"My 600-lb Life" Zsalynn's Story

1 00:00:02,933 --> 00:00:05,633 Woman: I FELT LIKE MISS AMERICA. 2 00:00:05,633 --> 00:00:06,933 I DECIDED, YOU KNOW, 3 00:00:06,933 --> 00:00:09,733 "WHATEVER SIZE I AM, I'M JUST GONNA BE THIS SIZE." 4 00:00:09,733 --> 00:00:11,133 THE WEIGHT JUST PILED ON, 5 00:00:11,133 --> 00:00:13,100 TO THE POINT WHERE I'D LOST COUNT. 6 00:00:13,100 --> 00:00:17,400 NOW I'M NOT LIVING A LIFE. I'M JUST EXISTING. 7 00:00:21,833 --> 00:00:25,200 Woman #2: SOMETIMES IT FEELS LIKE I'M DEAD, 8 00:00:25,200 --> 00:00:27,333 LIKE THAT I'M NOT ALIVE. 9 00:00:27,333 --> 00:00:29,067 Woman #3: IF I COULD DO IT WITHOUT THE SURGERY, 10 00:00:29,067 --> 00:00:30,100 I WOULD HAVE DONE IT. 11 00:00:30,100 --> 00:00:32,067 MY WAY DOESN'T WORK. 12 00:00:39,467 --> 00:00:42,700 AND THIS IS A DYNAMIC THAT WE NEED TO CHANGE NOW. 13 00:00:42,700 --> 00:00:46,100 I'M DONE WITH THIS! I QUIT! [SOBS] I'M DONE! 14 00:00:50,033 --> 00:00:52,967 OH, IT HURTS. 15 00:00:52,967 --> 00:00:54,867 [ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ] 16 00:00:54,867 --> 00:00:56,600 I CAN'T BE THE REASON YOU LOSE WEIGHT 17 00:00:56,600 --> 00:00:58,400 OR THE REASON YOU GAIN WEIGHT. PERIOD. 18 00:00:58,400 --> 00:01:01,200 [ Crying ] I WILL MAKE THIS WORK. I PROMISE. 19 00:01:02,533 --> 00:01:05,200 Zsalynn: I DON'T WANT HIM TO LOOK LIKE HE DOESN'T CARE, 20 00:01:05,200 --> 00:01:09,500 'CAUSE I KNOW SOMEWHERE INSIDE OF HIS HEART HE MUST CARE. 21 00:01:11,767 --> 00:01:14,767 -- Captions by VITAC -- www.vitac.com 22 00:01:14,767 --> 00:01:17,800 CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY DISCOVERY COMMUNICATIONS 23 00:01:19,100 --> 00:01:20,700 Zsalynn: WHEN YOU REALIZE 24 00:01:20,700 --> 00:01:23,867 THAT YOU HAVE TO MAKE A CHANGE OR YOU'RE GONNA DIE, 25 00:01:23,867 --> 00:01:25,800 IT'S SURPRISING WHAT YOU LEARN, 26 00:01:25,800 --> 00:01:29,300 NOT JUST ABOUT YOURSELF BUT ABOUT THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU. 27 00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:37,074 28 00:01:49,067 --> 00:01:51,567 I'M MISERABLE. 29 00:01:54,100 --> 00:01:58,833 WHEN YOU'RE NOT JUST FAT BUT SUPERSIZED, 30 00:01:58,833 --> 00:02:02,300 EVERYTHING IS REALLY HARD. 31 00:02:06,133 --> 00:02:09,433 I'M NOT LIVING A LIFE. I'M JUST EXISTING. 32 00:02:09,433 --> 00:02:14,200 [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] 33 00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:18,667 I JUST HATE WAKING UP AND BEING IN MY SKIN. 34 00:02:21,933 --> 00:02:26,067 [ Voice breaking ] I REALLY HATE BEING THIS SIZE. 35 00:02:26,067 --> 00:02:30,433 I HAVE BECOME SO IMMOBILE. 36 00:02:30,433 --> 00:02:34,333 I DON'T DO ANYTHING. 37 00:02:34,333 --> 00:02:37,600 MY DAYS ARE FILLED WITH EATING AND SITTING ON THE COUCH, 38 00:02:37,600 --> 00:02:39,500 EATING, TAKING A NAP. 39 00:02:39,500 --> 00:02:43,667 I PROBABLY WATCH 7 OR 8 HOURS OF TV A DAY. 40 00:02:43,667 --> 00:02:45,867 THIS IS NO LIFE. 41 00:02:45,867 --> 00:02:47,633 [ GRUNTS ] 42 00:02:47,633 --> 00:02:50,800 WHEN I STAND UP, IT'S REALLY, REALLY PAINFUL. 43 00:02:53,233 --> 00:02:55,633 IT HURTS MY JOINTS -- MY KNEES, MY ANKLES, MY HIPS -- 44 00:02:55,633 --> 00:02:57,300 SO MUCH, 45 00:02:57,300 --> 00:03:01,867 I WANT TO JUST SIT RIGHT BACK DOWN. 46 00:03:01,867 --> 00:03:06,067 THE PAIN'S UNBEARABLE. 47 00:03:06,067 --> 00:03:09,733 IT'S JUST [SIGHS] YOU KNOW -- IT'S HARD. 48 00:03:13,067 --> 00:03:16,933 AS A CHILD, I WAS ALWAYS CHUBBY. I WAS ALWAYS FAT. 49 00:03:16,933 --> 00:03:19,067 I CAN REMEMBER GOING THROUGH A CATALOG 50 00:03:19,067 --> 00:03:21,367 AND CIRCLING CLOTHES THAT I WOULD LIKE TO HAVE 51 00:03:21,367 --> 00:03:22,667 TO GO TO SCHOOL IN, 52 00:03:22,667 --> 00:03:25,833 AND MY MOM WOULD SAY THAT THOSE AREN'T THE KIND OF CLOTHES 53 00:03:25,833 --> 00:03:27,433 THAT FAT KIDS WEAR TO SCHOOL. 54 00:03:27,433 --> 00:03:28,900 MY MOTHER WOULDN'T ALLOW ME 55 00:03:28,900 --> 00:03:30,933 TO LICK ENVELOPES OR POSTAGE STAMPS, 56 00:03:30,933 --> 00:03:33,467 'CAUSE SHE THOUGHT THEY HAD CALORIES. 57 00:03:33,467 --> 00:03:36,067 BEING FAT -- FOR MY MOTHER, IT JUST WASN'T AN OPTION. 58 00:03:36,067 --> 00:03:39,800 Zane: ZSALYNN WAS A NORMAL WEIGHT PROBABLY TILL AGE 5. 59 00:03:39,800 --> 00:03:42,333 ELEMENTARY SCHOOL, FOURTH AND FIFTH GRADE -- 60 00:03:42,333 --> 00:03:44,333 THEN IT REALLY STARTED COMING ON, 61 00:03:44,333 --> 00:03:47,233 AND IT JUST SEEMED LIKE SHE BALLOONED OVERNIGHT. 62 00:03:47,233 --> 00:03:50,567 AND MOTHER WOULD TELL HER, "TILL YOU LOSE 10 POUNDS, 63 00:03:50,567 --> 00:03:52,933 YOU'RE NOT GETTING ANY MORE CLOTHES." 64 00:03:52,933 --> 00:03:56,067 Zsalynn: MY MOTHER DIDN'T HAVE TIME FOR ME, 65 00:03:56,067 --> 00:03:57,267 SO I FED MYSELF. 66 00:03:57,267 --> 00:04:00,600 FROM FRESHMAN YEAR TO SENIOR YEAR, 67 00:04:00,600 --> 00:04:05,933 I WENT FROM 170 AND ENDED UP AT ABOUT 375. 68 00:04:07,667 --> 00:04:09,967 THE WEIGHT JUST PILED ON FROM THERE, 69 00:04:09,967 --> 00:04:12,333 TO THE POINT WHERE I JUST LOST COUNT. 70 00:04:12,333 --> 00:04:18,533 42 YEARS OLD, AND I WEIGH 550-PLUS POUNDS, 71 00:04:18,533 --> 00:04:23,067 AND I -- I FEEL NOT TOO GOOD ABOUT THAT. 72 00:04:23,067 --> 00:04:25,467 I BOUGHT A SCALE THAT GOES TO 500, 73 00:04:25,467 --> 00:04:28,300 BUT IT -- IT JUST READS "ERROR" NOW. 74 00:04:33,500 --> 00:04:36,667 WHEN I SAW THE SWEET, SUGARY CEREAL AISLE, 75 00:04:36,667 --> 00:04:40,633 MY CART JUST AUTOMATICALLY TURNED. 76 00:04:40,633 --> 00:04:43,500 ONE OF THE MAIN REASONS THAT I'M FAT 77 00:04:43,500 --> 00:04:48,433 IS BECAUSE I HAVE THIS ADDICTION TO SUGAR. 78 00:04:48,433 --> 00:04:50,300 IT'S MY CRACK COCAINE. 79 00:04:50,300 --> 00:04:53,967 IT'S MY HEROIN. IT'S MY EVERYTHING. 80 00:04:53,967 --> 00:04:57,667 GET SOME FROSTING FOR MY BROWNIES. 81 00:04:57,667 --> 00:04:58,933 I CAN'T BELIEVE THEY HAVE 82 00:04:58,933 --> 00:05:01,267 ALL THESE DIFFERENT KINDS OF BROWNIE MIXES. 83 00:05:05,367 --> 00:05:07,800 [ CASH REGISTER BEEPING ] 84 00:05:13,567 --> 00:05:15,067 MMM. 85 00:05:15,067 --> 00:05:16,133 [ SIGHS ] 86 00:05:16,133 --> 00:05:17,400 * AH * 87 00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:21,667 THERE'S, LIKE, A BIG, BRIGHT LIGHT SHINING DOWN. 88 00:05:23,167 --> 00:05:25,067 MMM. 89 00:05:26,967 --> 00:05:30,167 [ Chuckling ] IT'S REALLY, REALLY GOOD. 90 00:05:30,167 --> 00:05:34,667 IT'S SO SUGARY SWEET AND DELICIOUS, 91 00:05:34,667 --> 00:05:38,200 I JUST WANT TO MAKE LOVE TO THEM WITH MY MOUTH. 92 00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:41,133 EXACTLY, IT'S LIKE A SEXUAL THING FOR ME, OBVIOUSLY. 93 00:05:44,667 --> 00:05:46,300 [ SIGHS ] 94 00:05:49,467 --> 00:05:52,733 I KNOW WHAT I'M DOING IS LITERALLY KILLING ME, 95 00:05:52,733 --> 00:05:54,733 BUT I CAN'T STOP. 96 00:05:54,733 --> 00:05:56,433 FOR THE LONGEST TIME, 97 00:05:56,433 --> 00:05:59,333 I FELT TOTALLY FINE ABOUT MY WEIGHT. 98 00:05:59,333 --> 00:06:02,700 I WAS ACTUALLY KIND OF PROUD OF IT. 99 00:06:02,700 --> 00:06:08,467 I GUESS AT ABOUT 19 YEARS OLD, I FOUND THE ORGANIZATION NAAFA, 100 00:06:08,467 --> 00:06:11,367 THE NATIONAL ASSOCIATION TO ADVANCE FAT ACCEPTANCE. 101 00:06:11,367 --> 00:06:14,067 AND THAT'S WHEN I DECIDED, YOU KNOW, 102 00:06:14,067 --> 00:06:16,200 "WHATEVER SIZE I AM, I'M JUST GONNA BE THIS SIZE. 103 00:06:16,200 --> 00:06:18,067 WHO CARES?" 104 00:06:18,067 --> 00:06:21,367 Bonnie: ZSALYNN AND I MET AT A NAAFA GATHERING. 105 00:06:21,367 --> 00:06:24,500 [ Chuckling ] I SAW HER AT THE POOL, WEARING A BIKINI. 106 00:06:24,500 --> 00:06:28,367 SHE WAS THE KIND OF GIRL THAT HER HAIR WAS ALWAYS DONE, 107 00:06:28,367 --> 00:06:29,900 HER NAILS WERE DONE. 108 00:06:29,900 --> 00:06:32,500 SHE WAS THE FAT-GIRL ROCK STAR. 109 00:06:32,500 --> 00:06:34,533 SHE WAS IMPRESSIVE. 110 00:06:34,533 --> 00:06:37,800 I FOUND THAT APPEALING IN A FRIEND. 111 00:06:37,800 --> 00:06:41,367 WE'VE STAYED GREAT FRIENDS EVEN THOUGH I'VE LOST THE WEIGHT. 112 00:06:41,367 --> 00:06:43,167 Zsalynn: WHEN YOU GO TO NAAFA, 113 00:06:43,167 --> 00:06:45,967 YOU MEET LOTS OF MEN FROM DIFFERENT COUNTRIES. 114 00:06:45,967 --> 00:06:49,567 IF THEY HAVE THE MEANS AND THEY WANT TO HANG OUT WITH YOU, 115 00:06:49,567 --> 00:06:51,900 THEN THEY'RE GONNA PAY YOUR WAY. 116 00:06:51,900 --> 00:06:54,067 I WAS STAYING IN 5-STAR HOTELS 117 00:06:54,067 --> 00:06:57,100 AND SKINNY-DIPPING IN THE MEDITERRANEAN. 118 00:06:57,100 --> 00:07:00,167 I'M HAVING THE TIME OF MY LIFE. 119 00:07:00,167 --> 00:07:02,667 I FELT LIKE MISS AMERICA. 120 00:07:02,667 --> 00:07:05,967 YOU KNOW, I HAD A CUTE LITTLE MATCHING PANTY-AND-BRA SET, 121 00:07:05,967 --> 00:07:08,600 SO I TOOK A PICTURE OF MYSELF IN IT, 122 00:07:08,600 --> 00:07:10,500 AND I PUT IT ON MY PROFILE. 123 00:07:10,500 --> 00:07:12,067 THAT'S WHEN I MET MY HUSBAND. 124 00:07:13,400 --> 00:07:16,067 Gareth: SHE LOOKED SO BIG AND COMFY 125 00:07:16,067 --> 00:07:17,633 AND SOFT AND SQUISHY. 126 00:07:17,633 --> 00:07:19,367 YOU KNOW, I LIKE BIG WOMEN, 127 00:07:19,367 --> 00:07:22,400 AND SHE WAS -- SHE WAS THEIR QUEEN AT THE TIME. 128 00:07:24,400 --> 00:07:28,067 Zsalynn: AT 29 YEARS OLD, I WAS 520 POUNDS. 129 00:07:28,067 --> 00:07:30,267 THAT'S A QUARTER OF A TON. 130 00:07:30,267 --> 00:07:35,767 MY WEIGHT WAS STARTING TO TAKE A TOLL ON MY HEALTH. 131 00:07:35,767 --> 00:07:39,667 I WENT FROM HAVING THIS AMAZING OUTLOOK ON LIFE 132 00:07:39,667 --> 00:07:45,500 TO THIS RECLUSIVE PERSON WHO DIDN'T LIKE HERSELF. 133 00:07:45,500 --> 00:07:48,100 I USED TO THINK AT NIGHT, 134 00:07:48,100 --> 00:07:51,767 "IF I DON'T WAKE UP, I'M OKAY WITH THAT." 135 00:07:51,767 --> 00:07:53,800 [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] 136 00:07:58,333 --> 00:08:00,233 Gareth: WHEN I FIRST MET ZSALYNN, 137 00:08:00,233 --> 00:08:02,633 IT WAS HER SIZE THAT ATTRACTED ME TO HER. 138 00:08:02,633 --> 00:08:04,367 BUT NOW SHE'S GOTTEN SO BIG, 139 00:08:04,367 --> 00:08:06,867 IT'S IMPOSSIBLE FOR US TO DO ANYTHING. 140 00:08:06,867 --> 00:08:10,200 AND I GUESS YOU JUST GOT TO BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR. 141 00:08:11,667 --> 00:08:13,667 Zsalynn: DRIVING IS A LITTLE DIFFICULT. 142 00:08:13,667 --> 00:08:15,067 I WENT FROM FIRST TO THIRD, 143 00:08:15,067 --> 00:08:18,167 'CAUSE SECOND DOESN'T REALLY FIT WITH MY THIGH. 144 00:08:20,667 --> 00:08:22,800 I NOW HAVE A MORE IMPORTANT REASON THAN JUST MYSELF 145 00:08:22,800 --> 00:08:23,900 TO GET HEALTHY. 146 00:08:23,900 --> 00:08:26,600 MY WEIGHT IS AFFECTING SOMEONE I LOVE. 147 00:08:26,600 --> 00:08:28,667 THERE SHE IS. 148 00:08:28,667 --> 00:08:30,867 [ VEHICLE DOOR CLOSES ] 149 00:08:30,867 --> 00:08:32,500 [ Voice breaking ] I HAVE A DAUGHTER NOW, 150 00:08:32,500 --> 00:08:34,400 AND I DON'T DO SOMETHING, SHE MAY NOT HAVE A MOM. 151 00:08:34,400 --> 00:08:36,067 SO, HOW WAS SCHOOL TODAY? 152 00:08:36,067 --> 00:08:37,733 GOOD. WHAT DID YOU DO? 153 00:08:37,733 --> 00:08:40,800 NOW WE'RE DOING STUFF ABOUT PLANTS. 154 00:08:42,500 --> 00:08:45,500 MY WEIGHT IS REALLY AFFECTING HER LIFE... 155 00:08:45,500 --> 00:08:47,567 [ PARKING BRAKE ENGAGES ] 156 00:08:47,567 --> 00:08:51,933 ...BUT I DON'T THINK SHE REALIZES HOW MUCH. 157 00:08:51,933 --> 00:08:54,367 THAT'S THE ABSOLUTE HARDEST PART. 158 00:08:56,867 --> 00:09:00,233 COME ON. [ LAUGHS ] 159 00:09:00,233 --> 00:09:01,633 I'M HANNAH'S MOTHER, 160 00:09:01,633 --> 00:09:05,267 BUT BONNIE'S ABLE TO DO ALL THE THINGS THAT I CAN'T DO. 161 00:09:05,267 --> 00:09:07,067 [ SPEAKING INDISTINCTLY ] 162 00:09:07,067 --> 00:09:09,933 SHE'S PRETTY MUCH RAISING HANNAH. 163 00:09:09,933 --> 00:09:11,433 [ BOTH LAUGH ] 164 00:09:11,433 --> 00:09:13,633 IT MAKES ME FEEL A LITTLE SAD 165 00:09:13,633 --> 00:09:17,233 'CAUSE MY MOM IS MISSING OUT ON SOME FUN STUFF. 166 00:09:17,233 --> 00:09:19,633 Bonnie: IT'S AN AIRPLANE. 167 00:09:19,633 --> 00:09:23,467 [ Voice breaking ] I'M SURE THAT SHE NEVER, EVER, EVER IMAGINED 168 00:09:23,467 --> 00:09:26,400 THAT SHE WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO BE THE KIND OF MOTHER 169 00:09:26,400 --> 00:09:29,133 THAT SHE ALWAYS WANTED TO BE FOR HER DAUGHTER. 170 00:09:29,133 --> 00:09:31,667 [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] 171 00:09:31,667 --> 00:09:36,300 I'M AFRAID THAT SHE'S GONNA DIE PREMATURELY. 172 00:09:39,500 --> 00:09:41,367 [ SIGHS ] 173 00:09:45,467 --> 00:09:47,633 UH, NO. 20 MINUTES. 174 00:09:47,633 --> 00:09:49,100 JUST LET ME KNOW WHEN IT'S READY. 175 00:09:49,100 --> 00:09:54,100 I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA BE DEAD WITHIN 5 YEARS. 176 00:09:54,100 --> 00:09:55,933 TELL ME WHEN. 177 00:09:55,933 --> 00:09:58,133 THAT'S A SOPHOMORE IN HIGH SCHOOL 178 00:09:58,133 --> 00:09:59,800 FOR MY DAUGHTER. 179 00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:01,767 I FEEL LIKE, IF I DIE, 180 00:10:01,767 --> 00:10:04,900 SHE'S GONNA BE THE ONE THAT SUFFERS MORE THAN ANYBODY. 181 00:10:04,900 --> 00:10:09,900 Gareth: IT WORRIES ME FOR MYSELF, BUT IF TERRIFIES ME FOR HANNAH. 182 00:10:09,900 --> 00:10:11,900 I DON'T EVEN LIKE TO THINK ABOUT IT, TO BE HONEST WITH YOU, 183 00:10:11,900 --> 00:10:13,567 BUT, I MEAN, IF ANYTHING DID HAPPEN TO ZSALYNN, 184 00:10:13,567 --> 00:10:16,467 I KNOW HANNAH WOULD BE DEVASTATED. 185 00:10:16,467 --> 00:10:19,333 MY DAUGHTER IS AN INNOCENT VICTIM IN THIS, 186 00:10:19,333 --> 00:10:21,800 AND SHE DOESN'T DESERVE IT. 187 00:10:21,800 --> 00:10:25,700 I WANT HER TO BE ABLE TO SEE THAT I CAN BE A GOOD PARENT. 188 00:10:25,700 --> 00:10:28,633 BUT SOMETHING IN MY LIFE HAS TO CHANGE. 189 00:10:32,700 --> 00:10:35,600 Zsalynn: MY WEIGHT HAS GOTTEN OUT OF CONTROL. 190 00:10:35,600 --> 00:10:38,900 I CAN'T CONTINUE LIVING LIKE THIS. 191 00:10:38,900 --> 00:10:41,067 I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING. 192 00:10:50,567 --> 00:10:52,800 I HAVE AN APPOINTMENT SCHEDULED TOMORROW 193 00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:55,600 WITH THE WEIGHT-LOSS SURGEON, AND I'M PRETTY NERVOUS. 194 00:10:55,600 --> 00:10:58,600 I'M NOT SURE WHAT HE'S GONNA SAY. 195 00:10:58,600 --> 00:11:00,400 [ GRUNTS ] 196 00:11:00,400 --> 00:11:01,633 [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] 197 00:11:06,133 --> 00:11:09,467 AND JUST GOING TO GET ONE LOAD OF CLOTHES FROM THE DRYER 198 00:11:09,467 --> 00:11:11,633 WIPES ME OUT. 199 00:11:17,833 --> 00:11:22,067 Zsalynn: I HAVEN'T BEEN ON A SCALE IN A VERY LONG TIME. 200 00:11:22,067 --> 00:11:26,200 SO, GETTING ON A SCALE IS GONNA BE PROBABLY A HUGE EYE-OPENER. 201 00:11:26,200 --> 00:11:28,367 I WANT TO KNOW AFFIRMATIVELY 202 00:11:28,367 --> 00:11:31,300 IF HE'S GOING TO PERFORM A SURGERY ON ME. 203 00:11:31,300 --> 00:11:33,533 IF HE SAYS NO, THAT I'M NOT A GOOD CANDIDATE, 204 00:11:33,533 --> 00:11:36,767 [Voice breaking] IT'S GONNA BE A LONG RIDE HOME. 205 00:11:38,333 --> 00:11:39,567 [ GRUNTS ] 206 00:11:39,567 --> 00:11:40,633 OKAY. 207 00:11:42,267 --> 00:11:44,567 Woman: MISS WHITWORTH? 208 00:11:44,567 --> 00:11:48,967 [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] 209 00:11:48,967 --> 00:11:50,700 [ SIGHS ] 210 00:11:50,700 --> 00:11:52,500 I DON'T WANT TO KNOW. 211 00:11:53,900 --> 00:11:57,533 YOU CAN STEP OFF. 212 00:11:57,533 --> 00:11:59,533 OKAY. 213 00:11:59,533 --> 00:12:02,100 Dr. Nowzaradan: HEY. HOW ARE YOU? 214 00:12:02,100 --> 00:12:03,667 I'M OKAY. HOW ABOUT YOU? 215 00:12:03,667 --> 00:12:04,933 I'M FINE, THANK YOU. 216 00:12:04,933 --> 00:12:07,300 I'M DR. NOWZARADAN. ALL RIGHT. 217 00:12:07,300 --> 00:12:11,633 SO, WHAT DO YOU THINK IS CAUSING YOU TO BE ALMOST 600? 218 00:12:11,633 --> 00:12:13,233 I DIDN'T LOOK AT THE SCALE. 219 00:12:13,233 --> 00:12:14,433 THAT'S WHY. 220 00:12:14,433 --> 00:12:15,433 SO... 221 00:12:15,433 --> 00:12:17,400 I'M A SUGARHOLIC. 222 00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:19,067 SUGAR IS MY DRUG OF CHOICE. 223 00:12:19,067 --> 00:12:21,900 HOW DO LOOK THAT SURGERY'S GONNA CHANGE THAT? 224 00:12:21,900 --> 00:12:24,100 YOU'RE GONNA TAKE OUT MY INTESTINES, 225 00:12:24,100 --> 00:12:26,433 AND THE SECOND SUGAR HITS MY INTESTINE, 226 00:12:26,433 --> 00:12:27,800 I'M GONNA BE VERY SICK. 227 00:12:27,800 --> 00:12:29,300 YOU'RE GONNA TO HAVE 228 00:12:29,300 --> 00:12:32,233 SOME REALISTIC EXPECTATION FROM SURGERY. 229 00:12:32,233 --> 00:12:34,200 ALL THE SURGERY IS GONNA DO FOR YOU -- 230 00:12:34,200 --> 00:12:37,067 KEEP YOU FROM EATING A LOT AT ONE TIME. 231 00:12:37,067 --> 00:12:38,567 HOW MANY TIMES YOU'RE GONNA EAT 232 00:12:38,567 --> 00:12:40,333 AND WHAT KIND OF FOOD YOU'RE GONNA EAT 233 00:12:40,333 --> 00:12:44,067 IS GONNA BE THE KEY ISSUE TO MAKE SURGERY BE SUCCESSFUL. 234 00:12:44,067 --> 00:12:45,133 OKAY. 235 00:12:45,133 --> 00:12:47,100 IF YOU HAVE A FALSE HOPE 236 00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:49,533 THAT SURGERY IS GONNA KEEP YOU FROM EATING SUGAR, 237 00:12:49,533 --> 00:12:51,733 NO, THAT'S NOT GONNA HAPPEN. 238 00:12:54,067 --> 00:12:55,767 AS MANY AS I CAN. 239 00:12:55,767 --> 00:12:58,567 LIKE, YOU KNOW, I FEEL LIKE I HAVE A HOLE IN MY SOUL, 240 00:12:58,567 --> 00:13:00,867 AND I'M TRYING TO FILL IT UP WITH SUGAR. 241 00:13:00,867 --> 00:13:04,133 I SEE. 242 00:13:10,967 --> 00:13:13,933 I NEED TO MAKE SURE SHE UNDERSTANDS 243 00:13:13,933 --> 00:13:17,133 WHAT IT'S GONNA TAKE FOR HER TO GET READY FOR SURGERY. 244 00:13:17,133 --> 00:13:19,533 ZSALYNN, YOU NEED TO GET READY 245 00:13:19,533 --> 00:13:22,533 BY LOSING SOME WEIGHT ON YOUR OWN FIRST. 246 00:13:22,533 --> 00:13:26,167 I NEED TO SEE YOU LOSE AT LEAST 20 TO 30 POUNDS. 247 00:13:26,167 --> 00:13:29,067 YOU HAVE TO CUT THE CALORIE COUNT DOWN. 248 00:13:29,067 --> 00:13:31,533 BUT THE KEY ISSUE WITH IT WILL BE 249 00:13:31,533 --> 00:13:34,067 THAT YOU ONLY EAT TWO OR THREE TIMES A DAY, 250 00:13:34,067 --> 00:13:37,100 NO SNACK IN BETWEEN. 251 00:13:37,100 --> 00:13:39,433 IF YOU DON'T ADJUST YOUR MIND-SET, 252 00:13:39,433 --> 00:13:42,833 THIS BYPASS IS GONNA FAIL. 253 00:13:42,833 --> 00:13:44,200 OKAY. OKAY? 254 00:13:44,200 --> 00:13:45,533 AND WE'LL DO THAT, 255 00:13:45,533 --> 00:13:47,867 AND WE'LL SEE HOW YOU DO ABOUT TWO, THREE WEEKS. 256 00:13:47,867 --> 00:13:49,500 THANK YOU. MM-HMM. 257 00:13:54,500 --> 00:13:56,900 WELL, HE SHOULD BE HARD 258 00:13:56,900 --> 00:14:00,167 SO THAT YOU KNOW IT'S GONNA BE REALLY HARD. 259 00:14:00,167 --> 00:14:02,433 WE'RE NOT JUST GONNA LEAVE YOU OUT THERE, 260 00:14:02,433 --> 00:14:03,533 HANGING BY YOURSELF. 261 00:14:03,533 --> 00:14:05,333 WE'RE GONNA HELP YOU, ZSALYNN. 262 00:14:07,367 --> 00:14:10,533 Zsalynn: I THINK, AT THIS SIZE, I COULD DIE ANY DAY NOW. 263 00:14:10,533 --> 00:14:12,633 I MEAN, I COULD DROP DEAD FROM A HEART ATTACK. 264 00:14:15,433 --> 00:14:18,233 I'VE WAITED TOO LONG TO DEAL WITH THIS PROBLEM, 265 00:14:18,233 --> 00:14:20,333 SO I HAVE TO DO IT. 266 00:14:20,333 --> 00:14:22,200 THIS IS MY LAST CHANCE. 267 00:14:27,167 --> 00:14:28,900 Zsalynn: HERE, GIVE ME A HAND-UP. 268 00:14:28,900 --> 00:14:32,533 EE-HEE! THANK YOU. ONE, TWO, THREE, PULL. 269 00:14:32,533 --> 00:14:34,167 THANK YOU. 270 00:14:34,167 --> 00:14:35,933 STARTING TODAY, 271 00:14:35,933 --> 00:14:41,067 I HAVE TO CHANGE EVERYTHING ABOUT EVERYTHING. 272 00:14:41,067 --> 00:14:43,267 I CAN'T DO WHAT I WANT TO DO. 273 00:14:43,267 --> 00:14:45,233 I'VE MISSED OUT ON SO MUCH. 274 00:14:45,233 --> 00:14:49,100 I WANT THAT TO STOP, AND I WANT THINGS TO CHANGE. 275 00:14:49,100 --> 00:14:52,367 SO, YOU WANT ME TO LET YOU WALK ALL THE WAY OVER THERE, 276 00:14:52,367 --> 00:14:53,633 THEN I'M GONNA DRIVE 277 00:14:53,633 --> 00:14:55,600 AND I'M JUST GONNA WATCH YOU THROUGH THE FENCE? 278 00:14:55,600 --> 00:14:56,900 YES. YOU'RE OKAY WITH THAT? 279 00:14:56,900 --> 00:14:58,200 SURE. 280 00:14:58,200 --> 00:14:59,900 YOU GONNA WALK WITH THEM, AMY? 281 00:14:59,900 --> 00:15:01,333 YEAH, SURE. 282 00:15:01,333 --> 00:15:02,367 Zsalynn: THANK YOU. 283 00:15:02,367 --> 00:15:03,767 YOU'RE WELCOME. OF COURSE. 284 00:15:03,767 --> 00:15:07,167 HANNAH, WALK SLOW, PLEASE. IT'S NOT A RACE. 285 00:15:07,167 --> 00:15:09,067 Zsalynn: I'M TIRED OF HAVING TO RELY ON OTHER PEOPLE 286 00:15:09,067 --> 00:15:12,267 TO DO THE THINGS THAT I WANT TO DO. 287 00:15:12,267 --> 00:15:13,700 I CAN'T EVEN WALK AROUND THE GATE 288 00:15:13,700 --> 00:15:15,400 TO GET INTO HANNAH'S FAVORITE PLAYGROUND. 289 00:15:15,400 --> 00:15:17,500 THIS IS THE MAIN PLAYGROUND, SEE? 290 00:15:17,500 --> 00:15:19,567 PEOPLE WILL COME OUT HERE, AND THEY'D RIDE THEIR BIKES. 291 00:15:19,567 --> 00:15:20,900 THERE'S A WHOLE BUNCH OF SWINGS. 292 00:15:20,900 --> 00:15:23,100 THERE'S LIKE 18 OR SOMETHING. 293 00:15:23,100 --> 00:15:26,700 Zsalynn: I'VE MISSED OUT ON SO MUCH OF MY DAUGHTER'S CHILDHOOD. 294 00:15:26,700 --> 00:15:28,900 I NEED TO DO THIS FOR HER. 295 00:15:28,900 --> 00:15:30,867 COME ON, LET'S SWING. 296 00:15:32,533 --> 00:15:34,433 Amy: LOOK, YOUR MAMA'S COMING. 297 00:15:34,433 --> 00:15:36,367 MOMMY! 298 00:15:39,600 --> 00:15:41,900 Zsalynn: ARE YOU HAVING FUN, HANNAH? 299 00:15:41,900 --> 00:15:43,767 YES! LOTS! 300 00:15:43,767 --> 00:15:45,100 CAN YOU DO THIS ONE? 301 00:15:45,100 --> 00:15:48,500 HANNAH SAYS IT DOESN'T BOTHER HER, BUT I KNOW IT DOES. 302 00:15:48,500 --> 00:15:49,800 Girl: WHERE ARE YOU GOING? 303 00:15:49,800 --> 00:15:51,067 YOU DON'T NEED TO COME OVER HERE. 304 00:15:51,067 --> 00:15:52,467 I KNOW. 305 00:15:52,467 --> 00:15:53,800 YOU CAN JUST GO AND SWING. 306 00:15:53,800 --> 00:15:56,167 I KNOW. 307 00:15:56,167 --> 00:15:57,800 [ Voice breaking ] I FEEL LIKE 308 00:15:57,800 --> 00:16:01,067 MY WEIGHT IS COSTING HER A NORMAL CHILDHOOD. 309 00:16:01,067 --> 00:16:02,700 I KNOW I HAVE TO PICK 310 00:16:02,700 --> 00:16:05,667 BETWEEN BEING THERE FOR HER AND MY ADDICTION, 311 00:16:05,667 --> 00:16:08,267 BUT I BELIEVE I CAN DO IT. 312 00:16:15,500 --> 00:16:17,867 Woman: MISS ZSALYNN? 313 00:16:20,633 --> 00:16:24,333 I'M NOT GONNA LIE. THE PAST MONTH HAS BEEN TOUGH. 314 00:16:24,333 --> 00:16:28,833 BUT I'M EXCITED TO SEE IF ALL MY HARD WORK HAS PAID OFF 315 00:16:28,833 --> 00:16:31,900 AND I CAN FINALLY GET MY SURGERY. 316 00:16:31,900 --> 00:16:34,967 YEAH. THAT'S REALLY AWESOME. 317 00:16:34,967 --> 00:16:36,067 [ LAUGHS ] 318 00:16:36,067 --> 00:16:37,900 I'M REALLY EXCITED. 319 00:16:37,900 --> 00:16:39,967 YOU DID GOOD. THANK YOU. 320 00:16:39,967 --> 00:16:41,533 [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] 321 00:16:41,533 --> 00:16:45,233 HELLO. HI, DR. NOWZARADAN. 322 00:16:45,233 --> 00:16:48,167 I SEE YOU LOST A FEW POUNDS, HUH? 323 00:16:48,167 --> 00:16:53,067 ANY DIFFICULTY WITH YOUR DIET OR ANYTHING LIKE THAT? 324 00:16:53,067 --> 00:16:54,567 NOPE. SUPER. 325 00:16:54,567 --> 00:16:58,900 Dr. Nowzaradan: ZSALYNN DID OKAY TODAY. 326 00:16:58,900 --> 00:17:02,733 SHE'S PROVEN THAT SHE CAN CONTROL HER EATING HABIT. 327 00:17:02,733 --> 00:17:05,067 I THINK SHE'S READY TO MOVE FORWARD 328 00:17:05,067 --> 00:17:06,233 AND GET WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY. 329 00:17:06,233 --> 00:17:08,200 WE'RE ON RIGHT TRACK, 330 00:17:08,200 --> 00:17:11,667 AND WE'RE GONNA MAKE PROGRESS AND GET YOU READY FOR SURGERY. 331 00:17:11,667 --> 00:17:13,467 OKAY. OKAY? ALL RIGHT. 332 00:17:13,467 --> 00:17:15,633 THAT MAKES ME HAPPY. THANK YOU. 333 00:17:15,633 --> 00:17:17,067 ALL RIGHT, WE'LL SEE YOU, THEN. 334 00:17:17,067 --> 00:17:19,567 Zsalynn: THIS IS SO EXCITING. 335 00:17:19,567 --> 00:17:23,233 I'M SO PROUD OF MYSELF RIGHT NOW. 336 00:17:32,500 --> 00:17:35,833 YOU DON'T NEED TO TAKE YOUR BIG SUITCASE. 337 00:17:37,200 --> 00:17:40,600 SO, THIS IS IT. TOMORROW'S THE DAY. 338 00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:43,567 I AM GOING TO HAVE WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY. 339 00:17:43,567 --> 00:17:46,233 IT REALLY DID COME UP REALLY FAST. 340 00:17:46,233 --> 00:17:47,567 SO, IS THIS THE STUFF YOU'RE BRINGING? 341 00:17:47,567 --> 00:17:48,667 YEP. 342 00:17:48,667 --> 00:17:49,933 YESTERDAY MORNING, 343 00:17:49,933 --> 00:17:53,467 I TOLD GARETH THAT SURGERY WAS ON WEDNESDAY. 344 00:17:53,467 --> 00:17:57,333 HE'S BEEN TELLING ME HE'S BEHIND ME WITH THIS SURGERY, 345 00:17:57,333 --> 00:17:59,133 BUT I DON'T THINK HE ACTUALLY THOUGHT 346 00:17:59,133 --> 00:18:00,600 I WAS GONNA GO THROUGH WITH IT. 347 00:18:00,600 --> 00:18:02,567 PAJAMAS? CHECK. 348 00:18:02,567 --> 00:18:04,600 HE SAYS, "I MARRIED YOU 10 YEARS AGO, 349 00:18:04,600 --> 00:18:06,233 "WHEN YOU WERE A HAPPY FAT GIRL, 350 00:18:06,233 --> 00:18:08,533 "AND I WAS HAPPY TO MARRY A HAPPY FAT GIRL. 351 00:18:08,533 --> 00:18:10,067 "IF YOU'D HAVE TOLD ME 10 YEARS AGO 352 00:18:10,067 --> 00:18:11,533 "I WAS MARRYING AN UNHAPPY FAT GIRL, 353 00:18:11,533 --> 00:18:13,167 THEN MAYBE I WOULDN'T HAVE MARRIED YOU." 354 00:18:13,167 --> 00:18:15,633 IT'S REALLY HARD TO TALK ABOUT GARETH, 355 00:18:15,633 --> 00:18:19,767 'CAUSE, YOU KNOW, HE -- HE WANTS A FAT WIFE. 356 00:18:19,767 --> 00:18:23,900 HE WANTS WHAT HE'S PHYSICALLY ATTRACTED TO. 357 00:18:23,900 --> 00:18:26,767 THAT'S WHAT HE WANTS. 358 00:18:26,767 --> 00:18:30,933 HE HAS A PHYSICAL PREFERENCE FOR HIS SEXUAL NEEDS 359 00:18:30,933 --> 00:18:36,067 THAT REQUIRES ME TO BE BIGGER THAN, YOU KNOW, JUST FAT. 360 00:18:36,067 --> 00:18:38,667 I REALIZE I'VE BEEN TELLING MYSELF A LIE, 361 00:18:38,667 --> 00:18:40,400 AND THAT LIE WAS KILLING ME. 362 00:18:40,400 --> 00:18:42,533 BIG CAN'T BE BEAUTIFUL 363 00:18:42,533 --> 00:18:45,567 WHEN IT MEANS MY DAUGHTER MAY NOT HAVE A MOTHER. 364 00:18:49,200 --> 00:18:55,700 HE HAS NO IDEA HOW CLOSE TO DEATH I FEEL EVERY DAY. 365 00:18:55,700 --> 00:18:58,433 WITHOUT THIS SURGERY, 366 00:18:58,433 --> 00:19:01,567 I'M GONNA DIE SOONER, RATHER THAN LATER. 367 00:19:01,567 --> 00:19:03,067 [ Voice breaking ] WITH SURGERY, 368 00:19:03,067 --> 00:19:05,367 I'LL BE WALKING AND MOVING AND GOING. 369 00:19:05,367 --> 00:19:07,800 YOU KNOW, HE TALKS ABOUT [SIGHS] 370 00:19:07,800 --> 00:19:11,967 IT'S NOT THAT HE WILL NOT BE SEXUALLY ATTRACTED TO ME, 371 00:19:11,967 --> 00:19:15,767 IT'S THAT I'LL BE REPULSIVE TO HIM. 372 00:19:15,767 --> 00:19:17,700 I MEAN, I'M A LITTLE BIT SAD 373 00:19:17,700 --> 00:19:20,467 'CAUSE, YOU KNOW, I LIKE BIGGER WOMEN, 374 00:19:20,467 --> 00:19:23,867 SO IT'S A LITTLE UPSETTING TO LOSE WHAT YOU LIKE. 375 00:19:23,867 --> 00:19:26,733 BUT, YOU KNOW, GONNA HAVE TO GET OVER IT. 376 00:19:26,733 --> 00:19:29,100 WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SUCH A NEGATIVE NANCY? 377 00:19:29,100 --> 00:19:30,933 [ Chuckling ] WE'LL SEE. 378 00:19:30,933 --> 00:19:33,567 LET'S HOPE IT DOESN'T TURN 'ROUND TO BITE US IN THE BUTT. 379 00:19:33,567 --> 00:19:35,800 I'VE ALWAYS LIKED BIGGER WOMEN, YOU KNOW? 380 00:19:35,800 --> 00:19:38,067 WHY SETTLE FOR A HOT DOG WHEN YOU CAN HAVE A STEAK? 381 00:19:38,067 --> 00:19:40,067 Zsalynn: WE'RE GOING NOW. ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. 382 00:19:40,067 --> 00:19:43,533 I DON'T KNOW WHAT THE FUTURE HOLDS, GOOD OR BAD. 383 00:19:43,533 --> 00:19:46,233 THIS IS GONNA BE HARD TO GET IN AND OUT OF. 384 00:19:46,233 --> 00:19:48,167 [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] 385 00:19:48,167 --> 00:19:50,433 [ GRUNTS ] 386 00:19:50,433 --> 00:19:53,333 BUT I KNOW THAT I'M MAKING THE RIGHT DECISION 387 00:19:53,333 --> 00:19:54,700 FOR MY DAUGHTER AND I. 388 00:19:54,700 --> 00:19:56,067 OH! 389 00:19:56,067 --> 00:19:58,067 I'LL DO IT. 390 00:19:58,067 --> 00:20:02,333 GARETH ISN'T READY FOR ME TO START THIS JOURNEY, 391 00:20:02,333 --> 00:20:04,967 BUT IF I DON'T DO SOMETHING DRASTIC, 392 00:20:04,967 --> 00:20:06,267 I'M GONNA BE DEAD 393 00:20:06,267 --> 00:20:09,233 AND HE'S GONNA BE RAISING A 9-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER 394 00:20:09,233 --> 00:20:10,967 ALL BY HIMSELF. 395 00:20:23,167 --> 00:20:25,300 Woman: WE'RE DOING A LAPAROSCOPIC PROCEDURE 396 00:20:25,300 --> 00:20:28,167 ON YOUR ABDOMEN, REMOVING PART OF YOUR STOMACH. 397 00:20:28,167 --> 00:20:29,867 SO, YOU OKAY, SWEETIE? 398 00:20:29,867 --> 00:20:31,500 [ SNIFFLES ] YEAH. YOU SURE? 399 00:20:31,500 --> 00:20:33,400 WE'RE GONNA TAKE REALLY GOOD CARE OF YOU, OKAY? 400 00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:35,700 I HAVE AN 8-YEAR-OLD DAUGHTER, 401 00:20:35,700 --> 00:20:40,200 AND, YOU KNOW, WHAT IF I DIE, AND THEN SHE'S MOTHERLESS? 402 00:20:42,300 --> 00:20:44,167 Zsalynn: I WISH GARETH WAS HERE. 403 00:20:44,167 --> 00:20:47,233 SOMETIMES I WISH HE WAS A DIFFERENT PERSON 404 00:20:47,233 --> 00:20:49,033 AND COULD BE HERE FOR ME. 405 00:20:49,033 --> 00:20:51,333 HELLO! 406 00:20:51,333 --> 00:20:53,900 LOOK AT ME IN MY FANCY HAT. 407 00:20:53,900 --> 00:20:55,400 I LOVE YOU. 408 00:20:55,400 --> 00:20:57,100 I LOVE YOU, TOO. 409 00:20:59,367 --> 00:21:04,267 I KNOW SURGERY IS RISKY, BUT NOT HAVING IT IS RISKIER. 410 00:21:04,267 --> 00:21:05,967 BYE. BYE. 411 00:21:05,967 --> 00:21:08,933 I'M -- I'M SO SCARED. 412 00:21:08,933 --> 00:21:11,767 Bonnie: I'M NOT HERE TO MAKE YOU CRY. 413 00:21:11,767 --> 00:21:13,567 I KNOW. OKAY. 414 00:21:15,367 --> 00:21:18,800 WE'LL COME SEE YOU WHEN YOU COME BACK FROM SLEEPY LAND. 415 00:21:18,800 --> 00:21:21,267 Zsalynn: IF YOU DIE, YOU DIE. I MEAN, THAT'S A FACT OF LIFE. 416 00:21:21,267 --> 00:21:22,967 EVERYBODY HAS A TIME. 417 00:21:22,967 --> 00:21:27,700 BUT I JUST WORRY ABOUT HANNAH. 418 00:21:27,700 --> 00:21:30,967 I JUST WANT HER TO HAVE A BETTER LIFE... 419 00:21:30,967 --> 00:21:32,300 [SNIFFLES] 420 00:21:32,300 --> 00:21:33,900 ...A MOTHER WHO CAN WALK WITH HER 421 00:21:33,900 --> 00:21:35,567 AND BE WITH HER AND PLAY WITH HER. 422 00:21:38,233 --> 00:21:43,167 SO I HAVE TO COME THROUGH THIS SURGERY WITH FLYING COLORS. 423 00:21:51,567 --> 00:21:55,533 USUALLY, THIS TYPE OF SURGERY IS MUCH MORE DIFFICULT 424 00:21:55,533 --> 00:21:58,900 IN PATIENTS THAT ARE VERY HEAVY -- 425 00:21:58,900 --> 00:22:02,433 LIKE, ZSALYNN IS ALMOST 600 POUNDS. 426 00:22:02,433 --> 00:22:05,833 SO, HER SURGERY IS GONNA BE A LITTLE BIT CHALLENGING. 427 00:22:10,300 --> 00:22:13,867 THE GASTRIC BYPASS IS A GOOD TREATMENT 428 00:22:13,867 --> 00:22:16,767 FOR THESE PEOPLE THAT ARE MORBIDLY OBESE. 429 00:22:16,767 --> 00:22:18,067 GO FORWARD. 430 00:22:32,600 --> 00:22:34,533 Bonnie: ARE THESE PENCILS OR MARKERS? 431 00:22:34,533 --> 00:22:36,700 LET'S TRY THE BROWN. OKAY. 432 00:22:36,700 --> 00:22:38,367 Bonnie: I'M AFRAID. 433 00:22:38,367 --> 00:22:40,200 I KNOW IT'S A MAJOR SURGERY. 434 00:22:40,200 --> 00:22:45,300 I JUST WANT THE RISK OF HAVING THE SURGERY TO BE WORTH IT. 435 00:22:45,300 --> 00:22:48,267 ALL RIGHT, THAT LOOKS GOOD. 436 00:22:48,267 --> 00:22:51,467 I WANT HER TO BE AS SUCCESSFUL AS SHE CAN, 437 00:22:51,467 --> 00:22:53,233 AND I WANT HER TO GET HER LIFE BACK AGAIN. 438 00:22:55,100 --> 00:22:57,367 Dr. Nowzaradan: ZSALYNN DID VERY WELL, 439 00:22:57,367 --> 00:23:00,067 AND WE'RE ABLE TO DO THE BYPASS ON HER. 440 00:23:00,067 --> 00:23:03,233 IT WAS A LITTLE BIT DIFFICULT BECAUSE OF HER SIZE. 441 00:23:03,233 --> 00:23:05,400 [ INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS ] 442 00:23:10,267 --> 00:23:12,467 YOU CAN GIVE HER A LITTLE RUB RIGHT THERE. 443 00:23:12,467 --> 00:23:13,633 YOU WON'T HURT HER. 444 00:23:13,633 --> 00:23:15,067 HI, MOM. 445 00:23:16,400 --> 00:23:20,333 YOU OKAY? MM-HMM. 446 00:23:20,333 --> 00:23:22,767 SHE'S OKAY, HON. 447 00:23:22,767 --> 00:23:24,167 [ CHUCKLES ] 448 00:23:24,167 --> 00:23:28,433 I PROMISE SHE IS. SHE'S JUST SLEEPY. 449 00:23:28,433 --> 00:23:30,267 DO YOU WANT TO GO OUT AND WALK FOR A LITTLE BIT? 450 00:23:30,267 --> 00:23:32,900 YEAH, OKAY, LET'S GO. 451 00:23:32,900 --> 00:23:34,500 AND IF YOU NEED A SNACK OR A DRINK, 452 00:23:34,500 --> 00:23:36,167 THERE'S VENDING MACHINES RIGHT THERE. 453 00:23:36,167 --> 00:23:37,600 YOU WERE REALLY, REALLY BRAVE 454 00:23:37,600 --> 00:23:38,933 ALL DAY LONG TODAY, HANNAH. 455 00:23:38,933 --> 00:23:44,300 YEAH, WE'RE JUST REALLY RELIEVED SHE'S OKAY. 456 00:23:52,333 --> 00:23:54,800 ROOM SERVICE. 457 00:24:10,500 --> 00:24:12,833 Zsalynn: MY APPETITE IS A LITTLE LESS, 458 00:24:12,833 --> 00:24:14,433 BUT I STILL WANT TO EAT. 459 00:24:16,500 --> 00:24:20,833 I'M SURPRISED THE FOOD CRAVINGS ARE STILL HERE. 460 00:24:20,833 --> 00:24:24,500 BUT I HAVE TO DO THIS. 461 00:24:24,500 --> 00:24:28,967 I JUST WANT TO GET UP AND WALK. 462 00:24:30,800 --> 00:24:32,667 Bonnie: WOW. 463 00:24:32,667 --> 00:24:35,067 CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? 464 00:24:35,067 --> 00:24:38,567 [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] 465 00:24:38,567 --> 00:24:42,300 WHAT IS GOING ON WITH THAT? 466 00:24:42,300 --> 00:24:45,867 YOU ARE BURNING UP RUBBER UP THERE. 467 00:24:45,867 --> 00:24:48,833 I DID NOT THINK YOU'D BE MOVING ALONG LIKE THAT. 468 00:24:48,833 --> 00:24:51,133 [ CELLPHONE RINGS ] 469 00:24:55,400 --> 00:24:56,733 IS IT DAD? IT'S DAD. 470 00:24:56,733 --> 00:24:58,233 DO YOU WANT TO TALK TO HIM? 471 00:24:58,233 --> 00:24:59,700 NO WAY. 472 00:24:59,700 --> 00:25:02,733 Zsalynn: I HAVEN'T TALKED TO MY HUSBAND SINCE SURGERY, 473 00:25:02,733 --> 00:25:05,533 AND I DON'T KNOW IF HE'S GONNA BE SUPPORTIVE 474 00:25:05,533 --> 00:25:07,400 OR IF HE'S JUST NOT. 475 00:25:07,400 --> 00:25:08,833 HELLO? 476 00:25:11,133 --> 00:25:14,067 OH, MY GOD, I'M SO HAPPY YOU ASKED. 477 00:25:14,067 --> 00:25:15,667 I'VE LOST 78 POUNDS. 478 00:25:17,700 --> 00:25:20,133 SO, YOU'RE SICK? WHY DIDN'T YOU GO TO WORK? 479 00:25:25,633 --> 00:25:29,100 OKAY. ON THAT NOTE, I'M GONNA GO AHEAD AND GO. 480 00:25:29,100 --> 00:25:30,500 I'LL TALK TO YOU LATER. 481 00:25:30,500 --> 00:25:34,567 ALL RIGHT. TALK TO YOU LATER. 482 00:25:34,567 --> 00:25:37,467 Zsalynn: I HOPE MY HUSBAND WILL REALIZE THAT I MIGHT NEED HIM 483 00:25:37,467 --> 00:25:40,433 AND I MIGHT NEED HIS SUPPORT TO DO THIS. 484 00:25:40,433 --> 00:25:43,200 I DON'T NEED TO HEAR ABOUT WHAT THEY HAD FOR DINNER. 485 00:25:43,200 --> 00:25:44,267 I'M SCARED. 486 00:25:44,267 --> 00:25:45,733 OH, I LOVE YOU, PUMPKIN BEAR. 487 00:25:45,733 --> 00:25:47,433 I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN. 488 00:25:47,433 --> 00:25:48,967 LOVE YOU. LOVE YOU, TOO. 489 00:25:55,933 --> 00:25:58,333 GARETH INSISTED ON PICKING ME UP TODAY, 490 00:25:58,333 --> 00:26:00,800 AND OF COURSE, HE'S GONNA BE LATE. 491 00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:04,233 ASKED HIM TO BE HERE AT 11:00, 492 00:26:04,233 --> 00:26:08,200 BUT AT 8:45, HE STILL HADN'T LEFT HOME YET. 493 00:26:08,200 --> 00:26:11,267 [ Voice breaking ] I KNOW SOMEWHERE INSIDE OF HIS HEART 494 00:26:11,267 --> 00:26:13,200 HE MUST CARE. 495 00:26:13,200 --> 00:26:15,867 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 496 00:26:15,867 --> 00:26:17,500 YEAH. 497 00:26:21,967 --> 00:26:24,467 WELL, I'M SORRY TO DISAPPOINT YOU, 498 00:26:24,467 --> 00:26:26,700 BUT I HAVEN'T LOST 75 POUNDS. 499 00:26:34,933 --> 00:26:36,733 I DON'T THINK GARETH 500 00:26:36,733 --> 00:26:39,267 IS GONNA BE SOMEONE WHO'S GOING TO HELP ME. 501 00:26:39,267 --> 00:26:42,400 GOODBYE. TAKE CARE. ALL RIGHT. 502 00:26:52,967 --> 00:26:54,733 [ SMOOCHES ] 503 00:27:02,533 --> 00:27:06,567 I'M NOT EVEN A LITTLE BIT TEMPTED. 504 00:27:08,500 --> 00:27:11,633 IF HE'S GOING TO GO AHEAD AND TRY AND TEMPT ME LIKE THIS, 505 00:27:11,633 --> 00:27:13,867 IT'S HURTFUL. 506 00:27:13,867 --> 00:27:16,267 IT'S A LITTLE BIT NAUSEATING, TO BE HONEST. 507 00:27:17,900 --> 00:27:19,933 I THINK I MARRIED A JERK, 508 00:27:19,933 --> 00:27:23,467 BUT I THINK HE DOESN'T KNOW ANY OTHER WAY. 509 00:27:25,500 --> 00:27:27,967 I DON'T KNOW IF I'M GONNA HAVE GARETH'S SUPPORT, 510 00:27:27,967 --> 00:27:30,767 BUT I CAN'T TURN BACK NOW. 511 00:27:35,133 --> 00:27:40,733 Zsalynn: THIS IS REALLY HARD. CHANGE IS HARD. 512 00:27:40,733 --> 00:27:44,167 CHANGING IS A WORK IN PROGRESS. 513 00:27:56,933 --> 00:27:58,467 OVER THE PAST MONTH, 514 00:27:58,467 --> 00:28:01,633 I'VE BEEN TRYING TO ADJUST TO A NEW DIET. 515 00:28:01,633 --> 00:28:03,567 IT'S NOT BEEN EASY. 516 00:28:03,567 --> 00:28:07,733 I NEED TO HAVE A LOT OF PROTEIN, AND EGGS HAVE A LOT OF PROTEIN. 517 00:28:09,633 --> 00:28:13,867 MY APPETITE IS A LITTLE LESS, BUT I STILL WANT TO EAT. 518 00:28:13,867 --> 00:28:16,633 AND I'M SUPPOSED TO BE EATING RUNNY EGGS STILL 519 00:28:16,633 --> 00:28:20,067 BUT I WOULDN'T EVEN ATTEMPT TO EAT A RUNNY EGG. 520 00:28:20,067 --> 00:28:22,900 NOT EVEN IF I EAT SOMETHING BAD, 521 00:28:22,900 --> 00:28:27,500 MY STOMACH HURTS, I FEEL NAUSEATED. 522 00:28:27,500 --> 00:28:31,933 I THOUGHT MY BIGGEST CHALLENGE WOULD BE OVEREATING. 523 00:28:38,367 --> 00:28:41,433 DEFINITELY, THE BIGGEST CHALLENGE SO FAR 524 00:28:41,433 --> 00:28:44,067 IS JUST EATING THREE TIMES A DAY. 525 00:28:44,067 --> 00:28:47,167 FOOD WAS MY COMFORT AND MY FRIEND, 526 00:28:47,167 --> 00:28:49,733 AND NOW IT'S JUST FOR SURVIVAL. 527 00:28:49,733 --> 00:28:52,400 I THINK I'VE HAD ABOUT ALL I CAN HAVE. 528 00:28:52,400 --> 00:28:55,733 IT'S SO STRANGE WHEN YOUR WHOLE RELATIONSHIP WITH FOOD 529 00:28:55,733 --> 00:28:58,500 IS TURNED UPSIDE DOWN, 530 00:28:58,500 --> 00:29:01,467 BUT I'M TAKING IT ONE STEP AT A TIME. 531 00:29:12,133 --> 00:29:16,067 SINCE THE SURGERY, PROBABLY AT LEAST ONCE A WEEK, 532 00:29:16,067 --> 00:29:19,133 I HAVE A BREAKDOWN WHERE I JUST CRY 533 00:29:19,133 --> 00:29:21,967 BECAUSE I MISS MY OLD FRIEND SUGAR. 534 00:29:21,967 --> 00:29:23,800 AND THEN I GET OVER IT, 535 00:29:23,800 --> 00:29:27,500 'CAUSE THE CHOICE I MADE WAS BEST FOR ME. 536 00:29:36,333 --> 00:29:37,600 HELLO. 537 00:29:37,600 --> 00:29:38,833 HI. 538 00:29:39,967 --> 00:29:43,967 LET'S SEE, HOW IS YOUR SCAR AND INCISION DOING? 539 00:29:43,967 --> 00:29:47,700 UM, ALL OF THEM LOOK GOOD. 540 00:29:47,700 --> 00:29:50,433 HOW IS YOUR DIET COMING ALONG? 541 00:29:50,433 --> 00:29:52,733 UM, MY DIET -- I REALLY HATE TO EAT. 542 00:29:52,733 --> 00:29:54,467 NOTHING TASTES GOOD. 543 00:29:54,467 --> 00:29:58,333 I'VE BEEN EATING COTTAGE CHEESE, YOGURT, AND SOUP. 544 00:29:58,333 --> 00:30:00,933 Dr. Nowzaradan: ZSALYNN IS MAKING SOME DECENT PROGRESS. 545 00:30:00,933 --> 00:30:04,133 SHE HAS LOST 150 POUNDS FOR HER FIRST FEW MONTHS, 546 00:30:04,133 --> 00:30:09,233 BUT SOMEBODY IN HER SIZE SHOULD LOSE AT LEAST 200 POUNDS. 547 00:30:09,233 --> 00:30:11,933 SHE SHOULD BE LOSING MORE WEIGHT. 548 00:30:11,933 --> 00:30:13,867 HOW IS YOUR ACTIVITY? 549 00:30:13,867 --> 00:30:17,700 ACTIVITY IS MORE THAN IT HAS BEEN IN THE PAST, 550 00:30:17,700 --> 00:30:20,133 BUT I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA BE ABLE TO KICK IT UP. 551 00:30:20,133 --> 00:30:24,500 OKAY. LET'S SEE IF WE CAN GET ANOTHER 50 POUNDS NEXT MONTH. 552 00:30:24,500 --> 00:30:25,700 OKAY. 553 00:30:25,700 --> 00:30:27,500 YOU'RE GONNA BE UNDER 400 POUNDS. 554 00:30:30,833 --> 00:30:32,833 Zsalynn: THE DOCTOR WAS POSITIVE, 555 00:30:32,833 --> 00:30:34,533 SO I'M REALLY HAPPY ABOUT THAT. 556 00:30:34,533 --> 00:30:38,600 BUT I'VE GOT TO MAKE MORE PROGRESS. 557 00:30:50,033 --> 00:30:53,000 I'M EXCITED ABOUT SEEING THIS TRAINER. 558 00:30:53,000 --> 00:30:54,400 HELLO. HI. 559 00:30:54,400 --> 00:30:59,033 I'M NERVOUS THAT GARETH IS GONNA FLIP OUT WHEN HE FINDS OUT, 560 00:30:59,033 --> 00:31:00,567 BUT I HAVE TO DO THIS FOR ME. 561 00:31:00,567 --> 00:31:02,167 SO, YOU HAD GASTRIC BYPASS, RIGHT? 562 00:31:02,167 --> 00:31:03,267 YES. 563 00:31:03,267 --> 00:31:04,833 PRIOR TO THAT, WERE YOU DOING ANY EXERCISE? 564 00:31:04,833 --> 00:31:06,133 NONE. OKAY. 565 00:31:06,133 --> 00:31:08,733 WHAT I WANT TO DO NEXT IS DO SOME BASIC ASSESSMENT 566 00:31:08,733 --> 00:31:10,767 SO I CAN KIND OF SEE WHERE YOU'RE AT. 567 00:31:12,400 --> 00:31:14,233 BREATHE IT OUT FOUR. 568 00:31:14,233 --> 00:31:15,833 ROLL IT BACK. UP FIVE. 569 00:31:15,833 --> 00:31:16,967 Zsalynn: I WANT TO BE A MOM. 570 00:31:16,967 --> 00:31:18,900 I WANT TO BE ACTIVE. I WANT TO BE MOBILE. 571 00:31:18,900 --> 00:31:21,400 COUNT THEM OUT. 28 AND TIME. RELAX. 572 00:31:21,400 --> 00:31:23,267 JUST MAKING MYSELF GO. 573 00:31:23,267 --> 00:31:24,633 Julia: YOU GOT THIS, YOU GOT THIS, YOU GOT THIS. 574 00:31:24,633 --> 00:31:26,467 PUSH IT OUT. PUSH IT OUT. 575 00:31:26,467 --> 00:31:27,633 ZSALYNN IS THE LARGEST PERSON 576 00:31:27,633 --> 00:31:29,133 THAT I'VE EVER PERSONALLY TRAINED. 577 00:31:29,133 --> 00:31:30,467 [ Laughing ] I CAN'T. 578 00:31:30,467 --> 00:31:33,100 I'M JUST CONCERNED ABOUT HER STAYING CONSISTENT 579 00:31:33,100 --> 00:31:35,667 AND REALLY GRABBING ON TO THIS AS A LIFESTYLE CHANGE, 580 00:31:35,667 --> 00:31:37,767 BECAUSE IT'S GONNA TAKE HER A LOT OF TIME 581 00:31:37,767 --> 00:31:39,300 TO GET TO WHERE SHE NEEDS TO BE. 582 00:31:39,300 --> 00:31:42,267 AND TIME. 45. GREAT JOB. GREAT JOB. 583 00:31:42,267 --> 00:31:43,700 YOU KNOW, OVERALL, 584 00:31:43,700 --> 00:31:45,733 I'M ACTUALLY PRETTY IMPRESSED WITH WHERE YOU'RE AT. 585 00:31:45,733 --> 00:31:48,600 YOU DON'T HAVE A TON OF RESTRICTIONS, HONESTLY, 586 00:31:48,600 --> 00:31:50,667 CONSIDERING YOUR WEIGHT. 587 00:31:50,667 --> 00:31:52,267 GREAT JOB. 588 00:31:52,267 --> 00:31:53,767 ALL RIGHT. 589 00:31:53,767 --> 00:31:55,700 THANK YOU. 590 00:31:55,700 --> 00:31:58,467 Zsalynn: I FEEL REALLY GOOD RIGHT NOW. 591 00:31:58,467 --> 00:32:02,333 I FEEL LIKE I'M ON TOP OF THE WORLD. 592 00:32:02,333 --> 00:32:04,400 BUT NOW I HAVE TO GO HOME AND TELL GARETH, 593 00:32:04,400 --> 00:32:07,333 AND HE'S PROBABLY NOT GONNA BE SO EXCITED FOR ME. 594 00:32:21,967 --> 00:32:23,767 YES. 595 00:32:23,767 --> 00:32:24,867 I DON'T KNOW. 596 00:32:24,867 --> 00:32:27,367 I'D RATHER HAVE A SALAD. 597 00:32:27,367 --> 00:32:28,433 I'M NOT BUYING YOU A SALAD. 598 00:32:28,433 --> 00:32:29,467 IF YOU WANT TO EAT GRASS, 599 00:32:29,467 --> 00:32:30,900 YOU CAN GO IN THE GARDEN AND GRAZE. 600 00:32:38,633 --> 00:32:40,433 [ HANNAH CRYING ] 601 00:32:42,367 --> 00:32:43,733 HANNAH, I MARRIED HIM 602 00:32:43,733 --> 00:32:46,100 BECAUSE IF I HADN'T MARRIED HIM, I WOULDN'T HAVE YOU, BABY. 603 00:32:46,100 --> 00:32:48,067 SO? 604 00:32:48,067 --> 00:32:52,800 NO, I AGREE WITH HANNAH. IT WASN'T WORTH IT. 605 00:32:52,800 --> 00:32:56,133 Zsalynn: THIS IS AN UNHEALTHY RELATIONSHIP FOR ANYONE. 606 00:32:56,133 --> 00:32:58,400 IT MAKES EVERYTHING HARDER. 607 00:33:02,367 --> 00:33:04,867 HUH? 608 00:33:04,867 --> 00:33:06,267 [ DOOR SLAMS ] 609 00:33:06,267 --> 00:33:10,800 Zsalynn: I KNOW THAT MY RELATIONSHIP -- 610 00:33:10,800 --> 00:33:13,233 I NEED TO MAKE A CHANGE, 611 00:33:13,233 --> 00:33:16,067 BUT I DON'T THINK I CAN DO TWO HARD THINGS AT ONCE. 612 00:33:23,067 --> 00:33:24,600 Zsalynn: EVEN THOUGH I KNOW 613 00:33:24,600 --> 00:33:27,833 THERE ARE PEOPLE IN MY LIFE WHO ARE GONNA BE AGAINST ME, 614 00:33:27,833 --> 00:33:29,567 I'M FINDING NEW WAYS 615 00:33:29,567 --> 00:33:32,067 TO MAKE THE MOST OF THIS EXPERIENCE. 616 00:33:32,067 --> 00:33:34,267 BUT TO BEAT THIS ADDICTION 617 00:33:34,267 --> 00:33:37,200 IS THE HARDEST DAILY STRUGGLE I HAVE. 618 00:33:50,833 --> 00:33:53,833 THIS IS THE LOWEST I'VE BEEN IN A LONG TIME. 619 00:33:53,833 --> 00:33:55,533 I'M LESS THAN 400 POUNDS. 620 00:33:55,533 --> 00:33:59,600 NOW MY RELATIONSHIP WITH FOOD IS ALL ABOUT FUEL. 621 00:33:59,600 --> 00:34:03,100 THIS PACKET HAS 18 GRAMS OF PROTEIN 622 00:34:03,100 --> 00:34:05,767 AND ONLY 80 CALORIES FOR THE WHOLE PACKET. 623 00:34:05,767 --> 00:34:07,767 [ CAT MEOWS ] 624 00:34:07,767 --> 00:34:10,567 TUNA AND AVOCADO. 625 00:34:10,567 --> 00:34:13,567 IT TAKES WORK EVERY SINGLE DAY. 626 00:34:13,567 --> 00:34:16,667 THE FOOD CRAVINGS ARE STILL THERE. 627 00:34:16,667 --> 00:34:18,933 I WOULD VERY, VERY EASILY 628 00:34:18,933 --> 00:34:22,600 BE ABLE TO GO BACK TO THE PLACE I WAS AT. 629 00:34:22,600 --> 00:34:25,600 BUT I HAVE TO MOVE FORWARD ONE STEP AT A TIME. 630 00:34:25,600 --> 00:34:29,767 HANNAH AND I HAVE A GOAL OF DOING A 5K IN APRIL, 631 00:34:29,767 --> 00:34:32,133 SO I REALLY HAVE TO STAY ON THE DIET, 632 00:34:32,133 --> 00:34:34,133 I HAVE TO CONTINUE TO LOSE WEIGHT, 633 00:34:34,133 --> 00:34:37,533 STAY FOCUSED ON THIS WEIGHT LOSS AND PHYSICAL FITNESS 634 00:34:37,533 --> 00:34:40,533 SO THAT OUR GOAL CAN BE REACHED. 635 00:34:40,533 --> 00:34:44,433 OKAY, SO, WE'RE GONNA HEAD UP CEDAR FLATS TRAIL TODAY. 636 00:34:44,433 --> 00:34:46,433 AT EVERY BENCH, WE'RE GONNA DO 637 00:34:46,433 --> 00:34:48,600 AN UPPER-BODY EXERCISE TO REST YOUR LEGS. 638 00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:50,133 OKAY. 639 00:34:50,133 --> 00:34:51,867 THIS WILL BE A REALLY GOOD VISUAL FOR YOU 640 00:34:51,867 --> 00:34:53,167 TO SEE HOW MUCH YOU IMPROVED. 641 00:34:53,167 --> 00:34:54,267 OKAY. 642 00:34:54,267 --> 00:34:55,300 YESTERDAY MORNING, 643 00:34:55,300 --> 00:34:56,467 YOU GOT ON THE SCALE AND WEIGHED HOW MUCH? 644 00:34:56,467 --> 00:34:57,633 399. 645 00:34:57,633 --> 00:34:59,300 THAT'S AWESOME. 646 00:34:59,300 --> 00:35:02,067 I WAS LIKE, "IF I COULD JUMP FOR JOY, I WOULD." 647 00:35:02,067 --> 00:35:03,900 THERE YOU GO. 648 00:35:03,900 --> 00:35:06,100 OKAY, HAVE TO SLOW DOWN. THAT'S ALL RIGHT. 649 00:35:06,100 --> 00:35:07,633 [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] 650 00:35:07,633 --> 00:35:08,833 GRAB THE HANDLES. 651 00:35:08,833 --> 00:35:10,833 WORK THE UPPER BODY FOR ABOUT A MINUTE. 652 00:35:10,833 --> 00:35:12,300 CURL IT UP. GOOD. 653 00:35:12,300 --> 00:35:13,467 CURL IT UP. BREATHE IT OUT. 654 00:35:13,467 --> 00:35:14,667 SLOW ON THAT RELEASE. GOOD. 655 00:35:14,667 --> 00:35:17,467 I FEEL LIKE I CAN FEEL FAT BURNING. 656 00:35:17,467 --> 00:35:18,733 THAT'S AWESOME. 657 00:35:20,800 --> 00:35:23,767 Zsalynn: IT FEELS SO GREAT, AFTER WORKING OUT. 658 00:35:23,767 --> 00:35:26,467 THAT HALF-MILE WAS AMAZING. 659 00:35:26,467 --> 00:35:28,833 I'M HAPPY TO DRINK WATER, 660 00:35:28,833 --> 00:35:32,200 BUT EVERY ONCE IN A WHILE, I DO STILL INDULGE. 661 00:35:32,200 --> 00:35:36,500 MAY I GET A LARGE DIET DR. PEPPER, PLEASE? 662 00:35:36,500 --> 00:35:40,167 NO. NO, NO, NO. NO FRIES. 663 00:35:40,167 --> 00:35:43,633 WELL, YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO DRINK CARBONATION, BUT... 664 00:35:53,767 --> 00:35:56,767 ...IT TASTES LIKE LIQUID GOLD. 665 00:35:56,767 --> 00:35:59,167 AND NOW IT'S GONNA HURT FOR A MINUTE 666 00:35:59,167 --> 00:36:02,167 'CAUSE ALL OF THE AIR IS IN MY LITTLE STOMACH. 667 00:36:02,167 --> 00:36:05,067 I HAVE TO BREAK DR. NOW'S RULES 668 00:36:05,067 --> 00:36:08,533 IN ORDER TO MAKE THIS DIET REALLY SUCCESSFUL, 669 00:36:08,533 --> 00:36:12,633 'CAUSE, YOU KNOW, I DO STILL HAVE TO LIVE AND ENJOY LIFE. 670 00:36:16,400 --> 00:36:18,400 GUESS HOW FAR I WALKED. 671 00:36:18,400 --> 00:36:20,833 UM, 3 FEET? 672 00:36:20,833 --> 00:36:22,267 10 FEET? MOVE. 673 00:36:22,267 --> 00:36:24,400 GARETH HAS JUST BEEN CHIPPING AWAY AT ME. 674 00:36:24,400 --> 00:36:27,367 Gareth: SO I GUESS YOU'RE GONNA CRY ALL AFTERNOON NOW 675 00:36:27,367 --> 00:36:28,900 ABOUT YOUR LEGS AND KNEES HURTING. 676 00:36:28,900 --> 00:36:30,533 YOU KNOW, I LEARNED A LONG TIME AGO 677 00:36:30,533 --> 00:36:31,833 YOU CAN'T CHANGE OTHER PEOPLE. 678 00:36:31,833 --> 00:36:33,933 [ Sarcastically ] YOU'RE SO SWEET, HONEY. 679 00:36:33,933 --> 00:36:36,533 THAT'S NICE. 680 00:36:36,533 --> 00:36:39,900 NOW I HAVE TO RELY ON MYSELF FOR HAPPINESS. 681 00:36:51,067 --> 00:36:55,100 I'M GOING TO SEE DR. NOW, AND HANNAH CAME WITH ME. 682 00:36:55,100 --> 00:36:56,533 HA. 683 00:36:56,533 --> 00:36:59,633 I HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH WEIGHT I'VE LOST SINCE I WAS HERE LAST. 684 00:37:02,900 --> 00:37:04,567 OKAY. 685 00:37:06,400 --> 00:37:08,333 ARE YOU GONNA LOOK? NOPE, I'M NOT LOOKING. 686 00:37:08,333 --> 00:37:11,900 Dr. Nowzaradan: YOU HAVEN'T LOST ANY WEIGHT. 687 00:37:11,900 --> 00:37:13,767 HOW MANY TIMES ARE YOU EATING? 688 00:37:13,767 --> 00:37:16,333 THREE, SOMETIMES TWO TIMES A DAY, NO SNACKING. 689 00:37:16,333 --> 00:37:17,767 WHAT ARE YOU DRINKING? 690 00:37:17,767 --> 00:37:18,933 WATER. 691 00:37:18,933 --> 00:37:20,500 MAYBE I HAVE A DIET COKE... 692 00:37:20,500 --> 00:37:22,500 DIET COKE? 693 00:37:22,500 --> 00:37:24,633 ONCE A WEEK, MAYBE. 694 00:37:24,633 --> 00:37:26,967 DIET COKE IS NOT RECOMMENDED AFTER BYPASS SURGERY. 695 00:37:26,967 --> 00:37:28,267 I KNOW. I DON'T -- 696 00:37:28,267 --> 00:37:30,300 IT'S NOT SOMETHING THAT I NORMALLY DO, RIGHT? 697 00:37:30,300 --> 00:37:33,067 WHAT DO I NORMALLY GET WHEN WE GO SOMEWHERE? 698 00:37:33,067 --> 00:37:34,100 WATER. 699 00:37:34,100 --> 00:37:35,933 WATER OR TEA. YEAH. 700 00:37:43,267 --> 00:37:47,333 SOMEHOW YOU NEED TO SHARPEN UP THESE EATING HABITS 701 00:37:47,333 --> 00:37:50,900 TO BE HEALTHY, LOW-CALORIE, LOW-FAT DIET. 702 00:37:50,900 --> 00:37:52,600 THANK YOU, DR. NOW. 703 00:37:52,600 --> 00:37:53,867 BYE-BYE. 704 00:37:59,433 --> 00:38:02,233 LET'S GET OUT OF HERE, PUMPKIN. 705 00:38:02,233 --> 00:38:04,100 Zsalynn: I THINK IN MY HEAD, 706 00:38:04,100 --> 00:38:05,167 "WHAT COULD YOU HAVE DONE BETTER? 707 00:38:05,167 --> 00:38:06,233 YOU SHOULD HAVE DONE THIS BETTER." 708 00:38:06,233 --> 00:38:08,567 THANK YOU SO MUCH. ALL RIGHT. 709 00:38:08,567 --> 00:38:12,067 I HAVE TO DO IT. I HAVE TO FIGURE IT OUT. 710 00:38:12,067 --> 00:38:13,067 NOT NOW. IN THE BACK. 711 00:38:18,067 --> 00:38:20,400 Zsalynn: I STILL HAVE TRIALS AND TRIBULATIONS. 712 00:38:20,400 --> 00:38:22,167 I STILL HAVE STUFF I'M GETTING ACCUSTOMED TO, 713 00:38:22,167 --> 00:38:24,833 BUT I DEFINITELY CAN LOOK IN THE MIRROR 714 00:38:24,833 --> 00:38:27,867 AND BE OVERJOYED WITH WHERE I'VE COME FROM. 715 00:38:35,200 --> 00:38:38,500 I REALIZE THIS IS A LONG JOURNEY, 716 00:38:38,500 --> 00:38:42,133 BUT I HAVE TO STAY FOCUSED SO THAT I CAN BE HEALTHY 717 00:38:42,133 --> 00:38:45,133 AND BE THE MOM THAT HANNAH NEEDS ME TO BE. 718 00:38:46,700 --> 00:38:50,533 HANNAH IS DEFINITELY MY BIGGEST MOTIVATION. 719 00:38:50,533 --> 00:38:53,967 DOING THINGS WITH HER IS REALLY IMPORTANT. 720 00:38:53,967 --> 00:38:56,767 I CERTAINLY CAN FEEL THE DIFFERENCE IN WHAT WE DO 721 00:38:56,767 --> 00:38:58,500 AND THE TIME WE SPEND TOGETHER. 722 00:38:58,500 --> 00:39:00,733 HANNAH, HAVE YOU EVER SEEN ME SIT IN A SWING BEFORE? 723 00:39:00,733 --> 00:39:01,733 NO. 724 00:39:01,733 --> 00:39:04,167 A YEAR AGO, I COULDN'T WALK THIS FAR 725 00:39:04,167 --> 00:39:05,933 AND PLAY WITH HANNAH AT THE PLAYGROUND. 726 00:39:05,933 --> 00:39:08,100 I WOULD HAVE TO SIT ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE FENCE AND WATCH, 727 00:39:08,100 --> 00:39:12,700 SO IT FEELS AMAZING THAT I CAN MAKE IT THIS FAR AND BACK. 728 00:39:12,700 --> 00:39:15,067 IT'S REALLY AMAZING. 729 00:39:18,067 --> 00:39:22,233 I'M GOING TO SEE DR. NOW FOR MY APPOINTMENT. 730 00:39:22,233 --> 00:39:25,900 I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE SCALE'S GONNA SAY. 731 00:39:25,900 --> 00:39:27,267 HELLO. HEY. 732 00:39:27,267 --> 00:39:30,700 I JUST FEEL REALLY HEALTHY. 733 00:39:32,933 --> 00:39:35,667 THAT'S A BIG DIFFERENCE. HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT? 734 00:39:35,667 --> 00:39:37,367 THAT'S AWESOME. 735 00:39:37,367 --> 00:39:39,867 Dr. Nowzaradan: YOU'RE DOING EXCELLENT, EXCELLENT. 736 00:39:39,867 --> 00:39:41,533 FROM 600 POUNDS TO 350. 737 00:39:41,533 --> 00:39:43,367 IF YOU KEEP IT UP, 738 00:39:43,367 --> 00:39:45,067 PRETTY SOON YOU'RE GONNA BE UNDER 200 POUNDS. 739 00:39:45,067 --> 00:39:46,067 YEAH, DEFINITELY. 740 00:39:46,067 --> 00:39:47,200 I'LL SEE YOU LATER. 741 00:39:47,200 --> 00:39:49,200 ALL RIGHT, SOUNDS GOOD. THANK YOU. 742 00:39:49,200 --> 00:39:50,400 SHE FEELS GOOD. SHE'S EATING GOOD. 743 00:39:50,400 --> 00:39:52,067 THANK YOU, JESUS. 744 00:39:52,067 --> 00:39:56,700 SHE'S GOING BACK ON TRACK AND START MAKING PROGRESS AGAIN. 745 00:39:56,700 --> 00:39:59,633 Zsalynn: I'M PROUD OF MYSELF EVERY SINGLE DAY. 746 00:39:59,633 --> 00:40:01,533 IT'S JUST LITTLE TINY VICTORIES 747 00:40:01,533 --> 00:40:04,400 THAT MAKES THIS JOURNEY REALLY UNBELIEVABLE. 748 00:40:08,200 --> 00:40:10,500 HANNAH, HOW'S YOUR HOMEWORK COMING? 749 00:40:10,500 --> 00:40:11,767 Hannah: WE'RE DOING THIS ONE. 750 00:40:11,767 --> 00:40:14,000 AND WE'RE GONNA DO THIS ONE NEXT. 751 00:40:14,000 --> 00:40:17,000 TODAY I WAS SUPPOSED TO DO A 5K, 752 00:40:17,000 --> 00:40:19,267 DOWNTOWN SAN ANTONIO WITH HANNAH. 753 00:40:19,267 --> 00:40:21,700 UNFORTUNATELY, I TWISTED MY ANKLE, 754 00:40:21,700 --> 00:40:27,000 AND NOW I'M LAID UP WITH THIS BIG BOOT ON MY LEG AND CRUTCHES. 755 00:40:29,700 --> 00:40:33,567 I DON'T CONSIDER THIS DAY LOST, EVEN THOUGH WE CAN'T DO THE 5K. 756 00:40:33,567 --> 00:40:36,933 WE'RE STILL JUST GONNA HANG OUT, MAKE A HEALTHY DINNER, 757 00:40:36,933 --> 00:40:39,433 AND JUST MAKE THE BEST OF THE DAY. 758 00:40:39,433 --> 00:40:40,933 WHERE DO I POUR IT? 759 00:40:40,933 --> 00:40:42,067 NOT YET. 760 00:40:42,067 --> 00:40:44,533 WE'RE GONNA MAKE SPAGHETTI SQUASH 761 00:40:44,533 --> 00:40:46,367 WITH SOME CHICKEN BREASTS. 762 00:40:46,367 --> 00:40:48,400 Gareth: IS IT READY? 763 00:40:48,400 --> 00:40:50,900 IT SHOULD DEFINITELY BE READY. 764 00:40:50,900 --> 00:40:53,667 IT ACTUALLY DON'T TASTE BAD. I'M KIND OF SURPRISED. 765 00:40:53,667 --> 00:40:56,500 COOKING IS DEFINITELY NOT YOUR FORTE IN LIFE. 766 00:40:56,500 --> 00:40:59,733 Zsalynn: I DON'T KNOW WHY GARETH IS THE WAY HE IS. 767 00:40:59,733 --> 00:41:02,167 I THINK THERE MIGHT BE A POINT IN OUR MARRIAGE 768 00:41:02,167 --> 00:41:04,133 WHEN I'M NOT ABLE TO TAKE IT ANYMORE. 769 00:41:04,133 --> 00:41:07,767 I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT POINT IS. I DON'T KNOW. 770 00:41:07,767 --> 00:41:11,067 BUT WHEN I'M THERE, I'LL KNOW IT. 771 00:41:11,067 --> 00:41:13,800 COME HERE, HANNAH, LET ME BRUSH YOUR HAIR, BABE. 772 00:41:13,800 --> 00:41:17,067 SO, UNTIL THEN, THE GREATEST JOY IN MY LIFE 773 00:41:17,067 --> 00:41:20,233 IS BEING THIS LITTLE GIRL'S MOTHER. 774 00:41:20,233 --> 00:41:22,767 SHE'S THE REASON I'M DOING ALL OF THIS. 775 00:41:29,533 --> 00:41:32,600 OH, MY GOD. THEY FIT. 776 00:41:32,600 --> 00:41:36,067 IT'S BEEN LIKE 7 YEARS SINCE I'VE WORN A PAIR OF JEANS. 777 00:41:36,067 --> 00:41:38,133 GET MOVING, BABE, PLEASE. 778 00:41:38,133 --> 00:41:42,400 I'M REALLY EXCITED TO GO RIDING HORSES WITH MY MOM TODAY. 779 00:41:42,400 --> 00:41:43,700 [ ENGINE TURNS OVER ] 780 00:41:43,700 --> 00:41:46,833 Zsalynn: THIS JOURNEY IS A LONG, LONG ROAD, BUT... 781 00:41:46,833 --> 00:41:47,933 HELLO! 782 00:41:47,933 --> 00:41:49,067 ...FOR HANNAH... 783 00:41:49,067 --> 00:41:50,967 HE JUST LICKED ME. 784 00:41:50,967 --> 00:41:53,167 ...I FEEL LIKE WE ARE ON THE RIGHT PATH. 785 00:41:53,167 --> 00:41:54,933 I'M SCARED I'M GONNA FALL. 786 00:41:54,933 --> 00:41:56,700 YOU'LL BE FINE. 787 00:41:56,700 --> 00:41:58,800 I LOVE MYSELF ENOUGH TO MAKE BETTER CHOICES... 788 00:41:58,800 --> 00:42:01,267 YOU CAN SMILE AND WAVE. GIVE A LITTLE... 789 00:42:01,267 --> 00:42:03,233 ...AND TO BE STRONGER. BEAUTIFUL! 790 00:42:03,233 --> 00:42:06,167 Hannah: IT'S GOOD TO HAVE MY MOM, LIKE, EVERY STEP OF THE WAY, 791 00:42:06,167 --> 00:42:08,233 NOT JUST, LIKE, A FEW STEPS. 792 00:42:08,233 --> 00:42:10,500 I HAD FUN TODAY. 793 00:42:10,500 --> 00:42:12,233 I'M A WORK IN PROGRESS. 794 00:42:12,233 --> 00:42:14,700 BUT I HOPE THAT HANNAH LEARNS 795 00:42:14,700 --> 00:42:17,967 THAT NO MATTER WHAT THE OBSTACLE, 796 00:42:17,967 --> 00:42:20,100 YOU CAN OVERCOME IT. 797 00:42:21,167 --> 00:42:23,200 LIFE IS AMAZING NOW. 798 00:42:23,200 --> 00:42:24,533 I'M REALLY PROUD OF MYSELF. 799 00:42:24,533 --> 00:42:27,133 EVERY DAY IS A BRAND-NEW DAY, 800 00:42:27,133 --> 00:42:30,833 AND IT BRINGS BRAND-NEW, AWESOME CHALLENGES. 801 00:42:30,833 --> 00:42:32,300 DO YOU WANT TO DO IT AGAIN? 802 00:42:32,300 --> 00:42:32,533 Hannah: YEAH. 802 00:42:33,305 --> 00:43:33,545 Watch Online Movies and Series for FREE www.osdb.link/lm