,781 --> 00:39:43,284 Why don't we all just try to stay positive? 874 00:39:43,317 --> 00:39:44,619 Right? You know, because thinking 875 00:39:44,652 --> 00:39:46,120 about the worst while we're down there, 876 00:39:46,153 --> 00:39:47,555 that's not gonna do anything, right? 877 00:39:47,588 --> 00:39:50,423 Uh, it's a fucking bomb, Gill! 878 00:39:50,457 --> 00:39:52,293 I fucking know, Sam. 879 00:39:52,326 --> 00:39:53,426 Just trying to stay positive 880 00:39:53,460 --> 00:39:54,629 about the motherfucking bomb, Sam! 881 00:39:54,662 --> 00:39:55,563 Missile. 882 00:39:55,596 --> 00:39:57,565 -Mo, Mo, Mo, listen. -Yeah? 883 00:39:57,598 --> 00:39:59,466 What's the likelihood that we'll be able to stop 884 00:39:59,499 --> 00:40:00,835 whatever missile is coming towards us? 885 00:40:00,868 --> 00:40:02,670 -Um... -That-that's what you analyze. 886 00:40:02,703 --> 00:40:04,906 Well, sort of. I analyze foreign weapons development. 887 00:40:04,939 --> 00:40:06,841 -But the, uh, likelihood... -Same thing. 888 00:40:06,874 --> 00:40:09,610 ...depends on a lot of variables and factors. 889 00:40:09,644 --> 00:40:11,444 Okay. Okay. Rough estimate, 890 00:40:11,478 --> 00:40:13,314 factoring in the factors and the variables, 891 00:40:13,347 --> 00:40:14,548 in your professional opinion, 892 00:40:14,582 --> 00:40:15,850 is this the beginning of World War III, 893 00:40:15,883 --> 00:40:17,685 or are we gonna be able to stop 894 00:40:17,718 --> 00:40:19,120 the invisible missile that's headed for us, 895 00:40:19,153 --> 00:40:21,589 and it all is gonna be kind of a misunderstanding? 896 00:40:21,622 --> 00:40:22,990 So it's a little tough to gauge. 897 00:40:23,024 --> 00:40:24,759 Okay, okay, so you're saying it's pretty bad. 898 00:40:24,792 --> 00:40:26,360 Just leave her alone, Jack! 899 00:40:26,394 --> 00:40:28,029 Jack, our U.S. defense systems 900 00:40:28,062 --> 00:40:30,430 have the potential to protect its citizens 901 00:40:30,463 --> 00:40:31,933 against a nuclear attack. 902 00:40:31,966 --> 00:40:33,334 "Has the potential." 903 00:40:33,367 --> 00:40:34,735 - Do they, though? - Yes. 904 00:40:34,769 --> 00:40:36,771 Theoretically. In theory. Everything's a theory. 905 00:40:36,804 --> 00:40:38,739 What about hypersonics? 906 00:40:38,773 --> 00:40:40,608 We don't spend enough on defense. 907 00:40:40,641 --> 00:40:41,809 We don't invest in military advancements. 908 00:40:41,842 --> 00:40:43,177 What the fuck are you talking about? 909 00:40:43,210 --> 00:40:44,578 All we do is spend money on defense. 910 00:40:44,612 --> 00:40:46,013 We need to spend more money on education. 911 00:40:46,047 --> 00:40:48,749 That has nothing to do with right now, Jack! 912 00:40:48,783 --> 00:40:50,885 Everything is connected, Ishaan! 913 00:40:50,918 --> 00:40:52,853 I can't breathe. 914 00:40:52,887 --> 00:40:55,957 I can't breathe. Honey, I can't breathe. 915 00:40:55,990 --> 00:40:57,258 Baby? What's happening? 916 00:40:57,291 --> 00:40:59,360 I don't know. Oh my God, I don't know. 917 00:40:59,393 --> 00:41:01,329 Oh my God, I'm really dizzy. 918 00:41:01,362 --> 00:41:02,730 Oh my God, I can't breathe, 919 00:41:02,763 --> 00:41:04,732 -and my chest is hurting. -Hey! 920 00:41:04,765 --> 00:41:07,268 Gill's having a heart attack! 921 00:41:07,301 --> 00:41:08,970 -I am?! -She is?! 922 00:41:09,003 --> 00:41:10,671 Hey, what's wrong, what's wrong? 923 00:41:10,705 --> 00:41:12,506 Does it feel like you're underwater? 924 00:41:12,540 --> 00:41:14,108 -Hell yeah. -Is there any pain 925 00:41:14,141 --> 00:41:16,877 radiating from your left jaw, left shoulder, left arm? 926 00:41:16,911 --> 00:41:18,546 -Left? -Yes, left, left, left! 927 00:41:18,579 --> 00:41:20,480 Not my left. No, no, that feels fine. 928 00:41:20,514 --> 00:41:21,682 Okay, nothing on your left side? 929 00:41:21,716 --> 00:41:23,150 Nothing on my left side. 930 00:41:23,184 --> 00:41:25,987 Okay, okay, Gill, take deep breaths with me, okay? 931 00:41:26,020 --> 00:41:27,288 -Okay. -Deep breath in. 932 00:41:28,723 --> 00:41:30,391 Deep breath out. 933 00:41:30,424 --> 00:41:32,593 Deep breath in. 934 00:41:32,626 --> 00:41:34,729 Deep breath out. 935 00:41:34,762 --> 00:41:36,564 Okay, feeling better? 936 00:41:36,597 --> 00:41:37,798 Yeah, a little, I guess. 937 00:41:39,367 --> 00:41:41,235 It's okay. She's having a panic attack. 938 00:41:41,268 --> 00:41:43,371 Oh. Oh, I have those all the time. 939 00:41:43,404 --> 00:41:45,172 -She's fine. -I'm fine? 940 00:41:45,206 --> 00:41:47,174 - Yes, yes, yes. - I don't feel fine. 941 00:41:47,208 --> 00:41:49,777 You're gonna be okay. Just need... Look, Jack, 942 00:41:49,810 --> 00:41:52,580 do me a favor, put your hand on her chest. 943 00:41:52,613 --> 00:41:54,015 -This hand? -Yes, that hand. 944 00:41:54,048 --> 00:41:55,816 -Put that hand on my chest. -Yes. 945 00:41:55,850 --> 00:41:57,818 -You can help calm her down. -Yeah. 946 00:41:57,852 --> 00:41:59,787 Give your body some time to adjust. 947 00:41:59,820 --> 00:42:01,689 -You'll be fine. -Thank you. 948 00:42:01,722 --> 00:42:04,225 -You're welcome. Stay put. -Just breathe. 949 00:42:05,292 --> 00:42:06,861 -Where would I go? -Don't leave. 950 00:42:06,894 --> 00:42:10,131 I think that we need to just stay positive 951 00:42:10,164 --> 00:42:11,732 down here in the bomb shelter. 952 00:42:11,766 --> 00:42:13,467 I need some fucking Wi-Fi 953 00:42:13,501 --> 00:42:14,835 so I can make sure my baby's okay. 954 00:42:14,869 --> 00:42:16,237 Pen, there's no Wi-Fi down here. 955 00:42:16,270 --> 00:42:18,806 Pen, stay put. I texted Lana before we came down. 956 00:42:18,839 --> 00:42:22,009 -Just stay in the basement. -Yes, I know, Sam. 957 00:42:22,043 --> 00:42:24,879 I just really think we need to be with Rocco right now. 958 00:42:24,912 --> 00:42:27,648 He's three hours away, and... 959 00:42:28,349 --> 00:42:30,251 there's a bomb. 960 00:42:46,667 --> 00:42:49,170 I never should've left 20 years ago. 961 00:42:51,238 --> 00:42:52,606 What? 962 00:42:52,640 --> 00:42:54,642 I should've stayed with you. 963 00:42:55,576 --> 00:42:57,344 Built a life with you. 964 00:42:58,579 --> 00:43:00,581 Logan... 965 00:43:00,614 --> 00:43:04,585 Just... It just sucks that I'm now realizing this. 966 00:43:06,020 --> 00:43:09,023 I shouldn't have pissed about so much. 967 00:43:10,591 --> 00:43:12,993 I wasted so much time. 968 00:43:13,761 --> 00:43:16,597 I was so focused on my career, 969 00:43:16,630 --> 00:43:18,933 I let all this time just slip by. 970 00:43:18,966 --> 00:43:22,069 If I got my shit together sooner... 971 00:43:24,605 --> 00:43:26,974 I would've met Pen sooner. 972 00:43:29,143 --> 00:43:31,045 Could've had at least... 973 00:43:32,313 --> 00:43:33,614 three more kids. 974 00:43:33,647 --> 00:43:35,850 Jesus Christ, shut up! 975 00:43:35,883 --> 00:43:39,854 I always wanted a big family. I always... 976 00:43:39,887 --> 00:43:43,324 envisioned myself surrounded by... 977 00:43:43,357 --> 00:43:44,625 a gaggle of kids. 978 00:43:44,658 --> 00:43:45,826 I would've taken just one 979 00:43:45,860 --> 00:43:48,028 if Gill would've been on board. 980 00:43:48,929 --> 00:43:50,698 What? 981 00:43:50,731 --> 00:43:52,766 What are you talking about? 982 00:43:54,101 --> 00:43:56,770 I found your birth control pills. 983 00:43:59,340 --> 00:44:02,676 Can we please not do this in front of all our friends? 984 00:44:02,710 --> 00:44:04,945 Oh, yeah, we should wait 985 00:44:04,979 --> 00:44:07,948 till after we're incinerated by a nuclear explosion. 986 00:44:07,982 --> 00:44:10,184 -Jack, please... -Been trying to figure out, 987 00:44:10,217 --> 00:44:11,952 why would you... why would you do that? 988 00:44:11,986 --> 00:44:13,787 I don't know. I was gonna tell you. 989 00:44:13,821 --> 00:44:15,990 Oh, yeah? You were gonna tell me? 990 00:44:16,023 --> 00:44:18,859 Now you don't want to have a kid? Is that what's happening? 991 00:44:18,893 --> 00:44:20,761 I don't know. 992 00:44:20,794 --> 00:44:21,929 What the fuck? 993 00:44:21,962 --> 00:44:24,398 Why wouldn't you tell me? Huh? 994 00:44:24,431 --> 00:44:29,203 -Why wouldn't you tell me?! -I don't know. I... 995 00:44:29,236 --> 00:44:31,705 Well, at least I didn't have to find out on the podcast. 996 00:44:31,739 --> 00:44:33,841 Okay, that's not fair, Jack. 997 00:44:33,874 --> 00:44:35,843 Oh, it's not fair? No? Hm. 998 00:44:35,876 --> 00:44:37,512 So you air out all of our shit in front of all 999 00:44:37,546 --> 00:44:41,048 of your millions of followers who are basically strangers, 1000 00:44:41,081 --> 00:44:43,984 yet you don't tell me, the person that you live with. 1001 00:44:44,018 --> 00:44:46,387 You lie to me! That's not fair! 1002 00:44:46,420 --> 00:44:49,123 Do you want to know what else isn't fair, Jack? 1003 00:44:49,156 --> 00:44:53,227 When your husband puts expectations on you 1004 00:44:53,260 --> 00:44:55,296 and doesn't listen to you 1005 00:44:55,329 --> 00:44:59,867 and makes a huge decision for the both of us 1006 00:44:59,900 --> 00:45:02,870 and doesn't see what I really wanted. 1007 00:45:02,903 --> 00:45:04,772 That is what's not fair, Jack. 1008 00:45:04,805 --> 00:45:06,608 Not see what you wanted? 1009 00:45:06,641 --> 00:45:09,410 I-I-I'm sorry that I did not trust the words 1010 00:45:09,443 --> 00:45:11,011 that were coming out of your mouth! 1011 00:45:11,045 --> 00:45:12,846 I didn't realize that when you said 1012 00:45:12,880 --> 00:45:14,148 you wanted to have a baby with me, 1013 00:45:14,181 --> 00:45:16,150 what you really meant was you wanted to talk 1014 00:45:16,183 --> 00:45:19,853 about having a baby on your stupid fucking podcast! 1015 00:45:19,887 --> 00:45:23,757 That is so fucked up, you asshole! 1016 00:45:23,791 --> 00:45:26,727 That stupid fucking podcast 1017 00:45:26,760 --> 00:45:28,963 is what's paid for tonight 1018 00:45:28,996 --> 00:45:31,031 and pays your cell phone bills. 1019 00:45:31,065 --> 00:45:32,967 First of all, it is a family plan! 1020 00:45:33,000 --> 00:45:34,468 Okay? It just makes sense. Second of all, 1021 00:45:34,501 --> 00:45:37,271 tonight, you wanna just take-- just take it all back. 1022 00:45:37,304 --> 00:45:39,173 You can start with these fucking leather pants. 1023 00:45:39,206 --> 00:45:40,709 Here, I don't want these fucking-- 1024 00:45:40,741 --> 00:45:42,243 -Ah! Ah! Ow! -You know what, Jack? 1025 00:45:42,276 --> 00:45:44,912 Maybe if you actually listened to my podcast, 1026 00:45:44,945 --> 00:45:47,014 you would see why it's so successful. 1027 00:45:47,047 --> 00:45:50,317 I mean, why do you even want a kid? 1028 00:45:50,351 --> 00:45:52,920 Are you gonna pick him up from soccer practice 1029 00:45:52,953 --> 00:45:54,221 high out of your fucking mind? 1030 00:45:54,255 --> 00:45:56,524 Mo and I hooked up at the Deltopia party 1031 00:45:56,558 --> 00:45:57,592 in 2001! 1032 00:45:57,626 --> 00:45:58,826 - What?! - What? 1033 00:45:58,859 --> 00:46:00,394 -Sam? -What? 1034 00:46:00,427 --> 00:46:02,429 What do you mean, "hooked up"? 1035 00:46:04,131 --> 00:46:05,332 We got together. 1036 00:46:05,366 --> 00:46:07,501 Okay, so, in my defense, 1037 00:46:07,535 --> 00:46:09,069 I was very drunk. 1038 00:46:09,103 --> 00:46:11,939 -He could've been anybody. -That's fucked. 1039 00:46:11,972 --> 00:46:15,209 So you had sex with Mo and you didn't tell me? 1040 00:46:15,610 --> 00:46:16,910 Oh my God. 1041 00:46:16,944 --> 00:46:20,080 You dodgy fucker. 1042 00:46:20,114 --> 00:46:22,983 Well, I wasn't gonna mention this because... 1043 00:46:23,017 --> 00:46:26,153 well, I didn't think you could handle it, but fuck it. 1044 00:46:27,021 --> 00:46:28,690 I had sex with him. 1045 00:46:30,224 --> 00:46:32,694 - What? - Oh my God! 1046 00:46:32,727 --> 00:46:34,663 Oh, me? 1047 00:46:34,696 --> 00:46:36,830 Hi. 1048 00:46:36,864 --> 00:46:40,167 Yeah. It was in, um, in London. 1049 00:46:40,200 --> 00:46:44,471 Um, the... you were playing with the Jinx at The Half Moon 1050 00:46:44,506 --> 00:46:46,340 in like 2010. 1051 00:46:48,008 --> 00:46:49,943 2010, huh? 1052 00:46:51,145 --> 00:46:54,181 Oh, yeah! 1053 00:46:54,214 --> 00:46:57,084 -Yeah! -Yeah, hey, how you doin'? 1054 00:46:57,117 --> 00:46:59,119 I didn't recognize you with the... 1055 00:46:59,153 --> 00:47:01,121 I know. Yeah, I was, um... 1056 00:47:01,155 --> 00:47:03,290 Well, I'm thinner now, yeah. 1057 00:47:03,324 --> 00:47:06,293 What a small world. How you been? 1058 00:47:06,327 --> 00:47:08,162 I've been good! Yeah, I've been really good. 1059 00:47:08,195 --> 00:47:10,964 I didn't recognize you. I was going, "I know him." 1060 00:47:10,998 --> 00:47:13,568 Um, but you changed your hair. 1061 00:47:13,601 --> 00:47:16,270 Yeah. I had a, um, a blonde mohawk. 1062 00:47:16,303 --> 00:47:18,272 Yes, you did. I remember very well, 1063 00:47:18,305 --> 00:47:20,841 and it would not budge, even after... 1064 00:47:20,874 --> 00:47:23,010 Yeah, it was crazy. 1065 00:47:23,043 --> 00:47:25,112 It was really, really... 1066 00:47:25,145 --> 00:47:30,050 -It was really crazy. -How could you fuck... <i>him?!</i> 1067 00:47:30,084 --> 00:47:31,686 I knew you couldn't handle it. 1068 00:47:31,720 --> 00:47:33,187 That's disgusting! 1069 00:47:33,220 --> 00:47:35,189 -Hey! -Why didn't you tell me? 1070 00:47:35,222 --> 00:47:36,957 Well, I didn't tell you, Sam, 1071 00:47:36,990 --> 00:47:38,760 because I didn't know you knew him. 1072 00:47:38,793 --> 00:47:40,795 I have been on holiday with Mo. 1073 00:47:40,829 --> 00:47:42,262 You should've told me. 1074 00:47:42,296 --> 00:47:43,497 Shut up! 1075 00:47:43,531 --> 00:47:46,233 Who cares?! 1076 00:47:46,266 --> 00:47:47,434 Straight people! 1077 00:47:47,468 --> 00:47:50,505 Oh my God, you're so fucking dysfunctional! 1078 00:47:50,538 --> 00:47:52,640 It's like bad reality TV. 1079 00:47:52,674 --> 00:47:54,208 We make good reality TV! 1080 00:47:54,241 --> 00:47:56,778 We make <i>Drag Race</i> and bake-offs, 1081 00:47:56,811 --> 00:47:58,646 and you make <i>MILF Manor!</i> 1082 00:47:58,680 --> 00:48:01,048 I'm sorry. 1083 00:48:01,081 --> 00:48:02,483 - Okay... - I'm sorry. 1084 00:48:02,517 --> 00:48:05,052 We should just keep this light and-and breezy. 1085 00:48:05,085 --> 00:48:06,954 Yeah, that's a good call. That's a good call. 1086 00:48:06,987 --> 00:48:08,489 Okay. 1087 00:48:08,523 --> 00:48:11,392 Let's go around the room and just say, then... 1088 00:48:12,459 --> 00:48:13,595 what we're grateful for. 1089 00:48:13,628 --> 00:48:16,631 - That's a good idea. - Okay? Let's do that. 1090 00:48:16,664 --> 00:48:18,065 -Why don't you start, Ish? -What? 1091 00:48:18,098 --> 00:48:19,366 Why don't you start? 1092 00:48:21,603 --> 00:48:23,370 Um... 1093 00:48:24,672 --> 00:48:26,907 I'm grateful for... 1094 00:48:32,814 --> 00:48:34,081 Wow, what was I saying? 1095 00:48:34,114 --> 00:48:36,016 -What you're grateful for. -Oh my God. 1096 00:48:36,049 --> 00:48:39,086 Oh my God, I'm so high. I, um... 1097 00:48:39,119 --> 00:48:43,157 I, um, I'm grateful for... 1098 00:48:43,190 --> 00:48:45,760 ...my family. 1099 00:48:47,361 --> 00:48:50,565 For the strength that I didn't know I had... 1100 00:48:52,099 --> 00:48:54,569 and I found with the help of... 1101 00:48:54,602 --> 00:48:57,539 the love of my life, Damian. 1102 00:48:59,841 --> 00:49:01,975 You're my everything. 1103 00:49:02,009 --> 00:49:04,378 You make me a better person. 1104 00:49:04,411 --> 00:49:06,380 You make me laugh every single day. 1105 00:49:06,413 --> 00:49:08,616 That's very sweet. 1106 00:49:08,650 --> 00:49:10,384 It's true. 1107 00:49:11,553 --> 00:49:14,121 I'm grateful for, mmm... 1108 00:49:14,154 --> 00:49:17,291 my brother and my mother and... 1109 00:49:17,324 --> 00:49:19,993 ...and my chosen family, and my... 1110 00:49:20,027 --> 00:49:22,396 our Brussels Griffon, Sebastian. 1111 00:49:22,429 --> 00:49:25,999 - I miss him... - Oh my God. 1112 00:49:26,033 --> 00:49:28,335 ...so fucking much. 1113 00:49:28,368 --> 00:49:31,873 I miss our fucking dog. I want my dog. 1114 00:49:33,440 --> 00:49:36,578 And to find you, and you, you're my soulmate. 1115 00:49:36,611 --> 00:49:39,848 I love you so much. You're my best friend. 1116 00:49:43,818 --> 00:49:45,085 I almost got to marry you. 1117 00:49:45,118 --> 00:49:48,255 Aw! Almost. 1118 00:49:48,288 --> 00:49:50,090 Maybe if we don't get blown up. 1119 00:49:53,393 --> 00:49:55,395 Wow. 1120 00:49:56,631 --> 00:49:58,098 Okay. 1121 00:49:58,933 --> 00:50:00,033 You're up, Jack. 1122 00:50:00,067 --> 00:50:02,436 What am I thankful for? 1123 00:50:04,404 --> 00:50:09,176 I'm thankful for how things used to be. 1124 00:50:09,209 --> 00:50:10,745 I got to spend half of my life with the person 1125 00:50:10,778 --> 00:50:14,047 who I thought I knew more than anyone else in the world. 1126 00:50:16,483 --> 00:50:18,151 I miss that. 1127 00:50:20,053 --> 00:50:23,056 I'm thankful for that life too, Jack. 1128 00:50:26,159 --> 00:50:28,228 And I feel really lucky that I got to live 1129 00:50:28,262 --> 00:50:30,598 such a wonderful life with you. 1130 00:50:32,232 --> 00:50:34,401 That was really touching. 1131 00:50:36,069 --> 00:50:37,371 Okay, who's next? 1132 00:50:37,404 --> 00:50:40,040 I'm grateful for my son. 1133 00:50:42,710 --> 00:50:46,548 I'll never forgive myself for abandoning him. 1134 00:50:46,581 --> 00:50:48,950 I look at our son, and I can't believe 1135 00:50:48,983 --> 00:50:50,618 we created that life together. 1136 00:50:51,986 --> 00:50:53,688 We did that. 1137 00:50:55,222 --> 00:50:57,457 He's perfect. He's... 1138 00:50:58,258 --> 00:50:59,928 That's an unbiased fact. 1139 00:50:59,961 --> 00:51:03,163 His little hands, his little toes, he's... 1140 00:51:05,165 --> 00:51:06,801 ...all perfect. 1141 00:51:08,002 --> 00:51:09,737 You're an incredible mother. 1142 00:51:11,873 --> 00:51:13,641 Thank you. 1143 00:51:13,675 --> 00:51:16,010 Okay, I can go. Um... 1144 00:51:16,044 --> 00:51:18,345 I'm grateful for my family, 1145 00:51:18,378 --> 00:51:22,482 my friends, and the work that I do. 1146 00:51:25,053 --> 00:51:27,154 It's truly meant so much to me 1147 00:51:27,187 --> 00:51:30,625 to know that I'm making a difference. 1148 00:51:31,391 --> 00:51:33,393 And I'm really grateful 1149 00:51:33,427 --> 00:51:36,998 for all of the moments I've had with every one of you. 1150 00:51:37,031 --> 00:51:39,199 Truly grateful. 1151 00:51:39,232 --> 00:51:42,070 I'm grateful that my band kicked me out. 1152 00:51:42,102 --> 00:51:43,571 - Wait, what? - Yeah. 1153 00:51:43,605 --> 00:51:46,541 Happened a few weeks ago, but, um... 1154 00:51:46,574 --> 00:51:48,543 it's been brewing for a long time. 1155 00:51:48,576 --> 00:51:50,177 Well, what happened? 1156 00:51:50,210 --> 00:51:52,312 Creative differences. 1157 00:51:52,346 --> 00:51:55,415 I was writing new material, and... 1158 00:51:55,449 --> 00:51:58,786 they wanted to keep playing the same old shit. 1159 00:52:00,588 --> 00:52:02,657 I'm so sorry. 1160 00:52:05,093 --> 00:52:06,493 It's cool. 1161 00:52:07,494 --> 00:52:10,531 Really, it's cool. I mean... 1162 00:52:10,565 --> 00:52:12,867 At first, I freaked out 'cause I thought, 1163 00:52:12,900 --> 00:52:15,268 "Is this my only identity?" And... 1164 00:52:16,336 --> 00:52:19,974 But then it... it granted my freedom. 1165 00:52:20,008 --> 00:52:21,576 This exercise really worked. 1166 00:52:21,609 --> 00:52:24,177 - Yeah. - Yeah. 1167 00:52:24,211 --> 00:52:26,279 I feel like I'm awake 1168 00:52:26,313 --> 00:52:28,482 after 20 fucking years, you know? 1169 00:52:28,516 --> 00:52:31,586 I have all this music in my head. 1170 00:52:32,820 --> 00:52:35,757 Sing something. 1171 00:53:09,524 --> 00:53:12,694 -It's all yours. -I still love that song. 1172 00:53:15,029 --> 00:53:16,329 We wrote a good one. 1173 00:53:32,980 --> 00:53:35,382 - Are we leaving? - No. 1174 00:53:35,415 --> 00:53:37,250 W-w-where are we going? 1175 00:53:39,520 --> 00:53:40,955 Oh, bingo. 1176 00:53:42,222 --> 00:53:45,126 Oh! 1177 00:53:45,159 --> 00:53:46,994 -Hey, Pen, Pen, Pen. -Yes? 1178 00:53:47,028 --> 00:53:48,495 -They have the same vase. -What? 1179 00:53:48,529 --> 00:53:51,264 They have the same vase as us. Look. 1180 00:53:53,500 --> 00:53:55,335 Is that why you brought me in here? 1181 00:53:55,368 --> 00:53:56,804 -No, no, no. -Okay. 1182 00:53:56,838 --> 00:53:58,472 I brought you in here 1183 00:53:58,506 --> 00:54:00,508 to get you alone, to tell you 1184 00:54:00,541 --> 00:54:04,311 just how beautiful you are. 1185 00:54:04,344 --> 00:54:06,180 Sam, I don't feel very beautiful. 1186 00:54:06,214 --> 00:54:07,347 -Well, you are. -Thank you. 1187 00:54:07,380 --> 00:54:08,950 You're stunning. 1188 00:54:08,983 --> 00:54:11,219 -Oh, sorry! Sorry. -Fuck! Ah! 1189 00:54:11,251 --> 00:54:12,954 - Ah! - Sorry. 1190 00:54:12,987 --> 00:54:14,155 Wait, wait, wait. 1191 00:54:14,188 --> 00:54:15,455 Sam, what are you doing? 1192 00:54:15,489 --> 00:54:18,626 I thought I would just seize the moment. 1193 00:54:19,227 --> 00:54:21,596 I'm scared to have a baby. 1194 00:54:23,363 --> 00:54:26,466 I mean, I'm scared of my whole life 1195 00:54:26,500 --> 00:54:29,637 just stopping and becoming all about the baby, 1196 00:54:29,670 --> 00:54:33,141 and I am not ready for that to happen right now. 1197 00:54:33,174 --> 00:54:34,809 I'm scared too. 1198 00:54:34,842 --> 00:54:36,210 You are? 1199 00:54:36,244 --> 00:54:37,712 Yeah, everyone's scared. 1200 00:54:37,745 --> 00:54:41,281 I mean, I don't even know if I would be a good mom. 1201 00:54:42,617 --> 00:54:46,419 Right now, I love spending my time at work 1202 00:54:46,453 --> 00:54:47,722 and on the podcast, 1203 00:54:47,755 --> 00:54:50,958 and I'm really, really good at it. 1204 00:54:52,392 --> 00:54:54,562 And it makes me really happy. 1205 00:54:56,864 --> 00:54:59,667 I don't want to resent you 1206 00:54:59,700 --> 00:55:02,637 for having to give that up because, then, 1207 00:55:02,670 --> 00:55:05,807 I really wouldn't be a good mom. 1208 00:55:07,542 --> 00:55:09,342 You'd be a great mom. 1209 00:55:16,250 --> 00:55:17,885 Thank you. 1210 00:55:19,587 --> 00:55:24,491 But I think that somebody who wants to be a mom... 1211 00:55:24,525 --> 00:55:27,862 should really, really want that. 1212 00:55:29,163 --> 00:55:30,430 I haven't slept, 1213 00:55:30,463 --> 00:55:33,734 and everything is still fucking sore. 1214 00:55:33,768 --> 00:55:37,470 I don't feel like myself. I feel fucking gross. 1215 00:55:38,172 --> 00:55:39,740 Okay? 1216 00:55:41,408 --> 00:55:44,111 I'm not in my body. 1217 00:55:44,145 --> 00:55:46,479 It's like it still belongs to Rocco. 1218 00:55:46,514 --> 00:55:48,583 I just wish I was with him. 1219 00:55:48,616 --> 00:55:50,350 That's all I can think about. 1220 00:55:50,383 --> 00:55:53,054 Me too, 100%. 1221 00:55:53,087 --> 00:55:54,822 It's just, given the circumstances, 1222 00:55:54,856 --> 00:55:58,159 I thought we'd finally be able to have a little sexy-sex. 1223 00:55:58,192 --> 00:56:01,295 What kind of person wants to have sex at a time like this? 1224 00:56:11,839 --> 00:56:13,641 Doesn't it bother you how long it's been? 1225 00:56:13,674 --> 00:56:17,578 Honestly, Sam, I am so tired... 1226 00:56:17,612 --> 00:56:20,147 -I don't think about it. -Oh, you don't think about it? 1227 00:56:20,181 --> 00:56:23,483 Well, that's a fucking problem, Pen. 1228 00:56:23,517 --> 00:56:25,418 I guess it is a problem, Sam. 1229 00:56:25,452 --> 00:56:27,154 Well, do you think, you know, 1230 00:56:27,188 --> 00:56:30,490 hypothetically, if we survive this, 1231 00:56:30,524 --> 00:56:32,526 will you ever be ready? 1232 00:56:35,462 --> 00:56:37,064 I don't know. 1233 00:56:39,867 --> 00:56:41,769 Is it me? 1234 00:56:43,436 --> 00:56:46,841 I think everything happened so fast with us. We... 1235 00:56:46,874 --> 00:56:49,442 Going out, then pregnant, and married, 1236 00:56:49,476 --> 00:56:50,945 within a year and a half. 1237 00:56:50,978 --> 00:56:53,314 I thought you wanted to get married. 1238 00:56:53,347 --> 00:56:54,982 <i>You</i> wanted to get married. 1239 00:56:55,016 --> 00:56:57,752 You were pregnant. 1240 00:56:58,451 --> 00:57:00,621 Yeah... 1241 00:57:00,655 --> 00:57:02,990 Is that the only reason we did it? 1242 00:57:03,024 --> 00:57:06,694 No, it's not the only reason we did it. 1243 00:57:06,727 --> 00:57:09,563 We did it because we love each other. 1244 00:57:13,234 --> 00:57:14,568 Do you love me? 1245 00:57:16,137 --> 00:57:17,872 Oh my God. 1246 00:57:20,841 --> 00:57:24,211 You are the father of my son. 1247 00:57:24,245 --> 00:57:25,980 Of course... 1248 00:57:27,615 --> 00:57:29,550 I have love for you. 1249 00:57:29,583 --> 00:57:32,086 You "have love" for me? 1250 00:57:32,119 --> 00:57:33,821 Who says that? 1251 00:57:34,422 --> 00:57:37,124 I love you. 1252 00:57:39,160 --> 00:57:41,262 -You don't love me? -I said I have love for you. 1253 00:57:41,295 --> 00:57:42,964 I don't know what you want me to say, Sam. 1254 00:57:42,997 --> 00:57:44,832 I don't want to hurt you. 1255 00:57:45,333 --> 00:57:46,600 Sam, I'm sorry. 1256 00:57:46,634 --> 00:57:48,501 You... 1257 00:57:48,536 --> 00:57:50,137 You're sorry? 1258 00:57:53,140 --> 00:57:54,308 I'm sorry. 1259 00:57:54,342 --> 00:57:56,243 But just one thing. 1260 00:57:56,277 --> 00:57:58,879 Do you have any idea 1261 00:57:58,913 --> 00:58:02,850 how many women I could've fucked? 1262 00:58:04,385 --> 00:58:06,120 - Excuse me? - Dozens. 1263 00:58:06,153 --> 00:58:08,889 Maybe even in the thirties. Low to mid thirties, 1264 00:58:08,923 --> 00:58:10,558 but definitely somewhere there. 1265 00:58:10,591 --> 00:58:11,792 That's how many women jump at me 1266 00:58:11,826 --> 00:58:13,594 all the fucking time, Pen! 1267 00:58:13,627 --> 00:58:14,662 You want a fucking trophy? 1268 00:58:14,695 --> 00:58:16,130 I don't want a fucking trophy. 1269 00:58:16,163 --> 00:58:18,065 Then why are you telling me? 1270 00:58:20,668 --> 00:58:23,204 Why are you telling me? Just to hurt me? 1271 00:58:24,505 --> 00:58:26,107 How can I hurt you? 1272 00:58:26,140 --> 00:58:27,975 You're fucking heartless! 1273 00:58:34,215 --> 00:58:35,483 Fuck you. 1274 00:58:41,989 --> 00:58:43,357 I missed you. 1275 00:58:43,391 --> 00:58:45,760 I missed you too. 1276 00:58:45,793 --> 00:58:47,328 So much. 1277 00:58:52,733 --> 00:58:55,603 I tried so hard to forget about you. 1278 00:58:55,636 --> 00:58:57,471 I couldn't. 1279 00:58:57,506 --> 00:58:59,540 You know? 1280 00:58:59,573 --> 00:59:02,076 I just... 1281 00:59:02,109 --> 00:59:05,246 I never found anyone who compared to you. 1282 00:59:08,349 --> 00:59:10,151 I love you, Mo. 1283 00:59:12,420 --> 00:59:14,221 I love you too. 1284 00:59:18,459 --> 00:59:19,894 Mmm. 1285 00:59:24,098 --> 00:59:26,500 -Should we go again? -Yeah, we could do better. 1286 00:59:26,535 --> 00:59:27,568 I think so. 1287 00:59:36,844 --> 00:59:38,279 You have this whole other life, 1288 00:59:38,312 --> 00:59:40,881 this whole other world, and I'm not a part of it. 1289 00:59:40,915 --> 00:59:43,217 And, look, I love that you're happy. 1290 00:59:43,250 --> 00:59:44,618 I do, I love it. 1291 00:59:45,453 --> 00:59:47,288 But I'm not. 1292 00:59:47,321 --> 00:59:48,889 You're not? 1293 00:59:48,923 --> 00:59:51,058 I don't want you to be unhappy, Jack. 1294 00:59:51,092 --> 00:59:54,261 I think maybe I wanted a... a baby 1295 00:59:54,295 --> 00:59:58,132 and to, um, start a family... 1296 00:59:59,400 --> 01:00:02,169 so I can get you back, 1297 01:00:02,203 --> 01:00:04,238 spend more time with you. 1298 01:00:04,271 --> 01:00:07,241 We already are a family, Jack. 1299 01:00:10,211 --> 01:00:12,279 And we always will be. 1300 01:00:15,483 --> 01:00:17,751 A baby doesn't change that. 1301 01:01:00,995 --> 01:01:03,230 -What are you looking at? -Oh my God. 1302 01:01:08,537 --> 01:01:10,404 Is your marriage over? 1303 01:01:12,907 --> 01:01:13,841 What? 1304 01:01:36,096 --> 01:01:38,899 It feels like days. How much longer? 1305 01:01:38,933 --> 01:01:40,768 Could be any minute. Any second. 1306 01:01:40,801 --> 01:01:43,170 This is awful. Just bomb us already! 1307 01:01:43,204 --> 01:01:46,106 I keep thinking about the last few years. 1308 01:01:46,907 --> 01:01:48,809 I went through a year of chemo, 1309 01:01:48,842 --> 01:01:52,246 and then I went right back to work. 1310 01:01:52,279 --> 01:01:54,715 You know, I made all these plans, and I don't... 1311 01:01:54,748 --> 01:01:56,884 I don't know why I didn't do any of them. 1312 01:01:56,917 --> 01:01:59,688 I was gonna travel the world. 1313 01:01:59,720 --> 01:02:01,188 With me? 1314 01:02:04,191 --> 01:02:06,026 Of course. We... 1315 01:02:06,060 --> 01:02:08,495 We should've planned a trip. 1316 01:02:08,530 --> 01:02:11,265 I'm really sorry we never got married. 1317 01:02:15,236 --> 01:02:17,137 -You are? -Yeah. 1318 01:02:17,539 --> 01:02:19,073 I just... 1319 01:02:19,907 --> 01:02:22,042 I think now that... 1320 01:02:22,076 --> 01:02:23,477 you know, I'm on death's door, 1321 01:02:23,511 --> 01:02:26,847 it-it's something that I really wanted all the time, 1322 01:02:26,880 --> 01:02:29,618 and, you know, when I think about... 1323 01:02:30,985 --> 01:02:34,888 When I picture our death, you know, 1324 01:02:34,922 --> 01:02:37,291 like, I mean, obviously you die first. 1325 01:02:37,324 --> 01:02:39,893 -Obviously. -'Cause... 1326 01:02:39,927 --> 01:02:41,195 you're very, very old. 1327 01:02:41,228 --> 01:02:43,464 I'm... seven months older than you. 1328 01:02:43,497 --> 01:02:44,932 Seven and a half months. 1329 01:02:44,965 --> 01:02:46,900 You know, and I just saw us as married 1330 01:02:46,934 --> 01:02:50,505 'cause, you know... 1331 01:02:50,538 --> 01:02:51,905 I'd be the loyal, 1332 01:02:51,939 --> 01:02:54,709 much younger, mournful husband that... 1333 01:02:54,743 --> 01:02:56,243 never left your side. 1334 01:02:56,277 --> 01:02:58,078 -You know? Yeah. -Oh. 1335 01:02:58,112 --> 01:02:59,913 That's sweet. 1336 01:02:59,947 --> 01:03:02,383 And... and kind of morbid. 1337 01:03:05,286 --> 01:03:07,321 I never knew it meant that much to you. 1338 01:03:07,354 --> 01:03:09,691 I think it does. 1339 01:03:09,724 --> 01:03:11,760 We should've done it. 1340 01:03:12,761 --> 01:03:14,428 We should do it now. 1341 01:03:15,630 --> 01:03:16,830 We should do it now. 1342 01:03:16,864 --> 01:03:18,799 -Now? -Yes! 1343 01:03:18,832 --> 01:03:21,068 Why not? What do we have to lose? 1344 01:03:21,101 --> 01:03:23,103 -Nothing, I guess. -Yeah! 1345 01:03:23,937 --> 01:03:25,306 How do we do this? 1346 01:03:25,339 --> 01:03:26,741 How do we do this now? 1347 01:03:26,775 --> 01:03:27,975 I'm ordained. 1348 01:03:28,008 --> 01:03:29,443 - What? - Yeah. 1349 01:03:29,476 --> 01:03:31,178 I did it online last summer 1350 01:03:31,211 --> 01:03:33,347 when our drummer, Julie, and our makeup artist 1351 01:03:33,380 --> 01:03:34,815 got married in Costa Rica. 1352 01:03:34,848 --> 01:03:38,452 Well, that-that's amazing! 1353 01:03:39,721 --> 01:03:41,656 Amazing! He can do it! 1354 01:03:41,690 --> 01:03:43,123 Let's do it! 1355 01:04:10,484 --> 01:04:13,521 Please stop. 1356 01:04:25,567 --> 01:04:26,601 Oh. 1357 01:04:27,535 --> 01:04:29,903 Welcome. 1358 01:04:29,937 --> 01:04:31,706 We did it, guys. 1359 01:04:32,906 --> 01:04:35,075 We're gathered here today for... 1360 01:04:35,109 --> 01:04:39,146 Well, actually, for Jack and Gill's birthday. 1361 01:04:39,179 --> 01:04:42,983 But then the bomb text happened, 1362 01:04:43,016 --> 01:04:45,919 and we all rushed down here, and then... 1363 01:04:45,953 --> 01:04:47,888 other stuff happened. 1364 01:04:50,457 --> 01:04:52,627 Uh, but now we're here, 1365 01:04:52,660 --> 01:04:54,662 celebrating the love 1366 01:04:54,696 --> 01:04:56,430 of Damian and Ishaan. 1367 01:04:57,064 --> 01:04:58,566 You guys ready? 1368 01:04:58,600 --> 01:05:01,536 I'll keep it short 'cause time is of the essence. 1369 01:05:02,604 --> 01:05:04,405 Damian... 1370 01:05:04,438 --> 01:05:07,742 do you take Ishaan to be your wedded husband, 1371 01:05:07,776 --> 01:05:09,376 to be your partner in life, 1372 01:05:09,410 --> 01:05:12,279 to share a path of life with, equal in love, 1373 01:05:12,312 --> 01:05:15,650 embraced as a mirror of your true self, 1374 01:05:15,683 --> 01:05:19,319 to honor and cherish, through good times and bad? 1375 01:05:19,854 --> 01:05:21,388 I do. 1376 01:05:23,858 --> 01:05:25,560 Great answer, buddy. 1377 01:05:25,593 --> 01:05:27,961 Sorry, I just... I forgot this. 1378 01:05:27,995 --> 01:05:29,898 Yeah. There it is. 1379 01:05:29,930 --> 01:05:31,533 -Thank you. -It fits. 1380 01:05:33,333 --> 01:05:34,368 -Ishaan. -Huh? 1381 01:05:34,401 --> 01:05:36,303 Same question. 1382 01:05:36,336 --> 01:05:38,840 Do you take Damian to be your wedded husband, 1383 01:05:38,873 --> 01:05:40,307 to be your partner in life, 1384 01:05:40,340 --> 01:05:45,112 to share a path of life with, equal in love, 1385 01:05:45,145 --> 01:05:47,882 to honor, to cherish him, 1386 01:05:47,916 --> 01:05:49,116 through good times and bad? 1387 01:05:53,387 --> 01:05:54,722 Just get it on. 1388 01:05:54,756 --> 01:05:56,023 -No, I can't. -What? 1389 01:05:57,826 --> 01:05:59,794 Oh, God! It's happening! 1390 01:06:02,229 --> 01:06:04,866 -Oh my God! -Was that it? 1391 01:06:04,899 --> 01:06:07,067 -Was that it? -I don't know. 1392 01:06:07,100 --> 01:06:08,335 Is it over? 1393 01:06:08,368 --> 01:06:10,070 It might've just been the first one. 1394 01:06:10,103 --> 01:06:12,139 -Oh, shit. -What? 1395 01:06:12,172 --> 01:06:14,408 - The chef. - We need to go get her. 1396 01:06:14,441 --> 01:06:17,144 - I'll go. - No. She's dead. 1397 01:06:17,177 --> 01:06:19,446 No. I planned this. It's my responsibility. 1398 01:06:19,480 --> 01:06:20,481 I can go. 1399 01:06:20,515 --> 01:06:22,382 There might be nuclear fallout, Penelope. 1400 01:06:22,416 --> 01:06:24,351 -I'm going upstairs. -Pen, no, no! 1401 01:06:24,384 --> 01:06:26,955 I am going the fuck upstairs! 1402 01:06:26,987 --> 01:06:29,022 Wait! 1403 01:06:29,056 --> 01:06:30,959 I'm going with you. 1404 01:06:30,991 --> 01:06:33,160 Fine. 1405 01:06:33,193 --> 01:06:35,830 Wait! 1406 01:06:35,864 --> 01:06:37,264 -Shit! -Jesus Christ! 1407 01:06:37,297 --> 01:06:39,266 You're gonna need protection. 1408 01:06:39,299 --> 01:06:41,001 Why are you screaming that? 1409 01:06:41,034 --> 01:06:42,537 Fuck, Gill. 1410 01:07:01,488 --> 01:07:03,357 Fuck. Chef? 1411 01:07:03,390 --> 01:07:05,125 Chef? 1412 01:07:05,158 --> 01:07:07,896 -Pen! -Oh my God! 1413 01:07:09,764 --> 01:07:11,064 Oh my God! 1414 01:07:11,098 --> 01:07:13,166 -Still breathing. -Oh, thank God. 1415 01:07:13,200 --> 01:07:15,168 I wouldn't normally move her in this state, 1416 01:07:15,202 --> 01:07:18,038 but given the circumstances... 1417 01:07:18,071 --> 01:07:20,508 Pen? Pen? Grab her legs. 1418 01:07:20,542 --> 01:07:22,142 -Come on. -Okay. 1419 01:07:22,175 --> 01:07:24,512 Ready? One, two, three, go. 1420 01:07:24,546 --> 01:07:26,848 Okay. Move it, move it. 1421 01:07:26,881 --> 01:07:27,949 -Okay. -Let's go. 1422 01:07:27,982 --> 01:07:29,216 -Easy, easy. -Sam, faster. 1423 01:07:29,249 --> 01:07:30,552 No, no, no. Easy, easy. 1424 01:07:30,585 --> 01:07:32,319 Okay. 1425 01:07:40,294 --> 01:07:42,730 - Pen! - Shit. 1426 01:07:44,866 --> 01:07:46,099 Fucking hell... 1427 01:07:46,133 --> 01:07:47,969 There's no bomb. 1428 01:07:48,002 --> 01:07:49,436 What? 1429 01:07:52,239 --> 01:07:54,842 There's no fucking bomb. 1430 01:07:57,077 --> 01:07:59,581 Pen! Oh, shit! 1431 01:08:00,982 --> 01:08:03,116 Oh, God. 1432 01:08:03,150 --> 01:08:05,019 There's no bomb! 1433 01:08:05,053 --> 01:08:06,386 -What? -What?! 1434 01:08:06,420 --> 01:08:08,690 "There is no missile threat or danger 1435 01:08:08,723 --> 01:08:11,124 to the state of California. 1436 01:08:11,158 --> 01:08:13,393 Repeat. False alarm." 1437 01:08:13,427 --> 01:08:15,730 -Oh my God! -Is it real? 1438 01:08:15,763 --> 01:08:18,365 We're gonna live! 1439 01:08:18,398 --> 01:08:21,569 Oh my goodness! 1440 01:08:21,603 --> 01:08:24,338 Let's get the fuck outta this basement then! 1441 01:08:24,371 --> 01:08:27,240 Yeah, yeah. Wait, but... but what was that explosion? 1442 01:08:27,274 --> 01:08:29,077 Oh my God. I'm gonna get outta here. 1443 01:08:29,109 --> 01:08:30,678 Oh my God! 1444 01:08:30,712 --> 01:08:33,413 Oh, shit. Guys, hey, we-- I'm sorry, babe. 1445 01:08:33,447 --> 01:08:35,083 We should get Jack to the couch 1446 01:08:35,115 --> 01:08:36,383 so he can put his foot up. 1447 01:08:36,416 --> 01:08:38,151 Sorry. He just needs to sit down. 1448 01:08:38,185 --> 01:08:40,487 Okay. It's okay. We're almost there. 1449 01:08:40,521 --> 01:08:43,457 Oh, let me get a pillow here. 1450 01:08:43,490 --> 01:08:46,594 Oh my God. 1451 01:08:46,628 --> 01:08:49,329 Oh. 1452 01:08:49,363 --> 01:08:51,264 -I got the same text. -So did I. 1453 01:08:51,298 --> 01:08:53,166 Lana texted. She and Rocco are gonna be okay. 1454 01:08:53,200 --> 01:08:54,802 My parents are okay. 1455 01:08:54,836 --> 01:08:56,503 They were hiding in their garage. 1456 01:08:56,537 --> 01:08:58,171 I mean, was this a false alarm? 1457 01:08:58,205 --> 01:08:59,607 What the fuck? It's so fucked up. 1458 01:08:59,641 --> 01:09:02,910 Who would fuck up a nuclear bomb? 1459 01:09:02,944 --> 01:09:04,378 The system was hacked. 1460 01:09:04,411 --> 01:09:05,780 We can't know exactly what happened for sure. 1461 01:09:05,813 --> 01:09:07,982 Another country hacked our emergency alert system 1462 01:09:08,016 --> 01:09:09,617 and fucked the shit out of all of us. 1463 01:09:09,651 --> 01:09:12,020 Again, Ishaan, we don't know it was another country. 1464 01:09:12,053 --> 01:09:14,956 It could've just been a guy in his underwear in Michigan. 1465 01:09:14,989 --> 01:09:19,226 There's really only one thing we can know for sure. 1466 01:09:19,259 --> 01:09:20,762 We wouldn't have known any of this 1467 01:09:20,795 --> 01:09:23,163 if it wasn't for... a phone. 1468 01:09:27,167 --> 01:09:28,569 What? 1469 01:09:29,637 --> 01:09:31,739 Why are you looking at me like that? 1470 01:09:31,773 --> 01:09:33,273 Well... 1471 01:09:34,509 --> 01:09:36,309 Penelope... 1472 01:09:36,343 --> 01:09:38,546 because if you didn't... 1473 01:09:38,579 --> 01:09:40,414 sneaky-sneaky 1474 01:09:40,447 --> 01:09:42,884 and go grab the unplug box, 1475 01:09:42,917 --> 01:09:46,954 we would still be celebrating our birthday party. 1476 01:09:46,988 --> 01:09:48,056 -Mm-hmm. -Hmm? 1477 01:09:48,089 --> 01:09:50,323 Maybe eatin' some of that... 1478 01:09:50,357 --> 01:09:52,760 -Thug Pussy, was it? -Yeah. Mm-hmm. 1479 01:09:52,794 --> 01:09:54,829 Wouldn't have experienced any of this. 1480 01:09:54,862 --> 01:09:56,130 No, none of it. 1481 01:09:56,164 --> 01:09:57,732 Who has a no-phone party 1482 01:09:57,765 --> 01:10:00,535 and invites the mother of a newborn? 1483 01:10:01,401 --> 01:10:04,237 Well, I'll tell you who. Me. I do. 1484 01:10:04,271 --> 01:10:05,673 -He does. -Yeah. 1485 01:10:05,707 --> 01:10:07,642 You don't have kids, so you don't understand. 1486 01:10:07,675 --> 01:10:10,243 -That's a little insensitive. -Oh, shut up. 1487 01:10:10,277 --> 01:10:12,446 It's just a fact, Gill. 1488 01:10:12,479 --> 01:10:14,381 Okay, first of all, don't tell my wife to shut up. 1489 01:10:14,414 --> 01:10:15,750 -Thank you. -New mothers 1490 01:10:15,783 --> 01:10:18,452 really shouldn't be away from their babies 1491 01:10:18,485 --> 01:10:20,387 in the first few months. 1492 01:10:20,420 --> 01:10:21,856 That sounds very judgy. 1493 01:10:21,889 --> 01:10:24,291 And they definitely should not be attending 1494 01:10:24,324 --> 01:10:27,195 no-phone parties unknowingly. 1495 01:10:27,227 --> 01:10:28,596 -Called unplug parties. -Absolutely. 1496 01:10:28,629 --> 01:10:30,832 It is to get old friends together 1497 01:10:30,865 --> 01:10:32,299 -to connect... -Connect. 1498 01:10:32,332 --> 01:10:34,135 -...without phones! -Absolutely right. 1499 01:10:34,168 --> 01:10:35,536 Which we would have done 1500 01:10:35,570 --> 01:10:38,139 -if you didn't grab yours. -Mm-hmm. 1501 01:10:38,172 --> 01:10:39,574 I didn't ask to escape reality 1502 01:10:39,607 --> 01:10:42,309 and I didn't create this disaster. 1503 01:10:42,342 --> 01:10:44,712 It's not my fault. 1504 01:10:44,746 --> 01:10:45,847 -Mmm... -Eh... 1505 01:10:45,880 --> 01:10:47,414 -Except it kinda is. -Yeah. 1506 01:10:47,447 --> 01:10:49,416 Even Gill took the night off, and she's addicted 1507 01:10:49,449 --> 01:10:51,152 -to her fucking phone. -Thank you. 1508 01:10:51,185 --> 01:10:53,054 Fine. 1509 01:10:53,087 --> 01:10:55,223 If it makes you feel better, blame me. 1510 01:10:55,255 --> 01:10:56,758 I don't give a shit. 1511 01:10:56,791 --> 01:10:58,391 I think I'm gonna go now. 1512 01:10:58,425 --> 01:11:00,561 -Okay. -Okay, that sounds great. 1513 01:11:00,595 --> 01:11:02,663 -You coming? -Do you even want me 1514 01:11:02,697 --> 01:11:04,632 to come with you? 1515 01:11:04,665 --> 01:11:06,667 I'm going to be with our son, Sam. 1516 01:11:06,701 --> 01:11:09,237 -Are you coming? -It's late, and it's far, 1517 01:11:09,269 --> 01:11:11,271 and Rocco's probably asleep by now. 1518 01:11:11,304 --> 01:11:12,874 -Oh my God. -He's fine, Pen. 1519 01:11:12,907 --> 01:11:15,710 -Your priorities are fucked. -Oh, my priorities? 1520 01:11:15,743 --> 01:11:17,779 You just told me you don't fucking love me, 1521 01:11:17,812 --> 01:11:18,780 so don't come at me 1522 01:11:18,813 --> 01:11:20,248 with your fucking priorities right now. 1523 01:11:20,280 --> 01:11:21,983 -I'm done. -Okay, see you later. 1524 01:11:22,016 --> 01:11:23,184 No, you won't. 1525 01:11:23,217 --> 01:11:26,621 Thank you for a horrible evening, everyone. 1526 01:11:26,654 --> 01:11:27,420 Good night. 1527 01:11:27,454 --> 01:11:29,090 Good night! 1528 01:11:36,363 --> 01:11:38,365 Sammy. Sammy, boy. 1529 01:11:38,398 --> 01:11:39,466 Hold on, I got... 1530 01:11:39,499 --> 01:11:42,203 Hey. 1531 01:11:42,236 --> 01:11:44,972 - Honey? - I'm sorry, man. 1532 01:11:46,240 --> 01:11:49,277 Did you have any fun? 1533 01:11:49,309 --> 01:11:50,978 -Yeah, she did. -Um... 1534 01:11:53,848 --> 01:11:55,616 What happened down there? 1535 01:11:55,650 --> 01:11:57,985 Why'd you say you can't? 1536 01:11:58,019 --> 01:11:59,352 Can we talk about this later? 1537 01:11:59,386 --> 01:12:00,621 No, I want to talk about it right now. 1538 01:12:00,655 --> 01:12:03,390 I don't want to upset you, Damian. 1539 01:12:03,423 --> 01:12:05,660 No, it's too late for that. 1540 01:12:07,595 --> 01:12:10,463 Hon, I've always been very honest 1541 01:12:10,497 --> 01:12:12,365 about my feelings on marriage. 1542 01:12:12,399 --> 01:12:14,569 I'm not a big fan. I never have been. 1543 01:12:14,602 --> 01:12:16,771 I was open with you about that from the very first day. 1544 01:12:16,804 --> 01:12:18,873 Yeah, exactly. That was in the beginning. 1545 01:12:18,906 --> 01:12:20,741 -That was years ago. -Nothing has changed. 1546 01:12:20,775 --> 01:12:22,342 -Everything's changed. -What's changed? 1547 01:12:22,375 --> 01:12:23,511 Every... You and I have changed. 1548 01:12:23,544 --> 01:12:24,846 We've been together for ten years. 1549 01:12:24,879 --> 01:12:25,913 I got you through cancer. 1550 01:12:25,947 --> 01:12:28,149 I love you so much, Damian. I... 1551 01:12:28,182 --> 01:12:29,917 -Do you? -Yes! 1552 01:12:29,951 --> 01:12:32,320 I am a child of divorce. 1553 01:12:32,352 --> 01:12:34,622 I am... I am a divorce attorney. 1554 01:12:34,655 --> 01:12:36,791 I know better. I have seen the worst in people. 1555 01:12:36,824 --> 01:12:39,459 Well, then why did you agree to it down in the basement? 1556 01:12:39,492 --> 01:12:40,995 I was in shock! 1557 01:12:41,028 --> 01:12:44,732 You asked me to do it in front of all of <i>your</i> friends. 1558 01:12:44,765 --> 01:12:46,234 We thought... 1559 01:12:46,267 --> 01:12:47,902 We thought we were gonna die. 1560 01:12:47,935 --> 01:12:51,105 Oh, okay, so that's the only way you'd marry me. 1561 01:12:53,307 --> 01:12:54,508 Cool. 1562 01:12:55,543 --> 01:12:56,644 I think that we both just need to take 1563 01:12:56,677 --> 01:12:57,945 a couple breaths. 1564 01:12:57,979 --> 01:12:59,547 It's been a really long night, Damian. 1565 01:12:59,580 --> 01:13:02,316 The night's just getting started, party people! 1566 01:13:02,350 --> 01:13:04,986 -What?! -Oh my God, Chef Sasha. 1567 01:13:05,019 --> 01:13:06,888 Oh, it's kickin' in, huh? 1568 01:13:06,921 --> 01:13:09,389 -What happened to you? -Oh, I am so sorry. 1569 01:13:09,422 --> 01:13:11,391 My liquid nitrogen tank exploded 1570 01:13:11,424 --> 01:13:12,627 and I blacked out for a bit. 1571 01:13:12,660 --> 01:13:14,128 But, all good now. 1572 01:13:14,161 --> 01:13:15,395 That was the sound. 1573 01:13:15,428 --> 01:13:17,298 Um, I-I do have 1574 01:13:17,331 --> 01:13:19,000 some bad news. 1575 01:13:19,367 --> 01:13:20,868 What? 1576 01:13:24,605 --> 01:13:27,008 There is no side of sorbet. 1577 01:13:27,440 --> 01:13:28,576 -Oh. -Oh! 1578 01:13:28,609 --> 01:13:30,177 -We don't need sorbet. -Yeah. 1579 01:13:30,211 --> 01:13:31,712 I would actually like some sorbet. 1580 01:13:31,746 --> 01:13:33,581 Well, she's had a long night, you know? 1581 01:13:33,614 --> 01:13:36,416 <i>She</i> has? 1582 01:13:40,487 --> 01:13:42,556 I only have the lemon blueberry pavlova 1583 01:13:42,590 --> 01:13:44,525 with cannabutter and the tiramisu 1584 01:13:44,558 --> 01:13:46,459 with coconut-infused mascarpone 1585 01:13:46,493 --> 01:13:48,428 for my vegan brother, 1586 01:13:48,461 --> 01:13:51,332 both coming in at a solid 15 milligrams 1587 01:13:51,365 --> 01:13:53,067 of THC per ser-- 1588 01:13:56,804 --> 01:13:58,706 I'm fine, it's just the nitrogen poisoning. 1589 01:13:58,739 --> 01:14:00,541 It'll wear off in a few weeks. 1590 01:14:00,574 --> 01:14:02,310 -Okay. -Both desserts use 1591 01:14:02,343 --> 01:14:04,378 one of my favorite strains, 1592 01:14:04,412 --> 01:14:05,947 -Pink Punani... -Of course. 1593 01:14:05,980 --> 01:14:09,216 ...which should help you unleash your creativity, 1594 01:14:09,250 --> 01:14:10,851 like it did mine. 1595 01:14:13,621 --> 01:14:15,589 -Oh... my God. -Wow. 1596 01:14:15,623 --> 01:14:17,925 -Okay. -Center of the table, please. 1597 01:14:17,959 --> 01:14:22,163 Oh, God, that's so beautiful! 1598 01:14:23,664 --> 01:14:25,733 Please don't touch it till after I leave. 1599 01:14:25,766 --> 01:14:27,668 -You got it. Of course. -Thank you. 1600 01:14:27,702 --> 01:14:30,771 Well, I don't want to, uh, hold up the party, 1601 01:14:30,805 --> 01:14:32,740 and I think I should lie down 1602 01:14:32,773 --> 01:14:34,775 and probably drink some vinegar. 1603 01:14:34,809 --> 01:14:37,578 I have had such an amazing time 1604 01:14:37,611 --> 01:14:39,479 getting to know each and every one of you 1605 01:14:39,513 --> 01:14:41,849 and being your guide on this journey. 1606 01:14:41,882 --> 01:14:43,851 Thank you so much 1607 01:14:43,884 --> 01:14:45,319 and, truly, 1608 01:14:45,353 --> 01:14:46,654 namaste. 1609 01:14:46,687 --> 01:14:48,456 -Thank you so much. -Thank you. 1610 01:14:48,488 --> 01:14:50,157 -Thank you, Chef Sasha. -Chef Sasha. 1611 01:14:53,828 --> 01:14:55,663 She doesn't even know. 1612 01:14:55,696 --> 01:14:57,798 Maybe when she blacked out, 1613 01:14:57,832 --> 01:14:59,233 she forgot about the bomb? 1614 01:14:59,266 --> 01:15:01,969 She probably turns her phone off when she's working 1615 01:15:02,003 --> 01:15:05,139 so she can stay... present and be in the moment 1616 01:15:05,172 --> 01:15:08,976 and actually enjoy the experience of cooking. 1617 01:15:09,010 --> 01:15:11,545 Those desserts do look pretty good. 1618 01:15:11,579 --> 01:15:13,280 Yeah, they do. 1619 01:15:13,314 --> 01:15:14,949 Here, hold this. 1620 01:15:16,517 --> 01:15:18,052 Excuse me. 1621 01:15:18,586 --> 01:15:20,054 Excuse me. 1622 01:15:22,590 --> 01:15:24,191 Where are you going, honey? 1623 01:15:32,800 --> 01:15:34,568 What's she doing? 1624 01:15:35,736 --> 01:15:38,406 -Oh, shit! -What... did that go... 1625 01:15:38,439 --> 01:15:40,808 That is so punk rock! Yes! 1626 01:15:40,841 --> 01:15:43,411 Oh my God! I can't believe I did that! 1627 01:15:43,444 --> 01:15:45,346 I just threw 1628 01:15:45,379 --> 01:15:46,580 my phone in the fire! 1629 01:15:46,614 --> 01:15:47,748 Yeah, you fucking did! 1630 01:15:47,782 --> 01:15:49,717 And it felt so fucking good! 1631 01:15:49,750 --> 01:15:52,486 Come on! 1632 01:15:52,521 --> 01:15:53,821 Come on, who's with me? 1633 01:15:53,854 --> 01:15:55,122 - I'm with you. - Yes, Logan! 1634 01:15:55,156 --> 01:15:56,991 -Give me your phone! -I don't know where mine is. 1635 01:15:57,024 --> 01:15:58,926 He doesn't even know where his phone is! 1636 01:15:58,959 --> 01:16:00,361 That's perfect. Mo, come on. Sam. 1637 01:16:00,394 --> 01:16:03,597 Let's throw all of our phones in the fucking fire! 1638 01:16:03,631 --> 01:16:05,466 Let's feel free! 1639 01:16:05,499 --> 01:16:06,600 - Wow. - Jack. 1640 01:16:06,634 --> 01:16:09,303 My darling, I'll help you. 1641 01:16:09,336 --> 01:16:11,772 Yes! Yes! 1642 01:16:11,806 --> 01:16:13,741 I love you so much! 1643 01:16:13,774 --> 01:16:16,143 Hey, I love you too. 1644 01:16:16,177 --> 01:16:19,180 Oh, yeah! That's hot. 1645 01:16:21,282 --> 01:16:22,750 - You can do this! - Proud of you, buddy. 1646 01:16:22,783 --> 01:16:24,618 -Come on! Come on! -You can do this! 1647 01:16:24,652 --> 01:16:25,786 Do it! Oh. 1648 01:16:25,820 --> 01:16:27,721 -I missed. -I'll get it for you. 1649 01:16:27,755 --> 01:16:28,756 -Okay. -I'll get it. 1650 01:16:28,789 --> 01:16:30,257 Okay. 1651 01:16:30,291 --> 01:16:32,259 Ow. Ow. Okay. 1652 01:16:33,694 --> 01:16:35,429 Yes. 1653 01:16:36,597 --> 01:16:38,499 Doesn't that feel good? 1654 01:16:38,533 --> 01:16:40,768 It would've felt better if I made it, but yeah. 1655 01:16:40,801 --> 01:16:42,369 Here, come on, it's okay. 1656 01:16:42,403 --> 01:16:44,038 Let's watch it burn. 1657 01:16:45,473 --> 01:16:46,774 I mean, I'm fully with them, 1658 01:16:46,807 --> 01:16:49,877 but I think I'm just gonna put it on vibrate. 1659 01:16:49,910 --> 01:16:51,712 Right? 1660 01:16:51,745 --> 01:16:54,181 We're gonna be okay, right? 1661 01:16:55,382 --> 01:16:57,251 I hope so. 1662 01:16:57,284 --> 01:16:59,320 It would suck if we weren't. 1663 01:17:06,127 --> 01:17:10,664 I promise to make more time for you, 1664 01:17:10,698 --> 01:17:12,601 and I won't let so much time go by 1665 01:17:12,633 --> 01:17:15,269 without connecting with you, okay? 1666 01:17:16,036 --> 01:17:17,938 Okay. 1667 01:17:17,972 --> 01:17:20,841 I promise not to smoke so much pot on the couch. 1668 01:17:20,875 --> 01:17:23,110 - Oh! - I'll... 1669 01:17:23,144 --> 01:17:26,046 try to mix it up and smoke some on the patio instead. 1670 01:17:33,220 --> 01:17:35,557 We can't say anything about anything. 1671 01:17:35,590 --> 01:17:37,626 Just... act normal. 1672 01:17:37,658 --> 01:17:39,260 Nothing happened. 1673 01:17:40,661 --> 01:17:43,130 Yeah, no, I can't do that. 1674 01:17:44,732 --> 01:17:48,969 -You have to. -I can't, because... 1675 01:17:49,003 --> 01:17:51,805 you told me you're still in love with me, Mo. 1676 01:17:55,644 --> 01:17:57,244 Well, it was an intense moment. 1677 01:17:57,278 --> 01:17:59,013 I thought we were gonna die. 1678 01:17:59,046 --> 01:18:02,816 Right, but isn't that when people share 1679 01:18:02,850 --> 01:18:05,052 their most intimate thoughts? 1680 01:18:11,759 --> 01:18:13,562 We'll get through anything, 1681 01:18:13,595 --> 01:18:15,996 as long as I don't lose you. 1682 01:18:16,030 --> 01:18:17,398 No. 1683 01:18:17,932 --> 01:18:20,134 You'll never lose me. 1684 01:18:21,636 --> 01:18:23,437 You're my family. 1685 01:18:25,839 --> 01:18:27,808 I love you... 1686 01:18:28,475 --> 01:18:30,077 so... 1687 01:18:30,110 --> 01:18:32,479 fucking much. 1688 01:18:34,048 --> 01:18:38,252 Well, I love you so fucking much. 1689 01:19:44,184 --> 01:19:46,954 You guys, you sound so beautiful together. 1690 01:19:46,987 --> 01:19:49,658 Ah. Oldie but a goodie. 1691 01:19:49,691 --> 01:19:51,158 Hey! We haven't sung 1692 01:19:51,191 --> 01:19:52,860 "Happy Birthday" to these two yet. 1693 01:19:52,893 --> 01:19:54,962 - Yeah! - No, you don't have to sing. 1694 01:19:54,995 --> 01:19:56,930 -Yes, we do. -Yes, we do, 1695 01:19:56,964 --> 01:19:58,832 and here's your key, everybody. 1696 01:20:17,786 --> 01:20:19,521 Aw, thank you. 1697 01:20:19,554 --> 01:20:22,657 -I love you guys so much. -Yeah, we love you guys. 1698 01:20:22,691 --> 01:20:25,059 Let's eat! Ow! 1699 01:20:25,092 --> 01:20:27,261 Great idea. Ooh, I want one of these thingies. 1700 01:20:27,294 --> 01:20:28,996 Ooh, I want one of these. 1701 01:20:29,029 --> 01:20:30,264 Give me a little of that tiramisu. 1702 01:20:30,297 --> 01:20:32,600 - Do you want some? - Yes, please. 1703 01:20:34,435 --> 01:20:36,771 Oh! Oh! Oh! Ah! 1704 01:20:39,774 --> 01:20:41,643 Oh! 1705 01:20:41,676 --> 01:20:44,311 Mmm! Oh my God! 1706 01:20:52,019 --> 01:20:53,921 Feels good to be alive. 1707 01:20:54,955 --> 01:20:57,024 - It really does. - You guys... 1708 01:21:00,361 --> 01:21:04,431 It's time for a dance party! Whoo! 1709 01:21:04,465 --> 01:21:07,134 - Come on! Guys... - She's lost her mind. 1710 01:21:07,167 --> 01:21:10,070 Let's do it. No, no, no. We need some music. 1711 01:21:10,104 --> 01:21:12,373 Oh, there it goes. 1712 01:21:12,406 --> 01:21:15,242 I love this song! Let's turn it up! 1713 01:21:15,275 --> 01:21:17,177 Yeah! Oh my God! 1714 01:21:17,211 --> 01:21:19,913 - Let's do it. - Yes, I knew you would. 1715 01:21:19,947 --> 01:21:20,981 Bring it, girl. 1716 01:21:21,014 --> 01:21:23,083 Come on! 1717 01:21:23,117 --> 01:21:25,185 You want to dance with me? I am crazy! 1718 01:21:25,219 --> 01:21:28,021 I know you still got those moves. Come on! 1719 01:21:28,055 --> 01:21:30,124 Come on. Yes, girl! Mo... 1720 01:21:40,401 --> 01:21:42,970 Yes! 1721 01:21:43,003 --> 01:21:45,573 Yes! Come on, Sam! 1722 01:21:46,173 --> 01:21:47,207 I'm 40... 1723 01:21:47,241 --> 01:21:49,811 What the fuck is... 1724 01:21:53,113 --> 01:21:55,015 Earthquake! 1725 01:22:02,524 --> 01:22:05,225 <i>Hello, hello, hello,</i> <i>listeners.</i> 1726 01:22:05,259 --> 01:22:07,629 <i>Welcome back to</i> Marriage in the Middle Ages, 1727 01:22:07,662 --> 01:22:10,799 <i>where we talk about</i> <i>everything and anything to do</i> 1728 01:22:10,832 --> 01:22:12,232 <i>with marriage.</i> 1729 01:22:12,266 --> 01:22:15,603 <i>With me today</i> <i>is a very special guest.</i> 1730 01:22:15,637 --> 01:22:19,206 <i>You have heard me talk about</i> <i>him many, many times before</i> 1731 01:22:19,239 --> 01:22:22,811 <i>because he is my husband.</i> 1732 01:22:22,844 --> 01:22:25,814 <i>Please welcome Jack Langer.</i> 1733 01:22:25,847 --> 01:22:27,247 <i>Oh,</i> 1734 01:22:27,281 --> 01:22:29,450 <i>I didn't realize there'd be</i> <i>an applause track.</i> 1735 01:22:29,483 --> 01:22:31,586 <i>That's nice. I kinda want that</i> <i>every time I get introduced.</i> 1736 01:22:31,619 --> 01:22:33,420 - <i>All for you, baby.</i> <i>- Thank you.</i> 1737 01:22:33,454 --> 01:22:35,456 <i>Well, it's good to see you,</i> <i>my wife.</i> 1738 01:22:35,489 --> 01:22:37,958 <i>It's good to see you too,</i> 1739 01:22:37,991 --> 01:22:39,561 <i>my husband.</i> 1740 01:22:39,594 --> 01:22:41,395 <i>- Thank you.</i> <i>- Yes, long overdue.</i> 1741 01:22:41,428 --> 01:22:43,130 <i>Thank you</i> <i>for joining us.</i> 1742 01:22:43,163 --> 01:22:45,999 <i>Today is the day</i> <i>that we are going to tell</i> 1743 01:22:46,033 --> 01:22:49,002 <i>all the listeners</i> <i>all about...</i> 1744 01:22:49,036 --> 01:22:50,437 <i>Drumroll, please.</i> 1745 01:22:50,471 --> 01:22:53,440 <i>...our 40th birthday party.</i> 1746 01:22:53,474 --> 01:22:54,776 <i>Oy gevalt.</i> 1747 01:22:54,809 --> 01:22:56,243 <i>Yes, I... I'm not sure</i> 1748 01:22:56,276 --> 01:22:58,011 <i>I'm ready to relive this,</i> 1749 01:22:58,045 --> 01:23:00,013 <i>but I am here for you</i> 1750 01:23:00,047 --> 01:23:02,483 <i>and your wonderful listeners.</i> 1751 01:23:02,517 --> 01:23:04,519 <i>So, Jack,</i> 1752 01:23:04,552 --> 01:23:06,153 <i>you ready to dive in?</i> 1753 01:23:06,186 --> 01:23:08,355 <i>Yes, let's go.</i> 1754 01:26:42,937 --> 01:26:44,572 <i>Pew, pew, pew.</i> 1754 01:26:45,305 --> 01:27:45,865 Watch Online Movies and Series for FREE www.osdb.link/lm