"Minder" What Makes Shamy Run?

1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Watch Online Movies and Series for FREE www.osdb.link/lm 2 00:00:50,650 --> 00:00:52,790 I could be so good for you. 3 00:00:54,956 --> 00:00:56,889 Love you like you want me to. 4 00:01:03,170 --> 00:01:05,250 I could be so good for you. 5 00:01:07,350 --> 00:01:10,493 Love you like you want me to. 6 00:02:15,370 --> 00:02:16,370 Morning, Governor. 7 00:02:17,630 --> 00:02:18,630 Shammy about? 8 00:02:19,710 --> 00:02:20,710 No. 9 00:02:21,010 --> 00:02:22,010 Is he coming back? 10 00:02:23,090 --> 00:02:24,090 Don't know. 11 00:02:24,250 --> 00:02:25,250 This is very nice. 12 00:02:25,975 --> 00:02:27,210 I'm Mr Daly. 13 00:02:28,150 --> 00:02:28,730 Yes. 14 00:02:29,070 --> 00:02:30,230 I've got to meet with Shammy. 15 00:02:31,110 --> 00:02:32,110 Yes. 16 00:02:32,420 --> 00:02:33,420 Well, where is he? 17 00:02:34,590 --> 00:02:35,590 Not here. 18 00:02:35,710 --> 00:02:36,790 I gathered that. 19 00:02:37,070 --> 00:02:38,070 Let's start again. 20 00:02:38,670 --> 00:02:40,450 Me got meet with Shammy. 21 00:02:41,210 --> 00:02:42,210 Where Shammy? 22 00:02:42,990 --> 00:02:43,990 Shammy running. 23 00:02:44,550 --> 00:02:44,990 Running? 24 00:02:45,210 --> 00:02:47,050 I know he's a bit slippery, but where? 25 00:02:47,470 --> 00:02:47,790 Bank? 26 00:02:47,930 --> 00:02:48,370 Betting shop? 27 00:02:48,470 --> 00:02:48,770 Boozer? 28 00:02:48,970 --> 00:02:49,970 Home? 29 00:03:01,490 --> 00:03:02,490 There. 30 00:03:02,750 --> 00:03:03,390 Cup of tea? 31 00:03:03,610 --> 00:03:03,850 Tea. 32 00:03:04,150 --> 00:03:04,790 Thank you kindly. 33 00:03:04,910 --> 00:03:05,530 Don't you get cold. 34 00:03:05,670 --> 00:03:07,430 Go on, you get back to the old Jack and Jill. 35 00:03:19,270 --> 00:03:20,270 Shammy. 36 00:03:20,710 --> 00:03:21,150 Arthur! 37 00:03:21,690 --> 00:03:22,690 Nice to see you. 38 00:03:22,830 --> 00:03:23,390 Cup of tea? 39 00:03:23,391 --> 00:03:23,770 Yes. 40 00:03:24,260 --> 00:03:26,030 Roger, a cup of tea for Mr Daly, please. 41 00:03:26,210 --> 00:03:27,570 The old man said you were running. 42 00:03:27,710 --> 00:03:29,230 Well, you know how it is, Arthur. 43 00:03:29,330 --> 00:03:30,330 Busy, busy. 44 00:03:30,450 --> 00:03:31,450 Is that your shop? 45 00:03:32,390 --> 00:03:33,390 Yes, sort of. 46 00:03:33,990 --> 00:03:35,730 The old fella, he's a bit of a peasant. 47 00:03:36,170 --> 00:03:36,850 Shrewd, mind you. 48 00:03:37,050 --> 00:03:38,890 Probably be a millionaire in a couple of years. 49 00:03:39,190 --> 00:03:40,350 Yes, talking to millionaires. 50 00:03:40,550 --> 00:03:41,810 I know what you mean, Arthur. 51 00:03:41,890 --> 00:03:42,110 Good. 52 00:03:42,330 --> 00:03:42,790 I've got it. 53 00:03:42,950 --> 00:03:43,950 I've got it. 54 00:03:46,270 --> 00:03:46,910 Monthly, right? 55 00:03:47,150 --> 00:03:48,150 Right. 56 00:03:50,670 --> 00:03:51,890 You did me a right favour. 57 00:03:51,891 --> 00:03:54,770 Those reconditioned sewing machines turned out to be a winner. 58 00:03:55,370 --> 00:03:56,490 The old value, Shammy. 59 00:03:57,180 --> 00:03:59,461 They're not interested in homemade frocks in this country. 60 00:03:59,750 --> 00:04:02,070 Our young marrieds, all they want is coffee mornings and... 61 00:04:02,650 --> 00:04:04,010 can't even die on a sock. 62 00:04:05,190 --> 00:04:07,450 The old womenfolk have got their priorities right. 63 00:04:08,250 --> 00:04:09,810 I couldn't have shitted them in Fulham. 64 00:04:10,410 --> 00:04:11,766 How is your good lady, by the way? 65 00:04:11,790 --> 00:04:12,790 She's fine. 66 00:04:13,040 --> 00:04:14,040 Bit of trouble, though. 67 00:04:14,110 --> 00:04:15,270 Lost her job at the casino. 68 00:04:15,670 --> 00:04:17,726 Yeah, but now you're doing so well, she won't leave one, will she? 69 00:04:17,750 --> 00:04:18,810 I don't know about that, Arthur. 70 00:04:18,811 --> 00:04:20,090 Come on, don't be modest. 71 00:04:20,091 --> 00:04:21,550 I've known you a few years. 72 00:04:22,110 --> 00:04:23,130 What can I say about you? 73 00:04:23,750 --> 00:04:24,750 Near do well. 74 00:04:25,590 --> 00:04:26,590 Shall I go a bit further? 75 00:04:26,770 --> 00:04:27,930 Drunkard, gambler, cheat. 76 00:04:28,550 --> 00:04:29,670 Tendency to tell porties. 77 00:04:30,170 --> 00:04:32,130 All in all, you're an out-and-out villain, Shammy. 78 00:04:32,330 --> 00:04:33,666 Nobody's perfect, are they, Arthur? 79 00:04:33,690 --> 00:04:34,890 You're all right here, though. 80 00:04:35,530 --> 00:04:37,030 Because you are with your own folk. 81 00:04:37,250 --> 00:04:38,250 You are at home. 82 00:04:38,470 --> 00:04:39,470 I'm just a Londoner. 83 00:04:39,550 --> 00:04:40,550 You may think that. 84 00:04:40,770 --> 00:04:43,610 All that dashing around up the West End to find a lady, that wasn't you. 85 00:04:43,920 --> 00:04:44,986 Look, the reason I moved. 86 00:04:45,010 --> 00:04:46,730 I was getting so much hag from the old Bill. 87 00:04:47,030 --> 00:04:48,350 And I was mugged three times. 88 00:04:48,351 --> 00:04:49,471 Well, you're all right here. 89 00:04:49,900 --> 00:04:52,341 It seems as if they know how to make a decent cup of tea, too. 90 00:04:53,790 --> 00:04:54,790 I'm proud of you, Shammy. 91 00:04:56,150 --> 00:04:59,170 You have got a worldview, imagination. 92 00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:01,610 It's ambition, I suppose. 93 00:05:02,190 --> 00:05:03,430 That's a lovely beer. 94 00:05:04,130 --> 00:05:05,130 Here you go. 95 00:05:10,230 --> 00:05:11,230 He's a lucky boy. 96 00:05:11,690 --> 00:05:12,690 Pure skill, that is. 97 00:05:13,030 --> 00:05:14,070 Dear, hello, sir. 98 00:05:14,410 --> 00:05:15,690 Is that Arthur's winnings? 99 00:05:15,730 --> 00:05:17,130 No, that's Terry's winnings, son. 100 00:05:17,131 --> 00:05:18,131 Andy. 101 00:05:18,300 --> 00:05:19,470 It's my first Yankee ever. 102 00:05:19,630 --> 00:05:20,950 Yeah, I've done hundreds of them. 103 00:05:21,190 --> 00:05:22,130 I've done hundreds of them. 104 00:05:22,170 --> 00:05:23,810 It's the first time I've ever won, though. 105 00:05:23,890 --> 00:05:24,890 I'm skint, skint. 106 00:05:25,030 --> 00:05:25,270 Don't tell. 107 00:05:25,710 --> 00:05:27,991 You wouldn't like to sub me some money, would you, my boy? 108 00:05:28,610 --> 00:05:29,610 What's happening to me? 109 00:05:30,130 --> 00:05:31,130 Nothing. 110 00:05:32,730 --> 00:05:33,730 Yeah, go on, son. 111 00:05:34,030 --> 00:05:34,530 It's me, isn't it? 112 00:05:34,930 --> 00:05:35,930 It's all right. 113 00:05:36,050 --> 00:05:37,250 I want to get some things. 114 00:05:37,870 --> 00:05:41,170 Bread and butter and sweets for my little girl. 115 00:05:41,420 --> 00:05:42,450 Show that load. 116 00:05:43,950 --> 00:05:45,410 Seven to one per nine. 117 00:05:46,450 --> 00:05:47,670 Hold on, hold on. 118 00:05:49,400 --> 00:05:50,870 Your little girl is 29. 119 00:05:51,830 --> 00:05:53,150 Well, she still likes sweets. 120 00:05:54,370 --> 00:05:55,990 It's five to two to two. 121 00:05:59,210 --> 00:06:00,210 Sorry I'm late. 122 00:06:00,410 --> 00:06:00,850 You go. 123 00:06:01,230 --> 00:06:02,230 Son. 124 00:06:02,420 --> 00:06:03,420 Go, go. 125 00:06:03,530 --> 00:06:04,050 Why? 126 00:06:04,150 --> 00:06:05,430 I mean, I just had a cup of tea. 127 00:06:05,500 --> 00:06:07,501 Mr. This, I have dispatched with your services. 128 00:06:07,730 --> 00:06:08,030 Yeah? 129 00:06:08,090 --> 00:06:09,090 And who are you? 130 00:06:11,490 --> 00:06:12,670 I own this shop. 131 00:06:13,400 --> 00:06:14,890 And you are too expensive. 132 00:06:15,440 --> 00:06:17,121 You want to be a partner, not an employee. 133 00:06:17,390 --> 00:06:18,690 Thief, bloody thief. 134 00:06:19,430 --> 00:06:20,490 He's a nutter anyway. 135 00:06:21,255 --> 00:06:22,536 You've been tipping in the till. 136 00:06:23,050 --> 00:06:24,050 No chance. 137 00:06:24,440 --> 00:06:26,170 He keeps the keys in his bleeding pocket. 138 00:06:27,470 --> 00:06:28,970 I've been really good to you. 139 00:06:29,470 --> 00:06:30,030 And you. 140 00:06:30,330 --> 00:06:31,670 Bought you lots of customers. 141 00:06:32,340 --> 00:06:33,781 There are still many things missing. 142 00:06:34,530 --> 00:06:35,530 Shoplifters. 143 00:06:35,810 --> 00:06:36,410 Yes. 144 00:06:36,570 --> 00:06:37,570 Yeah. 145 00:06:37,690 --> 00:06:38,851 And they're all your friends. 146 00:06:39,980 --> 00:06:41,470 You suggested he accepted cheques. 147 00:06:41,950 --> 00:06:42,170 Yeah. 148 00:06:42,570 --> 00:06:43,570 Everyone bounced. 149 00:06:44,330 --> 00:06:47,910 You took deposits on, what was it, two TV sets and a music center? 150 00:06:48,190 --> 00:06:48,530 Yeah. 151 00:06:48,935 --> 00:06:50,170 Every address is false. 152 00:06:50,550 --> 00:06:52,126 Yeah, well, it could happen in any shop. 153 00:06:52,150 --> 00:06:53,610 Fifteen videotapes are missing. 154 00:06:54,050 --> 00:06:56,011 Yeah, well, he doesn't organize anything, does he? 155 00:06:56,650 --> 00:06:57,730 Anyway, he's a crook. 156 00:06:58,405 --> 00:07:01,290 I know what you're up to, ferrying videos to Bombay. 157 00:07:02,480 --> 00:07:04,830 So when he goes to Bombay, you help yourself. 158 00:07:06,280 --> 00:07:07,280 You've been very foolish. 159 00:07:07,870 --> 00:07:09,350 I was grooming you for higher things. 160 00:07:09,470 --> 00:07:13,710 I had you checked out, but... as Ajit says... 161 00:07:14,310 --> 00:07:15,710 you're nothing but a thief. 162 00:07:18,975 --> 00:07:19,975 Well, get me things then. 163 00:07:20,270 --> 00:07:20,810 Go! 164 00:07:21,190 --> 00:07:21,690 Go! 165 00:07:21,880 --> 00:07:22,880 Take it easy. 166 00:07:24,500 --> 00:07:25,500 You're a peasant. 167 00:07:26,080 --> 00:07:27,190 Just like the rest of them. 168 00:07:28,560 --> 00:07:30,590 You might have a second ankle, Tina. 169 00:07:31,240 --> 00:07:33,510 But your brain's back with a bullet cart. 170 00:07:36,905 --> 00:07:38,250 Your Indian likes the graft. 171 00:07:38,750 --> 00:07:41,630 Up at the crack of dawn, open his paper shop, get the kids off to school. 172 00:07:41,730 --> 00:07:42,826 I mean, I was up at Brick Lane. 173 00:07:42,850 --> 00:07:43,670 You should see that place. 174 00:07:43,730 --> 00:07:44,730 It's thriving. 175 00:07:44,830 --> 00:07:47,866 I saw only one white face while I was there, and I think that was Lord Attenborough. 176 00:07:47,890 --> 00:07:48,670 Have one yourself, Dave. 177 00:07:48,770 --> 00:07:49,770 Charred. 178 00:07:50,810 --> 00:07:51,810 Sir. 179 00:07:52,180 --> 00:07:55,330 I seen an Indian playing the bagpipes years ago. 180 00:07:56,230 --> 00:07:57,230 And? 181 00:07:57,370 --> 00:07:58,691 You wouldn't think they'd bother. 182 00:07:58,990 --> 00:07:59,990 Give the syrup one, Dave. 183 00:08:01,080 --> 00:08:03,070 Hey, Dave, your friend and mine, old Shammy. 184 00:08:03,270 --> 00:08:05,806 Even he's got the flavour of hard work, dashing about like a good'un. 185 00:08:05,830 --> 00:08:06,910 Yeah, I don't believe that. 186 00:08:07,370 --> 00:08:07,650 Shammy? 187 00:08:07,890 --> 00:08:09,650 Yeah, I met him when I was going to hospital. 188 00:08:09,710 --> 00:08:12,351 He was going to have an X-ray to see if he had a day's work in him. 189 00:08:13,210 --> 00:08:15,446 Yeah, he was dead worried when they brought in the three-day week. 190 00:08:15,470 --> 00:08:16,630 He thought it was compulsory. 191 00:08:17,270 --> 00:08:18,830 Now, that'll be 270. 192 00:08:19,050 --> 00:08:19,930 I'll stick it on the slate, Dave. 193 00:08:19,970 --> 00:08:21,166 I'm doing out of chalk, Arthur. 194 00:08:21,190 --> 00:08:22,410 Come on, let's have some cash for a change. 195 00:08:22,430 --> 00:08:23,430 All right, all right. 196 00:08:23,770 --> 00:08:24,890 Don't get me staked. 197 00:08:25,310 --> 00:08:26,010 I've got you loaded. 198 00:08:26,250 --> 00:08:27,250 There you are. 199 00:08:28,270 --> 00:08:31,570 You may scoff, but he is a changed man, and I put you down for marriage. 200 00:08:32,390 --> 00:08:33,866 Yeah, well, Gail's a nice bird, but I mean, 201 00:08:33,867 --> 00:08:35,446 he did only marry her because she had a job. 202 00:08:35,470 --> 00:08:36,230 Yeah, well, she hasn't now. 203 00:08:36,430 --> 00:08:37,646 Yeah, well, I bet he's half-hungry. 204 00:08:37,670 --> 00:08:38,850 You're so cynical, aren't you? 205 00:08:38,851 --> 00:08:40,493 Just because all your personal relationships are 206 00:08:40,494 --> 00:08:42,326 based on the physical rather than the spiritual. 207 00:08:42,350 --> 00:08:43,470 We have a problem, Governor. 208 00:08:44,530 --> 00:08:45,530 What's that, Mr Chidham? 209 00:08:46,040 --> 00:08:47,050 What, a 20-pound note? 210 00:08:47,330 --> 00:08:48,330 No. 211 00:08:54,110 --> 00:08:55,710 There's a lot of them about, apparently. 212 00:08:56,950 --> 00:08:58,170 Dear, dear. 213 00:08:59,070 --> 00:09:00,330 Phoney as a glass eye. 214 00:09:00,750 --> 00:09:03,070 Well, I didn't know I was going to take it out of the bank. 215 00:09:03,220 --> 00:09:06,530 I trust the bold Arthur is not passing off counterfeit currency. 216 00:09:06,910 --> 00:09:08,870 Mr Chidham, do you think I'd do a thing like that? 217 00:09:09,270 --> 00:09:10,630 You really want me to answer that? 218 00:09:11,560 --> 00:09:12,840 You've done me up like a kipper. 219 00:09:13,230 --> 00:09:14,230 Who has? 220 00:09:14,270 --> 00:09:16,110 Yeah, fine piece of work, this. 221 00:09:16,810 --> 00:09:17,310 Any more? 222 00:09:17,575 --> 00:09:19,455 No, I don't even know where I got that one from. 223 00:09:20,120 --> 00:09:22,560 For paying cash, I thought it must be a wind-up, you know. 224 00:09:23,390 --> 00:09:25,210 Well, you've put me in a bit of a quandary. 225 00:09:25,980 --> 00:09:27,490 You've obviously broken the law. 226 00:09:27,690 --> 00:09:29,790 I have not lodged a complaint, Mr Chidham. 227 00:09:29,910 --> 00:09:31,670 Well, I have the evidence, and I'm a witness. 228 00:09:32,030 --> 00:09:32,630 No, no, hold on. 229 00:09:32,670 --> 00:09:34,021 He didn't know it was bent, did he? 230 00:09:34,045 --> 00:09:35,150 That's no excuse. 231 00:09:35,470 --> 00:09:36,290 Ignorance of the law. 232 00:09:36,430 --> 00:09:38,110 You, above all people, should know that. 233 00:09:38,330 --> 00:09:39,410 Come on, Mr Chidham. 234 00:09:39,411 --> 00:09:40,770 I'm a victim of circumstances. 235 00:09:41,270 --> 00:09:42,270 All right. 236 00:09:43,190 --> 00:09:44,190 Where did you get it? 237 00:09:44,550 --> 00:09:45,290 I don't know. 238 00:09:45,370 --> 00:09:46,030 I'm a businessman. 239 00:09:46,190 --> 00:09:48,210 I mean, money passes through my hands hour by hour. 240 00:09:48,360 --> 00:09:49,930 Me too, sometimes. 241 00:09:50,330 --> 00:09:52,570 Incidentally, half of you still owe me £2.70. 242 00:09:52,850 --> 00:09:53,850 Dave, please. 243 00:09:53,910 --> 00:09:54,910 This is a crisis. 244 00:09:54,990 --> 00:09:55,310 Yeah, I know. 245 00:09:55,370 --> 00:09:55,990 I'm out of pocket. 246 00:09:56,190 --> 00:09:57,190 Stick it in the book. 247 00:09:57,430 --> 00:09:58,110 Leave the book. 248 00:09:58,150 --> 00:09:59,870 It's getting longer than Gone With The Wind. 249 00:09:59,910 --> 00:10:00,910 Hello there, Charlie. 250 00:10:01,520 --> 00:10:03,370 You have an obligation as a citizen. 251 00:10:04,160 --> 00:10:06,610 It is your duty to help your local police. 252 00:10:07,200 --> 00:10:08,590 He's asking you to grass. 253 00:10:09,110 --> 00:10:10,110 That's right. 254 00:10:10,820 --> 00:10:13,650 I suppose that's a dirty word in your tiny vocabulary. 255 00:10:13,930 --> 00:10:14,930 That's right. 256 00:10:15,670 --> 00:10:18,110 What's wrong with giving us a bit of information occasionally? 257 00:10:19,015 --> 00:10:20,350 I don't understand you people. 258 00:10:20,830 --> 00:10:21,610 No, you don't, do you? 259 00:10:21,820 --> 00:10:22,980 It's like the old school tie. 260 00:10:23,370 --> 00:10:24,370 Yeah. 261 00:10:24,630 --> 00:10:26,566 That's why half of them will grass their grannies. 262 00:10:26,590 --> 00:10:28,390 Look, I'm inclined to agree there, Mr Chidham. 263 00:10:28,640 --> 00:10:29,640 I blame the media. 264 00:10:29,850 --> 00:10:30,210 Newspapers. 265 00:10:30,850 --> 00:10:32,529 I mean, if you can't rob a bank, you can write 266 00:10:32,530 --> 00:10:34,451 an article about it for Sunday papers, can't you? 267 00:10:34,570 --> 00:10:36,890 Not that I would know those sort of people, you understand? 268 00:10:36,990 --> 00:10:37,990 No. 269 00:10:38,150 --> 00:10:38,910 Syrups lent it. 270 00:10:39,150 --> 00:10:40,150 So? 271 00:10:40,290 --> 00:10:41,290 You didn't. 272 00:10:41,630 --> 00:10:41,990 Go. 273 00:10:41,991 --> 00:10:42,991 Go. 274 00:10:44,730 --> 00:10:45,730 See you later. 275 00:10:51,640 --> 00:10:52,640 Search me, Mr Chidham. 276 00:10:53,340 --> 00:10:54,340 I might. 277 00:10:55,250 --> 00:10:57,420 All kinds of things would leap to the eye. 278 00:10:57,600 --> 00:10:58,776 You're not going to keep that, are you? 279 00:10:58,800 --> 00:10:59,800 Well, of course. 280 00:11:00,660 --> 00:11:02,400 You weren't thinking of using it, were you? 281 00:11:02,620 --> 00:11:03,620 No, no, no, no. 282 00:11:04,000 --> 00:11:05,000 Were you? 283 00:11:05,140 --> 00:11:06,140 No. 284 00:11:09,450 --> 00:11:10,450 Hello, love. 285 00:11:10,690 --> 00:11:11,130 You're early. 286 00:11:11,370 --> 00:11:12,370 What's up? 287 00:11:12,750 --> 00:11:13,750 Lunch. 288 00:11:15,370 --> 00:11:16,810 This is a joke, this sewing machine. 289 00:11:17,590 --> 00:11:19,070 Well, that's down to offer, isn't it? 290 00:11:19,170 --> 00:11:20,570 Mrs Patel knocked on the door. 291 00:11:20,670 --> 00:11:21,670 Ours doesn't work either. 292 00:11:22,870 --> 00:11:24,266 Yeah, and I paid good money for those. 293 00:11:24,290 --> 00:11:25,290 Well, sort of. 294 00:11:26,130 --> 00:11:27,226 Yeah, what's up with her phone? 295 00:11:27,250 --> 00:11:28,250 What do you think? 296 00:11:29,120 --> 00:11:30,850 No, they can't do that. 297 00:11:30,890 --> 00:11:31,890 Not without saying. 298 00:11:32,210 --> 00:11:32,730 They did. 299 00:11:32,890 --> 00:11:34,330 Two bills and a final demand. 300 00:11:35,585 --> 00:11:36,750 I can't work without a phone. 301 00:11:37,310 --> 00:11:38,590 You can use the one in the shop. 302 00:11:40,680 --> 00:11:41,680 You are going back? 303 00:11:43,250 --> 00:11:45,030 No, I've resigned. 304 00:11:45,510 --> 00:11:46,510 No. 305 00:11:47,310 --> 00:11:48,370 How can you resign? 306 00:11:49,120 --> 00:11:50,650 You've only been there five minutes. 307 00:11:51,160 --> 00:11:52,190 Change my mind, can't I? 308 00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:53,690 Anyway, it wasn't right for me. 309 00:11:54,010 --> 00:11:55,310 I'm more executive material. 310 00:11:55,640 --> 00:11:56,640 Well, it was a start. 311 00:11:56,830 --> 00:11:57,830 After eight years... 312 00:11:57,940 --> 00:11:59,130 It wasn't right for me. 313 00:11:59,590 --> 00:12:00,630 Now, I'm not a worker. 314 00:12:00,970 --> 00:12:01,970 I'm me. 315 00:12:02,795 --> 00:12:04,395 You should have married a bus conductor. 316 00:12:04,630 --> 00:12:05,690 Yeah, but I didn't. 317 00:12:06,170 --> 00:12:07,170 Did I? 318 00:12:08,175 --> 00:12:09,575 Anyway, I've got to get to a phone. 319 00:12:09,670 --> 00:12:10,310 Got any change? 320 00:12:10,410 --> 00:12:11,410 No money. 321 00:12:12,190 --> 00:12:13,190 I've got money. 322 00:12:14,020 --> 00:12:15,090 There's plenty of dough. 323 00:12:16,310 --> 00:12:17,770 Well, can I have some? 324 00:12:17,850 --> 00:12:18,410 The gas is due. 325 00:12:18,470 --> 00:12:19,310 And I can settle the phone bill. 326 00:12:19,390 --> 00:12:20,150 Yeah, of course you can. 327 00:12:20,330 --> 00:12:21,110 Anyway, I've got to dash. 328 00:12:21,210 --> 00:12:21,650 See you later. 329 00:12:21,830 --> 00:12:22,090 See you. 330 00:12:22,230 --> 00:12:23,790 I'm going to my mum's this evening. 331 00:12:24,580 --> 00:12:26,066 Well, don't wake us up when you come in, 332 00:12:26,090 --> 00:12:27,186 I've got a busy day tomorrow. 333 00:12:27,210 --> 00:12:27,650 See you, love. 334 00:12:27,890 --> 00:12:28,890 Bye. 335 00:12:30,285 --> 00:12:31,606 Well, then you're going to lose the syrup. 336 00:12:31,630 --> 00:12:32,870 Gordon knows where he's got to. 337 00:12:33,190 --> 00:12:34,886 Well, he ain't going to spend the dough, is he? 338 00:12:34,910 --> 00:12:36,926 I mean, any idiot could tell those notes are rookie. 339 00:12:36,950 --> 00:12:37,950 I took them. 340 00:12:38,370 --> 00:12:39,170 Exactly, yeah. 341 00:12:39,270 --> 00:12:41,266 But you've got to be some special kind of idiot, haven't you? 342 00:12:41,290 --> 00:12:42,790 I trusted that rotten chamois. 343 00:12:43,710 --> 00:12:45,386 You reckoned he was a changed man, didn't you? 344 00:12:45,410 --> 00:12:47,370 That is because I've got compassion in my heart. 345 00:12:47,470 --> 00:12:47,870 Yeah. 346 00:12:47,950 --> 00:12:49,870 And I don't want any soft stuff from you, either. 347 00:12:50,070 --> 00:12:50,810 The old one, too. 348 00:12:50,850 --> 00:12:52,810 I want to see him spattered all over the pavement. 349 00:12:53,010 --> 00:12:55,830 Teeth in the gutter, claret... everywhere. 350 00:12:55,950 --> 00:12:57,626 You've got a perfectly reasonable explanation. 351 00:12:57,650 --> 00:12:58,190 How could he? 352 00:12:58,210 --> 00:12:59,290 What he'd done was inhuman. 353 00:13:00,100 --> 00:13:01,100 It's only 500. 354 00:13:01,330 --> 00:13:02,150 Only 500? 355 00:13:02,340 --> 00:13:03,690 We are talking about trust. 356 00:13:04,760 --> 00:13:07,070 I don't give them bills, invoices, receipts. 357 00:13:07,420 --> 00:13:09,070 I give them my hand and my heart. 358 00:13:09,755 --> 00:13:11,266 Yeah, well, they'd prefer a guarantee, wouldn't they? 359 00:13:11,290 --> 00:13:12,290 I give them my honour. 360 00:13:12,910 --> 00:13:14,230 Right, well, you know what to do. 361 00:13:14,370 --> 00:13:15,430 Yeah, I'll have a chat with him later. 362 00:13:15,431 --> 00:13:15,750 No, no, no. 363 00:13:15,751 --> 00:13:17,231 I told you, the man needs a spanking. 364 00:13:17,290 --> 00:13:17,730 Half-half. 365 00:13:17,810 --> 00:13:18,730 Look, don't you halfer me. 366 00:13:18,790 --> 00:13:20,670 I'm not asking you to hand-draw and quarter him. 367 00:13:20,900 --> 00:13:22,250 Just reasonable retribution. 368 00:13:22,770 --> 00:13:24,250 Haven't you ever seen Clint Eastwood? 369 00:13:24,970 --> 00:13:26,570 Yeah, but I've lost my magnum, haven't I? 370 00:13:27,030 --> 00:13:27,790 Well, are you coming in? 371 00:13:27,930 --> 00:13:28,530 No, no, no, no. 372 00:13:28,531 --> 00:13:29,691 You'll be better on your own. 373 00:13:42,930 --> 00:13:44,050 Terry, Terry, he's out here. 374 00:13:45,490 --> 00:13:46,650 Got a bullet from in there, you know. 375 00:13:46,670 --> 00:13:47,510 He's up the street there. 376 00:13:47,570 --> 00:13:47,810 Yeah. 377 00:13:47,950 --> 00:13:48,630 Well, don't let him get away. 378 00:13:48,830 --> 00:13:51,050 Terry, Terry, Terry! 379 00:14:25,130 --> 00:14:26,210 What's your game, then? 380 00:14:28,050 --> 00:14:29,350 I didn't know it was you, Tom. 381 00:14:30,330 --> 00:14:32,310 Who do you think it was, Sebastian Bleedon Coe? 382 00:14:32,890 --> 00:14:33,990 I know so many people. 383 00:14:35,550 --> 00:14:36,550 What's it all for? 384 00:14:37,630 --> 00:14:38,630 The 385 00:14:42,580 --> 00:14:43,580 man from the council. 386 00:14:44,020 --> 00:14:45,020 Certainly not, madam. 387 00:14:46,500 --> 00:14:47,500 I've got him. 388 00:14:47,740 --> 00:14:49,936 Now, do you want me to hold him while you hit him, or what? 389 00:14:49,960 --> 00:14:51,520 What a deplorable suggestion, Terry. 390 00:14:51,560 --> 00:14:52,560 What made you think that? 391 00:14:52,840 --> 00:14:55,080 You said you wanted him splattered all over the pavement. 392 00:14:55,240 --> 00:14:56,060 No, not me. 393 00:14:56,180 --> 00:14:57,420 No, no, we're civilised people. 394 00:14:58,000 --> 00:15:00,696 I'm sure there's a perfectly reasonable explanation, isn't there, shammy? 395 00:15:00,720 --> 00:15:01,100 Yeah. 396 00:15:01,620 --> 00:15:02,700 Of course there is, Arthur. 397 00:15:02,920 --> 00:15:05,560 I can't imagine what it is, but I'm quite prepared to listen to it. 398 00:15:05,620 --> 00:15:07,500 So shall we to the nearest rubber dump? 399 00:15:07,980 --> 00:15:10,320 There might be people in there I don't want to see, Arthur. 400 00:15:11,090 --> 00:15:13,210 There are people here you don't want to see, sunshine. 401 00:15:13,240 --> 00:15:14,736 So you'll just have a little shufty, 402 00:15:14,760 --> 00:15:16,420 Or as you say, a deco. 403 00:15:20,820 --> 00:15:21,820 It's OK. 404 00:15:21,900 --> 00:15:22,900 Go on in, then. 405 00:15:24,660 --> 00:15:25,660 It's brassic. 406 00:15:26,380 --> 00:15:27,080 I bought them. 407 00:15:27,300 --> 00:15:28,340 Five for each note. 408 00:15:28,440 --> 00:15:29,140 That's nice. 409 00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:30,696 And you told me that shop was yours. 410 00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:31,200 I never did. 411 00:15:31,260 --> 00:15:31,740 Yes, you did. 412 00:15:32,040 --> 00:15:33,040 Did I? 413 00:15:33,400 --> 00:15:35,040 To be honest, I must have been lying. 414 00:15:35,080 --> 00:15:37,140 Look, you bought some sewing machines off me. 415 00:15:37,141 --> 00:15:38,200 I owed money. 416 00:15:38,820 --> 00:15:39,640 Ordinary debts. 417 00:15:39,641 --> 00:15:44,220 You know, playing cards, GGs, gas bill, rates. 418 00:15:45,280 --> 00:15:46,280 Simple things. 419 00:15:47,040 --> 00:15:48,280 I worry about Gail. 420 00:15:48,340 --> 00:15:49,340 She works so hard. 421 00:15:49,680 --> 00:15:51,360 We went down to Eastbourne for the weekend. 422 00:15:51,680 --> 00:15:52,680 I borrowed the dough. 423 00:15:53,040 --> 00:15:54,040 I needed some shoes. 424 00:15:54,100 --> 00:15:55,300 You know what it's like, tell. 425 00:15:55,760 --> 00:15:57,236 Yeah, I know what it's like, yeah. 426 00:15:57,260 --> 00:15:58,340 Haven't you got any assets? 427 00:15:58,780 --> 00:15:59,120 Nothing. 428 00:15:59,720 --> 00:16:01,080 I'm one of nature's debtors. 429 00:16:01,360 --> 00:16:02,800 I was in the red from birth. 430 00:16:03,020 --> 00:16:04,020 Aren't you ashamed? 431 00:16:04,280 --> 00:16:04,840 Yeah, I am. 432 00:16:05,100 --> 00:16:06,100 I am. 433 00:16:06,660 --> 00:16:07,780 I've got a possibility. 434 00:16:08,100 --> 00:16:09,100 Yeah. 435 00:16:09,380 --> 00:16:11,080 I'm thinking of going into show business. 436 00:16:11,480 --> 00:16:12,480 What, Panama? 437 00:16:13,600 --> 00:16:14,080 No. 438 00:16:14,081 --> 00:16:15,081 Movies. 439 00:16:15,400 --> 00:16:16,400 Videos. 440 00:16:16,840 --> 00:16:17,720 Do you want me to cut you in? 441 00:16:17,820 --> 00:16:19,020 Yeah, yeah, I'd love that. 442 00:16:19,540 --> 00:16:22,060 They make more films over there than in Hollywood. 443 00:16:22,360 --> 00:16:24,660 Look, all I'm interested in is my 500. 444 00:16:25,030 --> 00:16:26,040 Don't you trust me? 445 00:16:26,100 --> 00:16:26,480 God. 446 00:16:26,860 --> 00:16:28,060 Look, let me explain. 447 00:16:28,730 --> 00:16:31,220 The big money is over there in India, right? 448 00:16:32,180 --> 00:16:32,780 Not here. 449 00:16:33,020 --> 00:16:34,840 They ain't got the facilities over there. 450 00:16:35,180 --> 00:16:36,460 And the government hates videos. 451 00:16:37,020 --> 00:16:41,180 You get the master tape of a brand-new Indian film, take it over to Bombay, 452 00:16:41,500 --> 00:16:43,740 sell it, a license to print money. 453 00:16:43,840 --> 00:16:45,336 Yeah, you know all about that, don't you? 454 00:16:45,360 --> 00:16:47,240 All right, so I needed some easy money. 455 00:16:47,640 --> 00:16:51,180 Well, like you've always said, if you want money, you've got to work for it. 456 00:16:51,460 --> 00:16:52,460 He said that? 457 00:16:53,000 --> 00:16:54,040 Yeah, well, I think. 458 00:16:54,260 --> 00:16:55,460 Anyway, that's what I'm doing. 459 00:16:55,630 --> 00:16:58,420 There's a brand-new film out called Storm Over Kathmandu. 460 00:16:58,560 --> 00:16:59,560 Dear, dear. 461 00:16:59,640 --> 00:17:02,300 It's like Dallas, E.T., Gandhi all put together. 462 00:17:02,680 --> 00:17:04,336 Well, they like family films over there, don't they? 463 00:17:04,360 --> 00:17:05,260 So you're going to be rich? 464 00:17:05,261 --> 00:17:05,820 Yeah. 465 00:17:06,040 --> 00:17:07,040 Come on, Terry. 466 00:17:07,280 --> 00:17:08,760 Yeah, but I need some help. 467 00:17:08,860 --> 00:17:09,876 Yeah, I know what you're going to say. 468 00:17:09,900 --> 00:17:10,660 You need some money. 469 00:17:10,880 --> 00:17:11,900 What sort of help? 470 00:17:12,000 --> 00:17:13,000 Your wife. 471 00:17:15,160 --> 00:17:16,880 Terrence, this man is molesting me. 472 00:17:17,020 --> 00:17:18,880 For this is the best offer you've had all day. 473 00:17:18,900 --> 00:17:20,300 Listen, you are importuning me. 474 00:17:20,520 --> 00:17:22,440 Look, some measly pounds. 475 00:17:22,560 --> 00:17:24,696 There's a by-law to protect us against people like you. 476 00:17:24,720 --> 00:17:25,720 Come on, Terry. 477 00:17:26,160 --> 00:17:27,600 Terry, you understand, don't you? 478 00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:29,800 Listen, for once in his life, he might be right. 479 00:17:29,920 --> 00:17:31,440 Well, why can't people trust me? 480 00:17:31,600 --> 00:17:31,900 You? 481 00:17:32,160 --> 00:17:34,740 All right, I'll tell a couple of poor... He's now a man. 482 00:17:34,840 --> 00:17:36,520 Now and then, it's all the time, isn't it? 483 00:17:36,580 --> 00:17:38,900 Yeah, but I've never hurt anyone, Terry, and you know that. 484 00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:40,040 Come on. 485 00:17:40,420 --> 00:17:43,080 Look, all I'm asking for is half an hour of your time tomorrow. 486 00:17:43,200 --> 00:17:44,100 30 minutes, that's all. 487 00:17:44,160 --> 00:17:44,980 Jam jar, ain't it, boy? 488 00:17:44,981 --> 00:17:45,760 All right, all right, all right. 489 00:17:45,780 --> 00:17:46,780 Yeah, pick up the tape. 490 00:17:46,820 --> 00:17:47,180 Terrific. 491 00:17:47,620 --> 00:17:49,196 Great, you're one of the good guys, Terry. 492 00:17:49,220 --> 00:17:49,460 Yeah. 493 00:17:49,780 --> 00:17:50,780 Bye, Arthur. 494 00:17:51,840 --> 00:17:52,440 No. 495 00:17:52,680 --> 00:17:53,400 Jeez. 496 00:17:53,680 --> 00:17:55,360 Look, I'm in the middle of a business discussion. 497 00:17:55,361 --> 00:17:56,040 I can't help you. 498 00:17:56,220 --> 00:17:56,740 I won't. 499 00:17:57,180 --> 00:17:58,180 He's a biker. 500 00:18:00,340 --> 00:18:01,340 He's busy. 501 00:18:22,470 --> 00:18:24,580 It looks like a real driving school car. 502 00:18:24,660 --> 00:18:25,660 It is. 503 00:18:26,100 --> 00:18:28,560 No disrespect, Arthur, but what's all that about approved? 504 00:18:28,760 --> 00:18:29,760 They all have that. 505 00:18:29,930 --> 00:18:30,980 Yeah, but approved by who? 506 00:18:31,040 --> 00:18:32,040 By me. 507 00:18:32,230 --> 00:18:33,820 Yeah, I get it. 508 00:18:34,570 --> 00:18:35,930 That's going to be a winner, this. 509 00:18:37,700 --> 00:18:40,040 Incidentally, have you got a licence for me, just in case? 510 00:18:40,360 --> 00:18:41,040 In case of what? 511 00:18:41,290 --> 00:18:42,290 In case I get a pull. 512 00:18:42,620 --> 00:18:43,880 I had a licence years ago. 513 00:18:43,900 --> 00:18:44,440 You what? 514 00:18:44,640 --> 00:18:46,940 You came here as a bona fide instructor. 515 00:18:46,941 --> 00:18:48,080 I never said that. 516 00:18:48,140 --> 00:18:49,040 I taught me brother. 517 00:18:49,041 --> 00:18:49,820 Your brother? 518 00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:51,120 He's in Maidstone Jail. 519 00:18:51,310 --> 00:18:52,920 Yeah, not for a driving offence. 520 00:18:53,300 --> 00:18:54,300 Stolen motor. 521 00:18:55,020 --> 00:18:57,456 There's nothing wrong with his driving, that was as sweet as a nut. 522 00:18:57,480 --> 00:18:58,480 You misled me. 523 00:18:59,050 --> 00:19:00,730 Nah, you must have been Brahms that night. 524 00:19:01,730 --> 00:19:03,980 I never said anything about being a bona fide instructor. 525 00:19:05,670 --> 00:19:07,380 All I said was anybody could do it. 526 00:19:08,300 --> 00:19:11,036 Look, I'll guarantee tomorrow I'll have all the credentials you want? 527 00:19:11,060 --> 00:19:12,160 And a driving licence. 528 00:19:19,490 --> 00:19:20,620 Oi, where's that tea? 529 00:19:20,940 --> 00:19:22,220 Alright, alright, it's coming. 530 00:19:24,640 --> 00:19:26,960 Did you take some 20 pound notes out of that box? 531 00:19:28,900 --> 00:19:30,300 Yeah, I took 40 quid for the bills. 532 00:19:30,600 --> 00:19:31,600 What, and they took them? 533 00:19:32,080 --> 00:19:33,080 Why not? 534 00:19:35,320 --> 00:19:37,080 No, Shammy, they weren't Dad's worth, 535 00:19:37,290 --> 00:19:39,210 Yeah, well there's hundreds of them about, innit? 536 00:19:39,590 --> 00:19:40,700 They even gave me change. 537 00:19:41,120 --> 00:19:42,640 Well, we got a result then, didn't we? 538 00:19:42,820 --> 00:19:43,840 You don't care, do you? 539 00:19:44,420 --> 00:19:45,720 Don't start all that. 540 00:19:45,800 --> 00:19:47,480 I'm having a bit of bad luck at the moment. 541 00:19:48,020 --> 00:19:48,920 Well, there's even more. 542 00:19:49,040 --> 00:19:50,880 Some other bloke was trying to get hold of you. 543 00:19:51,000 --> 00:19:51,780 Kamal or somebody. 544 00:19:51,781 --> 00:19:52,781 Him. 545 00:19:52,980 --> 00:19:54,300 50 quid ten days ago. 546 00:19:54,540 --> 00:19:57,100 I tell you, that's the last time I ever borrow any money off him. 547 00:19:57,440 --> 00:19:58,440 I don't know. 548 00:19:58,520 --> 00:20:00,540 Why can't you work like all the other Injuns? 549 00:20:00,620 --> 00:20:01,980 You'd love that, wouldn't you? 550 00:20:02,020 --> 00:20:03,020 Yeah, I would. 551 00:20:03,340 --> 00:20:05,140 I mean, you don't even like curry. 552 00:20:05,460 --> 00:20:06,800 Everybody likes curry. 553 00:20:07,240 --> 00:20:09,436 And you got all these romantic ideas about the East, didn't you? 554 00:20:09,460 --> 00:20:10,100 Taj Mahal. 555 00:20:10,240 --> 00:20:12,740 Well, you thought the Taj Mahal was a calf up Brick Lane. 556 00:20:13,170 --> 00:20:14,530 And you watch too much television. 557 00:20:15,560 --> 00:20:16,560 Now be nice to me? 558 00:20:19,430 --> 00:20:20,520 I'm gonna have a great day. 559 00:20:20,760 --> 00:20:21,760 I just know it. 560 00:20:21,860 --> 00:20:22,580 Let's tell. 561 00:20:22,800 --> 00:20:23,800 See you later, love. 562 00:20:25,600 --> 00:20:26,600 You're in. 563 00:20:27,280 --> 00:20:28,280 Bye. 564 00:20:48,500 --> 00:20:49,500 15 of them. 565 00:20:50,660 --> 00:20:51,100 300. 566 00:20:51,640 --> 00:20:52,680 Why didn't you check them? 567 00:20:53,170 --> 00:20:54,170 No, you don't, do you? 568 00:20:54,580 --> 00:20:57,100 You don't expect that, not from somebody with a scalp condition. 569 00:20:57,900 --> 00:20:58,900 Are you describing? 570 00:20:59,160 --> 00:21:02,780 Yes, well, he is at this moment wearing a Roger Moore. 571 00:21:03,800 --> 00:21:06,500 One of our more popular lines and completely waterproof. 572 00:21:08,520 --> 00:21:09,100 Waterproof? 573 00:21:09,200 --> 00:21:09,600 Yes, sir. 574 00:21:09,601 --> 00:21:10,601 Keeps the rain off. 575 00:21:11,760 --> 00:21:12,760 Off what? 576 00:21:13,200 --> 00:21:14,200 Their brains. 577 00:21:14,550 --> 00:21:18,620 You can swim in a Roger Moore using our special exclusive adhesive. 578 00:21:19,330 --> 00:21:22,040 Well, apart from glue on his scalp, any other distinctive features? 579 00:21:23,580 --> 00:21:24,640 No, no. 580 00:21:24,850 --> 00:21:27,580 I'd say nondescript, give or take. 581 00:21:28,160 --> 00:21:31,720 Scars, moles, big hooter, dodgy eye. 582 00:21:32,220 --> 00:21:37,100 No, no, as I say, nondescript, face in the crowd, ordinary. 583 00:21:38,190 --> 00:21:40,660 Mind you, I'd recognise his scalp anywhere. 584 00:21:41,620 --> 00:21:45,340 Unfortunately, we don't have a file on cranium prints. 585 00:21:46,480 --> 00:21:47,520 Well, there was one thing. 586 00:21:47,700 --> 00:21:48,700 Could be a clue. 587 00:21:49,610 --> 00:21:51,060 He left his old wig here. 588 00:21:52,040 --> 00:21:54,860 A cheap nylon hairpiece circa 1972. 589 00:21:56,780 --> 00:21:58,680 An early Engelbert Humperdinck, I should say. 590 00:21:59,560 --> 00:22:00,580 In need of renovation. 591 00:22:03,080 --> 00:22:04,080 Renovation? 592 00:22:04,635 --> 00:22:05,900 He's got real dandruff. 593 00:22:06,110 --> 00:22:07,256 It's not in the best of condition. 594 00:22:07,280 --> 00:22:09,800 I've seen better-looking rats down the old East India Dock. 595 00:22:10,580 --> 00:22:11,580 Here, James, try it on. 596 00:22:12,100 --> 00:22:12,460 Me? 597 00:22:12,600 --> 00:22:13,160 What have I done? 598 00:22:13,220 --> 00:22:14,220 Do you want a list? 599 00:22:14,960 --> 00:22:17,860 We're trying to picture the face beneath this apparition. 600 00:22:18,680 --> 00:22:19,680 Now, try it on. 601 00:22:32,590 --> 00:22:33,790 I feel all right, Burke, yeah? 602 00:22:34,020 --> 00:22:35,020 True, true. 603 00:22:39,990 --> 00:22:40,990 The syrup. 604 00:22:41,470 --> 00:22:41,830 What? 605 00:22:42,410 --> 00:22:43,410 Syrup of figs. 606 00:22:43,550 --> 00:22:44,550 Who? 607 00:22:44,810 --> 00:22:46,610 A character known to the police. 608 00:22:47,250 --> 00:22:47,570 Aye. 609 00:22:47,875 --> 00:22:50,330 I'll take this Irish into custody. 610 00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:53,000 I've got a plastic bag. 611 00:22:53,030 --> 00:22:54,030 Of course. 612 00:22:54,890 --> 00:22:55,890 You got a suspect? 613 00:22:56,470 --> 00:22:56,950 Yes. 614 00:22:57,130 --> 00:22:59,870 Well, you could say he has a price on his head. 615 00:23:00,250 --> 00:23:02,050 That's an amazing bit of deduction, Sergeant. 616 00:23:02,250 --> 00:23:05,350 By the way, have you ever thought about a hairpiece yourself? 617 00:23:07,410 --> 00:23:08,410 Why? 618 00:23:08,470 --> 00:23:10,950 Well, we are receding a little, sir, aren't we? 619 00:23:12,070 --> 00:23:13,070 We get by. 620 00:23:13,410 --> 00:23:16,650 I'm sure you do, but it can be disabling, socially, I mean. 621 00:23:17,150 --> 00:23:18,150 Professionally, even. 622 00:23:18,530 --> 00:23:22,750 I think sir's macho image might be greatly enhanced with a Burt Reynolds, 623 00:23:23,050 --> 00:23:24,850 one of our range, or even a Starsky. 624 00:23:25,500 --> 00:23:27,750 Very popular with the upper ranks down at the yard. 625 00:23:28,230 --> 00:23:29,730 I was going to suggest that to your girlfriend. 626 00:23:29,731 --> 00:23:30,130 No way. 627 00:23:30,310 --> 00:23:31,310 Yes. 628 00:23:31,770 --> 00:23:32,770 No. 629 00:23:33,170 --> 00:23:34,170 No, not really. 630 00:23:36,640 --> 00:23:37,800 Shall I take the plastic bag? 631 00:23:40,530 --> 00:23:41,430 Keep it running, Top. 632 00:23:41,530 --> 00:23:42,530 I'll only be a minute. 633 00:24:02,560 --> 00:24:03,560 Hey, 634 00:24:25,660 --> 00:24:26,990 I got away with it. 635 00:24:27,410 --> 00:24:28,410 How about that? 636 00:24:29,530 --> 00:24:30,530 Did you lick that video? 637 00:24:31,110 --> 00:24:32,110 Me? 638 00:24:32,250 --> 00:24:33,250 Course not. 639 00:24:34,175 --> 00:24:35,466 What are you so excited about then? 640 00:24:35,490 --> 00:24:36,490 I'm not. 641 00:24:37,830 --> 00:24:39,606 Why do you keep looking out the back window, then? 642 00:24:39,630 --> 00:24:40,630 I wasn't. 643 00:24:41,050 --> 00:24:42,050 Strange. 644 00:24:42,350 --> 00:24:43,750 Come on, let's go to your place. 645 00:24:44,090 --> 00:24:44,510 My place? 646 00:24:44,530 --> 00:24:45,170 What's wrong with yours? 647 00:24:45,490 --> 00:24:46,690 They're after me, aren't they? 648 00:24:46,890 --> 00:24:47,130 Who? 649 00:24:47,650 --> 00:24:48,650 Everyone. 650 00:24:49,075 --> 00:24:50,115 Well, it serves you right. 651 00:24:50,550 --> 00:24:51,790 All right, what about Arthur's? 652 00:24:52,190 --> 00:24:54,857 Listen, son, you'd have to pay him back that 500 quid, plus 653 00:24:54,957 --> 00:24:57,230 100% interest, before you could even sleep on his floor. 654 00:24:57,710 --> 00:24:58,790 So suspicious, ain't it? 655 00:24:58,890 --> 00:24:59,890 Yeah. 656 00:24:59,930 --> 00:25:01,110 All right, I know a place. 657 00:25:01,190 --> 00:25:02,510 It's not far from where you live. 658 00:25:06,050 --> 00:25:06,670 The boat here? 659 00:25:07,050 --> 00:25:08,290 No, no, no, just him, just one. 660 00:25:08,970 --> 00:25:09,970 Any luggage? 661 00:25:10,150 --> 00:25:11,150 No, it's at the station. 662 00:25:11,790 --> 00:25:13,690 £30 a night, in advance. 663 00:25:17,070 --> 00:25:18,070 Any room service? 664 00:25:18,270 --> 00:25:21,050 Yeah, continental breakfast, two pounds extra. 665 00:25:21,430 --> 00:25:23,070 And you can have a curry across the road. 666 00:25:24,210 --> 00:25:25,210 Cheers. 667 00:25:25,290 --> 00:25:27,230 Number 57, down the end of the passage. 668 00:25:27,630 --> 00:25:28,750 Have a nice day. 669 00:25:33,050 --> 00:25:34,410 Yeah, but she's here now, smudger. 670 00:25:35,120 --> 00:25:36,120 Your first pupil. 671 00:25:37,950 --> 00:25:39,270 Well, how long's that gonna take? 672 00:25:42,020 --> 00:25:43,180 Well, quick as you can, then. 673 00:25:43,570 --> 00:25:44,570 Yeah, yeah. 674 00:25:49,450 --> 00:25:52,190 Unfortunately, my dear, one of my instructors has been delayed. 675 00:25:52,630 --> 00:25:54,270 Should only be about half an hour, though. 676 00:25:54,555 --> 00:25:55,670 Well, can't you take me? 677 00:25:56,190 --> 00:25:57,510 Well, no, I am the principal. 678 00:25:58,260 --> 00:25:59,260 You can drive, can't you? 679 00:25:59,590 --> 00:26:02,230 Young lady, I have personally taught the highest and the low. 680 00:26:03,090 --> 00:26:04,701 From advanced motorists to people who don't know the 681 00:26:04,702 --> 00:26:06,970 difference between a slip differential and a windscreen wiper. 682 00:26:06,971 --> 00:26:08,670 Well, you'll do, then, or I'll go. 683 00:26:08,890 --> 00:26:09,450 No, no, no. 684 00:26:09,710 --> 00:26:11,950 Have you actually put down a deposit? 685 00:26:12,400 --> 00:26:14,170 No, I want that new introductory offer. 686 00:26:14,270 --> 00:26:15,410 Ten less than 60 sold. 687 00:26:15,490 --> 00:26:17,050 Yes, certainly, my dear, certainly. 688 00:26:17,450 --> 00:26:18,450 What's all that about? 689 00:26:18,610 --> 00:26:19,770 You can't be too careful. 690 00:26:20,155 --> 00:26:21,186 Well, give them back, then. 691 00:26:21,210 --> 00:26:22,736 No, no, no, no, that's perfectly all right. 692 00:26:22,760 --> 00:26:24,290 What am I, the phantom forger? 693 00:26:24,530 --> 00:26:25,570 No, no, no, of course not. 694 00:26:26,290 --> 00:26:26,830 Shall we? 695 00:26:27,220 --> 00:26:28,310 I know the rudiments. 696 00:26:28,830 --> 00:26:30,450 I mean, I failed my test four times. 697 00:26:30,530 --> 00:26:31,550 They're all against me. 698 00:26:31,970 --> 00:26:32,310 Who are? 699 00:26:32,510 --> 00:26:33,190 All of them. 700 00:26:33,485 --> 00:26:34,605 They don't like my attitude. 701 00:26:52,010 --> 00:26:53,010 No, no, no. 702 00:26:53,190 --> 00:26:54,690 Young lady, you must do this right. 703 00:26:55,460 --> 00:26:57,713 Have you checked your door, your seatbelt, 704 00:26:57,714 --> 00:26:59,630 and made sure the gear lever is in neutral? 705 00:26:59,710 --> 00:27:00,810 Yeah, yeah, yeah. 706 00:27:00,910 --> 00:27:02,310 No, no, no, I haven't finished yet. 707 00:27:02,390 --> 00:27:06,530 Now, I noticed right away that you had missed a crucial point... point. 708 00:27:07,210 --> 00:27:10,410 Now, you must remember, your mirror is your best friend. 709 00:27:10,910 --> 00:27:12,030 We're in the yard. 710 00:27:12,170 --> 00:27:12,670 It doesn't matter. 711 00:27:12,750 --> 00:27:13,370 It should be automatic. 712 00:27:13,630 --> 00:27:14,070 Where are you going? 713 00:27:14,230 --> 00:27:14,830 I don't know. 714 00:27:14,850 --> 00:27:15,230 The brake. 715 00:27:15,330 --> 00:27:15,850 Where did you put the brake? 716 00:27:15,870 --> 00:27:16,870 I don't know. 717 00:27:20,210 --> 00:27:22,470 I don't know what you're getting so excited about. 718 00:27:22,860 --> 00:27:25,510 I'm not excited, my dear. 719 00:27:26,260 --> 00:27:28,946 You must realize that it is very difficult to stop the 720 00:27:28,996 --> 00:27:31,240 motor if you have got your foot on the accelerator. 721 00:27:32,690 --> 00:27:34,850 Now, let us go out nice and easy. 722 00:27:35,270 --> 00:27:36,270 Not yet. 723 00:27:37,270 --> 00:27:38,270 Not yet. 724 00:27:48,750 --> 00:27:49,530 Right, right. 725 00:27:49,610 --> 00:27:51,010 Now, nice bit of clutch work. 726 00:27:51,530 --> 00:27:52,530 Easy gear change. 727 00:27:54,180 --> 00:27:55,180 Now, we go left. 728 00:27:57,230 --> 00:27:57,810 Look out! 729 00:27:57,970 --> 00:27:58,970 Brake! 730 00:28:00,190 --> 00:28:00,630 Left. 731 00:28:00,730 --> 00:28:01,730 I said left. 732 00:28:02,710 --> 00:28:03,710 Left. 733 00:28:03,890 --> 00:28:04,890 Gently at the first. 734 00:28:05,110 --> 00:28:05,850 My God. 735 00:28:05,910 --> 00:28:07,890 We drive on the left in this country. 736 00:28:09,030 --> 00:28:10,030 I said left. 737 00:28:10,370 --> 00:28:11,010 It doesn't matter. 738 00:28:11,210 --> 00:28:11,890 I think it does. 739 00:28:11,990 --> 00:28:13,670 You see, if I say left and you go right... 740 00:28:14,530 --> 00:28:15,050 My God! 741 00:28:15,090 --> 00:28:15,390 Brake! 742 00:28:15,590 --> 00:28:16,590 Brake! 743 00:28:16,930 --> 00:28:17,930 Brake! 744 00:28:20,660 --> 00:28:21,660 Very good, Denise. 745 00:28:23,440 --> 00:28:24,080 My God. 746 00:28:24,100 --> 00:28:24,800 He's taking my number. 747 00:28:24,880 --> 00:28:25,880 Drive on. 748 00:28:25,980 --> 00:28:28,800 You see, Denise, you may not think it's important that when I say left, 749 00:28:28,920 --> 00:28:29,540 you go right. 750 00:28:29,900 --> 00:28:31,740 And, of course, I suppose cosmically, it isn't. 751 00:28:31,860 --> 00:28:34,840 But to mere mortals like myself, it gets confusing. 752 00:28:35,120 --> 00:28:35,780 Sod it, then. 753 00:28:35,820 --> 00:28:36,440 We go left. 754 00:28:36,520 --> 00:28:37,520 Look where you're going! 755 00:28:57,710 --> 00:28:59,050 I really enjoyed that. 756 00:29:01,240 --> 00:29:03,230 Well, same time next week, then, Mr. Daly. 757 00:29:03,670 --> 00:29:04,670 Ta-da! 758 00:29:06,890 --> 00:29:07,890 You all right, Arthur? 759 00:29:09,230 --> 00:29:10,410 Hot sweet tea. 760 00:29:12,090 --> 00:29:13,350 Hot sweet tea. 761 00:29:14,720 --> 00:29:16,200 You know, you look a bit uncle to me. 762 00:29:17,550 --> 00:29:18,550 You all right? 763 00:29:19,780 --> 00:29:21,380 No, you sound a bit strange, that's all. 764 00:29:21,690 --> 00:29:22,890 Listen, never mind about that. 765 00:29:23,110 --> 00:29:24,110 Sammy's had a result. 766 00:29:24,810 --> 00:29:27,436 Yeah, that film he was talking about, he reckons he ought to see you. 767 00:29:27,460 --> 00:29:29,420 Yeah, but every time I see him, it costs me money. 768 00:29:31,300 --> 00:29:33,130 All right, all right, I'll see him. 769 00:29:34,230 --> 00:29:35,830 But I am not in the best of health. 770 00:29:37,830 --> 00:29:38,830 Yeah. 771 00:29:39,630 --> 00:29:40,630 Bye-bye. 772 00:29:46,535 --> 00:29:48,970 I'd like to see Mr. Gopal, who checked in earlier today. 773 00:29:49,640 --> 00:29:52,610 Yeah, at number 57, down the end of the passageway. 774 00:29:52,770 --> 00:29:53,770 Tough. 775 00:30:01,120 --> 00:30:02,120 How much? 776 00:30:02,260 --> 00:30:02,580 500. 777 00:30:02,840 --> 00:30:04,120 A ticket to Bombay, that's all. 778 00:30:04,240 --> 00:30:04,840 You hear this? 779 00:30:04,900 --> 00:30:06,300 This is the man who already owes me. 780 00:30:06,320 --> 00:30:08,400 Yeah, but look, he's got this master tape, hasn't he? 781 00:30:08,440 --> 00:30:09,640 Sounds like a good deal to me. 782 00:30:09,920 --> 00:30:11,400 Sounds like a good deal, does it? 783 00:30:11,500 --> 00:30:13,156 Look, how are your investments these days? 784 00:30:13,180 --> 00:30:14,220 How is the old portfolio? 785 00:30:14,320 --> 00:30:14,720 What are you into? 786 00:30:14,980 --> 00:30:16,760 Bricks and mortar, commodities, unit trusts? 787 00:30:17,100 --> 00:30:18,620 You don't know nothing about business. 788 00:30:18,700 --> 00:30:19,700 Well, don't ask me, then. 789 00:30:19,780 --> 00:30:20,360 No, I won't. 790 00:30:20,520 --> 00:30:22,256 Look, I don't think you understand what he's saying. 791 00:30:22,280 --> 00:30:23,576 I know perfectly well what he's saying. 792 00:30:23,600 --> 00:30:25,700 He's saying he wants to go to Bombay and buy a videotape. 793 00:30:25,720 --> 00:30:26,320 That's not it. 794 00:30:26,670 --> 00:30:28,020 I'm not buying, I'm selling. 795 00:30:28,300 --> 00:30:29,180 That is what I said. 796 00:30:29,240 --> 00:30:30,240 No, you didn't. 797 00:30:30,300 --> 00:30:33,440 Look, this is the biggest thing since sliced bread or instant rice. 798 00:30:33,840 --> 00:30:35,160 Storm over Kathmandu. 799 00:30:35,810 --> 00:30:39,420 Look, every village in India has got a video, but they can't get a new film. 800 00:30:39,870 --> 00:30:42,170 All I've got to do is take the master over to Bombay, 801 00:30:42,245 --> 00:30:44,940 hand it over to a certain bloke, he'll flood the market. 802 00:30:45,300 --> 00:30:46,300 We'll be rich. 803 00:30:46,380 --> 00:30:48,180 Well, a hundred grand, now that's rich for me. 804 00:30:48,240 --> 00:30:49,720 I told you you didn't understand him. 805 00:30:49,960 --> 00:30:53,540 A ticket to Bombay and a couple of quid for a hotel and food, that's all. 806 00:30:53,800 --> 00:30:54,800 And Bob's your uncle. 807 00:30:56,300 --> 00:30:57,560 It can't be that easy. 808 00:30:58,380 --> 00:30:59,560 Arthur, it is. 809 00:31:00,940 --> 00:31:01,940 Indian, you reckon? 810 00:31:02,320 --> 00:31:04,380 Of that persuasion, I would say. 811 00:31:05,335 --> 00:31:07,800 Well, we can't have Indians messing up our currency, can we? 812 00:31:07,840 --> 00:31:08,020 No. 813 00:31:08,021 --> 00:31:08,700 What room? 814 00:31:09,040 --> 00:31:11,000 Number 57, at the end of the passage. 815 00:31:11,240 --> 00:31:12,520 Do you want me to come with you? 816 00:31:12,720 --> 00:31:14,500 No, that's all right, but thanks. 817 00:31:16,550 --> 00:31:19,340 You see, there's just one little problem if we let you go to Bombay. 818 00:31:20,650 --> 00:31:21,880 We may never see you again. 819 00:31:23,230 --> 00:31:24,720 I don't even like the food, Arthur. 820 00:31:27,320 --> 00:31:28,580 You can help me or not. 821 00:31:31,280 --> 00:31:32,280 Hello. 822 00:31:33,200 --> 00:31:34,200 Happy birthday. 823 00:31:34,340 --> 00:31:36,480 What a surprise, Mr Jones, meeting you here. 824 00:31:37,400 --> 00:31:39,160 You haven't introduced your friend, have you? 825 00:31:39,300 --> 00:31:40,020 No, he's not my friend. 826 00:31:40,080 --> 00:31:41,080 He's a friend of Terry's. 827 00:31:42,555 --> 00:31:45,636 Yeah, this is Detective Constable... You asked him a constable, didn't you? 828 00:31:45,660 --> 00:31:46,540 Detective Constable Jones. 829 00:31:46,560 --> 00:31:47,560 Oi! 830 00:31:48,300 --> 00:31:49,620 He's in a bit of a hurry, though. 831 00:32:09,840 --> 00:32:10,840 Well, what do you think? 832 00:32:45,820 --> 00:32:46,820 What an error for men. 833 00:32:47,560 --> 00:32:48,680 Bleeding freezing out there. 834 00:32:48,800 --> 00:32:49,800 You got the tape? 835 00:32:50,325 --> 00:32:52,100 Yeah, I've got... What time is it? 836 00:32:52,600 --> 00:32:53,260 Five o'clock. 837 00:32:53,261 --> 00:32:53,980 Great. 838 00:32:54,180 --> 00:32:55,716 You've taken a chance coming here, haven't you? 839 00:32:55,740 --> 00:32:56,740 Well, haven't you? 840 00:32:57,220 --> 00:32:58,500 I haven't done anything, have I? 841 00:32:59,260 --> 00:33:00,380 You got a fire or something? 842 00:33:01,920 --> 00:33:03,520 Yeah, it's... Yeah, it's there. 843 00:33:11,310 --> 00:33:13,730 That copper was only after the notes, not the tape. 844 00:33:15,380 --> 00:33:16,380 Why didn't you go home? 845 00:33:17,030 --> 00:33:17,890 What do you think? 846 00:33:17,910 --> 00:33:19,110 They're after me, aren't they? 847 00:33:19,660 --> 00:33:21,230 I walk the streets all bleeding night. 848 00:33:22,670 --> 00:33:23,510 What's it on with, Arthur? 849 00:33:23,570 --> 00:33:24,570 Me going to Bombay? 850 00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:26,210 God knows, mate. 851 00:33:27,410 --> 00:33:27,810 Pity. 852 00:33:28,070 --> 00:33:29,350 I thought they were rather good. 853 00:33:29,610 --> 00:33:30,690 Terrific, weren't they? 854 00:33:30,860 --> 00:33:32,430 Nearly got you nicked, me and Arthur. 855 00:33:33,790 --> 00:33:35,350 Have you ever thought of getting a job? 856 00:33:36,230 --> 00:33:37,130 No, no, no. 857 00:33:37,131 --> 00:33:38,131 Sorry, sorry. 858 00:33:46,590 --> 00:33:47,590 Morning. 859 00:33:48,210 --> 00:33:49,210 Morning, Sergeant. 860 00:34:00,700 --> 00:34:01,360 Morning, girl. 861 00:34:01,460 --> 00:34:02,460 Guns. 862 00:34:04,850 --> 00:34:07,560 See, from the duty book, there was an incident with a 20-pound note. 863 00:34:08,060 --> 00:34:09,060 Again. 864 00:34:09,480 --> 00:34:12,080 I ran after the man, but he got away. 865 00:34:13,345 --> 00:34:15,560 And when I got back, Daly had gone. 866 00:34:19,440 --> 00:34:20,440 Daly? 867 00:34:21,420 --> 00:34:21,900 Aye. 868 00:34:21,901 --> 00:34:22,901 And his friend. 869 00:34:26,600 --> 00:34:28,660 You had him banged to rights and he got away? 870 00:34:29,880 --> 00:34:30,880 He hadn't done anything. 871 00:34:36,870 --> 00:34:39,160 May I outline the scenario so far? 872 00:34:40,040 --> 00:34:45,340 During the last 48 hours, Arthur Daly has passed a counterfeit 20-pound note. 873 00:34:45,580 --> 00:34:49,620 In that well-known den of thieves, the Winchester, among the company was a 874 00:34:49,621 --> 00:34:54,680 certain character known as the Syrup, who a few hours later uses 15 bent 20s to 875 00:34:54,681 --> 00:34:58,920 turn over a wig maker and make off in a Roger Moore look-alike toupee. 876 00:34:59,220 --> 00:35:05,340 Last night, at a down-market hotel, Arthur Daly was seen with a person unknown 877 00:35:05,640 --> 00:35:07,380 who passed counterfeit money. 878 00:35:07,690 --> 00:35:10,780 I asked myself, is this mere fortuitousness? 879 00:35:11,490 --> 00:35:12,540 I think not. 880 00:35:13,420 --> 00:35:14,420 I agree, Gus. 881 00:35:20,760 --> 00:35:22,344 Now, there are certain things in life that 882 00:35:22,345 --> 00:35:25,401 are more important than nicking Arthur Daly. 883 00:35:26,690 --> 00:35:29,100 But for the moment, I can't think of any. 884 00:35:30,550 --> 00:35:33,040 He is a thorn in my flesh. 885 00:35:34,240 --> 00:35:36,040 A tickle in my throat. 886 00:35:37,795 --> 00:35:39,520 I had hair when I started on this manor. 887 00:35:41,380 --> 00:35:45,340 I don't approve of his pathetic, trivial wheezes. 888 00:35:46,300 --> 00:35:47,300 Goldfish. 889 00:35:47,940 --> 00:35:50,060 Albanian sparkling wine. 890 00:35:50,780 --> 00:35:52,480 Flood-damaged bathing suits. 891 00:35:53,140 --> 00:35:54,960 You got a laugh, though, haven't you? 892 00:35:55,600 --> 00:35:56,600 No. 893 00:35:56,910 --> 00:35:59,640 Well, he got that microwave for our canteen. 894 00:36:00,180 --> 00:36:01,180 Burnt offerings. 895 00:36:01,680 --> 00:36:02,680 Aye. 896 00:36:03,105 --> 00:36:06,500 The idea of him circulating dodgy 20-pound notes, it's incredible. 897 00:36:08,760 --> 00:36:09,760 Even better. 898 00:36:11,770 --> 00:36:14,100 He was printing currency of the realm. 899 00:36:14,960 --> 00:36:16,540 That's a staggering thought, Gav. 900 00:36:18,400 --> 00:36:19,400 Awesome. 901 00:36:20,540 --> 00:36:21,540 Right, on your bike. 902 00:36:21,840 --> 00:36:22,020 What? 903 00:36:22,080 --> 00:36:23,956 I've got an appointment with the tame magistrate. 904 00:36:23,980 --> 00:36:25,100 Warren's, Arthur Lovecotent. 905 00:36:25,620 --> 00:36:26,800 Now, just a minute, Gav. 906 00:36:26,840 --> 00:36:27,740 I'm off duty in five minutes. 907 00:36:27,760 --> 00:36:28,760 No, you're not. 908 00:36:37,670 --> 00:36:38,250 Zero, dear. 909 00:36:38,450 --> 00:36:39,810 Gave me quite a little turn, then. 910 00:36:40,850 --> 00:36:41,890 Well, good day, gentlemen. 911 00:36:42,430 --> 00:36:43,430 Buying or selling? 912 00:36:44,720 --> 00:36:46,210 Please, open the door and enter. 913 00:36:46,370 --> 00:36:47,770 That's just what I was going to do. 914 00:36:47,870 --> 00:36:48,870 Can I help you? 915 00:36:49,930 --> 00:36:50,930 Absolutely. 916 00:36:53,230 --> 00:36:54,250 It's funny seeing you. 917 00:36:54,650 --> 00:36:56,090 I was down Brick Lane the other day. 918 00:37:07,370 --> 00:37:09,941 Um, you, Brothers? 919 00:37:10,060 --> 00:37:11,380 Brothers in arms. 920 00:37:13,340 --> 00:37:15,200 I understand you have an article of mine. 921 00:37:15,520 --> 00:37:16,520 Me? 922 00:37:16,730 --> 00:37:20,340 Shami stole my tape, but he was accompanied by your employee. 923 00:37:20,560 --> 00:37:21,560 I want it. 924 00:37:22,010 --> 00:37:24,320 Please, sit down. 925 00:37:28,340 --> 00:37:29,800 There's no nonsense about this. 926 00:37:30,130 --> 00:37:34,560 We're going to search this place piece by piece, brick by brick. 927 00:37:35,720 --> 00:37:38,560 And eventually, bone by bone. 928 00:37:44,270 --> 00:37:45,270 Begin. 929 00:37:45,710 --> 00:37:47,310 Look, I haven't got it. 930 00:37:47,620 --> 00:37:52,590 Very careful, and if we don't find it here, we'll do the same to McCann. 931 00:37:53,950 --> 00:37:54,950 Would you like a cigar? 932 00:37:55,490 --> 00:37:55,670 No. 933 00:37:56,410 --> 00:37:56,590 So? 934 00:37:57,170 --> 00:38:00,030 Well, among other things, I'm also a wholesale tobacconist. 935 00:38:00,540 --> 00:38:01,950 This could be your lucky day. 936 00:38:02,210 --> 00:38:04,330 Would you be interested in eight groves of cigarillos? 937 00:38:04,590 --> 00:38:05,590 Argentina, actually. 938 00:38:06,030 --> 00:38:08,846 But, you know, with the political backlash, it's a bit difficult to shift them. 939 00:38:08,870 --> 00:38:09,350 Well, thank you. 940 00:38:09,730 --> 00:38:12,086 Well, there's many other things here that could be of interest. 941 00:38:12,110 --> 00:38:16,130 I own three corner shops, four newsagents, a couple of do-it-yourself shops. 942 00:38:16,580 --> 00:38:17,890 Paint, five litre pots. 943 00:38:18,590 --> 00:38:20,990 Perfect for your handyman, as used by the local council. 944 00:38:21,210 --> 00:38:22,710 We call it institutional green. 945 00:38:32,730 --> 00:38:34,170 They don't like it, you know. 946 00:38:34,530 --> 00:38:35,530 Warrants. 947 00:38:36,380 --> 00:38:37,910 I can't wait to see Daley's boat race. 948 00:38:38,750 --> 00:38:40,250 I'll be on the old trombone in two minutes. 949 00:38:40,251 --> 00:38:40,690 To whom? 950 00:38:40,930 --> 00:38:42,610 The whole team. 951 00:38:43,030 --> 00:38:44,030 Busybodies. 952 00:38:44,770 --> 00:38:45,770 Release. 953 00:38:46,870 --> 00:38:47,870 Samaritans. 954 00:38:48,770 --> 00:38:49,770 Exit. 955 00:38:51,050 --> 00:38:52,050 Gay rights. 956 00:38:52,690 --> 00:38:53,690 Not mine. 957 00:38:53,890 --> 00:38:54,890 No, no, no, it's not. 958 00:38:56,290 --> 00:38:57,450 Gone with the wind. 959 00:38:57,830 --> 00:38:59,550 There's a lot of other things in this place. 960 00:39:01,640 --> 00:39:02,650 To catch a thief. 961 00:39:02,770 --> 00:39:03,770 One of the greats. 962 00:39:04,910 --> 00:39:05,910 Shall I mark your card? 963 00:39:07,710 --> 00:39:09,070 You mean this one? 964 00:39:09,120 --> 00:39:10,630 No, no, no, no, it's not a title. 965 00:39:10,910 --> 00:39:13,990 What I'm trying to say is, these videos are from a different era. 966 00:39:14,550 --> 00:39:14,870 Really? 967 00:39:15,150 --> 00:39:16,150 Yeah. 968 00:39:17,570 --> 00:39:19,450 Well, Mr Daley... 969 00:39:21,090 --> 00:39:22,350 I'm going to mark yours. 970 00:39:26,330 --> 00:39:27,480 Do you know about Gandhi? 971 00:39:27,900 --> 00:39:28,940 Yeah, one of your own. 972 00:39:29,140 --> 00:39:29,800 Great little man. 973 00:39:30,140 --> 00:39:31,501 He believed in passive resistance. 974 00:39:31,960 --> 00:39:33,896 Yeah, we could do with a bit more of that these days. 975 00:39:33,920 --> 00:39:34,920 Not me. 976 00:39:35,780 --> 00:39:38,167 Well, there's still some Indians who believe in turning 977 00:39:38,168 --> 00:39:40,500 the other cheek and the meek shall inherit the earth. 978 00:39:41,700 --> 00:39:43,181 But there's another tradition, Arthur. 979 00:39:44,900 --> 00:39:46,616 You don't mind my calling you Arthur, do you? 980 00:39:46,640 --> 00:39:47,640 No, no, it's an honour. 981 00:39:48,220 --> 00:39:49,600 Warriors, for example. 982 00:39:51,540 --> 00:39:52,000 Jagannaths. 983 00:39:52,420 --> 00:39:53,420 What, lorries? 984 00:39:53,860 --> 00:39:54,860 Thuggy. 985 00:39:55,905 --> 00:39:57,626 Those chaps could certainly have a good row. 986 00:39:58,580 --> 00:39:59,580 Do you get my drift? 987 00:40:00,350 --> 00:40:01,500 In other words... 988 00:40:05,415 --> 00:40:09,100 Well, to use rather an apt expression, you're up the Khyber. 989 00:40:10,050 --> 00:40:11,731 No, no, I think you mean I'm up the Swanee. 990 00:40:11,890 --> 00:40:13,180 You've got ten seconds. 991 00:40:13,540 --> 00:40:14,820 Look, you've got it all wrong. 992 00:40:15,880 --> 00:40:16,280 Six... 993 00:40:16,760 --> 00:40:18,161 Listen... Hello, Mr Chisholm. 994 00:40:18,360 --> 00:40:19,360 Nice to see you. 995 00:40:19,600 --> 00:40:20,761 What's this, a Dutch auction? 996 00:40:22,300 --> 00:40:23,840 Or even a doolally auction. 997 00:40:24,180 --> 00:40:26,223 Do you know Detective Sergeant Chisholm, a 998 00:40:26,224 --> 00:40:29,181 leading light in the thin blue line around here? 999 00:40:31,810 --> 00:40:34,360 Well, I suppose you have a lot of business to do. 1000 00:40:34,640 --> 00:40:35,640 Good morning, Mr Daly. 1001 00:40:35,840 --> 00:40:36,840 Good morning. 1002 00:40:37,400 --> 00:40:38,400 And you, Sergeant. 1003 00:40:40,380 --> 00:40:41,380 Chalo. 1004 00:40:41,440 --> 00:40:42,440 Chalo. 1005 00:40:43,600 --> 00:40:44,600 See you, boys. 1006 00:40:47,340 --> 00:40:48,340 Makan. 1007 00:40:49,420 --> 00:40:49,880 Jaldi. 1008 00:40:50,060 --> 00:40:50,260 Chalo. 1009 00:40:50,890 --> 00:40:51,960 What are you selling now? 1010 00:40:52,810 --> 00:40:54,060 Second-hand pop-items? 1011 00:40:54,780 --> 00:40:57,260 No, I like to do my bit for racialist relationships. 1012 00:40:57,640 --> 00:40:59,840 That bloke last night, he was Indian. 1013 00:41:00,020 --> 00:41:01,020 What? 1014 00:41:01,180 --> 00:41:02,180 The bloke in the hotel. 1015 00:41:02,480 --> 00:41:03,460 Now he tells me. 1016 00:41:03,500 --> 00:41:04,500 Was he amongst that lot? 1017 00:41:04,680 --> 00:41:06,780 Well... And don't say they all look the same. 1018 00:41:07,080 --> 00:41:09,040 No, definitely not him. 1019 00:41:11,100 --> 00:41:14,300 So what is this bond between you and our Asian brothers? 1020 00:41:15,050 --> 00:41:19,734 Only the other day, over in Brick Lane, bending our ears in the Winchester about. 1021 00:41:19,781 --> 00:41:20,140 What's his name? 1022 00:41:20,340 --> 00:41:20,740 Shammy? 1023 00:41:20,920 --> 00:41:21,540 Is that the connection? 1024 00:41:21,840 --> 00:41:22,840 Never heard of him. 1025 00:41:23,020 --> 00:41:24,080 Oi, oi, hold on, hold on. 1026 00:41:24,120 --> 00:41:25,240 Those are personal effects. 1027 00:41:26,305 --> 00:41:28,540 Come on, Mr Chisholm, that's a bit presumptuous. 1028 00:41:28,920 --> 00:41:30,740 I do have some rights, you know. 1029 00:41:30,800 --> 00:41:31,420 Like what? 1030 00:41:31,540 --> 00:41:33,140 You are trespassing on private property. 1031 00:41:33,430 --> 00:41:37,040 Unless you have a magistrate's search warrant sworn, signed and sealed. 1032 00:41:41,440 --> 00:41:42,440 All right. 1033 00:41:45,020 --> 00:41:46,300 Want to phone the law centre? 1034 00:41:47,280 --> 00:41:48,280 Citizen's advice? 1035 00:41:49,220 --> 00:41:50,220 Channel 4? 1036 00:41:51,830 --> 00:41:53,751 I think the best thing you should do is sit down. 1037 00:41:55,080 --> 00:41:58,500 Or better still, kneel down and pray that we don't find anything. 1038 00:41:59,090 --> 00:42:00,940 Look, Mr Chisholm, what have I done? 1039 00:42:01,040 --> 00:42:01,840 All sorts of things. 1040 00:42:01,960 --> 00:42:03,780 I was hoping to find a printing press. 1041 00:42:04,300 --> 00:42:05,300 Print... Why? 1042 00:42:05,710 --> 00:42:07,791 Well, somebody must be printing these 20-pound notes. 1043 00:42:08,110 --> 00:42:09,480 Would I do that? 1044 00:42:09,520 --> 00:42:09,840 Probably. 1045 00:42:10,380 --> 00:42:13,180 Come on, Mr Chisholm, all these years you've known me. 1046 00:42:13,280 --> 00:42:14,280 Yes. 1047 00:42:15,760 --> 00:42:16,760 Miss Selfridge. 1048 00:42:19,110 --> 00:42:20,840 You'd do anything for a pound or a penny. 1049 00:42:21,860 --> 00:42:25,480 For a 20-pound note, you'd mortgage your soul. 1050 00:42:26,300 --> 00:42:28,180 That is an offensive remark, Mr Chisholm. 1051 00:42:28,520 --> 00:42:29,800 I've been saving that one up. 1052 00:42:31,115 --> 00:42:32,660 Why have I come to see you? 1053 00:42:33,710 --> 00:42:35,920 Mr Chisholm, a man is impersonating Roger Moore. 1054 00:42:36,600 --> 00:42:38,640 Sundry Indians booking to hotels. 1055 00:42:39,380 --> 00:42:40,860 What is the common denominator? 1056 00:42:42,120 --> 00:42:44,340 All roads lead to Daly. 1057 00:42:45,280 --> 00:42:47,480 In that case, you'd better search then. 1058 00:42:47,600 --> 00:42:48,600 You carry on. 1059 00:42:51,670 --> 00:42:53,980 Have you found anything yet? 1060 00:42:54,390 --> 00:42:55,780 All kinds of remarkable things. 1061 00:42:56,860 --> 00:42:57,860 Everlasting pencils. 1062 00:42:57,980 --> 00:42:59,276 No, no, no, don't buy any of them. 1063 00:42:59,300 --> 00:43:00,300 That's just a gimmick. 1064 00:43:00,720 --> 00:43:01,720 Scotch. 1065 00:43:03,020 --> 00:43:04,020 Lochheim. 1066 00:43:04,160 --> 00:43:04,680 Lochheim? 1067 00:43:05,080 --> 00:43:06,080 Jews say that. 1068 00:43:06,160 --> 00:43:08,220 Yeah, that is for discerning Jewish Scotch drinkers. 1069 00:43:08,380 --> 00:43:09,380 I cater for all palates. 1070 00:43:12,420 --> 00:43:12,940 Hello. 1071 00:43:13,420 --> 00:43:13,940 It's me. 1072 00:43:14,320 --> 00:43:15,320 I'm with Shammy. 1073 00:43:15,960 --> 00:43:17,481 He wants some dough to get his ticket. 1074 00:43:18,050 --> 00:43:19,196 There's a flight this afternoon. 1075 00:43:19,220 --> 00:43:20,220 We'll shoot over, OK? 1076 00:43:20,820 --> 00:43:23,501 Why don't you... Who's that? 1077 00:43:24,640 --> 00:43:25,640 You know me, Terrence. 1078 00:43:26,345 --> 00:43:27,345 Did you say Shammy? 1079 00:43:27,600 --> 00:43:28,740 Is that our Indian friend? 1080 00:43:30,770 --> 00:43:32,140 What's the matter with you people? 1081 00:43:32,200 --> 00:43:33,200 Don't you trust us? 1082 00:43:35,050 --> 00:43:36,220 Go over to McCann's place. 1083 00:43:38,000 --> 00:43:40,560 I'll stay here with the bold Arthur just in case 1084 00:43:40,561 --> 00:43:43,421 McCann is stupid enough to drop in for a cup of tea. 1085 00:43:43,540 --> 00:43:44,540 Why shouldn't he? 1086 00:43:45,020 --> 00:43:47,660 I mean, the only folding I'm holding was rolled off by Her Majesty. 1087 00:43:50,880 --> 00:43:51,480 Here you go. 1088 00:43:51,720 --> 00:43:52,720 Cheers. 1089 00:44:01,340 --> 00:44:02,340 You got your passport? 1090 00:44:23,255 --> 00:44:24,910 Could be a secret panel. 1091 00:44:25,410 --> 00:44:26,410 Yeah. 1092 00:44:26,660 --> 00:44:28,150 We might find all kinds of things. 1093 00:44:28,350 --> 00:44:30,270 Yeah, and damp will be one of them. 1094 00:44:31,920 --> 00:44:33,240 There's a screwdriver over there. 1095 00:44:39,010 --> 00:44:39,490 Bent? 1096 00:44:39,950 --> 00:44:40,950 Only slightly. 1097 00:44:49,850 --> 00:44:50,850 Dear, dear. 1098 00:44:53,435 --> 00:44:54,790 As you say, Arthur, damp. 1099 00:44:55,480 --> 00:44:56,800 I'll have to get the builders in. 1100 00:44:57,150 --> 00:44:58,150 What was it? 1101 00:44:58,430 --> 00:44:59,430 Nothing. 1102 00:44:59,570 --> 00:45:01,571 You're not complaining about my behaviour, are you? 1103 00:45:01,730 --> 00:45:02,730 Certainly not. 1104 00:45:02,970 --> 00:45:03,370 I don't know. 1105 00:45:03,570 --> 00:45:05,670 It's like having a till at a hum to tea. 1106 00:45:16,355 --> 00:45:18,860 This is a nutcase, Arthur, no question about it. 1107 00:45:19,220 --> 00:45:20,220 A nutcase. 1108 00:45:24,270 --> 00:45:25,620 Dear, dear, Arthur. 1109 00:45:26,560 --> 00:45:27,600 Not your lucky day. 1110 00:45:37,290 --> 00:45:38,290 Hey, look. 1111 00:45:39,110 --> 00:45:40,110 Chalo. 1112 00:45:45,010 --> 00:45:46,010 Do you know what that is? 1113 00:45:46,570 --> 00:45:46,870 Yeah. 1114 00:45:47,390 --> 00:45:48,610 I took it to a small fortune. 1115 00:45:50,420 --> 00:45:51,966 That's the best thing that ever happened to me. 1116 00:45:51,990 --> 00:45:53,210 My first Yankee, ever. 1117 00:45:54,030 --> 00:45:55,030 How'd you pull that out? 1118 00:45:55,910 --> 00:45:57,151 Just fancied them, I just knew. 1119 00:45:57,530 --> 00:45:57,890 Thanks. 1120 00:45:58,330 --> 00:45:59,830 Jeez, well, it's just luck, then. 1121 00:46:00,210 --> 00:46:00,870 Don't knock it. 1122 00:46:01,170 --> 00:46:02,806 Am I going to have the same luck with you, 1123 00:46:02,830 --> 00:46:03,190 Me? 1124 00:46:03,790 --> 00:46:03,870 Yeah. 1125 00:46:03,871 --> 00:46:04,871 Yeah, you. 1126 00:46:05,290 --> 00:46:06,330 You going to stitch me up? 1127 00:46:06,710 --> 00:46:08,390 You going to do a runner with my dough, 1128 00:46:08,650 --> 00:46:10,531 Or are you going to remember how far we go back? 1129 00:46:10,960 --> 00:46:13,200 Remember, Shammy, page one is you don't knock your mates. 1130 00:46:14,310 --> 00:46:16,730 Now, I'm trusting you, and I'm the only one who does. 1131 00:46:17,310 --> 00:46:18,350 I won't let you down, Tal. 1132 00:46:23,420 --> 00:46:24,420 Send us a postcard? 1133 00:46:28,020 --> 00:46:29,630 It's very quiet without Arthur, isn't it? 1134 00:46:30,670 --> 00:46:32,511 You fancy him having an early night, don't you? 1135 00:46:32,810 --> 00:46:36,350 The only time he'd done that before was the first night of his honeymoon. 1136 00:46:38,070 --> 00:46:39,130 Here's your cocktail, sir. 1137 00:46:41,090 --> 00:46:42,330 What do you reckon? 1138 00:46:42,970 --> 00:46:43,590 Handsome? 1139 00:46:43,870 --> 00:46:44,630 All right, I'll give him. 1140 00:46:44,690 --> 00:46:45,690 What have you come as? 1141 00:46:45,730 --> 00:46:46,730 Roger Moore. 1142 00:46:47,470 --> 00:46:49,110 That's Roger Moore, look. 1143 00:46:49,320 --> 00:46:50,320 It's my new identity. 1144 00:46:51,470 --> 00:46:53,830 I've cleaned up my act, as they say. 1145 00:46:54,710 --> 00:46:55,750 Nobody recognises me. 1146 00:46:56,090 --> 00:46:57,090 I recognise you, sir. 1147 00:46:57,370 --> 00:46:58,370 Yeah? 1148 00:46:58,800 --> 00:47:00,960 But you had to think about it for a minute, didn't you? 1149 00:47:01,790 --> 00:47:04,350 Give me a large brandy, Dave. 1150 00:47:04,730 --> 00:47:05,730 Coming up. 1151 00:47:05,910 --> 00:47:08,030 You know, I'll always be grateful for Arthur. 1152 00:47:08,595 --> 00:47:10,076 Yeah, well, he don't see it that way. 1153 00:47:10,350 --> 00:47:11,630 He reckons you nicked his money. 1154 00:47:11,790 --> 00:47:12,790 How could I? 1155 00:47:13,040 --> 00:47:14,510 It wasn't real money, was it? 1156 00:47:14,760 --> 00:47:15,870 He's got a point there, hasn't he? 1157 00:47:15,890 --> 00:47:17,506 I mean, Arthur couldn't have spent it, could he? 1158 00:47:17,530 --> 00:47:19,250 He would have thought of a way, wouldn't he? 1159 00:47:19,310 --> 00:47:21,170 In fact, I'd done him a favour. 1160 00:47:22,130 --> 00:47:24,746 If he'd had the dough in his pocket, Chisholm would have nicked him. 1161 00:47:24,770 --> 00:47:28,430 I mean, to be fair, obviously I'd give him a drink again. 1162 00:47:29,320 --> 00:47:30,930 I think you'd rather have 500 sovs. 1163 00:47:33,470 --> 00:47:35,410 You know that mirror's out of order, don't you? 1164 00:47:36,490 --> 00:47:37,490 Brilliant, isn't it? 1165 00:47:38,310 --> 00:47:39,810 I might even get a job. 1166 00:47:40,430 --> 00:47:40,850 What as? 1167 00:47:41,130 --> 00:47:42,130 A newscaster? 1168 00:47:42,230 --> 00:47:43,730 No, no, an executive. 1169 00:47:44,250 --> 00:47:45,250 I've got a suit. 1170 00:47:46,800 --> 00:47:49,410 And I owe you a score as well, from the betting shops. 1171 00:47:50,270 --> 00:47:50,830 Come on. 1172 00:47:50,850 --> 00:47:52,598 Listen, you might have a licence to kill someone, 1173 00:47:52,599 --> 00:47:54,226 but there's no chance you're getting away with that. 1174 00:47:54,250 --> 00:47:55,250 I don't know. 1175 00:47:55,450 --> 00:47:56,450 How about this? 1176 00:47:56,890 --> 00:47:57,570 Here you go, Sheriff. 1177 00:47:57,690 --> 00:47:58,450 A large brandy. 1178 00:47:58,590 --> 00:47:59,590 Thanks, Dave. 1179 00:48:02,810 --> 00:48:03,890 No, no, no. 1180 00:48:05,610 --> 00:48:06,610 Nice try, Sheriff. 1181 00:48:07,545 --> 00:48:10,410 He don't look a bit like Roger Moore, not in a million years. 1182 00:48:11,180 --> 00:48:12,421 Threw it a bit slow, didn't he? 1183 00:48:12,450 --> 00:48:14,186 He didn't even mind when Chisholm nicked him. 1184 00:48:14,210 --> 00:48:16,066 That was the right result, him getting off like that. 1185 00:48:16,090 --> 00:48:17,410 I don't know how they managed it. 1186 00:48:18,350 --> 00:48:20,590 You see his face when Churchill... Hey, hold up, hold up. 1187 00:48:20,710 --> 00:48:21,710 Look who's here. 1188 00:48:22,580 --> 00:48:23,941 God, we're not leading typical, 1189 00:48:24,000 --> 00:48:26,360 He disappears for weeks on end and then sends his old woman. 1190 00:48:26,410 --> 00:48:27,930 If she wants money, she's your friend. 1191 00:48:30,170 --> 00:48:30,730 Hello, love. 1192 00:48:30,910 --> 00:48:31,110 Hello. 1193 00:48:31,310 --> 00:48:31,770 Hello, dear. 1194 00:48:32,060 --> 00:48:34,830 Good news, like Sammy's got malaria or curry poisoning? 1195 00:48:35,550 --> 00:48:36,410 Terry, that's yours. 1196 00:48:36,550 --> 00:48:38,230 He cabled it and he's having a great time. 1197 00:48:38,500 --> 00:48:40,790 Didn't get as much as he thought, but even so... 1198 00:48:41,890 --> 00:48:43,130 Why didn't he come and hand it? 1199 00:48:43,570 --> 00:48:44,290 He loves it. 1200 00:48:44,570 --> 00:48:45,570 I'm going over as well. 1201 00:48:45,710 --> 00:48:46,290 Bought me a ticket. 1202 00:48:46,650 --> 00:48:48,126 I thought he'd only go on for the day. 1203 00:48:48,150 --> 00:48:49,650 Yeah, but he reckons he likes it. 1204 00:48:49,890 --> 00:48:50,550 He's got a job. 1205 00:48:50,830 --> 00:48:51,490 No, that's he eats. 1206 00:48:51,610 --> 00:48:52,610 It's affecting his brain. 1207 00:48:52,910 --> 00:48:55,830 Anyway, there's two grand there for you, Terry, and he said to say thanks. 1208 00:48:55,870 --> 00:48:56,330 Got to dash. 1209 00:48:56,470 --> 00:48:56,730 Bye. 1210 00:48:56,830 --> 00:48:57,830 Ta-ra. 1211 00:48:58,110 --> 00:48:58,550 Thank you. 1212 00:48:58,790 --> 00:48:59,630 What do you mean, two grand? 1213 00:48:59,690 --> 00:49:00,770 500 of that is mine. 1214 00:49:01,190 --> 00:49:02,690 Yeah, and 1,500 is mine. 1215 00:49:03,130 --> 00:49:03,410 Why? 1216 00:49:03,510 --> 00:49:04,550 I had all the aggravation. 1217 00:49:04,650 --> 00:49:05,330 You what? 1218 00:49:05,350 --> 00:49:06,406 You'd better check those notes. 1219 00:49:06,430 --> 00:49:07,310 It might run in the family. 1220 00:49:07,370 --> 00:49:08,050 Nah, they're all right. 1221 00:49:08,270 --> 00:49:09,310 Well, at least count them. 1222 00:49:09,750 --> 00:49:10,750 All right. 1223 00:49:12,015 --> 00:49:16,490 20, 40, 60, 80, 100... Hang on. 1224 00:49:18,300 --> 00:49:23,091 120, 140, 160, 180... 200. 1225 00:49:23,990 --> 00:49:26,130 Sorry, I miscounted. 1226 00:49:27,710 --> 00:49:29,390 260, 280... I'll forget. 1227 00:49:29,510 --> 00:49:30,510 I'll start again. 1228 00:49:33,650 --> 00:49:34,970 If you 1229 00:49:50,260 --> 00:49:54,460 want to, I'll change the situation 1230 00:49:59,250 --> 00:50:02,110 I'm just the wrong location 1231 00:50:09,600 --> 00:50:14,752 Just you keep me near, I'll be so good for you I could be so 1232 00:50:14,753 --> 00:50:21,740 good for you I'm gonna help you One and two I'll do anything 1233 00:50:26,840 --> 00:50:32,172 I could be so good for you I'll do a lot One and two There 1234 00:50:32,173 --> 00:50:39,220 ain't nothing I can't go through I'll be so good for you 1234 00:50:40,305 --> 00:51:40,336 Watch Online Movies and Series for FREE www.osdb.link/lm