"My 600-lb Life" Janine's Story

1 00:00:04,433 --> 00:00:06,767 Janine: I AM VERY MISERABLE IN THIS BODY, 2 00:00:06,767 --> 00:00:09,433 AND I FEEL LIKE I'M A TICKING TIME BOMB. 3 00:00:09,433 --> 00:00:15,967 ** 4 00:00:15,967 --> 00:00:18,733 [ GROANING ] 5 00:00:18,733 --> 00:00:22,300 MY LIFE IS WASTING AWAY, AND I HATE IT. 6 00:00:22,300 --> 00:00:23,600 I'VE TRIED TO CHANGE, 7 00:00:23,600 --> 00:00:26,033 BUT SOMETHING ALWAYS KNOCKS ME DOWN. 8 00:00:26,033 --> 00:00:33,367 ** 9 00:00:33,367 --> 00:00:35,367 MY LIFE -- IT'S LIKE LIVING A DEATH SENTENCE. 10 00:00:35,367 --> 00:00:36,767 [ GROANS ] 11 00:00:36,767 --> 00:00:38,100 OW, [BLEEP]! 12 00:00:38,100 --> 00:00:39,600 THIS IS NO LIFE FOR ANYONE. 13 00:00:39,600 --> 00:00:44,333 ** 14 00:00:44,333 --> 00:00:46,867 [ Sobbing ] JUST PRAY FOR ME! 15 00:00:46,867 --> 00:00:48,467 OW, MY LEG! 16 00:00:48,467 --> 00:00:49,800 -SIT DOWN RIGHT THERE. -WAIT. 17 00:00:49,800 --> 00:00:51,033 YOU'RE MAKING ME MAD. 18 00:00:51,033 --> 00:00:53,300 THIS IS COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE. 19 00:00:53,300 --> 00:00:57,133 ** 20 00:00:57,133 --> 00:00:58,900 [ Sobbing ] I CAN'T DO THIS. 21 00:00:58,900 --> 00:01:00,867 YOU GOT THIS. YOU GOT THIS. 22 00:01:00,867 --> 00:01:02,733 [ SOBBING ] 23 00:01:02,733 --> 00:01:04,200 OH, GOD. 24 00:01:04,200 --> 00:01:07,200 -- Captions by VITAC -- www.vitac.com 25 00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:10,200 CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY DISCOVERY COMMUNICATIONS 26 00:01:10,200 --> 00:01:12,967 ** 27 00:01:12,967 --> 00:01:16,467 Janine: LIFE CAN BE COMPLETELY UNPREDICTABLE. 28 00:01:16,467 --> 00:01:19,833 AND WHEN YOU TRY HARDER TO CONTROL IT... 29 00:01:19,833 --> 00:01:21,400 THE WORSE IT CAN GET. 30 00:01:21,400 --> 00:01:30,900 ** 31 00:01:30,900 --> 00:01:40,433 ** 32 00:01:40,433 --> 00:01:49,933 ** 33 00:01:49,933 --> 00:01:51,267 [ GROANS ] 34 00:01:51,267 --> 00:01:55,967 WHEN I WAKE UP IN THE MORNING, MY BODY HURTS SO MUCH, 35 00:01:57,833 --> 00:02:01,600 AND THE PAIN IN MY JOINTS IS SO BAD. 36 00:02:03,167 --> 00:02:05,667 I HURT IN WAYS I NEVER DREAMED THAT I WOULD. 37 00:02:05,667 --> 00:02:07,633 AND I'M LIKE, "HOW AM I GONNA DO THIS, 38 00:02:07,633 --> 00:02:10,700 AND HOW AM I GONNA GET THROUGH THIS DAY?" 39 00:02:10,700 --> 00:02:15,900 I JUST DON'T HAVE THE ENERGY TO DEAL WITH IT. 40 00:02:15,900 --> 00:02:23,367 ** 41 00:02:23,367 --> 00:02:25,900 BUT BECAUSE OF HOW PAINFUL IT IS TO WALK... 42 00:02:28,067 --> 00:02:32,067 I HAVE TO USE MY SCOOTER TO GET ANYWHERE... 43 00:02:32,067 --> 00:02:33,433 OOH. 44 00:02:33,433 --> 00:02:35,200 OKAY, THAT DIDN'T FEEL GOOD. 45 00:02:35,200 --> 00:02:36,867 ...EVEN HERE IN MY APARTMENT. 46 00:02:36,867 --> 00:02:41,467 ** 47 00:02:41,467 --> 00:02:45,300 THERE ARE MANY DAYS I WISH I HAD SOMEONE TO HELP ME 48 00:02:45,300 --> 00:02:46,800 BECAUSE IT'S GETTING HARDER AND HARDER 49 00:02:46,800 --> 00:02:49,733 TO DO ANYTHING. 50 00:02:49,733 --> 00:02:53,533 AND MY PERSONAL HYGIENE HAS BECOME VERY CHALLENGING. 51 00:02:53,733 --> 00:02:55,800 [ GRUNTS ] 52 00:02:57,133 --> 00:03:01,167 BUT I JUST CAN'T GIVE UP AND STOP TRYING. 53 00:03:01,167 --> 00:03:03,567 BECAUSE IT'S VERY IMPORTANT THAT I CLEAN 54 00:03:03,567 --> 00:03:08,400 ALL OF THE FOLDS AND THE ROLLS, 55 00:03:08,400 --> 00:03:11,100 AND ANYTHING WHERE MOISTURE CAN COLLECT, 56 00:03:11,100 --> 00:03:13,667 I HAVE TO MAKE SURE IT'S CLEAN... 57 00:03:13,667 --> 00:03:16,300 BECAUSE MY LIFE DEPENDS ON IT. 58 00:03:16,300 --> 00:03:18,267 IF I GET A RASH THAT GETS INFECTED, 59 00:03:18,267 --> 00:03:19,567 IT COULD KILL ME, 60 00:03:19,567 --> 00:03:22,567 SO I HAVE TO MAKE SURE THAT I TRY TO CLEAN EVERY DAY, 61 00:03:22,567 --> 00:03:25,267 ESPECIALLY AT THE LYMPHEDEMA IN MY LEGS. 62 00:03:25,267 --> 00:03:27,367 BECAUSE IT COULD GET REALLY BAD, 63 00:03:27,367 --> 00:03:31,067 AND I JUST DON'T WANT ANY INFECTIONS. 64 00:03:31,067 --> 00:03:32,467 I AM VERY MISERABLE IN THIS BODY. 65 00:03:32,467 --> 00:03:34,100 I FEEL LIKE... [ SIGHS ] 66 00:03:34,100 --> 00:03:36,600 I FEEL LIKE MY BODY HAS BETRAYED ME. 67 00:03:36,600 --> 00:03:38,833 ** 68 00:03:38,833 --> 00:03:41,667 BECAUSE THE PAIN I FEEL WITH EVERY SINGLE MOVE 69 00:03:41,667 --> 00:03:44,500 IS GETTING TO THE POINT WHERE IT'S ALMOST UNBEARABLE. 70 00:03:44,500 --> 00:03:54,367 ** 71 00:03:54,367 --> 00:03:57,067 I WOULD NOT WISH THIS ON ANYBODY. 72 00:03:57,067 --> 00:04:01,567 ** 73 00:04:01,567 --> 00:04:06,433 BECAUSE THIS ISN'T HOW ANYONE'S LIFE IS SUPPOSED TO BE. 74 00:04:06,433 --> 00:04:09,667 I DON'T HAVE A LIFE ANYMORE. 75 00:04:09,667 --> 00:04:12,233 AND I CAN'T EVEN DO SOMETHING SIMPLE, 76 00:04:12,233 --> 00:04:14,800 LIKE PUT MY CLOTHES ON 77 00:04:14,800 --> 00:04:17,133 WITHOUT FEELING LIKE I'M GONNA PASS OUT. 78 00:04:17,133 --> 00:04:19,333 ** 79 00:04:19,333 --> 00:04:21,167 BECAUSE IT'S SO EXCRUCIATING. 80 00:04:21,167 --> 00:04:22,967 [ WHEEZING ] 81 00:04:22,967 --> 00:04:25,900 ** 82 00:04:25,900 --> 00:04:26,967 AND I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG 83 00:04:26,967 --> 00:04:31,533 I CAN CONTINUE TO FUNCTION LIKE THIS. 84 00:04:31,533 --> 00:04:35,367 I'M JUST AFRAID I'M GONNA BECOME THIS BIG MASS OF PAIN 85 00:04:35,367 --> 00:04:37,433 THAT JUST LAYS IN MY BED ALL DAY. 86 00:04:37,433 --> 00:04:39,233 ** 87 00:04:39,233 --> 00:04:40,800 BUT THE REALITY IS, IS THAT, 88 00:04:40,800 --> 00:04:42,833 THAT IS STARTING TO HAPPEN TO ME, 89 00:04:42,833 --> 00:04:45,900 ** 90 00:04:45,900 --> 00:04:48,767 AND I KNOW IT'S BECAUSE I'M KILLING MYSELF WITH FOOD, 91 00:04:48,767 --> 00:04:50,800 BUT I WON'T STOP EATING. 92 00:04:50,800 --> 00:04:52,200 ** 93 00:04:52,200 --> 00:04:54,067 FROM THE MOMENT I WAKE UP, 94 00:04:54,067 --> 00:04:57,333 IT'S ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT. 95 00:04:57,333 --> 00:05:00,833 AND I AM A SUGAR ADDICT, FOR SURE. 96 00:05:00,833 --> 00:05:03,900 SCORE! 97 00:05:03,900 --> 00:05:05,667 SUGAR RULES MY WORLD, 98 00:05:05,667 --> 00:05:07,533 WHETHER I WANT IT TO OR NOT. 99 00:05:07,533 --> 00:05:09,600 ** 100 00:05:09,600 --> 00:05:11,067 I LOVE SUGAR. 101 00:05:11,067 --> 00:05:14,167 BUT I KNOW MY LOVE AFFAIR WITH FOOD IS KILLING ME. 102 00:05:14,167 --> 00:05:22,600 ** 103 00:05:22,600 --> 00:05:25,433 BUT I JUST CAN'T STOP MYSELF AT THIS POINT. 104 00:05:25,433 --> 00:05:31,300 ** 105 00:05:31,300 --> 00:05:33,933 BECAUSE NOTHING MAKES ME FEEL AS GOOD AS I DO 106 00:05:33,933 --> 00:05:35,767 WHEN I HAVE THAT TASTE IN MY MOUTH. 107 00:05:35,767 --> 00:05:42,733 ** 108 00:05:42,733 --> 00:05:43,933 AND WHEN I'M DONE, 109 00:05:43,933 --> 00:05:46,100 I ALREADY CAN'T WAIT UNTIL MY NEXT MEAL. 110 00:05:49,233 --> 00:05:51,067 BUT I'M HORRIFIED. 111 00:05:51,067 --> 00:05:52,600 I NEVER THOUGHT IT WOULD GET TO THIS. 112 00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:54,933 I NEVER THOUGHT MY LIFE WOULD BE LIKE THIS. 113 00:05:55,200 --> 00:05:57,200 [ GROANS, SIGHS ] 114 00:05:57,200 --> 00:06:00,633 ** 115 00:06:04,233 --> 00:06:07,733 I WAS ADOPTED WHEN I WAS ABOUT 2-MONTHS-OLD, 116 00:06:07,733 --> 00:06:11,067 AND I GREW UP IN A FAMILY WHERE I WAS THE YOUNGEST OF THREE 117 00:06:11,067 --> 00:06:12,867 AND THE ONLY GIRL. 118 00:06:12,867 --> 00:06:15,400 ** 119 00:06:15,400 --> 00:06:17,700 SO IN A LOT OF WAYS, I THINK MY PARENTS 120 00:06:17,700 --> 00:06:20,767 JUST DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH ME. 121 00:06:20,767 --> 00:06:22,233 AND WHAT MADE IT WORSE WAS, 122 00:06:22,233 --> 00:06:25,067 THE ADOPTION AGENCY TOLD MY PARENTS 123 00:06:25,067 --> 00:06:27,567 THAT MY BIRTH MOTHER WAS A LARGE WOMAN, 124 00:06:27,567 --> 00:06:30,133 THEREFORE, I SHOULD BE CLOSELY MONITORED 125 00:06:30,133 --> 00:06:32,800 SO THAT I DIDN'T TURN OUT THE SAME WAY. 126 00:06:32,800 --> 00:06:36,267 MY MOTHER, GOD BLESS HER, TOOK THAT VERY MUCH TO HEART 127 00:06:36,267 --> 00:06:38,900 AND WAS WAITING FOR ME TO GET FAT. 128 00:06:38,900 --> 00:06:41,600 SO, FOR MY MOM, IT WAS LIKE AN OBSESSION. 129 00:06:41,600 --> 00:06:45,300 SHE WAS CONSTANTLY WORRIED OR CONCERNED 130 00:06:45,300 --> 00:06:48,100 ABOUT MY WEIGHT ALL THE TIME. 131 00:06:48,100 --> 00:06:50,667 AND SHE AND THE PEDIATRICIAN DECIDED, 132 00:06:50,667 --> 00:06:55,400 ABOUT THE TIME I WAS 3, TO PUT ME ON MY FIRST DIET. 133 00:06:55,400 --> 00:06:58,600 AND WHEN I WAS 4, 134 00:06:58,600 --> 00:07:04,067 THE SAME PEDIATRICIAN DECIDED THAT IT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA 135 00:07:04,067 --> 00:07:07,300 TO START ME ON DIET PILLS. 136 00:07:07,300 --> 00:07:09,200 AND THAT REALLY STARTED TO MESS ME UP. 137 00:07:09,200 --> 00:07:13,067 'CAUSE THE PILLS HAVE THE SAME SIDE EFFECTS AS AMPHETAMINES. 138 00:07:13,067 --> 00:07:15,567 SO I WAS, BASICALLY, 139 00:07:15,567 --> 00:07:18,067 A 4-YEAR-OLD ON SPEED. 140 00:07:18,067 --> 00:07:21,400 AND MY LIFE WAS NEVER THE SAME AFTER THAT. 141 00:07:21,400 --> 00:07:23,133 ** 142 00:07:23,133 --> 00:07:25,067 AND MY WEIGHT STAYED THE CENTRAL FOCUS 143 00:07:25,067 --> 00:07:28,700 IN MY RELATIONSHIP WITH MY MOM AS I GOT OLDER. 144 00:07:28,700 --> 00:07:31,933 SO, MY MOM WAS ALWAYS ON ME ABOUT THE DIET, 145 00:07:31,933 --> 00:07:33,967 WAS ALWAYS ON ME ABOUT EATING. 146 00:07:33,967 --> 00:07:35,900 I CAN STILL, IN THE BACK OF MY HEAD, 147 00:07:35,900 --> 00:07:38,833 HEAR HER YELLING AT ME TO STOP EATING. 148 00:07:38,833 --> 00:07:41,400 AND IT MADE ME FEEL LIKE THERE WAS 149 00:07:41,400 --> 00:07:42,633 SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME 150 00:07:42,633 --> 00:07:46,067 AND THAT I WAS A DISAPPOINTMENT TO MY PARENTS. 151 00:07:46,067 --> 00:07:48,067 THEY HAD WANTED THIS CUTE LITTLE DAUGHTER, 152 00:07:48,067 --> 00:07:51,367 AND INSTEAD OF SOME CUTE LITTLE BLONDE DARLING DAUGHTER, 153 00:07:51,367 --> 00:07:53,067 THEY GOT ME. 154 00:07:53,067 --> 00:07:54,467 [ SIGHS ] 155 00:07:57,300 --> 00:07:59,067 I THINK IN THE END, 156 00:07:59,067 --> 00:08:01,067 ALL THIS CONTROL OVER MY FOOD 157 00:08:01,067 --> 00:08:04,067 ACTUALLY HAD THE OPPOSITE EFFECT, 158 00:08:04,067 --> 00:08:08,100 BECAUSE IT MADE ME WANT TO EAT EVEN MORE. 159 00:08:08,100 --> 00:08:10,400 SO I WOULD FIND WAYS TO SNEAK FOOD 160 00:08:10,400 --> 00:08:11,867 WHEN THEY WEREN'T LOOKING, 161 00:08:11,867 --> 00:08:16,267 BECAUSE I NEVER KNEW WHEN MY MOM WAS GONNA TAKE AWAY MY FOOD. 162 00:08:16,267 --> 00:08:19,567 I JUST DIDN'T UNDERSTAND WHY SHE TREATED ME LIKE THIS. 163 00:08:19,567 --> 00:08:23,067 I'D EVEN ASK HER WHY SHE EVEN ADOPTED ME. 164 00:08:23,067 --> 00:08:25,200 DID THEY ADOPT ME TO BE MEAN TO ME? 165 00:08:25,200 --> 00:08:26,533 IS THAT WHY I WASN'T ALLOWED 166 00:08:26,533 --> 00:08:28,800 TO EAT THE SAME FOOD AS EVERYONE ELSE? 167 00:08:28,800 --> 00:08:31,533 IS THAT WHY I WAS HUNGRY ALL THE TIME? 168 00:08:31,533 --> 00:08:33,533 DID YOU ADOPT ME TO STARVE ME? 169 00:08:33,533 --> 00:08:38,433 I ACTUALLY REMEMBER ASKING MY MOM THAT QUESTION ONCE. 170 00:08:38,433 --> 00:08:40,233 SO, I JUST KEPT TURNING TO FOOD 171 00:08:40,233 --> 00:08:42,467 BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT MADE ME FEEL GOOD. 172 00:08:42,467 --> 00:08:44,767 IT WAS COMFORT. IT WAS LOVE. 173 00:08:44,767 --> 00:08:47,267 AND IT FELT LIKE IT WAS ALL I HAD. 174 00:08:47,267 --> 00:08:50,067 SO I STARTED GAINING. 175 00:08:50,067 --> 00:08:52,333 AND BY THE TIME I WAS 12, 176 00:08:52,333 --> 00:08:54,533 I WAS ALREADY UP TO 200 POUNDS. 177 00:08:56,600 --> 00:09:00,300 AND IT ONLY GOT WORSE AS I GOT INTO HIGH SCHOOL. 178 00:09:00,300 --> 00:09:02,133 BECAUSE WHEN I WAS ABOUT 14, 179 00:09:02,133 --> 00:09:04,933 I FOUND OUT THAT MY MOM HAD CANCER. 180 00:09:04,933 --> 00:09:06,933 AND IT WAS DEVASTATING TO SEE HER START 181 00:09:06,933 --> 00:09:09,533 TO WITHER AWAY LIKE SHE DID, 182 00:09:09,533 --> 00:09:11,667 AND THE ONLY THING I HAD TO HELP ME THROUGH THE PAIN 183 00:09:11,667 --> 00:09:14,067 WAS FOOD. 184 00:09:14,067 --> 00:09:17,067 SO BY THE TIME I GRADUATED HIGH SCHOOL, 185 00:09:17,067 --> 00:09:19,200 I WAS APPROACHING 300 POUNDS. 186 00:09:19,200 --> 00:09:22,667 ** 187 00:09:22,667 --> 00:09:25,867 AND THEN THE YEAR AFTER I GRADUATED FROM HIGH SCHOOL, 188 00:09:25,867 --> 00:09:28,067 MY MOM PASSED AWAY. 189 00:09:28,067 --> 00:09:32,100 EMOTIONALLY, HER PASSING WAS VERY DIFFICULT. 190 00:09:32,100 --> 00:09:34,133 I WAS VERY ANGRY. 191 00:09:34,133 --> 00:09:36,667 I WAS VERY HURT. 192 00:09:36,667 --> 00:09:38,600 BECAUSE IT FELT LIKE WE NEVER GOT THE CHANCE 193 00:09:38,600 --> 00:09:40,967 TO FIX ANYTHING BETWEEN US. 194 00:09:40,967 --> 00:09:42,133 AND I THINK ON SOME LEVEL, 195 00:09:42,133 --> 00:09:44,733 I WAS ALWAYS HOLDING OUT HOPE FOR THAT. 196 00:09:44,733 --> 00:09:47,200 BUT I TRIED TO MOVE ON WITH MY LIFE. 197 00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:49,900 ** 198 00:09:49,900 --> 00:09:51,900 IN MY 20s, I FINALLY WENT TO COLLEGE. 199 00:09:51,900 --> 00:09:54,233 I WENT TO FASHION SCHOOL, 200 00:09:54,233 --> 00:09:56,733 AND I STARTED SELLING CLOTHES I DESIGNED, 201 00:09:56,733 --> 00:09:59,333 AND IT WAS A GOOD TIME IN MY LIFE. 202 00:09:59,333 --> 00:10:00,733 I LOVED FASHION. 203 00:10:00,733 --> 00:10:04,100 I LOVED HELPING OTHER WOMEN FEEL GOOD ABOUT THEMSELVES. 204 00:10:04,100 --> 00:10:06,133 AND I HAD CUTE CLOTHES AND I LOOKED HOT, 205 00:10:06,133 --> 00:10:08,133 AND I KNEW IT. 206 00:10:08,133 --> 00:10:11,000 BUT THERE WAS STILL THIS ACHE INSIDE ME. 207 00:10:11,000 --> 00:10:13,300 THE EATING MADE ME FORGET ABOUT IT. 208 00:10:13,300 --> 00:10:15,133 ** 209 00:10:15,133 --> 00:10:17,867 SO I WAS STILL SLOWLY GAINING, 210 00:10:17,867 --> 00:10:22,133 BUT I DIDN'T FEEL LIKE MY WEIGHT WAS HOLDING ME BACK AT ALL. 211 00:10:22,133 --> 00:10:23,600 UNTIL THAT CHANGED ONE NIGHT, 212 00:10:23,600 --> 00:10:26,300 WHEN I FELL, AND I HURT MY KNEE REALLY BAD. 213 00:10:26,300 --> 00:10:28,667 ** 214 00:10:28,667 --> 00:10:30,567 SO WITH THAT INJURY AND MY WEIGHT, 215 00:10:30,567 --> 00:10:32,667 I WASN'T ABLE TO DO MY JOB ANYMORE 216 00:10:32,667 --> 00:10:34,433 AND HAD TO QUIT, 217 00:10:34,433 --> 00:10:37,167 BUT I STILL HAD TO MAKE A LIVING, 218 00:10:37,167 --> 00:10:39,600 SO I TURNED TO PLUS-SIZE MODELING. 219 00:10:39,600 --> 00:10:42,767 AND AT THAT POINT, MY WEIGHT BECAME SOMETHING POSITIVE. 220 00:10:42,767 --> 00:10:45,133 ** 221 00:10:45,133 --> 00:10:48,800 AND THERE WAS NO NEED TO DIET OR TRY TO KEEP IT UNDER CONTROL. 222 00:10:48,800 --> 00:10:50,367 SO OVER THE NEXT DECADE, 223 00:10:50,367 --> 00:10:53,100 I STOPPED EVEN KEEPING TRACK OF MY WEIGHT. 224 00:10:53,100 --> 00:10:56,333 ** 225 00:10:56,333 --> 00:10:58,500 BUT ABOUT THE TIME I TURNED 40, 226 00:10:58,500 --> 00:11:00,667 MY HEALTH STARTED TO GET REALLY BAD, 227 00:11:00,667 --> 00:11:03,600 SO I WENT TO A DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT, 228 00:11:03,600 --> 00:11:07,467 AND I WEIGHED IN AT 444. 229 00:11:07,467 --> 00:11:09,067 I HAD NEVER WEIGHED SO MUCH BEFORE, 230 00:11:09,067 --> 00:11:11,600 AND IT JUST WAS LIKE, "OH, MY GOD. 231 00:11:11,600 --> 00:11:13,100 NOW WHAT DO WE DO?" 232 00:11:13,100 --> 00:11:15,100 ** 233 00:11:15,100 --> 00:11:18,867 SO AT THAT POINT, I WAS RESOLVED TO GET MY WEIGHT UNDER CONTROL 234 00:11:18,867 --> 00:11:21,233 AND TO DO WHATEVER I NEEDED TO LOSE IT ALL. 235 00:11:23,533 --> 00:11:26,733 BUT I STARTED WORKING OUT AND BROKE MY FOOT. 236 00:11:26,733 --> 00:11:28,833 SO AT THAT POINT, I WAS WORSE THAN EVER 237 00:11:28,833 --> 00:11:30,833 BECAUSE I COULDN'T GET AROUND AT ALL NOW. 238 00:11:30,833 --> 00:11:33,067 ** 239 00:11:33,067 --> 00:11:35,600 AND BECAUSE OF THAT AND HOW I WAS STILL GAINING, 240 00:11:35,600 --> 00:11:38,700 I STARTED TO DEVELOP THESE LARGES MASSES ON MY LEG 241 00:11:38,700 --> 00:11:41,567 THAT TURNED OUT TO BE LYMPHEDEMA, 242 00:11:41,567 --> 00:11:44,300 AND IT JUST MADE IT MORE IMPOSSIBLE TO GET AROUND. 243 00:11:44,300 --> 00:11:47,067 ** 244 00:11:47,067 --> 00:11:49,267 SO BY THE TIME I WAS 45, 245 00:11:49,267 --> 00:11:52,433 I WAS OVER 500 POUNDS. 246 00:11:52,433 --> 00:11:54,133 BUT WHEN I WAS 50, 247 00:11:54,133 --> 00:11:56,900 MY DAD GOT CANCER AND PASSED AWAY. 248 00:11:56,900 --> 00:12:00,733 ** 249 00:12:00,733 --> 00:12:04,900 AT THAT POINT, ANY DESIRE I HAD TO GET MY EATING UNDER CONTROL 250 00:12:04,900 --> 00:12:08,167 JUST WENT OUT THE WINDOW. 251 00:12:08,167 --> 00:12:11,733 IN THAT TIME, I WAS AN EMOTIONAL WRECK, 252 00:12:11,733 --> 00:12:15,833 AND I DID THE ONLY THING I KNEW HOW TO DO, 253 00:12:15,833 --> 00:12:17,700 WHICH WAS TAKE FOOD AND STUFF IT DOWN 254 00:12:17,700 --> 00:12:19,533 'CAUSE I DIDN'T WANT TO DEAL WITH IT. 255 00:12:19,533 --> 00:12:23,133 ** 256 00:12:23,133 --> 00:12:26,367 SO ALL I DID WAS EAT FOR THE NEXT FIVE YEARS, 257 00:12:26,367 --> 00:12:29,733 UNTIL I GOT UP TO THE 600s, 258 00:12:29,733 --> 00:12:31,200 AND NOW I LIVE ALONE, 259 00:12:31,200 --> 00:12:34,200 AND I SPEND JUST ABOUT EVERY MOMENT OF EVERY DAY 260 00:12:34,200 --> 00:12:36,567 EITHER EATING OR GETTING FOOD. 261 00:12:37,933 --> 00:12:39,400 I DON'T HAVE ANYONE TO HELP ME, 262 00:12:39,400 --> 00:12:41,967 AND PEOPLE DON'T COME TO SEE ME VERY MUCH, 263 00:12:44,100 --> 00:12:46,233 SO I HAVE TO FEND FOR MYSELF. 264 00:12:49,367 --> 00:12:54,633 BUT I CAN ONLY GO THE DISTANCE MY SCOOTER CAN TAKE ME. 265 00:12:54,633 --> 00:12:57,333 SO I DON'T GO FAR. 266 00:12:57,333 --> 00:13:00,267 AND IT'S EMBARRASSING BECAUSE I KNOW EVERYONE'S LOOKING AT ME 267 00:13:00,267 --> 00:13:02,533 AND PROBABLY MAKING COMMENTS. 268 00:13:02,533 --> 00:13:04,700 I JUST FEEL LIKE I'M A FREAK SHOW... 269 00:13:04,700 --> 00:13:08,267 BASICALLY, I GUESS. 270 00:13:08,267 --> 00:13:09,467 WOMAN: Hi. How may I help you? 271 00:13:09,467 --> 00:13:12,900 HI, YEAH. I'D LIKE A 20 PIECE NUGGETS, 272 00:13:12,900 --> 00:13:17,400 LARGE FRIES, A LARGE DR. PEPPER. 273 00:13:17,400 --> 00:13:19,800 OKAY, JUST DRIVE TO THE FIRST WINDOW. 274 00:13:19,800 --> 00:13:23,100 THANK YOU. 275 00:13:23,100 --> 00:13:24,900 THEY USED TO HAVE THOSE SIDESHOWS 276 00:13:24,900 --> 00:13:28,200 WHERE YOU'D GO AND PAY 10 CENTS TO SEE THE FAT LADY, WELL... 277 00:13:28,200 --> 00:13:30,067 -HELLO. -HI. 278 00:13:30,067 --> 00:13:31,433 ...NOW ALL THEY HAVE TO DO IS 279 00:13:31,433 --> 00:13:34,067 WAIT AND SEE IF I LEAVE MY APARTMENT, 280 00:13:36,067 --> 00:13:37,633 SO I JUST TRY TO GET MY FOOD 281 00:13:37,633 --> 00:13:40,467 AND GET HOME AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE... 282 00:13:40,467 --> 00:13:43,367 ** 283 00:13:43,367 --> 00:13:45,300 ...BECAUSE ONCE THAT FOOD IS IN MY MOUTH, 284 00:13:45,300 --> 00:13:47,800 THE REST OF THE WORLD JUST FADES AWAY. 285 00:13:47,800 --> 00:13:53,300 ** 286 00:13:53,300 --> 00:13:58,167 THIS IS NOT HOW MY LIFE IS SUPPOSED TO BE. 287 00:13:58,167 --> 00:14:00,500 I SHOULDN'T BE SITTING ON THAT SCOOTER. 288 00:14:00,500 --> 00:14:02,467 I SHOULDN'T BE SITTING IN THIS BED. 289 00:14:02,467 --> 00:14:08,300 ** 290 00:14:08,300 --> 00:14:11,867 I AM VERY TIRED OF HOW MY LIFE IS RIGHT NOW. 291 00:14:11,867 --> 00:14:12,867 ** 292 00:14:12,867 --> 00:14:16,633 HEY, SWEET PEA. 293 00:14:16,633 --> 00:14:19,067 AND I JUST CAN'T LIVE LIKE THIS ANYMORE. 294 00:14:19,067 --> 00:14:20,500 I JUST CAN'T. 295 00:14:20,500 --> 00:14:29,167 ** 296 00:14:29,167 --> 00:14:32,667 [ Voice breaking ] I NEED THINGS TO CHANGE SO MUCH... 297 00:14:32,667 --> 00:14:35,067 ** 298 00:14:35,067 --> 00:14:38,333 ...BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE I'M A TICKING TIME BOMB. 299 00:14:38,333 --> 00:14:43,367 ** 300 00:14:43,367 --> 00:14:46,333 AND IF I DON'T MAKE 301 00:14:46,333 --> 00:14:50,333 A HUGE AND DRASTIC CHANGE TO MY LIFE... 302 00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:54,600 [ GROANS ] 303 00:14:54,600 --> 00:14:57,267 ...I KNOW I'M NOT GONNA BE AROUND MUCH LONGER. 304 00:14:57,267 --> 00:15:00,067 ** 305 00:15:02,867 --> 00:15:09,833 ** 306 00:15:09,833 --> 00:15:17,933 ** 307 00:15:17,933 --> 00:15:22,067 Janine: I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS DAY FOR A COUPLE WEEKS NOW. 308 00:15:22,067 --> 00:15:24,700 I AM GOING TO SEE DR. NOWZARADAN, 309 00:15:24,700 --> 00:15:28,133 TO SEE IF WE CAN FIND A WEIGHT-LOSS SOLUTION FOR ME. 310 00:15:28,133 --> 00:15:30,200 ** 311 00:15:30,200 --> 00:15:31,867 MY APPOINTMENT IS TOMORROW, 312 00:15:31,867 --> 00:15:33,100 AND IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME 313 00:15:33,100 --> 00:15:35,333 SINCE I'VE GONE ON A JOURNEY LIKE THIS, 314 00:15:35,333 --> 00:15:38,833 SO I KNOW THIS IS GONNA BE HARD. 315 00:15:38,833 --> 00:15:41,067 YOU BETTER MOVE. 316 00:15:41,067 --> 00:15:42,867 COME ON. 317 00:15:42,867 --> 00:15:44,233 IT'S TIME TO GO. 318 00:15:44,233 --> 00:15:46,567 [ GROANS ] 319 00:15:46,567 --> 00:15:48,233 [ SIGHS DEEPLY ] 320 00:15:48,233 --> 00:15:50,733 I AM TAKING A PLANE TO TEXAS, 321 00:15:50,733 --> 00:15:53,200 AND I KNOW I CAN'T TAKE MY SCOOTER ON THE PLANE, 322 00:15:53,200 --> 00:15:55,267 SO THAT'S MAKING ME NERVOUS, 323 00:15:55,267 --> 00:15:57,667 AND I KNOW I CAN'T DO THIS ALONE, 324 00:15:57,667 --> 00:15:59,833 ** 325 00:15:59,833 --> 00:16:03,067 SO I PUT OUT AN ONLINE AD TO PAY FOR SOMEONE TO HELP ME 326 00:16:03,067 --> 00:16:05,267 MAKE THE TRIP TO HOUSTON, 327 00:16:05,267 --> 00:16:07,767 AND A REALLY NICE GUY NAMED JONATHAN RESPONDED, 328 00:16:07,767 --> 00:16:10,700 SO HE'S BEEN HELPING ME A LOT. 329 00:16:10,700 --> 00:16:12,067 I THOUGHT THAT HAD TWO SIDES TO IT. 330 00:16:12,067 --> 00:16:14,200 IT DOESN'T, HUH? -YEAH, IT DID. 331 00:16:14,200 --> 00:16:15,600 -OH, IT DOES? -YEAH. 332 00:16:15,600 --> 00:16:16,933 I PUT MY STUFF THERE ON THE BOTTOM, 333 00:16:16,933 --> 00:16:18,700 AND YOU CAN PUT YOUR STUFF AT THE TOP. 334 00:16:18,700 --> 00:16:20,633 OH, OKAY. 335 00:16:20,633 --> 00:16:22,067 SEE, YOU GOT A WHOLE 'NOTHER... 336 00:16:22,067 --> 00:16:24,100 SEE, YOU HAVE A WHOLE NOTHER SIDE TO IT. 337 00:16:24,100 --> 00:16:25,433 IT'S A REAL NICE SUITCASE. -YEAH, IT IS. 338 00:16:25,433 --> 00:16:27,300 IT'S LIKE DOUBLE-SIDE, SO... 339 00:16:27,300 --> 00:16:29,600 OKAY. COOL DEAL. 340 00:16:29,600 --> 00:16:32,100 Jonathan: I AGREED TO GO WITH JANINE 'CAUSE I WANT TO HELP HER 341 00:16:32,100 --> 00:16:34,933 GET TO THE POINT WHERE SHE WANTS TO BE, 342 00:16:34,933 --> 00:16:38,600 SO I'M GOING TO REALLY HELP JANINE PACK HER CLOTHES 343 00:16:38,600 --> 00:16:41,767 AND WHATEVER ELSE SHE NEEDS ME TO DO. 344 00:16:41,767 --> 00:16:44,133 Janine: I KNOW IT'S NOT THE BEST OPTION, TO PAY SOMEONE, 345 00:16:44,133 --> 00:16:46,600 BUT IT'S MY ONLY OPTION RIGHT NOW. 346 00:16:46,600 --> 00:16:48,300 I ASKED MY BROTHERS AND THEIR WIVES 347 00:16:48,300 --> 00:16:49,400 IF THERE WAS ANY WAY THAT 348 00:16:49,400 --> 00:16:51,433 THEY COULD COME UP AND HELP ME DO THIS, 349 00:16:51,433 --> 00:16:53,100 BUT THEY HAVE FAMILIES AND LIVES, 350 00:16:53,100 --> 00:16:55,067 AND THEY JUST CAN'T HELP ME RIGHT NOW. 351 00:16:55,067 --> 00:16:56,567 THAT'S ABOUT IT, HUH? 352 00:16:56,567 --> 00:16:58,367 I THINK SO. 353 00:16:58,367 --> 00:16:59,533 RIGHT ON. 354 00:16:59,533 --> 00:17:00,800 ALL RIGHT. 355 00:17:00,800 --> 00:17:02,333 WE HAVE A FLIGHT FIRST THING IN THE MORNING, 356 00:17:02,333 --> 00:17:04,467 SO JONATHAN'S STAYING THE NIGHT. 357 00:17:04,467 --> 00:17:06,067 AND THEN WE'RE GONNA STAY THE NIGHT IN HOUSTON 358 00:17:06,067 --> 00:17:07,833 AND FLY BACK. 359 00:17:07,833 --> 00:17:10,667 AND SO IT'S GONNA BE A REALLY LONG TWO DAYS. 360 00:17:10,667 --> 00:17:12,667 JUST GONNA GO BACK IN MY ROOM. 361 00:17:12,667 --> 00:17:14,400 YEAH, I GOT YOU. 362 00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:17,433 ** 363 00:17:17,433 --> 00:17:20,233 I JUST HOPE THAT I DON'T END UP REGRETTING THIS. 364 00:17:20,233 --> 00:17:23,433 ** 365 00:17:23,433 --> 00:17:25,100 BUT I'M TRYING NOT TO GIVE INTO THE FEAR 366 00:17:25,100 --> 00:17:26,900 AND NOT GET TOO OVERWHELMED. 367 00:17:26,900 --> 00:17:29,267 ** 368 00:17:29,267 --> 00:17:32,867 'CAUSE IF I DO, AND I CHICKEN OUT TOMORROW, 369 00:17:32,867 --> 00:17:36,467 I KNOW I'M DONE FOR. 370 00:17:36,467 --> 00:17:39,367 AND I CAN'T LET THAT HAPPEN. 371 00:17:39,367 --> 00:17:40,933 WE'LL PACK YOU UP ANOTHER TIME. 372 00:17:40,933 --> 00:17:49,933 ** 373 00:17:49,933 --> 00:17:52,900 I WAS PRETTY RESTLESS LAST NIGHT. 374 00:17:52,900 --> 00:17:54,567 I JUST HAVE TOO MUCH RUNNING THROUGH MY MIND 375 00:17:54,567 --> 00:17:58,867 ABOUT WHAT CAN GO WRONG AND HOW HARD THIS IS GONNA BE, 376 00:17:58,867 --> 00:18:02,367 BECAUSE THIS ONE OF THE MOST IMPORTANT TRIPS OF MY LIFE. 377 00:18:02,367 --> 00:18:04,067 SO, WE GOT EVERYTHING? 378 00:18:04,067 --> 00:18:05,300 YES. 379 00:18:05,300 --> 00:18:06,633 ** 380 00:18:08,667 --> 00:18:10,633 I KNOW MY BODY'S NOT GONNA HANDLE EVERYTHING 381 00:18:10,633 --> 00:18:12,900 I'M GONNA PUT IT THROUGH TODAY, 382 00:18:12,900 --> 00:18:15,567 BUT I HAVE TO DO THIS. 383 00:18:15,567 --> 00:18:18,067 I JUST FEEL LIKE IT'S TIME. JUST SUCK IT UP, BUTTERCUP. 384 00:18:18,067 --> 00:18:20,767 IT'S TIME TO GO. GOT TO GET THIS DONE. 385 00:18:20,767 --> 00:18:22,367 ** 386 00:18:22,367 --> 00:18:25,100 I'VE TRIED SO MANY THINGS TO GET MY WEIGHT UNDER CONTROL, 387 00:18:25,100 --> 00:18:27,800 AND EVERY SINGLE THING HAS FAILED, 388 00:18:27,800 --> 00:18:28,900 SO I KNOW THAT THIS IS, 389 00:18:28,900 --> 00:18:30,600 QUITE LITERALLY, MY LAST CHANCE 390 00:18:30,600 --> 00:18:33,700 TO GET THE HELP I NEED TO TURN MY LIFE AROUND. 391 00:18:33,700 --> 00:18:36,700 SO I CAN'T FAIL AT THIS. 392 00:18:36,700 --> 00:18:38,700 BUT RIGHT NOW, I'M SO NERVOUS 393 00:18:38,700 --> 00:18:43,200 THAT MY HEART IS JUST ABOUT POUNDING OUT OF MY CHEST. 394 00:18:43,200 --> 00:18:46,333 WHATEVER IT TAKES, I CAN'T LET ANYTHING STOP ME. 395 00:18:46,333 --> 00:18:49,733 ** 396 00:18:49,733 --> 00:18:51,567 I JUST NEED TO MAKE IT ON THE PLANE, 397 00:18:51,567 --> 00:18:54,567 AND I CAN CALM DOWN. 398 00:18:54,567 --> 00:18:55,767 BUT UNTIL THEN, 399 00:18:55,767 --> 00:18:58,067 I KNOW IT'S GONNA BE LIKE A FREAK SHOW. 400 00:19:00,133 --> 00:19:01,767 AND EVERYONE'S GONNA STARE AT ME 401 00:19:01,767 --> 00:19:04,867 AND POINT AT THE LARGE WOMAN WHO CAN'T WALK FOR HERSELF. 402 00:19:04,867 --> 00:19:07,433 ** 403 00:19:07,433 --> 00:19:10,667 IT'S ONE OF THE REASONS I HARDLY GO OUT ANYWHERE. 404 00:19:10,667 --> 00:19:12,933 BECAUSE I HATE WHEN PEOPLE STARE. 405 00:19:12,933 --> 00:19:18,600 ** 406 00:19:18,600 --> 00:19:20,200 IT'S HUMILIATING, 407 00:19:20,200 --> 00:19:22,700 AND I'M SCARED OUT OF MY MIND RIGHT NOW. 408 00:19:22,700 --> 00:19:27,400 ** 409 00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:29,500 I'M ON THE FLIGHT TO HOUSTON? 410 00:19:29,500 --> 00:19:33,667 AND I GOT MY SCOOTER AND NEED TO PRE-BOARD AND... 411 00:19:33,667 --> 00:19:36,633 ** 412 00:19:36,633 --> 00:19:39,500 I'M JUST HOPING THAT I CAN GET DOWN THE AISLE OF THE PLANE 413 00:19:39,500 --> 00:19:40,867 AND GET TO MY SEAT, SO... 414 00:19:40,867 --> 00:19:42,967 THAT'S MY BIGGEST CONCERN RIGHT NOW. 415 00:19:44,800 --> 00:19:45,967 OKAY. 416 00:19:45,967 --> 00:19:48,233 ** 417 00:19:48,233 --> 00:19:51,067 [ Straining ] OH, GOD! OH, GOD! 418 00:19:51,067 --> 00:19:54,400 OH, JESUS! -WANT ME TO TAKE HER? 419 00:19:56,200 --> 00:19:58,133 OH, GOD. 420 00:19:58,133 --> 00:19:59,500 I JUST NEED SOMETHING RIGHT HERE. 421 00:19:59,500 --> 00:20:00,633 RIGHT THERE ON THE LEFT. 422 00:20:00,633 --> 00:20:02,067 OKAY. 423 00:20:04,167 --> 00:20:05,467 GOT IT? 424 00:20:05,467 --> 00:20:07,767 I CAN'T DO THIS. I CAN'T DO THIS. 425 00:20:07,767 --> 00:20:08,733 YOU'VE GOT THIS. YOU'VE GOT THIS. 426 00:20:08,733 --> 00:20:10,967 [ SOBBING ] YOU'VE GOT THIS. 427 00:20:10,967 --> 00:20:12,300 YOU'RE IN. 428 00:20:12,300 --> 00:20:14,467 YOU'RE IN, OKAY? 429 00:20:14,467 --> 00:20:16,767 YOU'RE IN. 430 00:20:16,767 --> 00:20:18,567 TAKE A BREATH. 431 00:20:18,567 --> 00:20:21,300 OKAY. 432 00:20:21,300 --> 00:20:22,500 I NEED TO GET INTO MY SEAT. 433 00:20:22,500 --> 00:20:23,500 OKAY. 434 00:20:23,500 --> 00:20:24,800 I NEED TO GET MY SEAT. 435 00:20:24,800 --> 00:20:27,733 EVEN IF IT'S BABY STEPS, WE CAN DO THIS, OKAY? 436 00:20:27,733 --> 00:20:29,100 OKAY. 437 00:20:29,100 --> 00:20:30,367 THERE'S A BAR RIGHT THERE. 438 00:20:30,367 --> 00:20:31,500 [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] 439 00:20:31,500 --> 00:20:33,567 OH, GOD. 440 00:20:33,567 --> 00:20:35,467 WANT TO TAKE A BREATH? 441 00:20:35,467 --> 00:20:37,367 -YOU'RE ALMOST THERE. -I'M ALMOST THERE. 442 00:20:37,367 --> 00:20:38,833 ** 443 00:20:38,833 --> 00:20:41,433 OH GOD, PLEASE DON'T... 444 00:20:41,433 --> 00:20:43,167 OH, JESUS, HELP ME. 445 00:20:43,167 --> 00:20:45,267 [ PANTING ] 446 00:20:45,267 --> 00:20:47,900 OH, GOD. OKAY. 447 00:20:47,900 --> 00:20:49,333 ARE YOU READY TO TURN A LITTLE BIT? 448 00:20:49,333 --> 00:20:50,333 YEAH. 449 00:20:50,333 --> 00:20:52,333 OH GOD, IT HURTS. 450 00:20:52,333 --> 00:20:53,533 OH, MY GOD! 451 00:20:53,533 --> 00:20:55,467 IT HURTS SO BAD. 452 00:20:55,467 --> 00:20:57,167 OH! 453 00:20:57,167 --> 00:20:58,567 [ GROANS ] 454 00:20:58,567 --> 00:21:01,533 IT ALL JUST HURTS. 455 00:21:01,533 --> 00:21:02,933 THIS IS A NO-GO. 456 00:21:02,933 --> 00:21:04,467 I'M GOING HOME. 457 00:21:04,467 --> 00:21:06,433 I'M GOING HOME. I CAN'T DO THIS. 458 00:21:06,433 --> 00:21:08,467 I'M IN SO MUCH PAIN. 459 00:21:08,467 --> 00:21:11,933 [ SOBBING ] 460 00:21:11,933 --> 00:21:13,433 OH, GOD. 461 00:21:13,433 --> 00:21:18,333 ** 462 00:21:18,333 --> 00:21:20,200 CAN I SIT NOW? -YEAH. 463 00:21:20,200 --> 00:21:22,900 [ SIGHS DEEPLY ] 464 00:21:22,900 --> 00:21:25,400 -OKAY, IS THAT GOOD? -I HAVE TO GET OFF THIS PLANE. 465 00:21:25,400 --> 00:21:28,767 OH, HELP ME, JESUS. OKAY, ONE, TWO, THREE. 466 00:21:28,767 --> 00:21:30,967 OH, GOD. -ARE YOU OKAY? 467 00:21:30,967 --> 00:21:32,933 Janine: I SCRAPED MY KNEE PRETTY BAD. 468 00:21:32,933 --> 00:21:42,100 ** 469 00:21:42,100 --> 00:21:51,233 ** 470 00:21:51,233 --> 00:21:52,867 I DID THE BEST THAT I COULD DO. 471 00:21:52,867 --> 00:21:55,367 IT JUST WASN'T ENOUGH. 472 00:21:55,367 --> 00:21:57,567 ** 473 00:21:57,567 --> 00:21:58,933 MY BODY JUST IS DONE. 474 00:21:58,933 --> 00:22:02,800 IT JUST CAN'T DO ANY MORE. 475 00:22:02,800 --> 00:22:06,900 AND I'M JUST IN SO MUCH PAIN RIGHT NOW. 476 00:22:06,900 --> 00:22:10,900 IT FEELS LIKE MY BODY IS STARTING TO SHUT DOWN. 477 00:22:10,900 --> 00:22:13,733 AND I'M TERRIFIED THIS IS GONNA BE IT FOR ME. 478 00:22:13,733 --> 00:22:17,733 ** 479 00:22:20,967 --> 00:22:28,467 ** 480 00:22:28,467 --> 00:22:36,067 ** 481 00:22:36,067 --> 00:22:44,367 ** 482 00:22:44,367 --> 00:22:46,500 Janine: THAT WHOLE EXPERIENCE OF TRYING TO GET ON THE PLANE 483 00:22:46,500 --> 00:22:48,400 AND EVERYTHING THAT HAPPENED 484 00:22:48,400 --> 00:22:51,267 WAS PRETTY MUCH MY WORST FEAR COME TO LIFE. 485 00:22:51,267 --> 00:22:53,067 ** 486 00:22:53,067 --> 00:22:54,900 AND THAT WAS ONE OF THE MOST PAINFUL 487 00:22:54,900 --> 00:22:57,967 AND HUMILIATING EXPERIENCES I'VE EVER HAD. 488 00:22:57,967 --> 00:22:59,900 I KNEW IT WAS GONNA BE HARD, 489 00:22:59,900 --> 00:23:02,567 BUT I DIDN'T KNOW IT WAS GONNA BE THAT HARD. 490 00:23:03,933 --> 00:23:06,233 I'M JUST DISAPPOINTED IN MYSELF 491 00:23:06,233 --> 00:23:08,433 THAT I LET MY BODY GET SO BAD 492 00:23:08,433 --> 00:23:12,067 I COULDN'T EVEN GO GET THE HELP I NEED. 493 00:23:12,067 --> 00:23:14,600 IT'S JUST... IT'S A REAL WAKE-UP CALL 494 00:23:14,600 --> 00:23:17,333 THAT I NEED TO JUST BE REALLY FOCUSED ON MY HEALTH. 495 00:23:17,333 --> 00:23:18,500 ** 496 00:23:18,500 --> 00:23:21,233 BUT I'M SCARED I'M JUST OUT OF OPTIONS. 497 00:23:21,233 --> 00:23:24,400 BECAUSE I DON'T SEE HOW MEETING DR. NOW IS 498 00:23:24,400 --> 00:23:26,700 GONNA HELP AT THIS POINT. 499 00:23:26,700 --> 00:23:29,533 I CAN'T GET ON A PLANE. 500 00:23:29,533 --> 00:23:31,800 AND AS DEPRESSED AS I AM ABOUT THAT, 501 00:23:31,800 --> 00:23:34,167 I DON'T KNOW WHAT ELSE I CAN DO ABOUT IT. 502 00:23:34,167 --> 00:23:35,800 ** 503 00:23:35,800 --> 00:23:37,167 OH, MY DONE. 504 00:23:43,233 --> 00:23:46,067 I DON'T THINK THERE'S MUCH HOPE FOR ME AT THIS POINT. 505 00:23:46,067 --> 00:23:52,067 ** 506 00:23:52,067 --> 00:23:58,067 ** 507 00:23:58,067 --> 00:24:01,200 LET'S GO THIS WAY. 508 00:24:01,200 --> 00:24:03,333 IT TOOK ME A LITTLE WHILE TO GET OVER THE INCIDENT 509 00:24:03,333 --> 00:24:04,900 THAT HAPPENED ON THE PLANE. 510 00:24:04,900 --> 00:24:06,833 ** 511 00:24:06,833 --> 00:24:08,333 I JUST STARTED HAVING A PANIC ATTACK 512 00:24:08,333 --> 00:24:11,067 BECAUSE I JUST COULDN'T MAKE MY BODY MOVE ANY FURTHER. 513 00:24:11,067 --> 00:24:16,600 ** 514 00:24:16,600 --> 00:24:18,467 NONE FOR YOU. 515 00:24:18,467 --> 00:24:21,533 ** 516 00:24:21,533 --> 00:24:24,833 AND THE HARDER I TRIED, THE WORSE IT GOT. 517 00:24:24,833 --> 00:24:28,100 SO I WAS WORRIED THAT I HAD PUSHED MY BODY TOO FAR 518 00:24:28,100 --> 00:24:31,300 TRYING TO GET ON THAT PLANE. 519 00:24:31,300 --> 00:24:33,433 I MEAN, I'VE NEVER BEEN IN SO MUCH PAIN 520 00:24:33,433 --> 00:24:36,067 IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. 521 00:24:36,067 --> 00:24:38,100 IT WAS PHYSICALLY VERY DEMANDING, 522 00:24:38,100 --> 00:24:40,067 EMOTIONALLY VERY DEMANDING. 523 00:24:40,067 --> 00:24:42,200 MMM-MMM-MMM. 524 00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:44,667 OOH, THAT'S GOOD STUFF. 525 00:24:44,667 --> 00:24:48,567 [ Voice breaking ] I'VE NEVER EXPERIENCED ANYTHING LIKE THAT. 526 00:24:48,567 --> 00:24:51,467 I NEVER WANT TO EXPERIENCE ANYTHING LIKE THAT AGAIN. 527 00:24:51,467 --> 00:24:52,767 EVER. 528 00:24:52,767 --> 00:25:00,600 ** 529 00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:04,567 SO I'VE BEEN RESEARCHING AND TRYING TO FIND OTHER OPTIONS 530 00:25:04,567 --> 00:25:07,567 SINCE GOING TO HOUSTON IS OUT OF THE QUESTION. 531 00:25:08,600 --> 00:25:10,067 BUT I HAVEN'T FOUND ANYTHING 532 00:25:10,067 --> 00:25:11,733 THAT I THINK WILL WORK FOR ME YET. 533 00:25:11,733 --> 00:25:14,467 ** 534 00:25:14,467 --> 00:25:17,900 I KNOW I'M STILL ON A TICKING CLOCK 535 00:25:17,900 --> 00:25:20,367 AND THAT EVERY DAY THAT PASSES, 536 00:25:20,367 --> 00:25:24,567 IT GETS HARDER AND HARDER FOR ME TO DO ANYTHING FOR MYSELF. 537 00:25:24,567 --> 00:25:28,067 ** 538 00:25:28,067 --> 00:25:30,067 EVER WANTED TO KNOW HOW A FAT WOMAN WIPES HER ASS? 539 00:25:30,067 --> 00:25:33,067 THIS IS HOW. 540 00:25:33,067 --> 00:25:35,467 SO IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE I NO LONGER 541 00:25:35,467 --> 00:25:37,633 AM GOING TO BE ABLE TO EVEN GET UP. 542 00:25:37,633 --> 00:25:43,467 ** 543 00:25:43,467 --> 00:25:46,633 BIG BUTT'S COMING -- YOU GOT TO GO. 544 00:25:46,633 --> 00:25:48,067 AND AFTER THAT, 545 00:25:48,067 --> 00:25:50,367 I'M JUST GONNA BE TRAPPED HERE ALONE, 546 00:25:50,367 --> 00:25:52,300 JUST WAITING TO DIE. 547 00:25:52,300 --> 00:25:53,633 ALL RIGHT. 548 00:25:53,633 --> 00:25:58,067 ** 549 00:25:58,067 --> 00:26:02,700 SO I KNOW I HAVE TO FIGURE SOMETHING OUT. 550 00:26:02,700 --> 00:26:05,867 BECAUSE I CAN FEEL MY BODY GETTING WORSE, 551 00:26:05,867 --> 00:26:09,433 AND I DON'T THINK I'LL BE ABLE TO SURVIVE MUCH LONGER. 552 00:26:09,433 --> 00:26:13,333 ** 553 00:26:13,333 --> 00:26:14,533 [ SIGHS ] 554 00:26:16,400 --> 00:26:23,333 ** 555 00:26:23,333 --> 00:26:30,233 ** 556 00:26:30,233 --> 00:26:37,167 ** 557 00:26:37,167 --> 00:26:40,300 DR. NOW'S OFFICE HAS TRIED TO RESCHEDULE WITH ME. 558 00:26:42,433 --> 00:26:44,933 BUT I KNOW I CAN'T MAKE THE TRIP, 559 00:26:44,933 --> 00:26:48,867 SO I'VE AGREED TO DO A VIDEO CALL WITH HIM. 560 00:26:48,867 --> 00:26:50,233 I WANT TO HEAR WHAT HE HAD TO SAY 561 00:26:50,233 --> 00:26:53,767 AND SEE IF WE CAN WORK TOGETHER. 562 00:26:53,767 --> 00:26:55,700 ** 563 00:26:55,700 --> 00:26:58,200 I KNOW I STILL NEED HELP, 564 00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:00,233 AND SINCE I CAN'T MAKE IT TO HOUSTON, 565 00:27:00,233 --> 00:27:01,500 I'VE BEEN THINKING, 566 00:27:01,500 --> 00:27:03,433 MAYBE HE KNOWS SOMEONE HERE THAT COULD HELP ME, 567 00:27:03,433 --> 00:27:05,067 OR HE COULD TELL ME WHAT I NEED TO DO 568 00:27:05,067 --> 00:27:07,833 TO START LOSING WEIGHT. 569 00:27:07,833 --> 00:27:09,467 JUST AS LONG AS IT DOESN'T INVOLVE ME 570 00:27:09,467 --> 00:27:12,800 TRYING TO GET ON A PLANE AGAIN. 571 00:27:12,800 --> 00:27:14,933 THERE IS JUST NO WAY ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH 572 00:27:14,933 --> 00:27:16,700 I'M PUTTING MYSELF THROUGH THAT AGAIN, 573 00:27:16,700 --> 00:27:19,433 BECAUSE I KNOW I WON'T SURVIVE IT A SECOND TIME. 574 00:27:19,433 --> 00:27:21,567 ** 575 00:27:21,567 --> 00:27:24,600 SO IF DR. NOW SO MUCH AS MENTIONS THE IDEA, 576 00:27:24,600 --> 00:27:27,367 THE CALL WILL BE OVER. 577 00:27:27,367 --> 00:27:30,133 SO THE BALL'S IN HIS COURT. 578 00:27:30,133 --> 00:27:31,967 HE CAN EITHER HELP ME, 579 00:27:31,967 --> 00:27:33,867 OR LET ME DIE. 580 00:27:33,867 --> 00:27:36,300 [ Ringing ] 581 00:27:40,700 --> 00:27:48,767 ** 582 00:27:48,767 --> 00:27:57,600 ** 583 00:27:57,600 --> 00:27:59,633 Janine: I KNOW THAT MY BODY HAS BEEN GETTING WORSE 584 00:27:59,633 --> 00:28:01,900 AND WORSE THESE PAST TWO MONTHS, 585 00:28:01,900 --> 00:28:04,400 SO I WANT DR. NOW TO HELP ME. 586 00:28:06,067 --> 00:28:07,167 BUT ALL I KNOW IS 587 00:28:07,167 --> 00:28:08,867 THAT I CAN'T GO TO HOUSTON, 588 00:28:08,867 --> 00:28:11,800 SO ANY OPTIONS HE PUSHES WITH THAT INVOLVED 589 00:28:11,800 --> 00:28:14,367 ARE OUT OF THE QUESTION. 590 00:28:14,367 --> 00:28:17,500 AND IF HE PUSHES THAT, THEN AS FAR AS I'M CONCERNED, 591 00:28:17,500 --> 00:28:21,500 THERE'S NOTHING MORE TO DISCUSS, AND THE CONVERSATION IS OVER. 592 00:28:21,500 --> 00:28:25,333 [ Ringing ] 593 00:28:25,333 --> 00:28:28,300 Hi, Janine. I'm Dr. Nowzaradan. 594 00:28:28,300 --> 00:28:29,567 How you doing today? 595 00:28:29,567 --> 00:28:32,567 I'M DOING OKAY. NICE TO FINALLY MEET YOU. 596 00:28:32,567 --> 00:28:35,200 It is nice to finally meet you, too. 597 00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:36,700 First thing's first, 598 00:28:36,700 --> 00:28:38,467 let me ask you a couple questions. 599 00:28:38,467 --> 00:28:39,500 So, what happened? 600 00:28:39,500 --> 00:28:41,867 Why did you miss your appointment? 601 00:28:41,867 --> 00:28:43,500 WELL, IT WAS ACTUALLY REALLY AWFUL. 602 00:28:43,500 --> 00:28:47,600 I TRIED TO GET ON THE PLANE, AND I JUST COULDN'T DO IT. 603 00:28:47,600 --> 00:28:49,967 I JUST STARTED HAVING A PANIC ATTACK SO BAD, 604 00:28:49,967 --> 00:28:52,433 AND EVERYTHING WAS HURTING SO BAD, I JUST... 605 00:28:52,433 --> 00:28:55,433 THEY HAD TO CALL THE PARAMEDICS AND TAKE ME OFF THE PLANE. 606 00:28:55,433 --> 00:28:59,800 SO WHAT IS HOLDING YOU BACK FROM COMING TO HOUSTON RIGHT NOW? 607 00:28:59,800 --> 00:29:02,633 WELL, I'D HAVE TO GET BACK ON THE PLANE, I GUESS. 608 00:29:02,633 --> 00:29:04,567 AND THERE'S NO WAY I CAN PHYSICALLY DO IT, 609 00:29:04,567 --> 00:29:06,267 SO IT'S JUST NOT AN OPTION. 610 00:29:06,267 --> 00:29:08,067 Okay, slow down. 611 00:29:08,067 --> 00:29:09,733 Before you tell me what you think 612 00:29:09,733 --> 00:29:11,500 your options are or aren't, 613 00:29:11,500 --> 00:29:14,233 let's take a step back and discuss a couple things 614 00:29:14,233 --> 00:29:16,267 before you draw lines in the sand. 615 00:29:16,267 --> 00:29:17,967 Can you do that for me? 616 00:29:17,967 --> 00:29:19,900 YES, OKAY. 617 00:29:19,900 --> 00:29:21,767 Okay, first thing's first. 618 00:29:21,767 --> 00:29:23,433 Let me ask you a couple questions 619 00:29:23,433 --> 00:29:25,067 to explain something to you. 620 00:29:25,067 --> 00:29:26,133 OKAY. 621 00:29:26,133 --> 00:29:28,733 Do you know how much you weigh? 622 00:29:28,733 --> 00:29:32,167 LAST TIME I WEIGHED, I THINK I WAS 629. 623 00:29:32,167 --> 00:29:34,300 And how old are you now? 624 00:29:34,300 --> 00:29:36,267 JUST TURNED 54. 625 00:29:36,267 --> 00:29:38,633 Okay, Janine, what you need to understand 626 00:29:38,633 --> 00:29:40,467 is at your age and your weight, 627 00:29:40,467 --> 00:29:44,067 your longevity is not very long, you know that? 628 00:29:44,067 --> 00:29:46,267 YES, SIR. 629 00:29:46,267 --> 00:29:49,200 I TOTALLY GET IT. 630 00:29:49,200 --> 00:29:51,267 I don't think you do completely. 631 00:29:51,267 --> 00:29:53,600 Janine, the reason I took your case 632 00:29:53,600 --> 00:29:56,200 was that someone in your situation 633 00:29:56,200 --> 00:29:58,867 will likely suffer a life-threatening event 634 00:29:58,867 --> 00:30:00,333 within a year. 635 00:30:00,333 --> 00:30:03,767 For example, you're going to suffer cardiac arrest one night 636 00:30:03,767 --> 00:30:06,000 and that will be it. 637 00:30:06,000 --> 00:30:09,400 That's your future, and it's going to happen soon. 638 00:30:09,400 --> 00:30:11,033 And if you understood that, 639 00:30:11,033 --> 00:30:14,267 you wouldn't be playing around like you are. 640 00:30:14,267 --> 00:30:15,633 UNDERSTOOD. 641 00:30:15,633 --> 00:30:18,167 So you need to come down here as soon as possible. 642 00:30:18,167 --> 00:30:21,567 When can you come? 643 00:30:21,567 --> 00:30:23,967 I'M NOT SURE. UH... 644 00:30:23,967 --> 00:30:26,533 I MEAN, I DO WANT TO DO IT -- IT'S JUST... 645 00:30:26,533 --> 00:30:29,600 TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHAT THE BEST THING IS FOR ME TO DO. 646 00:30:29,600 --> 00:30:31,167 This is very serious. 647 00:30:31,167 --> 00:30:34,633 You said it yourself -- you suffered a panic attack. 648 00:30:34,633 --> 00:30:37,467 It was your fear that held you back. 649 00:30:37,467 --> 00:30:38,467 YEAH. 650 00:30:38,467 --> 00:30:40,200 And every day that passes, 651 00:30:40,200 --> 00:30:42,767 your window to get help is shorter, 652 00:30:42,767 --> 00:30:46,433 And you'll be too far gone physically. 653 00:30:46,433 --> 00:30:48,600 The more weight you gain, the bigger you get, 654 00:30:48,600 --> 00:30:52,067 there will be more danger in travelling, too. 655 00:30:52,067 --> 00:30:55,067 So this danger is not gonna go away. 656 00:30:55,067 --> 00:30:56,067 YEAH. 657 00:30:56,067 --> 00:30:57,233 This is your last chance 658 00:30:57,233 --> 00:31:00,267 before your situation gets any worse, okay? 659 00:31:00,267 --> 00:31:03,300 So now do you think you can come to visit? 660 00:31:03,300 --> 00:31:04,633 YES, OKAY. 661 00:31:04,633 --> 00:31:06,900 Okay, you've got a long way to go. 662 00:31:06,900 --> 00:31:10,633 The sooner we start, the sooner we get you there. 663 00:31:10,633 --> 00:31:13,267 SO YOU'RE MY DOCTOR NOW, YEAH? 664 00:31:13,267 --> 00:31:14,700 100%. 665 00:31:14,700 --> 00:31:18,067 You take this leap of faith and stick to the program, 666 00:31:18,067 --> 00:31:21,233 then we will do everything we can to help you. 667 00:31:21,233 --> 00:31:22,767 OKAY. ALL RIGHT. 668 00:31:22,767 --> 00:31:25,267 IF YOU SAY I CAN DO THIS, THEN I BELIEVE YOU. 669 00:31:25,267 --> 00:31:26,933 SO I WILL DO IT. 670 00:31:26,933 --> 00:31:29,067 All right, Janine, I will send you a diet 671 00:31:29,067 --> 00:31:32,100 and I want you to start on it immediately. 672 00:31:32,100 --> 00:31:34,500 I look forward to seeing you in Houston, okay? 673 00:31:34,500 --> 00:31:36,800 THANK YOU, DR. NOWZARADAN. APPRECIATE YA. 674 00:31:36,800 --> 00:31:38,467 All right, we'll see you then. 675 00:31:38,467 --> 00:31:40,067 OKAY, HAVE A GOOD EVENING. 676 00:31:40,067 --> 00:31:41,233 BUH-BYE. 677 00:31:41,233 --> 00:31:42,367 Buh-bye. 678 00:31:42,367 --> 00:31:46,700 ** 679 00:31:46,700 --> 00:31:49,100 Janine: IT WAS REALLY HARD TO HEAR HIM SAY SOME OF THE THINGS 680 00:31:49,100 --> 00:31:52,067 THAT HE THINKS ABOUT MY HEALTH SITUATION. 681 00:31:52,067 --> 00:31:54,367 HE FEELS MY SITUATION 682 00:31:54,367 --> 00:31:55,900 IS VERY URGENT. 683 00:31:55,900 --> 00:31:58,900 THOSE ARE KINDA SCARY WORDS. 684 00:31:58,900 --> 00:32:01,067 SO AFTER HEARING DR. NOW OUT, 685 00:32:01,067 --> 00:32:04,233 I'M MORE SCARED NOW TO STAY HERE AND RISK DYING EVERY DAY 686 00:32:04,233 --> 00:32:06,700 THAN TRYING TO GO TO HOUSTON. 687 00:32:06,700 --> 00:32:11,467 BECAUSE WHAT DR. NOW IS SAYING, I FEEL IT EVERY DAY. 688 00:32:11,467 --> 00:32:14,667 SO I KNOW THAT I NEED TO GET THE WEIGHT OFF 689 00:32:14,667 --> 00:32:17,833 AND GET THE HECK OUT OF THIS CHAIR. 690 00:32:17,833 --> 00:32:20,267 BUT IT'S GONNA TAKE A LOT. 691 00:32:20,267 --> 00:32:22,833 [ Voice breaking ] I'M GONNA GET OUT OF THIS CHAIR, 692 00:32:22,833 --> 00:32:24,600 BUT I'VE GOT TO TRY -- 693 00:32:24,600 --> 00:32:28,567 I'VE GOT TO DO IT. 694 00:32:28,567 --> 00:32:31,533 SO I'M GOING TO DO EVERYTHING IN MY POWER, 695 00:32:31,533 --> 00:32:33,567 WHATEVER IT TAKES, 696 00:32:33,567 --> 00:32:36,867 SO THAT I CAN GET ON THAT PLANE. 697 00:32:36,867 --> 00:32:40,133 BECAUSE THIS IS MY LAST CHANCE. 698 00:32:40,133 --> 00:32:47,200 ** 699 00:32:47,200 --> 00:32:54,267 ** 700 00:32:54,267 --> 00:32:57,267 AFTER TALKING TO DR. NOW A COUPLE WEEKS AGO, 701 00:32:57,267 --> 00:32:59,900 I SAW HOW COMMITTED HE WAS TO HELPING ME 702 00:32:59,900 --> 00:33:03,267 AND HOW MUCH HE WANTED ME TO DO THIS. 703 00:33:03,267 --> 00:33:06,700 BUT I REALIZED, EVEN IF I'M ABLE TO GET TO HOUSTON, 704 00:33:06,700 --> 00:33:09,067 THEN THERE'S NO WAY I CAN MAKE THE TRIP BACK TO SEATTLE 705 00:33:09,067 --> 00:33:12,400 AND THEN HAVE TO DO IT ALL OVER AGAIN. 706 00:33:12,400 --> 00:33:14,067 -HI. -HI! 707 00:33:14,067 --> 00:33:16,867 SO, I THINK THE GUYS PRETTY MUCH HAVE EVERYTHING 708 00:33:16,867 --> 00:33:19,067 READY TO ROLL FOR YOU OUT THERE. 709 00:33:19,067 --> 00:33:20,400 YOU WANT TO THROW A COUPLE BOXES MY WAY, 710 00:33:20,400 --> 00:33:22,400 AND THEN I'LL WORK ON IN HERE. 711 00:33:22,400 --> 00:33:23,400 ALL RIGHT, WE'LL GET STARTED NOW. 712 00:33:23,400 --> 00:33:25,933 OKAY, THANKS! 713 00:33:25,933 --> 00:33:27,600 SO I TOLD DR. NOW I NEED 714 00:33:27,600 --> 00:33:28,967 A LITTLE MORE TIME TO GET DOWN THERE 715 00:33:28,967 --> 00:33:32,067 BECAUSE I'M GOING TO MAKE IT PERMANENT. 716 00:33:32,067 --> 00:33:34,667 HE TOLD ME THAT HE UNDERSTOOD AND THAT THAT WAS FINE, 717 00:33:34,667 --> 00:33:36,133 AS LONG AS I DIDN'T TAKE TOO LONG 718 00:33:36,133 --> 00:33:37,900 AND I STARTED TO GET MY EATING UNDER CONTROL 719 00:33:37,900 --> 00:33:41,433 WITH THE DIET HE SENT ME. 720 00:33:41,433 --> 00:33:44,633 SO TODAY, I'M PACKING UP TO MOVE TO HOUSTON, 721 00:33:44,633 --> 00:33:45,933 AND THEN TONIGHT, 722 00:33:45,933 --> 00:33:48,367 I'M HEADED TO THE AIRPORT TO TRY AGAIN. 723 00:33:48,367 --> 00:33:50,400 ** 724 00:33:50,400 --> 00:33:52,467 KNOWING THAT THIS IS A ONE-WAY TRIP FOR ME 725 00:33:52,467 --> 00:33:55,733 IS GONNA KEEP ME MOTIVATED TO DO THIS. 726 00:33:55,733 --> 00:33:59,067 BECAUSE IF I FAIL, I HAVE NOTHING TO COME BACK TO. 727 00:33:59,067 --> 00:34:01,467 MY STUFF WILL BE ON THE WAY HOUSTON. 728 00:34:01,467 --> 00:34:02,900 SO I EITHER DO THIS, 729 00:34:02,900 --> 00:34:06,233 OR I HAVE NO PLACE TO GO. 730 00:34:06,233 --> 00:34:08,067 BUT THIS WHOLE PROCESS HAS BEEN STRESSFUL 731 00:34:08,067 --> 00:34:10,900 FOR A LOT OF REASONS. 732 00:34:10,900 --> 00:34:13,467 WHAT DO I NEED TO TAKE? WHAT DO I LEAVE BEHIND? 733 00:34:13,467 --> 00:34:16,633 AND JUST TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHAT LIFE IS GONNA BE LIKE 734 00:34:16,633 --> 00:34:20,433 IN A TOTALLY DIFFERENT STATE. 735 00:34:20,433 --> 00:34:21,700 SO THERE ARE MOMENTS WHERE 736 00:34:21,700 --> 00:34:24,600 I, HONESTLY, DON'T KNOW IF I'M GONNA MAKE IT, 737 00:34:24,600 --> 00:34:28,600 BUT I CAN'T ALLOW MY EMOTIONS TO GET THE BEST OF ME AGAIN. 738 00:34:28,600 --> 00:34:30,500 I'VE HAVE TO STAY IN CONTROL, 739 00:34:30,500 --> 00:34:34,300 BECAUSE I DON'T THINK I'LL GET A THIRD CHANCE AFTER THIS. 740 00:34:34,300 --> 00:34:36,800 SO I'M TAKING A HUGE LEAP OF FAITH 741 00:34:36,800 --> 00:34:38,633 THAT THIS IS ALL GONNA WORK OUT. 742 00:34:38,633 --> 00:34:46,667 ** 743 00:34:46,667 --> 00:34:49,067 I'M NOWHERE NEAR READY TO DO THIS... 744 00:34:49,067 --> 00:34:51,633 ** 745 00:34:51,633 --> 00:34:53,067 ...AND THERE'S A BIG PART OF ME 746 00:34:53,067 --> 00:34:55,200 THAT'S FREAKING OUT RIGHT NOW. 747 00:34:55,200 --> 00:34:57,333 ** 748 00:34:57,333 --> 00:35:00,067 LIKE, "WHAT AM I DOING? 749 00:35:00,067 --> 00:35:02,333 THIS IS INSANE. 750 00:35:02,333 --> 00:35:05,067 I'VE ALREADY TRIED THIS AND FAILED." 751 00:35:05,067 --> 00:35:07,333 ** 752 00:35:07,333 --> 00:35:10,433 I'M JUST HOPING IT'S NOT GONNA BE CATASTROPHIC. 753 00:35:10,433 --> 00:35:12,667 BECAUSE JONATHAN CAN'T COME WITH ME. 754 00:35:12,667 --> 00:35:16,367 AND WHEN I GET TO THE AIRPORT, I'M COMPLETELY ON MY OWN. 755 00:35:16,367 --> 00:35:18,433 SO I'M JUST TRYING TO STAY 756 00:35:18,433 --> 00:35:21,300 CALM AND IN CONTROL. 757 00:35:21,300 --> 00:35:23,667 BUT I HAVE A FRIEND DRIVING ME, 758 00:35:23,667 --> 00:35:25,467 SO I'M GRATEFUL TO AT LEAST HAVE THAT HELP. 759 00:35:25,467 --> 00:35:27,900 OH, GOD. HELP ME, JESUS. 760 00:35:27,900 --> 00:35:31,467 'CAUSE IF I LOSE IT AGAIN AND HAVE ANOTHER PANIC ATTACK, 761 00:35:31,467 --> 00:35:32,900 I COULD PUT MY BODY IN A POSITION 762 00:35:32,900 --> 00:35:36,200 WHERE IT'S OVEREXTENDING PHYSICALLY. 763 00:35:36,200 --> 00:35:37,867 AND AT THAT POINT, 764 00:35:37,867 --> 00:35:41,067 IT'S NOT JUST MY LAST CHANCE I'M GOING TO LOSE... 765 00:35:41,067 --> 00:35:42,667 IT COULD BE MY LIFE. 766 00:35:42,667 --> 00:35:44,500 ** 767 00:35:48,200 --> 00:35:56,700 ** 768 00:35:56,700 --> 00:36:05,567 ** 769 00:36:05,567 --> 00:36:06,933 Janine: IT WAS SUCH AN EPIC FAIL 770 00:36:06,933 --> 00:36:09,333 THE LAST TIME I TRIED TO GET TO HOUSTON. 771 00:36:09,333 --> 00:36:13,767 ** 772 00:36:13,767 --> 00:36:16,067 AND TODAY, I'M EITHER GOING TO DO THIS 773 00:36:16,067 --> 00:36:18,567 AND GRAB AHOLD OF THE ONLY HOPE I HAVE LEFT, 774 00:36:18,567 --> 00:36:21,567 OR I'M GONNA FAIL AGAIN, AND THEN I'M DONE. 775 00:36:21,567 --> 00:36:23,767 SO I CAN'T LET MY EMOTIONS, 776 00:36:23,767 --> 00:36:26,100 OR ANY PAIN, OVERWHELM ME. 777 00:36:26,100 --> 00:36:29,533 ** 778 00:36:29,533 --> 00:36:30,800 OKAY, I CAN DO THIS. 779 00:36:30,800 --> 00:36:32,533 I CAN HANDLE LOTS OF PEOPLE. 780 00:36:34,000 --> 00:36:40,074 781 00:36:42,067 --> 00:36:43,967 MOVE ON -- LET'S MOVE ON, PLEASE. 782 00:36:45,567 --> 00:36:47,267 IS THIS CHECKPOINT FIVE? 783 00:36:47,267 --> 00:36:49,233 CHECKPOINT FIVE IS RIGHT DOWN THAT WAY. 784 00:36:49,233 --> 00:36:56,067 ** 785 00:36:56,067 --> 00:36:57,900 THE ONE RAY OF HOPE IN ALL THIS 786 00:36:57,900 --> 00:37:00,767 IS THAT I MANAGED TO CONVINCE MY SISTER-IN-LAW, SUSAN, 787 00:37:00,767 --> 00:37:02,933 TO FLY FROM DENVER AND MEET ME IN HOUSTON 788 00:37:02,933 --> 00:37:06,067 TO, AT LEAST, HELP ME GET MOVED IN. 789 00:37:06,067 --> 00:37:09,967 BECAUSE THERE'S NO WAY I CAN GET SET UP BY MYSELF, 790 00:37:09,967 --> 00:37:14,067 SO I'M REALLY THANKFUL SHE'S DOING THIS FOR ME. 791 00:37:14,067 --> 00:37:16,367 I JUST HAVE TO GET TO HOUSTON. 792 00:37:16,367 --> 00:37:20,667 ** 793 00:37:20,667 --> 00:37:23,533 OOH-WEE. 794 00:37:23,533 --> 00:37:25,700 I CAN HANDLE THIS. 795 00:37:25,700 --> 00:37:27,933 EVERYTHING'S FINE. 796 00:37:27,933 --> 00:37:30,967 OKAY... 797 00:37:30,967 --> 00:37:33,400 I'M JUST SCARED ABOUT TRANSFERRING TO THAT THING. 798 00:37:33,400 --> 00:37:35,333 YEAH. 799 00:37:35,333 --> 00:37:37,200 OKAY. 800 00:37:37,200 --> 00:37:38,400 OH, GOD. 801 00:37:38,400 --> 00:37:39,433 [ INHALES SHARPLY ] 802 00:37:43,367 --> 00:37:44,800 OOH. 803 00:37:44,800 --> 00:37:45,867 CAN I HELP TOO, IF THAT'LL HELP A LITTLE BIT. 804 00:37:45,867 --> 00:37:46,900 YEAH. 805 00:37:46,900 --> 00:37:48,433 [ GROANS ] 806 00:37:48,433 --> 00:37:49,767 OH, MY GOODNESS. 807 00:37:49,767 --> 00:37:50,767 HOLD ON. 808 00:37:50,767 --> 00:37:53,600 SORRY. THERE WE GO. -I'M SORRY. 809 00:37:53,600 --> 00:37:54,833 OKAY. 810 00:37:54,833 --> 00:37:56,300 OH, [BLEEP]. 811 00:37:56,300 --> 00:37:57,500 OKAY. SORRY. 812 00:37:57,500 --> 00:37:59,467 -YOU ALL RIGHT? -YOU OKAY? 813 00:37:59,467 --> 00:38:00,733 Janine: ALL RIGHT. 814 00:38:06,900 --> 00:38:07,867 [ SCREAMS ] 815 00:38:07,867 --> 00:38:09,300 IT'S ALL RIGHT. WE'VE GOT YOU. 816 00:38:09,300 --> 00:38:10,300 NO, WE'VE GOT YOU. 817 00:38:10,300 --> 00:38:11,700 I KNOW, IT'S JUST... 818 00:38:11,700 --> 00:38:14,067 -WE'VE GOT YOU. -I CAN'T DO THIS! 819 00:38:15,667 --> 00:38:19,167 [ WHEEZING ] 820 00:38:19,167 --> 00:38:20,300 OH, MY GOD. 821 00:38:20,300 --> 00:38:22,200 JUST SLOWLY. 822 00:38:22,200 --> 00:38:23,167 WATCH YOUR ARM ON THAT SIDE. 823 00:38:23,167 --> 00:38:24,333 YEAH. 824 00:38:24,333 --> 00:38:26,067 AND ON THAT SIDE. 825 00:38:26,067 --> 00:38:27,567 OKAY. 826 00:38:27,567 --> 00:38:30,133 ALL RIGHT, HERE WE GO. 827 00:38:30,133 --> 00:38:31,533 OH, GOD. YOU GOT IT. 828 00:38:31,533 --> 00:38:34,500 OKAY. 829 00:38:34,500 --> 00:38:35,567 I JUST WANT TO GET IN THAT SEAT. 830 00:38:35,567 --> 00:38:37,100 WE WANT TO BE CAREFUL. 831 00:38:37,100 --> 00:38:38,467 YEAH, WE DO. 832 00:38:38,467 --> 00:38:39,467 OKAY. 833 00:38:39,467 --> 00:38:41,500 OKAY, GO IN THAT WAY. 834 00:38:41,500 --> 00:38:42,700 THERE WE GO. 835 00:38:42,700 --> 00:38:43,900 OH, GOD. YOU DID GOOD. 836 00:38:43,900 --> 00:38:45,300 I'M IN. 837 00:38:48,400 --> 00:38:49,733 I CAN'T. 838 00:38:49,733 --> 00:38:51,367 ** 839 00:38:51,367 --> 00:38:52,733 -WE'LL DO IT TOGETHER. -WE GOT YOU. 840 00:38:52,733 --> 00:38:56,433 -ONE, TWO, THREE. -THERE WE GO. 841 00:38:56,433 --> 00:38:57,600 Man: ALL RIGHT, ARE WE GOOD? 842 00:38:57,600 --> 00:39:00,833 THIS IS SO UNCOMFORTABLE. I'M NOT GONNA MAKE THIS. 843 00:39:00,833 --> 00:39:02,067 SERIOUSLY. 844 00:39:02,067 --> 00:39:05,367 [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] 845 00:39:05,367 --> 00:39:07,667 Woman: GENERAL BOARDING. 846 00:39:07,667 --> 00:39:09,967 THANK YOU. YOU HAVE A GOOD FLIGHT. 847 00:39:09,967 --> 00:39:11,967 OH, THANK GOD. 848 00:39:11,967 --> 00:39:14,067 I CAN HANDLE THIS FROM HERE... 849 00:39:14,067 --> 00:39:15,400 I HOPE. 850 00:39:15,400 --> 00:39:23,067 ** 851 00:39:23,067 --> 00:39:30,567 ** 852 00:39:30,567 --> 00:39:32,533 [ SOBBING ] 853 00:39:33,933 --> 00:39:36,867 THIS HURTS SO BAD. 854 00:39:36,867 --> 00:39:39,200 I DON'T KNOW IF I'M GONNA BE ABLE TO MAKE IT. 855 00:39:39,200 --> 00:39:43,400 ** 856 00:39:43,400 --> 00:39:45,500 I'M IN SO MUCH PAIN. 857 00:39:45,500 --> 00:39:54,067 ** 858 00:39:54,067 --> 00:39:56,833 WE'RE GONNA START DESCENDING SOON. 859 00:39:56,833 --> 00:39:59,500 I CAN'T DO IT. 860 00:39:59,500 --> 00:40:02,467 I HAVE ONE STOP IN DALLAS BEFORE THEY GO ON TO HOUSTON, 861 00:40:02,467 --> 00:40:04,333 AND I HAVE TO GET OFF HERE. 862 00:40:06,800 --> 00:40:07,900 IT'S SO TIGHT. 863 00:40:07,900 --> 00:40:11,967 ** 864 00:40:11,967 --> 00:40:16,000 ** 865 00:40:16,000 --> 00:40:18,033 ...FOR RENTAL. 866 00:40:21,867 --> 00:40:23,500 HEY, JUST BREATHE. 867 00:40:23,500 --> 00:40:25,467 I NEED TO GO TO A HOSPITAL. 868 00:40:30,167 --> 00:40:31,833 [ Voice breaking ] I APPRECIATE YA. 869 00:40:34,200 --> 00:40:36,900 ** 870 00:40:36,900 --> 00:40:37,933 OH GOD, THAT HURTS. 871 00:40:37,933 --> 00:40:39,533 OH, AND I'M FALLING OFF THE SEAT. 872 00:40:45,867 --> 00:40:46,833 WE GOT YOU. WE GOT YOU. 873 00:40:46,833 --> 00:40:48,167 I SWEAR TO GOD, I'M FALLING. 874 00:40:48,167 --> 00:40:49,400 -WE'RE NOT GONNA LET YOU GO. I'M FALLING. 875 00:40:49,400 --> 00:40:50,500 -WE GOT YOU. -WE'RE NOT GONNA LET YOU GO. 876 00:40:50,500 --> 00:40:52,300 -JANINE, WE GOT YOU. -I'M IN PAIN. 877 00:40:52,300 --> 00:40:54,933 -LET ME KNOW IF IT HURTS. -...TWO, THREE. 878 00:40:54,933 --> 00:40:56,533 [ ALL STRAINING ] 879 00:40:58,600 --> 00:41:01,533 ONE, TWO, THREE. 880 00:41:05,600 --> 00:41:07,533 Janine: I JUST CAN'T. 881 00:41:07,533 --> 00:41:10,300 TRY IT SIDEWAYS. 882 00:41:10,300 --> 00:41:12,200 ONE, TWO, THREE, PUSH. 883 00:41:12,200 --> 00:41:14,333 -HOLD ON, HOLD ON, HOLD ON. -OW, OW, OW. 884 00:41:14,333 --> 00:41:16,400 Man: THERE IT GOES. THERE IT GOES. 885 00:41:16,400 --> 00:41:18,367 ** 886 00:41:18,367 --> 00:41:20,700 ONE, TWO, THREE. 887 00:41:20,700 --> 00:41:22,533 Man #2: COME ON, COME ON, COME ON, COME ON. 888 00:41:22,533 --> 00:41:25,800 [ INDISTINCT CHATTER ] 889 00:41:25,800 --> 00:41:28,733 -THERE WE GO. -WE'RE ON THERE. 890 00:41:28,733 --> 00:41:30,933 ** 891 00:41:30,933 --> 00:41:35,233 [ INDISTINCT CHATTER ] 892 00:41:35,233 --> 00:41:40,433 ** 893 00:41:40,433 --> 00:41:43,200 I'M SO HUMILIATED. 894 00:41:43,200 --> 00:41:45,233 [ Voice breaking ] I FEEL LIKE A FAILURE AGAIN. 895 00:41:45,233 --> 00:41:46,400 E.M.T.: LET'S SEE WHEN WE GET OUT THERE. 896 00:41:46,400 --> 00:41:47,933 Y'ALL THINK WE CAN GET HER IN THE BACK? 897 00:41:51,733 --> 00:41:54,800 AND I'M SCARED OUT OF MY MIND RIGHT NOW. 898 00:41:54,800 --> 00:41:56,967 BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO 899 00:41:56,967 --> 00:41:58,900 OR WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN TO ME. 900 00:41:58,900 --> 00:42:01,067 ** 901 00:42:01,067 --> 00:42:03,067 I'M DISAPPOINTED WITH MYSELF. 902 00:42:05,067 --> 00:42:06,767 I JUST COULDN'T HANDLE THE PAIN. 903 00:42:09,067 --> 00:42:11,067 I'M SO SORRY. I WANTED TO DO IT. 904 00:42:11,067 --> 00:42:12,833 I WANTED TO DO IT SO BAD. 905 00:42:12,833 --> 00:42:15,100 ** 906 00:42:15,100 --> 00:42:16,300 I JUST COULDN'T. 907 00:42:16,300 --> 00:42:17,467 AND NOW I'VE PROBABLY LOST 908 00:42:17,467 --> 00:42:19,800 THE ONLY CHANCE I HAD TO GET HELP. 909 00:42:19,800 --> 00:42:21,600 ** 910 00:42:25,233 --> 00:42:32,900 ** 911 00:42:32,900 --> 00:42:41,467 ** 912 00:42:41,467 --> 00:42:42,967 Janine: IT'S BEEN REALLY SCARY 913 00:42:42,967 --> 00:42:45,400 BECAUSE I HAVE NO ONE HERE IN DALLAS 914 00:42:45,400 --> 00:42:47,067 TO HELP ME. 915 00:42:47,067 --> 00:42:51,067 BUT I CALLED MY SISTER-IN-LAW WHO WAS FLYING TO HOUSTON, 916 00:42:51,067 --> 00:42:53,067 AND SHE WAS ABLE TO GET ON ANOTHER FLIGHT 917 00:42:53,067 --> 00:42:57,533 TO COME UP HERE EARLY THIS MORNING TO BE WITH ME. 918 00:42:57,533 --> 00:43:00,833 AND SHE ALSO HAS BEEN TRYING TO SEE WHAT OPTIONS I HAVE 919 00:43:00,833 --> 00:43:04,867 AND WHAT NEEDS TO HAPPEN TO GET ME TO HOUSTON. 920 00:43:04,867 --> 00:43:08,233 AND I'M SO THANKFUL FOR HER DOING THAT. 921 00:43:08,233 --> 00:43:10,200 JUST KNOWING I HAVE SOMEONE HERE WITH ME 922 00:43:10,200 --> 00:43:12,267 IS A NICE COMFORT TO ME RIGHT NOW. 923 00:43:12,267 --> 00:43:14,767 [ KNOCKS ON DOOR ] 924 00:43:14,767 --> 00:43:17,567 COME IN. 925 00:43:17,567 --> 00:43:18,833 HI, JAN! 926 00:43:18,833 --> 00:43:20,467 HEY, SUSAN! 927 00:43:20,467 --> 00:43:21,667 HOW ARE YOU? 928 00:43:25,133 --> 00:43:27,133 THANK YOU FOR COMING. 929 00:43:27,133 --> 00:43:29,533 IT'S GREAT TO SEE YOU. 930 00:43:29,533 --> 00:43:30,533 GOOD TO SEE YOU! 931 00:43:30,533 --> 00:43:31,967 YOU FEELING OKAY? 932 00:43:31,967 --> 00:43:33,233 I'M WAY BETTER. THANK YOU. 933 00:43:33,233 --> 00:43:34,333 GOOD. 934 00:43:39,833 --> 00:43:41,933 MY LEG JUST SWELLED UP SO MUCH ON THE PLANE 935 00:43:41,933 --> 00:43:43,667 THAT IT JUST KEPT 936 00:43:43,667 --> 00:43:45,200 KINDA PUSHING ME OFF THE SEAT, 937 00:43:45,200 --> 00:43:47,333 AND THEN I JUST -- 938 00:43:47,333 --> 00:43:49,133 I DON'T KNOW, I JUST LOST MY ENERGY. 939 00:43:49,133 --> 00:43:52,267 I DON'T THINK I HAD ENOUGH TO EAT YESTERDAY, 940 00:43:52,267 --> 00:43:54,300 AND SO I JUST... 941 00:43:54,300 --> 00:43:58,067 IT WAS REALLY SCARY, AND I JUST... 942 00:43:58,067 --> 00:44:00,400 I FELT BECAUSE MY FEET WERE SO BIG, I JUST... 943 00:44:00,400 --> 00:44:03,600 JUST NOT ENOUGH ROOM. 944 00:44:03,600 --> 00:44:05,867 WELL, THEY ARRANGED A TRANSPORT 945 00:44:05,867 --> 00:44:09,400 TO TAKE US FROM HERE TO HOUSTON. 946 00:44:12,533 --> 00:44:15,667 OKAY. 947 00:44:15,667 --> 00:44:18,267 Janine: I COULDN'T DO THIS ALONE, 948 00:44:18,267 --> 00:44:22,700 AND I'M GRATEFUL BECAUSE I, AT LEAST, HAVE THIS OPTION. 949 00:44:22,700 --> 00:44:26,333 BUT I JUST KNOW IT'S GONNA BE A REALLY LONG DRIVE. 950 00:44:26,333 --> 00:44:28,367 ** 951 00:44:32,067 --> 00:44:37,700 ** 952 00:44:37,700 --> 00:44:40,100 [ BEEPING ] 953 00:44:43,467 --> 00:44:48,600 Janine: I KNOW THIS IS GONNA BE PAINFUL AND DIFFICULT FOR ME, 954 00:44:48,600 --> 00:44:52,067 JUST, HOPEFULLY, NOT AS BAD AS THE PLANE. 955 00:44:52,067 --> 00:44:54,800 AND I DON'T KNOW HOW MY BODY'S GONNA HANDLE IT. 956 00:44:54,800 --> 00:44:58,567 ** 957 00:44:58,567 --> 00:45:01,667 SO THAT'S WHAT'S REALLY SCARING ME RIGHT NOW. 958 00:45:01,667 --> 00:45:05,133 I JUST HAVE TO MAKE IT THROUGH THE NEXT FIVES HOURS, 959 00:45:05,133 --> 00:45:06,900 AND THEN I'M GOOD. 960 00:45:06,900 --> 00:45:09,133 THANK YOU, GUYS! 961 00:45:09,133 --> 00:45:10,833 YOU JUST WANT TO SIT THERE? 962 00:45:17,967 --> 00:45:24,833 ** 963 00:45:24,833 --> 00:45:31,733 ** 964 00:45:31,733 --> 00:45:35,233 I STILL HAVE A LONG WAY TO GO, 965 00:45:35,233 --> 00:45:38,567 BUT THEY'RE TAKING ME TO A HOTEL IN HOUSTON. 966 00:45:38,567 --> 00:45:40,433 WE DECIDED SINCE I'LL PROBABLY BE 967 00:45:40,433 --> 00:45:42,233 IN A GOOD BIT OF PAIN WHEN I GET THERE, 968 00:45:42,233 --> 00:45:44,433 TO TRY AND STAY IN A HOTEL TONIGHT, 969 00:45:44,433 --> 00:45:49,533 GO SEE DR. NOW IN THE MORNING, AND THEN GO TO MY APARTMENT. 970 00:45:49,533 --> 00:45:51,367 SUSAN IS GOING TO HELP ME GET IT ALL SET UP 971 00:45:51,367 --> 00:45:54,200 BEFORE SHE GOES BACK TO DENVER. 972 00:45:54,200 --> 00:45:56,967 SO, THAT'S THE PLAN. 973 00:45:56,967 --> 00:45:58,500 BUT FOR ME, THE MOST IMPORTANT THING 974 00:45:58,500 --> 00:46:01,500 IS THAT MY SCOOTER IS THERE WHEN I ARRIVE. 975 00:46:01,500 --> 00:46:03,667 WE HAD IT SENT TO THE HOTEL EARLIER, 976 00:46:03,667 --> 00:46:05,567 AND I'M JUST REALLY HOPING IT MAKES IT THERE 977 00:46:05,567 --> 00:46:06,933 BY THE TIME I DO, 978 00:46:06,933 --> 00:46:10,367 BECAUSE I CAN'T DO ANYTHING OR GO ANYWHERE WITHOUT IT. 979 00:46:20,200 --> 00:46:21,367 [ SUSAN LAUGHS ] 980 00:46:28,667 --> 00:46:31,767 WE FINALLY MADE IT TO HOUSTON, 981 00:46:31,767 --> 00:46:34,767 AND I AM IN A GOOD BIT OF PAIN. 982 00:46:34,767 --> 00:46:38,300 SO I AM VERY GLAD THAT WE'RE ALMOST THERE. 983 00:46:38,300 --> 00:46:41,300 BUT I'M CONCERNED ABOUT HOW GETTING OUT IS GONNA WORK, 984 00:46:41,300 --> 00:46:44,367 BECAUSE I AM SO SORE AND STIFF. 985 00:46:44,367 --> 00:46:46,567 IT'S NOT GONNA MATTER, THOUGH, IF MY SCOOTER'S NOT THERE, 986 00:46:46,567 --> 00:46:49,067 LIKE IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE. 987 00:46:49,067 --> 00:46:51,700 SO THAT'S MY BIGGEST CONCERN RIGHT NOW. 988 00:46:51,700 --> 00:46:54,733 ** 989 00:46:54,733 --> 00:46:56,600 IF IT'S NOT, THERE'S NO WAY 990 00:46:56,600 --> 00:46:59,100 I CAN WALK ALL THE WAY TO MY ROOM. 991 00:46:59,100 --> 00:47:01,267 ** 992 00:47:01,267 --> 00:47:03,600 THEY'LL HAVE TO EITHER CARRY ME TO THE BED THERE 993 00:47:03,600 --> 00:47:05,467 OR LEAVE ME HERE. 994 00:47:05,467 --> 00:47:08,700 THERE'S NO OTHER OPTION. 995 00:47:08,700 --> 00:47:10,900 SO I'M JUST REALLY ANXIOUS RIGHT NOW. 996 00:47:10,900 --> 00:47:18,900 ** 997 00:47:18,900 --> 00:47:20,367 YEAH. 998 00:47:20,367 --> 00:47:27,967 ** 999 00:47:34,600 --> 00:47:38,067 [ ENGINE IDLING ] 1000 00:47:41,967 --> 00:47:43,400 READY TO GET IN? 1001 00:47:45,767 --> 00:47:47,067 RELEASE. 1002 00:47:47,067 --> 00:47:53,533 ** 1003 00:47:53,533 --> 00:47:54,667 OKAY. 1004 00:47:54,667 --> 00:47:56,667 -READY TO SIT. -YEAH. 1005 00:47:56,667 --> 00:47:58,700 [ GROANS ] 1006 00:47:58,700 --> 00:48:02,067 OH, GOD. 1007 00:48:02,067 --> 00:48:04,167 OKAY. OW. 1008 00:48:04,167 --> 00:48:06,667 TWO, THREE. 1009 00:48:06,667 --> 00:48:07,733 [ Straining ] OH, GOD. 1010 00:48:07,733 --> 00:48:08,933 OH, GEEZ. 1011 00:48:08,933 --> 00:48:12,100 OKAY, L-LET ME GO. 1012 00:48:12,100 --> 00:48:13,733 LET ME GO. OKAY. 1013 00:48:13,733 --> 00:48:15,367 OH, GOD. 1014 00:48:15,367 --> 00:48:16,733 OH! THAT WAS MY KNEE. 1015 00:48:16,733 --> 00:48:18,900 AAH! OKAY. 1016 00:48:18,900 --> 00:48:20,767 OKAY. 1017 00:48:20,767 --> 00:48:23,633 YEAH. 1018 00:48:23,633 --> 00:48:24,800 THERE'S NOTHING TO BRACE AGAINST. 1019 00:48:24,800 --> 00:48:25,800 UGH! 1020 00:48:25,800 --> 00:48:27,233 OH GOD, OKAY. 1021 00:48:27,233 --> 00:48:28,500 I'M ON. 1022 00:48:28,500 --> 00:48:30,433 AS GOOD AS IT'S GONNA GET. 1023 00:48:30,433 --> 00:48:33,067 I DON'T NEED TO BE UP. 1024 00:48:33,067 --> 00:48:34,367 OKAY, I'M ON. 1025 00:48:34,367 --> 00:48:35,933 -I'M ON. -THANK YOU. 1026 00:48:35,933 --> 00:48:38,233 NO PROBLEM. 1027 00:48:38,233 --> 00:48:40,300 Susan: OKAY. THAT'D BE GREAT. 1028 00:48:40,300 --> 00:48:49,833 ** 1029 00:48:49,833 --> 00:48:54,367 Janine: I'M FINALLY ABOUT TO MAKE IT TO SEE DR. NOW, 1030 00:48:54,367 --> 00:48:56,667 AND MY STOMACH IS ALL IN KNOTS. 1031 00:48:56,667 --> 00:48:58,433 ** 1032 00:48:58,433 --> 00:48:59,533 BUT I'M TRYING NOT TO WORRY 1033 00:48:59,533 --> 00:49:02,067 ABOUT ALL THE WAYS THIS COULD GO WRONG. 1034 00:49:07,133 --> 00:49:09,633 WELL, UM... 1035 00:49:09,633 --> 00:49:12,600 I'M FEELING A LITTLE NERVOUS ABOUT MEETING HIM, 1036 00:49:12,600 --> 00:49:14,867 BUT I'M VERY HOPEFUL THAT, YOU KNOW, 1037 00:49:14,867 --> 00:49:16,900 HE'LL BE ABLE TO HELP ME. 1038 00:49:16,900 --> 00:49:19,767 ** 1039 00:49:19,767 --> 00:49:23,067 I JUST NEED TO GET THERE AND SEE WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN. 1040 00:49:23,067 --> 00:49:25,067 BECAUSE I'M WALKING INTO EVERYTHING 1041 00:49:25,067 --> 00:49:26,533 COMPLETELY BLIND. 1042 00:49:26,533 --> 00:49:28,833 ** 1043 00:49:28,833 --> 00:49:30,467 JANINE MUELLER? 1044 00:49:30,467 --> 00:49:39,833 ** 1045 00:49:39,833 --> 00:49:43,267 THIS IS REALLY SCARING ME. 1046 00:49:43,267 --> 00:49:45,900 OH, GOD. 1047 00:49:45,900 --> 00:49:47,467 OH, GEEZ. 1048 00:49:47,467 --> 00:49:50,133 OH, I CAN'T. 1049 00:49:50,133 --> 00:49:51,800 COME ON, JAN, JUST STEP UP. 1050 00:49:51,800 --> 00:49:53,567 I C-- [INHALES DEEPLY] 1051 00:49:53,567 --> 00:49:55,300 IT'S TOO NARROW. 1052 00:49:55,300 --> 00:49:59,500 ** 1053 00:49:59,500 --> 00:50:00,967 [ GROANS ] 1054 00:50:00,967 --> 00:50:02,667 GOD! 1055 00:50:02,667 --> 00:50:03,833 IT'S OKAY, JAN. 1056 00:50:03,833 --> 00:50:05,600 [ SOBBING ] 1057 00:50:11,667 --> 00:50:17,133 ** 1058 00:50:17,133 --> 00:50:18,600 [ SOBBING ] 1059 00:50:23,400 --> 00:50:25,933 OKAY. OKAY, OKAY, OKAY. 1060 00:50:25,933 --> 00:50:27,400 [ SIGHS ] 1061 00:50:27,400 --> 00:50:29,233 ALL RIGHT. 1062 00:50:29,233 --> 00:50:31,633 [ GROANS ] 1063 00:50:31,633 --> 00:50:36,500 ** 1064 00:50:36,500 --> 00:50:39,100 YOU CAN DO IT, JAN. COME ON, GET IT UP THERE. 1065 00:50:39,100 --> 00:50:40,567 OKAY. 1066 00:50:40,567 --> 00:50:46,900 ** 1067 00:50:46,900 --> 00:50:53,233 ** 1068 00:50:53,233 --> 00:50:56,367 IT'S SURREAL TO SEE THAT NUMBER. 1069 00:50:56,367 --> 00:51:00,067 OH, GEEZ. OKAY. 1070 00:51:00,067 --> 00:51:02,267 OH, I'M SORRY. 1071 00:51:02,267 --> 00:51:04,100 JUST GIVE ME A MINUTE. 1072 00:51:04,100 --> 00:51:05,833 [ BREATHING HEAVILY ] 1073 00:51:05,833 --> 00:51:10,300 HOW DID THAT HAPPEN? 1074 00:51:10,300 --> 00:51:13,133 I'M WORSE THAN EVER. 1075 00:51:13,133 --> 00:51:14,933 THIS HAS GOT TO STOP. 1076 00:51:14,933 --> 00:51:17,767 ** 1077 00:51:17,767 --> 00:51:21,600 MY FEAR RIGHT NOW IS THAT, SEEING ME IN PERSON, 1078 00:51:21,600 --> 00:51:23,867 THE DOCTOR'S GOING TO TAKE ONE LOOK AT ME 1079 00:51:23,867 --> 00:51:26,367 AND TELL ME HE THINKS THERE'S NOTHING HE CAN DO. 1080 00:51:26,367 --> 00:51:27,867 [ KNOCKS ON DOOR ] 1081 00:51:27,867 --> 00:51:29,833 ** 1082 00:51:29,833 --> 00:51:31,367 -HELLO. -HELLO. 1083 00:51:31,367 --> 00:51:32,433 HOW Y'ALL DOING? 1084 00:51:32,433 --> 00:51:34,400 GOOD, HOW ARE YOU? 1085 00:51:34,400 --> 00:51:35,700 ALL RIGHT. 1086 00:51:35,700 --> 00:51:38,700 I KNOW IT'S BEEN A VERY DIFFICULT JOURNEY FOR YOU. 1087 00:51:38,700 --> 00:51:40,533 AWFUL. [ CHUCKLES ] 1088 00:51:40,533 --> 00:51:42,067 I'M JUST SO GLAD TO BE HERE. 1089 00:51:42,067 --> 00:51:43,933 WELL, I'M GLAD YOU'RE FINALLY HERE. 1090 00:51:43,933 --> 00:51:46,133 SO, LET'S TALK ABOUT A COUPLE THINGS. 1091 00:51:46,133 --> 00:51:47,133 OKAY. 1092 00:51:47,133 --> 00:51:48,567 YOU'RE ACTUALLY BIGGER 1093 00:51:48,567 --> 00:51:50,900 THAN YOU THOUGHT YOU WERE ON OUR CALL. 1094 00:51:50,900 --> 00:51:52,400 YOU'RE 678. 1095 00:51:52,400 --> 00:51:54,067 AND AT 5'3", 1096 00:51:54,067 --> 00:51:58,200 YOU'RE, ESSENTIALLY, 550 POUNDS OVERWEIGHT. 1097 00:51:58,200 --> 00:52:00,500 GOOD LORD. OKAY. 1098 00:52:00,500 --> 00:52:03,467 WE DISCUSSED HOW CLOSE TO DEATH YOU ARE IN THIS STATE, 1099 00:52:03,467 --> 00:52:06,700 BUT YOU CLEARLY DIDN'T START THE DIET I SENT YOU. 1100 00:52:06,700 --> 00:52:09,067 SO WE NEED TO GET YOUR COMPULSION 1101 00:52:09,067 --> 00:52:11,300 UNDER CONTROL NOW. 1102 00:52:11,300 --> 00:52:14,267 BUT WHAT'S DRIVING YOU TO EAT? 1103 00:52:14,267 --> 00:52:16,733 A LOT OF TIMES, IT'S 'CAUSE I'M HUNGRY. 1104 00:52:16,733 --> 00:52:18,067 BUT THEN THERE ARE OTHER TIMES 1105 00:52:18,067 --> 00:52:21,267 WHERE, UM... IT'S LIKE A HABIT THING. 1106 00:52:21,267 --> 00:52:23,967 AND THEN, OF COURSE, IF THERE'S STRESS INVOLVED, 1107 00:52:23,967 --> 00:52:27,233 THEN YEAH, CHOCOLATE HAPPENS. 1108 00:52:27,233 --> 00:52:29,700 OKAY, YOU'RE GOING TO READ AND FOLLOW 1109 00:52:29,700 --> 00:52:33,833 THE 1,200-CALORIE- A-DAY DIET THAT I'M GIVING YOU AGAIN. 1110 00:52:33,833 --> 00:52:35,533 YES. 1111 00:52:35,533 --> 00:52:36,767 AND YOU'RE GOING TO STICK TO IT, 1112 00:52:36,767 --> 00:52:40,167 AS WELL AS START TO GET UP AND OUT OF THIS SCOOTER. 1113 00:52:40,167 --> 00:52:41,800 YES, SIR. 1114 00:52:41,800 --> 00:52:44,333 YOU'RE PRETTY MUCH IMMOBILE AT THIS POINT. 1115 00:52:44,333 --> 00:52:47,167 SO ALL THESE FACTORS TOGETHER MAKES SURGERY 1116 00:52:47,167 --> 00:52:50,300 FAR TOO RISKY TO PERFORM ON YOU. 1117 00:52:50,300 --> 00:52:52,833 AND YOU ARE NOT GONNA BE APPROVED 1118 00:52:52,833 --> 00:52:55,533 UNLESS YOU LOSE AT LEAST 100 POUNDS, OKAY? 1119 00:52:55,533 --> 00:52:57,367 -OOH. OKAY. -OKAY? 1120 00:52:57,367 --> 00:52:58,733 MOST EVERYBODY AT YOUR WEIGHT 1121 00:52:58,733 --> 00:53:00,567 CAN LOSE THAT IN TWO MONTHS. 1122 00:53:00,567 --> 00:53:02,700 OKAY. 1123 00:53:02,700 --> 00:53:05,367 WE HAVE A LOT OF WORK TO DO WITH JANINE. 1124 00:53:05,367 --> 00:53:09,067 BECAUSE AT HER HEIGHT, BEING OVER 600 POUNDS IS 1125 00:53:09,067 --> 00:53:11,800 COMPARABLE TO BEING OVER 800 POUNDS 1126 00:53:11,800 --> 00:53:14,567 FOR SOMEONE OF AVERAGE HEIGHT. 1127 00:53:14,567 --> 00:53:18,700 AND THAT COMBINED WITH THE FACT THAT SHE'S IMMOBILE ALL DAY LONG 1128 00:53:18,700 --> 00:53:22,167 MEANS HER BODY IS IN A VERY WEAKENED STATE, 1129 00:53:22,167 --> 00:53:25,433 AND IT IS FAR MORE LIKELY SHE'S GOING TO DIE 1130 00:53:25,433 --> 00:53:29,067 IN THE NEXT SIX MONTHS THAN IT IS SHE'LL LIVE. 1131 00:53:29,067 --> 00:53:33,167 SO IF WE DON'T GET THIS ALL UNDER CONTROL VERY SOON, 1132 00:53:33,167 --> 00:53:34,867 SHE'S NOT GOING TO MAKE IT. 1133 00:53:34,867 --> 00:53:38,233 ALL RIGHT, JANINE, WHEN I SEE YOU NEXT TIME, 1134 00:53:38,233 --> 00:53:40,900 I WANT YOU TO BE ABLE TO GET OUT OF THE SCOOTER 1135 00:53:40,900 --> 00:53:43,267 AND WALK IN THIS ROOM, OKAY? 1136 00:53:43,267 --> 00:53:45,300 YES, SIR. ALL RIGHT. 1137 00:53:45,300 --> 00:53:46,767 -THANK YOU. -MM-HMM. 1138 00:53:46,767 --> 00:53:51,067 YOU'RE WELCOME. 1139 00:53:51,067 --> 00:53:52,067 LET'S GO. 1140 00:53:52,067 --> 00:53:53,300 ALL RIGHT, LET ME GET THE DOOR. 1141 00:53:53,300 --> 00:53:54,467 PLEASE. 1142 00:53:54,467 --> 00:53:59,367 ** 1143 00:53:59,367 --> 00:54:02,933 I KNOW I WAS SUPPOSED TO HAVE STARTED ON HIS DIET BY NOW, 1144 00:54:02,933 --> 00:54:06,633 BUT I WAS SO FOCUSED ON THE MOVE AND TRYING TO GET HERE. 1145 00:54:06,633 --> 00:54:08,400 AND NOW THAT I AM, 1146 00:54:08,400 --> 00:54:09,767 TO HEAR THOSE WORDS -- 1147 00:54:09,767 --> 00:54:12,167 LOSE 100 POUNDS IN TWO MONTHS? 1148 00:54:12,167 --> 00:54:15,133 THAT WAS LIKE A SOCK IN THE STOMACH. 1149 00:54:15,133 --> 00:54:17,400 I NEED HIS HELP DESPERATELY. 1150 00:54:17,400 --> 00:54:19,600 SO AS IMPOSSIBLE AS IT SEEMS, 1151 00:54:19,600 --> 00:54:21,167 I HAVE TO TRY. 1152 00:54:21,167 --> 00:54:23,133 ** 1153 00:54:25,267 --> 00:54:33,367 ** 1154 00:54:33,367 --> 00:54:36,933 I FEEL LIKE I'VE BEEN DOING WELL THIS PAST MONTH. 1155 00:54:36,933 --> 00:54:41,667 TRYING TO GET SETTLED IN AND FIGURE OUT LIVE IN TEXAS. 1156 00:54:41,667 --> 00:54:43,067 AFTER MY LAST APPOINTMENT, 1157 00:54:43,067 --> 00:54:46,400 MY SISTER-IN-LAW SUSAN HELPED ME MOVE INTO MY NEW PLACE, 1158 00:54:46,400 --> 00:54:48,333 BUT THEN HAD TO GO BACK HOME. 1159 00:54:48,333 --> 00:54:51,533 SO I'M ALL ALONE AGAIN. 1160 00:54:51,533 --> 00:54:53,333 BUT SHE SAID SHE'D TRY TO VISIT SOON 1161 00:54:53,333 --> 00:54:56,533 AND THAT MY NIECE WOULD ALSO COME DOWN TO SEE ME. 1162 00:54:56,533 --> 00:55:00,367 SO KNOWING THAT IS KEEPING ME MOTIVATED. 1163 00:55:00,367 --> 00:55:01,600 DR. NOW WANTED ME TO GET UP 1164 00:55:01,600 --> 00:55:04,167 AND START WALKING WITHOUT MY SCOOTER, 1165 00:55:04,167 --> 00:55:08,633 BUT MY LYMPHEDEMA PREVENTS ME FROM BEING ABLE TO DO MUCH, 1166 00:55:08,633 --> 00:55:13,333 SO I'M DOING WHAT I CAN TO MOVE AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE IN MY BED. 1167 00:55:13,333 --> 00:55:16,767 BUT THE PRESSURE IT PUTS ON MY KNEE AND LEGS... 1168 00:55:16,767 --> 00:55:19,433 THE LYMPHEDEMA MAKES ME SO UNSTEADY. 1169 00:55:19,433 --> 00:55:21,467 SO EVEN WHEN I TRY, 1170 00:55:21,467 --> 00:55:22,600 IT FEELS LIKE MY WHOLE LEG 1171 00:55:22,600 --> 00:55:25,100 IS ABOUT TO JUMP OFF THE REST OF MY BODY. 1172 00:55:25,100 --> 00:55:27,467 ** 1173 00:55:27,467 --> 00:55:29,700 AND UNTIL I HAVE THIS MASS REMOVED, 1174 00:55:29,700 --> 00:55:32,567 I'M NOT GOING TO BE WALKING MUCH. 1175 00:55:32,567 --> 00:55:36,067 [ SMACKS LIPS ] HEY, BABY KITTEN. 1176 00:55:36,067 --> 00:55:39,067 SO NOW I'M COMPLETELY RELIANT ON MY SCOOTER. 1177 00:55:39,067 --> 00:55:42,967 THERE'S JUST NO WAY I COULD DO WITHOUT IT. 1178 00:55:42,967 --> 00:55:44,633 I WOULD LOVE TO GIVE IT UP. 1179 00:55:44,633 --> 00:55:47,167 BELIEVE ME -- I WISH I COULD. 1180 00:55:47,167 --> 00:55:48,667 BUT IT'S BEST THAT I DON'T PUT MYSELF 1181 00:55:48,667 --> 00:55:50,467 THROUGH TOO MUCH PAIN RIGHT. 1182 00:55:50,467 --> 00:55:51,800 BECAUSE WHEN I'M IN A LOT OF PAIN, 1183 00:55:51,800 --> 00:55:54,333 I TRY TO DO THINGS TO DISTRACT MYSELF 1184 00:55:54,333 --> 00:55:56,467 FROM THE PAIN. 1185 00:55:56,467 --> 00:56:00,333 ONE OF THE THINGS I USED TO DO WAS I WOULD EAT...OF COURSE. 1186 00:56:00,333 --> 00:56:03,467 SOME OF THE THINGS I WOULD EAT WOULD BE SUGARY THINGS. 1187 00:56:03,467 --> 00:56:08,167 OF COURSE, I'VE LEARNED I CAN'T JUST EAT ANYTHING ANYMORE. 1188 00:56:08,167 --> 00:56:10,867 BUT I'M NOT GONNA LIE, IT'S TOUGH -- 1189 00:56:10,867 --> 00:56:12,167 REALLY TOUGH. 1190 00:56:12,167 --> 00:56:22,067 ** 1191 00:56:22,067 --> 00:56:24,133 I'M GOING TO SEE DR. NOWZARADAN TODAY. 1192 00:56:24,133 --> 00:56:26,633 AND I'M FEELING PRETTY GOOD ABOUT IT. 1193 00:56:26,633 --> 00:56:27,900 I'M FEELING CHANGES IN MY BODY, 1194 00:56:27,900 --> 00:56:30,900 SO I THINK I'VE LOST SOME WEIGHT. 1195 00:56:30,900 --> 00:56:33,067 SO I THINK WE'RE DOING PRETTY GOOD. 1196 00:56:33,067 --> 00:56:37,200 ** 1197 00:56:37,200 --> 00:56:39,133 I KNOW DR. NOW WANTED ME TO BE ABLE TO WALK 1198 00:56:39,133 --> 00:56:41,600 TO THE EXAM ROOM THIS TIME, 1199 00:56:41,600 --> 00:56:45,833 BUT AS HARD AS I TRIED, I'M NOWHERE NEAR CLOSE TO THAT, 1200 00:56:45,833 --> 00:56:47,800 SO I'M HOPING HE DOESN'T SEE THAT AS A REASON 1201 00:56:47,800 --> 00:56:49,833 I'M NOT READY FOR SURGERY YET. 1202 00:56:49,833 --> 00:56:51,967 ** 1203 00:56:51,967 --> 00:56:55,300 'CAUSE I'M TRYING REALLY, REALLY HARD. 1204 00:56:55,300 --> 00:56:56,600 JANINE MUELLER? 1205 00:56:56,600 --> 00:56:59,900 ** 1206 00:56:59,900 --> 00:57:02,733 I FEEL PRETTY CONFIDENT THAT SOMETHING'S DEFINITELY 1207 00:57:02,733 --> 00:57:05,267 GONNA BE DIFFERENT ON THAT SCALE TODAY. 1208 00:57:10,300 --> 00:57:11,633 BUT EVERYONE'S ALWAYS JUST NERVOUS 1209 00:57:11,633 --> 00:57:13,100 BEFORE THEY GET ON THE SCALE, 1210 00:57:13,100 --> 00:57:14,933 EVEN WHEN THEY KNOW THEY'VE DONE WELL. 1211 00:57:14,933 --> 00:57:17,600 ** 1212 00:57:17,600 --> 00:57:18,867 DR. NOW TOLD ME THAT I NEEDED 1213 00:57:18,867 --> 00:57:21,900 TO LOSE 100 POUNDS OVER THE LAST TWO MONTHS, 1214 00:57:21,900 --> 00:57:25,300 SO I'M SUPPOSED TO BE BELOW 578 THIS TIME. 1215 00:57:25,300 --> 00:57:26,367 OH, DEAR. 1216 00:57:26,367 --> 00:57:28,200 OH, GOD. [ GRUNTS ] 1217 00:57:28,200 --> 00:57:31,133 ** 1218 00:57:31,133 --> 00:57:33,100 JUST STICK ON SOMETHING GOOD. 1219 00:57:37,600 --> 00:57:39,733 I'M DONE. [ CHUCKLES ] 1220 00:57:39,733 --> 00:57:43,433 ** 1221 00:57:43,433 --> 00:57:45,733 I DON'T UNDERSTAND HOW THAT'S POSSIBLE. 1222 00:57:49,833 --> 00:57:51,767 [ GRUNTS ] 1223 00:57:51,767 --> 00:57:53,967 I DID WHAT I WAS SUPPOSED TO. 1224 00:57:53,967 --> 00:58:00,333 ** 1225 00:58:00,333 --> 00:58:03,333 SO I'M SCARED. 1226 00:58:03,333 --> 00:58:05,400 BUT I DON'T THINK HE'LL YELL AT ME, 1227 00:58:05,400 --> 00:58:07,367 SO I'M OKAY. 1228 00:58:07,367 --> 00:58:10,267 [ KNOCKS ON DOOR ] 1229 00:58:10,267 --> 00:58:12,500 -HELLO. -HELLO. 1230 00:58:12,500 --> 00:58:15,733 ALL RIGHT. SO, YOU'RE AT 663, 1231 00:58:15,733 --> 00:58:20,067 WHICH MEANS IN TWO MONTHS, YOU ONLY LOST 15 POUNDS. 1232 00:58:20,067 --> 00:58:21,433 YES, SIR. 1233 00:58:21,433 --> 00:58:22,667 SO, HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT THAT? 1234 00:58:22,667 --> 00:58:23,667 PRETTY GOOD. 1235 00:58:23,667 --> 00:58:25,067 I FEEL PRETTY GOOD. 1236 00:58:25,067 --> 00:58:27,400 YOU FEEL PRETTY GOOD ABOUT THAT? 1237 00:58:27,400 --> 00:58:29,233 WELL, YOU SHOULDN'T. 1238 00:58:29,233 --> 00:58:32,067 AND YOU'RE STILL NOT UP AND WALKING. 1239 00:58:32,067 --> 00:58:35,167 I REALLY CAN'T DO MUCH RIGHT NOW. 1240 00:58:35,167 --> 00:58:38,433 MY KNEES ARE JUST STILL REALLY PAINFUL. 1241 00:58:38,433 --> 00:58:41,067 YEAH, AND THE LYMPHEDEMA IS REALLY MAKING 1242 00:58:41,067 --> 00:58:42,567 MY RIGHT KNEE WORSE. 1243 00:58:42,567 --> 00:58:45,200 LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT. 1244 00:58:45,200 --> 00:58:46,400 'CAUSE OF THE WAY IT IS. 1245 00:58:46,400 --> 00:58:48,067 IT'S LIKE STARTING TO GET SOFT 1246 00:58:48,067 --> 00:58:50,800 AND PRESSES IN ON MY KNEE JOINT HERE. 1247 00:58:50,800 --> 00:58:51,900 MM. 1248 00:58:51,900 --> 00:58:53,833 SO I'M GETTING A LOT OF THE PRESSURE HERE. 1249 00:58:53,833 --> 00:58:58,333 AND THEN ALSO UP HERE LIKE AT THE VERY TOP OF MY GROIN AREA. 1250 00:58:58,333 --> 00:59:00,500 BUT YOU'VE GOT SOME INFECTION 1251 00:59:00,500 --> 00:59:03,100 BUILT UP BETWEEN BACK THERE. 1252 00:59:03,100 --> 00:59:05,533 OOH, THAT DOESN'T LOOK THAT GOOD. 1253 00:59:05,533 --> 00:59:06,767 IT IS INFECTED. 1254 00:59:06,767 --> 00:59:08,800 OH, DEAR. 1255 00:59:08,800 --> 00:59:11,900 I DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE. 1256 00:59:11,900 --> 00:59:14,667 LET ME LOOK AT IT A LITTLE BIT CLOSER, SEE... 1257 00:59:18,367 --> 00:59:20,300 YEAH. THIS IS INFECTED. 1258 00:59:20,300 --> 00:59:22,433 ** 1259 00:59:22,433 --> 00:59:25,700 THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR JANINE TO ONLY HAVE LOST 1260 00:59:25,700 --> 00:59:27,967 15 POUNDS IN TWO MONTHS. 1261 00:59:27,967 --> 00:59:30,767 SO SHE'S STILL EATING WHAT SHE WANTS, 1262 00:59:30,767 --> 00:59:33,333 AND CONVINCED HERSELF THAT'S OKAY 1263 00:59:33,333 --> 00:59:36,067 AND THAT SHE'S STILL STICKING TO THE DIET. 1264 00:59:36,067 --> 00:59:39,200 BUT RIGHT, NOW WE NEED TO ADDRESS HER PHYSICAL CONDITION 1265 00:59:39,200 --> 00:59:40,767 SO SHE CAN SURVIVE, 1266 00:59:40,767 --> 00:59:42,967 SO I NEED TO ADMIT HER TO THE HOSPITAL, 1267 00:59:42,967 --> 00:59:45,600 NOT JUST TO GET HER INFECTION UNDER CONTROL, 1268 00:59:45,600 --> 00:59:48,067 BUT TO PUT HER ON A CONTROLLED DIET 1269 00:59:48,067 --> 00:59:50,733 SO WE CAN GET HER WEIGHT DOWN. 1270 00:59:50,733 --> 00:59:53,267 INSTEAD OF TAKING THIS OPPORTUNITY 1271 00:59:53,267 --> 00:59:55,600 TO START TURNING YOUR LIFE AROUND, 1272 00:59:55,600 --> 00:59:58,267 YOU'RE GETTING WORSE RAPIDLY. 1273 00:59:58,267 --> 01:00:00,467 AND AT THIS POINT, I'M CONCERNED 1274 01:00:00,467 --> 01:00:03,767 YOU'RE NOT EVEN GOING TO SURVIVE THE NEXT COUPLE MONTHS. 1275 01:00:03,767 --> 01:00:07,167 THAT INFECTION ALONE CAN KILL YOU QUICKLY. 1276 01:00:07,167 --> 01:00:09,600 SO I'M ADMITTING YOU TO THE HOSPITAL TODAY 1277 01:00:09,600 --> 01:00:11,333 TO GET YOUR WEIGHT UNDER CONTROL. 1278 01:00:11,333 --> 01:00:14,233 AND WE NEED TO GET THAT INFECTION CLEARED UP 1279 01:00:14,233 --> 01:00:17,000 BEFORE IT GETS ANY WORSE AND KILLS YOU. 1280 01:00:17,000 --> 01:00:18,467 OKAY. 1281 01:00:18,467 --> 01:00:19,733 WOULD IT BE FOR LIKE A DAY, 1282 01:00:19,733 --> 01:00:21,433 OR JUST FOR A COUPLE HOURS, OR...? 1283 01:00:21,433 --> 01:00:23,300 NO, IT'S GOING TO BE FOR LONGER. 1284 01:00:23,300 --> 01:00:25,800 OKAY, I HAVE TO FIGURE OUT WHAT TO DO WITH MY CAT. 1285 01:00:25,800 --> 01:00:28,600 THAT'S GONNA BE A PROBLEM. I'LL FIGURE IT OUT. 1286 01:00:28,600 --> 01:00:31,233 I'LL HAVE MEDICAL TRANSPORT COME PICK YOU UP NOW. 1287 01:00:31,233 --> 01:00:32,433 OKAY. 1288 01:00:32,433 --> 01:00:33,933 I'LL SEE YOU THEN. 1289 01:00:33,933 --> 01:00:37,233 ** 1290 01:00:37,233 --> 01:00:40,000 THIS IS THE VERY LAST THING I NEEDED TO HEAR RIGHT NOW. 1291 01:00:40,000 --> 01:00:42,100 I NEED STUFF FROM HOME TO BE IN THE HOSPITAL. 1292 01:00:42,100 --> 01:00:44,067 I DON'T KNOW HOW I'M GONNA DO THAT 1293 01:00:44,067 --> 01:00:46,333 [Voice breaking] 'CAUSE I DON'T KNOW ANYBODY HERE. 1294 01:00:46,333 --> 01:00:49,367 I NEED TO TAKE CARE OF MY CAT. 1295 01:00:49,367 --> 01:00:53,267 BUT I DON'T KNOW HOW I CAN DO THAT. 1296 01:00:53,267 --> 01:00:55,067 I'M JUST... I NEED TO THINK IT THROUGH. 1297 01:00:55,067 --> 01:00:57,233 THERE'S GOT TO BE A SOLUTION -- I NEED TO THINK IT THROUGH -- 1298 01:00:57,233 --> 01:01:00,167 BUT IT'S LIKE... 1299 01:01:00,167 --> 01:01:03,067 THIS IS SO HARD, TO BE BY MYSELF. 1300 01:01:03,067 --> 01:01:03,633 SO I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA DO. 1301 01:01:09,333 --> 01:01:18,367 ** 1302 01:01:18,367 --> 01:01:27,400 ** 1303 01:01:27,400 --> 01:01:36,433 ** 1304 01:01:36,433 --> 01:01:37,567 Janine: IT WAS A BIG SURPRISE, 1305 01:01:37,567 --> 01:01:40,167 HAVING TO COME TO A HOSPITAL SO QUICK. 1306 01:01:40,167 --> 01:01:41,800 BUT THEY GAVE ME A MEDICAL ASSISTANT 1307 01:01:41,800 --> 01:01:43,233 TO HELP GET ME SOME CLOTHES 1308 01:01:43,233 --> 01:01:45,667 AND HELP GET MY CAT BOARDED FOR NOW, 1309 01:01:45,667 --> 01:01:48,300 BECAUSE I HAD TO COME HERE IMMEDIATELY. 1310 01:01:48,300 --> 01:01:51,300 [ KNOCKS ON DOOR ] COME IN. 1311 01:01:51,300 --> 01:01:53,633 -HI! -HEY-O! 1312 01:01:53,633 --> 01:01:55,533 IT'S BEEN A BIT OF A WHIRLWIND. 1313 01:01:59,067 --> 01:02:02,767 AND I DIDN'T REALIZE HOW BAD MY LEG WAS. 1314 01:02:02,767 --> 01:02:04,667 IF YOU WANT ME TO, I CAN PULL OUT MY CELL PHONE 1315 01:02:04,667 --> 01:02:06,267 AND WE CAN TAKE A PICTURE OF IT. 1316 01:02:06,267 --> 01:02:07,900 AND I COULD SHOW IT TO YOU AND I'LL DELETE IT. 1317 01:02:07,900 --> 01:02:09,233 OKAY, SURE. 1318 01:02:09,233 --> 01:02:10,767 JUST SO I KNOW WHAT WE'RE DEALING WITH. 1319 01:02:15,867 --> 01:02:17,200 OKAY. 1320 01:02:17,200 --> 01:02:18,633 THAT'S MY HAND. OKAY? 1321 01:02:18,633 --> 01:02:20,067 SO YOU CAN SEE HOW THAT IS? 1322 01:02:20,067 --> 01:02:21,200 HOLY [BLEEP]. 1323 01:02:21,200 --> 01:02:22,700 -YEAH. -I HAD NO IDEA. 1324 01:02:22,700 --> 01:02:24,133 SO THAT'S ON THE BACK OF MY THIGH? 1325 01:02:24,133 --> 01:02:26,067 MM-HMM. IT'S REALLY OPEN. 1326 01:02:26,067 --> 01:02:28,367 OH, MY GOD. I HAD NO IDEA IT WAS SO BAD. 1327 01:02:28,367 --> 01:02:29,400 YEAH. 1328 01:02:29,400 --> 01:02:31,733 I NEED TO FIND A WAY TO DEAL WITH THAT. 1329 01:02:31,733 --> 01:02:34,733 WELL, THAT'S WHY YOU'RE HERE, HONEY. 1330 01:02:34,733 --> 01:02:36,633 YOU'RE DOING THE RIGHT THING -- YOU'RE ON THE ROAD. 1331 01:02:36,633 --> 01:02:38,300 -THANK YOU. -CALL ME IF YOU NEED ANYTHING. 1332 01:02:38,300 --> 01:02:41,067 WILL DO. 1333 01:02:41,067 --> 01:02:42,667 Janine: I DON'T LIKE IT HERE, 1334 01:02:42,667 --> 01:02:45,667 AND I REALLY FEEL LIKE THE DIET IS TOO EXTREME 1335 01:02:45,667 --> 01:02:46,833 AND THAT I'M BEING PUSHED TOO HARD 1336 01:02:46,833 --> 01:02:49,433 TO DO THINGS I'M NOT READY FOR. 1337 01:02:49,433 --> 01:02:51,433 SO ONCE THEY GET MY INFECTION CLEARED UP 1338 01:02:51,433 --> 01:02:54,300 AND IT'S NO LONGER ENDANGERING MY LIFE, 1339 01:02:54,300 --> 01:02:55,767 I WANT TO GO HOME. 1340 01:02:58,367 --> 01:03:06,167 ** 1341 01:03:06,167 --> 01:03:08,367 Dr. Nowzaradan: JANINE HAS BEEN IN THE HOSPITAL 1342 01:03:08,367 --> 01:03:10,500 FOR A FEW MONTHS NOW. 1343 01:03:10,500 --> 01:03:13,067 HER HEALTH IS IN A BETTER PLACE, 1344 01:03:13,067 --> 01:03:15,500 BUT SHE HAD EVERY EXCUSE IN THE BOOK 1345 01:03:15,500 --> 01:03:17,333 TO FIGHT US ABOUT HER DIET 1346 01:03:17,333 --> 01:03:19,933 AND GETTING UP AND OUT OF HER BED. 1347 01:03:19,933 --> 01:03:23,767 AND SOME OF THE THINGS SHE SAYS SOUND DELUSIONAL. 1348 01:03:23,767 --> 01:03:25,367 THE BIGGEST ONE BEING THAT 1349 01:03:25,367 --> 01:03:28,267 SHE BELIEVES SHE IS BULIMIC. 1350 01:03:28,267 --> 01:03:30,900 BULIMIA IS A SERIOUS CONDITION, 1351 01:03:30,900 --> 01:03:33,733 BUT NOT ONE SHE IS EVEN CLOSE TO HAVING. 1352 01:03:33,733 --> 01:03:35,900 SO SHE'S EITHER LYING 1353 01:03:35,900 --> 01:03:38,567 OR SHE HAS AN INCREDIBLY ABILITY 1354 01:03:38,567 --> 01:03:42,833 TO CONVINCE HERSELF INTO DELUSIONAL PERSPECTIVES. 1355 01:03:42,833 --> 01:03:45,433 EITHER IS A BAD SITUATION. 1356 01:03:45,433 --> 01:03:48,500 ** 1357 01:03:48,500 --> 01:03:49,467 HI, JANINE. 1358 01:03:49,467 --> 01:03:51,467 HI, DR. NOWZARADAN. 1359 01:03:51,467 --> 01:03:52,967 HOW YOU FEELING TODAY? 1360 01:03:52,967 --> 01:03:54,300 BETTER. 1361 01:03:54,300 --> 01:03:55,567 OKAY, GREAT. 1362 01:03:55,567 --> 01:03:58,200 THEN WE'LL SEE HOW YOUR WEIGHT IS DOING TODAY, 1363 01:03:58,200 --> 01:03:59,767 AND THEN WE'LL SEND YOU HOME. 1364 01:03:59,767 --> 01:04:00,867 OKAY. 1365 01:04:00,867 --> 01:04:02,733 BUT YOUR HARD WORK ISN'T OVER NOW. 1366 01:04:02,733 --> 01:04:05,067 WE'RE GOING TO SEND YOU TO PSYCHOTHERAPY. 1367 01:04:05,067 --> 01:04:09,533 I'M EXPECTING THAT YOU WILL HAVE A GOOD SESSION WITH THERAPY. 1368 01:04:09,533 --> 01:04:11,300 YOU STILL THINK YOU ARE BULIMIC? 1369 01:04:11,300 --> 01:04:13,400 WELL, MY PROBLEM IS I DON'T WANT TO EAT. 1370 01:04:13,400 --> 01:04:14,767 WHAT DO YOU MEAN THAT IS THE PROBLEM? 1371 01:04:14,767 --> 01:04:17,500 THAT'S NOT THE PROBLEM, IF YOU DON'T WANT TO EAT. 1372 01:04:17,500 --> 01:04:20,633 IF THAT'S THE CASE, IT'S AN EXCELLENT PROBLEM. 1373 01:04:20,633 --> 01:04:22,400 BUT THAT'S SIMPLY NOT TRUE. 1374 01:04:22,400 --> 01:04:25,067 YOU WOULD HAVE LOST A LOT MORE WEIGHT. 1375 01:04:25,067 --> 01:04:27,400 SO IF I DON'T WANT TO EAT, IT'S NOT A PROBLEM? 1376 01:04:28,767 --> 01:04:33,300 JANINE, YOU'RE 54 YEARS AND YOU'RE 500-PLUS POUNDS, 1377 01:04:33,300 --> 01:04:38,200 AND YOU THINK YOU NOT WANTING TO EAT IS THE PROBLEM? 1378 01:04:38,200 --> 01:04:39,700 YOU KEEP SAYING YOU'RE BULIMIC, 1379 01:04:39,700 --> 01:04:41,667 YOU KEEP SAYING YOU DON'T WANT TO EAT. 1380 01:04:41,667 --> 01:04:44,067 SO YOU NEED TO GIVE UP THAT 1381 01:04:44,067 --> 01:04:46,367 AND WORK THROUGH THESE ISSUES NOW. 1382 01:04:46,367 --> 01:04:48,133 ARE YOU EVER GONNA BE ABLE 1383 01:04:48,133 --> 01:04:50,167 TO START DOING EXERCISES AT HOME? 1384 01:04:50,167 --> 01:04:51,300 YES. 1385 01:04:51,300 --> 01:04:52,667 ARE YOU GONNA WATCH YOUR DIET 1386 01:04:52,667 --> 01:04:55,067 AND STICK WITH A 1,200-CALORIE DIET? 1387 01:04:55,067 --> 01:04:56,633 ABSOLUTELY. 1388 01:04:56,633 --> 01:04:59,567 OKAY, YOU NEED TO GET ALL THIS UNDER CONTROL 1389 01:04:59,567 --> 01:05:02,067 AND SHOW ME YOU CAN DO THIS ON YOUR OWN 1390 01:05:02,067 --> 01:05:03,800 IF YOU WANT WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY. 1391 01:05:03,800 --> 01:05:05,667 AND OVER THE NEXT TWO MONTHS, 1392 01:05:05,667 --> 01:05:09,233 I WANT YOU TO LOSE ANOTHER 50 POUNDS, OKAY? 1393 01:05:09,233 --> 01:05:12,167 CAN WE GET YOU UP AND CHECK YOUR WEIGHT? 1394 01:05:12,167 --> 01:05:14,233 SURE. 1395 01:05:14,233 --> 01:05:16,433 THEN YOU CAN GET BACK ON YOUR SCOOTER 1396 01:05:16,433 --> 01:05:20,067 AND THEN HEAD HOME, HUH? 1397 01:05:20,067 --> 01:05:21,633 YAY. OKAY. 1398 01:05:21,633 --> 01:05:23,700 ALL RIGHT. 1399 01:05:23,700 --> 01:05:27,633 JANINE CAN'T STAY IN THE HOSPITAL FOREVER. 1400 01:05:27,633 --> 01:05:31,600 SO NOW IS THE TIME TO SHOW US THAT SHE CAN DO THIS. 1401 01:05:31,600 --> 01:05:35,767 AND IF SHE DOES, WE'LL DO WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY ON HER. 1402 01:05:35,767 --> 01:05:38,067 -ALMOST. -OKAY. 1403 01:05:38,067 --> 01:05:40,767 Dr. Nowzaradan: ALL RIGHT, 553. 1404 01:05:40,767 --> 01:05:43,067 THE WALKER WEIGHS 8 POUNDS, 1405 01:05:43,067 --> 01:05:48,633 SO THAT MEANS THAT'S YOUR ACTUALLY 545 POUNDS. 1406 01:05:48,633 --> 01:05:52,167 OKAY. 1407 01:05:52,167 --> 01:05:53,700 OH, YEAH, ALL RIGHT. 1408 01:05:53,700 --> 01:05:56,167 I SEE WHERE YOU ARE NOW. 1409 01:05:56,167 --> 01:05:57,533 OKAY, I'M THERE. 1410 01:05:57,533 --> 01:05:59,367 -YOU THERE? -ALL RIGHT, I'M THERE. 1411 01:05:59,367 --> 01:06:01,567 ** 1412 01:06:01,567 --> 01:06:02,667 ALL RIGHT, I'LL SEE YOU LATER. 1413 01:06:02,667 --> 01:06:03,667 ALL RIGHT, THANK YOU. 1414 01:06:03,667 --> 01:06:10,433 ** 1415 01:06:10,433 --> 01:06:11,633 Janine: I'M DISAPPOINTED. 1416 01:06:11,633 --> 01:06:14,667 I DIDN'T GET SURGERY WHILE I WAS HERE. 1417 01:06:14,667 --> 01:06:16,100 I FEEL LIKE IT'S A LITTLE RIDICULOUS 1418 01:06:16,100 --> 01:06:18,100 THAT I HAVE TO GO HOME AND KEEP LOSING WEIGHT 1419 01:06:18,100 --> 01:06:21,133 TO PROVE TO DR. NOW I'M READY. 1420 01:06:21,133 --> 01:06:22,733 BUT IF THAT'S WHAT HE WANTS ME TO DO, 1421 01:06:22,733 --> 01:06:23,800 THEN I'LL DO IT. 1422 01:06:26,067 --> 01:06:29,233 BECAUSE I HAVEN'T PUT MYSELF THROUGH ALL THIS PAIN AND TRIAL 1423 01:06:29,233 --> 01:06:31,367 JUST TO NOT GET SURGERY. 1424 01:06:31,367 --> 01:06:37,533 ** 1425 01:06:37,533 --> 01:06:43,667 ** 1426 01:06:43,667 --> 01:06:46,600 I FEEL LIKE I'VE BEEN DOING WELL. 1427 01:06:46,600 --> 01:06:48,167 I HAVEN'T MADE IT TO THERAPY YET, 1428 01:06:48,167 --> 01:06:50,500 BUT I'M GOING TO GO SOON. 1429 01:06:50,500 --> 01:06:52,133 I JUST WANT TO GET MY ENERGY UP 1430 01:06:52,133 --> 01:06:55,067 BEFORE I GO OUT AND DO SOMETHING LIKE THAT. 1431 01:06:55,067 --> 01:06:58,500 SO I FEEL LIKE THINGS ARE ON TRACK. 1432 01:06:58,500 --> 01:07:00,167 BUT TODAY IS A BIG DAY FOR ME 1433 01:07:00,167 --> 01:07:04,400 BECAUSE MY NIECE FLEW IN TO SEE ME, 1434 01:07:04,400 --> 01:07:08,067 AND I'M EXCITED TO JUST HAVE ANYONE I KNOW. 1435 01:07:08,067 --> 01:07:10,867 BUT SHE AND I HAVE BEEN ESPECIALLY CLOSE. 1436 01:07:10,867 --> 01:07:12,833 IT'S BEEN A LITTLE HARD, 1437 01:07:12,833 --> 01:07:15,633 BEEN A LITTLE LONELY WITHOUT HAVING FRIENDS CLOSE BY, 1438 01:07:15,633 --> 01:07:17,867 AND I HAVEN'T MADE THOSE CONNECTIONS HERE YET, 1439 01:07:17,867 --> 01:07:20,133 BUT I WILL. 1440 01:07:20,133 --> 01:07:22,500 SO, THIS IS A REAL BIG TREAT FOR ME. 1441 01:07:25,433 --> 01:07:27,167 -COME IN. -HELLO! 1442 01:07:27,167 --> 01:07:28,167 HEY! 1443 01:07:28,167 --> 01:07:29,933 -HI! -HI, GIRL! 1444 01:07:29,933 --> 01:07:31,800 IT'S SO GOOD TO SEE YOU! 1445 01:07:31,800 --> 01:07:32,967 OH, LOOK HOW PRETTY YOU LOOK! 1446 01:07:32,967 --> 01:07:34,800 AWW! YOU, TOO. 1447 01:07:34,800 --> 01:07:36,267 HOW YOU DOING? 1448 01:07:36,267 --> 01:07:37,467 -I'M GOOD. -GOOD. 1449 01:07:37,467 --> 01:07:40,733 I FEEL LIKE JAN AND I HAVE BEEN REALLY CLOSE. 1450 01:07:40,733 --> 01:07:42,300 WE LIKE A LOT OF THE SAME THINGS, 1451 01:07:42,300 --> 01:07:46,233 BUT PHYSICALLY, WE'VE NOT EVER BEEN IN THE SAME PLACE, 1452 01:07:46,233 --> 01:07:48,900 AND THAT'S ALWAYS CAUSED SOME BARRIERS. 1453 01:07:48,900 --> 01:07:50,733 DO YOU REMEMBER KIND OF WHAT THE DOCTOR TOLD YOU 1454 01:07:50,733 --> 01:07:52,233 AS FAR AS LIKE EATING? 1455 01:07:52,233 --> 01:07:53,633 LIKE WHERE ARE WE AT WITH THAT 1456 01:07:53,633 --> 01:07:55,967 AS FAR AS WHAT'S ALLOWED AND... 1457 01:07:55,967 --> 01:08:00,067 WELL, IT WAS SORT OF MORE LIKE WHAT NOT TO DO, 1458 01:08:00,067 --> 01:08:03,067 AS OPPOSED TO WHAT TO DO. 1459 01:08:03,067 --> 01:08:04,833 Janine: I THINK MY NIECE AND I ARE PRETTY CLOSE. 1460 01:08:04,833 --> 01:08:06,633 OUR RELATIONSHIP IS PRETTY SPECIAL. 1461 01:08:06,633 --> 01:08:08,600 AND I HAVEN'T SEEN HER FOR A WHILE. 1462 01:08:08,600 --> 01:08:11,467 I DON'T KNOW IF MY NIECE RACHEL HAS SEEN ME AT THIS SIZE. 1463 01:08:11,467 --> 01:08:14,100 I DON'T THINK SO. 1464 01:08:14,100 --> 01:08:16,167 AND DID HE TELL YOU THAT YOU NEED TO BE EXERCISING? 1465 01:08:16,167 --> 01:08:18,300 OR WAS IT JUST ABOUT THE FOOD RIGHT NOW? 1466 01:08:18,300 --> 01:08:20,233 NO, HE TOLD ME I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE EXERCISING. 1467 01:08:20,233 --> 01:08:21,667 WELL, I BET THERE'S A LOT OF THINGS 1468 01:08:21,667 --> 01:08:23,267 WE CAN DO HERE, IN THE APARTMENT, 1469 01:08:23,267 --> 01:08:25,600 THAT WOULD BE SIMPLE EXERCISES 1470 01:08:25,600 --> 01:08:26,867 THAT PROBABLY AREN'T TOO HARD. 1471 01:08:26,867 --> 01:08:28,700 IT'S HARD BECAUSE I HATE THE FACT 1472 01:08:28,700 --> 01:08:30,633 THAT I'M NOT MOBILE ANYMORE, 1473 01:08:30,633 --> 01:08:32,300 THAT I CAN'T WALK AROUND 1474 01:08:32,300 --> 01:08:34,433 AND DO ALL THE STUFF WE USED TO DO. 1475 01:08:34,433 --> 01:08:35,867 YOU MISSED JOHN'S WEDDING. 1476 01:08:35,867 --> 01:08:36,933 I KNOW. 1477 01:08:36,933 --> 01:08:39,533 AND YOU MISSED... MY GRADUATIONS. 1478 01:08:39,533 --> 01:08:42,700 AND, YOU KNOW, YOU'RE MY AUNT. 1479 01:08:42,700 --> 01:08:47,100 LIKE, AND I'M SAD THAT WE DIDN'T HAVE THAT. 1480 01:08:47,100 --> 01:08:50,733 [ Voice breaking ] I JUST WANT YOU, SO MUCH, TO EXPERIENCE... 1481 01:08:50,733 --> 01:08:52,733 MY WEDDING SOME DAY, AND MIKE'S WEDDING, 1482 01:08:52,733 --> 01:08:55,433 AND THE MUELLER BOYS -- THEIR GRADUATIONS. 1483 01:08:55,433 --> 01:08:57,400 I MEAN, YOU'RE OUR AUNT. LIKE, THAT'S WHAT WE WANT. 1484 01:08:57,400 --> 01:08:58,967 YOU THERE FOR THERE FOR THOSE FUN THINGS. 1485 01:08:58,967 --> 01:09:02,467 AND WE HAVEN'T GOTTEN TO HAVE YOU FOR THAT. 1486 01:09:02,467 --> 01:09:04,533 Rachel: AUNT JAN TAKING THIS JOURNEY IS A REALLY BIG STEP, 1487 01:09:04,533 --> 01:09:06,467 AND I FELT LIKE IT WAS REALLY IMPORTANT 1488 01:09:06,467 --> 01:09:08,200 TO LET HER KNOW THAT SHE'S LOVED 1489 01:09:08,200 --> 01:09:09,700 AND THAT WE SUPPORT HER 100%, 1490 01:09:09,700 --> 01:09:11,233 BUT ALSO TO HOLD HER ACCOUNTABLE. 1491 01:09:11,233 --> 01:09:13,200 YOU READY FOR SOME EXERCISES? 1492 01:09:13,200 --> 01:09:14,533 SURE, WHY NOT. 1493 01:09:14,533 --> 01:09:17,700 OKAY, I THINK MAYBE IF YOU'RE LIKE LAYING DOWN, 1494 01:09:17,700 --> 01:09:19,833 AND THEN WE CAN SIT UP, WE'LL DO FIVE OF THOSE. 1495 01:09:19,833 --> 01:09:20,800 -ALL RIGHT. -WHAT DO YOU THINK? 1496 01:09:20,800 --> 01:09:23,067 AND I'LL BE HERE. -I CAN DO THAT. 1497 01:09:23,067 --> 01:09:27,667 Rachel: PHYSICALLY, I'VE NEVER SEEN HER IN SUCH BAD SHAPE. 1498 01:09:27,667 --> 01:09:30,900 I WORRY THAT SHE'S GONNA FALL OUT OF HER BED 1499 01:09:30,900 --> 01:09:32,533 AND NOT BE ABLE TO GET HELP. 1500 01:09:32,533 --> 01:09:35,633 I WORRY ABOUT HER RUNNING INTO A SITUATION 1501 01:09:35,633 --> 01:09:37,333 WHERE HER SCOOTER ISN'T WORKING ANYMORE 1502 01:09:37,333 --> 01:09:39,300 AND SHE HAS NO ONE TO HELP HER. 1503 01:09:39,300 --> 01:09:41,600 AND SO THERE'S A LOT OF CONCERNS, 1504 01:09:41,600 --> 01:09:43,133 JUST ABOUT HER PHYSICAL SAFETY 1505 01:09:43,133 --> 01:09:46,400 AND ABOUT HER DAY-TO-DAY LIFE RIGHT NOW. 1506 01:09:46,400 --> 01:09:48,367 -OKAY, READY TO GO AGAIN? -YEP. 1507 01:09:48,367 --> 01:09:51,900 PUT A WATER BOTTLE IN EACH HAND. 1508 01:09:51,900 --> 01:09:54,567 SO WE'LL DO OUR ARMS UP. 1509 01:09:54,567 --> 01:09:57,733 Janine: I SEE DR. NOW IN ONE MONTH, 1510 01:09:57,733 --> 01:10:01,533 AND I GET HOW IMPORTANT IT IS FOR ME TO HIT HIS GOAL. 1511 01:10:01,533 --> 01:10:03,400 AND IF I DON'T QUALIFY THIS NEXT TIME, 1512 01:10:03,400 --> 01:10:05,567 THEN I KNOW THAT THERE'S A GOOD CHANCE 1513 01:10:05,567 --> 01:10:09,400 DR. NOW WILL TELL ME THERE'S NOTHING HE CAN DO. 1514 01:10:09,400 --> 01:10:12,233 NICE JOB. 1515 01:10:12,233 --> 01:10:14,400 THANK YA. 1516 01:10:14,400 --> 01:10:24,367 ** 1517 01:10:24,367 --> 01:10:26,767 Janine: I KNOW HOW MUCH IS RIDING ON TODAY. 1518 01:10:26,767 --> 01:10:29,233 JANINE MUELLER? 1519 01:10:29,233 --> 01:10:32,100 ** 1520 01:10:32,100 --> 01:10:34,100 I NEED TO GET WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY. 1521 01:10:34,100 --> 01:10:36,400 ** 1522 01:10:36,400 --> 01:10:39,300 AND IT'S BEEN SUCH A HARD ROAD AND JOURNEY HERE. 1523 01:10:39,300 --> 01:10:41,167 ** 1524 01:10:41,167 --> 01:10:42,200 [ SIGHS ] 1525 01:10:42,200 --> 01:10:44,633 WE CAN DO THIS, GIRL. 1526 01:10:44,633 --> 01:10:46,067 BE NICE TO ME. 1527 01:10:49,233 --> 01:10:51,733 OKAY. 1528 01:10:51,733 --> 01:10:55,367 I CAN'T MESS IT UP AND LOSE EVERYTHING TODAY. 1529 01:10:55,367 --> 01:10:57,067 AND IF I DID, 1530 01:10:57,067 --> 01:10:59,600 I KNOW IT WILL BE A DEATH SENTENCE. 1531 01:10:59,600 --> 01:10:59,800 ** 1532 01:11:07,100 --> 01:11:13,900 ** 1533 01:11:13,900 --> 01:11:16,667 Janine: TODAY IS A BIG DAY FOR ME. 1534 01:11:16,667 --> 01:11:19,700 BECAUSE I WANT TO PROVE MYSELF TO DR. NOW. 1535 01:11:19,700 --> 01:11:22,067 HE TOLD ME THAT I NEEDED TO LOSE 50 POUNDS 1536 01:11:22,067 --> 01:11:23,900 OVER THE LAST TWO MONTHS, 1537 01:11:23,900 --> 01:11:26,200 SO I SHOULD BE 495 TODAY. 1538 01:11:26,333 --> 01:11:29,200 ** 1539 01:11:36,167 --> 01:11:38,067 GOD, THAT REALLY SUCKS. 1540 01:11:38,067 --> 01:11:40,067 ** 1541 01:11:40,067 --> 01:11:42,567 I GAINED SOME WEIGHT BACK, 1542 01:11:42,567 --> 01:11:45,367 AND I KNOW IT'S GONNA REALLY UPSET DR. NOWZARADAN. 1543 01:11:45,367 --> 01:11:47,833 I MAJORLY SCREWED UP, SO... 1544 01:11:47,833 --> 01:11:49,567 HE'S GOING TO BE VERY UNHAPPY. 1545 01:11:49,567 --> 01:11:52,933 ** 1546 01:11:52,933 --> 01:11:55,633 -HI, JANINE. -HI, DR. NOWZARADAN. 1547 01:11:55,633 --> 01:11:58,733 SO, WE PUT YOU IN THE HOSPITAL ON A CONTROLLED DIET 1548 01:11:58,733 --> 01:12:01,100 AND WE GOT YOUR WEIGHT DOWN TO 545. 1549 01:12:01,100 --> 01:12:02,167 MM-HMM. 1550 01:12:02,167 --> 01:12:04,833 AND NOW YOU'RE BACK OVER 600 POUNDS. 1551 01:12:04,833 --> 01:12:06,200 HOW DO YOU EXPLAIN THIS? 1552 01:12:06,200 --> 01:12:08,800 WELL, I DID NOT HAVE A GOOD WEEK THIS WEEK. 1553 01:12:08,800 --> 01:12:11,400 I THOUGHT I WAS DOING OKAY, BUT I CAME TO REALIZE 1554 01:12:11,400 --> 01:12:13,100 I MADE SOME BAD CHOICES. 1555 01:12:13,100 --> 01:12:15,400 BUT HERE'S MY CONCERN... 1556 01:12:15,400 --> 01:12:18,067 IN THE PAST TWO MONTHS, YOU HAVEN'T LOST ANY WEIGHT, 1557 01:12:18,067 --> 01:12:21,167 AND YOU STILL WON'T GET UP AND OUT OF YOUR SCOOTER. 1558 01:12:21,167 --> 01:12:24,667 SO TELL ME, WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH YOU NOW? 1559 01:12:24,667 --> 01:12:25,800 WHAT DO YOU WANT ME TO TELL YOU? 1560 01:12:25,800 --> 01:12:27,800 I'M TRYING TO SAY THAT, YOU KNOW, 1561 01:12:27,800 --> 01:12:31,267 I'M REALIZING THAT CHOICES I MADE WERE WRONG THIS WEEK. 1562 01:12:31,267 --> 01:12:32,767 DON'T GIVE ME THAT. 1563 01:12:32,767 --> 01:12:34,933 THAT'S JUST ANOTHER EXCUSE. 1564 01:12:34,933 --> 01:12:37,633 YOU SEEM TO HAVE NO DESIRE TO CHANGE, 1565 01:12:37,633 --> 01:12:39,567 DESPITE THE FACT THAT IT MEANS 1566 01:12:39,567 --> 01:12:41,100 THAT YOU'RE GOING TO DIE SOON. 1567 01:12:41,100 --> 01:12:42,900 SO WHAT IS WRONG THERE? CAN YOU TELL ME? 1568 01:12:42,900 --> 01:12:44,300 YES. 1569 01:12:44,300 --> 01:12:45,900 I DON'T FEEL WELL. 1570 01:12:45,900 --> 01:12:47,967 I DON'T FEEL HEALTHY, I DON'T FEEL WELL. 1571 01:12:47,967 --> 01:12:50,467 I HAVEN'T FELT WELL SINCE I'VE BEEN HERE. 1572 01:12:50,467 --> 01:12:53,533 OKAY, YOU'RE NOT FEELING WELL HERE 1573 01:12:53,533 --> 01:12:56,533 BECAUSE YOU'RE NOT EATING THE FOOD THAT YOU USED TO EAT, 1574 01:12:56,533 --> 01:12:58,933 THE SUGARY STUFF THAT YOU WANT TO EAT. 1575 01:12:58,933 --> 01:13:00,267 WHAT'S THE SOLUTION? 1576 01:13:00,267 --> 01:13:01,933 YOU WANT TO GO BACK TO EAT SUGAR AND FEEL GOOD? 1577 01:13:01,933 --> 01:13:03,667 NO, I DON'T. I DON'T. 1578 01:13:03,667 --> 01:13:06,233 THE REALITY IS, THE SCALE DOESN'T LIE. 1579 01:13:06,233 --> 01:13:07,433 PEOPLE DO. 1580 01:13:07,433 --> 01:13:09,200 AND THIS IS JUST SOMETHING THAT'S HAPPENING 1581 01:13:09,200 --> 01:13:10,700 OVER AND OVER AND OVER. 1582 01:13:10,700 --> 01:13:13,067 WE TRIED TO GET YOU TO UNDERSTAND WHAT'S THE PROBLEM, 1583 01:13:13,067 --> 01:13:15,500 WHAT'S THE SOLUTION. 1584 01:13:15,500 --> 01:13:17,600 "I'M NAUSEATED. I DON'T WANT TO EAT." 1585 01:13:17,600 --> 01:13:20,333 BUT THE REALITY IS, YOU'RE EATING SOME OTHER STUFF. 1586 01:13:20,333 --> 01:13:22,667 BECAUSE YOU DON'T WANT TO EAT THE HEALTHY STUFF. 1587 01:13:22,667 --> 01:13:25,833 YOU WANT TO EAT ALL THE JUNK FOOD THAT YOU USED TO. 1588 01:13:25,833 --> 01:13:27,633 AND THAT'S KILLING YOU. 1589 01:13:27,633 --> 01:13:29,533 OKAY, AS FAR AS I CAN SEE, 1590 01:13:29,533 --> 01:13:31,933 WE NEED TO TAKE A MORE EXTREME APPROACH 1591 01:13:31,933 --> 01:13:34,833 TO GET YOU GOING IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION. 1592 01:13:34,833 --> 01:13:37,133 THE ONLY OPTION I'M THINKING ABOUT... 1593 01:13:37,133 --> 01:13:41,700 MAYBE WE DO SOMETHING PHYSICALLY TO RESTRICT YOU FROM EATING. 1594 01:13:41,700 --> 01:13:44,800 AND ONE OPTION WOULD BE TO PUT A BALLOON IN THE STOMACH. 1595 01:13:44,800 --> 01:13:45,767 OH, DEAR LORD. 1596 01:13:45,767 --> 01:13:48,100 IT IS ONLY A TEMPORARY SOLUTION. 1597 01:13:48,100 --> 01:13:52,067 BUT IF I DON'T DO SOMETHING, YOU'RE GONNA BE DEAD SOON. 1598 01:13:52,067 --> 01:13:54,833 SO THIS IS THE ONLY OPTION. 1599 01:13:54,833 --> 01:13:56,867 THAT'S REALLY EXTREME. 1600 01:13:56,867 --> 01:13:59,667 THAT'S NOT AS EXTREME AS HAVING WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY. 1601 01:13:59,667 --> 01:14:02,367 YOU THINK BEING 600 POUNDS IS OKAY? 1602 01:14:02,367 --> 01:14:03,733 NO, I DON'T. 1603 01:14:03,733 --> 01:14:04,867 I DON'T. 1604 01:14:04,867 --> 01:14:06,467 DO YOU THINK YOUR BODY IS GONNA TOLERATE 1605 01:14:06,467 --> 01:14:08,567 BEING THIS WAY MUCH LONGER? 1606 01:14:08,567 --> 01:14:09,900 NO. NO. 1607 01:14:09,900 --> 01:14:14,300 BUT YOU WON'T CHANGE, AND THIS IS A LAST RESORT. 1608 01:14:14,300 --> 01:14:17,067 A BALLOON IS SOMETHING THAT PEOPLE SWALLOW DOWN, 1609 01:14:17,067 --> 01:14:20,667 GOES THROUGH, AND WE INFLATE IT WITH GAS. 1610 01:14:20,667 --> 01:14:21,667 JUST LIKE THAT. 1611 01:14:21,667 --> 01:14:23,267 STAYS INTO YOUR STOMACH. 1612 01:14:23,267 --> 01:14:25,900 TAKES THAT MUCH ROOM OUT OF YOUR STOMACH. 1613 01:14:25,900 --> 01:14:26,867 OKAY? 1614 01:14:26,867 --> 01:14:29,200 SO YOU'LL BE ABLE TO EAT LESS. 1615 01:14:29,200 --> 01:14:31,733 FOR THAT, WE NEED TO VERIFY THE BALLOON 1616 01:14:31,733 --> 01:14:34,467 GOING DOWN IN YOUR STOMACH SO WE'LL BE ABLE TO SEE. 1617 01:14:34,467 --> 01:14:35,667 SO WHAT I'M GONNA DO... 1618 01:14:35,667 --> 01:14:37,900 I'M GONNA DO A QUICK TEST ON YOU TO SEE 1619 01:14:37,900 --> 01:14:40,767 IF YOU EVEN HAVE THE CAPABILITY 1620 01:14:40,767 --> 01:14:43,900 OF SEEING THAT BALLOON WITH X-RAY, OKAY? 1621 01:14:43,900 --> 01:14:46,067 ALL RIGHT, JANINE, I WANT YOU TO COME WITH ME. 1622 01:14:46,067 --> 01:14:47,100 OKAY. 1623 01:14:47,100 --> 01:14:51,433 ** 1624 01:14:51,433 --> 01:14:52,400 GOING THAT WAY. 1625 01:14:52,400 --> 01:14:53,733 OKAY. 1626 01:14:53,733 --> 01:15:00,367 ** 1627 01:15:00,367 --> 01:15:02,100 Janine: I'M VERY OVERWHELMED RIGHT NOW. 1628 01:15:02,100 --> 01:15:04,267 I GUESS, YOU KNOW, MY ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES 1629 01:15:04,267 --> 01:15:06,900 AND THESE ARE THEM. 1630 01:15:06,900 --> 01:15:09,367 IT FEELS LIKE PUNISHMENT RIGHT NOW, HONESTLY, 1631 01:15:09,367 --> 01:15:13,533 BECAUSE IT'S THE CONSEQUENCES FOR WHAT I CHOSE TO DO. 1632 01:15:13,533 --> 01:15:17,167 SO, WHATEVER I NEED TO DO IS WHATEVER I NEED TO DO. 1633 01:15:17,167 --> 01:15:19,600 THIS IS NOT HOW I THOUGHT IT WAS GONNA GO. 1634 01:15:19,600 --> 01:15:21,400 ** 1635 01:15:21,400 --> 01:15:22,500 Dr. Nowzaradan: I THINK IT'S CLEAR 1636 01:15:22,500 --> 01:15:24,767 WITH JANINE'S RECENT WEIGHT GAIN, 1637 01:15:24,767 --> 01:15:26,400 THERE ARE SERIOUS ISSUES 1638 01:15:26,400 --> 01:15:28,800 THAT WE HAVE TO ADDRESS WITH HER. 1639 01:15:28,800 --> 01:15:30,900 SURGERY WOULD KILL HER RIGHT NOW. 1640 01:15:30,900 --> 01:15:35,200 SO A SHORT-TERM SOLUTION IS TO PUT A GASTRIC BALLOON 1641 01:15:35,200 --> 01:15:36,333 IN HER STOMACH 1642 01:15:36,333 --> 01:15:37,733 TO HELP HER EAT LESS 1643 01:15:37,733 --> 01:15:41,100 AND BE FULL AND LOSE WEIGHT. 1644 01:15:41,100 --> 01:15:45,400 BECAUSE RIGHT NOW, THE PRIORITY IS STOPPING HER WEIGHT GAIN 1645 01:15:45,400 --> 01:15:47,967 SO SHE DOESN'T KILL HERSELF. 1646 01:15:47,967 --> 01:15:53,067 ** 1647 01:15:53,067 --> 01:15:55,267 OKAY, JANINE, WE HAVE AN ISSUE. 1648 01:15:55,267 --> 01:15:58,100 YOU HAVE TOO MUCH FAT AROUND YOUR ABDOMEN 1649 01:15:58,100 --> 01:16:02,133 FOR THE X-RAY TO PENETRATE TO BE ABLE TO SEE YOUR STOMACH. 1650 01:16:02,133 --> 01:16:04,233 BECAUSE IF IT IS IN YOUR ESOPHAGUS 1651 01:16:04,233 --> 01:16:07,833 AND I INFLATE IT, IT WILL KILL YOU. 1652 01:16:07,833 --> 01:16:09,233 WELL... 1653 01:16:09,233 --> 01:16:12,900 BUT THERE ARE MORE POWERFUL X-RAY MACHINES AT THE HOSPITAL, 1654 01:16:12,900 --> 01:16:16,300 SO I'M SCHEDULING TIME FOR YOU TO GO THERE TOMORROW, 1655 01:16:16,300 --> 01:16:18,333 AND, HOPEFULLY, WE CAN DO IT THERE. 1656 01:16:18,333 --> 01:16:19,333 OKAY. 1657 01:16:19,333 --> 01:16:20,900 AND IF YOU DON'T DO THIS, 1658 01:16:20,900 --> 01:16:23,100 YOU'RE NOT GOING TO LIVE MUCH LONGER. 1659 01:16:23,100 --> 01:16:25,467 SO I EXPECT TO SEE YOU THERE. 1660 01:16:25,467 --> 01:16:26,967 ALL RIGHT, JANINE, YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO MAKE 1661 01:16:26,967 --> 01:16:28,167 THOSE CHANGES, OKAY? 1662 01:16:28,167 --> 01:16:29,367 YES, SIR. YES, SIR. 1663 01:16:29,367 --> 01:16:30,633 ALL RIGHT, I'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW. 1664 01:16:30,633 --> 01:16:31,633 OKAY, THANK YOU. 1665 01:16:31,633 --> 01:16:32,667 ALL RIGHT. 1666 01:16:32,667 --> 01:16:37,267 ** 1667 01:16:37,267 --> 01:16:41,200 I'M CONCERNED THAT JANINE WON'T SHOW UP TOMORROW. 1668 01:16:41,200 --> 01:16:44,067 BECAUSE SHE DOESN'T WANT TO GIVE UP HER EATING HABITS, 1669 01:16:44,067 --> 01:16:46,733 AND IF SHE DOES, THERE'S A GOOD CHANCE 1670 01:16:46,733 --> 01:16:48,467 I MAY NEVER SEE HER AGAIN. 1671 01:16:48,467 --> 01:16:51,367 ** 1672 01:16:51,367 --> 01:16:52,467 Janine: I HAVE A LOT OF WORK TO DO, 1673 01:16:52,467 --> 01:16:54,567 AND I KNOW THAT -- 1674 01:16:54,567 --> 01:16:57,067 A LOT. 1675 01:16:57,067 --> 01:17:01,567 AND I HAVEN'T BEEN DOING ALL THE WORK I NEED TO DO. 1676 01:17:01,567 --> 01:17:03,867 ** 1677 01:17:09,100 --> 01:17:10,367 I JUST FEEL LIKE, YOU KNOW, 1678 01:17:10,367 --> 01:17:12,733 I WISH SOMEONE WOULD JUST CUT ME A LITTLE BREAK. 1679 01:17:12,733 --> 01:17:22,067 ** 1680 01:17:22,067 --> 01:17:31,267 ** 1681 01:17:31,267 --> 01:17:34,067 I'M PROUD OF JANINE FOR COMING TODAY, 1682 01:17:34,067 --> 01:17:37,700 BECAUSE THIS IS HER LAST CHANCE TO GET HELP FROM US. 1683 01:17:37,700 --> 01:17:40,867 AND WE HAVE MORE OPTIONS HERE AT THE HOSPITAL 1684 01:17:40,867 --> 01:17:43,667 TO FIND A WAY TO SEE INTO HER STOMACH 1685 01:17:43,667 --> 01:17:46,767 SO WE CAN ACTIVATE THE BALLOON. 1686 01:17:46,767 --> 01:17:50,600 BUT THERE IS A LARGE AMOUNT OF FAT AROUND HER ABDOMEN 1687 01:17:50,600 --> 01:17:55,600 THAT STILL MAY BE TOO BIG FOR ANY MACHINE TO SEE THROUGH. 1688 01:17:55,600 --> 01:17:57,933 AND IF THAT IS THE SITUATION, 1689 01:17:57,933 --> 01:18:00,333 THEN THERE IS NO WAY TO SAFELY 1690 01:18:00,333 --> 01:18:03,867 PUT A BALLOON IN JANINE'S STOMACH, 1691 01:18:03,867 --> 01:18:07,900 AND WE MAY BE COMPLETELY OUT OF OPTIONS TO HELP HER. 1692 01:18:10,067 --> 01:18:11,300 I'M SORRY. 1693 01:18:21,467 --> 01:18:23,533 Man: THAT'S AS FAR AS IT GOES. 1694 01:18:23,533 --> 01:18:27,167 Dr. Nowzaradan: OKAY. SIT STILL FOR A MOMENT. 1695 01:18:27,167 --> 01:18:31,200 THIS IS NOT WORKING. 1696 01:18:31,200 --> 01:18:33,100 WE CAN'T SEE ANYTHING. 1697 01:18:33,100 --> 01:18:36,133 OKAY, JANINE, WE NEED TO LAY YOU DOWN 1698 01:18:36,133 --> 01:18:37,733 AND TRY IT THAT WAY. 1699 01:18:37,733 --> 01:18:39,967 ** 1700 01:18:39,967 --> 01:18:47,067 [BLEEP]. 1701 01:18:47,067 --> 01:18:48,533 YEAH. 1702 01:18:48,533 --> 01:18:51,533 ** 1703 01:18:51,533 --> 01:18:52,700 OKAY, I'LL DO IT. 1704 01:18:59,433 --> 01:19:05,233 ** 1705 01:19:05,233 --> 01:19:06,367 AND LIFT. 1706 01:19:06,367 --> 01:19:08,067 THERE YOU GO. 1707 01:19:08,067 --> 01:19:10,633 OH, THANK YOU! -YOU'RE GONNA BE ALL RIGHT. 1708 01:19:10,633 --> 01:19:11,933 Dr. Nowzaradan: IF YOU JUST LAY LIKE THAT, 1709 01:19:11,933 --> 01:19:13,733 WE CAN WORK WITH YOU LIKE THAT. 1710 01:19:13,733 --> 01:19:15,267 [ SOBBING ] 1711 01:19:15,267 --> 01:19:24,567 ** 1712 01:19:24,567 --> 01:19:26,833 YEAH, I CAN SEE THOSE. 1713 01:19:29,067 --> 01:19:30,233 ALL RIGHT, SUPER. 1714 01:19:32,767 --> 01:19:36,067 SO, THIS IS THE CAPSULE, BUT IT'S CONNECTED TO TUBING. 1715 01:19:36,067 --> 01:19:38,267 -OKAY. -AND SO WE'RE GONNA WET IT, 1716 01:19:38,267 --> 01:19:40,100 AND IN GOES THE... 1717 01:19:40,100 --> 01:19:41,300 JUST SWALLOW. 1718 01:19:41,300 --> 01:19:46,700 ** 1719 01:19:46,700 --> 01:19:52,100 ** 1720 01:19:52,100 --> 01:19:53,333 ALL RIGHT. 1721 01:19:53,333 --> 01:19:57,867 ** 1722 01:19:57,867 --> 01:20:00,867 [ GROANS, BELCHES ] 1723 01:20:00,867 --> 01:20:02,333 [BLEEP]. OKAY. 1724 01:20:02,333 --> 01:20:04,133 THAT'S COMING IN AS FAR AS... 1725 01:20:04,133 --> 01:20:06,433 SEE IF WE CAN SEE THE CAPSULE. 1726 01:20:06,433 --> 01:20:11,900 ** 1727 01:20:11,900 --> 01:20:17,367 ** 1728 01:20:17,367 --> 01:20:19,533 COME ON UP A LITTLE BIT. 1729 01:20:19,533 --> 01:20:23,700 AND CAN YOU TAKE A DEEP BREATH AND HOLD IT? 1730 01:20:23,700 --> 01:20:24,967 FOLLOW IT DOWN. 1731 01:20:24,967 --> 01:20:27,033 ** 1732 01:20:27,033 --> 01:20:28,833 I'D SAY THIS IS A LITTLE BIT HIGHER 1733 01:20:28,833 --> 01:20:30,700 THAN IT SHOULD BE, HUH? 1734 01:20:30,700 --> 01:20:33,033 YOU DOING OKAY? 1735 01:20:33,033 --> 01:20:35,933 AND THE BALLOON IS NOW DOWN THERE. 1736 01:20:38,867 --> 01:20:39,867 [ RETCHES ] 1737 01:20:39,867 --> 01:20:41,267 YOU DID IT. 1738 01:20:41,267 --> 01:20:44,033 THE PROCURE WAS A SUCCESS TODAY. 1739 01:20:44,033 --> 01:20:46,533 BUT THIS IS ONLY A SHORT-TERM SOLUTION, 1740 01:20:46,533 --> 01:20:50,900 BECAUSE WE'RE ONLY ABLE TO LEAVE IT IN FOR SIX MONTHS. 1741 01:20:50,900 --> 01:20:54,833 BUT THIS WILL BUY US SOME TIME AND PHYSICALLY RESTRAIN JANINE 1742 01:20:54,833 --> 01:20:57,600 FROM OVER-EATING AND KILLING HERSELF 1743 01:20:57,600 --> 01:20:59,633 IN THE NEAR FUTURE. 1744 01:20:59,633 --> 01:21:03,067 JANINE HAS, PRACTICALLY, WASTED THE WHOLE YEAR. 1745 01:21:03,067 --> 01:21:05,700 IF SHE DOESN'T DO WHAT SHE'S SUPPOSED TO DO 1746 01:21:05,700 --> 01:21:08,500 AND START MAKING THE PROGRESS SHE NEEDS, 1747 01:21:08,500 --> 01:21:11,533 THEN WE'RE OUT OF OPTIONS WITH HER. 1748 01:21:11,533 --> 01:21:15,167 BUT, HOPEFULLY, THIS PROCEDURE IS GOING TO BE THE START 1749 01:21:15,167 --> 01:21:17,900 OF TURNING THINGS AROUND FOR HER. 1750 01:21:17,900 --> 01:21:19,333 ** 1751 01:21:22,433 --> 01:21:29,067 ** 1752 01:21:29,067 --> 01:21:35,633 ** 1753 01:21:35,633 --> 01:21:42,233 ** 1754 01:21:42,233 --> 01:21:44,533 OH, GEEZ. 1755 01:21:44,533 --> 01:21:46,733 OH, GOD. 1756 01:21:46,733 --> 01:21:49,067 I'LL TELL YOU, IT'S NOT PRETTY. 1757 01:21:49,067 --> 01:21:50,467 AW. 1758 01:21:50,467 --> 01:21:51,900 DOES THAT FEEL BETTER? 1759 01:21:51,900 --> 01:21:54,067 KNEES FEEL BETTER. TUMMY DOES NOT FEEL BETTER. 1760 01:21:54,067 --> 01:21:55,367 [ SIGHS ] 1761 01:21:55,367 --> 01:21:56,633 JUST HAVE A SEAT WHEREVER AND... 1762 01:21:56,633 --> 01:21:57,667 OKAY, I'LL SIT ON THE FLOOR. 1763 01:21:57,667 --> 01:21:58,700 OKAY. 1764 01:21:59,900 --> 01:22:02,333 SO, HOW HAVE YOU BEEN FEELING THE LAST COUPLE WEEKS? 1765 01:22:02,333 --> 01:22:03,933 WELL, I'VE BEEN PRETTY NAUSEOUS, 1766 01:22:03,933 --> 01:22:06,400 AND THEN GETTING THIS BALLOON THING IMPLANTED 1767 01:22:06,400 --> 01:22:08,433 HAS LIKE INCREASED IT TIMES 10. 1768 01:22:08,433 --> 01:22:11,233 I'M JUST LIKE... OH, MY GOD. 1769 01:22:11,233 --> 01:22:13,167 I MEAN, IMAGINE THE WORST INDIGESTION 1770 01:22:13,167 --> 01:22:14,700 YOU'VE EVER HAD IN YOUR LIFE. 1771 01:22:14,700 --> 01:22:17,100 TO BE HONEST, I JUST FEEL THE BEAT DOWN, I REALLY DO. 1772 01:22:17,100 --> 01:22:22,433 I JUST FEEL SO BEATEN DOWN, LIKE I'M JUST NEVER GONNA WIN. 1773 01:22:22,433 --> 01:22:25,633 SO, WHEN I HEAR YOU TALKING ABOUT BEATEN DOWN, 1774 01:22:25,633 --> 01:22:27,567 IT BREAKS MY HEART, YOU KNOW, 1775 01:22:27,567 --> 01:22:29,400 AND IT MAKES ME REALLY SAD THAT YOU'RE -- 1776 01:22:29,400 --> 01:22:30,667 -SORRY. -IT'S OKAY. 1777 01:22:30,667 --> 01:22:32,500 YOU DON'T HAVE TO APOLOGIZE TO ME FOR THAT, AUNT JAN. 1778 01:22:32,500 --> 01:22:34,167 IT'S OKAY. 1779 01:22:34,167 --> 01:22:35,333 I JUST WANT TO BE HONEST. 1780 01:22:35,333 --> 01:22:37,100 I'M SAD THAT YOU'RE AT THIS PLACE, 1781 01:22:37,100 --> 01:22:40,167 AND I'M SORRY THAT IT'S HARD. 1782 01:22:40,167 --> 01:22:43,067 BUT YOU DON'T HAVE TO APOLOGIZE TO ME FOR BEING BEATEN DOWN. 1783 01:22:43,067 --> 01:22:46,233 YOU ONLY HAVE TO APOLOGIZE TO ME IF YOU START NOT TRYING 1784 01:22:46,233 --> 01:22:48,300 AND WHEN YOU STOP CARING ABOUT IT. 1785 01:22:48,300 --> 01:22:50,567 AND I KNOW YOU DON'T NOT CARE, 1786 01:22:50,567 --> 01:22:53,667 BUT I NEED YOU TO STAY IN TRENCHES 1787 01:22:53,667 --> 01:22:55,333 AND I NEED YOU TO FIGHT BACK. 1788 01:22:55,333 --> 01:22:57,100 BECAUSE YOU'RE THE ONLY PERSON THAT CAN. 1789 01:22:57,100 --> 01:22:58,533 I KNOW. 1790 01:23:00,167 --> 01:23:02,067 [ SIGHS ] 1791 01:23:02,067 --> 01:23:05,900 YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE VERY IMPORTANT TO ME, 1792 01:23:05,900 --> 01:23:09,433 AND I NEED YOU TO BE THERE. 1793 01:23:09,433 --> 01:23:11,133 I NEED YOU TO BE IN MY LIFE 1794 01:23:11,133 --> 01:23:15,100 ON MORE THAN A BASIS WHERE OUR LIFE REVOLVES AROUND 1795 01:23:15,100 --> 01:23:17,733 YOU NEEDING TO GET YOUR WEIGHT UNDER CONTROL. 1796 01:23:17,733 --> 01:23:20,200 WE'RE NOT LIVING THE LIFE THAT WE SHOULD LIVE. 1797 01:23:20,200 --> 01:23:22,133 -I KNOW. -IT MEANT SO MUCH TO ME 1798 01:23:22,133 --> 01:23:24,233 ONCE I FOUND OUT YOU WERE WILLING TO DO THIS. 1799 01:23:24,233 --> 01:23:27,067 BECAUSE I KNEW THAT YOU'RE NOT JUST DOING IT 1800 01:23:27,067 --> 01:23:28,433 FOR A BETTER LIFE FOR YOU, 1801 01:23:28,433 --> 01:23:30,367 BUT YOU'RE DOING IT FOR A BETTER LIFE 1802 01:23:30,367 --> 01:23:33,267 FOR ALL OF US AND OUR RELATIONSHIP WITH YOU. 1803 01:23:33,267 --> 01:23:34,767 OH, YEAH. FOR SURE. 1804 01:23:34,767 --> 01:23:35,967 YOU KNOW, I MEAN, I HATE THE FACT 1805 01:23:35,967 --> 01:23:37,700 THAT I'M NOT ABLE TO GO 1806 01:23:37,700 --> 01:23:39,900 AND BE WITH ALL OF YOU AND, YOU KNOW, 1807 01:23:39,900 --> 01:23:42,067 BE AT THESE DIFFERENT FAMILY EVENTS AND... 1808 01:23:42,067 --> 01:23:43,467 WELL, AND WE NEED YOU THERE. 1809 01:23:43,467 --> 01:23:45,400 LIKE WE JUST NEED YOU AT THESE THINGS 1810 01:23:45,400 --> 01:23:47,300 BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE I'VE MISSED OUT 1811 01:23:47,300 --> 01:23:50,633 ON [ Voice breaking ] SOME OF OUR FAMILY'S LIFE 1812 01:23:50,633 --> 01:23:52,267 BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW THEM. 1813 01:23:52,267 --> 01:23:54,233 YEAH. I KNOW. AND MY MOM DOESN'T KNOW THEM. 1814 01:23:54,233 --> 01:23:55,767 SHE NEVER KNEW GRANDMA. 1815 01:23:55,767 --> 01:23:56,967 NO, SHE DIDN'T. BUT YOU DID, 1816 01:23:56,967 --> 01:24:01,267 AND YOU'VE BEEN GONE AND SO WE NEED YOU THERE. 1817 01:24:01,267 --> 01:24:02,933 WE JUST NEED YOU THERE. 1818 01:24:02,933 --> 01:24:04,067 I'M SORRY, HONEY. 1819 01:24:04,067 --> 01:24:07,067 OKAY. 1820 01:24:07,067 --> 01:24:10,533 I'M SO SORRY. 1821 01:24:10,533 --> 01:24:13,067 I'M SORRY, RACHEL. 1822 01:24:13,067 --> 01:24:14,533 SORRY, I JUST NEED A SECOND. 1823 01:24:14,533 --> 01:24:15,533 NO. 1824 01:24:15,533 --> 01:24:16,867 I'M SORRY. 1825 01:24:16,867 --> 01:24:24,167 ** 1826 01:24:24,167 --> 01:24:28,133 SOME OF MY LIFE FEELS LIKE IT'S BEEN TAKEN FROM ME. 1827 01:24:28,133 --> 01:24:30,100 I NEVER KNEW MY GRANDMA. 1828 01:24:30,100 --> 01:24:35,700 AND SOMETIMES I GET REALLY ANGRY THAT MY AUNT KNOWS HER 1829 01:24:35,700 --> 01:24:37,067 AND SHE'S NOT THERE, 1830 01:24:37,067 --> 01:24:41,367 RECOUNTING STORIES OF OUR FAMILY ALL TOGETHER. 1831 01:24:41,367 --> 01:24:45,433 AND I DON'T THINK SHE REALIZES 1832 01:24:45,433 --> 01:24:49,067 HOW IMPORTANT SHE IS. 1833 01:24:49,067 --> 01:24:51,100 GAINING WEIGHT IS HER OWN FORM OF SUICIDE, 1834 01:24:51,100 --> 01:24:53,700 AND SHE'S GONNA DIE, 1835 01:24:53,700 --> 01:24:57,567 AND I CAN'T GO THROUGH THAT WITH HER. 1836 01:24:57,567 --> 01:24:59,267 AND SO SHE HAS TO FIX SOMETHING. 1837 01:24:59,267 --> 01:25:01,133 SHE HAS TO GET BETTER. 1838 01:25:01,133 --> 01:25:03,833 ** 1839 01:25:03,833 --> 01:25:06,833 Janine: I KNOW I HAVE A LOT TO LIVE FOR, 1840 01:25:06,833 --> 01:25:09,467 AND I NEED TO TRY A LOT HARDER. 1841 01:25:09,467 --> 01:25:13,433 I VOW NOT TO WASTE THIS CHANCE LIKE I HAVE. 1842 01:25:13,433 --> 01:25:16,567 I KNOW I HAVE TO MAKE THIS NEXT YEAR COUNT. 1843 01:25:16,567 --> 01:25:18,067 BECAUSE IF I DON'T, 1844 01:25:18,067 --> 01:25:19,600 THEN I KNOW I'M GOING TO LOSE EVERYTHING 1845 01:25:19,600 --> 01:25:21,067 I HAVE TO LIVE FOR, 1846 01:25:21,067 --> 01:25:22,700 AND I'M GOING TO LET DOWN THE PEOPLE 1847 01:25:22,700 --> 01:25:24,667 I CARE ABOUT MOST. 1848 01:25:24,667 --> 01:25:26,700 SORRY, I JUST... 1849 01:25:26,700 --> 01:25:27,767 I LOVE YOU. 1850 01:25:27,767 --> 01:25:30,100 I LOVE YOU TOO. 1851 01:25:30,100 --> 01:25:31,500 I'M SO SORRY. 1852 01:25:31,900 --> 01:25:32,400 ** 1852 01:25:33,305 --> 01:26:33,694 Do you want subtitles for any video? -=[ ai.OpenSubtitles.com ]=-