"My 600-lb Life" Dottie & June

1 00:00:02,967 --> 00:00:06,667 -- Captions by VITAC -- www.vitac.com 2 00:00:06,667 --> 00:00:08,600 Milla: I CAN'T EVEN TAKE CARE OF MYSELF. 3 00:00:08,600 --> 00:00:11,500 MY CHILDREN HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING FOR ME. 4 00:00:11,500 --> 00:00:13,967 Charity: I FEEL LIKE SOME MONSTER. 5 00:00:13,967 --> 00:00:15,967 Nikki: I'M IN SO MUCH PAIN. 6 00:00:15,967 --> 00:00:18,633 [ Crying ] IT'S MISERABLE. 7 00:00:18,633 --> 00:00:22,767 Brittani: MY BODY IS THE MOST DISGUSTING THING IN THE WORLD. 8 00:00:22,767 --> 00:00:25,267 ** 9 00:00:25,267 --> 00:00:26,800 Woman: I'M TERRIFIED RIGHT NOW. 10 00:00:26,800 --> 00:00:30,800 June: I'M RISKING MY LIFE FOR A BETTER LIFE. 11 00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:32,833 I LOVE YOU, MOMMY. 12 00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:40,074 Watch Online Movies and Series for FREE www.osdb.link/lm 13 00:00:43,400 --> 00:00:46,033 -OOH, CHILD! -PULL. GOOD. THERE YOU GO! 14 00:00:46,033 --> 00:00:47,533 GOOD JOB. 15 00:00:47,533 --> 00:00:51,167 Teretha: I'M GETTING STRONGER, BUT I KNOW I HAVE A LONG WAY TO GO. 16 00:00:51,167 --> 00:00:53,833 Paula: I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE WHAT THE FUTURE HOLDS. 17 00:00:53,833 --> 00:00:57,467 ** 18 00:00:57,467 --> 00:01:02,133 Susan: I AM NOW EXPRESSING MYSELF AND LIVING MY OWN TRUTH. 19 00:01:02,133 --> 00:01:04,700 Milla: I'M SO HAPPY ABOUT THE PROGRESS I'VE MADE. 20 00:01:04,700 --> 00:01:10,900 June: I AM LIVING LIFE, AND I'M LOVING EVERY SECOND OF IT. 21 00:01:10,900 --> 00:01:13,067 Ashley: I'VE ACCOMPLISHED A LOT THIS YEAR. 22 00:01:13,067 --> 00:01:15,200 Lupe: THIS FEELS AMAZING. 23 00:01:15,200 --> 00:01:18,800 CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY DISCOVERY COMMUNICATIONS 24 00:01:18,800 --> 00:01:21,233 Dottie: I'M JUST GROTESQUE. I'M HUGE. 25 00:01:21,233 --> 00:01:23,500 I'M SICKENING LOOKING. 26 00:01:23,500 --> 00:01:27,233 AND I'VE FELT THAT WAY FOR AS LONG AS I CAN REMEMBER. 27 00:01:31,267 --> 00:01:34,233 EVEN THOUGH I AM AS OVERWEIGHT AS I AM, 28 00:01:34,233 --> 00:01:36,133 I HAVE TO GET UP EVERY DAY 29 00:01:36,133 --> 00:01:38,567 BECAUSE I HAVE TWO KIDS THAT DEPEND ON ME. 30 00:01:38,567 --> 00:01:41,867 DANIEL, WHO IS 12 AND HAS CEREBRAL PALSY, 31 00:01:41,867 --> 00:01:44,067 AND LANDON, WHO IS 1. 32 00:01:44,067 --> 00:01:46,700 BUT I CAN BARELY GET AROUND. 33 00:01:46,700 --> 00:01:50,367 AND IT MAKES IT SO HARD TO TAKE CARE OF THEM. 34 00:01:50,367 --> 00:01:53,567 Chris: DOTTIE -- SHE'S A -- SHE'S A GREAT MOM. 35 00:01:53,567 --> 00:01:54,967 SHE'S THE LOVE OF MY LIFE, 36 00:01:54,967 --> 00:01:58,933 BUT I THINK SHE'S KILLING HERSELF. 37 00:01:58,933 --> 00:02:01,200 Dottie: AND I DON'T WANT TO DIE. 38 00:02:01,200 --> 00:02:04,900 BUT I KNOW I DON'T HAVE MUCH TIME LEFT. 39 00:02:04,900 --> 00:02:08,500 SO, ME AND CHRIS ARE HEADING TO HOUSTON 40 00:02:08,500 --> 00:02:12,467 TO SEE A DOCTOR WHO DOES SURGERY ON PEOPLE MY SIZE. 41 00:02:12,467 --> 00:02:15,367 I JUST HOPE I'M NOT BEYOND HELP. 42 00:02:15,367 --> 00:02:17,100 Nurse: 641. 43 00:02:17,100 --> 00:02:22,333 DOTTIE HAS TO BE EATING AROUND 30,000 CALORIES A DAY. 44 00:02:22,333 --> 00:02:26,433 I WANT YOU TO LOSE 40 POUNDS OVER THE NEXT TWO MONTHS. 45 00:02:28,667 --> 00:02:31,200 Dottie: WHEN I GOT HOME FROM THE DOCTOR'S, 46 00:02:31,200 --> 00:02:32,933 DANIEL WAS HAVING TROUBLE BREATHING, 47 00:02:32,933 --> 00:02:35,133 SO HE HAD TO BE RUSHED TO THE HOSPITAL. 48 00:02:35,133 --> 00:02:39,567 AND UNTIL DANIEL GETS BETTER, I CAN'T WORRY ABOUT MY WEIGHT. 49 00:02:39,567 --> 00:02:44,067 SO THE DOCTOR IS GONNA HAVE TO WAIT. 50 00:02:44,067 --> 00:02:46,433 AFTER ABOUT FIVE WEEKS IN THE HOSPITAL, 51 00:02:46,433 --> 00:02:47,833 DANIEL STARTED GETTING BETTER, 52 00:02:47,833 --> 00:02:49,933 SO WE WERE ABLE TO BRING HIM HOME. 53 00:02:49,933 --> 00:02:51,400 BUT I'VE BEEN REALLY WORRIED 54 00:02:51,400 --> 00:02:53,800 THAT SOMETHING COULD GO WRONG AGAIN. 55 00:02:53,800 --> 00:02:57,067 SO MY SISTER'S COME TO HELP WITH THE KIDS. 56 00:02:57,067 --> 00:02:59,167 BUT SHE REALLY DOESN'T UNDERSTAND 57 00:02:59,167 --> 00:03:01,567 WHAT I HAVE TO DEAL WITH EVERY DAY. 58 00:03:01,567 --> 00:03:02,567 YOU GONNA EAT SOME PIZZA? 59 00:03:02,567 --> 00:03:04,067 I COULD TAKE THAT PIZZA 60 00:03:04,067 --> 00:03:05,467 AND THROW IT OUT THAT DOOR RIGHT NOW. 61 00:03:05,467 --> 00:03:06,600 I'M SO MAD. 62 00:03:06,600 --> 00:03:10,467 WELL, WE HAD TO HAVE SOME SUPPER TONIGHT. 63 00:03:10,467 --> 00:03:13,167 [ BABY CRIES ] THAT'S KILLING YOU. 64 00:03:13,167 --> 00:03:16,267 THAT'S KILLING YOU. 65 00:03:16,267 --> 00:03:18,567 THAT'S KILLING YOU. 66 00:03:18,567 --> 00:03:21,433 THIS HAS TO STOP. 67 00:03:21,433 --> 00:03:23,067 Dr. Nowzaradan: YOU GAINED 30 POUNDS. 68 00:03:23,067 --> 00:03:28,067 I'M READY TO PUT MY HEALTH FORWARD THIS TIME, 69 00:03:28,067 --> 00:03:30,133 THEN IT'S TIME TO PROVE IT TO ME. 70 00:03:30,133 --> 00:03:31,867 YOU'RE GOING TO A HOSPITAL RIGHT NOW 71 00:03:31,867 --> 00:03:33,667 TO START YOUR CONTROLLED DIET. 72 00:03:36,267 --> 00:03:38,067 IT'S BEEN A BIT OF AN ADJUSTMENT 73 00:03:38,067 --> 00:03:39,767 SINCE I'VE BEEN HERE IN THE HOSPITAL 74 00:03:39,767 --> 00:03:43,400 BECAUSE I USUALLY EAT THREE OR FOUR TIMES THESE AMOUNTS. 75 00:03:43,400 --> 00:03:46,433 BUT I'M TRYING TO LEARN MORE OF WHAT I SHOULD BE DOING. 76 00:03:46,433 --> 00:03:48,833 Dr. Nowzaradan: DOTTIE HAS BEEN ON A CONTROLLED DIET 77 00:03:48,833 --> 00:03:50,067 FOR A MONTH NOW. 78 00:03:50,067 --> 00:03:51,967 YOU LOST ALMOST 70 POUNDS THIS MONTH. 79 00:03:51,967 --> 00:03:54,600 SO I'M GONNA SET YOU UP FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY, OKAY? 80 00:03:54,600 --> 00:03:57,367 -YAY! YAY! -OKAY? 81 00:03:57,367 --> 00:04:00,467 ALL RIGHT, DOTTIE'S SURGERY WENT VERY WELL. 82 00:04:00,467 --> 00:04:04,567 THERE WILL BE SOME UPS AND DOWNS WITH HER SOON, I'M SURE. 83 00:04:04,567 --> 00:04:07,500 BUT SHE'S ON THE RIGHT TRACK FOR NOW. 84 00:04:07,500 --> 00:04:09,967 Dottie: AND SEEING THE PROGRESS I'M MAKING 85 00:04:09,967 --> 00:04:12,567 MAKES ME EXCITED TO DO MORE. 86 00:04:12,567 --> 00:04:15,200 I KNOW I STILL HAVE A LOT OF WORK TO DO, 87 00:04:15,200 --> 00:04:18,500 BUT FOR THE FIRST TIME IN A LONG TIME, 88 00:04:18,500 --> 00:04:20,967 I'M NOT AFRAID OF WHAT THE FUTURE HOLDS. 89 00:04:24,967 --> 00:04:28,067 ** 90 00:04:37,467 --> 00:04:39,300 I'M REALLY EXCITED ABOUT TODAY 91 00:04:39,300 --> 00:04:42,633 BECAUSE I'M GONNA START WORKING OUT WITH A TRAINER. 92 00:04:42,633 --> 00:04:46,400 LOSING OVER 100 POUNDS IN THE LAST FIVE MONTHS 93 00:04:46,400 --> 00:04:51,833 AND HAVING ALL THE ENERGY THAT I HAVE RIGHT NOW FEELS INCREDIBLE. 94 00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:53,233 AND I WANT TO KEEP DOING MORE 95 00:04:53,233 --> 00:04:55,667 NOW THAT I SEE ALL THESE CHANGES. 96 00:04:55,667 --> 00:04:58,600 BUT IT'S HARD TO DO SOMETHING REALLY ACTIVE. 97 00:04:58,600 --> 00:05:01,067 I'LL WORKOUT AT THE HOUSE WITH DANIEL AND LANDON 98 00:05:01,067 --> 00:05:05,067 NEEDING ME ALL THE TIME. 99 00:05:05,067 --> 00:05:08,167 SO MY HUSBAND CHRIS AND I HAVE DECIDED TO EXTEND THE NURSE 100 00:05:08,167 --> 00:05:12,467 WE'VE HAD WATCHING DANIEL SO I CAN SPEND SOME TIME AT THE GYM. 101 00:05:12,467 --> 00:05:15,800 THIS IS GONNA BE A COMPLETELY NEW EXPERIENCE, 102 00:05:15,800 --> 00:05:17,800 AND I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO IT. 103 00:05:17,800 --> 00:05:20,567 I'M KRISTINA -- SO NICE TO MEET YOU. 104 00:05:20,567 --> 00:05:22,067 YOU WANT TO GET STARTED? 105 00:05:22,067 --> 00:05:26,167 SO, WE'RE GONNA START WITH OUR ARM CIRCLES FORWARD, OKAY? 106 00:05:26,167 --> 00:05:28,267 REALLY TRY TO TWIST. YEP. 107 00:05:28,267 --> 00:05:30,267 THIS FEELS REALLY GOOD. 108 00:05:30,267 --> 00:05:33,067 ALL RIGHT, GOOD. NOW WE'RE GONNA GO ROWS. 109 00:05:33,067 --> 00:05:37,333 IT'S HARD, BUT IT'S NICE FOR RIGHT NOW, BECAUSE IT'S TIME 110 00:05:37,333 --> 00:05:39,500 THAT I CAN SPEND JUST BEING ME 111 00:05:39,500 --> 00:05:42,600 AND NOT BEING A MOM AND NOT BEING A WIFE. 112 00:05:42,600 --> 00:05:46,333 I CAN JUST FOCUS ON THIS AND TRY TO PUSH MYSELF. 113 00:05:46,333 --> 00:05:50,700 GOOD JOB. GOOD. THAT WAS A GOOD REP. 114 00:05:50,700 --> 00:05:55,067 I'VE SPENT SO MANY YEARS JUST FOCUSING ON MY FAMILY AND DANIEL 115 00:05:55,067 --> 00:05:58,167 BECAUSE HE CONSTANTLY NEEDS ME. 116 00:05:58,167 --> 00:06:01,867 AND I'M HAPPY TO BE THERE FOR HIM ALL THAT I CAN, 117 00:06:01,867 --> 00:06:04,667 AND I WOULDN'T TRADE ANY OF THAT. 118 00:06:04,667 --> 00:06:07,200 BUT I KNOW IF I DON'T GET HEALTHY 119 00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:08,767 AND I KEEP GETTING WORSE, 120 00:06:08,767 --> 00:06:12,600 I'M NOT GONNA BE THERE FOR HIM AT ALL. 121 00:06:12,600 --> 00:06:16,200 WHEN DANIEL STARTED STRUGGLING AGAIN THIS PAST YEAR 122 00:06:16,200 --> 00:06:19,900 AND I ALMOST LOST HIM, I JUST WENT OFF THE RAILS 123 00:06:19,900 --> 00:06:23,900 AND GOT UP TO MY HIGHEST WEIGHT EVER 124 00:06:23,900 --> 00:06:28,467 BECAUSE THOSE ARE THE MOST STRESSFUL TIMES IN MY LIFE. 125 00:06:28,467 --> 00:06:33,433 DR. NOWZARADAN KEEPS TELLING ME THERE IS NO SITUATION 126 00:06:33,433 --> 00:06:37,233 THAT JUSTIFIES MAKING UNHEALTHY CHOICES. 127 00:06:37,233 --> 00:06:40,067 SO ALL I CAN DO IS TRY HARDER EVERY DAY, 128 00:06:40,067 --> 00:06:42,067 AND NO MATTER THE SITUATION, 129 00:06:42,067 --> 00:06:45,400 TO KEEP GETTING HEALTHIER AND TO SET MYSELF UP 130 00:06:45,400 --> 00:06:50,367 TO MAKE THOSE CHOICES NO MATTER WHAT'S GOING ON IN MY LIFE. 131 00:06:50,367 --> 00:06:52,733 AND THAT'S WHAT I'M DOING NOW. 132 00:06:52,733 --> 00:06:54,333 NICE! 133 00:06:54,333 --> 00:06:56,700 GOOD JOB! WAY TO FINISH. 134 00:06:56,700 --> 00:07:00,267 I HAVE DEFINITELY SURPRISED MYSELF AT THE THINGS 135 00:07:00,267 --> 00:07:01,933 THAT I'M DOING IN THE GYM. 136 00:07:01,933 --> 00:07:03,467 NICE JOB! 137 00:07:03,467 --> 00:07:07,100 I'VE DID THINGS NOW THAT I WOULD NOT HAVE BEEN ABLE 138 00:07:07,100 --> 00:07:09,467 TO DO A YEAR AGO, AND IT -- 139 00:07:09,467 --> 00:07:13,200 YOU KNOW, IT MAKES ME FEEL REALLY PROUD OF MYSELF. 140 00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:16,933 I'M MORE ACTIVE THEN I'VE EVER REALLY BEEN. 141 00:07:16,933 --> 00:07:19,133 BUT I KNOW THAT'S HALF THE BATTLE. 142 00:07:22,700 --> 00:07:25,500 AND I'M ALSO STILL WORKING ON THE OTHER HALF OF MY BATTLE 143 00:07:25,500 --> 00:07:27,467 WITH MY FOOD CHOICES. 144 00:07:32,467 --> 00:07:35,067 THE HARDEST MEAL IS DINNER, THOUGH, 145 00:07:35,067 --> 00:07:38,367 BECAUSE ONCE I GET DANIEL AND LANDON READY FOR BED 146 00:07:38,367 --> 00:07:41,500 AND EVERYTHING TAKEN CARE OF FOR THE DAY, 147 00:07:41,500 --> 00:07:46,767 IT'S JUST HARD TO COOK A MEAL, SO WE ORDER OUT A LOT RIGHT NOW. 148 00:07:46,767 --> 00:07:50,167 AND I'M TRYING TO STICK TO SALADS. 149 00:07:50,167 --> 00:07:53,600 BUT I WILL SAY MAKING HEALTHY CHOICES WITH WHAT I EAT 150 00:07:53,600 --> 00:07:56,067 AT EVERY MEAL IS MY BIGGEST STRUGGLE... 151 00:07:56,067 --> 00:07:57,833 Chris: YEAH, I'LL BE BACK IN A MINUTE. 152 00:08:00,500 --> 00:08:03,400 ...ESPECIALLY WHEN I START TO WORRY ABOUT DANIEL, 153 00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:06,467 IF HE'S NOT DOING WELL THAT DAY OR STRUGGLING. 154 00:08:06,467 --> 00:08:09,067 HI, POOH. 155 00:08:14,700 --> 00:08:17,067 MY GOAL IS TO BE THERE FOR MY FAMILY... 156 00:08:17,067 --> 00:08:18,667 ARE YOU GONNA OPEN YOUR EYES? 157 00:08:18,667 --> 00:08:20,333 ...AND TO BE THERE FOR DANIEL 158 00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:22,667 FOR AS MUCH AS HE NEEDS ME, 159 00:08:25,133 --> 00:08:29,700 AND WHEN HE HAS HIS HARD TIMES, TO BE READY TO STAY ON TRACK 160 00:08:29,700 --> 00:08:31,767 SO I DON'T START TO GAIN AGAIN. 161 00:08:34,567 --> 00:08:36,533 WHEN I HAVE ALL THAT STRESS ON ME, 162 00:08:36,533 --> 00:08:38,667 MY FAMILY IS MY MOTIVATION, 163 00:08:38,667 --> 00:08:41,067 AND I'M NOT GONNA LET THEM DOWN AGAIN. 164 00:08:45,867 --> 00:08:49,067 I DIDN'T KNOW THEY PUT BACON ON THESE. 165 00:08:49,067 --> 00:08:50,467 Chris: I DIDN'T EITHER. 166 00:08:50,467 --> 00:08:52,167 WELL, I CAN'T PICK ALL THAT OFF, 167 00:08:52,167 --> 00:08:55,300 NOT IN THEM LITTLE, BITTY, OLD PIECES. 168 00:08:55,300 --> 00:08:58,833 I THINK I'M READY TO GO BACK AND SEE DR. NOW. 169 00:08:58,833 --> 00:09:01,133 YOU THINK YOU'VE LOST ENOUGH WEIGHT? 170 00:09:01,133 --> 00:09:02,333 I DON'T KNOW. 171 00:09:02,333 --> 00:09:03,567 YEAH. 172 00:09:06,233 --> 00:09:09,267 ** 173 00:09:10,367 --> 00:09:14,233 THE WEIGHT IS TOO MUCH. 174 00:09:14,233 --> 00:09:18,267 AND IT'S JUST DIFFICULT TO DO ANYTHING ON MY OWN. 175 00:09:18,267 --> 00:09:22,667 SO GIRLFRIEND, SADI, DOES EVERYTHING PHYSICAL FOR ME. 176 00:09:28,067 --> 00:09:31,067 FOUR YEARS AGO, MY SON MACK WAS IN THE WRONG PLACE 177 00:09:31,067 --> 00:09:34,067 AT THE WRONG TIME AND HE WAS SHOT AND KILLED. 178 00:09:34,067 --> 00:09:36,333 I INSTANTLY WENT NUMB. 179 00:09:36,333 --> 00:09:39,833 THAT WAS THE MOMENT WHERE EVERYTHING CHANGED. 180 00:09:39,833 --> 00:09:41,367 I SHUT DOWN. 181 00:09:41,367 --> 00:09:44,367 I NEEDED SOMETHING TO COPE WITH. 182 00:09:44,367 --> 00:09:46,367 I DIDN'T CARE ABOUT MY SIZE. 183 00:09:46,367 --> 00:09:49,133 AND I JUST ATE. 184 00:09:49,133 --> 00:09:54,167 BUT SOMETHING HAS TO CHANGE, OR I'M GOING TO DIE. 185 00:09:59,467 --> 00:10:03,800 I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THE SCALE IS GONNA SAY. 186 00:10:03,800 --> 00:10:05,500 [ GASPS ] 187 00:10:05,500 --> 00:10:08,000 YOU HAVE A NUMBER OF MEDICAL ISSUES. 188 00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:10,867 A HEART ATTACK IN -- I HAD A MAJOR STROKE. 189 00:10:10,867 --> 00:10:12,400 I AM VERY CONCERNED. 190 00:10:12,400 --> 00:10:15,533 IF I SEND YOU HOME, IT MAY BE THE LAST TIME I SEE YOU. 191 00:10:15,533 --> 00:10:19,633 SO I'M GOING TO ADMIT YOU TO A HOSPITAL IMMEDIATELY. 192 00:10:19,633 --> 00:10:22,367 Dr. Nowzaradan: JUNE HAS BEEN IN THE HOSPITAL FOR A MONTH, 193 00:10:22,367 --> 00:10:26,100 BUT DESPITE HER PUSHBACK TO THE PROGRAM, WE STUCK WITH IT, 194 00:10:26,100 --> 00:10:28,300 AND SHE MADE SOME PROGRESS. 195 00:10:28,300 --> 00:10:29,400 HEY. 196 00:10:29,400 --> 00:10:32,000 RIGHT NOW, SHE'S HEALTHY ENOUGH TO GO HOME, 197 00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:36,533 AND FOR NEXT MONTH, I WANT JUNE TO JUST LOSE FIVE POUNDS. 198 00:10:36,533 --> 00:10:41,433 IS SHE DOES, THEN I WILL APPROVE HER FOR GASTRIC BYPASS SURGERY. 199 00:10:43,000 --> 00:10:45,400 June: SINCE BEING AT THE HOSPITAL, 200 00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:47,400 I HAVEN'T BEEN FEELING WELL. 201 00:10:47,400 --> 00:10:51,467 I WAS HOPING TO HAVE MADE MORE PROGRESS BY NOW. 202 00:10:51,467 --> 00:10:56,333 AND I HAVE TO ADMIT, I DID CHEAT. 203 00:10:56,333 --> 00:10:58,833 HMM. 204 00:10:58,833 --> 00:11:01,267 Dr. Nowzaradan: OKAY, JUNE, YOU GAINED 20 POUNDS, 205 00:11:01,267 --> 00:11:04,667 AND I SEE THAT UNWILLINGNESS TO CHANGE. 206 00:11:04,667 --> 00:11:06,500 I RESPECT YOU TOTALLY, 207 00:11:06,500 --> 00:11:08,267 BUT I'M GONNA SAY THIS -- YOU'RE WRONG. 208 00:11:08,267 --> 00:11:10,300 I'M GONNA TELL YOU WHY YOU'RE WRONG... 209 00:11:10,300 --> 00:11:13,500 BECAUSE I KNOW THIS IS MY TIME TO LOSE WEIGHT. 210 00:11:13,500 --> 00:11:16,567 OKAY. LOSE THE 20 POUNDS THAT YOU GAINED. 211 00:11:16,567 --> 00:11:18,567 I'LL GIVE YOU TWO WEEKS. 212 00:11:18,567 --> 00:11:20,333 2 WEEKS, 20 POUNDS? 213 00:11:20,333 --> 00:11:21,533 YOU CAN DO THAT. 214 00:11:21,533 --> 00:11:25,200 I HAVE WORKED SO HARD. 215 00:11:25,200 --> 00:11:30,133 I HOPE AND PRAY IT'S ENOUGH TO GET THIS SURGERY. 216 00:11:30,133 --> 00:11:33,067 THIS IS MY LAST CHANCE. 217 00:11:33,067 --> 00:11:37,133 EVERYTHING IS RIDING ON THIS NUMBER BEING LOW ENOUGH. 218 00:11:37,133 --> 00:11:38,667 THAT'S IT. 219 00:11:38,667 --> 00:11:40,233 SUPER. 220 00:11:40,233 --> 00:11:43,100 WE'RE GOING THEN TO SET YOU UP FOR YOUR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY. 221 00:11:43,100 --> 00:11:44,567 AWESOME. 222 00:11:44,567 --> 00:11:46,500 Dr. Nowzaradan: THIS BYPASS IS GOING TO BE 223 00:11:46,500 --> 00:11:48,467 A MAJOR ADJUSTMENT FOR HER. 224 00:11:48,467 --> 00:11:52,933 IT WILL LIMIT THE AMOUNT OF FOOD SHE CAN EAT IN ONE SETTING. 225 00:11:52,933 --> 00:11:56,133 June: IT'S BEEN FRUSTRATING, BECAUSE I EXPECTED THE SURGERY 226 00:11:56,133 --> 00:11:58,800 TO MAKE THINGS EASIER. 227 00:11:58,800 --> 00:12:02,300 IT HASN'T, AND I FEEL WEAKER THAN EVER BEFORE. 228 00:12:02,300 --> 00:12:05,233 BUT I STILL MADE GOOD PROGRESS. 229 00:12:05,233 --> 00:12:07,167 WELL, SOMETHING ELSE IS GOING ON. 230 00:12:07,167 --> 00:12:11,967 WHAT I RECOMMEND THAT WE GET YOU SEE A PSYCHOTHERAPIST. 231 00:12:11,967 --> 00:12:14,067 WHY CONSTANTLY DWELL ON SOMETHING 232 00:12:14,067 --> 00:12:15,367 THAT YOU CANNOT CHANGE? 233 00:12:15,367 --> 00:12:19,100 THE POINT IS FOR YOU TO BE ABLE TO SIT WITH THE FEELINGS 234 00:12:19,100 --> 00:12:22,467 THAT CAME ABOUT FROM WHAT HAPPENED. 235 00:12:22,467 --> 00:12:25,200 TODAY'S MY SON, MACK'S, BIRTHDAY. 236 00:12:25,200 --> 00:12:28,067 I'LL NEVER BE OKAY WITH HIS PASSING. 237 00:12:28,067 --> 00:12:32,100 BUT I WILL LEARN TO BE STRONG, AND THAT LIVING MY LIFE 238 00:12:32,100 --> 00:12:34,733 DOESN'T MEAN I'M FORGETTING HIS. 239 00:12:34,733 --> 00:12:38,267 SO NOW I AM LIVING LIFE. 240 00:12:38,267 --> 00:12:40,767 AND I'M LOVING EVERY SECOND OF IT. 241 00:12:58,900 --> 00:13:01,700 SINCE I STARTED MY WEIGHT-LOSS JOURNEY, 242 00:13:01,700 --> 00:13:04,700 I'VE LOST OVER 200 POUNDS, 243 00:13:04,700 --> 00:13:07,233 AND I'VE SEEN A LOT OF POSITIVE CHANGE 244 00:13:07,233 --> 00:13:09,633 IN MY LIFE BECAUSE OF THAT. 245 00:13:09,633 --> 00:13:11,800 WHEN I FIRST STARTED THIS JOURNEY, 246 00:13:11,800 --> 00:13:14,100 I WASN'T ACTIVE AS MUCH. 247 00:13:14,100 --> 00:13:17,900 NOW I HAVE SO MUCH MORE ENERGY THAN I HAD BEFORE, 248 00:13:17,900 --> 00:13:20,267 BUT THERE ARE ALSO SOME NEGATIVE THINGS 249 00:13:20,267 --> 00:13:23,433 ABOUT LOSING A LOT OF WEIGHT. 250 00:13:23,433 --> 00:13:27,733 AND THE BIGGEST ONE WILL BE ALL THE EXCESS SKIN ON MY BODY. 251 00:13:27,733 --> 00:13:30,933 IT'S HEAVY, AND IT MAKES IT DIFFICULT TO WALK, 252 00:13:30,933 --> 00:13:33,300 IT MAKES IT DIFFICULT TO EXERCISE. 253 00:13:33,300 --> 00:13:35,533 IT'S TIRESOME. 254 00:13:35,533 --> 00:13:38,567 THE MORE WEIGHT I LOSE, THE HEAVIER IT GETS, 255 00:13:38,567 --> 00:13:43,500 AND NO MATTER HOW MUCH I DO, ALL THIS SKIN, 256 00:13:43,500 --> 00:13:47,433 IT'S NOT GONNA GO ANYWHERE, SO IT HAS TO BE REMOVED. 257 00:13:47,433 --> 00:13:52,300 THE FIRST STEP IS MY RIGHT INNER THIGH, 258 00:13:52,300 --> 00:13:56,067 BUT DR. NOWZARADAN SAYS IT CAN TAKE UP TO FOUR SURGERIES 259 00:13:56,067 --> 00:13:58,800 TO REMOVE ALL MY EXCESS SKIN. 260 00:13:58,800 --> 00:14:02,600 SO THAT'S WHAT I'M DEDICATING THE NEXT YEAR OF MY LIFE TO -- 261 00:14:02,600 --> 00:14:06,733 LOSING ALL THE WEIGHT I NEED TO GET ALL OF MY SKIN SURGERIES. 262 00:14:06,733 --> 00:14:10,633 BUT I'M NOT LETTING MY EXCESS SKIN STOP ME OR SLOW ME DOWN, 263 00:14:10,633 --> 00:14:13,733 BECAUSE THAT WOULD TAKE ME IN THE OPPOSITE DIRECTION 264 00:14:13,733 --> 00:14:15,567 FROM GETTING SKIN REMOVAL. 265 00:14:17,633 --> 00:14:20,067 MY YEAR LEASE WAS UP ON MY APARTMENT, 266 00:14:20,067 --> 00:14:22,467 SO LAST WEEK, I MOVED TO A NEW PLACE, 267 00:14:22,467 --> 00:14:24,933 AND I PICKED IT FOR TWO MAIN REASONS. 268 00:14:26,967 --> 00:14:29,133 I HAVE TO GO UP AND DOWN A FLIGHT OF STAIRS -- 269 00:14:29,133 --> 00:14:31,367 THAT WILL KEEP ME ACTIVE -- 270 00:14:31,367 --> 00:14:34,233 AND IT HAS REALLY NICE PLACES TO TAKE WALKS. 271 00:14:34,233 --> 00:14:37,933 SO I'M GOING OUT TWICE A DAY RIGHT NOW TO GET THE EXERCISE 272 00:14:37,933 --> 00:14:41,900 I NEED AND TO STAY ACTIVE. 273 00:14:41,900 --> 00:14:43,833 BUT MY BROTHER'S ACTUALLY DELIVERING 274 00:14:43,833 --> 00:14:45,400 ALL MY REALLY BIG ITEMS 275 00:14:45,400 --> 00:14:48,733 AND FURNITURE FROM MY OLD PLACE TODAY. 276 00:14:48,733 --> 00:14:50,567 Jerome: JUNE'S A WHOLE LOT SMALLER THAN BEFORE, 277 00:14:50,567 --> 00:14:52,867 AND SHE'S GETTING AROUND A WHOLE LOT BETTER. 278 00:14:52,867 --> 00:14:54,400 ACTUALLY, I HAVEN'T SEEN HER MOVE LIKE THIS 279 00:14:54,400 --> 00:14:56,867 IN PROBABLY ABOUT FOUR YEARS. 280 00:14:56,867 --> 00:14:59,667 AFTER MY FIRST SKIN SURGERY, I'M HOPING TO BE ABLE 281 00:14:59,667 --> 00:15:03,667 TO WEAR PANTS FOR THE FIRST TIME IN 10 YEARS. 282 00:15:03,667 --> 00:15:07,167 I'M JUST REALLY HAPPY RIGHT NOW ABOUT ALL THE WAYS MY LIFE 283 00:15:07,167 --> 00:15:10,967 IS CHANGING FOR THE BETTER, EVEN WHEN THAT CHANGE IS HARD. 284 00:15:10,967 --> 00:15:15,067 SADI AND I ARE BROKEN UP, BUT WE DECIDED 285 00:15:15,067 --> 00:15:18,400 WE WERE STILL GOING TO LIVE TOGETHER TO COVER THE RENT. 286 00:15:18,400 --> 00:15:21,633 SO SHE MOVED WITH ME, BUT WE'RE JUST FRIENDS NOW. 287 00:15:21,633 --> 00:15:25,533 AND SHE TRAVELS A LOT, SO I DON'T SEE HER AROUND MUCH. 288 00:15:25,533 --> 00:15:29,067 AND I KNOW THIS WHOLE CHANGE BETWEEN US IS NOT JUST 289 00:15:29,067 --> 00:15:32,067 GOOD FOR ME, BUT FOR HER 290 00:15:32,067 --> 00:15:34,367 BECAUSE SHE NO LONGER HAS TO TAKE CARE OF ME 291 00:15:34,367 --> 00:15:37,933 ALL DAY, EVERY DAY AND STAY TRAPPED AT HOME. 292 00:15:37,933 --> 00:15:41,067 AND BECOMING AS INDEPENDENT AS I AM RIGHT NOW 293 00:15:41,067 --> 00:15:42,167 IS ONE OF THE THINGS 294 00:15:42,167 --> 00:15:45,933 I'M MOST PROUD OF FROM THIS PAST YEAR. 295 00:15:45,933 --> 00:15:49,200 I'M DOING IT ALL COMPLETELY ON MY OWN. 296 00:15:49,200 --> 00:15:53,267 AND I DON'T REALLY STRUGGLE WITH OVEREATING RIGHT NOW. 297 00:15:53,267 --> 00:15:55,833 AFTER STARTING TO DEAL WITH A LOT OF THE EMOTIONS 298 00:15:55,833 --> 00:15:58,067 THAT I HAD FROM MY SON'S DEATH, 299 00:15:58,067 --> 00:16:01,067 THE CRAVINGS STARTED TO GET MORE MANAGEABLE. 300 00:16:01,067 --> 00:16:05,567 THEY AREN'T GONE, AND I DON'T THINK THEY EVER WILL BE FULLY, 301 00:16:05,567 --> 00:16:08,867 BUT I FEEL LIKE I'M MORE IN CONTROL NOW 302 00:16:08,867 --> 00:16:13,867 THEN I HAVE BEEN IN A REALLY LONG WHILE. 303 00:16:13,867 --> 00:16:15,933 SO, I'M REALLY EXCITED ABOUT THIS NEXT YEAR 304 00:16:15,933 --> 00:16:18,467 AND EVERYTHING I'M GOING TO ACCOMPLISH. 305 00:16:21,967 --> 00:16:25,067 ** 306 00:16:34,067 --> 00:16:38,733 Dottie: I'M DEVASTATED RIGHT NOW 307 00:16:38,733 --> 00:16:42,567 BECAUSE TODAY I'M BURYING MY SON DANIEL. 308 00:16:49,233 --> 00:16:51,600 WHEN HE WAS BORN, THE DOCTORS DIAGNOSED HIM 309 00:16:51,600 --> 00:16:54,067 WITH CEREBRAL PALSY, 310 00:16:54,067 --> 00:16:57,167 AND THEY TOLD ME HE ONLY HAD FIVE YEARS TO LIVE. 311 00:16:59,167 --> 00:17:03,467 I GOT 13 YEARS WITH HIM BECAUSE I NEVER LEFT HIS SIDE 312 00:17:03,467 --> 00:17:07,300 AND I MADE SURE HE WAS ALWAYS OKAY. 313 00:17:07,300 --> 00:17:10,933 BUT I STILL THOUGHT I WOULD HAVE MORE TIME WITH HIM. 314 00:17:10,933 --> 00:17:13,067 HE WAS MY LIFE. 315 00:17:13,067 --> 00:17:17,667 ALMOST EVERY MOMENT I HAD I GAVE TO MAKING SURE HE WAS OKAY, 316 00:17:17,667 --> 00:17:20,067 AND THAT NOTHING HAPPENED TO HIM. 317 00:17:20,067 --> 00:17:23,300 BUT LAST WEEK, HE JUST STARTED TO GET WORSE, 318 00:17:23,300 --> 00:17:25,600 AND WE RUSHED HIM TO THE HOSPITAL. 319 00:17:25,600 --> 00:17:28,233 BUT THERE WAS JUST NOTHING THEY COULD DO. 320 00:17:28,233 --> 00:17:30,867 THERE WAS ALWAYS A POINT THAT DOTTIE KNEW 321 00:17:30,867 --> 00:17:33,233 AND A DAY THAT SHE DREADED -- THAT ONE DAY 322 00:17:33,233 --> 00:17:36,267 THAT DANIEL WOULDN'T COME HOME FROM THE HOSPITAL. 323 00:17:36,267 --> 00:17:41,467 BUT RIGHT NOW, MY CONCERN IS FOR THIS NOT TO BE A SETBACK FOR HER 324 00:17:41,467 --> 00:17:46,067 AND A REASON TO USE FOOD AS A WAY TO GRIEVE. 325 00:17:48,333 --> 00:17:51,067 Dottie: I LOVED HIM AS MUCH AS ANY HUMAN BEING 326 00:17:51,067 --> 00:17:53,200 COULD LOVE ANOTHER PERSON, 327 00:17:53,200 --> 00:17:55,767 AND ONE OF THE LAST THINGS THAT I PROMISED DANIEL 328 00:17:55,767 --> 00:17:58,233 WAS THAT HIS MAMA WAS GONNA GET HEALTHY, 329 00:17:58,233 --> 00:18:00,433 THAT I WAS DOING THIS FOR HIM 330 00:18:00,433 --> 00:18:04,167 AND THAT NOTHING WAS GONNA STOP ME. 331 00:18:04,167 --> 00:18:08,533 BUT I'M SCARED, BECAUSE I KNOW THERE ARE MOMENTS COMING 332 00:18:08,533 --> 00:18:11,300 WHERE ALL THE EMOTION AND GRAVITY OF THIS 333 00:18:11,300 --> 00:18:15,300 IS GOING TO HIT ME, AND I DON'T KNOW HOW I'M GONNA HANDLE IT. 334 00:18:20,067 --> 00:18:23,067 ** 335 00:18:26,767 --> 00:18:28,267 June: I'M HERE TO SEE DR. NOWZARADAN 336 00:18:28,267 --> 00:18:30,167 FOR MY NEXT APPOINTMENT 337 00:18:30,167 --> 00:18:34,200 AND HOPEFULLY GET MY SKIN-REMOVAL SURGERY. 338 00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:35,900 JUNE McCAMEY. 339 00:18:35,900 --> 00:18:38,333 MY LAST WEIGHT WAS 389 POUNDS, 340 00:18:38,333 --> 00:18:41,633 AND I NEED TO HAVE GOTTEN BELOW 350 TO BE WHERE 341 00:18:41,633 --> 00:18:44,900 DR. NOW SAYS I'LL BE READY FOR THE SURGERY. 342 00:18:44,900 --> 00:18:49,067 I KNOW I'VE WORKED HARD, SO I'M HOPING I HIT THAT GOAL 343 00:18:49,067 --> 00:18:52,400 AND THE SCALE IS GOING TO SHOW I'M UNDER THAT NUMBER. 344 00:18:54,367 --> 00:18:56,833 352. 345 00:18:56,833 --> 00:18:58,067 GREAT. 346 00:19:00,833 --> 00:19:04,167 NOT EXACTLY AS LOW AS I WAS HOPING, BUT IT'S SO, SO CLOSE 347 00:19:04,167 --> 00:19:06,267 THAT I FEEL GOOD ABOUT IT, 348 00:19:06,267 --> 00:19:08,600 AND HOPEFULLY DR. NOW DOES, TOO. 349 00:19:08,600 --> 00:19:11,800 I DEFINITELY WANT THE SKIN SURGERY ON MY THIGHS RIGHT NOW. 350 00:19:11,800 --> 00:19:14,700 IT'S PIVOTAL FOR ME IN MY PROGRESS. 351 00:19:14,700 --> 00:19:17,633 IT'S HINDERING ME RIGHT NOW, SO I NEED IT DONE. 352 00:19:17,633 --> 00:19:18,967 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 353 00:19:18,967 --> 00:19:19,967 HEY, JUNE. 354 00:19:19,967 --> 00:19:21,600 HEY, DR. NOW. HOW ARE YOU? 355 00:19:21,600 --> 00:19:23,567 I'M DOING OKAY. HOW ABOUT YOURSELF? 356 00:19:23,567 --> 00:19:25,467 I'M DOING GREAT. 357 00:19:25,467 --> 00:19:29,333 SO, YOU'RE DOWN TO 350 POUNDS ALMOST? 358 00:19:29,333 --> 00:19:30,733 YES, SIR. 359 00:19:30,733 --> 00:19:33,633 OKAY, YOU'RE STAYING ON TRACK, AND THAT'S GREAT. 360 00:19:33,633 --> 00:19:37,600 SO, HOW IS YOUR WALKING? HOW IS YOUR LEVEL OF ACTIVITY? 361 00:19:37,600 --> 00:19:41,867 EVERYTHING'S GOING PRETTY GOOD EXCEPT FOR MY INNER THIGHS. 362 00:19:41,867 --> 00:19:43,600 HOW'S THE EXCESS SKIN FEEL? 363 00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:46,500 WHEN I'M WALKING, THEY'RE HEAVY. 364 00:19:46,500 --> 00:19:49,067 IT WEARS ME DOWN JUST A LITTLE BIT MORE. 365 00:19:49,067 --> 00:19:51,533 LET ME TAKE A LOOK. 366 00:19:53,867 --> 00:19:57,467 IT'S STARTING TO LOOK LIKE IT'S HANGING VERY LOW 367 00:19:57,467 --> 00:19:59,900 AND BEGINNING TO GET UNCOMFORTABLE. 368 00:19:59,900 --> 00:20:02,333 YEAH. YEAH, IT IS. 369 00:20:02,333 --> 00:20:04,800 ESPECIALLY THE RIGHT LEG IS WORSE THAN THE LEFT, HUH? 370 00:20:04,800 --> 00:20:06,800 YEAH, THE RIGHT LEG IS DEFINITELY WORSE 371 00:20:06,800 --> 00:20:08,333 THAN THE LEFT SIDE, DEFINITELY, 372 00:20:08,333 --> 00:20:10,500 BECAUSE WHEN I'M WALKING -- 373 00:20:10,500 --> 00:20:13,233 AS YOU SEE, THAT, ALL THIS RIGHT IN HERE... 374 00:20:13,233 --> 00:20:14,233 MM-HMM. 375 00:20:14,233 --> 00:20:16,033 ...IS REALLY DOING IT. 376 00:20:16,033 --> 00:20:17,867 Dr. Nowzaradan: JUNE HAS DONE VERY WELL. 377 00:20:17,867 --> 00:20:21,833 SHE'S COME A LONG WAY FROM JUST UNDER 600 POUNDS. 378 00:20:21,833 --> 00:20:26,567 AND MY HOPE WAS THAT IF SHE HIT THAT 350-POUND MARK, 379 00:20:26,567 --> 00:20:29,533 THAT SHE'LL BE READY FOR EXCESS SKIN REMOVAL. 380 00:20:29,533 --> 00:20:32,700 BUT SHE'S STILL NOT READY BECAUSE SHE STILL HAS 381 00:20:32,700 --> 00:20:34,800 TOO MUCH FAT AROUND HER LEGS. 382 00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:40,400 THAT MAKES IT FAR MORE LIKELY TO HAVE ISSUES HEALING PROPERTY. 383 00:20:40,400 --> 00:20:44,133 SO SHE'S GOING TO HAVE TO LOSE MORE WEIGHT. 384 00:20:44,133 --> 00:20:47,333 I KNOW THIS IS GOING TO BE DISAPPOINTING TO HER, 385 00:20:47,333 --> 00:20:50,100 BUT WE HAVE TO BE SAFE. 386 00:20:50,100 --> 00:20:52,267 I KNOW YOU'VE GOT A LOT OF EXTRA SKIN, 387 00:20:52,267 --> 00:20:54,833 AND I WAS HOPING THAT YOU'LL BE READY 388 00:20:54,833 --> 00:20:58,200 FOR YOUR FIRST EXCESS SKIN-REMOVAL AT THIS POINT, 389 00:20:58,200 --> 00:21:01,600 BUT IT'S LOOKING LIKE YOU STILL HAVE TO MUCH FAT 390 00:21:01,600 --> 00:21:06,067 IN THAT AREA TO SAFELY PERFORM YOUR SKIN-REMOVAL SURGERY. 391 00:21:06,067 --> 00:21:09,900 SO I WANTED TO STAY ON TRACK AND LOSE ANOTHER 50 POUNDS 392 00:21:09,900 --> 00:21:13,300 TO GET BELOW 300 BY YOUR NEXT APPOINTMENT. 393 00:21:13,300 --> 00:21:15,433 OKAY, SO YOU WANT ME TO WAIT SO I GET TO 300 394 00:21:15,433 --> 00:21:17,100 FOR THE THIGHS, AS WELL? 395 00:21:17,100 --> 00:21:18,567 RIGHT. OKAY. 396 00:21:18,567 --> 00:21:22,300 I'M CONFIDENT IF YOU DO THAT, YOU WILL BE READY THEN. 397 00:21:22,300 --> 00:21:23,600 OKAY. 398 00:21:23,600 --> 00:21:25,400 I'M SORRY FOR THE DELAY. 399 00:21:25,400 --> 00:21:26,667 ALL RIGHT. 400 00:21:26,667 --> 00:21:29,600 JUST STAY ON TRACK AND KEEP MAKING PROGRESS, 401 00:21:29,600 --> 00:21:31,100 AND YOU'LL GET THERE. 402 00:21:31,100 --> 00:21:32,100 OKAY. 403 00:21:32,100 --> 00:21:33,667 YOU HAVE DONE GREAT. 404 00:21:33,667 --> 00:21:35,667 I'LL SEE YOU IN A COUPLE MONTHS. 405 00:21:35,667 --> 00:21:36,667 AWESOME. 406 00:21:36,667 --> 00:21:37,733 ALL RIGHT, I'LL SEE YOU THEN. 407 00:21:37,733 --> 00:21:40,267 ALL RIGHT. 408 00:21:43,300 --> 00:21:45,700 June: THERE'S A PART OF ME THAT WANTS TO BE 409 00:21:45,700 --> 00:21:47,767 REALLY FRUSTRATED RIGHT NOW 410 00:21:47,767 --> 00:21:50,833 BECAUSE I WANT THIS EXCESS SKIN GONE. 411 00:21:50,833 --> 00:21:55,233 IT'S BECOME EXTREMELY PAINFUL, ESPECIALLY ON MY RIGHT LEG. 412 00:21:55,233 --> 00:21:57,600 BUT IF THE DOCTOR SAYS IT'S NOT SAFE YET, 413 00:21:57,600 --> 00:21:59,567 THEN I UNDERSTAND THAT. 414 00:21:59,567 --> 00:22:01,567 I DEFINITELY DON'T WANT TO DO ANYTHING 415 00:22:01,567 --> 00:22:06,200 BEFORE IT'S AS SAFE AS IT CAN BE, 416 00:22:06,200 --> 00:22:09,333 ESPECIALLY A SURGERY LIKE THIS. 417 00:22:09,333 --> 00:22:12,067 AND I KNOW THAT MY SON IS WATCHING OVER ME 418 00:22:12,067 --> 00:22:14,200 AND HE'S PROUD OF ME, 419 00:22:14,200 --> 00:22:17,567 SO I'M NOT LETTING MYSELF GET OFF TRACK 420 00:22:17,567 --> 00:22:20,533 OR DO ANYTHING TO MESS UP THIS CHANCE. 421 00:22:22,267 --> 00:22:25,300 ** 422 00:22:35,333 --> 00:22:39,133 Dottie: IT'S BEEN ONE MONTH SINCE DANIEL PASSED, 423 00:22:39,133 --> 00:22:42,900 AND I'M STILL JUST TRYING TO COPE WITH IT ALL. 424 00:22:42,900 --> 00:22:45,700 I JUST STILL CAN'T BELIEVE HE'S GONE. 425 00:22:45,700 --> 00:22:48,267 IT'S STILL NOT REAL TO ME. 426 00:22:48,267 --> 00:22:53,300 AND THEN THERE'S MOMENTS IT IS, AND I FEEL LIKE I CAN'T GO ON 427 00:22:53,300 --> 00:22:56,167 UNTIL I PULL MYSELF TOGETHER. 428 00:22:56,167 --> 00:23:00,167 THIS WAS DANIEL'S FOOTPRINT THAT THEY MADE AT THE HOSPITAL. 429 00:23:00,167 --> 00:23:02,767 WITH THE MEMORIAL TABLE, I'VE PUT UP PICTURES 430 00:23:02,767 --> 00:23:04,333 AND DIFFERENT REMINDERS. 431 00:23:04,333 --> 00:23:06,500 I STILL HAVE A COUPLE THINGS TO ADD, 432 00:23:06,500 --> 00:23:08,067 BUT I REALLY LIKE IT. 433 00:23:08,067 --> 00:23:10,633 IT'S SOMETHING THAT'S MEANINGFUL TO ME, 434 00:23:10,633 --> 00:23:12,867 AND, YOU KNOW, TO OUR FAMILY. 435 00:23:12,867 --> 00:23:16,067 MOST DAYS, I HAVE TO JUST REMIND MYSELF 436 00:23:16,067 --> 00:23:18,267 THAT LANDON STILL NEEDS ME, 437 00:23:18,267 --> 00:23:19,733 SO I REALLY DON'T HAVE TIME 438 00:23:19,733 --> 00:23:22,167 TO FALL APART AND MOURN RIGHT NOW. 439 00:23:22,167 --> 00:23:26,367 SO I JUST DEAL WITH IT ALL WHEN I HAVE THE TIME. 440 00:23:26,367 --> 00:23:30,067 AND WHEN I REALLY START TO STRUGGLE AND I WANT TO GIVE IN 441 00:23:30,067 --> 00:23:33,067 AND RUN TO SOMETHING I'M CRAVING, 442 00:23:33,067 --> 00:23:36,967 I REMIND MYSELF OF MY PROMISES TO DANIEL, 443 00:23:36,967 --> 00:23:40,900 AND GIVING IN WOULD BETRAY HIM AND HIS MEMORY. 444 00:23:40,900 --> 00:23:44,067 SO I'M STICKING WITH IT RIGHT NOW. 445 00:23:44,067 --> 00:23:47,433 NO MATTER HOW MUCH I STRUGGLE, I'M NOT RUNNING TO FOOD. 446 00:23:53,500 --> 00:23:58,800 YOU EAT YOUR S'ghettiOs, AND MAMA'S EATING A PROTEIN SHAKE. 447 00:23:58,800 --> 00:24:02,767 I MISSED MY LAST APPOINTMENT WITH DR. NOWZARADAN THIS MONTH. 448 00:24:05,167 --> 00:24:09,700 WITH EVERYTHING GOING ON, IT WAS JUST TOO HARD TO MAKE IT. 449 00:24:09,700 --> 00:24:10,933 BUT I CALLED HIS OFFICE, 450 00:24:10,933 --> 00:24:13,067 AND THEY SET ANOTHER ONE FOR ME IN A FEW WEEKS. 451 00:24:13,067 --> 00:24:17,133 ARE YOU READY TO GET OUT AND GET CLEANED UP? 452 00:24:17,133 --> 00:24:20,967 SO I'M WORKING HARD TO LOSE AS MUCH AS I CAN, 453 00:24:20,967 --> 00:24:23,200 BUT THERE ARE MOMENTS WHEN THE REALITY 454 00:24:23,200 --> 00:24:25,767 OF EVERYTHING STARTS TO SET IN. 455 00:24:25,767 --> 00:24:28,867 AND THOSE ARE THE HARDEST MOMENTS, 456 00:24:28,867 --> 00:24:31,333 BECAUSE WHEN THAT STRESS USED TO HIT ME 457 00:24:31,333 --> 00:24:35,900 AND I STARTED TO FEEL OVERWHELMED, 458 00:24:35,900 --> 00:24:38,400 I WOULD JUST EAT AS MUCH AS I CAN. 459 00:24:41,767 --> 00:24:45,567 BUT I HAVE TO REMIND MYSELF I CAN'T GIVE IN, 460 00:24:45,567 --> 00:24:47,833 BECAUSE I PROMISED I WOULDN'T. 461 00:24:47,833 --> 00:24:50,067 WHO IS THAT? 462 00:24:50,067 --> 00:24:52,067 WHO IS THAT? 463 00:24:52,067 --> 00:24:54,133 WHO IS THAT? 464 00:24:57,733 --> 00:25:00,533 I KNOW DANIEL WOULD STILL WANT ME TO STAY ON TRACK 465 00:25:00,533 --> 00:25:02,267 AND NOT GIVE UP 466 00:25:02,267 --> 00:25:05,067 AND DO THE THINGS THAT I'M SUPPOSED TO DO. 467 00:25:05,067 --> 00:25:08,233 BUT THERE ARE TIMES WHEN THE PAIN JUST GETS OVERWHELMING, 468 00:25:08,233 --> 00:25:13,500 SO I HAVE TO STEP OUTSIDE FOR A BIT TO COLLECT MYSELF. 469 00:25:13,500 --> 00:25:16,733 I HAVE TO GET HEALTHY, AND I HAVE TO HOLD IT TOGETHER 470 00:25:16,733 --> 00:25:20,700 FOR MY YOUNGER SON, LANDON, AND FOR MY HUSBAND. 471 00:25:20,700 --> 00:25:24,767 THEY NEED ME, SO I HAVE TO JUST KEEP MOVING, 472 00:25:24,767 --> 00:25:27,367 AND I CAN'T GIVE INTO THE PAIN. 473 00:25:27,367 --> 00:25:30,133 THERE'S TOO MUCH TO DO RIGHT NOW FOR THAT. 474 00:25:31,333 --> 00:25:34,367 ** 475 00:25:39,667 --> 00:25:44,133 June: I'VE BEEN WORKING HARD, AND I'VE BEEN STAYING ACTIVE 476 00:25:44,133 --> 00:25:46,733 WALKING OUTSIDE TWICE A DAY. 477 00:25:46,733 --> 00:25:49,967 IT FEELS GOOD TO GO FOR A WALK, BUT IT'S GETTING A LITTLE HARDER 478 00:25:49,967 --> 00:25:54,133 KEEPING UP WITH IT BECAUSE THE EXCESS SKIN ON MY LEGS 479 00:25:54,133 --> 00:25:57,233 IS HURTING MORE AND MORE. 480 00:25:57,233 --> 00:25:58,533 AND IT'S GETTING TO THE POINT 481 00:25:58,533 --> 00:26:03,500 WHERE IT'S HARD TO STAY AS ACTIVE AS I WANT. 482 00:26:03,500 --> 00:26:06,633 I'M STILL PUSHING MYSELF, 483 00:26:06,633 --> 00:26:10,633 BUT I'M WONDERING IF I'M ACTUALLY DOING TOO MUCH 484 00:26:10,633 --> 00:26:14,467 AND MAYBE I'M CAUSING IT ALL TO CHAFE. 485 00:26:14,467 --> 00:26:19,800 OR MAYBE I'M MAKING IT WORSE WITH HOW MUCH I'M MOVING. 486 00:26:19,800 --> 00:26:23,200 BUT I DON'T WANT TO SLOW DOWN. 487 00:26:23,200 --> 00:26:26,267 AND I'M AMAZED AT HOW, IN JUST OVER A YEAR, 488 00:26:26,267 --> 00:26:29,200 MY LIFE IS ALMOST COMPLETELY DIFFERENT, 489 00:26:29,200 --> 00:26:31,633 AND I DON'T WANT THAT TO CHANGE. 490 00:26:31,633 --> 00:26:34,500 BUT SO FAR, I'VE SHORTENED MY WALK SOME 491 00:26:34,500 --> 00:26:37,133 TO DEAL WITH THE PAIN FROM MY EXCESS SKIN. 492 00:26:42,167 --> 00:26:44,500 BUT WITH MY DECREASED ACTIVITY, 493 00:26:44,500 --> 00:26:48,067 I'M TRYING TO EAT EVEN LESS TO COMPENSATE A LITTLE. 494 00:26:48,067 --> 00:26:50,800 THERE ARE DAYS IT'S A LITTLE TOUGH, 495 00:26:50,800 --> 00:26:52,833 AND I DO HAVE CRAVINGS. 496 00:26:52,833 --> 00:26:56,300 BUT I HAVE NO DESIRE TO EAT LIKE I DID. 497 00:26:56,300 --> 00:26:59,133 THERE WERE TIMES LAST YEAR BEFORE MY SURGERY 498 00:26:59,133 --> 00:27:03,133 WHERE I WOULD FILL MY PLATE COMPLETELY, FINISH IT ALL, 499 00:27:03,133 --> 00:27:06,567 AND THEN GO BACK FOR MORE. 500 00:27:06,567 --> 00:27:07,800 BUT I'M NOT GIVING IN, 501 00:27:07,800 --> 00:27:10,800 BECAUSE I'M DETERMINED TO GET THIS SURGERY. 502 00:27:10,800 --> 00:27:12,833 AND IF I DON'T GET IT NEXT MONTH, 503 00:27:12,833 --> 00:27:15,200 I KNOW IT'S GOING TO START TO REALLY AFFECT 504 00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:18,233 MY ABILITY TO GET AROUND, 505 00:27:18,233 --> 00:27:20,800 AND I DON'T WANT TO EVER GET TO THAT PLACE AGAIN 506 00:27:20,800 --> 00:27:24,233 WHERE I START SITTING AROUND ALL DAY AGAIN. 507 00:27:24,233 --> 00:27:26,600 I REFUSE TO GO BACK TO THAT LIFE. 508 00:27:26,600 --> 00:27:30,533 SO I'M WORKING REALLY HARD TO HIT MY GOAL BY THE NEXT VISIT. 509 00:27:32,533 --> 00:27:35,567 ** 510 00:27:39,600 --> 00:27:42,633 I'M HERE AT DR. NOW'S OFFICE TO SEE IF I LOST THE WEIGHT 511 00:27:42,633 --> 00:27:46,267 I WAS SUPPOSED TO, AND I'M A LITTLE NERVOUS. 512 00:27:46,267 --> 00:27:48,133 IT STARTED TO GET HARDER AND HARDER 513 00:27:48,133 --> 00:27:49,667 TO KEEP UP WITH MY ACTIVITY. 514 00:27:49,667 --> 00:27:52,067 JUNE McCAMEY. 515 00:27:52,067 --> 00:27:54,967 THE PAIN STARTED TO GET UNBEARABLE AT TIMES, 516 00:27:54,967 --> 00:27:57,300 SO I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN WAIT 517 00:27:57,300 --> 00:28:00,267 ANOTHER TWO MONTHS TO GET APPROVED. 518 00:28:00,267 --> 00:28:02,400 I REALLY HOPE I LOST ENOUGH WEIGHT 519 00:28:02,400 --> 00:28:05,167 BECAUSE I NEED THIS SURGERY NOW. 520 00:28:11,333 --> 00:28:14,367 ** 521 00:28:19,067 --> 00:28:21,100 June: I'M HERE FOR MY APPOINTMENT WITH DR. NOW, 522 00:28:21,100 --> 00:28:24,067 AND I'M EXTREMELY NERVOUS BECAUSE I REALLY HOPE 523 00:28:24,067 --> 00:28:25,867 I'VE MADE IT BELOW 300 POUNDS 524 00:28:25,867 --> 00:28:29,100 TO GET APPROVED FOR MY FIRST EXCESS SKIN-REMOVAL. 525 00:28:29,100 --> 00:28:33,067 SO THAT'S THE NUMBER I'M HOPING TO SEE. 526 00:28:33,067 --> 00:28:35,233 Nurse: 320. 527 00:28:35,233 --> 00:28:36,900 OKAY. 528 00:28:36,900 --> 00:28:38,933 AMEN. 529 00:28:38,933 --> 00:28:42,667 THAT'S NOT AS MUCH PROGRESS AS I HAD HOPED, 530 00:28:42,667 --> 00:28:45,833 BUT IT'S STILL OVER A 30-POUND LOSS, 531 00:28:45,833 --> 00:28:49,300 AND I'M STILL HOPING DR. NOW SEES HOW HARD I'M TRYING 532 00:28:49,300 --> 00:28:51,367 AND HOW MUCH I NEED TO GET THIS SURGERY 533 00:28:51,367 --> 00:28:53,067 TO KEEP MAKING PROGRESS. 534 00:28:53,067 --> 00:28:55,767 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 535 00:28:55,767 --> 00:28:57,600 HELLO. HEY. 536 00:28:57,600 --> 00:28:59,333 HOW ARE YOU TODAY? 537 00:28:59,333 --> 00:29:01,067 I'M OKAY. HOW ARE YOU DOING? 538 00:29:01,067 --> 00:29:02,067 ALL RIGHT. 539 00:29:02,067 --> 00:29:05,700 SO YOU ARE DOWN TO 320. 540 00:29:05,700 --> 00:29:06,900 YES, SIR. 541 00:29:06,900 --> 00:29:08,900 HOW'S YOUR EATING HABIT COMING ALONG? 542 00:29:08,900 --> 00:29:11,433 SOMETIMES I DON'T HAVE NO APPETITE, TO BE HONEST, 543 00:29:11,433 --> 00:29:13,400 AND SOMETIMES I DO EAT. 544 00:29:15,100 --> 00:29:17,133 I EAT SOME OF THAT WHEN I DON'T SUPPOSED TO. 545 00:29:17,133 --> 00:29:19,067 WHEN I DON'T EAT, I'LL EAT SOME FRUIT 546 00:29:19,067 --> 00:29:21,333 AND I SHOULDN'T HAVE IT, AND I KNOW THAT. 547 00:29:21,333 --> 00:29:24,433 YOU SHOULD BE DOWN TO AROUND 300 TODAY 548 00:29:24,433 --> 00:29:27,767 AND EASILY BE LOSING 25 POUNDS A MONTH. 549 00:29:27,767 --> 00:29:30,067 I AGREE. I'M NOT GONNA ARGUE WITH IT. 550 00:29:30,067 --> 00:29:33,333 YOU'RE COMPROMISING MORE THAN YOU REALIZE RIGHT NOW, 551 00:29:33,333 --> 00:29:36,733 SO THIS IS AN ISSUE THAT WE NEED TO RESOLVE, 552 00:29:36,733 --> 00:29:39,167 BECAUSE MY CONCERN IS IN FIVE YEARS, 553 00:29:39,167 --> 00:29:42,833 YOU'RE GONNA BE BACK TO 500, 600 POUNDS. 554 00:29:42,833 --> 00:29:44,733 BUT SURGERY'S NOT A QUICK FIX. 555 00:29:44,733 --> 00:29:47,467 IT WAS NEVER PUT ON JUST LIKE THAT. 556 00:29:47,467 --> 00:29:50,267 SO IT'S SUPPOSED TO COME OFF JUST LIKE THAT? 557 00:29:50,267 --> 00:29:51,867 EVERYBODY'S NOT THE SAME. 558 00:29:51,867 --> 00:29:53,800 EVERYBODY IS NOT THE SAME. 559 00:29:53,800 --> 00:29:55,633 BUT MATH IS THE SAME, 560 00:29:55,633 --> 00:29:59,267 AND EVERYBODY HAS A PARALLEL PATTERN OF WEIGHT LOSS. 561 00:29:59,267 --> 00:30:02,233 I'M NOT EVERYBODY ELSE, AND EVERYBODY ELSE IS NOT ME. 562 00:30:02,233 --> 00:30:05,000 JUNE, THERE ARE THINGS THAT I'M WRONG ABOUT. 563 00:30:05,000 --> 00:30:08,667 WEIGHT LOSS IS RARELY ONE OF THEM. 564 00:30:08,667 --> 00:30:11,833 JUNE IS STARTING TO MAKE CHOICES THAT WILL LEAD HER 565 00:30:11,833 --> 00:30:14,333 TO A VERY DANGEROUS PLACE. 566 00:30:14,333 --> 00:30:17,000 I'M GLAD SHE'S STILL MAKING PROGRESS, 567 00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:19,900 BUT THE WRITING ON THE WALL IS THAT SHE'S STARTING 568 00:30:19,900 --> 00:30:22,433 TO COMPROMISE A LITTLE BIT HERE AND THERE, 569 00:30:22,433 --> 00:30:24,500 AND THAT'S GOING TO CONTINUE TO LEAD 570 00:30:24,500 --> 00:30:26,433 TO EVEN MORE COMPROMISE, 571 00:30:26,433 --> 00:30:30,567 AND HER WEIGHT LOSS IS GOING TO SLOW DOWN EVEN MORE, 572 00:30:30,567 --> 00:30:33,067 AND THEN IT WILL STOP ALTOGETHER 573 00:30:33,067 --> 00:30:36,300 RIGHT BEFORE SHE BEGINS TO GAIN AGAIN. 574 00:30:36,300 --> 00:30:39,133 YOU WANT TO TRY ME AND TEST ME, GO AHEAD. 575 00:30:39,133 --> 00:30:41,400 BUT I HOPE YOU LISTEN TO ME INSTEAD 576 00:30:41,400 --> 00:30:43,933 BECAUSE I WANT THE SAME THING YOU DO -- 577 00:30:43,933 --> 00:30:46,767 TO GET YOU HEALTHY, AND THAT'S MY JOB. 578 00:30:46,767 --> 00:30:48,467 BUT YOU WANT ME TO LOSE 20 POUNDS A MONTH. 579 00:30:48,467 --> 00:30:51,433 IS THAT YOUR GOAL FOR -- WELL, YOU FEEL LIKE IT NEEDS 580 00:30:51,433 --> 00:30:54,800 TO BE MORE REALISTIC, SO LOSE 10 POUNDS A MONTH. 581 00:30:54,800 --> 00:30:57,767 THEN YOU'LL BE DOWN TO WHERE YOU NEED TO BE 582 00:30:57,767 --> 00:31:01,633 FOR SKIN-REMOVAL SURGERY IF YOU WANT TO FOCUS ON THAT. 583 00:31:01,633 --> 00:31:03,333 HEY, I CAN ROLL WITH IT. 584 00:31:03,333 --> 00:31:08,133 SO GET BELOW 300 POUNDS, THEN WE'LL GO FROM THERE. 585 00:31:08,133 --> 00:31:09,133 OKAY? 586 00:31:09,133 --> 00:31:10,700 THAT'S FAIR. ALL RIGHT. 587 00:31:10,700 --> 00:31:12,900 I'LL SEE YOU SOON. 588 00:31:12,900 --> 00:31:16,233 JUNE IS IN A LITTLE BIT OF DENIAL ABOUT 589 00:31:16,233 --> 00:31:18,733 WHY HER WEIGHT LOSS IS SLOWING. 590 00:31:18,733 --> 00:31:21,767 AND MY CONCERN IS AT HER NEXT APPOINTMENT, 591 00:31:21,767 --> 00:31:23,833 SHE WILL HAVE LOST EVEN LESS. 592 00:31:23,833 --> 00:31:27,667 BUT IF SHE GETS DOWN TO AT LEAST AROUND 300 POUNDS, 593 00:31:27,667 --> 00:31:30,367 THEN I WILL APPROVE HER FOR SKIN REMOVAL. 594 00:31:30,367 --> 00:31:32,300 BUT IF SHE DOESN'T HIT HER GOAL, 595 00:31:32,300 --> 00:31:35,200 THEN SHE'S GOING TO STOP LOSING WEIGHT SOON 596 00:31:35,200 --> 00:31:37,133 AND BEGIN TO GAIN AGAIN, 597 00:31:37,133 --> 00:31:39,233 AND THAT WILL BE A SITUATION 598 00:31:39,233 --> 00:31:42,867 THAT IS GOING TO BE EXTREMELY DIFFICULT TO TURN AROUND. 599 00:31:45,433 --> 00:31:47,200 June: I FEEL LIKE I'VE BEEN WORKING HARD, 600 00:31:47,200 --> 00:31:48,867 AND I'M PROVING MYSELF 601 00:31:48,867 --> 00:31:51,633 BECAUSE I'M NOT LIKE EVERYONE ELSE. 602 00:31:51,633 --> 00:31:54,800 I'M ME, AND I KNOW WHAT I CAN DO. 603 00:31:54,800 --> 00:31:58,100 BUT NO MATTER WHAT, I'M NOT FALLING SHORT OF ANY OF MY GOALS 604 00:31:58,100 --> 00:32:01,200 OR LOSING ANY OF MY MOTIVATION. 605 00:32:01,200 --> 00:32:03,767 SO I'M GOING TO DO WHAT I HAVE TO DO. 606 00:32:03,767 --> 00:32:06,467 IT MAY NOT BE HOW DR. NOW WANTS IT, 607 00:32:06,467 --> 00:32:08,733 BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN I'M LETTING UP. 608 00:32:11,867 --> 00:32:14,900 ** 609 00:32:18,700 --> 00:32:21,167 Dottie: WE'RE HERE AT A SPEECH THERAPIST FOR LANDON. 610 00:32:21,167 --> 00:32:22,767 ...MAMA'S HAND. 611 00:32:22,767 --> 00:32:25,933 FOR WHATEVER REASON, HE HASN'T REALLY BEEN TALKING... 612 00:32:25,933 --> 00:32:27,067 COME ON. 613 00:32:27,067 --> 00:32:28,700 ...AND WE DON'T KNOW WHY. 614 00:32:28,700 --> 00:32:30,333 WOW. 615 00:32:30,333 --> 00:32:33,100 I KNOW WITH TAKING CARE OF DANIEL ALL THESE YEARS, 616 00:32:33,100 --> 00:32:35,433 HE'S MOSTLY BEEN AROUND HIM, 617 00:32:35,433 --> 00:32:37,800 AND DANIEL WASN'T ABLE TO TALK MUCH. 618 00:32:37,800 --> 00:32:39,067 Woman: YOU CAN JUST HAVE A SEAT, 619 00:32:39,067 --> 00:32:40,400 AND MS. HEATHER WILL OVER IN JUST A MOMENT. 620 00:32:40,400 --> 00:32:41,500 OKAY. 621 00:32:41,500 --> 00:32:42,867 Dottie: SO WE DON'T KNOW IF IT'S BECAUSE 622 00:32:42,867 --> 00:32:45,100 HE HASN'T HAD THE CHANCE TO BE SOCIAL, 623 00:32:45,100 --> 00:32:47,400 IF HE JUST DOESN'T WANT TO TALK RIGHT NOW, 624 00:32:47,400 --> 00:32:50,400 OR IF SOMETHING'S WRONG. 625 00:32:50,400 --> 00:32:52,300 BUT I'M REALLY WORRIED ABOUT HIM. 626 00:32:52,300 --> 00:32:54,933 Heather: HEY, LANDON, YOU READY TO GO? 627 00:32:54,933 --> 00:32:56,233 COME PLAY WITH ME? 628 00:32:58,733 --> 00:33:00,100 YEAH, BACK THERE. LET'S GO. 629 00:33:00,100 --> 00:33:02,267 Dottie: AND MAYBE LANDON NEEDS ME TO BE AROUND 630 00:33:02,267 --> 00:33:05,933 AND CARE FOR HIM A LOT MORE THAN I REALIZE. 631 00:33:05,933 --> 00:33:09,433 I'M JUST FEELING MORE LOST THAN EVER NOW, 632 00:33:09,433 --> 00:33:12,333 AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. 633 00:33:12,333 --> 00:33:17,300 MY FAMILY IS MY WHOLE LIFE, AND THEY NEED ME RIGHT NOW. 634 00:33:17,300 --> 00:33:18,367 COME ON. 635 00:33:18,367 --> 00:33:19,600 ALL RIGHT, LET'S GO. 636 00:33:19,600 --> 00:33:22,233 HE'S REALLY OFF. 637 00:33:23,300 --> 00:33:25,133 Dottie: SO, I HAD TO SKIP MY APPOINTMENT 638 00:33:25,133 --> 00:33:26,900 WITH DR. NOWZARADAN AGAIN. 639 00:33:26,900 --> 00:33:29,333 I JUST DON'T HAVE TIME RIGHT NOW. 640 00:33:29,333 --> 00:33:33,967 WELL, FIXING TO GO TAKE A WALK. 641 00:33:33,967 --> 00:33:35,300 THIS IS JUST A HARD TIME. 642 00:33:35,300 --> 00:33:37,300 I'LL SIT OVER HERE. 643 00:33:37,300 --> 00:33:41,600 WITH LANDON NEEDING MY ATTENTION AND TAKING CARE OF MY FAMILY, 644 00:33:41,600 --> 00:33:44,600 THERE'S JUST TOO MUCH TO DO RIGHT NOW. 645 00:33:44,600 --> 00:33:47,800 I WANT TO KEEP LOSING WEIGHT, BUT I'M NOT SURE 646 00:33:47,800 --> 00:33:52,400 I CAN KEEP UP WITH WORKING OUT AND STAYING AS ACTIVE AS I WANT 647 00:33:52,400 --> 00:33:55,900 AND MAKE EVERY DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT, 648 00:33:55,900 --> 00:33:58,933 AND I KNOW I HAVE TO FIND A BALANCE. 649 00:33:58,933 --> 00:34:03,267 FAMILY HAS TO ALWAYS BE MY PRIORITY. 650 00:34:03,267 --> 00:34:06,233 I'M GETTING HEALTHY FOR THEM. 651 00:34:06,233 --> 00:34:10,167 BUT IF I'M NOT THERE FOR THEM, THEN WHAT'S THE POINT? 652 00:34:10,167 --> 00:34:13,800 SO I HAVE TO FIND A WAY TO DO BOTH. 653 00:34:13,800 --> 00:34:15,633 HEY, LANDON! 654 00:34:15,633 --> 00:34:18,667 HI, POOH! HEY! 655 00:34:18,667 --> 00:34:20,700 COME HERE, POOH! 656 00:34:20,700 --> 00:34:22,300 DID YOU DO SO GOOD? 657 00:34:22,300 --> 00:34:24,367 HE DID. HE DID REALLY GOOD TODAY. 658 00:34:24,367 --> 00:34:25,867 Y'ALL HAVE A GREAT AFTERNOON. 659 00:34:25,867 --> 00:34:27,200 -YOU TOO. -THANK YOU. 660 00:34:27,200 --> 00:34:29,267 BYE. 661 00:34:29,267 --> 00:34:31,833 I'M GONNA TRY TO MAKE IT TO SEE DR. NOWZARADAN 662 00:34:31,833 --> 00:34:36,867 NEXT MONTH, BECAUSE I WANT TO DO THIS, 663 00:34:36,867 --> 00:34:40,067 BUT I JUST NEED TO BE THERE FOR LANDON RIGHT NOW. 664 00:34:43,100 --> 00:34:46,133 ** 665 00:34:50,467 --> 00:34:52,067 June: IT'S BEEN ABOUT A MONTH 666 00:34:52,067 --> 00:34:54,167 SINCE MY LAST DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT, 667 00:34:54,167 --> 00:34:57,200 AND I'VE BEEN TRYING TO KEEP UP WITH MY PROGRESS. 668 00:34:57,200 --> 00:35:01,633 BUT I WILL ADMIT, IT'S BEEN GETTING HARDER. 669 00:35:01,633 --> 00:35:03,433 I STARTED INTERVIEWING FOR JOBS 670 00:35:03,433 --> 00:35:05,867 THAT WILL GET ME OUT OF THE HOUSE MORE, 671 00:35:05,867 --> 00:35:08,300 AND A FEW WEEKS AGO, I WAS OFFERED A POSITION 672 00:35:08,300 --> 00:35:11,067 ASSISTING AT A NEARBY LAW FIRM. 673 00:35:11,067 --> 00:35:14,233 I'M HAPPY I'M OUT OF THE HOUSE, AND I'M LOVING MY NEW JOB 674 00:35:14,233 --> 00:35:17,967 BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO BE TRAPPED IN THESE WALLS ANYMORE. 675 00:35:17,967 --> 00:35:20,867 AND WHEN I'M AT HOME ALL DAY, IT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE 676 00:35:20,867 --> 00:35:24,700 I'M STILL LIVING LIKE I WAS WHEN I WAS ALMOST 600 POUNDS 677 00:35:24,700 --> 00:35:27,233 AND TRAPPED IN MY BED OR MY CHAIR ALL DAY LONG. 678 00:35:27,233 --> 00:35:31,300 SO I'M FINDING AS MANY REASONS AS I CAN TO GET OUT, 679 00:35:31,300 --> 00:35:32,867 BECAUSE I NEVER WANT TO LIVE 680 00:35:32,867 --> 00:35:35,767 LIKE I DID OR FALL BACK INTO THAT LIFE. 681 00:35:35,767 --> 00:35:39,200 BUT BEING AT WORK ALL DAY HAS ALSO MADE IT MORE DIFFICULT 682 00:35:39,200 --> 00:35:43,567 TO KEEP UP WITH MY EXERCISE AND TO GET OUT AND WALK. 683 00:35:43,567 --> 00:35:45,733 AND EVEN THOUGH I'M OUT OF THE HOUSE, 684 00:35:45,733 --> 00:35:49,133 THERE'S A LOT OF TIMES I'M JUST SITTING AT WORK. 685 00:35:49,133 --> 00:35:52,400 IT'S JUST AMAZING HOW EASY IT IS TO BE SO BUSY 686 00:35:52,400 --> 00:35:55,733 BUT NOT STAY ACTIVE. 687 00:35:55,733 --> 00:35:58,233 THERE'S A GYM HERE AT MY APARTMENT COMPLEX, 688 00:35:58,233 --> 00:36:01,333 AND I'M THINKING ABOUT CHECKING IT OUT 689 00:36:01,333 --> 00:36:04,800 AND MAYBE GOING TO EXERCISE THERE A COUPLE TIMES A WEEK 690 00:36:04,800 --> 00:36:06,633 TO MAKE UP FOR IT. 691 00:36:06,633 --> 00:36:09,067 HOW I WILL FIND ENOUGH TIME IN A DAY -- 692 00:36:09,067 --> 00:36:11,900 BUT I HAVE TO TRY AT SOMETHING. 693 00:36:11,900 --> 00:36:14,233 THE BIGGEST PROBLEM I STILL HAVE RIGHT NOW, THOUGH, 694 00:36:14,233 --> 00:36:17,567 IS THE EXCESS SKIN ON MY LEGS. 695 00:36:17,567 --> 00:36:20,067 IT'S GETTING TO A POINT WHERE WHEN I GET HOME, 696 00:36:20,067 --> 00:36:23,767 MY LEGS JUST HURT TOO MUCH AND I'M JUST DONE FOR THE DAY, 697 00:36:23,767 --> 00:36:27,600 SO I EAT AND THEN GO TO BED. 698 00:36:27,600 --> 00:36:30,367 I'M CONFIDENT I'M STILL MAKING PROGRESS. 699 00:36:30,367 --> 00:36:33,067 I'M JUST WORRIED IT'S NOT GOING TO BE ENOUGH 700 00:36:33,067 --> 00:36:35,333 WHEN I SEE DR. NOW NEXT. 701 00:36:35,333 --> 00:36:38,667 AND IF I'M STILL NOT ABLE TO GET MY EXCESS-SKIN SURGERY, 702 00:36:38,667 --> 00:36:41,067 I'M JUST NOT SURE WHAT I'M GOING TO DO. 703 00:36:43,467 --> 00:36:46,700 ALL THE WEIGHT IS, LIKE, DROPPING INTO MY INNER THIGHS, 704 00:36:46,700 --> 00:36:51,533 SO IT'S LIKE CARRYING A 10-POUND BABY ON EACH THIGH, 705 00:36:51,533 --> 00:36:53,067 SO I'M PRETTY SURE MY INNER THIGHS 706 00:36:53,067 --> 00:36:55,333 ARE MAYBE 10 POUNDS A PIECE, 707 00:36:55,333 --> 00:36:58,400 GIVE OR TAKE, AND THAT'S DIFFICULT BECAUSE -- 708 00:36:58,400 --> 00:37:01,733 I MEAN, THE SKIN IS COMING BACK AND FORTH ON EACH OTHER, 709 00:37:01,733 --> 00:37:04,533 AND IT'S GETTING SO BAD THAT I'M STARTING 710 00:37:04,533 --> 00:37:07,067 TO NOT WANT TO GET UP AT TIMES. 711 00:37:07,067 --> 00:37:11,067 AND IF MY WEIGHT LOSS IS SLOWING EVEN MORE BECAUSE OF THIS, 712 00:37:11,067 --> 00:37:13,200 I'M SO SCARED I'M NOT GOING TO MAKE IT 713 00:37:13,200 --> 00:37:14,633 AND HIT THAT GOAL. 714 00:37:14,633 --> 00:37:18,300 AND IF THAT HAPPENS, I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO DO. 715 00:37:22,800 --> 00:37:25,833 ** 716 00:37:35,300 --> 00:37:37,600 I'M AT DR. NOWZARADAN'S CLINIC AGAIN, 717 00:37:37,600 --> 00:37:39,300 AND IT'S BEEN ABOUT FIVE MONTHS 718 00:37:39,300 --> 00:37:42,433 SINCE MY LAST APPOINTMENT WITH HIM. 719 00:37:42,433 --> 00:37:45,700 WITH EVERYTHING GOING ON IN MY LIFE, 720 00:37:45,700 --> 00:37:50,067 IT'S BEEN JUST TOO TOUGH TO COME IN. 721 00:37:50,067 --> 00:37:53,333 I TOLD DR. NOW I'VE BEEN DEALING WITH THE DEATH OF MY SON, 722 00:37:53,333 --> 00:37:55,700 AND I'VE JUST BEEN BUSY. 723 00:37:55,700 --> 00:37:59,233 BUT I HAD TO MAKE THE TIME THIS MONTH BECAUSE MY LEG 724 00:37:59,233 --> 00:38:02,967 AND BACK HAVE REALLY STARTED TO HURT. 725 00:38:02,967 --> 00:38:05,733 DOTTIE PERKINS. 726 00:38:05,733 --> 00:38:07,367 Dottie: IT'S GOTTEN SO BAD 727 00:38:07,367 --> 00:38:12,733 THAT I'VE HAD TO START USING MY WALKER AGAIN. 728 00:38:12,733 --> 00:38:15,800 BUT I DON'T WANT TO BE AWAY FROM LANDON FOR TOO LONG, 729 00:38:15,800 --> 00:38:18,700 SO I WANT TO DO THIS QUICKLY. 730 00:38:18,700 --> 00:38:20,633 I JUST NEED TO FIGURE OUT WHAT'S WRONG, 731 00:38:20,633 --> 00:38:26,300 BECAUSE I'M STILL WORKING HARD TO KEEP MY PROMISE TO DANIEL. 732 00:38:26,300 --> 00:38:28,533 I CAN'T FAIL HIM. 733 00:38:28,533 --> 00:38:33,567 LAST TIME I WAS HERE, I WAS AT 520 POUNDS AND DOING WELL, 734 00:38:33,567 --> 00:38:37,800 AND THE DOCTOR WANTED ME TO KEEP LOSING 20 POUNDS A MONTH. 735 00:38:37,800 --> 00:38:40,433 SO IF I STAYED ON TRACK, 736 00:38:40,433 --> 00:38:43,733 THAT WOULD PUT ME DOWN TO 440 POUNDS TODAY. 737 00:38:46,967 --> 00:38:49,500 Nurse: 509. 738 00:38:52,567 --> 00:38:57,600 THAT'S A LOT LESS PROGRESS THAN I WAS HOPING. 739 00:38:57,600 --> 00:39:01,167 I HAVE NO IDEA HOW I LOST SO LITTLE, 740 00:39:01,167 --> 00:39:04,467 BECAUSE I'VE BEEN WORKING TO STICK TO MY DIET, 741 00:39:04,467 --> 00:39:06,700 AND I'M NOT GIVING IN REALLY. 742 00:39:06,700 --> 00:39:11,933 SO I'M HOPING DR. NOWZARADAN ISN'T TOO DISAPPOINTED. 743 00:39:11,933 --> 00:39:13,533 -HELLO. -HEY. 744 00:39:13,533 --> 00:39:16,633 HI, DR. NOW. HOW ARE YOU ALL DOING? 745 00:39:16,633 --> 00:39:17,633 PRETTY GOOD. 746 00:39:17,633 --> 00:39:19,100 YOU DOING ALL RIGHT? 747 00:39:19,100 --> 00:39:21,600 I'M SORRY TO HEAR ABOUT YOUR SON. 748 00:39:21,600 --> 00:39:22,600 THANK YOU. 749 00:39:22,600 --> 00:39:24,767 YOU HOLDING UP OKAY? 750 00:39:24,767 --> 00:39:26,067 I'M OKAY. 751 00:39:26,067 --> 00:39:29,467 HE'S NOT SUFFERING ANYMORE -- NO MORE PAIN. 752 00:39:29,467 --> 00:39:33,567 WHEN HE WENT TO THE HOSPITAL THIS LAST TIME, 753 00:39:33,567 --> 00:39:38,467 HE, UM... HE WASN'T SICK. 754 00:39:38,467 --> 00:39:40,733 HIS LUNGS WERE JUST TIRED. 755 00:39:40,733 --> 00:39:43,500 I AM VERY SORRY. 756 00:39:43,500 --> 00:39:45,467 SO, WHAT IS THE ARMBAND? 757 00:39:45,467 --> 00:39:47,967 IT'S DANIEL'S. I JUST HAVEN'T TOOK IT OFF. 758 00:39:47,967 --> 00:39:48,967 OH. 759 00:39:48,967 --> 00:39:50,567 I FIND IT KIND OF HARD TO TAKE IT -- 760 00:39:50,567 --> 00:39:51,933 DON'T MAKE ME CRY. 761 00:39:51,933 --> 00:39:54,333 I FIND IT KIND OF HARD TO TAKE OFF, 762 00:39:54,333 --> 00:39:56,167 SO I LEFT IT ON. 763 00:39:56,167 --> 00:39:57,167 OKAY. 764 00:39:57,167 --> 00:39:59,567 HOW ARE YOU FEELING OVERALL? 765 00:39:59,567 --> 00:40:03,267 I'M HAVING A LOT OF ISSUES WITH PAIN IN MY LEGS. 766 00:40:03,267 --> 00:40:05,267 LIKE, I'M ON A WALKER. 767 00:40:05,267 --> 00:40:07,833 WHERE IS IT IN PAIN? 768 00:40:07,833 --> 00:40:14,667 IT'S MY BACK -- LIKE, ALL UP UNDERNEATH HERE AND DOWN. 769 00:40:14,667 --> 00:40:17,367 JUST HURTING. IT HURTS. 770 00:40:17,367 --> 00:40:20,133 SO YOUR BODY CONTOUR IS CHANGING, 771 00:40:20,133 --> 00:40:22,767 THIS STRAIN IN YOUR BACK IS CHANGING. 772 00:40:22,767 --> 00:40:25,100 SO THAT'S NORMAL, AND IT WILL PASS 773 00:40:25,100 --> 00:40:28,267 AS YOU LOSE MORE WEIGHT AND YOU ADJUST. 774 00:40:28,267 --> 00:40:32,533 I KNOW I FELT LIKE, YOU KNOW, THE MORE WEIGHT THAT I LOST 775 00:40:32,533 --> 00:40:35,167 I WOULDN'T HURT SO BAD, BUT I DO. 776 00:40:35,167 --> 00:40:38,000 I MEAN, LIKE, I CAN BARELY LIFT MY LEG UP 777 00:40:38,000 --> 00:40:39,467 AND PUT IT IN THE VAN. 778 00:40:39,467 --> 00:40:40,733 I UNDERSTAND. 779 00:40:40,733 --> 00:40:44,800 SOME WATER THERAPY MAY BE GOOD FOR YOU TO DO EVENTUALLY, 780 00:40:44,800 --> 00:40:50,067 BUT RIGHT NOW YOU NEED TO PRIORITIZE PSYCHOTHERAPY. 781 00:40:50,067 --> 00:40:52,867 DOTTIE, OBVIOUSLY, HAD JUST EXPERIENCED 782 00:40:52,867 --> 00:40:55,467 A VERY TRAUMATIC EVENT IN HER LIFE. 783 00:40:55,467 --> 00:40:58,833 BUT SHE SEEMS IN DENIAL ABOUT IT RIGHT NOW. 784 00:40:58,833 --> 00:41:03,567 SHE'S FINDING REASONS AND WAYS WHILE DEALING WITH THE PAIN. 785 00:41:03,567 --> 00:41:05,133 SHE SAYS SHE COULDN'T COME IN 786 00:41:05,133 --> 00:41:08,100 BECAUSE SHE WAS TOO BUSY THESE PAST FEW MONTHS. 787 00:41:08,100 --> 00:41:11,200 BUT THE REALITY IS SHE MADE HERSELF BUSY, 788 00:41:11,200 --> 00:41:13,367 LIKE SHE DID WITH DANIEL. 789 00:41:13,367 --> 00:41:17,100 SHE LET HERSELF BECOME CONSUMED WITH CARING FOR HIM 790 00:41:17,100 --> 00:41:21,167 AND USE IT TO AVOID A LOT OF ISSUES IN HER LIFE. 791 00:41:21,167 --> 00:41:24,900 AND IF SHE SUPPRESSES ALL HER EMOTIONS RIGHT NOW, 792 00:41:24,900 --> 00:41:30,100 THAT'S GOING TO CREATE AN EVEN WORSE SITUATION FOR HER. 793 00:41:30,100 --> 00:41:33,233 YOU JUST EXPERIENCED A TRAUMATIC EVENT, 794 00:41:33,233 --> 00:41:36,200 ONE THAT IS PART OF WHAT HAS BEEN DRIVING YOU 795 00:41:36,200 --> 00:41:37,967 TO EAT ALL THESE YEARS. 796 00:41:37,967 --> 00:41:39,900 WHAT IS IMPORTANT FOR YOUR HEALTH 797 00:41:39,900 --> 00:41:42,667 AND YOUR WEIGHT LOSS IS THAT YOU TAKE A MOMENT 798 00:41:42,667 --> 00:41:45,067 TO DEAL WITH EVERYTHING YOU'RE GOING THROUGH. 799 00:41:45,067 --> 00:41:46,400 OKAY. 800 00:41:46,400 --> 00:41:49,133 SO, I'M NOT GOING TO GIVE YOU A WEIGHT LOSS GOAL RIGHT NOW, 801 00:41:49,133 --> 00:41:53,333 BECAUSE YOUR PRIORITY NEEDS TO BE GOING TO SEE A THERAPIST. 802 00:41:53,333 --> 00:41:54,900 OKAY. 803 00:41:54,900 --> 00:41:57,467 YOU NEED TO FOCUS ON HEALING RIGHT NOW 804 00:41:57,467 --> 00:42:00,933 AND DEALING WITH THE EMOTIONS OF WHAT YOU'VE BEEN THROUGH. 805 00:42:00,933 --> 00:42:04,500 IF YOU JUST PUSH THIS DOWN OR TRY TO IGNORE IT, 806 00:42:04,500 --> 00:42:06,400 THAT EMOTION SUPPRESSION 807 00:42:06,400 --> 00:42:08,267 IS GOING TO START TO LEAD YOU BACK 808 00:42:08,267 --> 00:42:13,633 TO THE SAME EXACT HABITS THAT GOT YOU TO 600 POUNDS. 809 00:42:13,633 --> 00:42:16,600 YOU NEED TO BE HEALTHY EMOTIONALLY 810 00:42:16,600 --> 00:42:19,233 TO BE HEALTHY PHYSICALLY. 811 00:42:19,233 --> 00:42:21,367 SO YOU NEED TO MAKE PSYCHOTHERAPY 812 00:42:21,367 --> 00:42:23,233 A PRIORITY RIGHT NOW. 813 00:42:23,233 --> 00:42:26,967 WE'LL GET BACK TO ALL OF THIS AFTER YOU'VE HAD SOME TIME. 814 00:42:26,967 --> 00:42:27,967 OKAY. 815 00:42:27,967 --> 00:42:30,167 OKAY, I'LL SEE YOU SOON, OKAY? 816 00:42:30,167 --> 00:42:31,700 THANK YOU. OKAY. 817 00:42:32,967 --> 00:42:34,633 Dr. Nowzaradan: AFTER WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY, 818 00:42:34,633 --> 00:42:38,733 DOTTIE HAS TO BE EATING SMALL AMOUNTS ALL DAY LONG 819 00:42:38,733 --> 00:42:42,600 TO SLOW HER WEIGHT LOSS TO THE DEGREE SHE HAS, 820 00:42:42,600 --> 00:42:47,100 AND SHE PROBABLY DOESN'T EVEN REALIZE IT RIGHT NOW. 821 00:42:47,100 --> 00:42:50,067 SHE'S IN DENIAL ABOUT A NUMBER OF THINGS, 822 00:42:50,067 --> 00:42:53,233 AND IF SHE DOESN'T TAKE TIME TO ALLOW HERSELF 823 00:42:53,233 --> 00:42:54,967 TO MOURN OVER THIS LOSS, 824 00:42:54,967 --> 00:42:58,967 SHE'S GOING TO BE CAUSING FAR MORE DAMAGE TO HERSELF 825 00:42:58,967 --> 00:43:01,500 THAN SHE REALIZES. 826 00:43:02,900 --> 00:43:05,733 Dottie: I THINK DR. NOWZARADAN IS RIGHT. 827 00:43:05,733 --> 00:43:08,133 SEEING A THERAPIST WILL BE GOOD. 828 00:43:08,133 --> 00:43:10,933 I WANT TO KEEP MAKING PROGRESS, 829 00:43:10,933 --> 00:43:13,567 AND IF THERAPY CAN PLAY ANY PART OF THAT, 830 00:43:13,567 --> 00:43:16,100 I'M WILLING TO TRY. 831 00:43:26,867 --> 00:43:30,167 TODAY, I'M AT THE THERAPIST THAT DR. NOW WANTS ME TO SEE, 832 00:43:30,167 --> 00:43:32,900 AND I REALLY HOPE SHE'LL BE ABLE TO HELP ME 833 00:43:32,900 --> 00:43:36,667 BECAUSE I'M A LITTLE LOST RIGHT NOW. 834 00:43:36,667 --> 00:43:41,333 SO I WANT TO KNOW WHAT TO DO AND HOW TO FIX THIS FOR DANIEL, 835 00:43:41,333 --> 00:43:44,567 FOR MYSELF, AND FOR MY FAMILY. 836 00:43:45,667 --> 00:43:46,867 -HI, DOTTIE. -HI. 837 00:43:46,867 --> 00:43:48,067 -I'M RACHEL. -I'M DOTTIE. 838 00:43:48,067 --> 00:43:50,633 NICE TO MEET YOU. COME ON BACK. 839 00:43:50,633 --> 00:43:52,767 OKAY. 840 00:43:54,567 --> 00:43:56,633 YEAH, YOU CAN JUST HAVE A SEAT ON THE SOFA THERE. 841 00:43:56,633 --> 00:43:58,233 THANKS FOR COMING IN, DOTTIE. 842 00:43:58,233 --> 00:44:00,800 DO YOU WANT TO GO AHEAD AND START 843 00:44:00,800 --> 00:44:03,867 BY JUST TELLING ME WHERE YOU ARE RIGHT NOW? 844 00:44:03,867 --> 00:44:06,633 I'M STRUGGLING WITH A LOT OF THINGS RIGHT NOW. 845 00:44:06,633 --> 00:44:09,067 I LOST MY OLDEST SON. 846 00:44:09,067 --> 00:44:11,100 -HOW OLD WAS HE? -HE WAS 13. 847 00:44:11,100 --> 00:44:12,633 THAT MUST HAVE BEEN REALLY HARD. 848 00:44:12,633 --> 00:44:13,633 YES. 849 00:44:13,633 --> 00:44:14,767 HIS NAME WAS DANIEL. -MM-HMM. 850 00:44:14,767 --> 00:44:16,467 HE HAD CEREBRAL PALSY. 851 00:44:16,467 --> 00:44:19,467 AND I KNEW WHEN WE WENT TO THE HOSPITAL THAT NIGHT 852 00:44:19,467 --> 00:44:21,633 WE WERE NOT GONNA COME HOME. 853 00:44:21,633 --> 00:44:23,933 YOU HAVE A LOT OF DIFFERENT LAYERS HERE, IT SOUNDS LIKE. 854 00:44:23,933 --> 00:44:25,167 YES. 855 00:44:25,167 --> 00:44:27,133 SO FIRST OF ALL -- I MEAN, YOU HAVE THE TRAUMA 856 00:44:27,133 --> 00:44:28,200 AND THE SHOCK. 857 00:44:28,200 --> 00:44:31,433 YOU ALSO HAD THAT ROUTINE CHANGE, RIGHT? 858 00:44:31,433 --> 00:44:34,267 AFTER 13 YEARS, YOU HAD, "THIS IS MY PURPOSE," 859 00:44:34,267 --> 00:44:36,133 "THIS IS WHAT I DO," AND THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN, 860 00:44:36,133 --> 00:44:37,833 YOUR JOB IS GONE, SO TO SPEAK. 861 00:44:37,833 --> 00:44:40,833 THOUGH IT'S REALLY INTERESTING NOW BECAUSE IN A LOT OF WAYS, 862 00:44:40,833 --> 00:44:42,733 YOU'RE REALLY GOOD AT CARING FOR SOMEONE ELSE, 863 00:44:42,733 --> 00:44:46,600 AND NOW YOU HAVE TO FIGURE OUT "HOW DO I DO THAT FOR MYSELF?" 864 00:44:46,600 --> 00:44:49,500 LATELY -- YOU KNOW, WITHIN THE PAST SIX MONTHS -- 865 00:44:49,500 --> 00:44:52,067 I HAVE NOT LEARNED HOW TO CONTROL MY ANXIETY. 866 00:44:52,067 --> 00:44:54,933 IT'S ALMOST LIKE YOUR BODY'S ALL TIGHT, YOU KNOW, 867 00:44:54,933 --> 00:44:58,067 AND HOLDING ON, AND IT JUST NEEDS TO LET GO. 868 00:44:58,067 --> 00:45:00,200 AND SO THAT'S EMOTIONAL LETTING GO, 869 00:45:00,200 --> 00:45:02,533 AND THAT'S WHAT GRIEVING IS -- GRIEVING IS LETTING GO. 870 00:45:02,533 --> 00:45:05,367 AND SO IT DOESN'T MAKE IT EASY FOR CHANGES TO HAPPEN 871 00:45:05,367 --> 00:45:07,600 LIKE WEIGHT LOSS OR ANY OF THOSE OTHER CHANGES, 872 00:45:07,600 --> 00:45:10,433 AND SO WHAT WE WANT TO HELP YOU DO IS TO LET GO. 873 00:45:10,433 --> 00:45:12,500 SO I'D LIKE FOR YOU, JUST FOR A MOMENT NOW -- 874 00:45:12,500 --> 00:45:14,967 JUST KIND OF IMAGINE THAT DANIEL'S HERE WITH US, 875 00:45:14,967 --> 00:45:18,067 AND I WANT YOU TO TELL HIM WHATEVER IT IS 876 00:45:18,067 --> 00:45:19,800 THAT YOU'D LIKE TO TELL HIM 877 00:45:19,800 --> 00:45:22,500 HAD YOU KNOWN THAT YOU WOULDN'T SEE HIM AGAIN. 878 00:45:23,833 --> 00:45:26,233 [ Crying ] I MISS YOU SO MUCH. 879 00:45:27,867 --> 00:45:30,567 [ SNIFFLES ] I WISH YOU WERE HERE. 880 00:45:31,533 --> 00:45:34,900 I WISH YOU WERE HERE TO SEE ALL -- 881 00:45:34,900 --> 00:45:37,167 ALL THE THINGS, YOU KNOW, 882 00:45:37,167 --> 00:45:38,933 THAT ARE GOING ON WITH ME. 883 00:45:38,933 --> 00:45:39,933 MM-HMM. 884 00:45:39,933 --> 00:45:42,967 I MISS YOU SO MUCH. 885 00:45:42,967 --> 00:45:46,067 WHAT WOULD BE HIS WISH FOR YOU? 886 00:45:46,067 --> 00:45:48,067 HIS WISH FOR ME... 887 00:45:49,600 --> 00:45:55,067 ...WOULD BE PROBABLY NOT TO WORRY ABOUT HIM. 888 00:45:55,067 --> 00:45:57,700 TO LET IT GO, THE WORRY -- 889 00:45:57,700 --> 00:46:00,133 I THINK YOU NEED THAT. 890 00:46:00,133 --> 00:46:01,933 I WOULD RECOMMEND THAT YOU GET A LITTLE JOURNAL 891 00:46:01,933 --> 00:46:03,600 OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT... -MM-HMM. 892 00:46:03,600 --> 00:46:04,767 ...THAT YOU KEEP BY YOUR BED. 893 00:46:04,767 --> 00:46:06,433 WHEN YOU START HAVING A LOT OF THOUGHTS, 894 00:46:06,433 --> 00:46:08,767 THAT MAYBE YOU JUST ARE WRITING THINGS DOWN, 895 00:46:08,767 --> 00:46:10,933 OR YOU HAVE THINGS IN THERE ALREADY WRITTEN DOWN 896 00:46:10,933 --> 00:46:13,567 THAT CAN KIND OF HELP YOU TO REMEMBER, 897 00:46:13,567 --> 00:46:15,967 YOU KNOW, HOW TO LET GO. 898 00:46:15,967 --> 00:46:17,333 THANK YOU SO MUCH. 899 00:46:17,333 --> 00:46:19,333 ALL RIGHT. THANK YOU, DOTTIE. 900 00:46:19,333 --> 00:46:20,333 THANK YOU, THANK YOU. 901 00:46:20,333 --> 00:46:21,567 OKAY. GOOD LUCK WITH EVERYTHING. 902 00:46:21,567 --> 00:46:23,967 OKAY. 903 00:46:27,233 --> 00:46:31,467 Dottie: I'VE HAD SO MUCH FEAR AND GRIEF AND HURT 904 00:46:31,467 --> 00:46:35,800 THAT I JUST HAVEN'T EVER DEALT WITH OR LET GO OF. 905 00:46:35,800 --> 00:46:39,100 I WAS ON SUCH A GOOD TRACK, SO I'M GONNA START 906 00:46:39,100 --> 00:46:42,867 WITH THE JOURNAL IDEA AND SEE HOW I DO WITH THAT. 907 00:46:42,867 --> 00:46:46,100 I SPENT SO MANY YEARS JUST TAKING CARE OF DANIEL, 908 00:46:46,100 --> 00:46:49,067 AND I WOULDN'T CHANGE THAT FOR THE WORLD. 909 00:46:49,067 --> 00:46:53,133 BUT I KNOW I STILL HAVE A LOT OF THINGS I NEED TO DEAL WITH 910 00:46:53,133 --> 00:46:54,700 FROM ALL OF THAT, 911 00:46:54,700 --> 00:46:59,100 AND SO I'M GONNA NEED TO DO THAT NOW IF I WANT TO MOVE FORWARD. 912 00:46:59,100 --> 00:47:02,267 ** 913 00:47:12,767 --> 00:47:15,533 June: I'M BACK AGAIN TO SEE DR. NOWZARADAN, 914 00:47:15,533 --> 00:47:18,067 AND I'M ABOUT TO GET MY WEIGHT CHECKED. 915 00:47:18,067 --> 00:47:21,167 AND I'M MORE NERVOUS THAN I'VE EVER BEEN FOR AN APPOINTMENT 916 00:47:21,167 --> 00:47:23,333 BECAUSE IT'S BEEN SO DIFFICULT 917 00:47:23,333 --> 00:47:26,533 TRYING TO MAKE PROGRESS THESE PAST TWO MONTHS. 918 00:47:26,533 --> 00:47:27,967 JUNE McCAMEY. 919 00:47:27,967 --> 00:47:30,667 SO I DON'T KNOW IF I'M GOING TO BE AT 920 00:47:30,667 --> 00:47:33,667 WHERE I NEED TO BE AT TODAY, AND IF I DON'T GET APPROVED 921 00:47:33,667 --> 00:47:35,700 AND GET THIS EXCESS SKIN OFF OF ME, 922 00:47:35,700 --> 00:47:37,233 I'M REALLY WORRIED ABOUT 923 00:47:37,233 --> 00:47:39,900 WHAT THAT'S GOING TO MEAN FOR MY ACTIVITY. 924 00:47:39,900 --> 00:47:42,533 SO I JUST HOPE I LOST THE 20 POUNDS 925 00:47:42,533 --> 00:47:47,367 I NEED TO HIT THE GOAL TODAY AND FINALLY GET MY SURGERY. 926 00:47:53,633 --> 00:47:57,067 ** 927 00:48:03,933 --> 00:48:06,933 June: I'M ABOUT TO GET MY WEIGHT CHECKED, 928 00:48:06,933 --> 00:48:09,567 AND IF I GET UNDER 300 POUNDS THIS TIME, 929 00:48:09,567 --> 00:48:12,067 I'LL FINALLY QUALIFY FOR MY SKIN REMOVAL. 930 00:48:12,067 --> 00:48:15,067 SO I JUST HOPE I LOST THE 20 POUNDS 931 00:48:15,067 --> 00:48:19,200 I NEED TO HIT THE GOAL TODAY AND FINALLY GET MY SURGERY. 932 00:48:20,233 --> 00:48:22,200 Woman: 306. 933 00:48:27,200 --> 00:48:31,733 MY WEIGHT LOSS HAS SLOWED, BUT I FEEL LIKE I'M IN THE RANGE. 934 00:48:31,733 --> 00:48:35,733 IT'S PROGRESS, AND WHAT IT MEANS TO ME IS I'M WORKING HARD 935 00:48:35,733 --> 00:48:37,200 AND I'M REALLY TRYING. 936 00:48:37,200 --> 00:48:39,700 SO I JUST HOPE DR. NOW SEES THAT. 937 00:48:39,700 --> 00:48:41,067 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 938 00:48:41,067 --> 00:48:42,067 HELLO. 939 00:48:42,067 --> 00:48:43,333 HEY, HOW ARE YOU? 940 00:48:43,333 --> 00:48:44,667 I'M DOING OKAY. 941 00:48:44,667 --> 00:48:46,467 SO, HOW ARE YOU GETTING ALONG? 942 00:48:46,467 --> 00:48:48,433 I'M DOING MUCH BETTER. 943 00:48:48,433 --> 00:48:52,733 WELL, I'M GLAD TO HEAR THAT, AND YOU'RE DOWN TO 306 POUNDS. 944 00:48:52,733 --> 00:48:53,900 YES, SIR. 945 00:48:53,900 --> 00:48:57,367 BUT YOU WERE DOING WELL AND STAYING ON TRACK, 946 00:48:57,367 --> 00:48:59,833 BUT YOUR WEIGHT LOSS IS SLOWING DOWN. 947 00:48:59,833 --> 00:49:04,367 LAST TIME, YOU DROPPED TO LOSING ONLY 16 POUNDS A MONTH, 948 00:49:04,367 --> 00:49:08,267 AND NOW YOU'RE DOWN TO LOSING ONLY 7 POUNDS A MONTH. 949 00:49:08,267 --> 00:49:10,900 SO THIS IS A VERY CONCERNING PATTERN 950 00:49:10,900 --> 00:49:12,733 THAT YOU NEED TO GET A HANDLE ON, 951 00:49:12,733 --> 00:49:15,367 OTHERWISE, THIS IS GOING TO LEAD YOU BACK 952 00:49:15,367 --> 00:49:17,233 TO GAIN EVERYTHING YOU LOST. 953 00:49:17,233 --> 00:49:18,667 I DISAGREE. 954 00:49:18,667 --> 00:49:22,400 I DON'T THINK I'M OVEREATING, BECAUSE I'M STILL LOSING WEIGHT. 955 00:49:22,400 --> 00:49:24,933 JUNE ISN'T UNDERSTANDING HOW SEVERE 956 00:49:24,933 --> 00:49:27,500 THIS DECREASE IN HER WEIGHT LOSS IS. 957 00:49:27,500 --> 00:49:28,867 SO THIS IS AN ISSUE 958 00:49:28,867 --> 00:49:31,667 THAT WE WILL NEED TO KEEP ADDRESSING WITH HER. 959 00:49:31,667 --> 00:49:34,333 BUT REGARDLESS OF HER SLOW WEIGHT LOSS, 960 00:49:34,333 --> 00:49:39,767 SHE HAS LOST ENOUGH TO PERFORM HER EXCESS-SKIN REMOVAL SAFELY. 961 00:49:39,767 --> 00:49:41,667 ALL RIGHT, WE'VE BEEN THROUGH THIS, 962 00:49:41,667 --> 00:49:43,833 AND THIS CONVERSATION IS NOT OVER. 963 00:49:43,833 --> 00:49:47,100 BUT MAYBE IT WILL HELP IF WE GET YOU MORE MOBILE. 964 00:49:47,100 --> 00:49:48,300 YES. 965 00:49:48,300 --> 00:49:51,533 OKAY, AND SO LET'S LOOK AT YOUR THIGH AND SEE. 966 00:49:55,933 --> 00:49:58,833 YOUR LEG IS ACTUALLY LOOKING PRETTY GOOD. 967 00:49:58,833 --> 00:50:00,533 YEAH. 968 00:50:00,533 --> 00:50:04,767 THE FAT IS REDUCED ENOUGH AROUND HER LEG TO SAFELY REMOVE 969 00:50:04,767 --> 00:50:07,633 HER EXCESS SKIN ON HER RIGHT UPPER THIGH, 970 00:50:07,633 --> 00:50:09,467 AND AFTER THE OPERATION, 971 00:50:09,467 --> 00:50:12,533 HOPEFULLY THIS SURGERY WILL HELP MOTIVATE HER 972 00:50:12,533 --> 00:50:16,200 TO MAKE THE PROGRESS SHE NEEDS AND GET BACK ON TRACK. 973 00:50:16,200 --> 00:50:20,500 OKAY, I'M APPROVING YOUR FOR YOUR FIRST SKIN-REMOVAL SURGERY. 974 00:50:20,500 --> 00:50:21,533 PERFECT. 975 00:50:21,533 --> 00:50:23,367 I'M GONNA GO AHEAD AND SCHEDULE YOU 976 00:50:23,367 --> 00:50:25,133 FOR THE OPERATION IN A MONTH. 977 00:50:25,133 --> 00:50:27,667 YOU GONNA DO JUST THE RIGHT THIGH OR BOTH THIGHS? 978 00:50:27,667 --> 00:50:30,400 RIGHT THIGH -- THAT'S GONNA BE TOO MUCH TO DO... 979 00:50:30,400 --> 00:50:32,433 -OKAY. -...ON THE RECOVERY PART. 980 00:50:32,433 --> 00:50:33,933 OKAY, SO THE RIGHT THIGH. 981 00:50:33,933 --> 00:50:37,800 AFTER THIS OPERATION, I WANT YOU TO GET BACK ON TRACK, OKAY? 982 00:50:37,800 --> 00:50:39,433 ALL RIGHT. THANK YOU. 983 00:50:39,433 --> 00:50:41,800 ALL RIGHT, TAKE CARE. 984 00:50:48,233 --> 00:50:50,233 June: I'M REALLY PROUD OF MYSELF RIGHT NOW, 985 00:50:50,233 --> 00:50:51,267 AND I'M SO EXCITED 986 00:50:51,267 --> 00:50:53,733 TO BE GETTING MY SKIN-REMOVAL SURGERY, 987 00:50:53,733 --> 00:50:56,767 DESPITE HOW HARD IT'S BEEN OVER THE LAST COUPLE MONTHS. 988 00:50:56,767 --> 00:50:59,800 I PUSHED MYSELF AND KEPT MOVING AHEAD, 989 00:50:59,800 --> 00:51:02,733 AND I'M SEEING THE RESULT OF THAT PAYOFF NOW. 990 00:51:02,733 --> 00:51:06,333 AND I CAN'T WAIT TO START GETTING AS ACTIVE AS I WAS AGAIN 991 00:51:06,333 --> 00:51:08,867 WITHOUT ALL THE PAIN. 992 00:51:08,867 --> 00:51:10,633 ** 993 00:51:18,700 --> 00:51:19,967 DOROTHY? 994 00:51:19,967 --> 00:51:21,400 -HEY. -HI, I'M GAIL. 995 00:51:21,400 --> 00:51:23,167 I'LL BE WORKING WITH YOU TODAY. -YOU CAN CALL ME "DOTTIE." 996 00:51:23,167 --> 00:51:24,400 THANKS, DOTTIE. COME ON UP. 997 00:51:24,400 --> 00:51:27,233 ARE YOU READY? -YEAH. 998 00:51:27,233 --> 00:51:30,733 Dottie: MY BACK AND LEGS ARE STILL REALLY HURTING, 999 00:51:30,733 --> 00:51:34,533 SO I'M GOING TO BE DOING AQUATIC THERAPY TODAY, 1000 00:51:34,533 --> 00:51:36,400 LIKE DR. NOWZARADAN SAID. 1001 00:51:36,400 --> 00:51:39,900 ** 1002 00:51:39,900 --> 00:51:41,700 GO AROUND THE CORNER, THERE. 1003 00:51:41,700 --> 00:51:44,267 IT'S BEEN YEARS SINCE I'VE BEEN IN A POOL, 1004 00:51:44,267 --> 00:51:45,867 AND I'M REALLY LOOKING FORWARD 1005 00:51:45,867 --> 00:51:49,300 TO THE FEELING OF MY WEIGHT BEING LIFTED OFF ME. 1006 00:51:49,300 --> 00:51:52,967 THAT'S WHAT I'M TRYING TO DO EMOTIONALLY WITH MY JOURNALING, 1007 00:51:52,967 --> 00:51:55,267 AND I WANT THAT FEELING PHYSICALLY, TOO. 1008 00:51:55,267 --> 00:51:57,500 YOU NEED SOME HELP, OR ARE YOU OKAY? 1009 00:51:57,500 --> 00:52:00,933 YOU GOT IT? ALL RIGHT. 1010 00:52:00,933 --> 00:52:03,733 THE MORE I AVOIDED THE EMOTIONAL WEIGHT ON ME, 1011 00:52:03,733 --> 00:52:06,767 THE MORE WEIGHT I PUT ON PHYSICALLY, 1012 00:52:06,767 --> 00:52:11,400 AND I'M HOPING IT WORKS A LITTLE THE OTHER WAY AROUND TODAY, TOO, 1013 00:52:11,400 --> 00:52:14,367 THAT LIFTING ALL THIS WEIGHT OFF ME IN THE WATER 1014 00:52:14,367 --> 00:52:16,567 WILL BE CATHARTIC, IN A WAY. 1015 00:52:18,733 --> 00:52:20,100 WHAT DO YOU THINK? 1016 00:52:20,100 --> 00:52:22,233 FEELS GOOD? -IT FEELS GOOD. 1017 00:52:22,233 --> 00:52:25,600 Dottie: IT'S REALLY PHENOMENAL JUST BEING ABLE TO MOVE AROUND 1018 00:52:25,600 --> 00:52:28,767 AND STRETCH AND MOVE MY BODY IN WAYS 1019 00:52:28,767 --> 00:52:30,667 I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO IN A LONG TIME. 1020 00:52:30,667 --> 00:52:32,867 OKAY, DOTTIE, WE'RE GONNA DO THE BICYCLE NOW. 1021 00:52:32,867 --> 00:52:37,300 SO YOU'RE MOVING YOUR LEGS AS IF YOU'RE RIDING A BIKE. 1022 00:52:37,300 --> 00:52:39,767 IN THE WATER, I'M ABLE TO STRETCH MY LEGS, 1023 00:52:39,767 --> 00:52:41,767 I'M ABLE TO MOVE MY LEGS A LOT MORE, 1024 00:52:41,767 --> 00:52:45,833 WHICH I'M NOT ABLE TO DO OUTSIDE OF THE WATER, 1025 00:52:45,833 --> 00:52:48,533 AND I HOPE DOING THIS EVERY COUPLE OF DAYS HELPS ME 1026 00:52:48,533 --> 00:52:54,800 TO START MAKING PROGRESS AGAIN, BECAUSE I HAVE TWO CHOICES -- 1027 00:52:54,800 --> 00:52:58,467 I CAN LET THE LOSS OF DANIEL BREAK ME 1028 00:52:58,467 --> 00:53:02,333 AND END UP FALLING SHORT OF MY COMMITMENT TO HIM, 1029 00:53:02,333 --> 00:53:03,800 OR I CAN LET MY PROGRESS 1030 00:53:03,800 --> 00:53:08,833 BE SOMETHING THAT HONORS HIM AND HIS MEMORY. 1031 00:53:08,833 --> 00:53:12,400 SO I'M GONNA STAY COMMITTED TO THE PROGRAM 1032 00:53:12,400 --> 00:53:14,400 AND REACH MY FINAL GOAL WEIGHT. 1033 00:53:14,400 --> 00:53:17,533 NO MATTER WHAT, I'M DOING THIS. 1034 00:53:30,467 --> 00:53:33,667 June: TODAY, I'M GETTING MY SKIN-REMOVAL SURGERY. 1035 00:53:33,667 --> 00:53:36,467 I DO WISH I HAD SOME FAMILY WITH ME. 1036 00:53:36,467 --> 00:53:39,933 BUT I KNOW MY SON IS WATCHING OVER ME RIGHT NOW, 1037 00:53:39,933 --> 00:53:42,733 AND THAT BRINGS ME SOME PEACE 1038 00:53:42,733 --> 00:53:45,333 AND THAT THIS IS GOING TO BE THE NEXT BIG STEP. 1039 00:53:45,333 --> 00:53:47,700 SO I KNOW I'M GOING TO BE ALL RIGHT 1040 00:53:47,700 --> 00:53:50,533 AND THAT THIS IS GOING TO BE EXACTLY WHAT I NEED 1041 00:53:50,533 --> 00:53:54,100 AND THE NEXT BIG STEP FOR ME IN MY JOURNEY. 1042 00:53:54,100 --> 00:53:56,567 JUST BIG, DEEP BREATHS. 1043 00:53:56,567 --> 00:53:59,200 Dr. Nowzaradan: TODAY, WE'RE DOING EXCESS-SKIN REMOVAL 1044 00:53:59,200 --> 00:54:02,167 ON JUNE'S UPPER-RIGHT THIGH. 1045 00:54:02,167 --> 00:54:05,400 SHE HAS NOT ONLY DEVELOPED A LOT OF HANGING SKIN THERE, 1046 00:54:05,400 --> 00:54:08,367 BUT SHE HAS A LARGE LYMPHEDEMA MASS. 1047 00:54:08,367 --> 00:54:11,433 SO THIS OPERATION TODAY IS GOING TO BE 1048 00:54:11,433 --> 00:54:14,467 A LITTLE MORE COMPLICATED THAN USUAL. 1049 00:54:14,467 --> 00:54:17,267 OKAY, STARTING THE FIRST INCISION. 1050 00:54:17,267 --> 00:54:21,367 BECAUSE OF ALL THE MASS PULLED DOWN AND THE WEIGHT OF IT, 1051 00:54:21,367 --> 00:54:23,233 IT'S ALL IN HER NERVES 1052 00:54:23,233 --> 00:54:26,133 AND BLOOD VESSELS FROM HER LOWER LEG, 1053 00:54:26,133 --> 00:54:28,467 AND WE HAVE TO SEPARATE THOSE 1054 00:54:28,467 --> 00:54:31,100 AND MAKE SURE THEY DON'T GET CROSSED. 1055 00:54:31,100 --> 00:54:35,100 IF A SINGLE ONE DIES, IT CAN CREATE NEUROLOGICAL PROBLEMS 1056 00:54:35,100 --> 00:54:37,367 OR CIRCULATION PROBLEMS. 1057 00:54:37,367 --> 00:54:39,367 SO WE HAVE TO BE CAREFUL TODAY 1058 00:54:39,367 --> 00:54:41,833 AND MAKE SURE WE HANDLE EACH NERVE 1059 00:54:41,833 --> 00:54:43,967 AND BLOOD VESSEL PROPERLY. 1060 00:54:47,433 --> 00:54:50,100 SO THIS IS GOING TO BE A LONG SURGERY, 1061 00:54:50,100 --> 00:54:53,867 BUT THE RESULT WILL BE SIGNIFICANT FOR JUNE. 1062 00:54:53,867 --> 00:54:57,867 SHE'S GOING TO BE ABLE TO BE MUCH MORE MOBILE ONCE THIS MASS 1063 00:54:57,867 --> 00:54:59,233 IS OFF OF HER. 1064 00:54:59,233 --> 00:55:00,300 ALL RIGHT. 1065 00:55:00,300 --> 00:55:02,300 THIS IS THE SKIN OFF THE RIGHT THIGH. 1066 00:55:02,300 --> 00:55:04,067 CAN YOU PUT THAT BACK ON THAT TABLE? 1067 00:55:04,067 --> 00:55:05,267 OKAY. 1068 00:55:05,267 --> 00:55:08,433 IT HAS DEFINITELY STARTED TO MAKE IT DIFFICULT 1069 00:55:08,433 --> 00:55:11,733 FOR JUNE TO MOVE AROUND AND WALK AS MUCH. 1070 00:55:11,733 --> 00:55:15,533 SO IT IS A GOOD THING THAT WE ARE ABLE TO REMOVE THAT TODAY. 1071 00:55:20,067 --> 00:55:24,300 IT'S GOING TO TAKE HER ABOUT SIX TO EIGHT WEEKS TO FULLY RECOVER. 1072 00:55:24,300 --> 00:55:27,433 BUT EVEN BEFORE THEN, SHE'S GOING TO NOTICE 1073 00:55:27,433 --> 00:55:31,067 A HUGE IMPROVEMENT IN HER ABILITY TO GET AROUND. 1074 00:55:31,067 --> 00:55:34,133 SHE WILL JUST NEED TO GET BACK TO TAKING IT SLOWLY 1075 00:55:34,133 --> 00:55:36,567 UNTIL SHE'S FULLY HEALED. 1076 00:55:40,400 --> 00:55:42,633 AND WE'RE DONE. 1077 00:55:42,633 --> 00:55:45,500 JUNE'S SURGERY WENT VERY WELL TODAY. 1078 00:55:45,500 --> 00:55:48,067 JUNE? WE'RE ALL DONE. 1079 00:55:48,067 --> 00:55:52,400 WE WERE ABLE TO REMOVE THE MASS WITHOUT ANY ISSUES, 1080 00:55:52,400 --> 00:55:56,067 SO SHE SHOULD BE ABLE TO GET UP IN A COUPLE DAYS. 1081 00:55:57,933 --> 00:56:01,133 ONCE JUNE RECOVERS FROM THIS OPERATION, 1082 00:56:01,133 --> 00:56:03,567 SHE WILL NEED THREE MORE SKIN REMOVALS 1083 00:56:03,567 --> 00:56:06,867 FROM HER LEFT LEG AND HER ARMS AND HER BACK. 1084 00:56:06,867 --> 00:56:10,633 BUT BEFORE WE CAN CONSIDER ANY MORE OPERATION, 1085 00:56:10,633 --> 00:56:14,200 JUNE NEEDS TO WORK TO GET HER WEIGHT LOSS BACK ON TRACK 1086 00:56:14,200 --> 00:56:17,067 BECAUSE IF HER WEIGHT LOSS CONTINUES TO SLOW, 1087 00:56:17,067 --> 00:56:20,067 SHE WILL BE GAINING AGAIN IN A MATTER OF MONTHS, 1088 00:56:20,067 --> 00:56:23,133 AND THAT'S GOING TO BE A VERY BAD SITUATION. 1089 00:56:23,133 --> 00:56:27,700 SO I'M HOPING THIS REMOVAL TODAY WILL ENCOURAGE HER TO DO MORE 1090 00:56:27,700 --> 00:56:29,233 AND GET BACK ON TRACK. 1091 00:56:34,067 --> 00:56:36,967 ** 1092 00:56:41,900 --> 00:56:45,467 Dottie: I'M HERE TO SEE THE DOCTOR AGAIN AND FIND OUT HOW I'M DOING. 1093 00:56:45,467 --> 00:56:47,233 ** 1094 00:56:47,233 --> 00:56:49,167 I FEEL LIKE I'VE BEEN DOING BETTER, 1095 00:56:49,167 --> 00:56:52,767 AND I'M HOPING I LOST A GOOD AMOUNT OF WEIGHT, 1096 00:56:52,767 --> 00:56:54,800 EVEN THOUGH DR. NOWZARADAN 1097 00:56:54,800 --> 00:56:57,600 REALLY DIDN'T GIVE ME A GOAL THIS TIME. 1098 00:56:57,600 --> 00:57:00,167 DOROTHY PERKINS. 1099 00:57:00,167 --> 00:57:04,700 I KNOW I'M SUPPOSED TO BE LOSING AT LEAST 20 POUNDS EACH MONTH, 1100 00:57:04,700 --> 00:57:07,067 AND I WAS AT 509 POUNDS, 1101 00:57:07,067 --> 00:57:13,067 SO THAT MEANS I SHOULD BE AT 470 POUNDS TODAY. 1102 00:57:13,067 --> 00:57:16,600 AND I'M HOPING I'M AT LEAST CLOSE TO GETTING BACK ON TRACK. 1103 00:57:23,600 --> 00:57:25,533 I DIDN'T LOSE ANYTHING. 1104 00:57:28,533 --> 00:57:32,567 I THOUGHT I WAS DOING A LOT BETTER NOW, 1105 00:57:32,567 --> 00:57:35,500 BUT I DON'T KNOW HOW THIS IS POSSIBLE 1106 00:57:35,500 --> 00:57:39,467 BECAUSE I'M DEALING WITH THINGS AND I'M GETTING EXERCISE. 1107 00:57:39,467 --> 00:57:42,767 I GUESS THE ONLY REASON IS THAT I'M STILL OVEREATING 1108 00:57:42,767 --> 00:57:44,467 AND I DON'T REALIZE IT. 1109 00:57:44,467 --> 00:57:50,067 SO I DON'T THINK DR. NOW'S GONNA BE HAPPY WITH ME. 1110 00:57:50,067 --> 00:57:51,600 [ COUGHING ] 1111 00:57:51,600 --> 00:57:53,600 YOU OKAY? 1112 00:57:53,600 --> 00:57:56,067 [ LAUGHTER ] 1113 00:57:56,067 --> 00:57:57,367 HOW YOU ALL DOING? 1114 00:57:57,367 --> 00:57:58,800 I'M FINE. HOW ARE YOU? 1115 00:57:58,800 --> 00:58:00,633 DOING ALL RIGHT? 1116 00:58:00,633 --> 00:58:02,300 I'M DOING OKAY. 1117 00:58:02,300 --> 00:58:07,267 SO, WHAT DOES THAT MEAN MORE SPECIFICALLY? 1118 00:58:07,267 --> 00:58:09,300 I'M IN A BETTER PLACE THAN I WAS, 1119 00:58:09,300 --> 00:58:10,800 AND I'M SEEING A THERAPIST 1120 00:58:10,800 --> 00:58:13,700 AND STICKING TO MY EXERCISES AND DIET. 1121 00:58:13,700 --> 00:58:15,400 OKAY, IF THAT WAS TRUE, 1122 00:58:15,400 --> 00:58:18,700 YOU WOULDN'T HAVE LOST ONLY FIVE POUNDS IN TWO MONTHS. 1123 00:58:18,700 --> 00:58:21,333 TO MAINTAIN YOUR WEIGHT, YOU HAVE TO TAKE IN 1124 00:58:21,333 --> 00:58:23,700 AT LEAST 4,000 TO 5,000 CALORIES A DAY. 1125 00:58:23,700 --> 00:58:24,933 YEAH. 1126 00:58:24,933 --> 00:58:29,067 SO YOU ARE STILL USING FOOD TO COPE RIGHT NOW. 1127 00:58:29,067 --> 00:58:32,267 YOU AREN'T DEALING WITH YOUR EMOTIONS, 1128 00:58:32,267 --> 00:58:35,100 AND THAT'S DRIVING YOU TO EAT. 1129 00:58:35,100 --> 00:58:38,200 Dr. Nowzaradan: THE FACT THAT DOTTIE IS NOT LOSING WEIGHT 1130 00:58:38,200 --> 00:58:40,433 MEANS THAT SHE'S STILL TRYING TO AVOID 1131 00:58:40,433 --> 00:58:42,967 DEALING WITH WHAT HAPPENED TO HER RECENTLY. 1132 00:58:42,967 --> 00:58:46,067 SO HER PRIORITY RIGHT NOW IS TO MAKE SURE 1133 00:58:46,067 --> 00:58:48,633 SHE KEEPS GOING TO THE PSYCHOTHERAPY. 1134 00:58:48,633 --> 00:58:52,267 IF SHE DOESN'T, THEN NOTHING WE DO WILL MATTER BECAUSE 1135 00:58:52,267 --> 00:58:56,567 SHE'S NOT ADDRESSING THE CORE ISSUES BEHIND THIS RIGHT NOW. 1136 00:58:56,567 --> 00:58:59,267 BUT SHE CAN'T GO TOO MUCH LONGER LIKE THIS 1137 00:58:59,267 --> 00:59:02,767 BEFORE SHE STARTS TO GAIN AGAIN. 1138 00:59:02,767 --> 00:59:06,300 SO, I'M STILL NOT GIVING YOU ANY WEIGHT-LOSS GOAL RIGHT NOW 1139 00:59:06,300 --> 00:59:09,167 BECAUSE YOU STILL NEED TO DEAL WITH THINGS, 1140 00:59:09,167 --> 00:59:11,767 AND I WANT YOU TO DO TWO THINGS RIGHT NOW. 1141 00:59:11,767 --> 00:59:15,333 FIRST, JUST GO BACK TO THE BASIC WITH YOUR FOOD, 1142 00:59:15,333 --> 00:59:17,633 BECAUSE YOU'RE CLOSE TO GAINING AGAIN 1143 00:59:17,633 --> 00:59:21,167 AND WE HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING WE CAN TO PREVENT THAT. 1144 00:59:21,167 --> 00:59:25,633 HERE'S A LIST OF FOOD THAT YOU NEED TO AVOID. 1145 00:59:25,633 --> 00:59:28,800 SO JUST FOLLOW THIS FOR WHAT TO EAT AGAIN. 1146 00:59:28,800 --> 00:59:31,633 AND THE SECOND THING IS THAT YOU NEED TO MAKE SURE 1147 00:59:31,633 --> 00:59:35,833 YOU KEEP GOING TO A THERAPIST TO WORK ON THIS ISSUE. 1148 00:59:35,833 --> 00:59:38,700 THAT'S YOUR PRIORITY RIGHT NOW. 1149 00:59:38,700 --> 00:59:41,633 DON'T TRY TO AVOID AND SUPPRESS 1150 00:59:41,633 --> 00:59:44,233 WHAT YOU'RE GOING THROUGH, DOTTIE. 1151 00:59:44,233 --> 00:59:47,300 SO LET ME KNOW IF YOU NEED ANYTHING. 1152 00:59:47,300 --> 00:59:48,567 OKAY. 1153 00:59:48,567 --> 00:59:52,167 I'LL SEE YOU LATER. I'LL SEE YOU LATER. 1154 00:59:54,433 --> 00:59:56,533 -COME ON. -LET'S GO. 1155 00:59:56,533 --> 00:59:59,800 LET'S GO. 1156 00:59:59,800 --> 01:00:01,800 Dottie: I'M SCARED RIGHT NOW 1157 01:00:01,800 --> 01:00:06,500 BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE I'M NOT EVEN IN CONTROL. 1158 01:00:06,500 --> 01:00:11,733 SO I'M JUST GONNA TRY AND DO WHAT DR. NOWZARADAN SAYS 1159 01:00:11,733 --> 01:00:17,433 AND START OVER WITH MY DIET AND GO BACK TO THE BASICS AGAIN. 1160 01:00:17,433 --> 01:00:19,100 I MADE DANIEL A PROMISE, 1161 01:00:19,100 --> 01:00:21,833 AND I PROMISED HIM I WAS GONNA BE OKAY. 1162 01:00:21,833 --> 01:00:25,033 AND I AM GONNA BE OKAY. 1163 01:00:25,033 --> 01:00:29,967 MY MINDSET GOING FORWARD IS TO READ OVER THE THINGS 1164 01:00:29,967 --> 01:00:35,300 THAT DR. NOW HAS GIVEN ME AND TO GET BACK ON TRACK. 1165 01:00:35,300 --> 01:00:39,667 I CAN'T MESS THIS UP, SO I'LL HAVE TO FIGURE THIS OUT. 1166 01:00:39,667 --> 01:00:41,833 ** 1167 01:00:48,667 --> 01:00:52,867 June: I'VE BEEN HOME FROM SURGERY FOR ABOUT A MONTH NOW, 1168 01:00:52,867 --> 01:00:57,433 AND I'M SLOWLY RECOVERING AND FEELING BETTER EVERYDAY. 1169 01:00:57,433 --> 01:01:00,067 MY BROTHER HAD TO COME OVER FOR A FEW DAYS 1170 01:01:00,067 --> 01:01:03,267 JUST TO HELP ME GET AROUND. 1171 01:01:03,267 --> 01:01:06,967 BUT I'M DOING A LOT BETTER NOW. 1172 01:01:06,967 --> 01:01:09,233 EVEN THOUGH I'M STILL HEALING, 1173 01:01:09,233 --> 01:01:12,933 I CAN ALREADY GET AROUND AND MOVE SO MUCH EASIER. 1174 01:01:12,933 --> 01:01:16,600 THE MASS IS NOT THERE -- IT'S NOT RUBBING, 1175 01:01:16,600 --> 01:01:21,933 SO IT MAKES IT A WHOLE LOT EASIER. 1176 01:01:21,933 --> 01:01:25,067 I CAN'T BE TOO ACTIVE JUST YET, BUT I'M GETTING UP 1177 01:01:25,067 --> 01:01:27,700 AND MOVING AROUND AS MUCH AS I CAN CONSTANTLY 1178 01:01:27,700 --> 01:01:30,533 BECAUSE NOW THAT 1179 01:01:30,533 --> 01:01:33,433 I'M ALMOST RECOVERED FROM MY FIRST SKIN SURGERY, 1180 01:01:33,433 --> 01:01:35,700 I WANT TO LOSE THE WEIGHT TO GET APPROVED 1181 01:01:35,700 --> 01:01:37,933 FOR MY SECOND ONE AS SOON AS POSSIBLE. 1182 01:01:37,933 --> 01:01:39,867 SO I'M EATING RIGHT, 1183 01:01:39,867 --> 01:01:42,933 AND I'M MAKING SURE MY SUTURES STAY CLEAN. 1184 01:01:42,933 --> 01:01:46,800 MY ONLY ISSUE IS THE DRAIN TUBES. 1185 01:01:46,800 --> 01:01:49,200 IT'S JUST A LITTLE ANNOYING. 1186 01:01:49,200 --> 01:01:52,800 I HAVE TO TAKE THE DRAINS TO THE TOILET AND EMPTY THEM OUT. 1187 01:01:55,767 --> 01:01:59,167 BUT NOW MY FOCUS IS ON MY OTHER SKIN-REMOVAL SURGERY 1188 01:01:59,167 --> 01:02:03,200 AND THEN GETTING TO MY TARGET WEIGHT. 1189 01:02:03,200 --> 01:02:05,767 DR. NOW WANTS ME DOWN TO 200, 1190 01:02:05,767 --> 01:02:08,800 BUT I DON'T KNOW IF I WANT TO GET THAT LOW. 1191 01:02:08,800 --> 01:02:13,100 I LIKE BEING THICK, SO I DON'T KNOW IF I WANT TO BE BELOW 200, 1192 01:02:13,100 --> 01:02:14,467 TO BE HONEST. 1193 01:02:14,467 --> 01:02:17,100 BUT THAT'S GONNA BE A HASH TAG 1194 01:02:17,100 --> 01:02:20,067 ME AND DR. NOWZARADAN ARE GONNA HAVE TO WORK OUT. 1195 01:02:20,067 --> 01:02:21,367 [ CHUCKLES ] 1196 01:02:21,367 --> 01:02:24,167 WHATEVER IT IS, I WANTED TO GET TO MY TARGET WEIGHT 1197 01:02:24,167 --> 01:02:26,267 AND HAVE ALL MY SURGERIES THIS YEAR, 1198 01:02:26,267 --> 01:02:28,600 AND IT'S TOOK ME A LOT LONGER THAN I THOUGHT 1199 01:02:28,600 --> 01:02:31,133 TO GET APPROVED FOR MY FIRST SKIN REMOVAL. 1200 01:02:31,133 --> 01:02:32,933 AND I DON'T WANT TO END UP 1201 01:02:32,933 --> 01:02:34,700 IN THE SAME SITUATION I WAS LAST TIME. 1202 01:02:34,700 --> 01:02:39,633 WITH IT TAKING SO LONG, THE SKIN STARTED TO GET UNBEARABLE, 1203 01:02:39,633 --> 01:02:42,833 SO I'M NOT SLOWING DOWN AT ALL. 1204 01:02:42,833 --> 01:02:47,267 I'M GOING TO WORK HARD TO SHOW DR. NOW I'M READY, 1205 01:02:47,267 --> 01:02:49,400 AND HE'S GONNA HAVE NO REASON TO TURN ME DOWN. 1206 01:02:54,400 --> 01:02:58,567 ** 1207 01:03:05,067 --> 01:03:07,267 Dottie: SINCE MY LAST DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT, 1208 01:03:07,267 --> 01:03:09,100 I'VE STILL BEEN MEETING WITH A THERAPIST 1209 01:03:09,100 --> 01:03:11,200 LIKE I'M SUPPOSED TO. 1210 01:03:11,200 --> 01:03:13,600 AND AT MY LAST APPOINTMENT, SHE SUGGESTED 1211 01:03:13,600 --> 01:03:16,133 I FIND AN ACTIVITY TO DO WITH MY FAMILY 1212 01:03:16,133 --> 01:03:19,400 WHERE WE ALL JUST HAVE FUN. 1213 01:03:19,400 --> 01:03:22,367 SHE SAYS I'VE LOST A LOT OF MY IDENTITY 1214 01:03:22,367 --> 01:03:25,567 BY MAKING MY FAMILY MY JOB 1215 01:03:25,567 --> 01:03:28,300 AND THAT EVEN THOUGH I TAKE CARE OF THEM WELL, 1216 01:03:28,300 --> 01:03:29,933 SHE THINKS IT WOULD BE GOOD FOR ME 1217 01:03:29,933 --> 01:03:32,600 AND US AS A FAMILY TO WORK ON A NEW DYNAMIC 1218 01:03:32,600 --> 01:03:34,567 WHERE I DON'T TURN THEM INTO A JOB 1219 01:03:34,567 --> 01:03:38,300 TO AVOID A LOT OF ISSUES. 1220 01:03:38,300 --> 01:03:42,200 I DID THAT WITH DANIEL FOR YEARS BECAUSE HE NEEDED ME, 1221 01:03:42,200 --> 01:03:44,300 AND NOW I'M REALLY FOCUSED ON LANDON 1222 01:03:44,300 --> 01:03:46,067 BECAUSE HE HASN'T BEEN TALKING. 1223 01:03:46,067 --> 01:03:47,267 CHRIS! -WHAT? 1224 01:03:47,267 --> 01:03:49,100 PUT HIM UP ON THAT BIG SLIDE. 1225 01:03:49,100 --> 01:03:51,600 COME ON. COME ON! 1226 01:03:51,600 --> 01:03:53,500 [ CHUCKLES ] HE WON'T DO IT. 1227 01:03:53,500 --> 01:03:56,167 SHE ALSO THINKS THIS WILL BE GOOD FOR HIM 1228 01:03:56,167 --> 01:03:59,167 AND MAY EVEN HELP BRING HIM OUT OF HIS SHELL A LITTLE BIT. 1229 01:03:59,167 --> 01:04:00,233 ALL RIGHT. COME ON, BUDDY. 1230 01:04:00,233 --> 01:04:02,167 -[ LAUGHS ] -YOU READY? 1231 01:04:02,167 --> 01:04:03,333 OH! 1232 01:04:03,333 --> 01:04:05,400 [ LANDON SQUEALS ] 1233 01:04:05,400 --> 01:04:06,967 [ LAUGHTER ] 1234 01:04:12,533 --> 01:04:15,067 WHAT'D YOU THINK ABOUT THAT? [ LAUGHS ] 1235 01:04:15,067 --> 01:04:16,667 COME ON, LET'S GO. 1236 01:04:16,667 --> 01:04:18,167 COME ON. 1237 01:04:18,167 --> 01:04:20,667 I FEEL THIS BURDEN TO BE THERE FOR MY FAMILY 1238 01:04:20,667 --> 01:04:21,767 BECAUSE I LOVE THEM. 1239 01:04:21,767 --> 01:04:23,233 HERE -- COME HERE. 1240 01:04:23,233 --> 01:04:25,400 SO A LOT OF TIMES, THAT MEANS I DON'T REALLY HAVE THE TIME 1241 01:04:25,400 --> 01:04:26,533 TO SLOW DOWN 1242 01:04:26,533 --> 01:04:29,233 AND DEAL WITH EVERYTHING GOING ON IN MY LIFE. 1243 01:04:29,233 --> 01:04:30,433 HOLD ON. WEE! 1244 01:04:30,433 --> 01:04:33,167 AT LEAST EVERYONE IS TELLING ME I'M AVOIDING 1245 01:04:33,167 --> 01:04:36,633 DEALING WITH MY EMOTIONS AND THAT I'M OVEREATING. 1246 01:04:36,633 --> 01:04:39,500 SO I'VE GONE BACK TO THE BASIC DIET PLAN 1247 01:04:39,500 --> 01:04:43,900 THAT THE DOCTOR GAVE ME AGAIN, AND I'M TRYING TO FOLLOW THAT 1248 01:04:43,900 --> 01:04:48,133 AND KEEP MY PORTIONS AROUND 1,200 CALORIES A DAY. 1249 01:04:48,133 --> 01:04:51,267 BUT IF I'M STILL NOT MAKING ANY PROGRESS, 1250 01:04:51,267 --> 01:04:53,800 I REALLY DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA DO, 1251 01:04:53,800 --> 01:04:57,167 BECAUSE I'M LISTENING TO THE THERAPIST. 1252 01:04:57,167 --> 01:05:00,167 I DON'T WANT TO START GAINING AGAIN. 1253 01:05:00,167 --> 01:05:01,433 NO MATTER WHAT, 1254 01:05:01,433 --> 01:05:04,233 I HAVE TO TURN MYSELF AROUND BEFORE THAT HAPPENS. 1255 01:05:07,133 --> 01:05:10,767 ** 1256 01:05:14,067 --> 01:05:17,167 I'M HOPING TO IMPRESS THE DOCTOR WITH MY WEIGHT LOSS TODAY... 1257 01:05:17,167 --> 01:05:18,233 JUNE McCAMEY? 1258 01:05:18,233 --> 01:05:20,567 ...SO HE HAS NO REASON 1259 01:05:20,567 --> 01:05:23,433 NOT TO APPROVE ME FOR MY NEXT SURGERY. 1260 01:05:23,433 --> 01:05:27,100 I WAS DOWN TO 295 WHEN I LEFT THE HOSPITAL, 1261 01:05:27,100 --> 01:05:30,700 SO IF I STAYED ON TRACK, I SHOULD BE DOWN TO 255 TODAY. 1262 01:05:32,300 --> 01:05:35,267 OKAY. 1263 01:05:35,267 --> 01:05:37,633 IT IS WHAT IT IS. 1264 01:05:37,633 --> 01:05:40,833 IT'S NOT AS MUCH OF A LOSS AS I WAS HOPING, 1265 01:05:40,833 --> 01:05:44,233 BUT I FEEL MY PROGRESS IS GOOD. 1266 01:05:44,233 --> 01:05:46,900 I MEAN, HIS NUMBERS FOR HIM IS HIS NUMBERS, 1267 01:05:46,900 --> 01:05:48,767 BUT MY NUMBERS FOR ME -- 1268 01:05:48,767 --> 01:05:51,733 I FEEL LIKE I'M DOING PRETTY DOGGONE GOOD. 1269 01:05:51,733 --> 01:05:54,567 SO HOPEFULLY, DR. NOW SEES MY PROGRESS 1270 01:05:54,567 --> 01:05:56,800 AND THINKS I'M READY FOR MY NEXT STEP. 1271 01:05:56,800 --> 01:05:57,833 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 1272 01:05:57,833 --> 01:05:59,567 -HELLO. -HEY. 1273 01:05:59,567 --> 01:06:00,967 HOW ARE YOU TODAY? 1274 01:06:00,967 --> 01:06:03,133 I'M DOING, I'M DOING. 1275 01:06:03,133 --> 01:06:04,467 HOW IS YOUR SUTURES DOING? 1276 01:06:04,467 --> 01:06:05,767 ANY ISSUES? 1277 01:06:05,767 --> 01:06:09,167 UM... IT'S SWOLLEN, BUT NO. 1278 01:06:09,167 --> 01:06:11,300 OKAY, THEN YOU'RE STILL RECOVERING 1279 01:06:11,300 --> 01:06:12,400 FROM YOUR SURGERY WELL. 1280 01:06:12,400 --> 01:06:14,833 BUT WHAT'S GOING ON WITH YOUR WEIGHT? 1281 01:06:14,833 --> 01:06:18,167 WHEN YOU LEFT THE HOSPITAL, YOU WERE 295. 1282 01:06:18,167 --> 01:06:20,133 NOW YOU'RE 292, 1283 01:06:20,133 --> 01:06:22,667 SO YOU AREN'T LOSING WEIGHT ANYMORE. 1284 01:06:22,667 --> 01:06:25,167 I JUST MADE SOME POOR CHOICES, TO BE HONEST. 1285 01:06:25,167 --> 01:06:27,300 WELL, THIS HAS BEEN A CHRONIC PROBLEM. 1286 01:06:27,300 --> 01:06:30,633 YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN, RIGHT NOW, UNDER 200 POUNDS, 1287 01:06:30,633 --> 01:06:32,967 AND YOU ARE AROUND 300 POUNDS. 1288 01:06:32,967 --> 01:06:36,933 THIS IS NOT A SINGLE INCIDENCE OF POOR CHOICES, 1289 01:06:36,933 --> 01:06:40,467 AND THE SAME THING THAT DRIVE YOU TO EAT BEFORE 1290 01:06:40,467 --> 01:06:43,800 IS STILL PLAYING A ROLE IN YOUR LIFE. 1291 01:06:43,800 --> 01:06:45,500 AND YOU HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE 1292 01:06:45,500 --> 01:06:47,833 TO GET A HANDLE ON THAT SITUATION. 1293 01:06:47,833 --> 01:06:51,133 I FEEL I'VE GOT A HANDLE ON IT, BUT THEN I HAVE MOMENTS. 1294 01:06:51,133 --> 01:06:53,767 I'M NOT GONNA LIE AND SAY THAT I DON'T. 1295 01:06:53,767 --> 01:06:56,633 Dr. Nowzaradan: JUNE IS NOT UNDERSTANDING THE ISSUE. 1296 01:06:56,633 --> 01:07:00,700 SHE THINKS THAT HER WEIGHT LOSS SLOWING IS NOT A BIG DEAL 1297 01:07:00,700 --> 01:07:03,867 BECAUSE SHE'S FAILING TO SEE THE WARNING SIGNS. 1298 01:07:03,867 --> 01:07:06,167 AND IF SHE DOESN'T WAKE UP NOW, 1299 01:07:06,167 --> 01:07:09,400 SHE'S GOING TO START GAINING BEFORE HER NEXT APPOINTMENT. 1300 01:07:09,400 --> 01:07:13,400 SO LOSING 285 POUNDS IN A YEAR AND A HALF 1301 01:07:13,400 --> 01:07:14,567 IS NOT GOOD ENOUGH FOR YOU. 1302 01:07:14,567 --> 01:07:15,700 IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE SAYING? 1303 01:07:15,700 --> 01:07:17,567 YOU'RE NOT UNDERSTANDING ME -- 1304 01:07:17,567 --> 01:07:19,500 IT'S NOT ABOUT HOW MUCH YOU LOST, 1305 01:07:19,500 --> 01:07:21,367 IT'S ABOUT WHERE YOU'RE AT NOW 1306 01:07:21,367 --> 01:07:23,400 AND THE CHOICES YOU'RE MAKING. 1307 01:07:23,400 --> 01:07:26,267 YOU ARE NOT AT YOUR GOAL WEIGHT OF 200 POUNDS. 1308 01:07:26,267 --> 01:07:27,667 THAT'S YOUR THEORY. 1309 01:07:27,667 --> 01:07:30,533 I MEAN, YOUR THEORY IS YOU WANT EVERYBODY AT 200 POUNDS, 1310 01:07:30,533 --> 01:07:32,167 BUT I DON'T WANT TO BE UNDER 200. 1311 01:07:32,167 --> 01:07:33,867 YOU DON'T WANT TO BE UNDER 200 POUNDS? 1312 01:07:33,867 --> 01:07:35,067 -NO. -THAT'S FINE. 1313 01:07:35,067 --> 01:07:36,867 IT'S NOT ABOUT BEING AT A NUMBER. 1314 01:07:36,867 --> 01:07:39,700 IT IS ABOUT UNDERSTANDING YOUR EATING DISORDER 1315 01:07:39,700 --> 01:07:41,067 AND CORRECTING IT. 1316 01:07:41,067 --> 01:07:42,267 YOU'RE JUSTIFYING 1317 01:07:42,267 --> 01:07:45,500 LETTING YOUR EATING DISORDER BACK IN RIGHT NOW, 1318 01:07:45,500 --> 01:07:47,767 BUT YOU DON'T GET THAT ADDICTION 1319 01:07:47,767 --> 01:07:50,400 IS LIKE A SMALL PET YOU FEED. 1320 01:07:50,400 --> 01:07:53,500 YOU THINK YOU CAN CONTROL IT BECAUSE IT'S SMALL, 1321 01:07:53,500 --> 01:07:58,067 BUT YOU DON'T REALIZE THAT IT GROWS AND YOU LOSE CONTROL. 1322 01:07:58,067 --> 01:08:00,367 AND YOU'RE ALREADY LOSING CONTROL. 1323 01:08:00,367 --> 01:08:04,433 THIS IS A VERY IMPORTANT MOMENT FOR JUNE. 1324 01:08:04,433 --> 01:08:07,300 SHE HAS TO DECIDE WHAT SHE'S GOING TO DO -- 1325 01:08:07,300 --> 01:08:10,467 IF SHE'S GOING TO TAKE CONTROL OF HER SITUATION AGAIN 1326 01:08:10,467 --> 01:08:13,467 OR IF SHE'S GOING TO CONTINUE MAKING COMPROMISES 1327 01:08:13,467 --> 01:08:15,367 AND JUSTIFY IT. 1328 01:08:15,367 --> 01:08:19,233 BUT JUNE SEEMS TO BE MOTIVATED FOR A SKIN-REMOVAL SURGERY, 1329 01:08:19,233 --> 01:08:23,100 SO MAYBE THAT'LL BE WHAT IT TAKES TO GET HER TO REALIZE 1330 01:08:23,100 --> 01:08:25,367 WHAT SHE NEEDS TO DO. 1331 01:08:25,367 --> 01:08:27,133 I'LL MAKE IT SIMPLE FOR YOU. 1332 01:08:27,133 --> 01:08:30,067 IF YOU WANT SKIN-REMOVAL, THINK ABOUT FIGURING OUT 1333 01:08:30,067 --> 01:08:31,967 HOW TO GET BACK ON TRACK. 1334 01:08:31,967 --> 01:08:35,700 GET CONTROL OF YOUR EATING DISORDER AND HIT THAT GOAL. 1335 01:08:35,700 --> 01:08:38,067 IF NOT, THEN DO IT YOUR WAY. 1336 01:08:38,067 --> 01:08:41,533 SO, LET ME ASK YOU THIS -- IF I GET DOWN TO MAYBE 250, 1337 01:08:41,533 --> 01:08:42,933 WILL YOU DO THIS ONE? 1338 01:08:42,933 --> 01:08:45,433 IF YOU GET DOWN UNDER 250, YES. 1339 01:08:45,433 --> 01:08:46,733 OKAY. THAT'S FAIR. 1340 01:08:46,733 --> 01:08:48,167 THAT'S FAIR. 1341 01:08:48,167 --> 01:08:49,933 BUT IT'S NOT GONNA BE PRODUCTIVE 1342 01:08:49,933 --> 01:08:51,667 IF YOU CONTINUE GAINING WEIGHT. 1343 01:08:51,667 --> 01:08:52,667 RIGHT. 1344 01:08:52,667 --> 01:08:54,100 -OKAY? -OKAY. 1345 01:08:54,100 --> 01:08:56,333 ALL RIGHT, I'LL SEE YOU THEN. 1346 01:08:56,333 --> 01:08:57,367 ** 1347 01:08:58,400 --> 01:09:01,400 [ DOOR CLOSES ] 1348 01:09:01,400 --> 01:09:04,467 June: TODAY DIDN'T GO EXACTLY AS I HOPED. 1349 01:09:04,467 --> 01:09:06,167 I DON'T AGREE WITH DR. NOW 1350 01:09:06,167 --> 01:09:08,633 THAT I'M NOT MAKING THE PROGRESS THAT I NEED. 1351 01:09:08,633 --> 01:09:11,333 BUT IF DR. NOW WANTS ME TO RISE TO THE CHALLENGE, 1352 01:09:11,333 --> 01:09:14,600 THEN I CAN HANDLE THAT, ESPECIALLY IF THAT MEANS 1353 01:09:14,600 --> 01:09:16,867 I GET APPROVED FOR MY NEXT SKIN REMOVAL. 1354 01:09:16,867 --> 01:09:20,367 SO I'M GOING TO RISE TO THE OCCASION 1355 01:09:20,367 --> 01:09:20,867 AND SHOW HIM WHAT I CAN DO. 1356 01:09:27,833 --> 01:09:30,533 ** 1357 01:09:39,967 --> 01:09:42,567 Dottie: I'M BACK TO SEE DR. NOWZARADAN 1358 01:09:42,567 --> 01:09:45,633 AND SEEING IF I STARTED MAKING PROGRESS AGAIN. 1359 01:09:45,633 --> 01:09:49,067 I THINK I'M DOING BETTER, BUT I THOUGHT THAT OTHER TIMES. 1360 01:09:49,067 --> 01:09:53,767 MY BIGGEST FEAR RIGHT NOW IS I MAY HAVE EVEN GAINED. 1361 01:09:53,767 --> 01:09:56,767 DOTTIE PERKINS. 1362 01:09:56,767 --> 01:10:00,500 SO I'M JUST HOPING AND PRAYING IT'S A GOOD NUMBER TODAY, 1363 01:10:00,500 --> 01:10:02,933 AND IF I'M BACK ON TRACK MAKING THE PROGRESS 1364 01:10:02,933 --> 01:10:08,833 I'M SUPPOSED TO MAKE, THAT I'LL BE AT 464 POUNDS TODAY. 1365 01:10:08,833 --> 01:10:12,467 BUT I'M JUST HOPING I'M LOSING ANYTHING AGAIN. 1366 01:10:18,467 --> 01:10:21,900 AT LEAST IT'S NOT A GAIN, BUT I DON'T UNDERSTAND 1367 01:10:21,900 --> 01:10:25,233 HOW I'M STILL NOT LOSING ANY WEIGHT. 1368 01:10:25,233 --> 01:10:29,067 AND I'M SURE DR. NOWZARADAN IS GONNA BE REALLY CONCERNED, 1369 01:10:29,067 --> 01:10:32,600 AND I'M STARTING TO FEEL LIKE I'M NEVER GONNA FIGURE THIS OUT. 1370 01:10:36,200 --> 01:10:37,333 -HELLO. -HEY. 1371 01:10:37,333 --> 01:10:39,433 -HI. -HOW ARE YOU ALL DOING? 1372 01:10:39,433 --> 01:10:42,267 WE'RE OKAY. HOW ARE YOU? 1373 01:10:42,267 --> 01:10:43,900 ALL RIGHT. 1374 01:10:43,900 --> 01:10:46,633 SO, YOU HAVEN'T LOST ANY WEIGHT, HUH? 1375 01:10:46,633 --> 01:10:48,100 NO. 1376 01:10:48,100 --> 01:10:51,867 THE REALITY IS THAT YOU'RE STILL NOT DEALING WITH THE ISSUES. 1377 01:10:51,867 --> 01:10:53,967 YOUR WEIGHT LOSS HAS SLOWED, 1378 01:10:53,967 --> 01:10:56,900 AND NOW IT HAS COMPLETELY STOPPED. 1379 01:10:56,900 --> 01:11:00,200 NOW YOU'RE A COUPLE MONTHS FROM GAINING AGAIN, 1380 01:11:00,200 --> 01:11:02,067 SO WHAT WE NEED TO DO 1381 01:11:02,067 --> 01:11:04,667 IS TO GIVE YOU THE BYPASS REVISION 1382 01:11:04,667 --> 01:11:09,500 AND CONVERT YOUR GASTRIC SLEEVE TO A FULL BYPASS. 1383 01:11:09,500 --> 01:11:11,400 -OKAY. -OKAY. 1384 01:11:11,400 --> 01:11:15,167 DOTTIE IS STILL IN DENIAL ABOUT HER SITUATION. 1385 01:11:15,167 --> 01:11:18,667 SHE KEEPS THINKING THAT SHE'S MAKING PROGRESS, 1386 01:11:18,667 --> 01:11:22,400 BUT THE FACT THAT SHE'S NO LONGER LOSING ANY WEIGHT 1387 01:11:22,400 --> 01:11:25,500 MEANS THAT SHE'S EATING EVEN MORE NOW. 1388 01:11:25,500 --> 01:11:27,867 AND SHE'S ABOUT TO LOSE CONTROL. 1389 01:11:27,867 --> 01:11:30,667 SO WE NEED TO INTERVENE AND DO REVISION 1390 01:11:30,667 --> 01:11:33,900 ON HER WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY TO MAKE IT MORE AGGRESSIVE 1391 01:11:33,900 --> 01:11:36,967 AND REDUCE HER ABILITY TO EAT. 1392 01:11:36,967 --> 01:11:40,167 DOTTIE, YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND THIS OPERATION 1393 01:11:40,167 --> 01:11:42,500 IS NOT GOING TO SOLVE YOU PROBLEM. 1394 01:11:42,500 --> 01:11:45,967 IT'S GOING TO PREVENT YOU FROM GAINING WEIGHT RIGHT NOW 1395 01:11:45,967 --> 01:11:49,500 AND BUY YOU SOME MORE TIME TO DEAL WITH YOUR ISSUES. 1396 01:11:49,500 --> 01:11:51,400 BUT EVEN WITH A FULL BYPASS, 1397 01:11:51,400 --> 01:11:53,367 I THINK YOU'RE GONNA FAIL THE OPERATION 1398 01:11:53,367 --> 01:11:58,400 BECAUSE WHAT IS EMOTIONALLY DRIVING TO FOOD 1399 01:11:58,400 --> 01:12:00,967 IS NOT BEING ADDRESSED IN YOUR SITUATION. 1400 01:12:00,967 --> 01:12:03,200 BUT THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE. 1401 01:12:03,200 --> 01:12:05,267 YOU UNDERSTAND? -OKAY. 1402 01:12:05,267 --> 01:12:06,867 -ALL RIGHT. -THANK YOU. 1403 01:12:06,867 --> 01:12:08,200 I'LL SEE YOU. 1404 01:12:08,200 --> 01:12:10,367 ** 1405 01:12:10,367 --> 01:12:13,800 Dr. Nowzaradan: DOTTIE USES FOOD AS A CRUTCH, 1406 01:12:13,800 --> 01:12:17,267 AND THIS REVISION WILL TAKE THAT AWAY FOR NOW. 1407 01:12:17,267 --> 01:12:20,933 AND WITH HER ABILITY TO COPE WITH FOOD REMOVED, 1408 01:12:20,933 --> 01:12:23,100 SHE'S GOING TO HAVE NO OTHER CHOICE 1409 01:12:23,100 --> 01:12:25,067 BUT FACE HER EMOTIONS. 1410 01:12:25,067 --> 01:12:28,567 SO THIS IS GOING TO BE A HARD PROCESS FOR HER. 1411 01:12:28,567 --> 01:12:31,600 ** 1412 01:12:31,600 --> 01:12:34,900 Dottie: I THINK THIS OPERATION IS SOMETHING I NEED, 1413 01:12:34,900 --> 01:12:37,467 AND I'M WILLING TO TRY ANYTHING AT THIS POINT 1414 01:12:37,467 --> 01:12:43,067 BECAUSE I DESPERATELY DON'T WANT TO START GAINING AGAIN. 1415 01:12:43,067 --> 01:12:45,667 ** 1416 01:12:52,467 --> 01:12:55,400 June: SINCE MY LAST DOCTOR'S VISIT, 1417 01:12:55,400 --> 01:12:58,600 I KNOW I'VE BEEN CRUSHING IT. 1418 01:12:58,600 --> 01:13:02,433 I AM NOT MAKING ANY COMPROMISES WITH MY DIET, 1419 01:13:02,433 --> 01:13:04,333 AND I'M STAYING ACTIVE. 1420 01:13:06,633 --> 01:13:09,667 I'VE BEEN WORKING OUT THREE DAYS A WEEK 1421 01:13:09,667 --> 01:13:12,933 HERE AT THE GYM AT MY APARTMENT. 1422 01:13:12,933 --> 01:13:16,467 AND I'M ALSO BACK TO TAKING MY WALKS TWICE A DAY. 1423 01:13:16,467 --> 01:13:18,100 [ TREADMILL BEEPS ] 1424 01:13:18,100 --> 01:13:21,700 I PLAN TO GO BACK TO DR. NOW'S OFFICE NEXT MONTH 1425 01:13:21,700 --> 01:13:24,667 AND SHOW HIM I ROSE TO HIS CHALLENGE. 1426 01:13:28,133 --> 01:13:32,233 I HAVE THREE MORE SKIN SURGERIES TO GO, 1427 01:13:32,233 --> 01:13:36,067 AND I'M GOING TO MAKE SURE I GET MY SECOND ONE SOON. 1428 01:13:36,067 --> 01:13:38,333 AND THEN I'M GOING TO KEEP WORKING HARD 1429 01:13:38,333 --> 01:13:41,100 UNTIL I GET ALL OF THEM 1430 01:13:41,100 --> 01:13:43,300 SO THAT I CAN BE COMPLETELY FINISHED 1431 01:13:43,300 --> 01:13:46,433 AND HAVE MY WEIGHT-LOSS JOURNEY BEHIND ME. 1432 01:13:46,433 --> 01:13:49,200 I'M DETERMINED TO DO THIS. 1433 01:13:49,200 --> 01:13:52,167 AND I'M WALKING INTO HIS CLINIC NEXT MONTH, 1434 01:13:52,167 --> 01:13:55,133 AND I'M GOING TO WOW HIM WITH MY WEIGHT LOSS. 1435 01:13:55,133 --> 01:13:57,267 ** 1436 01:14:08,533 --> 01:14:11,867 Dr. Nowzaradan: TODAY, WE'RE DOING A GASTRIC BYPASS REVISION 1437 01:14:11,867 --> 01:14:14,700 TO DOTTIE'S SLEEVE SURGERY. 1438 01:14:14,700 --> 01:14:17,867 A GASTRIC SLEEVE IS A WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY 1439 01:14:17,867 --> 01:14:21,133 THAT REDUCES THE SIZE OF PERSON'S STOMACH 1440 01:14:21,133 --> 01:14:25,300 AND PREVENT THEM FROM EATING TOO MUCH IN ONE SETTING. 1441 01:14:25,300 --> 01:14:28,700 OKAY, STARTING THE FIRST INCISION. 1442 01:14:28,700 --> 01:14:34,067 BUT TODAY, WE'RE REDUCING THE SIZE OF HER STOMACH EVEN MORE. 1443 01:14:34,067 --> 01:14:37,333 TURN THE ROOM LIGHT OFF. 1444 01:14:37,333 --> 01:14:41,367 THE BYPASS REVISION WILL ALSO CONNECT THE LOWER PORTION 1445 01:14:41,367 --> 01:14:46,533 OF INTESTINE TO HER STOMACH SO THAT SHE HAS REDUCED ABILITY 1446 01:14:46,533 --> 01:14:49,500 TO ABSORB CALORIES AND GAIN WEIGHT. 1447 01:14:49,500 --> 01:14:52,100 AND IT ALSO WILL CHANGE HER METABOLISM 1448 01:14:52,100 --> 01:14:55,300 AND ALTER HER PHYSICAL DRIVE TO EAT RIGHT NOW. 1449 01:14:55,300 --> 01:14:58,433 DON'T GO TOO LATERAL. 1450 01:14:58,433 --> 01:15:01,500 FOR ME, IT'S VERY DIFFICULT TO JUST SIT HERE. 1451 01:15:01,500 --> 01:15:03,433 I DON'T KNOW IF SHE'S HAVING PROBLEMS, 1452 01:15:03,433 --> 01:15:05,133 OR THEY JUST TAKE THAT LONG. 1453 01:15:05,133 --> 01:15:07,633 BUT DOTTIE MEANS THE WORLD TO ME, 1454 01:15:07,633 --> 01:15:10,533 AND I CAN'T IMAGINE MY LIFE WITHOUT HER. 1455 01:15:11,733 --> 01:15:14,967 Dr. Nowzaradan: THIS PROCEDURE IS GOING TO HELP PREVENT DOTTIE 1456 01:15:14,967 --> 01:15:18,833 FROM GAINING RIGHT NOW AND GIVE HER A LITTLE MORE TIME 1457 01:15:18,833 --> 01:15:21,667 TO START DEALING WITH HER ISSUES. 1458 01:15:21,667 --> 01:15:24,833 IF SHE DOESN'T DO THAT, THEN WITHIN SIX MONTHS, 1459 01:15:24,833 --> 01:15:29,467 THIS SURGERY WILL FAIL, TOO, AND SHE'LL START TO GAIN AGAIN. 1460 01:15:29,467 --> 01:15:31,933 BUT IMMEDIATELY AFTER THIS PROCEDURE 1461 01:15:31,933 --> 01:15:34,067 IS GOING TO BE A PIVOTAL MOMENT, 1462 01:15:34,067 --> 01:15:37,233 BECAUSE WHEN SHE WAKES UP FROM SURGERY, 1463 01:15:37,233 --> 01:15:38,967 SHE'S GOING TO DISCOVER 1464 01:15:38,967 --> 01:15:42,467 SHE HAS LITTLE PHYSICAL DRIVE TO FOOD. 1465 01:15:42,467 --> 01:15:44,767 SHE WON'T BE ABLE TO EAT ANYTHING 1466 01:15:44,767 --> 01:15:47,133 THAT SHE HAS BEEN USING TO COPE, 1467 01:15:47,133 --> 01:15:49,900 AND WITH THAT COPING MECHANISM GONE, 1468 01:15:49,900 --> 01:15:54,100 SHE'S GOING TO BE FORCED TO DEAL WITH HER EMOTIONS RIGHT NOW. 1469 01:15:54,100 --> 01:15:56,333 SHE'S GOING TO HIT ROCK BOTTOM 1470 01:15:56,333 --> 01:15:59,733 AND HAVE TO FACE EVERYTHING SHE HAS BEEN AVOIDING. 1471 01:15:59,733 --> 01:16:02,267 ROOM LIGHT ON. 1472 01:16:02,267 --> 01:16:04,700 OKAY. LET'S CLOSE HER UP. 1473 01:16:04,700 --> 01:16:06,333 SO, FOR THE NEXT WEEK, 1474 01:16:06,333 --> 01:16:09,667 WE ARE GOING TO NEED TO KEEP HER HERE TO WATCH HER 1475 01:16:09,667 --> 01:16:12,800 AND MAKE SURE THAT WE HELP HER THROUGH THIS TIME 1476 01:16:12,800 --> 01:16:17,200 BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T REALIZE HOW HARD THIS IS GOING TO BE 1477 01:16:17,200 --> 01:16:20,433 AND HOW MUCH PAIN SHE'S BEEN RUNNING FROM. 1478 01:16:20,433 --> 01:16:22,700 ALL RIGHT, ALL FINISHED. 1479 01:16:22,700 --> 01:16:25,833 OKAY. DOTTIE'S SURGERY WENT VERY WELL. 1480 01:16:25,833 --> 01:16:29,067 SO, THE NEXT WEEK MAY BE 1481 01:16:29,067 --> 01:16:32,767 ONE OF THE MOST DIFFICULT TIMES OF HER LIFE 1482 01:16:32,767 --> 01:16:36,233 BECAUSE SHE HAS SOME HARD DAYS IN FRONT OF HER. 1483 01:16:36,233 --> 01:16:38,400 BUT SHE WILL GET THROUGH IT 1484 01:16:38,400 --> 01:16:42,367 AND HOPEFULLY GET BACK ON TRACK WITH ALL OF THIS. 1485 01:16:42,367 --> 01:16:44,733 AND WE'LL BE THERE TO HELP HER THROUGH IT. 1486 01:16:50,467 --> 01:16:53,067 ** 1487 01:17:03,767 --> 01:17:06,167 June: DR. NOW GAVE ME A CHALLENGE 1488 01:17:06,167 --> 01:17:09,367 AND WANTED ME TO LOSE 40 POUNDS BY THIS VISIT... 1489 01:17:09,367 --> 01:17:10,800 JUNE McCAMEY. 1490 01:17:10,800 --> 01:17:16,067 ...SO I NEED TO BE DOWN TO 250 POUNDS. 1491 01:17:16,067 --> 01:17:19,067 AND I'M HERE TODAY TO SHOW HIM NO MATTER WHAT, 1492 01:17:19,067 --> 01:17:20,833 I'LL RISE TO THE CHALLENGE. 1493 01:17:20,833 --> 01:17:23,067 JUST BECAUSE I HAVE MY OWN PACE 1494 01:17:23,067 --> 01:17:28,067 DOESN'T MEAN I CAN'T DO IT AT HIS. 1495 01:17:28,067 --> 01:17:29,700 OH, HE GONNA BE HAPPY ON THIS ONE. 1496 01:17:29,700 --> 01:17:32,067 LET'S SEE HOW HE GONNA REACT TO THIS ONE. 1497 01:17:32,067 --> 01:17:33,967 I GOT IT. OKAY. 1498 01:17:33,967 --> 01:17:36,600 I DID EXACTLY LIKE I SAID. 1499 01:17:36,600 --> 01:17:41,400 I'M BACK ON TRACK, AND I KNOW HE'S GONNA BE HAPPY ABOUT THAT. 1500 01:17:41,400 --> 01:17:46,333 I'M CURRENTLY 242, AND I FEEL DAMN GOOD ABOUT IT. 1501 01:17:46,333 --> 01:17:47,900 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 1502 01:17:47,900 --> 01:17:49,567 -HELLO. -HEY. 1503 01:17:49,567 --> 01:17:51,533 -HOW ARE YOU? -I'M GOOD. 1504 01:17:51,533 --> 01:17:54,667 SO, YOU'RE DOWN TO 242 POUNDS. 1505 01:17:54,667 --> 01:17:57,967 AND THAT MEANS YOU LOST AROUND 350 POUNDS. 1506 01:17:57,967 --> 01:18:00,300 -YES, SIR. -THAT IS GREAT. 1507 01:18:00,300 --> 01:18:02,633 SO, YOU'RE BACK IN CONTROL RIGHT NOW 1508 01:18:02,633 --> 01:18:04,833 AND YOU HIT THE GOAL WE AGREED ON, 1509 01:18:04,833 --> 01:18:06,300 SO I'M APPROVING YOU 1510 01:18:06,300 --> 01:18:08,333 FOR YOUR SECOND EXCESS-SKIN REMOVAL. 1511 01:18:08,333 --> 01:18:09,633 PERFECT. 1512 01:18:09,633 --> 01:18:12,867 Dr. Nowzaradan: I'M HAPPY WITH JUNE'S PROGRESS THIS MONTH. 1513 01:18:12,867 --> 01:18:14,667 THE MOST IMPORTANT THING 1514 01:18:14,667 --> 01:18:18,200 WAS TO BREAK THE CYCLE THAT SHE WAS FALLING INTO 1515 01:18:18,200 --> 01:18:21,300 SO THAT SHE DIDN'T START TO GAIN AGAIN, 1516 01:18:21,300 --> 01:18:23,100 AND THE CHALLENGE TO HIT HER GOAL 1517 01:18:23,100 --> 01:18:26,867 FOR HER SKIN-REMOVAL SEEMS TO HAVE MOTIVATED HER 1518 01:18:26,867 --> 01:18:29,833 TO GET BACK CONTROL OF HER EATING HABIT. 1519 01:18:29,833 --> 01:18:31,267 YOU'RE DOING GREAT. YOU'RE DOING GREAT. 1520 01:18:31,267 --> 01:18:32,467 YES. 1521 01:18:32,467 --> 01:18:33,567 I'M PROUD OF YOU -- STICK WITH THE PROGRAM. 1522 01:18:33,567 --> 01:18:36,400 I'LL SET YOU UP FOR THAT SURGERY IN ONE MONTH. 1523 01:18:36,400 --> 01:18:39,700 I DO APPRECIATE YOU. THANK YOU SO MUCH. 1524 01:18:39,700 --> 01:18:41,333 ALL RIGHT, JUNE. SEE YOU LATER. 1525 01:18:41,333 --> 01:18:44,167 BYE-BYE. 1526 01:18:44,167 --> 01:18:46,767 ** 1527 01:18:46,767 --> 01:18:49,067 June: I'M VERY PROUD OF MYSELF RIGHT NOW. 1528 01:18:49,067 --> 01:18:51,733 I SET MY MIND TO IT, AND I HIT MY GOAL 1529 01:18:51,733 --> 01:18:53,600 AND I GOT WHAT I WANT. 1530 01:18:53,600 --> 01:18:56,267 TO GO FROM YOUR HEALTH BEING HORRIBLE, 1531 01:18:56,267 --> 01:18:59,767 WHERE IT'S A POSSIBILITY YOU MAY NOT WAKE UP 1532 01:18:59,767 --> 01:19:01,967 BECAUSE YOU CAN'T BREATHE, 1533 01:19:01,967 --> 01:19:05,600 TO BEING EXTREMELY BLESSED -- IT FEELS GOOD. 1534 01:19:05,600 --> 01:19:06,833 IT'S BEEN A JOURNEY. 1535 01:19:06,833 --> 01:19:10,467 IT'S BEEN HARD, BUT I WOULDN'T CHANGE IT. 1536 01:19:10,467 --> 01:19:13,433 ** 1537 01:19:18,100 --> 01:19:20,733 Dottie: I'M HERE TO VISIT DANIEL'S GRAVE. 1538 01:19:20,733 --> 01:19:22,133 ** 1539 01:19:22,133 --> 01:19:26,167 AND IT'S COMING UP ON A YEAR OF HIM BEING GONE, 1540 01:19:26,167 --> 01:19:29,767 AND EMOTIONS ARE REALLY HIGH. 1541 01:19:29,767 --> 01:19:33,533 I STILL MISS HIM SO, SO MUCH. 1542 01:19:34,567 --> 01:19:37,567 HE WAS SUCH A BIG PART OF ME, 1543 01:19:37,567 --> 01:19:43,733 AND LOSING HIM WAS ALMOST LIKE COMPLETELY LOSING MYSELF. 1544 01:19:43,733 --> 01:19:47,133 BUT AFTER THE GASTRIC BYPASS REVISION, 1545 01:19:47,133 --> 01:19:50,300 I COULD HARDLY EAT ANYTHING. 1546 01:19:50,300 --> 01:19:53,233 I WAS ON LIQUIDS FOR A FEW WEEKS, 1547 01:19:53,233 --> 01:19:57,367 AND NOW I CAN STILL ONLY EAT A SMALL PORTION. 1548 01:19:57,367 --> 01:20:02,900 AND IT WAS A HUGE SHIFT FOR ME THAT I WASN'T EVEN READY FOR 1549 01:20:02,900 --> 01:20:04,100 BECAUSE I HAD NO IDEA 1550 01:20:04,100 --> 01:20:07,033 HOW MUCH I WAS ACTUALLY STILL EATING. 1551 01:20:07,033 --> 01:20:09,000 AND WHEN THAT WAS TAKEN AWAY FROM ME, 1552 01:20:09,000 --> 01:20:10,800 I HAD NOTHING TO FALL BACK ON, 1553 01:20:10,800 --> 01:20:14,067 AND I CRASHED HARD IN THE HOSPITAL. 1554 01:20:14,067 --> 01:20:18,667 THERE WERE A COUPLE OF DAYS I WAS EVEN SUICIDAL. 1555 01:20:18,667 --> 01:20:22,300 I JUST DIDN'T REALIZE ALL THAT WAS BOTTLING UP INSIDE ME, 1556 01:20:22,300 --> 01:20:26,200 AND FOOD IS WHAT MADE ME NUMB TO IT ALL. 1557 01:20:26,200 --> 01:20:27,900 I'M DOING A LITTLE BETTER NOW, 1558 01:20:27,900 --> 01:20:30,967 BUT I'M FAR FROM BEING PAST THIS. 1559 01:20:30,967 --> 01:20:33,000 AND IF I DON'T WORK THROUGH IT SOON, 1560 01:20:33,000 --> 01:20:36,167 DR. NOWZARADAN SAID THAT EFFECTS OF THE BYPASS 1561 01:20:36,167 --> 01:20:37,667 WILL START TO LESSEN 1562 01:20:37,667 --> 01:20:40,733 AND I WILL START TO BE ABLE TO OVEREAT AGAIN. 1563 01:20:40,733 --> 01:20:44,333 SO I NEED TO DEAL WITH MY EMOTIONS. 1564 01:20:44,333 --> 01:20:47,133 BUT FOR NOW, I STARTED LOSING AGAIN, 1565 01:20:47,133 --> 01:20:51,733 AND I'VE LOST 37 POUNDS TO GET DOWN TO 465 POUNDS. 1566 01:20:51,733 --> 01:20:54,733 ** 1567 01:20:54,733 --> 01:20:57,167 BUT I KNOW I HAVE A LOT TO DEAL WITH STILL 1568 01:20:57,167 --> 01:20:59,733 IF I WANT TO KEEP THAT GOING. 1569 01:20:59,733 --> 01:21:01,833 SO I'M GONNA KEEP GOING TO THERAPY 1570 01:21:01,833 --> 01:21:05,567 AND TRY TO WORK ON MY EMOTIONS AND PAIN. 1571 01:21:05,567 --> 01:21:08,900 I DON'T THINK I'LL EVER FULLY GET PAST IT, 1572 01:21:08,900 --> 01:21:11,433 BUT IT'S NOT REALLY ABOUT THAT. 1573 01:21:11,433 --> 01:21:13,400 IT'S MORE ABOUT LEARNING HOW TO COPE 1574 01:21:13,400 --> 01:21:17,933 AND DEAL WITH IT IN A WAY THAT'S NOT SELF-DESTRUCTIVE. 1575 01:21:17,933 --> 01:21:21,600 THIS HAS BEEN SUCH A HARD YEAR. 1576 01:21:21,600 --> 01:21:23,400 BUT WHAT I'VE LEARNED 1577 01:21:23,400 --> 01:21:26,067 IS I HAVE TO START TO DEAL WITH THINGS... 1578 01:21:26,067 --> 01:21:28,167 ** 1579 01:21:28,167 --> 01:21:30,633 ...NO MATTER HOW AFRAID I AM. 1580 01:21:30,633 --> 01:21:35,200 ** 1581 01:21:35,200 --> 01:21:38,233 I'M WORKING ON NOT MAKING MY FAMILY A COMMITMENT 1582 01:21:38,233 --> 01:21:42,300 OVER AN ENJOYMENT AND JUST BEING WITH THEM. 1583 01:21:42,300 --> 01:21:46,233 I CAN TAKE CARE OF THEM AND STILL NOT LOSE MYSELF. 1584 01:21:46,233 --> 01:21:49,500 SO CHRIS AND I ARE MAKING IT A PRIORITY 1585 01:21:49,500 --> 01:21:51,667 TO ALLOW LANDON TIME TO BE A KID... 1586 01:21:51,667 --> 01:21:53,733 OH, HE'S AT THE THING! 1587 01:21:53,733 --> 01:21:57,967 ...AND TAKE HIM OUT AND HAVE FUN LIKE HE SHOULD. 1588 01:21:57,967 --> 01:22:01,067 AND I'M ALREADY SEEING SUCH A CHANGE IN HIM 1589 01:22:01,067 --> 01:22:04,233 FROM JUST THE FEW TIMES WE'VE DONE IT. 1590 01:22:04,233 --> 01:22:08,967 HE'S NOT TALKING MUCH MORE YET, BUT HE'S ENGAGING A LOT MORE, 1591 01:22:08,967 --> 01:22:12,733 WHICH IS A BIG STEP I'M HAPPY ABOUT. 1592 01:22:12,733 --> 01:22:16,067 AND I KNOW I STILL HAVE A LONG ROAD AHEAD OF ME. 1593 01:22:16,067 --> 01:22:18,667 BUT GOOD OR BAD, I CAN FACE IT, 1594 01:22:18,667 --> 01:22:21,733 AND I CAN START TO LEARN HOW TO DEAL WITH THINGS 1595 01:22:21,733 --> 01:22:25,533 IN A WAY THAT'S HEALTHIER THAN I HAVE IN MY WHOLE LIFE. 1596 01:22:25,533 --> 01:22:28,300 SO AS HARD AS THE DAYS AHEAD MAY BE, 1597 01:22:28,300 --> 01:22:30,267 I KNOW THAT I CAN HANDLE IT. 1598 01:22:32,067 --> 01:22:37,500 ** 1599 01:22:37,500 --> 01:22:40,100 I AM GOING SHOPPING THIS MORNING 1600 01:22:40,100 --> 01:22:43,800 FOR SOME NEW CLOTHES FOR THIS NEW BODY. 1601 01:22:43,800 --> 01:22:49,067 I'M LOOKING FOR A FORM-FITTING, LIKE, EVENING DRESS 1602 01:22:49,067 --> 01:22:52,900 TO BASICALLY GET BACK OUT THERE ON THE DATING SCENE. 1603 01:22:52,900 --> 01:22:55,767 I'VE LOST OVER 300-AND-SOME POUNDS, 1604 01:22:55,767 --> 01:23:01,067 SO I'M LIKE DOWN FROM A 6X TO 14, 16. 1605 01:23:01,067 --> 01:23:06,833 IT FEELS GOOD TO FINALLY GET BACK TO A SMALLER SIZE -- 1606 01:23:06,833 --> 01:23:10,600 NOT WHERE I HAVE TO SHOP ONLINE. 1607 01:23:10,600 --> 01:23:12,867 TO BE ABLE TO PULL SOMETHING OFF THE RACK 1608 01:23:12,867 --> 01:23:16,467 AND THEN SEE HOW IT LOOKS ON ME FEELS AMAZING, 1609 01:23:16,467 --> 01:23:18,933 AND I'M LOVING HOW I LOOK. 1610 01:23:18,933 --> 01:23:20,967 SO NOW I CAN GO GET US IN TROUBLE. 1611 01:23:20,967 --> 01:23:24,800 I FEEL LIKE EVERYTHING ABOUT ME FEELS SO MUCH BETTER NOW. 1612 01:23:24,800 --> 01:23:27,500 I LOOK A LOT BETTER, I FEEL A LOT BETTER, 1613 01:23:27,500 --> 01:23:30,900 AND I HAVE SO MUCH MORE CONFIDENCE NOW. 1614 01:23:30,900 --> 01:23:34,100 ** 1615 01:23:34,100 --> 01:23:37,867 THIS TIME TWO YEARS AGO, I HAD LET THE PAIN 1616 01:23:37,867 --> 01:23:39,733 FROM THE DEATH OF MY SON 1617 01:23:39,733 --> 01:23:42,700 DRIVE ME TO SUCH A DESTRUCTIVE PLACE, 1618 01:23:42,700 --> 01:23:46,533 AND WHEN I STARTED TO LET THAT PAIN GO A YEAR AGO, 1619 01:23:46,533 --> 01:23:49,233 I STARTED TO BREAK FREE. 1620 01:23:49,233 --> 01:23:53,367 AND I'M WORKING ON LETTING GO OF MORE AND MORE EVERY DAY, 1621 01:23:53,367 --> 01:23:55,233 WHETHER IT'S BY FINDING WAYS 1622 01:23:55,233 --> 01:23:57,933 TO REMEMBER HIM OR CELEBRATE HIM. 1623 01:23:57,933 --> 01:24:01,100 AND JUST ABOUT EVERY YEAR AROUND HIS HEAVEN DAY, 1624 01:24:01,100 --> 01:24:02,700 THE DAY HE WENT TO HEAVEN, 1625 01:24:02,700 --> 01:24:05,600 I THINK ABOUT ADDING SOMETHING TO THE TATTOO 1626 01:24:05,600 --> 01:24:07,667 I HAVE OF MY SON ON MY BACK. 1627 01:24:07,667 --> 01:24:09,567 MY SON IS ON MY BACK... 1628 01:24:09,567 --> 01:24:10,633 UH-HUH. 1629 01:24:10,633 --> 01:24:12,433 ...TODAY'S ACTUALLY HIS HEAVEN DAY, 1630 01:24:12,433 --> 01:24:14,433 AND I NEED -- -A TOUCH-UP? 1631 01:24:14,433 --> 01:24:19,267 YEAH, A TOUCH-UP, AND THEN HIS HEAVEN AND HIS BIRTHDAY. 1632 01:24:19,267 --> 01:24:21,333 YEAH, WE CAN DEFINITELY DO THAT. 1633 01:24:21,333 --> 01:24:25,233 AFTER I LOST MACK, I WENT DOWN THIS REAL DEEP RABBIT HOLE. 1634 01:24:25,233 --> 01:24:28,567 NO ONE KNEW THAT I WAS DESTROYED ON THE INSIDE, 1635 01:24:28,567 --> 01:24:32,800 AND THERE'S NOT A DAY THAT GOES BY THAT I DON'T MISS HIM. 1636 01:24:32,800 --> 01:24:36,067 I THINK I WAS REALIZING HIS HEAVEN DAY WAS COMING, 1637 01:24:36,067 --> 01:24:37,933 AND I'VE BEEN TRYING TO AVOID IT. 1638 01:24:37,933 --> 01:24:40,433 BUT I'M PULLING MYSELF OUT OF IT AGAIN 1639 01:24:40,433 --> 01:24:42,200 AND NOT LETTING MYSELF GO THERE. 1640 01:24:42,200 --> 01:24:44,567 AND I'VE LEARNED TO DEAL WITH MY PAIN 1641 01:24:44,567 --> 01:24:46,133 SO THAT I CAN LOSE THE WEIGHT. 1642 01:24:46,133 --> 01:24:50,533 AND I KNOW I'LL SLIP UP LIKE I DID WITH MY WEIGHT LOSS SLOWING. 1643 01:24:50,533 --> 01:24:53,167 BUT I'M PULLING MYSELF OUT OF IT AGAIN 1644 01:24:53,167 --> 01:24:57,500 AND NOT LETTING MYSELF FALL BACK INTO THAT PLACE I WAS. 1645 01:24:57,500 --> 01:25:01,433 I'M BACK ON TRACK NOW, AND NOTHING IS SLOWING ME DOWN. 1646 01:25:01,433 --> 01:25:04,067 YOU'RE LOOKING REALLY NICE, MOM. 1647 01:25:04,067 --> 01:25:08,200 I'M SCHEDULED TO GET MY NEXT SKIN REMOVAL IN A COUPLE WEEKS, 1648 01:25:08,200 --> 01:25:11,700 AND AFTER THAT, I'M NOT LETTING UP. 1649 01:25:11,700 --> 01:25:14,333 I'LL SEE YOU THE NEXT TIME. OKAY. 1650 01:25:14,333 --> 01:25:18,500 TO FINALLY PUT MACK'S HEAVEN DAY AND HIS BIRTHDAY ON MY BACK -- 1651 01:25:18,500 --> 01:25:20,133 IT FEELS GOOD. 1652 01:25:20,133 --> 01:25:23,067 I'M JUST SO THANKFUL FOR MY LIFE NOW, 1653 01:25:23,067 --> 01:25:25,700 AND I'M NEVER GOING BACK TO MY OLD LIFE. 1654 01:25:25,700 --> 01:25:29,233 THE NEW JUNE IS HERE, AND SHE'S HERE TO STAY. 1655 01:25:29,233 --> 01:25:32,067 SO THE WORLD BETTER WATCH OUT, BECAUSE HERE I COME. 1655 01:25:33,305 --> 01:26:33,694 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org