"The Big Bang Theory" The 2003 Approximation

1 00:00:02,736 --> 00:00:06,004 What a wonderful day, thank you. 2 00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:07,605 Oh, we're glad you had fun. 3 00:00:07,607 --> 00:00:10,008 Blue Icees and a trip to The Container Store? 4 00:00:10,010 --> 00:00:12,777 It's like I died and went to the post-mortem, 5 00:00:12,779 --> 00:00:16,981 neuron-induced hallucination commonly mistaken as heaven. 6 00:00:16,983 --> 00:00:19,017 I still don't understand why you bought that pill caddie. 7 00:00:19,019 --> 00:00:20,451 You're a young man. 8 00:00:20,453 --> 00:00:22,787 Age is a state of mind, Leonard. 9 00:00:22,789 --> 00:00:24,756 In here I'm 90. 10 00:00:27,360 --> 00:00:30,194 Why are you taking your bins over there? 11 00:00:30,196 --> 00:00:31,863 That's just where I need them. 12 00:00:31,865 --> 00:00:33,731 You know, she doesn't have a lot of closet space. 13 00:00:33,733 --> 00:00:35,833 What's wrong with your closet? 14 00:00:35,835 --> 00:00:37,235 Uh... 15 00:00:37,237 --> 00:00:38,970 Well, honey, you know, 16 00:00:38,972 --> 00:00:40,671 now that Leonard and I are married, 17 00:00:40,673 --> 00:00:43,541 it kind of makes sense that we actually live together. 18 00:00:43,543 --> 00:00:45,376 So that's all this day was? 19 00:00:45,378 --> 00:00:48,146 A plan to butter me up before delivering bad news? 20 00:00:48,148 --> 00:00:50,048 Come on, buddy. No, I thought we were friends. 21 00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:52,483 You asked for a sip of my Icee. 22 00:00:52,485 --> 00:00:55,553 If you had your own straw, I might've said yes. 23 00:00:55,555 --> 00:00:58,990 Sheldon, please, we already feel bad about this. 24 00:00:58,992 --> 00:01:01,025 You know what they don't sell at The Container Store? 25 00:01:01,027 --> 00:01:03,594 Something large enough to contain my disappointment. 26 00:01:05,665 --> 00:01:06,864 Although, 27 00:01:06,866 --> 00:01:10,034 if anyone did, it would be them. 28 00:01:10,036 --> 00:01:13,538 ♪ Our whole universe was in a hot, dense state ♪ 29 00:01:13,540 --> 00:01:16,908 ♪ Then nearly 14 billion years ago expansion started... Wait! ♪ 30 00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:18,509 ♪ The Earth began to cool ♪ 31 00:01:18,511 --> 00:01:21,112 ♪ The autotrophs began to drool, Neanderthals developed tools ♪ 32 00:01:21,114 --> 00:01:23,748 ♪ We built the Wall ♪ ♪<i> We built the pyramids</i> ♪ 33 00:01:23,750 --> 00:01:26,384 ♪ Math, Science, History, unraveling the mystery ♪ 34 00:01:26,386 --> 00:01:28,252 ♪ That all started with a big bang ♪ 35 00:01:28,254 --> 00:01:30,121 ♪<i> Bang!</i> ♪ 36 00:01:35,962 --> 00:01:38,262 Thank you for letting me come speak with you. 37 00:01:38,264 --> 00:01:40,198 Of course. 38 00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:42,033 As my relationships with Penny and Amy 39 00:01:42,035 --> 00:01:44,202 are currently strained, I'm turning to you 40 00:01:44,204 --> 00:01:46,204 for female comfort and encouragement. 41 00:01:46,206 --> 00:01:47,638 Aww. 42 00:01:47,640 --> 00:01:49,640 I'm honored. I tried 43 00:01:49,642 --> 00:01:51,909 reaching out to my mother, but she was in Bible study. 44 00:01:51,911 --> 00:01:53,744 Leonard's mother is on a book tour. 45 00:01:53,746 --> 00:01:55,146 My Mee-Maw was taking a nap, 46 00:01:55,148 --> 00:01:58,116 and after a while Siri started repeating her answers. 47 00:01:58,985 --> 00:02:01,786 So, I'm your seventh choice. 48 00:02:01,788 --> 00:02:04,989 Yeah, I know, top ten, pretty exciting. 49 00:02:04,991 --> 00:02:07,558 How can I help you? 50 00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:09,260 Well, in addition to Amy leaving me, 51 00:02:09,262 --> 00:02:11,462 Leonard's moving in with Penny. 52 00:02:11,464 --> 00:02:14,432 It's difficult not to feel abandoned. 53 00:02:14,434 --> 00:02:17,802 Well, why don't you look at this as an opportunity? 54 00:02:17,804 --> 00:02:20,071 You had other roommates before Leonard. 55 00:02:20,073 --> 00:02:21,172 Maybe this is a chance 56 00:02:21,174 --> 00:02:22,807 to find someone new. 57 00:02:22,809 --> 00:02:25,109 Perhaps I could find someone better than Leonard. 58 00:02:25,111 --> 00:02:27,945 Someone I can rub in his face. 59 00:02:27,947 --> 00:02:30,181 Chris Pratt's all the rage right now. 60 00:02:31,184 --> 00:02:32,316 I wonder how he'd feel 61 00:02:32,318 --> 00:02:34,919 about taking the smaller bedroom. 62 00:02:34,921 --> 00:02:36,787 Hey. Hey. 63 00:02:36,789 --> 00:02:39,891 You know who would be the perfect roommate? 64 00:02:41,261 --> 00:02:44,195 Gandalf, but he's a smoker. 65 00:02:44,197 --> 00:02:46,197 Stuart. 66 00:02:46,199 --> 00:02:47,932 He's been living with us for a while now. 67 00:02:47,934 --> 00:02:49,800 I'm sure he'd love to get us out of his hair. 68 00:02:49,802 --> 00:02:52,170 Nope, couldn't be happier. 69 00:02:52,172 --> 00:02:54,005 Well, Sheldon's looking for a... 70 00:02:54,007 --> 00:02:57,108 Nope. 71 00:02:57,110 --> 00:02:59,243 He'll think about it. No I won't! 72 00:03:01,814 --> 00:03:03,314 Have you seen this Archie comic? 73 00:03:03,316 --> 00:03:06,317 It's actually <i> Archie versus Predator.</i> 74 00:03:06,319 --> 00:03:08,953 How could Archie defeat Predator? 75 00:03:08,955 --> 00:03:10,221 I don't know. 76 00:03:10,223 --> 00:03:12,356 Maybe Jughead's a Terminator. 77 00:03:13,726 --> 00:03:16,794 Hey. Hey, Stuart. 78 00:03:16,796 --> 00:03:18,563 Do you guys know any musicians? 79 00:03:18,565 --> 00:03:19,564 Why? 80 00:03:19,566 --> 00:03:21,132 I was thinking it might be cool 81 00:03:21,134 --> 00:03:23,568 to have live music here a few nights a week. 82 00:03:23,570 --> 00:03:25,002 You know, give this place more 83 00:03:25,004 --> 00:03:27,171 of a "staying in business" vibe. 84 00:03:27,173 --> 00:03:30,374 What kind of music are you thinking of? 85 00:03:30,376 --> 00:03:34,612 I like all kinds of music, but my favorite genre is free. 86 00:03:35,548 --> 00:03:36,714 Hey, we've always talked 87 00:03:36,716 --> 00:03:37,848 about playing together. 88 00:03:37,850 --> 00:03:39,183 Well, it could be fun 89 00:03:39,185 --> 00:03:40,184 to try a little acoustic thing. 90 00:03:40,186 --> 00:03:42,220 Oh, we could play "filk" music. 91 00:03:42,222 --> 00:03:43,754 What's that? 92 00:03:43,756 --> 00:03:45,156 It's been around for years. 93 00:03:45,158 --> 00:03:49,060 It's like folk music, but with a sci-fi/fantasy theme. 94 00:03:49,062 --> 00:03:50,261 I like it. 95 00:03:50,263 --> 00:03:51,329 It sounds exactly like something 96 00:03:51,331 --> 00:03:53,764 I shouldn't be expected to pay for. 97 00:03:53,766 --> 00:03:55,733 Dude, if we do this, 98 00:03:55,735 --> 00:03:57,568 we're gonna need a cool band name. 99 00:03:57,570 --> 00:03:59,437 You know, I've actually 100 00:03:59,439 --> 00:04:02,106 had one I've been sitting on for years. 101 00:04:02,108 --> 00:04:03,374 Really? 102 00:04:03,376 --> 00:04:04,575 It was for this power trio 103 00:04:04,577 --> 00:04:06,344 I tried to put together in junior high, 104 00:04:06,346 --> 00:04:09,046 but I was short two friends. 105 00:04:09,048 --> 00:04:10,514 What is it? 106 00:04:10,516 --> 00:04:13,351 Footprints on the Moon. 107 00:04:15,388 --> 00:04:18,456 I just got chills. 108 00:04:18,458 --> 00:04:20,258 So did I. 109 00:04:20,260 --> 00:04:21,692 Me, too. 110 00:04:21,694 --> 00:04:24,795 But I-I might have Lyme Disease. 111 00:04:27,400 --> 00:04:29,600 Just a few more signatures, and we'll be finished. 112 00:04:29,602 --> 00:04:32,970 Initial here to acknowledge that you've returned your key. 113 00:04:36,309 --> 00:04:38,109 Okay. 114 00:04:38,111 --> 00:04:40,111 As my future neighbor, 115 00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:42,780 I'd like you to have a key. 116 00:04:44,917 --> 00:04:47,818 Initial here to acknowledge you received it. 117 00:04:49,389 --> 00:04:51,656 I'm proud of you. You're taking this really well. 118 00:04:51,658 --> 00:04:53,591 Well, it's not like I'm never going to see you two again. 119 00:04:53,593 --> 00:04:56,961 Which brings us to article 23 subsection C-- 120 00:04:56,963 --> 00:04:59,297 please check here to reserve your spot 121 00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:02,767 at the ten year roommate reunion. 122 00:05:02,769 --> 00:05:05,069 Do I really have to do that now? 123 00:05:05,071 --> 00:05:06,237 No, but if you want chicken 124 00:05:06,239 --> 00:05:08,572 and get stuck with the fish, that's on you. 125 00:05:10,009 --> 00:05:11,275 All right. 126 00:05:11,277 --> 00:05:13,277 Oh, and lastly, 127 00:05:13,279 --> 00:05:15,146 please initial here to confirm 128 00:05:15,148 --> 00:05:16,480 that ownership of the living room couch 129 00:05:16,482 --> 00:05:17,815 is hereby transferred to me 130 00:05:17,817 --> 00:05:19,684 in perpetuity all throughout the universe 131 00:05:19,686 --> 00:05:21,619 and all alternate universes 132 00:05:21,621 --> 00:05:23,654 except for those universes where owning a couch 133 00:05:23,656 --> 00:05:25,323 is forbidden by the hive queen. 134 00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:27,525 In which case, all glory to the hive queen. 135 00:05:30,363 --> 00:05:32,296 All right, now all that's left 136 00:05:32,298 --> 00:05:34,932 is for us to sign and date the document, 137 00:05:34,934 --> 00:05:38,169 and we will officially no longer be roommates. 138 00:05:41,941 --> 00:05:43,307 What's the matter? 139 00:05:43,309 --> 00:05:45,276 It's harder than I thought. 140 00:05:45,278 --> 00:05:46,877 Let me help you. 141 00:05:46,879 --> 00:05:47,845 L-E-O-N... 142 00:05:47,847 --> 00:05:50,247 That helped. 143 00:05:51,384 --> 00:05:54,151 So I have an idea for a filk song. 144 00:05:54,153 --> 00:05:55,619 Kind of a, 145 00:05:55,621 --> 00:05:58,389 a power ballad, superhero crossover tale 146 00:05:58,391 --> 00:06:00,725 of epic proportions. 147 00:06:00,727 --> 00:06:02,626 Is it cold in here, 148 00:06:02,628 --> 00:06:05,396 'cause, oh, my. 149 00:06:06,499 --> 00:06:10,301 Okay, so it's a, it's a David and Goliath story. 150 00:06:10,303 --> 00:06:12,503 It's about man against God. 151 00:06:12,505 --> 00:06:15,339 It's called "Hammer and Whip: 152 00:06:15,341 --> 00:06:16,640 "The Untold Story 153 00:06:16,642 --> 00:06:20,444 of Thor versus Indiana Jones." 154 00:06:22,382 --> 00:06:24,548 Thor versus Indiana Jones? 155 00:06:24,550 --> 00:06:27,518 You just blew my filking mind. 156 00:06:27,520 --> 00:06:30,354 Okay, I don't have it all worked out yet, 157 00:06:30,356 --> 00:06:32,990 but I was thinking something like, um... 158 00:06:32,992 --> 00:06:35,326 ♪ Oh, Indy ♪ 159 00:06:35,328 --> 00:06:37,428 ♪ Oh, Indy ♪ 160 00:06:37,430 --> 00:06:41,399 ♪ The skies are so windy ♪ 161 00:06:42,869 --> 00:06:46,537 ♪ Is that a flying man with a killer bod? ♪ 162 00:06:46,539 --> 00:06:47,605 ♪ Wait ♪ 163 00:06:47,607 --> 00:06:48,873 ♪ That's no man ♪ 164 00:06:48,875 --> 00:06:52,009 ♪ It's a Norse god. ♪ 165 00:06:53,012 --> 00:06:55,346 Oh yes, definitely. 166 00:06:55,348 --> 00:06:57,548 Hang on. 167 00:06:57,550 --> 00:07:04,455 ♪ Thunder clapped as Thor raised his mighty hammer ♪ 168 00:07:04,457 --> 00:07:10,995 ♪ Indy rapped, "That's one bad mamma-jamma." ♪ 169 00:07:12,131 --> 00:07:13,431 That-that is so good! 170 00:07:13,433 --> 00:07:14,565 Right? 171 00:07:14,567 --> 00:07:16,634 Mamma-jamma just came to me. 172 00:07:17,937 --> 00:07:19,403 Okay, and here's the hook. 173 00:07:19,405 --> 00:07:22,640 ♪ Thor and Dr. Jones ♪ 174 00:07:22,642 --> 00:07:25,576 ♪ Thor and Dr. Jones ♪ 175 00:07:25,578 --> 00:07:27,111 ♪ One plays with lightning ♪ 176 00:07:27,113 --> 00:07:31,582 ♪ The other plays with bones ♪ 177 00:07:31,584 --> 00:07:34,151 ♪ Thor and Dr. Jones ♪ 178 00:07:34,153 --> 00:07:37,087 ♪ Thor and Dr. Jones ♪ 179 00:07:37,089 --> 00:07:38,789 ♪ One plays with lightning ♪ 180 00:07:38,791 --> 00:07:41,525 ♪ The other plays with bones. ♪ 181 00:07:44,931 --> 00:07:46,464 Oh, man, that rocks. 182 00:07:46,466 --> 00:07:48,499 Hey, remember <i> The Ark of the Covenant?</i> 183 00:07:48,501 --> 00:07:51,735 Yeah? That's how much we're gonna melt people's faces off. 184 00:07:54,407 --> 00:07:57,174 I appreciate your interest in the apartment. 185 00:07:57,176 --> 00:07:59,477 I just need to ask you a few standard questions. 186 00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:01,412 Sure. It says here you're a chemist. 187 00:08:01,414 --> 00:08:04,515 Which element on the periodic table 188 00:08:04,517 --> 00:08:08,319 do you feel is too big for its britches? 189 00:08:09,622 --> 00:08:11,655 Is that supposed to be a joke? 190 00:08:11,657 --> 00:08:14,425 Looks like argon's not the only one 191 00:08:14,427 --> 00:08:16,961 with an attitude problem. 192 00:08:16,963 --> 00:08:18,462 In general, 193 00:08:18,464 --> 00:08:20,998 would you say that you smell better, worse 194 00:08:21,000 --> 00:08:24,535 or the same as you do right now? 195 00:08:26,305 --> 00:08:27,471 I was going to ask you 196 00:08:27,473 --> 00:08:29,440 what is the best fruit, 197 00:08:29,442 --> 00:08:31,275 but then I realized what I want to ask you 198 00:08:31,277 --> 00:08:33,477 is why is there a Band-Aid on your forearm, 199 00:08:33,479 --> 00:08:34,445 but then I realized what 200 00:08:34,447 --> 00:08:35,880 I really want to ask you is 201 00:08:35,882 --> 00:08:37,715 just can you just go? 202 00:08:39,485 --> 00:08:41,185 You're healthy. 203 00:08:41,187 --> 00:08:42,987 You have a job in the sciences. 204 00:08:42,989 --> 00:08:45,623 I've got to say, if this credit report comes back good, 205 00:08:45,625 --> 00:08:46,924 you're the frontrunner. 206 00:08:51,664 --> 00:08:53,531 I'm not gonna be your roommate, Sheldon. 207 00:08:53,533 --> 00:08:56,300 But I met with 11 people, 208 00:08:56,302 --> 00:08:57,701 and they all walked out. 209 00:08:57,703 --> 00:08:59,570 And that Hollywood phony Chris Pratt 210 00:08:59,572 --> 00:09:01,472 never tweeted me back. 211 00:09:01,474 --> 00:09:04,208 I'm sure you'll find somebody else. 212 00:09:04,210 --> 00:09:06,010 I suppose. 213 00:09:06,012 --> 00:09:07,478 What happened to me, Amy? 214 00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:08,512 Years ago I was 215 00:09:08,514 --> 00:09:10,814 completely disengaged from my feelings. 216 00:09:10,816 --> 00:09:12,650 I'd say it was a happier time, 217 00:09:12,652 --> 00:09:16,487 but I was disengaged from my feelings, so who can tell? 218 00:09:16,489 --> 00:09:18,756 I don't know how to help you. 219 00:09:18,758 --> 00:09:20,991 You know, feelings are a part of life. 220 00:09:20,993 --> 00:09:22,560 They didn't used to be. 221 00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:24,562 You and Leonard and Penny, 222 00:09:24,564 --> 00:09:26,597 you all poisoned me with emotions. 223 00:09:26,599 --> 00:09:28,599 I was like the Tin Man, perfectly content 224 00:09:28,601 --> 00:09:30,768 until that evil Wizard gave him a heart. 225 00:09:33,039 --> 00:09:36,240 I don't think that was the point of the movie. 226 00:09:36,242 --> 00:09:37,708 Fine, then I was like Pinocchio 227 00:09:37,710 --> 00:09:41,378 before that jerk Geppetto went and made him a real boy. 228 00:09:41,380 --> 00:09:43,447 There you go. 229 00:09:45,618 --> 00:09:47,418 So, what are you thinking for dinner? 230 00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:48,586 Well, it's Thai food night. 231 00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:49,520 Well, honey, 232 00:09:49,522 --> 00:09:50,854 you don't live with Sheldon anymore. 233 00:09:50,856 --> 00:09:52,590 You can have anything you want. 234 00:09:52,592 --> 00:09:54,792 You're right. 235 00:09:54,794 --> 00:09:56,093 But what? 236 00:09:57,196 --> 00:09:58,262 Mexican? 237 00:09:58,264 --> 00:09:59,530 Italian? German? 238 00:09:59,532 --> 00:10:00,931 Indian? Greek? 239 00:10:00,933 --> 00:10:02,232 Cuban? Chinese? 240 00:10:02,234 --> 00:10:03,233 Pizza? Barbecue? 241 00:10:03,235 --> 00:10:06,036 Korean? Korean barbecue? 242 00:10:06,973 --> 00:10:08,205 How about Thai food? 243 00:10:08,207 --> 00:10:09,840 Oh, thank God 244 00:10:12,979 --> 00:10:15,312 Hey, we're going to dinner. You want to come? 245 00:10:15,314 --> 00:10:16,914 Oh, I wish I could, 246 00:10:16,916 --> 00:10:20,150 but I realized I've become too emotionally vulnerable, 247 00:10:20,152 --> 00:10:22,219 so, like an operating system, 248 00:10:22,221 --> 00:10:25,389 I'm restoring my life to the last stable version, 249 00:10:25,391 --> 00:10:28,525 which was in 2003, the day before I met Leonard. 250 00:10:30,062 --> 00:10:31,795 You heard him, no. 251 00:10:31,797 --> 00:10:33,130 Hang on. 252 00:10:33,132 --> 00:10:35,566 Wait, you actually think it's 2003? 253 00:10:35,568 --> 00:10:37,468 No, just because I'm living my life 254 00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:39,837 like it was 12 years ago doesn't mean I'm delusional. 255 00:10:39,839 --> 00:10:41,739 And since it is 2003, 256 00:10:41,741 --> 00:10:43,507 I don't know who you are, 257 00:10:43,509 --> 00:10:45,476 so please exit the premises 258 00:10:45,478 --> 00:10:47,811 before I call the police on my stylish new flip phone. 259 00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:55,074 260 00:10:59,692 --> 00:11:01,625 Are you doing okay? 261 00:11:01,627 --> 00:11:03,027 I guess. 262 00:11:03,029 --> 00:11:05,329 I'm just, you know, worried about Sheldon. 263 00:11:05,331 --> 00:11:07,131 Well, come on, he's a grown man in his 30s 264 00:11:07,133 --> 00:11:08,599 pretending to be a grown man in his 20s. 265 00:11:08,601 --> 00:11:09,733 He's fine. 266 00:11:10,670 --> 00:11:13,203 I hope so. 267 00:11:13,205 --> 00:11:15,272 What else can you do? Move back in with him? 268 00:11:15,274 --> 00:11:16,807 No, of course not. I-I just feel bad. 269 00:11:16,809 --> 00:11:17,808 Well, so do I, 270 00:11:17,810 --> 00:11:20,210 but don't you want to live with your wife 271 00:11:20,212 --> 00:11:21,645 and set the thermostat 272 00:11:21,647 --> 00:11:22,780 to whatever you want 273 00:11:22,782 --> 00:11:24,448 and have your body tell you 274 00:11:24,450 --> 00:11:25,983 when it's time to go to the bathroom, 275 00:11:25,985 --> 00:11:27,151 you know, not a schedule slipped 276 00:11:27,153 --> 00:11:29,787 underneath your door every morning? 277 00:11:29,789 --> 00:11:32,856 I did like that he had the weather on it. 278 00:11:33,393 --> 00:11:35,493 Trust me, this is the right thing. 279 00:11:35,495 --> 00:11:36,828 I know. 280 00:11:36,830 --> 00:11:38,296 And it's not like we're abandoning him. 281 00:11:38,298 --> 00:11:39,631 Plus, 282 00:11:39,633 --> 00:11:41,800 we can FaceTime him whenever we want, 283 00:11:41,802 --> 00:11:45,704 you know, once iPhones are invented in his universe. 284 00:11:48,975 --> 00:11:51,843 I can't believe Sheldon 285 00:11:51,845 --> 00:11:53,011 asked you to be his roommate. 286 00:11:53,013 --> 00:11:56,681 I can't believe he ran my credit. 287 00:11:56,683 --> 00:11:59,250 Hey, if you're open to living with someone great, 288 00:11:59,252 --> 00:12:01,653 I'll give you $1,000 to take Stuart. 289 00:12:03,656 --> 00:12:05,223 You really should've gone on the Internet 290 00:12:05,225 --> 00:12:06,691 and checked how long that kind of thing lives 291 00:12:06,693 --> 00:12:08,493 before you got one. 292 00:12:09,895 --> 00:12:11,228 I'm sorry. 293 00:12:11,230 --> 00:12:12,562 I just thought you might have 294 00:12:12,564 --> 00:12:14,799 a pasty, weirdo-shaped hole in your life. 295 00:12:15,001 --> 00:12:17,468 Hey, I know Sheldon's quirky, 296 00:12:17,470 --> 00:12:19,036 but he's also brilliant and insightful. 297 00:12:20,540 --> 00:12:23,140 I think calling him a weirdo is a little unfair. 298 00:12:23,342 --> 00:12:25,609 Hello, 2003! 299 00:12:28,414 --> 00:12:30,481 Hey, we brought you Thai. 300 00:12:32,585 --> 00:12:33,784 Where is everything? 301 00:12:33,786 --> 00:12:35,686 In my present, it's in the future. 302 00:12:35,688 --> 00:12:38,522 In your present, it's been crammed in the bedroom 303 00:12:38,524 --> 00:12:39,857 by an enterprising young man 304 00:12:39,859 --> 00:12:42,793 I met in The Home Depot parking lot. 305 00:12:43,729 --> 00:12:45,395 I know what you're doing. 306 00:12:45,397 --> 00:12:47,431 You're trying to get attention so we'll feel bad for you, 307 00:12:47,433 --> 00:12:48,799 but it's not happening. 308 00:12:48,801 --> 00:12:50,734 No, what I'm doing is trying to figure out 309 00:12:50,736 --> 00:12:53,437 how to live my life now that everyone is leaving me. 310 00:12:53,439 --> 00:12:55,873 Will you knock it off? We're across the hall. 311 00:12:55,875 --> 00:12:58,509 As the kids are saying today, "talk to the hand." 312 00:12:59,879 --> 00:13:01,979 They're not saying that. 313 00:13:01,981 --> 00:13:04,982 They are in 2003. 314 00:13:04,984 --> 00:13:07,718 No, they're really not. 315 00:13:10,556 --> 00:13:13,323 ♪ Thor and Dr. Jones ♪ 316 00:13:13,325 --> 00:13:15,826 ♪ Thor and Dr. Jones ♪ 317 00:13:15,828 --> 00:13:17,461 ♪ One runs from Loki ♪ 318 00:13:17,463 --> 00:13:20,898 ♪ The other runs from stones. ♪ 319 00:13:21,834 --> 00:13:23,934 So, what do you think? 320 00:13:23,936 --> 00:13:26,136 Wow. 321 00:13:26,138 --> 00:13:29,072 Runs from stones means that-that big boulder, 322 00:13:29,074 --> 00:13:31,341 but I couldn't rhyme anything with boulder. 323 00:13:31,343 --> 00:13:33,911 Colder, shoulder, 324 00:13:33,913 --> 00:13:35,245 soldier, folder... 325 00:13:35,247 --> 00:13:36,914 Right, yeah, right. 326 00:13:36,916 --> 00:13:38,582 But... 327 00:13:38,584 --> 00:13:40,284 what do you think? 328 00:13:40,286 --> 00:13:42,085 I think it's very cute. 329 00:13:42,087 --> 00:13:43,754 Cute? It's not cute. 330 00:13:43,756 --> 00:13:46,824 Cute is children dressed as vegetables. 331 00:13:48,961 --> 00:13:51,528 Okay, fine, it's not cute. 332 00:13:51,530 --> 00:13:52,930 Just be honest. You don't like it. 333 00:13:52,932 --> 00:13:54,298 I didn't say that. 334 00:13:54,300 --> 00:13:56,767 I-I just like music you can dance to. 335 00:13:56,769 --> 00:13:58,635 You can dance to this! 336 00:13:58,637 --> 00:14:00,537 Um, uh, uh... 337 00:14:00,539 --> 00:14:03,373 ♪ Thor and Dr. Jones ♪ 338 00:14:03,375 --> 00:14:05,843 ♪ Thor and Dr. Jones ♪ 339 00:14:05,845 --> 00:14:07,044 ♪ One plays with lightning ♪ 340 00:14:07,046 --> 00:14:09,713 ♪ The other plays with bones. ♪ 341 00:14:11,817 --> 00:14:14,051 I'm telling you, dude, the song has no groove. 342 00:14:14,053 --> 00:14:16,153 You can't dance to it. 343 00:14:16,155 --> 00:14:17,988 Who cares? 344 00:14:17,990 --> 00:14:19,790 I thought the whole point of Footprints on the Moon 345 00:14:19,792 --> 00:14:22,159 was to write songs that make people think. 346 00:14:22,161 --> 00:14:23,627 You can do both, 347 00:14:23,629 --> 00:14:25,996 like Michael Jackson's "Billie Jean." 348 00:14:25,998 --> 00:14:27,364 While you're dancing you're thinking, like, 349 00:14:27,366 --> 00:14:29,900 "Darn it, whose baby is it?" 350 00:14:31,571 --> 00:14:33,004 Where's this coming from? 351 00:14:33,006 --> 00:14:35,506 A few hours ago, we both loved this song. 352 00:14:35,508 --> 00:14:36,908 I still love it. 353 00:14:36,910 --> 00:14:38,877 I just think there's room for improvement. 354 00:14:38,879 --> 00:14:41,512 You played it for Emily, didn't you? 355 00:14:41,514 --> 00:14:43,047 Yeah, so what? You are such a wimp. 356 00:14:43,049 --> 00:14:45,850 She didn't like it, now you don't like it. 357 00:14:45,852 --> 00:14:48,820 No, no. I'm just evolving as a musician. 358 00:14:48,822 --> 00:14:51,422 You're the one who's stuck in the past. 359 00:14:51,424 --> 00:14:53,958 The past was lunch! 360 00:14:56,096 --> 00:14:57,996 You know what's really happening here? 361 00:14:57,998 --> 00:15:00,899 Your girlfriend is breaking up our band. 362 00:15:02,335 --> 00:15:03,735 She has nothing to do with this. 363 00:15:03,737 --> 00:15:04,903 I am my own man. 364 00:15:04,905 --> 00:15:06,404 Oh, please. Your brain belongs 365 00:15:06,406 --> 00:15:08,706 to whoever's willing to sleep with you. 366 00:15:08,708 --> 00:15:10,041 That is so not true. Really? 367 00:15:10,043 --> 00:15:11,342 Remember when you were gonna get circumcised 368 00:15:11,344 --> 00:15:13,578 for Rachel Bernstein? 369 00:15:13,580 --> 00:15:15,914 That had nothing to do with Rachel. 370 00:15:15,916 --> 00:15:18,950 It was an overreaction to a bad zipper injury. 371 00:15:22,022 --> 00:15:23,254 I don't need this. 372 00:15:23,256 --> 00:15:25,423 I'm quitting the band! 373 00:15:25,425 --> 00:15:26,791 Fine, I quit, too! 374 00:15:26,793 --> 00:15:28,126 Then get out of my house! 375 00:15:28,128 --> 00:15:30,194 With pleasure! 376 00:15:38,138 --> 00:15:39,203 Raj, wait. 377 00:15:39,205 --> 00:15:41,272 What took you so long? 378 00:15:43,977 --> 00:15:45,076 Buddy, I know me 379 00:15:45,078 --> 00:15:47,211 moving in with Penny feels like a big change, 380 00:15:47,213 --> 00:15:48,613 but it's not. 381 00:15:48,615 --> 00:15:49,814 How can you say that? 382 00:15:49,816 --> 00:15:50,882 Amy's gone, 383 00:15:50,884 --> 00:15:52,283 and you two are married now, 384 00:15:52,285 --> 00:15:54,953 so it's only a matter of time before you're gone, too. 385 00:15:54,955 --> 00:15:56,654 Okay, you don't know what's gonna happen. 386 00:15:56,656 --> 00:15:57,822 No, I do. 387 00:15:57,824 --> 00:15:59,324 Eventually you'll want more space, 388 00:15:59,326 --> 00:16:00,925 and you'll move into a house, 389 00:16:00,927 --> 00:16:03,061 and then instead of dinner a couple of times a week, 390 00:16:03,063 --> 00:16:04,429 it'll only be a couple of times a month, 391 00:16:04,431 --> 00:16:05,763 and then it'll only be 392 00:16:05,765 --> 00:16:06,965 on special occasions, 393 00:16:06,967 --> 00:16:10,134 like when Bernadette divorces Wolowitz. 394 00:16:11,071 --> 00:16:12,971 Or-or-or like 395 00:16:12,973 --> 00:16:14,505 when Koothrappali's weird girlfriend 396 00:16:14,507 --> 00:16:16,908 admits where she buried his body. 397 00:16:18,678 --> 00:16:20,011 Or Amy's wedding, 398 00:16:20,013 --> 00:16:22,580 where she's marrying someone better than me. 399 00:16:22,582 --> 00:16:24,916 Okay, look, 400 00:16:24,918 --> 00:16:27,085 we don't need to rush into anything. 401 00:16:27,087 --> 00:16:28,486 All right? 402 00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:30,989 Maybe instead of Leonard moving in with me, 403 00:16:30,991 --> 00:16:33,992 we just leave things the way they are, 404 00:16:33,994 --> 00:16:35,159 and... 405 00:16:35,161 --> 00:16:36,828 sometimes we'll sleep over there, 406 00:16:36,830 --> 00:16:39,130 and sometimes we'll sleep over here. 407 00:16:39,132 --> 00:16:41,833 But mostly here. 408 00:16:42,936 --> 00:16:44,535 Sure. 409 00:16:44,537 --> 00:16:46,471 W-W-What about what you said in the restaurant? 410 00:16:46,473 --> 00:16:47,472 Well, it's not forever. 411 00:16:47,474 --> 00:16:49,107 It's just for a while. 412 00:16:49,109 --> 00:16:52,510 If you want, we can think of him like he's our dog. 413 00:16:52,512 --> 00:16:54,545 You can. 414 00:16:55,348 --> 00:16:57,115 I'm happy when you come home. 415 00:16:58,218 --> 00:17:00,284 And I'm scared of fireworks. 416 00:17:00,286 --> 00:17:03,988 And by the way, on July Fourth, we're all sleeping here. 417 00:17:03,990 --> 00:17:06,057 Fine. 418 00:17:06,059 --> 00:17:07,191 All right, great! 419 00:17:07,193 --> 00:17:08,459 Just give me one minute, 420 00:17:08,461 --> 00:17:10,661 and I'll get started on a new Roommate Agreement. 421 00:17:10,663 --> 00:17:11,796 Yeah. 422 00:17:11,798 --> 00:17:13,064 Nothing from Pratt. We're good. 423 00:17:20,473 --> 00:17:23,007 ♪ Indy' whip snapped ♪ 424 00:17:23,009 --> 00:17:25,410 ♪ Thor's hammer missed ♪ 425 00:17:25,412 --> 00:17:28,246 ♪ It was Avenger ♪ 426 00:17:28,248 --> 00:17:31,416 ♪ Versus archeologist ♪ 427 00:17:32,252 --> 00:17:34,252 ♪ Indy held his ground ♪ 428 00:17:34,254 --> 00:17:37,422 ♪ And straightened his fedora ♪ 429 00:17:37,424 --> 00:17:39,924 ♪ Thor said, "That's a nice look ♪ 430 00:17:39,926 --> 00:17:43,261 ♪ In 1944-a" ♪ 431 00:17:46,666 --> 00:17:49,200 ♪ Thor and Dr. Jones ♪ 432 00:17:49,202 --> 00:17:51,769 ♪ Thor and Dr. Jones ♪ 433 00:17:51,771 --> 00:17:53,704 ♪ One plays with lightning ♪ 434 00:17:53,706 --> 00:17:56,774 ♪ The other plays bones ♪ 435 00:17:58,378 --> 00:18:00,044 ♪ Thor and Dr. Jones ♪ 436 00:18:00,046 --> 00:18:01,212 ♪ Thor and Dr. Jones ♪ 437 00:18:01,214 --> 00:18:03,114 ♪ Thor and Dr. Jones ♪ 438 00:18:03,116 --> 00:18:05,416 ♪ One plays with lightning ♪ 439 00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:09,921 ♪ The other plays bones. ♪ 440 00:18:11,191 --> 00:18:13,091 Play something we can dance to. 440 00:18:14,305 --> 00:19:14,192