"My 600-lb Life: Where Are They Now?" Nicole and Ashley D.

1 00:00:03,620 --> 00:00:07,448 ♪♪ 2 00:00:07,448 --> 00:00:11,931 Woman: SOME DAYS, I FEEL LIKE A TICKING TIME BOMB. 3 00:00:11,931 --> 00:00:13,620 Woman #2: I'M JUST HORRIFIED BY WHAT I LOOK LIKE. 4 00:00:13,620 --> 00:00:16,241 IT'S JUST A BLOB OF FAT. 5 00:00:16,241 --> 00:00:19,241 Woman #3: WHEN I LOOK IN THE MIRROR, I SEE A MONSTER. 6 00:00:19,241 --> 00:00:21,793 Nicole: I HAVE TO BE CLEANED OUTSIDE LIKE AN ANIMAL, 7 00:00:21,793 --> 00:00:24,000 AND IT'S VERY EMBARRASSING. 8 00:00:26,724 --> 00:00:29,000 Woman #4: I KNOW I DON'T HAVE MUCH TIME LEFT 9 00:00:29,000 --> 00:00:31,310 IF I DON'T TAKE DRASTIC ACTION. 10 00:00:31,310 --> 00:00:34,655 -I LOVE YOU. -LOVE YOU, TOO. 11 00:00:34,655 --> 00:00:44,689 ♪♪ 12 00:00:44,689 --> 00:00:47,551 Woman #5: I FEEL LIKE I'M TAKING BACK CONTROL OF MY LIFE. 13 00:00:47,551 --> 00:00:49,000 LOOK AT THAT. 14 00:00:49,000 --> 00:00:50,000 Woman #6: IT JUST GIVES ME MOTIVATION TO MOVE FORWARD, 15 00:00:50,000 --> 00:00:52,068 TO KNOW THAT I CAN DO THIS. 16 00:00:52,068 --> 00:00:54,655 Man: I FEEL GREAT. EVERY DAY IS SOMETHING NEW. 17 00:00:58,206 --> 00:00:59,517 Nicole: I FOUND A NEW LIFE, 18 00:00:59,517 --> 00:01:02,482 AND I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE WHERE IT TAKES ME NEXT. 19 00:01:02,482 --> 00:01:05,448 Woman #7: I'M THANKFUL AND EXCITED ABOUT THE FUTURE. 20 00:01:05,448 --> 00:01:08,793 Man #2: I'VE GOT MY LIFE BACK, AND I'M NEVER GIVING IT BACK UP. 21 00:01:12,137 --> 00:01:13,931 Woman #8: IF I CAN KEEP GOING LIKE THIS, 22 00:01:13,931 --> 00:01:15,793 I KNOW I CAN GET TO WHERE I NEED TO BE. 23 00:01:15,793 --> 00:01:19,724 --Captions by VITAC-- www.vitac.com 24 00:01:19,724 --> 00:01:23,655 CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY DISCOVERY COMMUNICATIONS 25 00:01:23,655 --> 00:01:26,586 Ashley: THERE'S NOT A DAY THAT GOES BY THAT I DON'T HAVE PAIN. 26 00:01:26,586 --> 00:01:30,827 [ Crying ] MY WEIGHT HAS MADE IT ALMOST UNBEARABLE TO GET AROUND. 27 00:01:30,827 --> 00:01:33,655 I DON'T WANT MY HUSBAND TO HAVE TO BURY ME, 28 00:01:33,655 --> 00:01:36,655 AND IF I KEEP GOING, THAT'S WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN. 29 00:01:36,655 --> 00:01:43,448 ♪♪ 30 00:01:43,448 --> 00:01:45,206 [ Normal voice ] GO GET THE BLUE BUCKET FOR MAMA. 31 00:01:45,206 --> 00:01:47,344 EVERYTHING THAT INVOLVES STANDING 32 00:01:47,344 --> 00:01:52,068 AND WALKING AROUND A LOT, PATRICK DOES FOR ME. 33 00:01:52,068 --> 00:01:53,827 Patrick: IT'S HARD FOR HER TO WALK, 34 00:01:53,827 --> 00:01:57,000 SO I DO THE STUFF THAT SHE WANTS ME TO DO. 35 00:01:57,000 --> 00:01:59,310 Ashley: I JUST WANT TO BE A GOOD MOM. 36 00:01:59,310 --> 00:02:03,724 [ Crying ] BUT I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY I LET MYSELF GET THIS WAY. 37 00:02:03,724 --> 00:02:05,931 I NEED HELP. 38 00:02:05,931 --> 00:02:11,448 ♪♪ 39 00:02:11,448 --> 00:02:13,724 [ Normal voice ] THIS HAS POTENTIAL TO BE DEVASTATING 40 00:02:13,724 --> 00:02:16,517 OR ONE OF THE BEST THINGS TO HAPPEN IN MY LIFE. 41 00:02:16,517 --> 00:02:19,172 I JUST HOPE I DIDN'T WAIT TOO LONG. 42 00:02:19,172 --> 00:02:21,344 Dr. Nowzaradan: AT YOUR WEIGHT, EVERY PART OF YOUR BODY 43 00:02:21,344 --> 00:02:23,172 IS UNDER STRAIN JUST TO FUNCTION, 44 00:02:23,172 --> 00:02:24,896 SO YOU NEED TO START A NEW DIET 45 00:02:24,896 --> 00:02:29,034 TO LOSE 50 POUNDS OVER THE NEXT MONTH. 46 00:02:29,034 --> 00:02:32,344 THIS IS GONNA BE THE HARDEST THING I'VE DONE IN MY LIFE. 47 00:02:32,344 --> 00:02:34,034 I'M EATING A PIECE OF CHICKEN, 48 00:02:34,034 --> 00:02:36,793 AND JAKE'S EATING, YOU KNOW, A HAMBURGER. 49 00:02:36,793 --> 00:02:40,655 I WISH I HAD MORE OF MY HUSBAND'S SUPPORT. 50 00:02:40,655 --> 00:02:42,413 I'M REALLY SCARED RIGHT NOW. 51 00:02:42,413 --> 00:02:45,275 DR. NOWZARADAN WANTED ME TO GET UNDER 675. 52 00:02:45,275 --> 00:02:48,689 Woman: 667. 53 00:02:48,689 --> 00:02:50,827 I'M GO AHEAD AT THIS POINT AND APPROVE YOU 54 00:02:50,827 --> 00:02:52,655 FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY, 55 00:02:52,655 --> 00:02:54,206 SO HOW'S THAT SOUND TO YOU? 56 00:02:54,206 --> 00:02:55,517 GOOD. 57 00:02:55,517 --> 00:02:58,241 I LOVE YOU, MOMMY. 58 00:02:58,241 --> 00:02:59,655 Dr. Nowzaradan: TODAY WE'RE ATTEMPTING 59 00:02:59,655 --> 00:03:03,068 TO DO GASTRIC BYPASS ON ASHLEY. 60 00:03:03,068 --> 00:03:05,724 OKAY. WE'RE DONE. 61 00:03:05,724 --> 00:03:08,482 OVERALL, EVERYTHING WENT VERY WELL. 62 00:03:08,482 --> 00:03:10,517 Ashley: IT'S GETTING HARDER AND HARDER TO COPE, 63 00:03:10,517 --> 00:03:13,379 BUT I CAN'T GO BACK TO THE WAY I WAS. 64 00:03:13,379 --> 00:03:16,689 [ GAGS AND COUGHS ] 65 00:03:16,689 --> 00:03:19,931 Dr. Nowzaradan: RIGHT NOW I'M TAKING ASHLEY TO EMERGENCY SURGERY 66 00:03:19,931 --> 00:03:23,896 BECAUSE SHE MAY BE ABUSING HER PAIN MEDICATION. 67 00:03:23,896 --> 00:03:26,034 YEAH. LOOK WHERE THE ULCER. 68 00:03:26,034 --> 00:03:27,862 THAT'S GONNA BE BAD. 69 00:03:27,862 --> 00:03:29,379 Dr. Nowzaradan: WE HAVE HER STABLE NOW, 70 00:03:29,379 --> 00:03:33,448 BUT SHE USES SELF-DESTRUCTIVE WAYS TO COPE WITH HER EMOTIONS, 71 00:03:33,448 --> 00:03:36,034 AND THAT HAS TO STOP IMMEDIATELY. 72 00:03:36,034 --> 00:03:41,586 ♪♪ 73 00:03:41,586 --> 00:03:43,896 I WAS A PRODUCT OF SEXUAL ABUSE. 74 00:03:43,896 --> 00:03:45,482 I TURNED TO FOOD FOR COMFORT. 75 00:03:45,482 --> 00:03:48,586 -MM-HMM. -FOOD ALMOST KILLED ME. 76 00:03:48,586 --> 00:03:51,827 Ashley: I'VE BEEN WORKING HARD, TRYING TO DEAL WITH MY EMOTIONS 77 00:03:51,827 --> 00:03:53,724 INSTEAD OF RUNNING FROM THEM. 78 00:03:53,724 --> 00:03:56,724 SO YOU'RE DOWN 255 POUNDS. 79 00:03:56,724 --> 00:03:59,000 HOW DOES IT FEEL? -CRAZY. 80 00:03:59,000 --> 00:04:01,551 ASHLEY HAS MADE GREAT PROGRESS. 81 00:04:01,551 --> 00:04:04,241 Ashley: I'VE COME SO FAR IN THIS PAST YEAR. 82 00:04:04,241 --> 00:04:08,965 NOW I CAN BE A PART OF MY FAMILY AND GIVE BACK TO THEM 83 00:04:08,965 --> 00:04:11,517 INSTEAD OF THEM JUST TAKING CARE OF ME. 84 00:04:12,827 --> 00:04:14,896 I KNOW I STILL HAVE A LONG WAY TO GO, 85 00:04:14,896 --> 00:04:17,103 BUT I'M STARTING TO FEEL NORMAL AGAIN. 86 00:04:17,103 --> 00:04:21,068 THE ONLY DIFFICULTY I'M STARTING TO HAVE IS MY SAGGING SKIN, 87 00:04:21,068 --> 00:04:23,448 SO MY FOCUS RIGHT NOW IS LOSING ENOUGH WEIGHT 88 00:04:23,448 --> 00:04:25,689 FOR MY FIRST SKIN-REMOVAL SURGERY. 89 00:04:25,689 --> 00:04:32,379 ♪♪ 90 00:04:32,379 --> 00:04:37,275 I'M TRYING TO MENTALLY PREPARE MYSELF FOR THE WORST RIGHT NOW. 91 00:04:37,275 --> 00:04:39,034 Man: PRETTY UNDERWHELMING OVERALL. 92 00:04:39,034 --> 00:04:41,068 NOTHING SURGICAL, THAT'S FOR SURE. 93 00:04:41,068 --> 00:04:43,275 Dr. Nowzaradan: THERE'S NOTHING PHYSICALLY WRONG WITH YOU, 94 00:04:43,275 --> 00:04:46,379 SO WHAT THIS IS, IS YOUR BODY RESPONDING 95 00:04:46,379 --> 00:04:50,655 TO PSYCHOLOGICAL ISSUE FROM FEAR OR STRESS, 96 00:04:50,655 --> 00:04:53,379 SO WHAT WE NEED TO DO TO TREAT THIS 97 00:04:53,379 --> 00:04:57,068 IS TO GET YOU SOME PSYCHOLOGICAL HELP. 98 00:04:57,068 --> 00:05:00,689 BEING SEXUALLY ABUSED JUST KIND OF STARTED ALL THIS, I GUESS. 99 00:05:00,689 --> 00:05:04,724 [ Voice breaking ] RIGHT NOW I'M BATTLING SOMETHING THAT'S INSIDE, 100 00:05:04,724 --> 00:05:07,034 AND NOT EVERYBODY UNDERSTANDS THAT. 101 00:05:07,034 --> 00:05:09,275 I THINK IT WOULD BE REALLY GOOD TO TRACK YOUR MOODS. 102 00:05:09,275 --> 00:05:12,896 SO ANYTIME THOSE SELF-DEFEATING THOUGHTS START TO COME UP, 103 00:05:12,896 --> 00:05:15,068 ESPECIALLY AROUND BODY IMAGE, 104 00:05:15,068 --> 00:05:16,379 I WANT YOU TO WRITE THAT DOWN, 105 00:05:16,379 --> 00:05:18,344 AND THEN WE CAN DIRECTLY COUNTERACT THOSE THOUGHTS 106 00:05:18,344 --> 00:05:20,724 AND THOSE THEMES. 107 00:05:20,724 --> 00:05:23,896 Ashley: SO ALL I HAD TO LOSE TO GET DOWN UNDER 350 108 00:05:23,896 --> 00:05:28,172 AND QUALIFY FOR SKIN-REMOVAL SURGERY WAS 11 POUNDS. 109 00:05:28,172 --> 00:05:29,724 Woman: 395. 110 00:05:29,724 --> 00:05:32,482 I'M LITERALLY IN SHOCK RIGHT NOW. 111 00:05:32,482 --> 00:05:34,137 Dr. Nowzaradan: I NEED HER TO GET BACK ON TRACK 112 00:05:34,137 --> 00:05:37,206 BECAUSE ONCE THE WEIGHT GAIN START AGAIN, 113 00:05:37,206 --> 00:05:40,413 IT MAY BECOME OUT OF CONTROL. 114 00:05:40,413 --> 00:05:42,413 Ashley: MY GOAL IS TO GET BACK ON TRACK 115 00:05:42,413 --> 00:05:43,793 AND LOSE THE WEIGHT I NEED 116 00:05:43,793 --> 00:05:45,896 TO FINALLY GET APPROVED FOR SKIN SURGERY. 117 00:05:45,896 --> 00:05:49,275 NO MORE EXCUSES OR GIVING IN TO FEAR. 118 00:05:49,275 --> 00:05:50,689 I'M JUST HOPING I STARTED MY WEIGHT 119 00:05:50,689 --> 00:05:52,620 GOING BACK IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION. 120 00:05:52,620 --> 00:05:54,551 SO YOU'RE BACK ON RIGHT TRACK. 121 00:05:54,551 --> 00:05:56,034 YEAH. 122 00:05:56,034 --> 00:05:58,172 YOU DIDN'T GET SKIN-REMOVAL SURGERY THIS YEAR, 123 00:05:58,172 --> 00:06:00,827 BUT YOU WORKED THROUGH PSYCHOSOMATIC CONDITION. 124 00:06:00,827 --> 00:06:01,724 YEAH. 125 00:06:01,724 --> 00:06:03,586 AND YOU SEEM MOVING FORWARD, 126 00:06:03,586 --> 00:06:06,931 SO YOU SHOULD BE PROUD OF YOURSELF, BECAUSE I AM. 127 00:06:06,931 --> 00:06:08,965 Ashley: I HAVE DONE A LOT THIS YEAR, 128 00:06:08,965 --> 00:06:11,827 AND I'M NOT LETTING FEAR CONTROL ME ANY LONGER. 129 00:06:11,827 --> 00:06:14,172 I'M CHOOSING THE LIFE I WANT TO HAVE, 130 00:06:14,172 --> 00:06:16,758 AND NO MATTER WHAT, I'M GETTING THERE. 131 00:06:16,758 --> 00:06:24,310 ♪♪ 132 00:06:24,310 --> 00:06:31,862 ♪♪ 133 00:06:31,862 --> 00:06:33,896 IT'S BEEN TWO YEARS SINCE I STARTED THIS JOURNEY 134 00:06:33,896 --> 00:06:37,517 TO LOSE ALL MY EXCESS WEIGHT AND GET MY LIFE BACK, 135 00:06:37,517 --> 00:06:42,344 AND IT FEELS LIKE IT'S JUST BEEN SET BACK FOR ME SO FAR. 136 00:06:42,344 --> 00:06:44,896 BETWEEN PAINKILLERS CAUSING AN ULCER 137 00:06:44,896 --> 00:06:48,448 AND MY EMOTIONS SLOWING ME DOWN 138 00:06:48,448 --> 00:06:50,620 AND THEN HAVING TO GET EMERGENCY SURGERY 139 00:06:50,620 --> 00:06:54,758 TO HAVE MY GALLBLADDER OUT BECAUSE I HAD GALLSTONES, 140 00:06:54,758 --> 00:06:58,241 I JUST ENDED UP GIVING IN TO GAINING AGAIN 141 00:06:58,241 --> 00:07:00,482 AND THEN HAD TO GET BACK ON TRACK. 142 00:07:00,482 --> 00:07:03,689 ♪♪ 143 00:07:03,689 --> 00:07:06,517 BUT I FEEL LIKE I'M IN A MUCH BETTER PLACE NOW, 144 00:07:06,517 --> 00:07:08,586 AND AS OF MY LAST DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT, 145 00:07:08,586 --> 00:07:11,931 I WAS LOSING AGAIN, 146 00:07:11,931 --> 00:07:14,206 BUT EVEN THOUGH I'M STILL NOT WHERE I WANT TO BE, 147 00:07:14,206 --> 00:07:17,724 I REMIND MYSELF HOW FAR I'VE ALREADY COME. 148 00:07:17,724 --> 00:07:19,758 I'VE LOST 350 POUNDS ALREADY, 149 00:07:19,758 --> 00:07:23,137 AND MY LIFE IS COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. 150 00:07:23,137 --> 00:07:24,620 I CAN DO SO MUCH MORE 151 00:07:24,620 --> 00:07:27,310 THAN JUST SIT AROUND THE HOUSE WAITING TO EAT, 152 00:07:27,310 --> 00:07:30,068 AND I CAN DO SO MUCH ON MY OWN. 153 00:07:30,068 --> 00:07:31,931 BECAUSE MY HUSBAND DRIVES A TRUCK FOR A LIVING, 154 00:07:31,931 --> 00:07:34,137 HE'S ON THE ROAD MOST OF THE WEEK, 155 00:07:34,137 --> 00:07:36,482 AND WITH MY SON IN SCHOOL ALL DAY, 156 00:07:36,482 --> 00:07:38,965 I'M MOSTLY ON MY OWN NOW DURING THE DAY, 157 00:07:38,965 --> 00:07:42,413 SO I JUST TRY TO KEEP BUSY AND STAY ACTIVE. 158 00:07:42,413 --> 00:07:45,517 IT'S NOT OFTEN THAT WE'RE ALL TOGETHER RIGHT NOW, 159 00:07:45,517 --> 00:07:47,862 SO I'M MAKING SURE I DO WHAT I NEED ON MY OWN 160 00:07:47,862 --> 00:07:49,758 TO KEEP MY PROGRESS GOING 161 00:07:49,758 --> 00:07:52,724 AND TRY TO FINALLY GET APPROVED FOR EXCESS-SKIN REMOVAL 162 00:07:52,724 --> 00:07:55,103 BECAUSE IT'S GETTING REALLY BAD, 163 00:07:55,103 --> 00:07:58,103 AND IT'S REALLY PAINFUL ON MY BODY. 164 00:07:58,103 --> 00:08:00,689 MY STOMACH JUST HANGS IN FRONT OF MY THIGHS, 165 00:08:00,689 --> 00:08:05,068 AND THAT KEEPS ME FROM BEING ABLE TO EXERCISE PROPERLY. 166 00:08:05,068 --> 00:08:08,206 I CANNOT RUN. I CANNOT JOG. 167 00:08:08,206 --> 00:08:10,103 AFTER WALKING FOR LONG PERIODS OF TIME, 168 00:08:10,103 --> 00:08:14,620 BECAUSE IT'S JUST HANGING THERE, IT HURTS. 169 00:08:14,620 --> 00:08:16,793 I COMPARE IT A LOT TO HAVING, 170 00:08:16,793 --> 00:08:20,862 LIKE, A BALL AND CHAIN ON MY WAIST. 171 00:08:20,862 --> 00:08:23,413 [ Voice breaking ] HONESTLY, I STILL AM VERY SELF-CONSCIOUS, 172 00:08:23,413 --> 00:08:26,620 MORE SO NOW THAN I WAS BEFORE, 173 00:08:26,620 --> 00:08:28,689 BECAUSE BEFORE I WAS JUST FAT, 174 00:08:28,689 --> 00:08:31,586 AND NOW I'VE LOST ALL THIS WEIGHT, AND... 175 00:08:31,586 --> 00:08:35,655 ♪♪ 176 00:08:35,655 --> 00:08:36,965 [ Normal voice ] ...I WANT SKIN SURGERY. 177 00:08:36,965 --> 00:08:41,482 THAT'S, LIKE, TOP PRIORITY, 178 00:08:41,482 --> 00:08:44,172 SO I'M PUSHING MYSELF TO DO WHAT I NEED 179 00:08:44,172 --> 00:08:46,689 TO TRY AND LOSE AT LEAST ANOTHER 25 POUNDS 180 00:08:46,689 --> 00:08:49,137 BEFORE MY NEXT APPOINTMENT. 181 00:08:49,137 --> 00:08:50,689 IT WAS GONNA BE A MONTH, 182 00:08:50,689 --> 00:08:53,103 BUT IT'S BEEN RESCHEDULED TO A COUPLE OF MONTHS FROM NOW 183 00:08:53,103 --> 00:08:56,517 BECAUSE OUR FAMILY IS MOVING TO A BIGGER PLACE HERE SOON, 184 00:08:56,517 --> 00:08:58,965 AND I'M EXCITED ABOUT THAT, BUT IT MEANS 185 00:08:58,965 --> 00:09:01,379 I HAVE TO WAIT A LITTLE LONGER TO TRY AND GET SURGERY 186 00:09:01,379 --> 00:09:02,620 BECAUSE IT'S GONNA BE TOO MUCH 187 00:09:02,620 --> 00:09:06,034 TO TRY AND DO THAT AND GO SEE THE DOCTOR, 188 00:09:06,034 --> 00:09:07,655 SO I JUST HOPE I CAN STAY ON TRACK 189 00:09:07,655 --> 00:09:10,551 AND GET TO WHERE I NEED BY THEN, 190 00:09:10,551 --> 00:09:13,379 BUT IT'S A REALLY STRESSFUL TIME, 191 00:09:13,379 --> 00:09:16,137 AND MY FEAR IS THAT I'M NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO DO IT. 192 00:09:19,172 --> 00:09:21,379 BUT I'M REALLY TRYING. 193 00:09:21,379 --> 00:09:27,000 ♪♪ 194 00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:30,172 Nicole: EVERY DAY, I FEEL LIKE I'M DYING. 195 00:09:30,172 --> 00:09:35,103 MY BODY TREMBLES IN PAIN, AND IT NEVER ENDS. 196 00:09:35,103 --> 00:09:37,758 I CAN BARELY GET AROUND, AND I'VE GOTTEN SO BIG 197 00:09:37,758 --> 00:09:40,586 THAT I CAN'T FIT THROUGH THE BATHROOM DOOR ANYMORE, 198 00:09:40,586 --> 00:09:44,068 SO I BATHE OUTSIDE ON THE BACK PORCH. 199 00:09:44,068 --> 00:09:46,344 IT'S VERY EMBARRASSING, 200 00:09:46,344 --> 00:09:49,517 AND I'M SICK OF NOT BEING ABLE TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF. 201 00:09:49,517 --> 00:09:55,448 ♪♪ 202 00:09:55,448 --> 00:10:00,000 MY PARENTS LIVE WITH US TO HELP TAKE CARE OF ME AND MY TWO KIDS, 203 00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:03,655 BUT USUALLY, IT'S CHARLIE WHO HELPS ME. 204 00:10:03,655 --> 00:10:05,517 Charlie: WHEN I GIVE HER LARGE PORTIONS, 205 00:10:05,517 --> 00:10:07,758 I KNOW IT'S DAMAGING HER BODY, 206 00:10:07,758 --> 00:10:09,931 BUT I SEE THAT SHE'S HAPPY, 207 00:10:09,931 --> 00:10:12,620 AND I WOULD DO ANYTHING TO MAKE NICOLE HAPPY. 208 00:10:12,620 --> 00:10:14,068 Darlene: IF SHE DON'T DO SOMETHING, 209 00:10:14,068 --> 00:10:17,172 SHE AIN'T GONNA BE AROUND TO RAISE HER KIDS. 210 00:10:17,172 --> 00:10:20,103 [ Crying ] I DON'T WANT MY CHILDREN TO GROW UP WITHOUT A MOM. 211 00:10:20,103 --> 00:10:27,206 ♪♪ 212 00:10:27,206 --> 00:10:28,448 [ Normal voice ] MY ENTIRE FAMILY -- 213 00:10:28,448 --> 00:10:33,103 WE PICKED UP OUR LIFE AND BROUGHT IT WITH US. 214 00:10:33,103 --> 00:10:35,517 [ GASPS ] AAH! AAH! AAH! 215 00:10:35,517 --> 00:10:36,655 Nicole: I'M REALLY NERVOUS 216 00:10:36,655 --> 00:10:38,241 BECAUSE I KNOW EVERYTHING IS GOING TO RIDE 217 00:10:38,241 --> 00:10:41,551 ON WHAT THE DOCTOR IS GONNA TELL ME. 218 00:10:41,551 --> 00:10:43,482 YOU DON'T WANT TO EAT THE BAD FOOD, 219 00:10:43,482 --> 00:10:46,965 BUT YOU HAVE TO BECAUSE YOUR FAMILY MAKES YOU? 220 00:10:46,965 --> 00:10:49,241 NICOLE IS NOT TAKING RESPONSIBILITY 221 00:10:49,241 --> 00:10:50,793 FOR HER OWN BEHAVIOR. 222 00:10:50,793 --> 00:10:53,103 HER BOYFRIEND IS ENABLING HER 223 00:10:53,103 --> 00:10:56,000 AND MAY NOT EVEN WANT HER TO LOSE WEIGHT. 224 00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:57,689 Dr. Nowzaradan: I WANT YOU TO LOSE 30 POUNDS 225 00:10:57,689 --> 00:10:59,137 OVER THE NEXT MONTH. 226 00:10:59,137 --> 00:11:01,275 Nicole: I KNOW THIS IS GONNA BE TOUGH, 227 00:11:01,275 --> 00:11:03,482 AND I'M SCARED RIGHT NOW. 228 00:11:03,482 --> 00:11:05,344 I'VE BEEN TRYING TO STAY ACTIVE 229 00:11:05,344 --> 00:11:08,827 AND DO AS MUCH AS I CAN TO MAKE THE PROGRESS THE DOCTOR WANTS, 230 00:11:08,827 --> 00:11:10,724 BUT THE TEMPTATION'S THE WORST 231 00:11:10,724 --> 00:11:12,965 WHEN I GET STRESSED OUT ABOUT WHERE WE'RE LIVING 232 00:11:12,965 --> 00:11:16,137 BECAUSE WE CAN'T AFFORD TO KEEP LIVING IN HOTELS. 233 00:11:16,137 --> 00:11:19,275 THIS SUCKS -- GIVING UP WHAT WE HAD TO GIVE. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN? 234 00:11:19,275 --> 00:11:21,103 Darlene: IN OHIO, WE HAD A HOUSE. 235 00:11:21,103 --> 00:11:23,620 THE KIDS HAD A PLACE TO STAY AND PLAY, HON. 236 00:11:23,620 --> 00:11:26,620 GUYS ARE DRIVING ME [BLEEP] NUTS. 237 00:11:26,620 --> 00:11:30,000 Nicole: ALL THIS IS TEARING MY FAMILY APART. 238 00:11:30,000 --> 00:11:33,275 I'M SCARED IF THE DOCTOR DOESN'T APPROVE ME TODAY, 239 00:11:33,275 --> 00:11:37,000 MY FAMILY IS GONNA GIVE UP AND MOVE BACK TO OHIO. 240 00:11:38,586 --> 00:11:40,551 Dr. Nowzaradan: I DON'T WANT ANY MORE EXCUSES. 241 00:11:40,551 --> 00:11:44,206 YOU'RE STILL RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR CHOICES AND WHAT YOU EAT, 242 00:11:44,206 --> 00:11:46,620 AND BECAUSE YOU MADE SO LITTLE PROGRESS, 243 00:11:46,620 --> 00:11:49,758 I'M REQUIRING YOU TO LOSE 30 POUNDS IN A MONTH 244 00:11:49,758 --> 00:11:51,275 FOR TWO MONTHS IN A ROW. 245 00:11:51,275 --> 00:11:56,172 ♪♪ 246 00:11:56,172 --> 00:11:59,034 I GREW UP IN A PRETTY BROKEN HOME 247 00:11:59,034 --> 00:12:02,344 WITH MY PARENTS JUST DOING HARD-CORE DRUGS, 248 00:12:02,344 --> 00:12:04,344 AND I WAS OUT OF SIGHT, OUT OF MIND. 249 00:12:04,344 --> 00:12:07,482 I HAVE TO LOSE WEIGHT, BUT IT'S VERY STRESSFUL, 250 00:12:07,482 --> 00:12:09,310 ESPECIALLY FOR CHARLIE AND I. 251 00:12:09,310 --> 00:12:12,827 Guidry: I ENCOURAGE YOU TO BE A LITTLE SELFISH. 252 00:12:12,827 --> 00:12:14,896 MAKE THIS ABOUT YOU. 253 00:12:14,896 --> 00:12:19,413 ♪♪ 254 00:12:19,413 --> 00:12:22,310 Nicole: NOW THAT MY FAMILY HAS SOME SPACE TO SPREAD OUT, 255 00:12:22,310 --> 00:12:24,413 WE'RE GETTING ALONG A LITTLE BETTER. 256 00:12:24,413 --> 00:12:27,758 I'M FOCUSING MORE ON THINGS IN MY LIFE THAT MAKE ME HAPPY, 257 00:12:27,758 --> 00:12:30,413 AND I'M FINDING NEW WAYS TO STAY MOTIVATED. 258 00:12:30,413 --> 00:12:37,793 ♪♪ 259 00:12:37,793 --> 00:12:42,068 COPS TOLD ME THAT THEY FOUND NARCOTICS IN THE BACK APARTMENT, 260 00:12:42,068 --> 00:12:43,724 SO TENANTS WENT TO JAIL, 261 00:12:43,724 --> 00:12:46,620 SO THE POLICE HAVE TO SEARCH THE ENTIRE PREMISES, 262 00:12:46,620 --> 00:12:49,275 SO THEY TORE THE REST OF MY HOUSE APART. 263 00:12:49,275 --> 00:12:51,862 THE POLICE LITERALLY MADE ME LIFT MY STOMACH 264 00:12:51,862 --> 00:12:54,655 TO SEE IF I HAD DRUGS UNDER MY STOMACH, 265 00:12:54,655 --> 00:12:57,862 AND THIS WHOLE SITUATION IS THE LAST THING I NEED 266 00:12:57,862 --> 00:13:00,862 'CAUSE ALL I WANT TO DO IS GIVE IN AND EAT. 267 00:13:00,862 --> 00:13:04,103 SOMETIMES I JUST FEEL LIKE NO ONE'S REALLY HERE FOR ME. 268 00:13:04,103 --> 00:13:05,517 BUT I DO CARE ABOUT YOU. 269 00:13:05,517 --> 00:13:06,965 I KNOW YOU DO. 270 00:13:06,965 --> 00:13:08,793 I'M JUST TRYING MY BEST TO GET THIS SURGERY 271 00:13:08,793 --> 00:13:11,172 SO I CAN MAKE EVERYBODY BELIEVE IN ME. 272 00:13:11,172 --> 00:13:13,620 MAYBE YOU GUYS SHOULD TRY TO JUST EAT A HEALTHY MEAL 273 00:13:13,620 --> 00:13:14,862 ONCE A WEEK, YOU KNOW? 274 00:13:14,862 --> 00:13:16,137 YEAH. 275 00:13:16,137 --> 00:13:20,000 Nicole: DR. NOW SAID I HAD TO GET UNDER 607. 276 00:13:20,000 --> 00:13:23,413 YOU ALMOST MADE IT, BUT CLOSE ENOUGH. 277 00:13:23,413 --> 00:13:26,379 I'M GONNA APPROVE YOU FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY, OKAY? 278 00:13:26,379 --> 00:13:28,275 OH, MY GOSH. 279 00:13:28,275 --> 00:13:29,827 Dr. Nowzaradan: I'M PLANNING ON DOING 280 00:13:29,827 --> 00:13:32,482 A GASTRIC-SLEEVE PROCEDURE ON HER. 281 00:13:32,482 --> 00:13:35,379 THIS SURGERY WILL KEEP HER FOCUSED FOR A BIT, 282 00:13:35,379 --> 00:13:38,482 BUT SHE STILL HAS TO DEAL WITH HER EMOTIONAL ISSUES 283 00:13:38,482 --> 00:13:40,896 TO KEEP MAKING PROGRESS LONG-TERM. 284 00:13:40,896 --> 00:13:43,689 Nicole: THERE'S SOMETHING GOING ON BETWEEN ME AND MY DAD. 285 00:13:43,689 --> 00:13:46,241 HE HASN'T COME TO VISIT ME IN THE HOSPITAL. 286 00:13:46,241 --> 00:13:49,655 IT BREAKS MY HEART. [ CRIES ] 287 00:13:49,655 --> 00:13:51,758 I LOVE YOU WITH EVERYTHING I GOT, NIKKI. 288 00:13:51,758 --> 00:13:53,586 I WANT TO ASK YOU SOMETHING. 289 00:13:53,586 --> 00:13:54,931 [ Laughing ] OKAY. 290 00:13:54,931 --> 00:13:57,068 WILL YOU MARRY ME? 291 00:13:57,068 --> 00:13:58,137 [ SNIFFS ] 292 00:13:58,137 --> 00:13:59,344 [ Laughing ] WHY ARE YOU CRYING? 293 00:14:01,724 --> 00:14:02,965 SO? 294 00:14:02,965 --> 00:14:04,172 [ LAUGHS ] YES. 295 00:14:04,172 --> 00:14:05,862 OKAY. 296 00:14:05,862 --> 00:14:08,517 I WANT CHARLIE AND THE KIDS TO BE ABLE TO GO OUT 297 00:14:08,517 --> 00:14:10,896 AND GET OUR OWN PLACE 298 00:14:10,896 --> 00:14:13,551 BECAUSE THERE'S A LOT OF SCREAMING AND YELLING 299 00:14:13,551 --> 00:14:15,034 AND NEGATIVITY IN THIS HOUSE, 300 00:14:15,034 --> 00:14:16,758 AND THERE IS THOUGHTS IN MY MIND 301 00:14:16,758 --> 00:14:18,689 THAT DAD IS DOING DRUGS AGAIN, 302 00:14:18,689 --> 00:14:20,241 AND I DON'T WANT THAT AROUND THE KIDS 303 00:14:20,241 --> 00:14:22,793 BECAUSE THEY'RE GONNA GROW UP THE SAME WAY I DID, 304 00:14:22,793 --> 00:14:24,413 BUT I'M THANKFUL THAT YOU'RE HERE, 305 00:14:24,413 --> 00:14:27,310 BUT I HAVE TO STAND UP AND BE THE MOM 306 00:14:27,310 --> 00:14:29,689 THAT THE KIDS NEED ME TO BE. 307 00:14:29,689 --> 00:14:33,448 ♪♪ 308 00:14:33,448 --> 00:14:35,379 Nicole: I'M REALLY PROUD OF MYSELF. 309 00:14:35,379 --> 00:14:38,517 WELL, I'M PROUD OF YOU, TOO, AND KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK. 310 00:14:38,517 --> 00:14:40,862 Nicole: THERE HAVE BEEN SO MANY INCREDIBLE CHANGES 311 00:14:40,862 --> 00:14:42,655 IN MY LIFE OVER THE PAST YEAR, 312 00:14:42,655 --> 00:14:46,689 AND I'M SO FOCUSED ON BECOMING THE PERSON I'VE WANTED TO BE. 313 00:14:46,689 --> 00:14:55,068 ♪♪ 314 00:14:55,068 --> 00:15:03,517 ♪♪ 315 00:15:03,517 --> 00:15:05,448 ME AND CHARLIE ARE HEADED TO SEE DR. NOW 316 00:15:05,448 --> 00:15:06,827 FOR MY NEXT APPOINTMENT, 317 00:15:06,827 --> 00:15:09,068 AND I FEEL GOOD ABOUT MY PROGRESS TODAY, 318 00:15:09,068 --> 00:15:11,517 BUT THE PAST TWO MONTHS HAVE BEEN A LITTLE STRESSFUL 319 00:15:11,517 --> 00:15:14,103 BECAUSE CHARLIE AND ME HAVE BEEN LOOKING FOR OUR OWN PLACE 320 00:15:14,103 --> 00:15:15,413 HERE IN HOUSTON. 321 00:15:15,413 --> 00:15:17,896 IF MY PARENTS ARE GONNA START USING AGAIN, 322 00:15:17,896 --> 00:15:20,241 I CAN'T ALLOW FOR MY KIDS TO BE AROUND THAT, 323 00:15:20,241 --> 00:15:22,206 OR ANY DRUGS AT ALL. 324 00:15:22,206 --> 00:15:24,965 I'M NOT LETTING THEM HAVE THE SAME CHILDHOOD I HAD 325 00:15:24,965 --> 00:15:27,655 THAT LED ME TO GAINING 600 POUNDS, 326 00:15:27,655 --> 00:15:31,172 SO WE KNOW WE JUST HAVE TO GET OUT ON OUR OWN, 327 00:15:31,172 --> 00:15:32,620 AND WITH ALL THE WEIGHT I'VE BEEN LOSING 328 00:15:32,620 --> 00:15:34,827 AND HOW WELL I'M DOING, 329 00:15:34,827 --> 00:15:36,034 ON TOP OF CHARLIE AND ME 330 00:15:36,034 --> 00:15:38,655 PLANNING ON GETTING MARRIED SOON, 331 00:15:38,655 --> 00:15:41,034 THIS IS TIME FOR US TO BE ON OUR OWN, 332 00:15:41,034 --> 00:15:43,379 BUT THERE AREN'T A LOT OF AFFORDABLE OPTIONS 333 00:15:43,379 --> 00:15:45,172 HERE IN HOUSTON, 334 00:15:45,172 --> 00:15:48,620 SO AFTER SEARCHING FOR A WHILE AND TALKING IT THROUGH, 335 00:15:48,620 --> 00:15:52,344 ME AND CHARLIE DECIDED WE NEED TO MOVE BACK TO OHIO. 336 00:15:52,344 --> 00:15:54,586 ♪♪ 337 00:15:54,586 --> 00:15:56,137 NICOLE LEWIS? 338 00:15:56,137 --> 00:15:57,793 Nicole: BUT I WANT TO KEEP MAKING PROGRESS 339 00:15:57,793 --> 00:16:00,068 AND STAY ON DR. NOW'S PROGRAM, 340 00:16:00,068 --> 00:16:02,655 SO I'M HOPING WHEN I TALK TO HIM ABOUT IT TODAY, 341 00:16:02,655 --> 00:16:04,931 HE'LL LET ME DO THAT. 342 00:16:04,931 --> 00:16:07,068 BUT I KNOW, TO EVEN HAVE A CHANCE AT THAT, 343 00:16:07,068 --> 00:16:08,689 I HAVE TO SHOW DR. NOW 344 00:16:08,689 --> 00:16:11,310 I'M STICKING TO WHAT I'M SUPPOSED TO BE DOING. 345 00:16:11,310 --> 00:16:14,137 IN MY LAST APPOINTMENT, I WAS DOWN TO 521, 346 00:16:14,137 --> 00:16:17,310 AND I SHOULD BE LOSING AT LEAST 15 POUNDS A MONTH, 347 00:16:17,310 --> 00:16:19,827 SO I SHOULD BE BELOW 491 348 00:16:19,827 --> 00:16:22,413 IF I'M STAYING ON TRACK LIKE I NEED. 349 00:16:22,413 --> 00:16:29,793 ♪♪ 350 00:16:29,793 --> 00:16:32,068 I'M FEELING GREAT ABOUT MY WEIGH-IN. 351 00:16:32,068 --> 00:16:35,275 IT WAS MAJOR PROGRESS. IT'S AWESOME. 352 00:16:35,275 --> 00:16:37,103 I WAS EXPECTING 30 POUNDS, 353 00:16:37,103 --> 00:16:41,620 AND THE FACT THAT I LOST 47 POUNDS IS PHENOMENAL, 354 00:16:41,620 --> 00:16:44,620 SO I'M HOPING THIS MEANS DR. NOW WILL BE HAPPY 355 00:16:44,620 --> 00:16:45,965 AND WILL KEEP WORKING WITH ME 356 00:16:45,965 --> 00:16:48,793 EVEN THOUGH CHARLIE AND ME CAN'T STAY IN HOUSTON. 357 00:16:48,793 --> 00:16:50,448 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 358 00:16:50,448 --> 00:16:51,724 -HELLO. -HI. 359 00:16:51,724 --> 00:16:52,827 HOW Y'ALL DOING? 360 00:16:52,827 --> 00:16:54,482 I'M DOING OKAY. 361 00:16:54,482 --> 00:16:56,344 ALL RIGHT, SO, NICOLE, 362 00:16:56,344 --> 00:16:59,517 YOU'RE DOWN TO 474 TODAY. 363 00:16:59,517 --> 00:17:02,275 THAT'S JUST A COUPLE POUNDS LESS THAN THE LAST TIME, 364 00:17:02,275 --> 00:17:05,000 SO YOU'RE STAYING ON TRACK, AND YOU'RE DOING GREAT, 365 00:17:05,000 --> 00:17:07,103 SO HOW'S EVERYTHING GOING? 366 00:17:07,103 --> 00:17:10,034 EVERYTHING'S GOING FINE -- 367 00:17:10,034 --> 00:17:12,448 FOLLOWING MY DIET, DOING PROTEIN. 368 00:17:12,448 --> 00:17:14,379 -MM-HMM. -I'M EXERCISING. 369 00:17:14,379 --> 00:17:15,965 Nicole: MY WHEELCHAIR IS GONE. 370 00:17:15,965 --> 00:17:17,482 I DON'T USE THAT ANYMORE. 371 00:17:17,482 --> 00:17:19,275 I'M ABLE TO DRIVE NOW. 372 00:17:19,275 --> 00:17:22,275 TODAY IS MY FIRST DAY I PUT ON A PAIR OF JEANS IN FOUR YEARS. 373 00:17:22,275 --> 00:17:23,344 ALL RIGHT. 374 00:17:23,344 --> 00:17:24,862 THINGS ARE JUST GOING REALLY GREAT, 375 00:17:24,862 --> 00:17:26,000 WEIGHT-LOSS-WISE. 376 00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:28,896 THE ONLY THING THAT'S AN ISSUE RIGHT NOW 377 00:17:28,896 --> 00:17:32,172 IS OUR FINANCIAL STABILITY, AND OUR LEASE IS UP, 378 00:17:32,172 --> 00:17:36,862 AND WE'RE JUST NOT ABLE TO FIND ANOTHER PLACE WHERE WE'RE AT, 379 00:17:36,862 --> 00:17:41,482 AND SO WE'RE PROBABLY GONNA HAVE TO GO BACK TO OHIO. 380 00:17:41,482 --> 00:17:44,275 WELL, THAT'S VERY CONCERNING TO HEAR RIGHT NOW 381 00:17:44,275 --> 00:17:46,310 BECAUSE THAT'S GONNA BE RISKY FOR YOU 382 00:17:46,310 --> 00:17:49,379 BECAUSE YOU ARE NOT COMPLETELY SETTLED 383 00:17:49,379 --> 00:17:51,172 WITH YOUR OPERATION. 384 00:17:51,172 --> 00:17:53,551 AND THERE ARE ISSUES THAT MAY COME UP, 385 00:17:53,551 --> 00:17:55,862 SO IS THERE ANY WAY YOU CAN STICK AROUND 386 00:17:55,862 --> 00:17:58,655 FOR AT LEAST ANOTHER THREE MONTHS? 387 00:17:58,655 --> 00:18:00,862 CHARLIE HAS HIS OLD JOB BACK IN OHIO 388 00:18:00,862 --> 00:18:03,379 THAT HE CAN GET WITH A $3 RAISE, 389 00:18:03,379 --> 00:18:06,068 AND WE'LL BE ABLE TO BE FINANCIALLY STABLE THERE, 390 00:18:06,068 --> 00:18:07,827 AND THEN WHEN I DO COME TO TEXAS, 391 00:18:07,827 --> 00:18:10,724 IF YOU, YOU KNOW, ALLOW ME TO DO THIS, 392 00:18:10,724 --> 00:18:12,344 I COULD STAY WITH MY PARENTS 393 00:18:12,344 --> 00:18:14,896 BECAUSE MY MOM AND DAD ARE BOTH STAYING IN TEXAS. 394 00:18:14,896 --> 00:18:17,482 SO I THINK WE NEED TO THINK IT OVER 395 00:18:17,482 --> 00:18:20,310 AND SEE WHAT WE CAN DO TO KEEP YOU HERE 396 00:18:20,310 --> 00:18:23,275 AT LEAST TO GET OVER THE HUMP BEFORE YOU GO BACK. 397 00:18:23,275 --> 00:18:24,689 -OKAY. -OKAY? 398 00:18:24,689 --> 00:18:27,137 WHY CAN'T YOU GET A HOUSE WITH YOUR MOM AND DAD 399 00:18:27,137 --> 00:18:30,620 AND SHARE THE EXPENSES? 400 00:18:30,620 --> 00:18:33,551 THEY'RE TOTALLY, LIKE, NOT WANTING TO HELP US. 401 00:18:33,551 --> 00:18:36,241 THEY WANT TO DO THEIR OWN THING AND STUFF LIKE THAT, 402 00:18:36,241 --> 00:18:39,275 SO THEY TOLD ME THAT IF I CAME DOWN FOR APPOINTMENTS, 403 00:18:39,275 --> 00:18:41,310 I COULD STAY WITH THEM, BUT THEY'RE NOT GONNA HELP ME 404 00:18:41,310 --> 00:18:44,206 FIND A PLACE TO LIVE, AND IT'S VERY HURTFUL, 405 00:18:44,206 --> 00:18:46,344 AND IT'S VERY STRESSFUL ON ME 406 00:18:46,344 --> 00:18:50,000 BECAUSE I'VE TRIED SO HARD TO TRY TO FIND A NEW PLACE, 407 00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:51,862 AND I'VE RAN OUT OF OPTIONS AND... 408 00:18:51,862 --> 00:18:53,965 SO WHO'S TAKING CARE OF THE BABIES? 409 00:18:53,965 --> 00:18:56,724 ME. I TAKE CARE OF THEM ON MY OWN NOW. 410 00:18:56,724 --> 00:18:58,965 WHO'S TAKING CARE OF THEM AT THIS MOMENT? 411 00:18:58,965 --> 00:19:01,758 RIGHT NOW, MY MOM. MY MOM HAS THEM AT THE PARK. 412 00:19:01,758 --> 00:19:05,551 OKAY, SO YOU HAVE OPTION OF THEM HELPING YOU 413 00:19:05,551 --> 00:19:08,068 WITH THE TAKE CARE OF THE BABY, TOO. 414 00:19:08,068 --> 00:19:10,896 BUT EVERYONE WHO DOES THIS PROGRAM AGREES 415 00:19:10,896 --> 00:19:12,896 TO A CERTAIN PERIOD OF CARE 416 00:19:12,896 --> 00:19:15,344 SO I CAN MAKE SURE YOU'RE DOING WHAT YOU NEED 417 00:19:15,344 --> 00:19:18,586 AND ON THE RIGHT TRACK SO THERE ARE NO COMPLICATION. 418 00:19:18,586 --> 00:19:19,931 OKAY. 419 00:19:19,931 --> 00:19:22,448 SO LET'S SEE WHAT YOU CAN DO TO FIND A PLACE TO STAY HERE 420 00:19:22,448 --> 00:19:25,137 'TIL WE GET YOU A LITTLE BIT DOWN THE ROAD 421 00:19:25,137 --> 00:19:29,000 'CAUSE YOU STILL HAVE ISSUES THAT WE NEED TO CONSIDER. 422 00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:30,482 OKAY.AND THAT'S GONNA BE 423 00:19:30,482 --> 00:19:33,172 A REALLY DANGEROUS SITUATION WITH YOUR HEALTH. 424 00:19:33,172 --> 00:19:34,655 -RIGHT. -OKAY? 425 00:19:34,655 --> 00:19:37,931 SO AT THE MEANTIME, IF YOU'RE STILL HERE IN HOUSTON 426 00:19:37,931 --> 00:19:41,724 AND YOU LOSE 75 POUND OVER NEXT THREE MONTH, 427 00:19:41,724 --> 00:19:46,275 THEN I'LL APPROVE YOU FOR YOUR FIRST EXCESS-SKIN REMOVAL, OKAY? 428 00:19:46,275 --> 00:19:47,413 OKAY. 429 00:19:47,413 --> 00:19:49,758 BUT MY MAIN CONCERN IS THAT YOU GET THE CARE 430 00:19:49,758 --> 00:19:51,482 AND FOLLOW-UP YOU NEED RIGHT NOW. 431 00:19:51,482 --> 00:19:52,482 RIGHT. 432 00:19:52,482 --> 00:19:54,896 SO WE NEED TO FIGURE THAT OUT, OKAY? 433 00:19:54,896 --> 00:19:56,448 ALL RIGHT. WE'LL TALK AGAIN SOON. 434 00:19:56,448 --> 00:19:58,310 -SEE YOU LATER. -OKAY. 435 00:20:00,034 --> 00:20:03,620 Dr. Nowzaradan: THIS IS A VERY UNFORTUNATE SITUATION WITH NICOLE. 436 00:20:03,620 --> 00:20:05,758 HER BODY STILL HAS A LOT OF STRAIN ON IT, 437 00:20:05,758 --> 00:20:09,413 SO IT'LL BE BEST TO GET HER LITTLE PAST THE SIX-MONTH MARK 438 00:20:09,413 --> 00:20:11,862 FROM THE SURGERY BEFORE SHE GO BACK, 439 00:20:11,862 --> 00:20:14,724 BUT HER REASONS DON'T COMPLETELY MAKE SENSE 440 00:20:14,724 --> 00:20:18,448 IF SHE WANTED TO MAKE THIS A PRIORITY LIKE SHE NEEDS. 441 00:20:18,448 --> 00:20:21,827 SO I THINK THE REALITY IS, SHE WANTS TO MOVE BACK, 442 00:20:21,827 --> 00:20:25,344 BUT GOING BACK IS GOING TO BE VERY BAD FOR HER RIGHT NOW, 443 00:20:25,344 --> 00:20:28,206 AND SHE'S GONNA SLIP BACK ON HER EATING HABIT, 444 00:20:28,206 --> 00:20:30,034 AND SHE'S GONNA GAIN WEIGHT, 445 00:20:30,034 --> 00:20:34,620 AND THIS IS NOT SOMETHING THAT IS GONNA BE POSITIVE FOR HER. 446 00:20:34,620 --> 00:20:36,655 -ALL RIGHT. YOU READY? -MM-HMM. 447 00:20:36,655 --> 00:20:39,655 ♪♪ 448 00:20:39,655 --> 00:20:41,206 Nicole: I'M REALLY STRESSED OUT 449 00:20:41,206 --> 00:20:44,482 BECAUSE HE SAID HE WOULD PREFER ME TO STAY AROUND, 450 00:20:44,482 --> 00:20:47,655 AND AS MUCH AS I WANT TO, I DON'T FEEL THAT I CAN. 451 00:20:47,655 --> 00:20:49,931 WE HAVE AROUND ENOUGH MONEY TO GET TO OHIO 452 00:20:49,931 --> 00:20:52,448 AND FOR CHARLIE TO START DOING HIS JOB, 453 00:20:52,448 --> 00:20:56,000 AND I COULD STAY WITH FAMILY WHEN I GO BACK HOME. 454 00:20:56,000 --> 00:20:58,172 AND IF THERE WAS ANOTHER OPTION, 455 00:20:58,172 --> 00:21:00,413 ME AND CHARLIE WOULD HAVE FIGURED IT OUT ALREADY, 456 00:21:00,413 --> 00:21:03,068 SO WE JUST HAVETO DO THIS 457 00:21:03,068 --> 00:21:06,482 EVEN IF THAT MEANS I CAN'T DO THE PROGRAM ANYMORE, 458 00:21:06,482 --> 00:21:08,482 BUT I HOPE THAT'S NOT WHAT HAPPENS. 459 00:21:14,344 --> 00:21:19,586 ♪♪ 460 00:21:19,586 --> 00:21:24,931 ♪♪ 461 00:21:24,931 --> 00:21:27,310 Ashley: IT'S BEEN A HARD MONTH, BUT IT'S BEEN GOOD 462 00:21:27,310 --> 00:21:29,137 BECAUSE WE'VE MOVED INTO A NEW PLACE 463 00:21:29,137 --> 00:21:32,413 THAT'S A LOT BIGGER AND NICER. 464 00:21:32,413 --> 00:21:34,896 IT'S BEEN A LOT OF WORK, AND LUCKILY, MY HUSBAND WAS ABLE 465 00:21:34,896 --> 00:21:38,241 TO TAKE OFF A FEW DAYS TO MOVE ALL THE BIGGER STUFF, 466 00:21:38,241 --> 00:21:40,482 AND TODAY, I'M JUST OVER AT OUR OLD PLACE 467 00:21:40,482 --> 00:21:41,965 GETTING SOME OF THE LITTLE THINGS 468 00:21:41,965 --> 00:21:44,172 BEFORE I GO BACK TO HELP JACOB AND PATRICK 469 00:21:44,172 --> 00:21:47,275 WITH SOME MORE OF THE UNPACKING. 470 00:21:47,275 --> 00:21:49,379 COMPARED TO THE LAST MOVE WE DID, 471 00:21:49,379 --> 00:21:51,379 THE AMOUNT I CAN ACTUALLY CONTRIBUTE 472 00:21:51,379 --> 00:21:54,172 IS LIKE NIGHT AND DAY. 473 00:21:54,172 --> 00:21:57,068 I CAN CARRY SO MUCH BY MYSELF, 474 00:21:57,068 --> 00:22:00,655 AND A LOT OF THE MOVING HAS JUST BEEN ME, 475 00:22:00,655 --> 00:22:03,275 BUT WITH EVERY STEP I TAKE AND MOVEMENT, 476 00:22:03,275 --> 00:22:06,241 I CAN FEEL MY EXCESS STOMACH SKIN PULLING ON ME 477 00:22:06,241 --> 00:22:10,689 AND JUST GETTING IN THE WAY OF MY LEGS. 478 00:22:10,689 --> 00:22:13,758 IT'S FRUSTRATING TO FEEL LIKE I'VE COME SO FAR 479 00:22:13,758 --> 00:22:15,965 BUT JUST KEEP GETTING HELD BACK. 480 00:22:20,551 --> 00:22:23,379 MY NEXT DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT IS IN A MONTH, 481 00:22:23,379 --> 00:22:26,275 AND I HAVE TO BE BELOW 350 TO BE WHERE DR. NOW 482 00:22:26,275 --> 00:22:29,655 NEEDS ME TO BE TO GET SURGERY, 483 00:22:29,655 --> 00:22:32,517 AND I KNOW I HAVE A LOT OF GROUND TO MAKE UP FOR THIS YEAR 484 00:22:32,517 --> 00:22:34,586 BECAUSE OF ALL MY SETBACKS SO FAR. 485 00:22:34,586 --> 00:22:36,103 HEY, BABY. HEY. 486 00:22:36,103 --> 00:22:37,413 I'VE GOT A FEW THINGS IN THE CAR. 487 00:22:37,413 --> 00:22:38,724 MAMA WENT AND GOT THE REST OF THE STUFF. 488 00:22:38,724 --> 00:22:40,931 WILL YOU HELP ME A LITTLE BIT? 489 00:22:40,931 --> 00:22:42,620 IT'S NOTHING HEAVY, JUST A LITTLE BIT. 490 00:22:42,620 --> 00:22:44,103 [ SIGHS ] 491 00:22:44,103 --> 00:22:46,310 Ashley: SO I'M REALLY HOPING TO LOSE ANOTHER 100 POUNDS 492 00:22:46,310 --> 00:22:48,965 AND HAVE THE 50 POUNDS OF EXCESS SKIN I HAVE 493 00:22:48,965 --> 00:22:51,034 REMOVED OFF MY BODY 494 00:22:51,034 --> 00:22:53,655 AND GET TO MY TARGET WEIGHT THIS YEAR 495 00:22:53,655 --> 00:22:57,344 TO FINISH MY JOURNEY, 496 00:22:57,344 --> 00:23:01,551 NOT JUST FOR ME, BUT FOR MY FAMILY. 497 00:23:01,551 --> 00:23:08,448 ♪♪ 498 00:23:08,448 --> 00:23:10,172 THE ONLY THING THAT I'M WORRIED ABOUT 499 00:23:10,172 --> 00:23:12,758 IS THAT BECAUSE OF ALL THE PACKING AND MOVING, 500 00:23:12,758 --> 00:23:15,551 IT'S BEEN A LOT HARDER TO STAY ON MY MEAL PLAN. 501 00:23:15,551 --> 00:23:18,862 Patrick: PIZZA, PIZZA, P-P-PIZZA. 502 00:23:18,862 --> 00:23:20,241 YEAH. 503 00:23:20,241 --> 00:23:21,793 HOW MANY YOU WANT, BABY? 504 00:23:21,793 --> 00:23:24,620 Ashley: IT MAKES THE IDEA OF GOING TO GRAB SOMETHING QUICK 505 00:23:24,620 --> 00:23:28,000 REALLY APPEALING WHEN YOU'RE LIVING OUT OF BOXES. 506 00:23:28,000 --> 00:23:30,137 I'VE HAD TO CHEAT HERE AND THERE, 507 00:23:30,137 --> 00:23:32,137 BUT GIVEN THE CIRCUMSTANCES, 508 00:23:32,137 --> 00:23:34,586 I DON'T REALLY HAVE A LOT OF OPTIONS. 509 00:23:34,586 --> 00:23:37,586 I'M NOT REALLY SURE HOW MUCH IT'S AFFECTING MY WEIGHT, 510 00:23:37,586 --> 00:23:40,000 BUT I'M HOPING THAT KEEPING TRACK OF MY CALORIES 511 00:23:40,000 --> 00:23:42,827 HAS BEEN ENOUGH TO MAINTAIN MY WEIGHT LOSS 512 00:23:42,827 --> 00:23:44,172 BECAUSE I'M REALLY HOPING 513 00:23:44,172 --> 00:23:46,620 I CAN BE THE MOM I WANT TO BE FOR PATRICK 514 00:23:46,620 --> 00:23:49,379 AND SPEND MORE TIME WITH MY FAMILY. 515 00:23:49,379 --> 00:23:52,206 A COUPLE YEARS AGO, PATRICK HAD TO TAKE CARE OF ME. 516 00:23:53,758 --> 00:23:57,965 PAT, YOU WANT TO GO GET THE HOT DOGS AND THE BREAD FOR MAMA? 517 00:23:57,965 --> 00:24:00,689 Ashley: MY SON HELPS ME WITH EVERYTHING. 518 00:24:00,689 --> 00:24:04,482 HE'S MY LEGS ON A LOT OF THINGS. 519 00:24:04,482 --> 00:24:05,827 I SHOULD BE TAKING CARE OF HIM. 520 00:24:05,827 --> 00:24:08,517 Patrick: THREE ZERO ZERO. 521 00:24:11,000 --> 00:24:13,482 AND I'M PROUD THAT I'VE CHANGED THAT, 522 00:24:13,482 --> 00:24:15,137 BUT PATRICK IS GETTING OLDER, 523 00:24:15,137 --> 00:24:17,517 AND HE'S GONNA NEED EVEN MORE FROM ME, 524 00:24:17,517 --> 00:24:19,620 SO THAT'S MY MOTIVATION AND GOAL, 525 00:24:19,620 --> 00:24:22,517 AND I'M GOING TO WORK AS HARD AS I CAN TO STAY ON TRACK 526 00:24:22,517 --> 00:24:25,137 AND KEEP MAKING PROGRESS, 527 00:24:25,137 --> 00:24:28,172 AND I REALLY HOPE, AT MY NEXT APPOINTMENT WITH DR. NOW, 528 00:24:28,172 --> 00:24:30,103 I'M ABLE TO GET SKIN SURGERY 529 00:24:30,103 --> 00:24:32,724 AND GET A LOT CLOSER TO WHERE I NEED TO BE. 530 00:24:32,724 --> 00:24:39,413 ♪♪ 531 00:24:39,413 --> 00:24:46,034 ♪♪ 532 00:24:46,034 --> 00:24:47,172 Nicole: THE DAY HAS FINALLY COME 533 00:24:47,172 --> 00:24:49,655 TO MOVE FROM TEXAS BACK TO OHIO, 534 00:24:49,655 --> 00:24:53,206 LEAVING BEHIND MY DAD AND MY MOM, 535 00:24:53,206 --> 00:24:55,655 AND WE'RE GONNA BE ON THE ROAD FOR A FEW DAYS, 536 00:24:55,655 --> 00:24:58,724 SO I'M VERY NERVOUS. 537 00:24:58,724 --> 00:25:01,724 I GOT AN EVICTION NOTICE SHORTLY AFTER THE DRUG RAID 538 00:25:01,724 --> 00:25:05,310 A FEW MONTHS BACK, SO I REALLY DON'T HAVE A CHOICE. 539 00:25:05,310 --> 00:25:09,689 I HAVE TO LEAVE TEXAS BECAUSE NO ONE ELSE WILL RENT TO US, 540 00:25:09,689 --> 00:25:11,137 BUT I'M CONFIDENT 541 00:25:11,137 --> 00:25:13,862 WE'RE MAKING THE RIGHT DECISIONS FOR OUR FAMILY 542 00:25:13,862 --> 00:25:16,241 BECAUSE I'M JUST DONE WITH MY PARENTS' FIGHTING 543 00:25:16,241 --> 00:25:18,034 AND TOXIC BEHAVIOR, 544 00:25:18,034 --> 00:25:21,827 AND IT'S BEST IF I GET MY KIDS AWAY FROM THIS ENVIRONMENT. 545 00:25:22,965 --> 00:25:24,448 Darlene: WILL YOU SHUT UP? 546 00:25:24,448 --> 00:25:27,172 Jim: WELL, NO, I AIN'T SHUTTING UP, [BLEEP] [BLEEP] DOPE, 547 00:25:27,172 --> 00:25:29,965 AND HERE WE SIT [BLEEP] [BLEEP] [BLEEP]. 548 00:25:29,965 --> 00:25:31,517 THE POLICE JUST DID ALL THIS [BLEEP] 549 00:25:31,517 --> 00:25:34,586 LOOKING FOR DRUGS, DESTROYED THE [BLEEP] PLACE! 550 00:25:34,586 --> 00:25:36,551 I GUARANTEE YOU, WHEN THE LANDLORD COMES BY HERE, 551 00:25:36,551 --> 00:25:38,482 WE'RE GONNA BE [BLEEP] HOMELESS. 552 00:25:38,482 --> 00:25:40,137 WE ARE DONE! 553 00:25:40,137 --> 00:25:42,034 THERE WAS A DRUG RAID IN OUR BACK APARTMENT 554 00:25:42,034 --> 00:25:43,517 THAT WE RENTED OUT, 555 00:25:43,517 --> 00:25:46,448 SO THE POLICE HAVE TO SEARCH THE ENTIRE PREMISES, 556 00:25:46,448 --> 00:25:50,034 SO THEY TORE THE REST OF MY HOUSE APART. 557 00:25:50,034 --> 00:25:52,931 I JUST HAVE TO GET AWAY FROM MY PARENTS' NEGATIVE ENERGY, 558 00:25:52,931 --> 00:25:55,827 SO AFTER WE SAY BYE TO MY PARENTS, 559 00:25:55,827 --> 00:25:59,896 ME AND CHARLIE ARE TAKING THE KIDS AND LEAVING HOUSTON, 560 00:25:59,896 --> 00:26:03,241 BUT I'M REALLY HOPING DR. NOW CONTINUES TO SEE ME 561 00:26:03,241 --> 00:26:05,827 AND IS WILLING TO LET ME GET SKIN SURGERY, 562 00:26:05,827 --> 00:26:10,172 BUT I KNOW IT'S ALL DEPENDENT ON MY PROGRESS, 563 00:26:10,172 --> 00:26:13,068 SO I'M GONNA WORK REALLY HARD TO LOSE THE WEIGHT I NEED 564 00:26:13,068 --> 00:26:14,655 NO MATTER WHAT. 565 00:26:14,655 --> 00:26:19,310 ♪♪ 566 00:26:19,310 --> 00:26:20,517 I LOVE YOU. 567 00:26:20,517 --> 00:26:22,000 I LOVE YOU, HONEY. 568 00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:25,068 Jim: MY DAUGHTER'S GOT IT SET IN HER HEART TO GO BACK TO OHIO, 569 00:26:25,068 --> 00:26:28,586 BUT I THINK THEY'RE MAKING THE TOTAL WRONG DECISION, MYSELF. 570 00:26:28,586 --> 00:26:31,000 YOU KNOW, I GIVE UP EVERYTHING I HAD TO COME DOWN HERE 571 00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:32,724 TO MAKE A LIFE DOWN HERE WITH HER 572 00:26:32,724 --> 00:26:34,413 FOR THE NEXT COUPLE YEARS, 573 00:26:34,413 --> 00:26:37,586 AND I DEFINITELY DIDN'T THINK IT WAS GONNA TURN OUT LIKE THIS. 574 00:26:37,586 --> 00:26:39,379 SHE'S MY DAUGHTER, AND I LOVE HER TO DEATH, 575 00:26:39,379 --> 00:26:43,068 BUT I CAN'T TELL HER WHAT TO DO, SO I WISH HER WELL, 576 00:26:43,068 --> 00:26:45,413 AND HOPEFULLY SHE DOES GOOD ON HER WEIGHT-LOSS JOURNEY. 577 00:26:45,413 --> 00:26:47,793 I'M VERY PROUD OF HER. 578 00:26:47,793 --> 00:26:49,172 I LOVE YOU, MOM. 579 00:26:49,172 --> 00:26:51,206 LOVE YOU, TOO, GIRL. 580 00:26:51,206 --> 00:26:53,620 Darlene: I'M GONNA MISS NICOLE A WHOLE LOT. 581 00:26:53,620 --> 00:26:56,896 IT'S GONNA BE PRETTY HARD TO SEE THEM LEAVE, 582 00:26:56,896 --> 00:26:59,862 BUT HOPEFULLY SHE CAN MAKE IT BETTER THAN 583 00:26:59,862 --> 00:27:02,137 SHE'S MAKING IT HERE IN TEXAS. 584 00:27:02,137 --> 00:27:05,241 ♪♪ 585 00:27:05,241 --> 00:27:09,310 Nicole: EVEN THOUGH MY RELATIONSHIP WITH MY PARENTS IS VERY ROCKY, 586 00:27:09,310 --> 00:27:12,241 I STILL LOVE THEM, AND I'M GONNA MISS THEM, 587 00:27:12,241 --> 00:27:15,586 BUT MY FATHER -- HE'S STILL DEALING WITH HIS DRUG ISSUES, 588 00:27:15,586 --> 00:27:17,827 AND I CAN'T HAVE THAT AROUND MY CHILDREN, 589 00:27:17,827 --> 00:27:21,379 SO TODAY IS A VERY BITTERSWEET DAY FOR ME. 590 00:27:21,379 --> 00:27:22,655 I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD BE ABLE 591 00:27:22,655 --> 00:27:25,344 TO DRIVE HALFWAY ACROSS THE COUNTRY. 592 00:27:25,344 --> 00:27:29,000 IT JUST SHOWS HOW FAR I'VE COME IN ONLY A YEAR, 593 00:27:29,000 --> 00:27:33,620 BUT IT'S GONNA BE A 20-HOUR DRIVE ALTOGETHER. 594 00:27:33,620 --> 00:27:35,482 LAST TIME IT TOOK US THREE TO FOUR DAYS 595 00:27:35,482 --> 00:27:37,379 TO GET HERE FROM OHIO, 596 00:27:37,379 --> 00:27:41,862 BUT I'M HOPING WE CAN GO FAST THIS TIME, 597 00:27:41,862 --> 00:27:45,689 BUT CHARLIE HAS A CONDITION WHERE HE FALLS ASLEEP EASILY, 598 00:27:45,689 --> 00:27:48,620 SO I HAVE TO DRIVE THE WHOLE WAY THROUGH, 599 00:27:48,620 --> 00:27:52,793 AND I'M SHAKING WITH ANXIETY OVER THIS ROAD TRIP, 600 00:27:52,793 --> 00:27:55,241 BUT I'M GONNA BUCKLE DOWN AND DO IT. 601 00:27:55,241 --> 00:28:02,620 ♪♪ 602 00:28:02,620 --> 00:28:04,896 WE'VE BEEN ON THE ROAD FOR A COUPLE DAYS, 603 00:28:04,896 --> 00:28:07,724 AND IT'S BEEN A HARD TRIP SO FAR. 604 00:28:07,724 --> 00:28:10,931 WE'RE ONLY ONE STATE AWAY FROM OHIO. 605 00:28:10,931 --> 00:28:13,379 JUST THE PHYSICAL TOLL OF THIS TRIP IS JUST -- 606 00:28:13,379 --> 00:28:15,241 MY LEGS AND STUFF ARE CRAMPED UP, 607 00:28:15,241 --> 00:28:19,241 AND THE FACT THAT I'M DOING ALL OF THE DRIVING 608 00:28:19,241 --> 00:28:23,758 CAUSES MY KNEES AND MY LEGS TO HURT REALLYBAD. 609 00:28:23,758 --> 00:28:26,241 Nicole: AND INSTEAD OF HELPING ME AND SUPPORTING ME, 610 00:28:26,241 --> 00:28:29,068 ALL CHARLIE'S DOING IS SLEEPING. 611 00:28:29,068 --> 00:28:31,551 THIS IS NOT WHAT I WANT IN A PARTNER. 612 00:28:31,551 --> 00:28:33,655 I NEED CHARLIE'S FULL SUPPORT AND ATTENTION 613 00:28:33,655 --> 00:28:38,000 DURING THIS ROAD TRIP, AND HE'S NOT GIVING IT TO ME, 614 00:28:38,000 --> 00:28:41,620 SO HOPEFULLY THIS TRIP DOESN'T TAKE US TOO MUCH LONGER 615 00:28:41,620 --> 00:28:45,068 BECAUSE IT'S ALL STARTING TO WEAR ON US. 616 00:28:45,068 --> 00:28:46,275 Nicole: I NEED TO STRETCH MY LEGS. 617 00:28:46,275 --> 00:28:47,862 I'M DYING. 618 00:28:49,344 --> 00:28:52,793 Nicole: CHARLIE, I NEED YOU TO GET OUT MY WHEELCHAIR. 619 00:28:52,793 --> 00:28:53,793 CHARLIE. 620 00:28:53,793 --> 00:28:55,482 Charlie: HEEEEEEY! 621 00:28:55,482 --> 00:28:56,620 [BLEEP] YOU! 622 00:28:56,620 --> 00:28:59,137 I HATE YOU, CHARLIE! YOU CHANGED! 623 00:28:59,137 --> 00:29:00,758 Charlie: I CAN'T GET OUT! 624 00:29:00,758 --> 00:29:03,206 DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND I CAN'T GET OUT?! 625 00:29:03,206 --> 00:29:05,482 YOU CAN GET THIS WINDOW DOWN AND GET OUT! 626 00:29:05,482 --> 00:29:08,310 YOU GO GET MY WHEELCHAIR NOW! 627 00:29:08,310 --> 00:29:11,068 DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND I CAN'T GET OUT OF THE [BLEEP] CAR 628 00:29:11,068 --> 00:29:12,827 TO DO ANYTHING?! 629 00:29:12,827 --> 00:29:15,137 CHARLIE, THIS IS THE LAST TIME 630 00:29:15,137 --> 00:29:17,103 YOU'RE EVER GONNA YELL IN FRONT OF MY KIDS. 631 00:29:17,103 --> 00:29:18,896 [ CHILD CRYING ] 632 00:29:18,896 --> 00:29:21,413 WHEN ALL I DO IS WORK AND TAKE CARE OF YOU AND THESE KIDS... 633 00:29:21,413 --> 00:29:22,827 YOU DON'T HAVE A JOB. 634 00:29:22,827 --> 00:29:24,310 YOU NEVER HAVE. 635 00:29:24,310 --> 00:29:25,379 OH, I NEVER HAVE? 636 00:29:25,379 --> 00:29:26,758 I SUPPORTED YOU FOR THREE YEARS. 637 00:29:26,758 --> 00:29:28,000 YOU ARE THE WORST. 638 00:29:28,000 --> 00:29:29,206 COME ON. WE'RE LEAVING RIGHT NOW. 639 00:29:29,206 --> 00:29:30,758 -NO, PLEASE. -GET YOUR SHOES, JAYDEN. 640 00:29:30,758 --> 00:29:32,793 WE'RE LEAVING. -I DON'T WANT YOU TO GO. 641 00:29:32,793 --> 00:29:35,724 THE LAST TIME YOU DISRESPECT ME IN FRONT OF MY CHILDREN. 642 00:29:35,724 --> 00:29:38,137 YOU CAN GET THIS WINDOW DOWN AND GET OUT! 643 00:29:38,137 --> 00:29:41,137 YOU GO GET MY WHEELCHAIR NOW! 644 00:29:43,206 --> 00:29:46,000 -NOW! -NO, I'M GOING. 645 00:29:46,000 --> 00:29:48,482 I HAVE TO GO TO THE BATHROOM! 646 00:29:48,482 --> 00:29:49,655 I KNOW. 647 00:29:49,655 --> 00:29:51,241 [ DOOR SLAMS ] 648 00:29:52,758 --> 00:29:54,620 Nicole: NOBODY SEES BOTH SIDES OF THE PICTURE. 649 00:29:54,620 --> 00:29:59,000 THEY ALWAYS SEE ME GETTING UPSET AND FREAKING OUT ON HIM 650 00:29:59,000 --> 00:30:01,000 WHEN, IN ALL HONESTY, 651 00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:04,137 HE VERBALLY ATTACKS ME ALL THE TIME, 652 00:30:04,137 --> 00:30:06,965 AND IT EMOTIONALLY DESTROYS ME EVERY DAY. 653 00:30:06,965 --> 00:30:09,172 [ Crying ] OUR RELATIONSHIP'S SUPPOSED TO BE STRONG, 654 00:30:09,172 --> 00:30:10,551 AND IT'S NOT. 655 00:30:10,551 --> 00:30:12,034 IT'S NOT. 656 00:30:12,034 --> 00:30:13,551 I REALLY DO LOVE CHARLIE. 657 00:30:13,551 --> 00:30:18,896 AND I WOULD HATE TO HAVE TO LEAVE HIM OR LOSE HIM. 658 00:30:18,896 --> 00:30:20,517 I KNOW HE'S HAD TO TAKE CARE OF ME 659 00:30:20,517 --> 00:30:23,206 FOR LIKE TWO OR THREE YEARS. 660 00:30:23,206 --> 00:30:25,068 I'M TRYING TO MAKE MYSELF BETTER, 661 00:30:25,068 --> 00:30:27,620 BUT HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO MAKE MYSELF BETTER 662 00:30:27,620 --> 00:30:30,068 WHEN ALL HE'S DOING IS KNOCKING ME BACK DOWN? 663 00:30:30,068 --> 00:30:39,689 ♪♪ 664 00:30:39,689 --> 00:30:43,068 [ Normal voice ] TODAY HAS BEEN AN EXTREMELY STRESSFUL DAY. 665 00:30:43,068 --> 00:30:45,758 WE'RE TRYING TO PUSH THROUGH AND GET THERE, 666 00:30:45,758 --> 00:30:49,379 BUT WE'LL HAVE TO DO AN OVERNIGHT STAY SOMEWHERE. 667 00:30:49,379 --> 00:30:50,862 COME ON, BABY GIRL. 668 00:30:50,862 --> 00:30:53,827 THIS TRIP'S BEEN HARD SO FAR. 669 00:30:53,827 --> 00:30:55,724 ME AND CHARLIE HAVE BEEN FIGHTING 670 00:30:55,724 --> 00:30:58,551 JUST FROM ALL THE STRESS OF TRAVELING WITH KIDS 671 00:30:58,551 --> 00:31:02,517 AND WHAT WE KNOW WE HAVE TO DEAL WITH WHEN WE GET BACK. 672 00:31:02,517 --> 00:31:06,689 SO THE TENSION IS JUST GETTING TO US, 673 00:31:06,689 --> 00:31:10,689 AND I'M JUST AT THE END OF MY ROPE RIGHT NOW. 674 00:31:10,689 --> 00:31:13,310 AT THIS POINT, I JUST WANT SOMETHING TO EAT, 675 00:31:13,310 --> 00:31:17,034 AND I DON'T CARE WHAT IT IS. 676 00:31:17,034 --> 00:31:20,931 I JUST NEED SOMETHING TO CALM ME DOWN THIS ONE TIME. 677 00:31:20,931 --> 00:31:24,965 I'M NOT GONNA START RUNNING BACK TO FOOD. 678 00:31:24,965 --> 00:31:26,896 THIS IS JUST A ONE-TIME EXCEPTION 679 00:31:26,896 --> 00:31:31,103 BECAUSE OF HOW HARD THIS ALL IS, BUT TOMORROW WE'LL BE HOME, 680 00:31:31,103 --> 00:31:32,931 AND I'LL BE READY TO DO WHAT I NEED 681 00:31:32,931 --> 00:31:35,586 AND KEEP WORKING HARD NO MATTER WHAT, 682 00:31:35,586 --> 00:31:39,068 BECAUSE I'M NOT GONNA LET MYSELF START GAINING AGAIN 683 00:31:39,068 --> 00:31:41,448 BECAUSE I WANT MY SURGERY, 684 00:31:41,448 --> 00:31:43,482 AND I KNOW IF I DO START GAINING, 685 00:31:43,482 --> 00:31:46,034 IT'S GONNA BE A DEATH SENTENCE FOR ME 686 00:31:46,034 --> 00:31:49,586 BECAUSE I WILL LOSE THE HELP I HAD WITH DR. NOW, 687 00:31:49,586 --> 00:31:51,448 AND I CAN'T LET THAT HAPPEN. 688 00:31:56,448 --> 00:32:03,965 ♪♪ 689 00:32:03,965 --> 00:32:08,448 Nicole: AFTER FOUR DAYS, WE'RE FINALLY BACK IN OHIO, 690 00:32:08,448 --> 00:32:11,620 AND I'M GLAD THAT WHOLE TRIP IS OVER WITH, 691 00:32:11,620 --> 00:32:15,862 SO WE'RE JUST HOPING TO BE ABLE TO GET SETTLED IN NOW. 692 00:32:15,862 --> 00:32:17,413 WE DON'T HAVE A PLACE YET, 693 00:32:17,413 --> 00:32:19,896 SO WE'RE PUTTING OUR STUFF IN STORAGE 694 00:32:19,896 --> 00:32:23,551 AND STAYING IN A HOTEL UNTIL WE CAN FIND A HOME. 695 00:32:26,172 --> 00:32:28,068 I'M HOPING IT DOESN'T TAKE TOO LONG 696 00:32:28,068 --> 00:32:31,344 BECAUSE I JUST WANT THINGS TO GET BACK TO NORMAL AGAIN 697 00:32:31,344 --> 00:32:34,724 SO I CAN FOCUS ON DOING WHAT I NEED -- 698 00:32:34,724 --> 00:32:39,137 EATING HEALTHY AND LOSING WEIGHT SO I CAN GO BACK AND SEE DR. NOW 699 00:32:39,137 --> 00:32:41,551 AND TRY AND GET WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY. 700 00:32:41,551 --> 00:32:44,862 [BLEEP] THIS THING'S SMALL. 701 00:32:44,862 --> 00:32:48,448 ♪♪ 702 00:32:48,448 --> 00:32:50,310 Charlie: IT'S BEEN A LONG AND A CRAZY TRIP 703 00:32:50,310 --> 00:32:51,586 TO GET TO MARION, OHIO. 704 00:32:51,586 --> 00:32:53,344 IT TOOK A LOT LONGER THAN WE EXPECTED -- 705 00:32:53,344 --> 00:32:56,551 ME AND NICOLE FIGHTING, ARGUMENTS BREAKING OUT -- 706 00:32:56,551 --> 00:32:59,931 BUT WE'RE HERE. 707 00:32:59,931 --> 00:33:02,068 Nicole: THIS IS TURNING OUT TO BE A LOT MORE STRESSFUL 708 00:33:02,068 --> 00:33:04,172 THAN I THOUGHT IT WAS GONNA BE. 709 00:33:04,172 --> 00:33:09,862 ♪♪ 710 00:33:09,862 --> 00:33:12,034 Nicole: WE ARE OFF TO OUR HOTEL 711 00:33:12,034 --> 00:33:15,344 TO GET IN, RELAX, AND, YOU KNOW, 712 00:33:15,344 --> 00:33:18,655 START LOOKING FOR PLACES TO LIVE. 713 00:33:18,655 --> 00:33:21,103 Nicole: BUT IF I DON'T FIND A PLACE SOON, 714 00:33:21,103 --> 00:33:25,241 I KNOW THAT'S GONNA GET REALLY HARD, 715 00:33:25,241 --> 00:33:27,413 AND I DON'T WANT THAT. 716 00:33:27,413 --> 00:33:35,241 ♪♪ 717 00:33:35,241 --> 00:33:43,103 ♪♪ 718 00:33:43,103 --> 00:33:46,344 Ashley: I'M HEADED BACK TO SEE DR. NOW FOR MY NEXT APPOINTMENT, 719 00:33:46,344 --> 00:33:47,965 AND I'M SCARED BECAUSE I'M NOT SURE 720 00:33:47,965 --> 00:33:49,793 I MADE THE PROGRESS I NEEDED, 721 00:33:49,793 --> 00:33:53,000 SO MY MOTHER-IN-LAW AGREED TO COME TAKE ME, 722 00:33:53,000 --> 00:33:55,103 AND SHE'S ALSO GONNA WATCH PATRICK FOR ME 723 00:33:55,103 --> 00:33:59,241 'CAUSE I DON'T WANT HIM WITH ME IF I'M ABOUT TO GET SCOLDED. 724 00:33:59,241 --> 00:34:01,241 Ashley: ALL RIGHT. TAKE THIS. 725 00:34:01,241 --> 00:34:03,448 TELL MAMA GOOD LUCK. 726 00:34:05,482 --> 00:34:07,758 Ashley: I'VE BEEN REALLY TRYING AND WORKING HARD. 727 00:34:07,758 --> 00:34:10,137 I'M JUST WORRIED THAT THE FEW TIMES I CHEATED 728 00:34:10,137 --> 00:34:12,103 MAY HAVE KEPT ME FROM GETTING UNDER 350 729 00:34:12,103 --> 00:34:14,517 LIKE I NEED TO GET SKIN REMOVAL, 730 00:34:14,517 --> 00:34:16,931 AND AT THIS POINT, I REALLY NEED IT. 731 00:34:16,931 --> 00:34:19,103 ASHLEY DUNN? 732 00:34:19,103 --> 00:34:22,172 AT MY LAST APPOINTMENT, I WAS DOWN TO 375, 733 00:34:22,172 --> 00:34:23,965 AND DR. NOW SAID I SHOULD BE LOSING 734 00:34:23,965 --> 00:34:26,275 AT LEAST 15 POUNDS A MONTH, 735 00:34:26,275 --> 00:34:30,965 AND IT'S BEEN THREE MONTHS, SO I SHOULD BE BELOW 315 TODAY. 736 00:34:30,965 --> 00:34:32,896 403. 737 00:34:32,896 --> 00:34:35,241 [ SNIFFS ] 738 00:34:35,241 --> 00:34:38,448 Ashley: I DIDN'T EXPECT TO BE BACK UP THAT HIGH. 739 00:34:38,448 --> 00:34:40,310 [ Crying ] IT'S JUST SEEING THE NUMBER, 740 00:34:40,310 --> 00:34:43,379 ESPECIALLY THE FACT THAT I'M BACK OVER 400 POUNDS, 741 00:34:43,379 --> 00:34:47,172 IS JUST -- IT'S A HARD PILL TO SWALLOW. 742 00:34:49,413 --> 00:34:53,965 SO NOW I REALLY DON'T WANT TO SEE DR. NOWZARADAN TODAY. 743 00:34:53,965 --> 00:34:56,137 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 744 00:34:56,137 --> 00:34:58,655 -HEY, ASHLEY. -HEY, DR. NOW. 745 00:34:58,655 --> 00:35:01,172 HOW HAVE YOU BEEN? 746 00:35:01,172 --> 00:35:02,689 [ Normal voice ] NOT SO GREAT. 747 00:35:02,689 --> 00:35:04,965 WELL, YOU KNOW YOU GAINED ALMOST 30 POUNDS 748 00:35:04,965 --> 00:35:06,586 AFTER DOING SO WELL. 749 00:35:06,586 --> 00:35:08,344 WHAT'S GOING ON? 750 00:35:08,344 --> 00:35:10,241 WE MOVED AGAIN THIS PAST MONTH. 751 00:35:10,241 --> 00:35:11,896 IT WAS JUST REALLY STRESSFUL, 752 00:35:11,896 --> 00:35:14,551 AND I'M FALLING BACK ON OLD TRIGGERS 753 00:35:14,551 --> 00:35:16,448 THAT I HAD BEFORE SURGERY. 754 00:35:16,448 --> 00:35:17,793 LIKE WHAT? 755 00:35:17,793 --> 00:35:21,379 EMOTIONAL EATING WHEN I GET SAD OR STRESSED OUT. 756 00:35:21,379 --> 00:35:23,137 I DON'T BINGE EAT ANYMORE, 757 00:35:23,137 --> 00:35:26,034 BUT THEN I'LL NOTICE MYSELF GRAZING ALL DAY LONG 758 00:35:26,034 --> 00:35:28,206 ON LITTLE THINGS HERE AND THERE. 759 00:35:28,206 --> 00:35:31,310 YOU CAN'T BINGE EAT BECAUSE SURGERY WILL PREVENT THAT, 760 00:35:31,310 --> 00:35:32,620 BUT I DID TELL YOU, 761 00:35:32,620 --> 00:35:34,103 IF YOU DON'T DEAL WITH YOUR EMOTION, 762 00:35:34,103 --> 00:35:36,379 YOU WILL START TO EAT A LITTLE BIT ALL DAY LONG, 763 00:35:36,379 --> 00:35:38,862 AND YOU WILL GAIN, SO THAT WAS HAPPENING 764 00:35:38,862 --> 00:35:40,827 BECAUSE YOU KEEP GETTING TO YOUR PLACE 765 00:35:40,827 --> 00:35:42,827 WHERE YOU STOP PSYCHOTHERAPY, 766 00:35:42,827 --> 00:35:46,103 AND IF THIS IS WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO KEEP DOING, 767 00:35:46,103 --> 00:35:48,448 THEN EVENTUALLY YOU'RE GONNA KEEP GAINING, 768 00:35:48,448 --> 00:35:49,931 AND THAT WILL BE IT. 769 00:35:49,931 --> 00:35:51,448 OKAY. 770 00:35:51,448 --> 00:35:52,689 AND THERE WILL BE NOTHING MORE 771 00:35:52,689 --> 00:35:55,379 WE CAN DO FOR YOU AT THAT POINT. 772 00:35:55,379 --> 00:35:58,034 I DON'T WANT THIS TO BE THE END OF MY WEIGHT-LOSS JOURNEY. 773 00:35:58,034 --> 00:35:59,448 [ Crying ] I DON'T WANT THIS TO BE THE END FOR ME. 774 00:35:59,448 --> 00:36:01,655 I WANT SKIN SURGERY. 775 00:36:01,655 --> 00:36:04,103 WELL, IF YOU WANT SOMETHING, YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO WORK. 776 00:36:04,103 --> 00:36:08,586 YOU WERE DOWN TO 375, AND UP NOW OVER 400. 777 00:36:08,586 --> 00:36:10,655 YOU LOST A WHOLE 300 POUNDS, 778 00:36:10,655 --> 00:36:13,517 BUT YOU STILL GOT ANOTHER 150 TO GO. 779 00:36:13,517 --> 00:36:14,655 MM-HMM. 780 00:36:14,655 --> 00:36:15,931 AND YOU HAVE TO KEEP WORKING AT IT, 781 00:36:15,931 --> 00:36:19,172 BUT YOU KEEP FALLING BACK ON THE SAME EXCUSES, 782 00:36:19,172 --> 00:36:21,172 AND YOU OUGHT TO GET AWAY FROM THIS IDEA 783 00:36:21,172 --> 00:36:24,137 THAT THE STRESS CAUSING YOU TO HAVE PROBLEM. 784 00:36:24,137 --> 00:36:25,896 IT'S NOT STRESS. -YEAH. 785 00:36:25,896 --> 00:36:27,310 YOU HAVE EMOTIONAL ISSUES, 786 00:36:27,310 --> 00:36:29,034 AND YOU STILL HAVEN'T DEALT WITH THEM, 787 00:36:29,034 --> 00:36:30,931 SO YOU'RE STILL OVEREATING. 788 00:36:30,931 --> 00:36:33,482 THE ONLY DIFFERENCE IS THAT YOU CAN'T BINGE EAT, 789 00:36:33,482 --> 00:36:36,689 SO AT THIS POINT, THE ONLY THING THAT CAN BE DONE 790 00:36:36,689 --> 00:36:39,586 IS TO START GOING BACK TO PSYCHOTHERAPY 791 00:36:39,586 --> 00:36:41,379 AND STICK WITH THAT. 792 00:36:41,379 --> 00:36:44,310 SO IF I SET YOU UP WITH THAT, WOULD YOU GO AGAIN? 793 00:36:44,310 --> 00:36:45,724 YES. 794 00:36:45,724 --> 00:36:46,758 OKAY, WE'LL DO THAT, 795 00:36:46,758 --> 00:36:48,379 AND UNTIL WE GET BACK ON TRACK 796 00:36:48,379 --> 00:36:50,034 AND GET UNDER 350, 797 00:36:50,034 --> 00:36:53,379 SKIN REMOVAL IS NOT AN OPTION, 798 00:36:53,379 --> 00:36:56,724 SO I'LL SET UP THE APPOINTMENT WITH THE THERAPIST, 799 00:36:56,724 --> 00:36:58,379 AND YOU START GOING, 800 00:36:58,379 --> 00:37:00,344 AND STICK WITH IT EVERY TWO WEEKS, 801 00:37:00,344 --> 00:37:02,620 AND WHEN YOU COME BACK IN TWO MONTHS, 802 00:37:02,620 --> 00:37:06,275 I EXPECT YOU'LL BE BACK ON TRACK AND UNDER 350. 803 00:37:06,275 --> 00:37:07,689 YES. 804 00:37:07,689 --> 00:37:10,724 AND LET US KNOW IF YOU NEED ANYTHING BEFORE THEN. 805 00:37:10,724 --> 00:37:12,862 TALK TO YOU SOON. BYE. 806 00:37:14,103 --> 00:37:16,448 Dr. Nowzaradan: ASHLEY HAS HAD A LOT OF SETBACKS 807 00:37:16,448 --> 00:37:18,206 OVER THE LAST TWO YEARS, 808 00:37:18,206 --> 00:37:21,275 BUT WHEN SHE HAD THE CHANCE TO MAKE A LOT OF GOOD PROGRESS, 809 00:37:21,275 --> 00:37:22,827 SHE NEVER STICK WITH IT, 810 00:37:22,827 --> 00:37:24,793 AND UNTIL SHE'S READY TO WORK HARD 811 00:37:24,793 --> 00:37:27,689 AND KEEP WORKING THROUGH HER EMOTIONAL ISSUES, 812 00:37:27,689 --> 00:37:31,206 THEN THAT CYCLE IS JUST GONNA CONTINUE. 813 00:37:31,206 --> 00:37:34,241 DEALING WITH HER ISSUES AND WORKING ON THINGS 814 00:37:34,241 --> 00:37:36,482 IS A LIFELONG PROCESS, 815 00:37:36,482 --> 00:37:40,034 AND IF SHE WANTS TO STOP USING FOOD TO COPE, 816 00:37:40,034 --> 00:37:42,620 SHE NEEDS TO STICK WITH HER PSYCHOTHERAPY, 817 00:37:42,620 --> 00:37:45,689 OR IT WON'T MATTER WHAT TOOLS AND OPPORTUNITY 818 00:37:45,689 --> 00:37:48,689 WE GIVE HER TO LOSE WEIGHT AND MAKE PROGRESS. 819 00:37:48,689 --> 00:37:51,344 SHE WILL END UP GAINING AGAIN. 820 00:37:51,344 --> 00:37:55,413 SO IF SHE WANT TO AVOID GETTING BACK UP TO 700 POUNDS, 821 00:37:55,413 --> 00:37:58,068 THEN THIS IS SOMETHING SHE NEEDS TO DO. 822 00:38:00,551 --> 00:38:05,000 Ashley: TODAY HAS BEEN A LOT HARDER THAN I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE, 823 00:38:05,000 --> 00:38:08,241 AND I'VE HAD TO DEAL WITH THIS APPOINTMENT WITH MYSELF, 824 00:38:08,241 --> 00:38:11,379 AND IT MAKES ME FEEL VERY DISCOURAGED. 825 00:38:11,379 --> 00:38:13,344 [ Normal voice ] I FEEL LIKE IT IS KIND OF A WAKE-UP CALL 826 00:38:13,344 --> 00:38:16,137 THAT I NEED TO KEEP GOING TO THERAPY, 827 00:38:16,137 --> 00:38:18,137 BUT I'M STARTING TO FEEL I'M JUST FINDING WAYS 828 00:38:18,137 --> 00:38:20,551 TO KEEP SABOTAGING MYSELF, 829 00:38:20,551 --> 00:38:23,862 SO I AGREE -- I NEED PROFESSIONAL HELP 830 00:38:23,862 --> 00:38:26,275 DEALING WITH ALL MY STRESS AND EMOTIONS, 831 00:38:26,275 --> 00:38:29,655 OR I KNOW I'M JUST GONNA GET TO THE POINT WHERE I GIVE UP, 832 00:38:29,655 --> 00:38:31,310 AND I DON'T WANT THAT. 833 00:38:31,310 --> 00:38:33,655 ♪♪ 834 00:38:37,655 --> 00:38:44,310 ♪♪ 835 00:38:44,310 --> 00:38:50,931 ♪♪ 836 00:38:50,931 --> 00:38:53,689 Ashley: DR. NOW HAS SET ME UP WITH A THERAPIST 837 00:38:53,689 --> 00:38:58,379 TO START TO TRY TO WORK THROUGH MORE OF MY EMOTIONAL ISSUES. 838 00:38:58,379 --> 00:39:01,827 I'VE GONE OFF AND ON SINCE I'VE STARTED THIS JOURNEY, 839 00:39:01,827 --> 00:39:03,413 BUT WHEN I GET TO A BETTER PLACE, 840 00:39:03,413 --> 00:39:05,206 I'VE FELT LIKE I'VE DONE ENOUGH. 841 00:39:06,275 --> 00:39:08,137 HOW ARE YOU FEELING? 842 00:39:08,137 --> 00:39:09,793 -I FEEL A LITTLE BIT LIGHTER. -OKAY. 843 00:39:09,793 --> 00:39:11,275 I DO. I FEEL -- 844 00:39:11,275 --> 00:39:12,827 IT'S LIKE I DON'T HAVE ANYBODY AROUND ME 845 00:39:12,827 --> 00:39:15,034 THAT KIND OF UNDERSTANDS WHAT I'M GOING THROUGH, SO... 846 00:39:15,034 --> 00:39:17,034 Ashley: WITH HOW MY EMOTIONS KEEP COMING UP 847 00:39:17,034 --> 00:39:20,517 AND CAUSING ME THE SAME ISSUES OVER AND OVER AGAIN, 848 00:39:20,517 --> 00:39:23,931 I REALIZE HOW IMPORTANT IT IS TO DO THIS 849 00:39:23,931 --> 00:39:27,517 BECAUSE IT'S NOT GONNA BE A QUICK OR EASY FIX, 850 00:39:27,517 --> 00:39:29,896 AND THERE'S A LOT I KNOW I PROBABLY DON'T EVEN REALIZE 851 00:39:29,896 --> 00:39:32,448 I NEED TO DEAL WITH. 852 00:39:32,448 --> 00:39:33,724 HI, ASHLEY. 853 00:39:33,724 --> 00:39:35,310 -HELLO. -COME ON BACK. 854 00:39:35,310 --> 00:39:36,827 FOLLOW ME. 855 00:39:36,827 --> 00:39:38,172 Ashley: BUT I REALLY JUST WANT TO FIGURE OUT 856 00:39:38,172 --> 00:39:40,482 HOW TO GET PAST THIS WALL I'VE HIT 857 00:39:40,482 --> 00:39:43,793 SO I CAN GET BACK ON TASK AND STAY ON TRACK, 858 00:39:43,793 --> 00:39:46,620 AND THAT'S WHAT I'M HOPING TO DO TODAY. 859 00:39:46,620 --> 00:39:48,310 ALL RIGHT. 860 00:39:48,310 --> 00:39:50,000 OKAY, WELL, WELCOME. 861 00:39:50,000 --> 00:39:52,965 SO, TELL ME A LITTLE BIT ABOUT WHERE YOU ARE. 862 00:39:52,965 --> 00:39:55,896 RIGHT NOW, I'M A LITTLE OVER TWO YEARS OUT 863 00:39:55,896 --> 00:39:58,172 OF HAVING GASTRIC BYPASS.OKAY. 864 00:39:58,172 --> 00:40:01,344 AND I'VE HIT, LIKE, A WALL. 865 00:40:01,344 --> 00:40:06,551 AND IT'S BEEN HELL FOR ME TO GET OVER THE WALL, SO... 866 00:40:06,551 --> 00:40:08,551 YOU'VE BEEN REALLY STRUGGLING. 867 00:40:08,551 --> 00:40:09,689 YEAH. 868 00:40:09,689 --> 00:40:12,000 I STARTED GAINING AGAIN, AND THAT'S SCARING ME, 869 00:40:12,000 --> 00:40:14,103 AND IT'S BEEN PART OF THE PATTERN. 870 00:40:14,103 --> 00:40:16,965 IT'S LIKE, I GAIN A FEW, I LOSE A FEW, 871 00:40:16,965 --> 00:40:18,172 GAIN A FEW, LOSE A FEW, 872 00:40:18,172 --> 00:40:20,310 BUT IT'S LIKE I CAN'T GET PAST THIS POINT. 873 00:40:20,310 --> 00:40:21,758 MM-HMM. GOT YOU. 874 00:40:21,758 --> 00:40:25,724 [ Voice breaking ] SO IT'S STARTING TO WEIGH ON ME. 875 00:40:25,724 --> 00:40:27,551 AND IS THAT WHERE THE TEARS ARE COMING FROM? 876 00:40:27,551 --> 00:40:30,551 I CAN SEE THAT YOU'RE FEELING PRETTY OVERWHELMED RIGHT NOW. 877 00:40:32,482 --> 00:40:34,551 IT'S A WHOLE BUNCH OF STUFF. 878 00:40:34,551 --> 00:40:36,241 WHAT'S GOING ON? 879 00:40:36,241 --> 00:40:40,068 [ Normal voice ] BEFORE SURGERY, HOW I GOT SO BIG WAS EMOTIONAL EATING. 880 00:40:40,068 --> 00:40:41,620 MM-HMM. 881 00:40:41,620 --> 00:40:44,172 AND IT'S JUST -- IT'S, LIKE, TRIGGERS FOR ME. 882 00:40:44,172 --> 00:40:46,241 WHAT KIND OF TRIGGERS? 883 00:40:46,241 --> 00:40:48,931 I'M WORKING ON MOVING NOW, 884 00:40:48,931 --> 00:40:51,379 AND I'M REMODELING MY HOUSE, 885 00:40:51,379 --> 00:40:54,137 AND I'M EATING FOOD THAT I'M NOT SUPPOSED TO EAT. 886 00:40:54,137 --> 00:40:56,034 I'M EATING JUNK. IT STRESSES ME OUT. 887 00:40:56,034 --> 00:40:58,482 BECAUSE YOU'RE FEELING STRESSED AND OVERWHELMED. 888 00:40:58,482 --> 00:41:02,896 WELL, THAT AND I'M BUSY FROM THE TIME I GET UP 889 00:41:02,896 --> 00:41:05,482 TO THE TIME -- 8:30 AT NIGHT, 890 00:41:05,482 --> 00:41:07,965 AND I HAVEN'T REALLY HAD TIME TO MEAL PREP, 891 00:41:07,965 --> 00:41:11,931 AND IT'S JUST BEEN DIFFICULT. 892 00:41:11,931 --> 00:41:15,344 I WANT TO JUST A BE A NORMAL, EVERYDAY PERSON. 893 00:41:15,344 --> 00:41:18,068 [ Voice breaking ] I WANT TO GET SKIN SURGERY SO BAD, 894 00:41:18,068 --> 00:41:20,103 AND THAT'S WHAT I'M TRYING TO GET. 895 00:41:20,103 --> 00:41:21,551 I CAN SEE IT. 896 00:41:21,551 --> 00:41:25,482 I CAN ALMOST GRAB IT, AND I JUST CAN'T GET THERE. 897 00:41:25,482 --> 00:41:28,379 SO RIGHT NOW I'M FAILING. 898 00:41:28,379 --> 00:41:31,068 SO I'D LIKE TO REFRAME THAT, RIGHT? 899 00:41:31,068 --> 00:41:34,793 FAILING IS SUCH A JUDGMENTAL WORD, AND IT'S SO STRONG. 900 00:41:34,793 --> 00:41:36,517 YOU HAD A ROUGH WEEK, 901 00:41:36,517 --> 00:41:40,137 AND INSTEAD OF BEING KIND AND SAYING, 902 00:41:40,137 --> 00:41:42,931 "THAT WAS REALLY TOUGH, AND I CAN SEE I WAS TRIGGERED," 903 00:41:42,931 --> 00:41:45,862 INSTEAD OF USING A REALLY KIND VOICE, 904 00:41:45,862 --> 00:41:47,827 YOUR VOICE GETS MEAN.MM-HMM. 905 00:41:47,827 --> 00:41:49,413 -"YOU'RE FAILING." -I GET HARD ON MYSELF. 906 00:41:49,413 --> 00:41:51,896 "YOU CAN'T GET IT TOGETHER. WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?" 907 00:41:51,896 --> 00:41:55,655 AND THEN -- BOOM -- NOW YOU'RE IN THAT CYCLE, RIGHT? 908 00:41:55,655 --> 00:41:57,827 YEAH, IT'S JUST NEVER-ENDING. 909 00:41:57,827 --> 00:42:00,413 SO ONE THING WE CAN DO RIGHT NOW, THOUGH, 910 00:42:00,413 --> 00:42:02,000 IS WE CAN SEE THERE'S A DIFFERENCE 911 00:42:02,000 --> 00:42:04,931 BETWEEN THE KIND, COMPASSIONATE VOICE 912 00:42:04,931 --> 00:42:07,413 AND THE MEAN VOICE THAT'S PUNISHING, RIGHT? 913 00:42:07,413 --> 00:42:10,482 YOU'RE SMART ENOUGH TO WHERE YOU RECOGNIZE IT, 914 00:42:10,482 --> 00:42:12,241 SO WHEN YOU DO, 915 00:42:12,241 --> 00:42:14,689 THE WAY THAT YOU COPE WITH IT IS WHAT MATTERS. 916 00:42:14,689 --> 00:42:17,482 THINK OF IT -- INSTEAD OF FAILING, 917 00:42:17,482 --> 00:42:21,689 THINK OF IT AS A SIGNAL THAT SOMETHING IS OFF 918 00:42:21,689 --> 00:42:24,034 THAT YOU NEED TO TAKE CARE OF. 919 00:42:24,034 --> 00:42:25,758 OKAY, WELL, WHAT ARE YOUR GOALS? 920 00:42:25,758 --> 00:42:27,551 YOU TOLD ME YOU WANTED TO GET SURGERY, 921 00:42:27,551 --> 00:42:29,758 AND SO YOU NEED TO MEET SOME THINGS FOR THAT, RIGHT? 922 00:42:29,758 --> 00:42:31,448 I WANT TO GET THE SKIN SURGERY. 923 00:42:31,448 --> 00:42:35,517 RIGHT NOW, I HAVE ABOUT 50 TO 60 EXTRA POUNDS 924 00:42:35,517 --> 00:42:37,310 OF EXTRA SKIN ON MY ABDOMEN ALONE, AS WELL. 925 00:42:37,310 --> 00:42:39,586 YEAH, IT'S GETTING IN YOUR WAY. 926 00:42:39,586 --> 00:42:42,034 I WANT TO FEEL NORMAL IN MY OWN BODY. 927 00:42:42,034 --> 00:42:44,344 YEAH, YOU'RE READY TO CLAIM YOUR BODY BACK, 928 00:42:44,344 --> 00:42:47,793 AND THAT'S A REALLY, REALLY IMPORTANT THING. 929 00:42:47,793 --> 00:42:49,896 WE GOT TO WORK ON REFRAMING A LOT OF THE THINGS 930 00:42:49,896 --> 00:42:52,413 THAT YOU HAVE IN YOUR MIND RIGHT NOW. 931 00:42:52,413 --> 00:42:54,896 RIGHT? SO, FIRST OF ALL, LIKE, 932 00:42:54,896 --> 00:42:57,275 YOU HAVE TO THINK ABOUT YOUR RELATIONSHIP 933 00:42:57,275 --> 00:43:01,310 WITH YOURSELF THAT COMES FIRST, 934 00:43:01,310 --> 00:43:03,068 EVEN BEFORE THE FOOD. 935 00:43:03,068 --> 00:43:05,586 I'VE ALWAYS SET MYSELF TO THE BACK BURNER, THOUGH. 936 00:43:05,586 --> 00:43:06,896 THE BIGGEST PART OF THIS JOURNEY, 937 00:43:06,896 --> 00:43:09,275 WHEN I STARTED IT, WAS FOR MY FAMILY. 938 00:43:09,275 --> 00:43:10,586 RIGHT. 939 00:43:10,586 --> 00:43:13,206 AND I THINK NOW I'M TO THE PART OF THE JOURNEY 940 00:43:13,206 --> 00:43:14,965 WHERE I NEED TO BE FOR MYSELF. 941 00:43:14,965 --> 00:43:16,137 EXACTLY. 942 00:43:16,137 --> 00:43:18,172 I NEED TO PUT MYSELF FIRST 943 00:43:18,172 --> 00:43:20,310 BECAUSE IF I DON'T, YOU KNOW, 944 00:43:20,310 --> 00:43:22,275 I'M NOT GONNA BE HERE TO TAKE CARE OF EVERYBODY ELSE, SO... 945 00:43:22,275 --> 00:43:23,586 RIGHT. 946 00:43:23,586 --> 00:43:26,034 YOU DEFINITELY HAVE A LOT OF INSIGHT INTO YOUR SITUATION, 947 00:43:26,034 --> 00:43:28,206 AND I THINK THAT'S A GREAT ASSET YOU HAVE 948 00:43:28,206 --> 00:43:30,862 THAT'S GONNA HELP YOU CONTINUE TO MAKE PROGRESS, 949 00:43:30,862 --> 00:43:32,896 SO NOW WE HAVE A NEW MIND-SET, 950 00:43:32,896 --> 00:43:35,827 WHICH IS, "I'M WORTHY." 951 00:43:35,827 --> 00:43:38,379 [ Normal voice ] I NEED TO CONTINUE FOR MYSELF. 952 00:43:38,379 --> 00:43:39,448 RIGHT. 953 00:43:39,448 --> 00:43:41,931 -I NEED AN OUTLET. -EXACTLY. 954 00:43:41,931 --> 00:43:43,793 THANK YOU FOR SEEING ME TODAY. 955 00:43:43,793 --> 00:43:45,758 OF COURSE. THANK YOU. 956 00:43:47,793 --> 00:43:49,586 Eddins: TODAY I FELT LIKE THE SESSION WITH ASHLEY 957 00:43:49,586 --> 00:43:50,965 WAS VERY PRODUCTIVE. 958 00:43:50,965 --> 00:43:54,344 ASHLEY IS INSIGHTFUL, AND SHE KNOWS DEEP DOWN INSIDE 959 00:43:54,344 --> 00:43:57,827 KIND OF WHAT HER ISSUES ARE -- WHAT'S KEEPING HER STUCK. 960 00:43:57,827 --> 00:44:02,206 I HOPE THAT SHE ALSO RECOGNIZES THAT SHE DOES NEED MORE SUPPORT. 961 00:44:02,206 --> 00:44:04,310 THAT'S THE BIGGEST GIFT THAT SHE CAN GIVE TO HERSELF 962 00:44:04,310 --> 00:44:06,137 ANDHER FAMILY. 963 00:44:08,068 --> 00:44:11,241 Ashley: THERE'S SO MUCH INSIDE ME THAT I DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE, 964 00:44:11,241 --> 00:44:13,827 AND I'VE BEEN SO OVERWHELMED, 965 00:44:13,827 --> 00:44:15,413 AND I WANTED TO GET MY LIFE BACK 966 00:44:15,413 --> 00:44:18,758 AND LOSE THE WEIGHT FOR PATRICK AND FOR JACOB. 967 00:44:18,758 --> 00:44:21,724 BUT ALL THAT HAS PUT SO MUCH PRESSURE ON ME, 968 00:44:21,724 --> 00:44:23,793 AND I THINK THAT LEADS ME TO GIVE UP SOMETIMES 969 00:44:23,793 --> 00:44:26,241 'CAUSE IT'S JUST TOO MUCH. 970 00:44:26,241 --> 00:44:29,689 SO I KNOW I HAVE TO MAKE MYSELF A PRIORITY RIGHT NOW, 971 00:44:29,689 --> 00:44:32,068 BUT I DON'T REALLY KNOW HOW. 972 00:44:32,068 --> 00:44:34,620 [ Voice breaking ] IT'S GONNA TAKE ME WORKING ON MYSELF 973 00:44:34,620 --> 00:44:37,241 'CAUSE I NEED TO DO THIS FOR ME NOW 974 00:44:37,241 --> 00:44:38,862 'CAUSE I REALLY WANT SKIN SURGERY, 975 00:44:38,862 --> 00:44:42,793 AND I WANT IT FOR MYSELF MORE THAN ANYONE ELSE. 976 00:44:42,793 --> 00:44:50,034 ♪♪ 977 00:44:50,034 --> 00:44:57,310 ♪♪ 978 00:44:57,310 --> 00:44:59,862 MOVE, MOVE, MOVE YOUR BOOTY. 979 00:44:59,862 --> 00:45:02,827 -OOH. -JAYDEN, PLEASE PUT THAT BACK. 980 00:45:02,827 --> 00:45:09,275 ♪♪ 981 00:45:09,275 --> 00:45:12,068 OKAY, YOU KNOW WHAT? I'M DONE. 982 00:45:12,068 --> 00:45:16,310 Nicole: WE WERE ALL FINALLY SETTLING IN TO OUR NEW LIFE IN OHIO 983 00:45:16,310 --> 00:45:19,379 UNTIL MY MOM CAME BACK A FEW DAYS AGO. 984 00:45:19,379 --> 00:45:22,655 SHE HAD TO LEAVE HOUSTON BECAUSE MY DAD GOT ARRESTED AGAIN 985 00:45:22,655 --> 00:45:26,241 ON DRUG CHARGES AND IS BACK IN JAIL. 986 00:45:26,241 --> 00:45:28,758 ALL THE TROUBLE I WAS TRYING TO AVOID 987 00:45:28,758 --> 00:45:31,586 JUST FOLLOWED ME HERE TO OHIO, 988 00:45:31,586 --> 00:45:34,310 AND I'VE BEEN TRYING TO STICK TO MY DIET AND LOSE WEIGHT, 989 00:45:34,310 --> 00:45:37,137 BUT IT'S BEEN A STRUGGLE. 990 00:45:37,137 --> 00:45:40,655 SO RIGHT NOW I FEEL LIKE I'M IN A DOWNWARD SPIRAL. 991 00:45:40,655 --> 00:45:42,241 -OOH, YOU WANT SOME OF THAT? -YEAH! 992 00:45:42,241 --> 00:45:44,551 -NO. -ALL RIGHT. 993 00:45:44,551 --> 00:45:47,965 -IT DOESN'T MATTER, CHARLIE. -MAMA SAID NO, JAYDEN. 994 00:45:47,965 --> 00:45:51,517 -[ SCOFFS] GOD. -NO! 995 00:45:51,517 --> 00:45:54,413 -JAYDEN, I'M SORRY. -[ Crying ] NO! 996 00:45:54,413 --> 00:45:55,724 Charlie: COME HERE. 997 00:45:55,724 --> 00:45:57,931 [ JAYDEN CONTINUES CRYING ] 998 00:45:57,931 --> 00:46:00,241 WHAT'S WRONG, BABY? 999 00:46:00,241 --> 00:46:03,206 YOU GIVE IN TO OUR KIDS AND GIVE THEM WHAT THEY WANT, 1000 00:46:03,206 --> 00:46:05,758 AND THAT'S NOT SHOWING THEM OR TEACHING THEM ANYTHING. 1001 00:46:05,758 --> 00:46:08,103 WHAT YOU NEED TO DO IS NOT GIVE THEM POP. 1002 00:46:08,103 --> 00:46:10,068 MAYBE YOU SHOULDN'T BUY POP. 1003 00:46:10,068 --> 00:46:11,655 SO I LET THEM HAVE IT... 1004 00:46:11,655 --> 00:46:13,448 YOU'RE BEING DISRE-- QUIT TOUCHING ME. 1005 00:46:13,448 --> 00:46:14,517 YOU'RE HURTING MY BACK. 1006 00:46:14,517 --> 00:46:18,448 OKAY, WHATEVER. DONE. 1007 00:46:18,448 --> 00:46:20,586 GIVE YOUR KIDS POP, WONDER WHY THEY'RE OVERWEIGHT, 1008 00:46:20,586 --> 00:46:21,931 AND CRY ABOUT IT -- 1009 00:46:21,931 --> 00:46:24,482 THAT DOESN'T MAKE ANY SENSE TO ME AT ALL. 1010 00:46:24,482 --> 00:46:27,137 Nicole: I STILL CAN'T BELIEVE THAT CHARLIE DOESN'T UNDERSTAND 1011 00:46:27,137 --> 00:46:31,482 THAT DRINKING SODA AND GIVING IT TO OUR CHILDREN IS AFFECTING ME, 1012 00:46:31,482 --> 00:46:33,827 SO MAYBE HE JUST DOESN'T CARE. 1013 00:46:33,827 --> 00:46:36,275 SOMETHING'S GOT TO GIVE 1014 00:46:36,275 --> 00:46:38,517 BECAUSE NOT ONLY IS IT BAD FOR THEM, 1015 00:46:38,517 --> 00:46:41,551 BUT IT MAKES IT HARDER FOR ME, TOO, 1016 00:46:41,551 --> 00:46:43,103 AND IT MAKES IT SO MUCH HARDER FOR ME 1017 00:46:43,103 --> 00:46:47,896 NOT TO GIVE IN A LITTLE AND COMPROMISE. 1018 00:46:47,896 --> 00:46:49,793 SO IT'S JUST REALLY HARD RIGHT NOW, 1019 00:46:49,793 --> 00:46:52,068 AND I'M WORRIED ABOUT WHAT THAT'S GONNA MEAN FOR ME 1020 00:46:52,068 --> 00:46:54,551 DOING DR. NOW'S PROGRAM 1021 00:46:54,551 --> 00:46:57,068 BECAUSE I'M GOING BACK TO HOUSTON SOON TO SEE HIM 1022 00:46:57,068 --> 00:47:02,103 AND BECAUSE I WANT TO VISIT MY FATHER AND SEE HOW HE'S DOING, 1023 00:47:02,103 --> 00:47:03,862 BUT I'M REALLY SCARED RIGHT NOW 1024 00:47:03,862 --> 00:47:06,103 BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN. 1025 00:47:11,275 --> 00:47:18,586 ♪♪ 1026 00:47:18,586 --> 00:47:26,034 ♪♪ 1027 00:47:26,034 --> 00:47:27,965 Ashley: I'VE BEEN TAKING MY THERAPIST'S ADVICE 1028 00:47:27,965 --> 00:47:31,551 TO REALLY FOCUS ON TAKING CARE OF MYSELF, 1029 00:47:31,551 --> 00:47:34,241 SO A MONTH AGO, I DECIDED TO GET A PERSONAL TRAINER 1030 00:47:34,241 --> 00:47:36,206 TO HELP ME REALLY LOSE THE WEIGHT... 1031 00:47:36,206 --> 00:47:38,758 -HEY, ASHLEY. -HEY, NICK. 1032 00:47:38,758 --> 00:47:40,724 FIST BUMP. 1033 00:47:40,724 --> 00:47:42,862 HOW'S IT GOING? -GOOD. 1034 00:47:42,862 --> 00:47:44,379 STRETCH OUT A LITTLE BIT. 1035 00:47:44,379 --> 00:47:47,862 Ashley: ...AND IT REALLY PUSHES ME TO BE BETTER FOR MYSELF. 1036 00:47:47,862 --> 00:47:50,655 IT'S ALSO HELPED REDUCE PAIN THAT I'VE HAD IN MY BACK 1037 00:47:50,655 --> 00:47:52,793 AND IMPROVED MY STAMINA. 1038 00:47:52,793 --> 00:47:55,000 AND, BEST OF ALL, IT FEELS LIKE IT'S A GOOD OUTLET 1039 00:47:55,000 --> 00:47:57,172 FOR WHEN I GET STRESSED. 1040 00:48:00,413 --> 00:48:01,724 IT'S REALLY AMAZING 1041 00:48:01,724 --> 00:48:03,896 THINKING ABOUT THE EXERCISES I'M ABLE TO DO 1042 00:48:03,896 --> 00:48:07,689 COMPARED TO BARELY BEING ABLE TO MOVE AROUND TWO YEARS AGO. 1043 00:48:07,689 --> 00:48:09,965 AND BEING ABLE TO BRING MY SON WITH ME 1044 00:48:09,965 --> 00:48:13,000 AND HAVING HIM SEE HIS MOTHER GETTING STRONGER AND MORE ACTIVE 1045 00:48:13,000 --> 00:48:15,137 IS REALLY IMPORTANT TO ME, 1046 00:48:15,137 --> 00:48:17,620 ESPECIALLY BECAUSE, WHEN I WAS 700 POUNDS, 1047 00:48:17,620 --> 00:48:19,758 HE WAS HAVING TO DO SO MUCH FOR ME AROUND THE HOUSE 1048 00:48:19,758 --> 00:48:21,586 BECAUSE I COULD BARELY FUNCTION. 1049 00:48:22,689 --> 00:48:24,379 WE'RE GONNA DO SOME LAUNDRY REAL QUICK. 1050 00:48:24,379 --> 00:48:28,655 Ashley: HE HAS TO HELP ME WITH JUST ABOUT EVERY HOUSEHOLD CHORE. 1051 00:48:31,241 --> 00:48:33,448 I SHOULD DO EVERYTHING FOR HIM. 1052 00:48:37,551 --> 00:48:39,689 I FEEL TERRIBLE THAT A CHILD WOULD HAVE TO 1053 00:48:39,689 --> 00:48:42,413 TAKE CARE OF HIS MOTHER LIKE THAT, 1054 00:48:42,413 --> 00:48:44,241 SO I KNOW I HAVE TO KEEP PUSHING 1055 00:48:44,241 --> 00:48:46,931 TO MAKE SURE I NEVER GO BACK TO THAT LIFE. 1056 00:48:50,379 --> 00:48:52,413 ALL RIGHT, THIS IS THE FUN PART, ASHLEY. 1057 00:48:52,413 --> 00:48:54,655 WE CAN GO FOR A TWO-MINUTE ROW. -OKAY. 1058 00:48:54,655 --> 00:48:57,310 Ashley: BUT AS I LOSE WEIGHT, I CAN JUST FEEL MY STOMACH SKIN 1059 00:48:57,310 --> 00:49:00,482 GETTING IN THE WAY OF EVERY MOVEMENT. 1060 00:49:00,482 --> 00:49:01,931 WHEN I'M ON THE ROWING MACHINE, 1061 00:49:01,931 --> 00:49:04,206 I HAVE TO MOVE MY LEGS OUT OF THE WAY OF MY STOMACH, 1062 00:49:04,206 --> 00:49:07,413 AND IT'S JUST UNCOMFORTABLE TO KEEP MOVING, 1063 00:49:07,413 --> 00:49:10,379 AND THE FOLDS ON MY STOMACH JUST RUB UP AGAINST EACH OTHER, 1064 00:49:10,379 --> 00:49:13,172 AND IT JUST MAKES ME WANT TO STOP, 1065 00:49:13,172 --> 00:49:16,448 BUT EXERCISING HAS MENTALLY PUT ME IN A BETTER PLACE 1066 00:49:16,448 --> 00:49:18,103 AND REALLY HELPED ME FOCUS ON MY GOAL 1067 00:49:18,103 --> 00:49:19,724 OF GETTING SKIN-REMOVAL SURGERY. 1068 00:49:19,724 --> 00:49:21,000 AND THERE'S TWO. 1069 00:49:21,000 --> 00:49:23,793 GOOD JOB, ASHLEY, OVER A QUARTER MILE. 1070 00:49:26,275 --> 00:49:28,137 OH, I HATE THESE. 1071 00:49:28,137 --> 00:49:30,103 Ashley: I HAVE AN APPOINTMENT NEXT MONTH, 1072 00:49:30,103 --> 00:49:32,827 AND I JUST HAVE TO GET APPROVED. 1073 00:49:32,827 --> 00:49:34,793 I WANT THIS SURGERY MORE THAN ANYTHING, 1074 00:49:34,793 --> 00:49:38,448 AND I FEEL LIKE I'VE WORKED SO HARD TO GET IT. 1075 00:49:38,448 --> 00:49:40,103 IF I CAN KEEP GOING LIKE THIS, 1076 00:49:40,103 --> 00:49:43,275 WORKING ON MY DIET, MY BODY, AND MY MIND, 1077 00:49:43,275 --> 00:49:45,689 I KNOW I CAN GET TO WHERE I NEED TO BE. 1078 00:49:45,689 --> 00:49:47,758 I KNOW I CAN GET THERE. 1079 00:49:47,758 --> 00:49:55,620 ♪♪ 1080 00:49:55,620 --> 00:50:03,551 ♪♪ 1081 00:50:03,551 --> 00:50:06,862 Nicole: TODAY, I'M FLYING TO HOUSTON TO SEE MY DAD IN JAIL. 1082 00:50:08,862 --> 00:50:12,586 AND MY DAD JUST FOUND OUT HE HAS PANCREATIC CANCER, 1083 00:50:12,586 --> 00:50:16,896 AND THE DOCTORS ARE GIVING HIM LESS THAN A YEAR TO LIVE, 1084 00:50:16,896 --> 00:50:19,172 SO I NEED TO SEE HIM. 1085 00:50:19,172 --> 00:50:22,275 AND WHILE I'M THERE, I MADE AN APPOINTMENT TO SEE DR. NOW 1086 00:50:22,275 --> 00:50:24,310 TO FIND OUT HOW I'M DOING, 1087 00:50:24,310 --> 00:50:26,793 BUT I'M EXTREMELY NERVOUS RIGHT NOW 1088 00:50:26,793 --> 00:50:28,586 BECAUSE I HAVE NEVER BEEN ON AN AIRPLANE, 1089 00:50:28,586 --> 00:50:31,206 AND I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT TO EXPECT. 1090 00:50:31,206 --> 00:50:33,655 I'M REALLY, REALLY FREAKING NERVOUS, CHARLIE. 1091 00:50:33,655 --> 00:50:34,689 I KNOW, BABY. 1092 00:50:34,689 --> 00:50:35,862 LIKE, I'M NERVOUS ABOUT THE FACT 1093 00:50:35,862 --> 00:50:37,275 THAT I'M NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO DRIVE THE PLANE. 1094 00:50:37,275 --> 00:50:39,482 I'M ALWAYS DRIVING, AND I HAVE NO CONTROL, 1095 00:50:39,482 --> 00:50:41,000 AND I'M JUST, LIKE -- I'M FREAKING OUT. 1096 00:50:41,000 --> 00:50:42,965 IT'S NOT THAT BAD. YOU'LL BE ALL RIGHT. 1097 00:50:42,965 --> 00:50:45,793 THE WORST PART IS TAKEOFF AND LANDING, 1098 00:50:45,793 --> 00:50:47,724 PLUS I'LL BE BY YOUR SIDE. 1099 00:50:47,724 --> 00:50:49,413 [ Whispering ] I know that, but I'm scared. 1100 00:50:49,413 --> 00:50:50,724 [ Whispering ] You'll be all right. 1101 00:50:50,724 --> 00:50:52,000 Come on. 1102 00:50:52,000 --> 00:50:53,517 [ Normal voice ] I LOVE YOU. 1103 00:50:53,517 --> 00:50:56,344 [ Normal voice ] I LOVE YOU, BEAUTIFUL. 1104 00:50:56,344 --> 00:50:57,724 YOU SMELL GOOD. 1105 00:50:57,724 --> 00:51:00,275 Nicole: MY COUSIN IS GONNA STAY HERE AND WATCH THE KIDS 1106 00:51:00,275 --> 00:51:04,620 WHILE CHARLIE AND I ARE GONE FOR THE NEXT TWO DAYS. 1107 00:51:04,620 --> 00:51:08,241 IT'S BEEN FIVE MONTHS SINCE I'VE SEEN DR. NOW, 1108 00:51:08,241 --> 00:51:10,482 AND I HOPE I'VE BEEN ABLE TO MAKE SOME PROGRESS 1109 00:51:10,482 --> 00:51:13,068 WITH MY WEIGHT LOSS TO SHOW DR. NOW 1110 00:51:13,068 --> 00:51:17,413 I'M STILL DOING IT, EVEN THOUGH I'M HERE IN OHIO. 1111 00:51:17,413 --> 00:51:20,551 AND WITH SO MUCH GOING ON, CHARLIE AND ME TALKED 1112 00:51:20,551 --> 00:51:24,448 AND DECIDED IT'S BEST IF WE PUT OUR WEDDING ON HOLD RIGHT NOW, 1113 00:51:24,448 --> 00:51:27,344 AT LEAST UNTIL THINGS SETTLE DOWN 1114 00:51:27,344 --> 00:51:30,827 AND WE GET TO A BETTER PLACE. 1115 00:51:30,827 --> 00:51:35,517 EVEN THOUGH THE REASON FOR THIS TRIP IS EXTREMELY SAD, 1116 00:51:35,517 --> 00:51:39,000 IT'S A SMALL VICTORY TO BE ABLE TO GET ON A PLANE. 1117 00:51:39,000 --> 00:51:43,551 ♪♪ 1118 00:51:43,551 --> 00:51:45,724 -WHERE ARE WE HEADED TO? -HOUSTON. 1119 00:51:45,724 --> 00:51:47,000 OKAY. AND DO YOU HAVE YOUR ID? 1120 00:51:47,000 --> 00:51:48,482 YES. 1121 00:51:48,482 --> 00:51:51,310 I ALSO AM GONNA NEED A WHEELCHAIR. 1122 00:51:51,310 --> 00:51:56,000 Nicole: BEFORE, I WOULDN'T HAVE EVEN BEEN ABLE TO FIT IN A SEAT. 1123 00:51:56,000 --> 00:51:57,724 IT WAS ONLY A YEAR AND A HALF AGO 1124 00:51:57,724 --> 00:52:00,172 WHEN I COULDN'T EVEN FIT IN MY BATHROOM, 1125 00:52:00,172 --> 00:52:04,000 AND NOW HERE I AM GETTING READY TO FLY FOR THE FIRST TIME. 1126 00:52:05,379 --> 00:52:06,965 [ SIGHS ] -YOU GOOD? 1127 00:52:06,965 --> 00:52:09,551 I FIT, AND I'M ACTUALLY COMFORTABLE. [ LAUGHS ] 1128 00:52:09,551 --> 00:52:11,965 -ALL RIGHT. -AWESOME! 1129 00:52:11,965 --> 00:52:15,448 Nicole: AND I'M GLAD I'VE GOT CHARLIE COMING WITH ME. 1130 00:52:15,448 --> 00:52:18,482 WE'VE HAD OUR FAIR SHARE OF FIGHTS LATELY, 1131 00:52:18,482 --> 00:52:22,586 BUT WHEN PUSH COMES TO SHOVE, CHARLIE'S THERE FOR ME, 1132 00:52:22,586 --> 00:52:24,137 AND RIGHT NOW I'M READY TO FACE 1133 00:52:24,137 --> 00:52:26,206 WHATEVER WAITS FOR ME IN HOUSTON. 1134 00:52:31,793 --> 00:52:37,137 ♪♪ 1135 00:52:37,137 --> 00:52:42,448 ♪♪ 1136 00:52:42,448 --> 00:52:45,137 Nicole: ME AND CHARLIE MADE IT TO HOUSTON, 1137 00:52:45,137 --> 00:52:48,206 AND WE'RE HEADED STRAIGHT TO SEE DR. NOW. 1138 00:52:48,206 --> 00:52:49,896 I'M REALLY NERVOUS. 1139 00:52:49,896 --> 00:52:52,275 HE DIDN'T THINK IT WAS A GOOD IDEA TO LEAVE HOUSTON, 1140 00:52:52,275 --> 00:52:54,586 BUT I DID ANYWAY, 1141 00:52:54,586 --> 00:52:56,275 AND I FIGURED THE ONLY WAY TO SHOW HIM 1142 00:52:56,275 --> 00:52:58,517 THAT I MADE THE RIGHT DECISION 1143 00:52:58,517 --> 00:53:03,000 IS TO SHOW HIM I STAYED ON TRACK AND MADE GOOD PROGRESS STILL, 1144 00:53:03,000 --> 00:53:06,000 SO I'M HOPING I'M AT LEAST CLOSE TO THAT TODAY 1145 00:53:06,000 --> 00:53:09,034 SO I CAN NOT ONLY STAY ON DR. NOW'S PROGRAM 1146 00:53:09,034 --> 00:53:12,068 BUT THAT I CAN GET SKIN REMOVAL, TOO. 1147 00:53:12,068 --> 00:53:16,172 BUT BECAUSE OF ALL THE CRAZINESS OF LIFE... 1148 00:53:16,172 --> 00:53:18,068 NICOLE LEWIS? 1149 00:53:18,068 --> 00:53:21,172 ...IT'S BEEN FIVE MONTHS SINCE I WAS HERE LAST, 1150 00:53:21,172 --> 00:53:24,793 AND I WAS AT 474 THE LAST TIME I WAS HERE, 1151 00:53:24,793 --> 00:53:26,758 AND HE SAID I'M SUPPOSED TO BE LOSING 1152 00:53:26,758 --> 00:53:29,482 AT LEAST 15 POUNDS A MONTH, 1153 00:53:29,482 --> 00:53:33,206 SO THAT MEANS I SHOULD BE JUST UNDER 400 TODAY. 1154 00:53:33,206 --> 00:53:41,034 ♪♪ 1155 00:53:41,034 --> 00:53:44,758 I'M NOT TOO HAPPY ABOUT THAT. 1156 00:53:44,758 --> 00:53:48,793 IT'S STILL A LOSS, BUT IT'S NOT AS MUCH AS I WAS HOPING, 1157 00:53:48,793 --> 00:53:51,172 AND I JUST HOPE IT'S ENOUGH TO SHOW DR. NOW 1158 00:53:51,172 --> 00:53:54,172 THAT I'M STILL TRYING. 1159 00:53:54,172 --> 00:53:58,517 AND HOPEFULLY HE ISN'T TOO UPSET ABOUT LAST TIME. 1160 00:53:58,517 --> 00:54:00,758 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 1161 00:54:00,758 --> 00:54:02,620 -HELLO. -HI. 1162 00:54:02,620 --> 00:54:03,931 HOW ARE YOU ALL DOING? 1163 00:54:03,931 --> 00:54:05,206 DOING ALL RIGHT. 1164 00:54:05,206 --> 00:54:07,448 ALL RIGHT, NICOLE, WHEN YOU SKIPPED TOWN, 1165 00:54:07,448 --> 00:54:10,000 I WASN'T SURE IF I WAS GONNA SEE YOU AGAIN, 1166 00:54:10,000 --> 00:54:12,000 AND YOU CAN OBVIOUSLY GUESS 1167 00:54:12,000 --> 00:54:14,551 THAT I HAVE SOME CONCERNS ABOUT THAT. 1168 00:54:14,551 --> 00:54:16,379 BUT TELL ME HOW YOU'RE DOING. 1169 00:54:16,379 --> 00:54:17,827 I'M GETTING ALONG PRETTY GOOD. 1170 00:54:17,827 --> 00:54:19,793 I'VE BEEN GOING THROUGH A LOT OF EMOTIONAL ISSUES 1171 00:54:19,793 --> 00:54:21,310 IN MY FAMILY LATELY. 1172 00:54:21,310 --> 00:54:23,896 MY DAD ACTUALLY GOT ARRESTED, 1173 00:54:23,896 --> 00:54:26,448 AND HE ALSO FOUND OUT HE HAS PANCREATIC CANCER 1174 00:54:26,448 --> 00:54:28,793 AND HAS LESS THAN A YEAR TO LIVE, 1175 00:54:28,793 --> 00:54:32,413 SO IT'S JUST A LOT TO TAKE IN. 1176 00:54:32,413 --> 00:54:33,931 IT'S LIKE EVERYTHING'S HITTING ME AT ONCE, 1177 00:54:33,931 --> 00:54:36,689 SO IT'S LIKE MY MIND'S KIND OF BOGGLED, 1178 00:54:36,689 --> 00:54:38,310 I GUESS YOU COULD SAY. 1179 00:54:38,310 --> 00:54:40,206 I AM SORRY TO HEAR ALL THAT 1180 00:54:40,206 --> 00:54:42,310 AND THAT YOU HAVE ALL OF THAT GOING ON. 1181 00:54:42,310 --> 00:54:44,551 I KNOW IT MUST BE A HARD TIME, 1182 00:54:44,551 --> 00:54:46,965 BUT WITH EVERYTHING GOING ON IN YOUR LIFE, 1183 00:54:46,965 --> 00:54:51,275 YOU NEED TO MAKE SURE YOUR HEALTH STAYS A PRIORITY, 1184 00:54:51,275 --> 00:54:55,241 AND YOU DIDN'T DO THAT WHEN YOU DECIDED TO MOVE BACK TO OHIO, 1185 00:54:55,241 --> 00:54:58,517 BUT THE GOOD NEWS IS THAT YOU'RE NOT GAINING YET. 1186 00:54:58,517 --> 00:55:01,551 BUT AFTER DOING SO WELL, YOUR WEIGHT LOSS IS SLOWING, 1187 00:55:01,551 --> 00:55:03,724 SO IT'S JUST A MATTER OF TIME 1188 00:55:03,724 --> 00:55:05,551 BEFORE YOU START GAINING AGAIN. 1189 00:55:05,551 --> 00:55:06,551 RIGHT. 1190 00:55:06,551 --> 00:55:08,206 YOU SHOULD BE AT 399 TODAY, 1191 00:55:08,206 --> 00:55:10,793 BUT YOU'RE ONLY AT 438. 1192 00:55:10,793 --> 00:55:12,448 THAT'S SOMETHING I WANTED TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT 1193 00:55:12,448 --> 00:55:14,034 WITH CHARLIE. 1194 00:55:14,034 --> 00:55:16,689 HIS POOR EATING HABITS -- 1195 00:55:16,689 --> 00:55:18,862 HE'S GIVING IT RIGHT TO MY KIDS. 1196 00:55:18,862 --> 00:55:21,620 YOU KNOW, LIKE, I'LL HAVE HEALTHY FOOD IN OUR HOUSE. 1197 00:55:21,620 --> 00:55:24,137 HE'LL COME HOME, AND HE'LL BRING, LIKE, POTATO CHIPS 1198 00:55:24,137 --> 00:55:26,034 AND POP AND CANDY BARS 1199 00:55:26,034 --> 00:55:27,896 AND, LIKE, SNACKS AND STUFF LIKE THAT. 1200 00:55:27,896 --> 00:55:29,724 SO YOU'RE BLAMING CHARLIE, THEN? 1201 00:55:29,724 --> 00:55:31,137 YES. 1202 00:55:31,137 --> 00:55:33,310 OKAY, YOU HAVE TO BOTH AGREE 1203 00:55:33,310 --> 00:55:34,586 ABOUT WHAT YOU'RE GONNA DO 1204 00:55:34,586 --> 00:55:36,965 OR NOT GONNA DO WITH THE KIDS. 1205 00:55:36,965 --> 00:55:40,379 THIS IS SOMETHING THAT YOU TWO HAVE TO WORK IT OUT, 1206 00:55:40,379 --> 00:55:44,689 AND, CHARLIE, YOU CAN'T BE A BAD INFLUENCE ON THE KID, 1207 00:55:44,689 --> 00:55:48,379 AND YOU CAN'T PUT STRESS ON NICOLE, 1208 00:55:48,379 --> 00:55:50,827 SO YOU HAVE RESPONSIBILITY IN YOUR FAMILY. 1209 00:55:50,827 --> 00:55:52,103 RIGHT. 1210 00:55:52,103 --> 00:55:53,620 I WANT ME AND HIM TO GET ON THE SAME PAGE 1211 00:55:53,620 --> 00:55:55,103 FOR BOTH OF OUR CHILDREN. 1212 00:55:55,103 --> 00:55:56,896 -YOU HEAR THAT? -YES, SIR. 1213 00:55:56,896 --> 00:56:00,275 OKAY, BUT NICOLE, DESPITE THIS, 1214 00:56:00,275 --> 00:56:04,000 YOU CAN'T BLAME CHARLIE FOR YOUR OWN BAD CHOICES. 1215 00:56:04,000 --> 00:56:05,482 OKAY. 1216 00:56:05,482 --> 00:56:07,931 THE CHOICE TO JOIN IN OR TO EAT WHAT YOU SHOULDN'T -- 1217 00:56:07,931 --> 00:56:10,137 YOU CAN'T BLAME ANYONE ELSE, 1218 00:56:10,137 --> 00:56:12,448 AND IT'S ULTIMATELY YOUR FAULT. 1219 00:56:12,448 --> 00:56:15,000 YOU LEFT THE SUPPORT SYSTEM YOU HAD HERE, 1220 00:56:15,000 --> 00:56:18,103 SO YOU'RE LETTING ALL THE STRESS OF THINGS YOU TALK ABOUT 1221 00:56:18,103 --> 00:56:20,758 LEAD YOU BACK TO USING FOOD TO COPE. 1222 00:56:20,758 --> 00:56:22,241 RIGHT.SO, RIGHT NOW, 1223 00:56:22,241 --> 00:56:24,000 WE NEED YOU TO DO PSYCHOTHERAPY 1224 00:56:24,000 --> 00:56:27,137 TO TRY TO PREVENT THIS FROM GETTING ANY WORSE. 1225 00:56:27,137 --> 00:56:28,310 OKAY. 1226 00:56:28,310 --> 00:56:30,931 WHAT ABOUT SKIN REMOVAL? I WAS HOPING TO GET THAT. 1227 00:56:30,931 --> 00:56:32,620 LIKE, THAT'S MY GOAL. 1228 00:56:32,620 --> 00:56:34,724 YOU'RE NOT EVEN REMOTELY CLOSE 1229 00:56:34,724 --> 00:56:37,275 TO BEING WHERE YOU NEED TO ASK ME THAT. 1230 00:56:37,275 --> 00:56:38,758 WHAT YOU NEED TO DO RIGHT NOW 1231 00:56:38,758 --> 00:56:41,068 IS TO FOCUS ON YOUR PSYCHOTHERAPY 1232 00:56:41,068 --> 00:56:44,068 AND DEAL WITH YOUR EMOTIONS BECAUSE, IF YOU DON'T, 1233 00:56:44,068 --> 00:56:46,586 YOU'RE GONNA START GAINING AGAIN VERY SOON. 1234 00:56:46,586 --> 00:56:48,413 YOU UNDERSTAND ME? 1235 00:56:48,413 --> 00:56:49,689 YES. 1236 00:56:49,689 --> 00:56:51,517 OKAY, SO WHAT I'M GONNA DO 1237 00:56:51,517 --> 00:56:54,413 IS FIND A THERAPIST FOR YOU IN OHIO 1238 00:56:54,413 --> 00:56:56,655 SO YOU CAN START TO WORK ON YOUR ISSUES 1239 00:56:56,655 --> 00:56:59,655 TO SEE IF WE CAN GET YOU BACK ON TRACK. 1240 00:56:59,655 --> 00:57:00,827 -OKAY. -ALL RIGHT. 1241 00:57:00,827 --> 00:57:02,689 YOU NEED TO TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY 1242 00:57:02,689 --> 00:57:05,551 IF YOU WANT ANY CHANCE TO STOP GAINING AGAIN 1243 00:57:05,551 --> 00:57:09,000 AND GETTING BACK TO 700 POUNDS, OKAY? 1244 00:57:09,000 --> 00:57:10,620 ALL RIGHT. I'LL SEE YOU ALL LATER. 1245 00:57:10,620 --> 00:57:11,793 ALL RIGHT. THANK YOU. 1246 00:57:11,793 --> 00:57:13,448 -HAVE A SAFE TRIP BACK. -NICE TO SEE YOU. 1247 00:57:15,965 --> 00:57:19,482 Dr. Nowzaradan: NICOLE IS HEADED IN A BAD DIRECTION RIGHT NOW. 1248 00:57:19,482 --> 00:57:22,344 SHE GOT OVERCONFIDENT AND DIDN'T LISTEN, 1249 00:57:22,344 --> 00:57:26,000 AND NOW IF WE DON'T DO SOMETHING TO GET AHEAD OF THIS, 1250 00:57:26,000 --> 00:57:29,344 SHE WILL START GAINING AGAIN IN A FEW MONTHS, 1251 00:57:29,344 --> 00:57:33,103 AND AFTER THAT, HER WEIGHT GAIN WILL INCREASE RAPIDLY, 1252 00:57:33,103 --> 00:57:36,379 SO SHE NEEDS TO START PSYCHOTHERAPY 1253 00:57:36,379 --> 00:57:39,655 BECAUSE IF SHE DOESN'T LEARN TO DEAL WITH HER EMOTIONS 1254 00:57:39,655 --> 00:57:41,206 IN HEALTHY WAY, 1255 00:57:41,206 --> 00:57:44,482 THEN SHE'S JUST GOING TO CONTINUE TO RUN TO FOOD, 1256 00:57:44,482 --> 00:57:46,793 AND THERE WILL BE NO WAY TO PREVENT HER 1257 00:57:46,793 --> 00:57:49,517 FROM GETTING WORSE AND GAINING AGAIN. 1258 00:57:52,482 --> 00:57:55,655 Nicole: TODAY DIDN'T GO EXACTLY AS I WAS HOPING, 1259 00:57:55,655 --> 00:58:00,275 BUT I'M HAPPY HE DIDN'T TELL ME I WAS DONE WITH THE PROGRAM. 1260 00:58:00,275 --> 00:58:02,241 AND HE WANTS ME TO START THERAPY, 1261 00:58:02,241 --> 00:58:05,344 BUT I'M NOT SURE HOW I FEEL ABOUT THAT, 1262 00:58:05,344 --> 00:58:08,206 BUT I DEFINITELY DON'T WANT TO START GAINING, 1263 00:58:08,206 --> 00:58:11,344 SO I'LL DO WHATEVER I HAVE TO TO STAY ON HIS PROGRAM 1264 00:58:11,344 --> 00:58:13,413 AND KEEP MAKING PROGRESS. 1265 00:58:13,413 --> 00:58:20,206 ♪♪ 1266 00:58:20,206 --> 00:58:23,793 TODAY IS THE DAY I GET TO SEE MY DAD. 1267 00:58:23,793 --> 00:58:25,137 MY DAD'S SUFFERING OF CANCER, 1268 00:58:25,137 --> 00:58:27,275 AND HE HAS LESS THAN A YEAR TO LIVE, 1269 00:58:27,275 --> 00:58:30,103 AND HE'S FACING A LOT OF JAIL TIME, 1270 00:58:30,103 --> 00:58:33,482 AND I'VE MISSED HIM SO MUCH, AND MY HEART IS IN PIECES 1271 00:58:33,482 --> 00:58:36,689 THINKING ABOUT HIM DYING IN JAIL. 1272 00:58:36,689 --> 00:58:38,206 I'M REALLY NERVOUS BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW 1273 00:58:38,206 --> 00:58:41,586 WHAT IT'S GONNA BE LIKE SEEING HIM. 1274 00:58:41,586 --> 00:58:43,172 WE HAVE OUR PROBLEMS, 1275 00:58:43,172 --> 00:58:47,275 BUT TO THINK THIS MIGHT BE THE LAST TIME THAT I SEE HIM 1276 00:58:47,275 --> 00:58:49,241 BREAKS MY HEART. 1277 00:58:49,241 --> 00:58:53,068 I'VE SPENT THE LAST FIVE MONTHS TRYING TO GET AWAY FROM HIM, 1278 00:58:53,068 --> 00:58:58,103 AND NOW I'M DESPERATE TO SEE HIM AND SPEND TIME WITH HIM. 1279 00:58:58,103 --> 00:58:59,724 I HOPE HE TELLS ME THAT HE'S PROUD OF ME, 1280 00:58:59,724 --> 00:59:01,517 AND HE GIVES ME ADVICE -- 1281 00:59:01,517 --> 00:59:04,482 MAYBE SOMETHING THAT WILL PUSH ME THROUGH. 1282 00:59:04,482 --> 00:59:08,620 THIS ISN'T THE FIRST TIME I'M GONNA VISIT MY DAD IN JAIL, 1283 00:59:08,620 --> 00:59:10,793 BUT IT MIGHT BE THE LAST. 1284 00:59:10,793 --> 00:59:18,206 ♪♪ 1285 00:59:18,206 --> 00:59:20,758 THE VISIT WITH MY FATHER WENT REALLY GOOD. 1286 00:59:20,758 --> 00:59:24,724 HE NOTICED RIGHT AWAY HOW MUCH WEIGHT I'VE LOST. 1287 00:59:24,724 --> 00:59:26,931 WHEN I WAS TALKING TO MY DAD, HE SAYS, 1288 00:59:26,931 --> 00:59:29,034 "YOU REALLY NEED TO STOP WORRYING ABOUT ME." 1289 00:59:29,034 --> 00:59:30,379 YEAH. 1290 00:59:30,379 --> 00:59:32,137 HE SAID, "IT'S TIME FOR YOU TO FOCUS ON YOURSELF," 1291 00:59:32,137 --> 00:59:34,344 AND HE SAYS, "YOU'VE LOST SO MUCH WEIGHT. 1292 00:59:34,344 --> 00:59:36,241 YOU LOOK BETTER THAN YOU EVER HAVE." 1293 00:59:36,241 --> 00:59:37,448 AND YOU DO. 1294 00:59:37,448 --> 00:59:39,034 AND HE SAID, "I AM SO PROUD OF YOU," 1295 00:59:39,034 --> 00:59:42,655 AND, LIKE, IT JUST MADE ME FEEL AMAZING INSIDE 1296 00:59:42,655 --> 00:59:46,551 BECAUSE, LIKE, NOW I FEEL LIKE I CAN JUST FOCUS ON ME 1297 00:59:46,551 --> 00:59:48,655 AND THEM KIDS AND OUR RELATIONSHIP 1298 00:59:48,655 --> 00:59:51,034 AND JUST TAKE EVERYTHING TO THE NEXT LEVEL. 1299 00:59:51,034 --> 00:59:54,413 HE WAS LIKE, "LOOK HOW FAR YOU'VE CAME THIS YEAR." 1300 00:59:54,413 --> 00:59:55,793 [ Voice breaking ] I LOVE MY DAD SO MUCH. 1301 00:59:55,793 --> 00:59:58,655 I KNOW YOU DO, NIKKI. IT'S JUST... 1302 00:59:58,655 --> 01:00:01,241 IT JUST SUCKS THAT 1303 01:00:01,241 --> 01:00:03,862 HE'S IN THIS SITUATION AND THIS PREDICAMENT. 1304 01:00:03,862 --> 01:00:05,793 I JUST TOUCHED, LIKE, HIS HAND THROUGH THE GLASS. 1305 01:00:05,793 --> 01:00:06,689 YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT? 1306 01:00:06,689 --> 01:00:07,965 YEAH. 1307 01:00:07,965 --> 01:00:09,965 AND HE TOLD ME -- HE SAYS, 1308 01:00:09,965 --> 01:00:12,034 "IF THIS IS THE LAST TIME THAT I SEE YOU," 1309 01:00:12,034 --> 01:00:14,172 HE SAID, "I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT I LOVE YOU, 1310 01:00:14,172 --> 01:00:15,655 AND I'VE ALWAYS LOVED YOU, 1311 01:00:15,655 --> 01:00:18,724 AND I'M PROUD OF EVERYTHING THAT YOU'VE EVER DONE." 1312 01:00:22,241 --> 01:00:24,241 THIS IS THE VISIT I REALLY NEEDED. 1313 01:00:24,241 --> 01:00:25,965 YEAH. 1314 01:00:25,965 --> 01:00:28,758 Nicole: I DON'T KNOW HOW I'M GONNA SURVIVE BACK HOME IN OHIO, 1315 01:00:28,758 --> 01:00:31,379 THINKING ABOUT HIM DYING HERE IN TEXAS, 1316 01:00:31,379 --> 01:00:33,931 BUT IF THIS IS THE LAST TIME I SEE MY DAD, 1317 01:00:33,931 --> 01:00:36,827 THIS IS THE WAY THAT I WOULD WANT THE VISIT TO GO, 1318 01:00:36,827 --> 01:00:38,965 AND I'M SO THANKFUL FOR IT. 1319 01:00:38,965 --> 01:00:44,758 SO I'M GONNA TAKE HIS ADVICE AND FOCUS ON MYSELF. 1320 01:00:44,758 --> 01:00:47,931 RIGHT NOW EVERYTHING IN MY LIFE FEELS CHAOTIC, 1321 01:00:47,931 --> 01:00:50,931 AND I NEED A WAY TO COPE WITH ALL OF IT. 1322 01:00:50,931 --> 01:00:54,689 I KNOW THERAPY IS WHAT I REALLY NEED TO FIGURE OUT MY EMOTIONS 1323 01:00:54,689 --> 01:00:56,862 AND FIND A WAY FORWARD. 1324 01:00:56,862 --> 01:01:02,275 ♪♪ 1325 01:01:02,275 --> 01:01:07,620 ♪♪ 1326 01:01:07,620 --> 01:01:09,896 Ashley: MY MOTHER-IN-LAW AND ME ARE HEADED BACK TO DR. NOW'S 1327 01:01:09,896 --> 01:01:11,862 FOR MY NEXT APPOINTMENT, 1328 01:01:11,862 --> 01:01:14,689 AND I'M ALWAYS A LITTLE ANXIOUS, A LITTLE NERVOUS, 1329 01:01:14,689 --> 01:01:17,344 WHEN I GO SEE DR. NOWZARADAN, 1330 01:01:17,344 --> 01:01:20,206 BUT THIS TIME I KNOW HOW HARD I'VE WORKED, 1331 01:01:20,206 --> 01:01:21,655 SO IF I'M NOT WHERE I NEED, 1332 01:01:21,655 --> 01:01:25,241 IT'S GONNA BE EXTREMELY DISCOURAGING 1333 01:01:25,241 --> 01:01:28,862 BECAUSE I'M DOING THE BEST I CAN RIGHT NOW, 1334 01:01:28,862 --> 01:01:33,586 SO I REALLY NEED TO SEE A RESULT OF THAT ON THE SCALE TODAY. 1335 01:01:33,586 --> 01:01:35,620 THE LAST TIME I WAS HERE WAS THREE MONTHS AGO, 1336 01:01:35,620 --> 01:01:37,931 AND I WAS UP TO 403, 1337 01:01:37,931 --> 01:01:39,793 AND DR. NOW SAYS I SHOULD BE LOSING 1338 01:01:39,793 --> 01:01:42,551 AT LEAST 20 POUNDS A MONTH, 1339 01:01:42,551 --> 01:01:46,862 SO THAT MEANS I NEED TO BE BELOW 343 TODAY, 1340 01:01:46,862 --> 01:01:49,103 AND IF I DID THAT, IT WILL ALSO MEAN 1341 01:01:49,103 --> 01:01:50,931 I'M BELOW WHERE DR. NOW SAID I NEEDED TO BE 1342 01:01:50,931 --> 01:01:52,586 TO GET SKIN REMOVAL. 1343 01:01:52,586 --> 01:01:59,896 ♪♪ 1344 01:01:59,896 --> 01:02:02,137 I FEEL REALLY RELIEVED RIGHT NOW. 1345 01:02:04,517 --> 01:02:06,620 IT'S BEEN A LONG TIME SINCE I WEIGHED THIS LITTLE, 1346 01:02:06,620 --> 01:02:09,689 AND I JUST HOPE DR. NOW IS HAPPY WITH IT, 1347 01:02:09,689 --> 01:02:11,448 BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GONNA HAPPEN RIGHT NOW 1348 01:02:11,448 --> 01:02:13,103 BECAUSE I KNOW IT'S TAKEN ME A WHILE 1349 01:02:13,103 --> 01:02:15,827 TO GET DOWN TO THIS WEIGHT. 1350 01:02:15,827 --> 01:02:17,379 AND I'M WORRIED I'M NOT GONNA GET APPROVED 1351 01:02:17,379 --> 01:02:18,689 FOR SURGERY, OF COURSE. 1352 01:02:18,689 --> 01:02:20,103 YOU KNOW, I'M ALWAYS WORRIED 1353 01:02:20,103 --> 01:02:21,689 IF I'M NOT GONNA GET APPROVED FOR SURGERY 1354 01:02:21,689 --> 01:02:23,517 IF IT'S NOT EXACTLY WHAT HE WANTED. 1355 01:02:23,517 --> 01:02:25,000 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 1356 01:02:25,000 --> 01:02:26,758 -HELLO. HOW Y'ALL DOING? -HI, DR. NOW. 1357 01:02:26,758 --> 01:02:28,206 Gayla: FINE. HOW ARE YOU? 1358 01:02:28,206 --> 01:02:29,793 Dr. Nowzaradan: I'M DOING GOOD. 1359 01:02:29,793 --> 01:02:34,655 SO, ASHLEY, YOU'RE DOWN TO 346, 1360 01:02:34,655 --> 01:02:38,241 SO OVER PAST THREE MONTHS, YOU LOST 57 POUNDS, 1361 01:02:38,241 --> 01:02:40,758 SO YOU'RE BACK ON TRACK. THAT'S GREAT. 1362 01:02:40,758 --> 01:02:42,862 THAT'S A BIG STEP FOR YOU, HUH? 1363 01:02:42,862 --> 01:02:44,448 MM-HMM. 1364 01:02:44,448 --> 01:02:46,689 SO I TAKE IT YOU'RE DOING PRETTY WELL WITH YOUR DIET. 1365 01:02:46,689 --> 01:02:48,413 I'VE BEEN DOING PRETTY GOOD ON IT, 1366 01:02:48,413 --> 01:02:49,931 AND I HAVEN'T CHEATED ONCE. 1367 01:02:49,931 --> 01:02:52,068 AND YOU HAVE BEEN ABLE TO DO THAT 1368 01:02:52,068 --> 01:02:55,034 BECAUSE YOU HAVE BEEN STICKING TO YOUR PSYCHOTHERAPY. 1369 01:02:55,034 --> 01:02:59,000 SO ARE YOU GOING TO STICK WITH IT THIS TIME AND KEEP GOING? 1370 01:02:59,000 --> 01:03:00,655 -YES, SIR. -SUPER. 1371 01:03:00,655 --> 01:03:02,241 SO HOW IS EXTRA SKIN FEELING? 1372 01:03:02,241 --> 01:03:04,310 IS IT GETTING HARD TO DEAL WITH IT? 1373 01:03:04,310 --> 01:03:07,241 YES, SIR, DR. NOWZARADAN. 1374 01:03:07,241 --> 01:03:09,896 IT'S -- IT'S A STRUGGLE. YES. 1375 01:03:09,896 --> 01:03:12,448 IT'S GETTING TOUGHER AND TOUGHER TO DEAL WITH. 1376 01:03:12,448 --> 01:03:14,241 YOUR ACTIVITY HAS NOT... 1377 01:03:14,241 --> 01:03:16,379 IT'S SLOWED MY ACTIVITY DOWN A LOT. 1378 01:03:16,379 --> 01:03:18,448 WELL, LET ME GET YOU TO STAND UP 1379 01:03:18,448 --> 01:03:21,379 AND SEE HOW DOES IT... 1380 01:03:27,068 --> 01:03:30,344 ALL RIGHT. SO I CAN SEE HOW THIS BOTHERS YOU. 1381 01:03:30,344 --> 01:03:36,413 THIS IS GOING TO BE A REALLY MAJOR PROBLEM 1382 01:03:36,413 --> 01:03:39,103 FOR YOU TO CARRY THIS WEIGHT AROUND. 1383 01:03:39,103 --> 01:03:41,655 THIS IS A LOT HANGING IN YOUR ABDOMEN. 1384 01:03:41,655 --> 01:03:44,724 AND DEFINITELY TAKING THIS OFF OF HERE 1385 01:03:44,724 --> 01:03:46,862 IS GONNA BE A HELP. 1386 01:03:46,862 --> 01:03:52,241 SO YOU'RE GETTING TO THE POINT THAT TAKING OFF THIS MASS 1387 01:03:52,241 --> 01:03:55,965 IS GONNA HELP YOU WITH MOBILITY. 1388 01:03:55,965 --> 01:03:58,758 IT'S GONNA BE A POSITIVE THING FOR YOU. 1389 01:03:58,758 --> 01:04:01,172 SO SINCE YOU GOT BELOW 350, 1390 01:04:01,172 --> 01:04:05,000 I'M GOING TO APPROVE YOU FOR SKIN-REMOVAL SURGERY, OKAY? 1391 01:04:05,000 --> 01:04:06,275 THANK YOU, DR. NOWZARADAN. 1392 01:04:06,275 --> 01:04:07,448 OH, YOU'RE WELCOME. 1393 01:04:07,448 --> 01:04:09,275 THIS SHOULD BE A BIG HELP FOR YOU 1394 01:04:09,275 --> 01:04:11,448 BECAUSE THIS PROBABLY WILL BE 1395 01:04:11,448 --> 01:04:13,896 AT LEAST 30, 40 POUND OF WEIGHT, 1396 01:04:13,896 --> 01:04:16,827 SO THIS WILL BE A BIG IMPROVEMENT FOR YOU, 1397 01:04:16,827 --> 01:04:19,758 BUT I'M GONNA SCHEDULE IT FOR TWO MONTHS FROM NOW 1398 01:04:19,758 --> 01:04:21,724 BECAUSE I WANT TO SEE YOU SHOW ME 1399 01:04:21,724 --> 01:04:24,655 THAT YOU'RE NOT GONNA GET COMFORTABLE AGAIN, 1400 01:04:24,655 --> 01:04:26,620 AND THAT WILL ALSO GIVE YOU TIME 1401 01:04:26,620 --> 01:04:28,724 TO FIGURE OUT CARE FOR PATRICK 1402 01:04:28,724 --> 01:04:31,620 BECAUSE YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO DO MUCH FOR A BIT. 1403 01:04:31,620 --> 01:04:33,172 THAT SOUND OKAY? 1404 01:04:33,172 --> 01:04:34,793 YES, SIR. THANK YOU. 1405 01:04:34,793 --> 01:04:37,965 SO THIS WAY, YOU'RE GONNA BE IN MUCH BETTER SHAPE, OKAY? 1406 01:04:37,965 --> 01:04:39,241 MM-HMM. 1407 01:04:39,241 --> 01:04:40,965 THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH, DR. NOWZARADAN. 1408 01:04:40,965 --> 01:04:42,310 -YOU'RE QUITE WELCOME. -THANK YOU. 1409 01:04:42,310 --> 01:04:44,034 OKAY. 1410 01:04:46,482 --> 01:04:48,758 Dr. Nowzaradan: I'M IMPRESSED WITH ASHLEY'S PROGRESS 1411 01:04:48,758 --> 01:04:50,103 THESE PAST THREE MONTHS 1412 01:04:50,103 --> 01:04:52,310 AND THAT SHE HAS BEEN CONSISTENTLY 1413 01:04:52,310 --> 01:04:56,896 GOING TO HER PSYCHOTHERAPY AGAIN TO WORK ON HER EMOTIONAL ISSUES, 1414 01:04:56,896 --> 01:04:59,965 SO I FEEL LIKE SHE'S IN A MUCH BETTER PLACE, 1415 01:04:59,965 --> 01:05:03,551 AND SHE'S READY FOR HER FIRST SKIN SURGERY, 1416 01:05:03,551 --> 01:05:05,310 BUT I WANT TO WAIT TWO MONTHS 1417 01:05:05,310 --> 01:05:08,103 TO MAKE SURE SHE CONTINUES TO LOSE 1418 01:05:08,103 --> 01:05:11,586 AND THAT SHE WASN'T JUST WORKING HARD TO GET APPROVED. 1419 01:05:11,586 --> 01:05:15,103 SO IF SHE SHOWS UP, AND SHE HAS STARTED TO GAIN 1420 01:05:15,103 --> 01:05:18,793 OR HASN'T LOST MUCH, THEN WE'LL CANCEL THE SURGERY. 1421 01:05:20,896 --> 01:05:24,103 Ashley: THIS IS THE GOAL I'VE WORKED TO HIT FOR SO LONG, 1422 01:05:24,103 --> 01:05:26,034 AND FINALLY GETTING ALL THIS WEIGHT OFF MY STOMACH 1423 01:05:26,034 --> 01:05:28,827 IS GONNA BE COMPLETELY LIFE-CHANGING 1424 01:05:28,827 --> 01:05:31,000 AND SUCH A HUGE STEP FOR ME, 1425 01:05:31,000 --> 01:05:32,275 SO I JUST CAN'T WAIT. 1426 01:05:39,793 --> 01:05:46,793 ♪♪ 1427 01:05:46,793 --> 01:05:53,827 ♪♪ 1428 01:05:53,827 --> 01:05:55,344 Nicole: I'M HEADED TO SEE A THERAPIST 1429 01:05:55,344 --> 01:05:59,620 THAT DR. NOW HAS BEEN TELLING ME I NEED TO START GOING TO, 1430 01:05:59,620 --> 01:06:03,172 BUT I'M NOT REALLY SURE HOW I FEEL ABOUT IT. 1431 01:06:03,172 --> 01:06:07,241 I KNOW MY STRESS AND EMOTIONS OVERWHELM ME A LOT, 1432 01:06:07,241 --> 01:06:09,931 BUT I DON'T THINK IT'S THAT SIMPLE 1433 01:06:09,931 --> 01:06:11,517 'CAUSE A LOT OF MY STRUGGLE 1434 01:06:11,517 --> 01:06:14,586 IS CHARLIE BRINGING STUFF IN THE HOUSE THAT ISN'T HEALTHY, 1435 01:06:14,586 --> 01:06:17,068 AND THAT MAKES IT HARDER, 1436 01:06:17,068 --> 01:06:18,344 BUT I'M WILLING TO TRY THIS 1437 01:06:18,344 --> 01:06:21,758 AND SEE WHAT HELP THEY CAN GIVE ME 1438 01:06:21,758 --> 01:06:23,965 BECAUSE I REALLY WANT TO LOSE WHAT I NEED 1439 01:06:23,965 --> 01:06:26,896 AND TRY TO KEEP MAKING PROGRESS, 1440 01:06:26,896 --> 01:06:28,862 TO KEEP GETTING DR. NOW'S HELP 1441 01:06:28,862 --> 01:06:31,275 AND TO HOPEFULLY GET SKIN SURGERY. 1442 01:06:33,103 --> 01:06:34,137 NICOLE? 1443 01:06:34,137 --> 01:06:35,310 HI. -HI. 1444 01:06:35,310 --> 01:06:37,689 I'M CANDACE. NICE TO MEET YOU. 1445 01:06:37,689 --> 01:06:39,517 COME ON BACK. WE'RE GONNA GO STRAIGHT. 1446 01:06:39,517 --> 01:06:40,862 ALL RIGHT. 1447 01:06:40,862 --> 01:06:44,241 Nicole: SO IF THIS IS WHAT I NEED TO DO, I WILL. 1448 01:06:44,241 --> 01:06:46,068 I DON'T EVEN REALLY KNOW WHERE TO START 1449 01:06:46,068 --> 01:06:49,862 IF I'M GONNA TALK ABOUT ALL THE THINGS IN MY LIFE, 1450 01:06:49,862 --> 01:06:51,793 BUT I'LL TRY. 1451 01:06:51,793 --> 01:06:54,620 MAYBE IT'LL GIVE ME SOME TOOLS TO HELP ME, 1452 01:06:54,620 --> 01:06:56,862 AND I'LL HAVE A BREAKTHROUGH TODAY. 1453 01:06:56,862 --> 01:06:59,241 SO WHAT BROUGHT YOU IN TODAY? 1454 01:06:59,241 --> 01:07:02,862 WELL, I'VE BEEN ON A WEIGHT-LOSS JOURNEY FOR OVER A YEAR, 1455 01:07:02,862 --> 01:07:05,517 AND I'VE LOST CLOSE TO 400 POUNDS. 1456 01:07:05,517 --> 01:07:07,034 OH, AMAZING. CONGRATULATIONS. 1457 01:07:07,034 --> 01:07:08,206 THANK YOU. 1458 01:07:08,206 --> 01:07:10,586 BUT I WASN'T RAISED IN THE PROPER HOME, 1459 01:07:10,586 --> 01:07:14,793 AND I WAS AROUND DRUG ADDICTS MY ENTIRE LIFE. 1460 01:07:14,793 --> 01:07:16,344 MY DAD WAS ALWAYS IN AND OUT OF JAIL, 1461 01:07:16,344 --> 01:07:18,724 IN AND OUT OF PRISON MY ENTIRE LIFE, 1462 01:07:18,724 --> 01:07:21,172 AND NOW HE'S FACING UP TO 10 YEARS IN PRISON. 1463 01:07:21,172 --> 01:07:22,344 OKAY. 1464 01:07:22,344 --> 01:07:24,034 AND ON TOP OF THAT, 1465 01:07:24,034 --> 01:07:27,758 HE GOT DIAGNOSED WITH PANCREATIC CANCER, 1466 01:07:27,758 --> 01:07:30,620 AND HE HAS LESS THAN A YEAR TO LIVE, 1467 01:07:30,620 --> 01:07:35,034 AND I DON'T KNOW IF I'LL EVER EVEN SEE HIS FACE AGAIN, 1468 01:07:35,034 --> 01:07:38,103 AND SO I'M TAKING THAT STRESS ON, 1469 01:07:38,103 --> 01:07:39,931 AND SO I'VE BEEN RETURNING TO FOOD 1470 01:07:39,931 --> 01:07:43,137 BECAUSE THAT'S THE ONLY COMFORT 1471 01:07:43,137 --> 01:07:44,827 THAT I'VE HAD MY ENTIRE LIFE. 1472 01:07:44,827 --> 01:07:47,620 MY PARENTS WERE ADDICTED TO DRUGS, 1473 01:07:47,620 --> 01:07:51,000 AND NOW I'M BATTLING AN ADDICTION WITH FOOD. 1474 01:07:51,000 --> 01:07:53,931 AND THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT WE'LL FOCUS ON, THEN. 1475 01:07:53,931 --> 01:07:56,344 WHICH COPING SKILLS WERE YOU USING 1476 01:07:56,344 --> 01:07:58,896 OR ARE YOU CURRENTLY USING? 1477 01:07:58,896 --> 01:08:01,965 RIGHT NOW I DON'T EVEN DO ANYTHING TO COPE WITH ANYTHING. 1478 01:08:01,965 --> 01:08:04,068 I JUST LET IT JUST BUILD UP AND BUILD UP. 1479 01:08:04,068 --> 01:08:05,172 YOU LET IT BUILD UP. 1480 01:08:05,172 --> 01:08:07,965 AND THEN I USUALLY JUST, LIKE, SNAP, 1481 01:08:07,965 --> 01:08:09,965 AND THEN JUST, LIKE, I HAVE ANGER, 1482 01:08:09,965 --> 01:08:12,758 AND IT'S USUALLY TOWARDS, LIKE, MY FIANCé, 1483 01:08:12,758 --> 01:08:13,931 AND, YOU KNOW, THAT'S NOT THE -- 1484 01:08:13,931 --> 01:08:15,137 THE EASY TARGET. MM-HMM. 1485 01:08:15,137 --> 01:08:16,172 YEAH, AND THAT'S NOT THE BEST WAY 1486 01:08:16,172 --> 01:08:17,379 BECAUSE, AT THE END, 1487 01:08:17,379 --> 01:08:18,793 HE'S THE ONE THAT'S BEEN HERE FOR ME THE MOST 1488 01:08:18,793 --> 01:08:21,103 AND THE ONE THAT'S HELPED ME IN MY JOURNEY. 1489 01:08:21,103 --> 01:08:22,344 HE'S MY ROCK. 1490 01:08:22,344 --> 01:08:24,448 YOUR GO-TO SUPPORT PERSON IS CHARLIE. 1491 01:08:24,448 --> 01:08:25,724 WHO ELSE? 1492 01:08:25,724 --> 01:08:27,655 WHO ELSE WOULD BE YOUR SUPPORT "PEOPLE"? 1493 01:08:27,655 --> 01:08:30,862 UGH. HONESTLY, MY DAD, AS CRAZY AS THAT SOUNDS, 1494 01:08:30,862 --> 01:08:34,413 BECAUSE EVEN THOUGH MY DAD WAS SO DRUGGED OUT, 1495 01:08:34,413 --> 01:08:36,689 WHEN HE WOULD COME OFF HIS HIGH, 1496 01:08:36,689 --> 01:08:39,793 HE WOULD COME TO MY ROOM, AND WE WOULD TALK FOR HOURS, 1497 01:08:39,793 --> 01:08:42,068 AND, I MEAN, WE JUST -- WE ALWAYS HAD THAT CLOSE BOND, 1498 01:08:42,068 --> 01:08:44,310 AND I MISS IT A LOT.SURE. 1499 01:08:44,310 --> 01:08:46,068 AND HE TOLD ME THINGS 1500 01:08:46,068 --> 01:08:49,379 THAT JUST REALLY KEEP ME GOING IN LIFE. 1501 01:08:49,379 --> 01:08:53,482 SO IT SOUNDS TO ME LIKE WHEN YOU WERE RAISED, 1502 01:08:53,482 --> 01:08:56,931 YOU WERE ALREADY DEALING WITH A LOT OF BEHAVIORS 1503 01:08:56,931 --> 01:08:59,724 THAT MAYBE DIDN'T MAKE A WHOLE LOT OF SENSE TO YOU, 1504 01:08:59,724 --> 01:09:02,379 SO WE'RE GONNA PROCESS THOSE FEELINGS 1505 01:09:02,379 --> 01:09:06,000 AND ADD ON TO SOME OF THOSE COPING SKILLS. 1506 01:09:06,000 --> 01:09:07,827 WHEN WE GET TO COPING SKILLS, 1507 01:09:07,827 --> 01:09:09,724 I LIKE TO USE MINDFULNESS IMAGERY, 1508 01:09:09,724 --> 01:09:11,620 SO POSITIVE THOUGHTS.OKAY. 1509 01:09:11,620 --> 01:09:13,103 YOUR FIRST ASSIGNMENT'S GONNA BE 1510 01:09:13,103 --> 01:09:14,862 TO COME UP WITH YOUR HAPPY PLACE... 1511 01:09:14,862 --> 01:09:16,000 OKAY. 1512 01:09:16,000 --> 01:09:17,586 ...BECAUSE THAT POSITIVE IMAGERY 1513 01:09:17,586 --> 01:09:20,310 WILL GET OUR HEART RATE BACK DOWN TO WHERE IT NEEDS TO BE. 1514 01:09:20,310 --> 01:09:22,413 YOU'RE MAKING RATIONAL DECISIONS AGAIN, 1515 01:09:22,413 --> 01:09:24,137 SO THOSE ARE THE TYPE OF SKILLS, 1516 01:09:24,137 --> 01:09:26,344 AND I'M GONNA HAVE YOU PRACTICE THEM 1517 01:09:26,344 --> 01:09:30,034 WHILE YOU'RE NOT FEELING ANXIOUS OR CONFUSED OR ANGRY 1518 01:09:30,034 --> 01:09:32,241 OR ONE OF THESE NEGATIVE THOUGHTS 1519 01:09:32,241 --> 01:09:33,793 SO YOU GET REALLY GOOD AT IT. 1520 01:09:33,793 --> 01:09:35,172 OKAY. 1521 01:09:35,172 --> 01:09:37,310 I WANT YOU TO COME UP WITH THAT HAPPY PLACE, 1522 01:09:37,310 --> 01:09:38,724 AND IF YOU'RE NOT ABLE TO GET THERE, 1523 01:09:38,724 --> 01:09:39,827 WE'LL PRACTICE IT.OKAY. 1524 01:09:39,827 --> 01:09:41,275 WE'LL PRACTICE IT NEXT SESSION, OKAY? 1525 01:09:41,275 --> 01:09:42,896 OKAY. 1526 01:09:42,896 --> 01:09:44,172 SO WE'LL SCHEDULE THAT...THANK YOU SO MUCH. 1527 01:09:44,172 --> 01:09:46,000 ...AND WE'LL SEE YOU NEXT SESSION. 1528 01:09:48,862 --> 01:09:51,137 Nicole: THAT DID FEEL REALLY GOOD 1529 01:09:51,137 --> 01:09:54,103 BECAUSE I THINK I'VE HAD SO MUCH BOTTLED UP 1530 01:09:54,103 --> 01:09:55,793 THAT I DIDN'T REALIZE HOW BADLY 1531 01:09:55,793 --> 01:09:57,655 I NEEDED TO LET SOME OF THAT OUT. 1532 01:09:57,655 --> 01:09:59,586 THANK YOU. 1533 01:09:59,586 --> 01:10:02,206 Nicole: SO I'M GONNA DO WHAT THE THERAPIST TOLD ME, 1534 01:10:02,206 --> 01:10:04,517 AND I'M GONNA WORK TO FIND A HAPPY PLACE 1535 01:10:04,517 --> 01:10:07,517 WHERE I CAN BE POSITIVE. 1536 01:10:07,517 --> 01:10:10,517 I DON'T KNOW WHERE THAT IS OR HOW IT'LL EVEN WORK, 1537 01:10:10,517 --> 01:10:14,068 BUT I'LL TRY. 1538 01:10:14,068 --> 01:10:16,206 BUT I'M GONNA LEARN HOW TO COPE WITH NEGATIVITY 1539 01:10:16,206 --> 01:10:18,689 SO THAT I DON'T HAVE TO FACTOR IN EATING 1540 01:10:18,689 --> 01:10:21,068 TO COPE WITH MY NEGATIVITY, 1541 01:10:21,068 --> 01:10:23,344 AND IT'S NOT GONNA BE EASY, 1542 01:10:23,344 --> 01:10:24,931 BUT I NEED TO KEEP PUSHING FORWARD 1543 01:10:24,931 --> 01:10:27,551 TO BE ABLE TO DO EVERYTHING THAT I WANT TO DO. 1544 01:10:27,551 --> 01:10:36,724 ♪♪ 1545 01:10:36,724 --> 01:10:45,931 ♪♪ 1546 01:10:45,931 --> 01:10:48,241 Ashley: TODAY'S THE DAY I'M FINALLY GETTING THE HANGING SKIN 1547 01:10:48,241 --> 01:10:50,448 CUT OFF MY STOMACH. 1548 01:10:50,448 --> 01:10:53,275 IT'S BEEN ALMOST TWO YEARS SINCE I'VE BEEN ON THIS JOURNEY, 1549 01:10:53,275 --> 01:10:55,862 AND I'VE SPENT OVER A YEAR JUST TRYING TO GET TO THE POINT 1550 01:10:55,862 --> 01:10:59,000 WHERE I CAN GET MY STOMACH SKIN REMOVED. 1551 01:10:59,000 --> 01:11:01,758 I KNOW IT'LL TAKE A WHILE TO RECOVER, 1552 01:11:01,758 --> 01:11:04,241 BUT JUST THINKING ABOUT NOT HAVING THAT APRON PUSHED BACK 1553 01:11:04,241 --> 01:11:06,448 AGAINST EVERY STEP I TAKE -- 1554 01:11:06,448 --> 01:11:08,724 IT'S JUST AN AMAZING THOUGHT. 1555 01:11:12,931 --> 01:11:14,896 YOU ALL RIGHT? -I'M FINE. 1556 01:11:14,896 --> 01:11:16,758 Ashley: SHOULD I WORRY ABOUT YOU? 1557 01:11:18,896 --> 01:11:20,793 Jacob: I'M PROBABLY MORE WORRIED ABOUT ASHLEY 1558 01:11:20,793 --> 01:11:23,241 HAVING THE SKIN SURGERY THAN ASHLEY IS, 1559 01:11:23,241 --> 01:11:25,310 BUT YET I UNDERSTAND THAT THIS IS GONNA HELP HER OUT 1560 01:11:25,310 --> 01:11:28,172 TREMENDOUSLY, BOTH PHYSICALLY AND EMOTIONALLY, 1561 01:11:28,172 --> 01:11:29,896 SO THIS HAS TO HAPPEN 1562 01:11:29,896 --> 01:11:32,310 FOR HER TO BE ABLE TO PROGRESS AND MOVE FORWARD. 1563 01:11:32,310 --> 01:11:34,172 ALL RIGHT, DARLING. 1564 01:11:34,172 --> 01:11:37,655 I JUST CAN'T WAIT TO WAKE UP AND ALL OF THIS BE GONE. 1565 01:11:37,655 --> 01:11:39,448 ALL RIGHT. 1566 01:11:39,448 --> 01:11:42,137 Ashley: EVEN THOUGH THIS IS HIGH-RISK SURGERY, 1567 01:11:42,137 --> 01:11:45,344 I'M MORE AFRAID OF NOT GETTING THE SURGERY 1568 01:11:45,344 --> 01:11:48,931 BECAUSE THIS IS GONNA BE LIFE-CHANGING FOR ME, 1569 01:11:48,931 --> 01:11:52,448 AND IT'S ALMOST AS IMPORTANT TO ME AS MY WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY. 1570 01:11:56,448 --> 01:11:57,827 Dr. Nowzaradan: TODAY WE ARE DOING 1571 01:11:57,827 --> 01:12:00,827 THE FIRST EXCESS-SKIN REMOVAL ON ASHLEY, 1572 01:12:00,827 --> 01:12:03,206 AND IT'S GOING TO BE A SIGNIFICANT OPERATION 1573 01:12:03,206 --> 01:12:05,517 BECAUSE WE'LL BE TAKING OFF THE EXCESS SKIN 1574 01:12:05,517 --> 01:12:07,931 HANGING AROUND HER ABDOMEN, 1575 01:12:07,931 --> 01:12:12,655 AND IT'S GOING TO BE AT LEAST 30 TO 40 POUNDS OFF HER BODY. 1576 01:12:12,655 --> 01:12:15,965 OKAY, STARTING THE FIRST INCISION. 1577 01:12:15,965 --> 01:12:18,896 Dr. Nowzaradan: AND THAT'S GOING TO MAKE A BIG DIFFERENCE FOR HER, 1578 01:12:18,896 --> 01:12:20,689 NOT JUST WITH HER ACTIVITY, 1579 01:12:20,689 --> 01:12:23,482 BUT IN HER OVERALL QUALITY OF LIFE, 1580 01:12:23,482 --> 01:12:25,758 BUT THIS IS A VERY BIG OPERATION, 1581 01:12:25,758 --> 01:12:28,655 SO WE HAVE TO BE VERY CAREFUL, 1582 01:12:28,655 --> 01:12:31,241 AND, AS ALWAYS, THERE ARE HUNDREDS OF BLOOD VESSELS 1583 01:12:31,241 --> 01:12:34,241 THAT WE HAVE TO MAKE SURE THAT WE TIE OFF 1584 01:12:34,241 --> 01:12:36,517 SO THAT THERE IS NO INTERNAL BLEEDING 1585 01:12:36,517 --> 01:12:40,034 OR ISSUES WITH RECOVERY AFTERWARDS. 1586 01:12:40,034 --> 01:12:42,103 AND WE ALSO HAVE TO WATCH AND MAKE SURE 1587 01:12:42,103 --> 01:12:45,034 THAT ASHLEY IS DOING WELL UNDER ANESTHESIA 1588 01:12:45,034 --> 01:12:47,448 BECAUSE SHE HAS A LOT OF MEDICAL ISSUES 1589 01:12:47,448 --> 01:12:49,379 OVER THE PAST TWO YEARS, 1590 01:12:49,379 --> 01:12:52,758 AND BECAUSE SHE HAS BEEN OVER 600 POUNDS FOR SO LONG, 1591 01:12:52,758 --> 01:12:56,000 ALL THAT STRAIN ON HER BODY HAS TAKEN A TOLL 1592 01:12:56,000 --> 01:12:59,103 AND MADE HER CONDITION VERY FRAGILE, 1593 01:12:59,103 --> 01:13:01,931 AND ANY NUMBER OF THING COULD CREATE 1594 01:13:01,931 --> 01:13:04,793 A LIFE-THREATENING SITUATION FOR HER. 1595 01:13:04,793 --> 01:13:08,241 SO WE HAVE TO MAKE SURE TO BE VERY CAREFUL TODAY 1596 01:13:08,241 --> 01:13:09,724 SO THAT DOESN'T HAPPEN. 1597 01:13:17,620 --> 01:13:23,689 ♪♪ 1598 01:13:23,689 --> 01:13:29,793 ♪♪ 1599 01:13:29,793 --> 01:13:31,379 Dr. Nowzaradan: WE ARE CURRENTLY REMOVING 1600 01:13:31,379 --> 01:13:34,965 THE EXCESS SKIN FROM ASHLEY AROUND HER ABDOMEN. 1601 01:13:38,827 --> 01:13:44,379 SO FAR, THINGS ARE GOING WELL, AND THERE AREN'T ANY ISSUES, 1602 01:13:44,379 --> 01:13:48,551 BUT WE STILL HAVE A LITTLE WAYS TO GO BEFORE WE ARE FINISHED. 1603 01:13:51,379 --> 01:13:54,034 Jacob: RIGHT NOW, I'M FEELING NERVOUS ABOUT THE SURGERY 1604 01:13:54,034 --> 01:13:56,413 BECAUSE ASHLEY MEANS THE WORLD TO ME. 1605 01:13:56,413 --> 01:13:58,896 I KNOW THAT THERE'S A LOT OF RISK WITH ANY SURGERY, 1606 01:13:58,896 --> 01:14:02,482 I MEAN, AND THE SMALLEST THING CAN LEAD TO A BIG PROBLEM, 1607 01:14:02,482 --> 01:14:04,620 SO I'M JUST TRYING TO STAY POSITIVE, 1608 01:14:04,620 --> 01:14:08,000 AND HOPEFULLY EVERYTHING'S GONNA BE BETTER IN THE END. 1609 01:14:08,000 --> 01:14:10,137 ♪♪ 1610 01:14:15,655 --> 01:14:19,517 WE CAN START THE SUTURE HER UP. 1611 01:14:19,517 --> 01:14:23,620 FEW MORE STITCHES, WE'LL BE DONE. 1612 01:14:23,620 --> 01:14:27,275 ALL RIGHT. ALL FINISHED. 1613 01:14:27,275 --> 01:14:29,241 Dr. Nowzaradan: THE SURGERY WENT VERY WELL. 1614 01:14:29,241 --> 01:14:31,620 WE TOOK A BIG MASS OFF OF HER STOMACH, 1615 01:14:31,620 --> 01:14:35,758 AND WE ALSO FIXED TWO LARGE HERNIAS SHE HAD. 1616 01:14:35,758 --> 01:14:37,586 THERE WERE NO COMPLICATION, 1617 01:14:37,586 --> 01:14:40,344 AND SHE'S GOING TO BE ABLE TO GET AROUND 1618 01:14:40,344 --> 01:14:43,758 AND STAY ACTIVE WITHOUT ALL THE PAIN AND DISCOMFORT 1619 01:14:43,758 --> 01:14:45,413 OF THIS WEIGHT PULLING ON HER. 1620 01:14:45,413 --> 01:14:49,241 SO TODAY SHE TOOK A BIG STEP GETTING TO HER TARGET WEIGHT, 1621 01:14:49,241 --> 01:14:50,758 AND AFTER SHE RECOVERS, 1622 01:14:50,758 --> 01:14:54,172 SHE SHOULD BE GETTING CLOSE TO BEING UNDER 200 POUNDS. 1623 01:14:54,172 --> 01:14:56,620 SO SHE IS IN A GOOD PLACE RIGHT NOW 1624 01:14:56,620 --> 01:14:59,137 AND VERY CLOSE TO THE FINISH LINE, 1625 01:14:59,137 --> 01:15:02,068 AND WE'LL HAVE TO MAKE SURE SHE GET THERE. 1626 01:15:02,068 --> 01:15:09,344 ♪♪ 1627 01:15:09,344 --> 01:15:16,620 ♪♪ 1628 01:15:16,620 --> 01:15:20,586 Nicole: TODAY, WE'RE HAVING SOME FAMILY OVER FOR A BARBECUE. 1629 01:15:20,586 --> 01:15:25,000 THINGS HAVE BEEN GETTING BETTER OVER THE LAST COUPLE OF MONTHS 1630 01:15:25,000 --> 01:15:27,448 BECAUSE I'VE BEEN WORKING THROUGH SOME OF MY EMOTIONS 1631 01:15:27,448 --> 01:15:30,482 AND LEARNING TO COPE WITHOUT USING FOOD. 1632 01:15:30,482 --> 01:15:32,344 I HAVEN'T REALLY FOUND MY HAPPY PLACE 1633 01:15:32,344 --> 01:15:34,620 LIKE THE THERAPIST TOLD ME TO, 1634 01:15:34,620 --> 01:15:37,655 BUT I'VE BEEN MAKING PROGRESS, 1635 01:15:37,655 --> 01:15:39,275 AND I'M NOT BLAMING ANYONE ELSE 1636 01:15:39,275 --> 01:15:42,758 IF THERE'S A FOOD I CAN'T HAVE AROUND ME. 1637 01:15:42,758 --> 01:15:44,862 TEMPTATION FOODS ARE, LIKE, ALL AROUND ME... 1638 01:15:44,862 --> 01:15:47,310 -YES. -...AND IT'S HARD FOR ME. 1639 01:15:47,310 --> 01:15:50,482 Nicole: SO NO MATTER WHAT EVERYONE ELSE IS EATING, 1640 01:15:50,482 --> 01:15:53,689 I'M STICKING TO PROTEIN AND 1,200 CALORIES 1641 01:15:53,689 --> 01:15:55,758 AND SKIPPING THE CARBS. 1642 01:15:55,758 --> 01:15:57,344 IT'S NOT EASY YET, 1643 01:15:57,344 --> 01:16:00,793 BUT AT LEAST I'M HEADING INTO A BETTER DIRECTION NOW, 1644 01:16:00,793 --> 01:16:02,827 AND I HAVE SOME TOOLS TO HELP ME DEAL 1645 01:16:02,827 --> 01:16:06,551 WITH THINGS I DIDN'T EVEN REALIZE I HAD TO DEAL WITH. 1646 01:16:06,551 --> 01:16:09,827 SO I FEEL CONFIDENT ABOUT WHERE I'M HEADED NOW. 1647 01:16:09,827 --> 01:16:13,241 -I'M SO, SO PROUD OF YOU. -YEAH? 1648 01:16:13,241 --> 01:16:15,103 I'VE WORKED REALLY HARD TO GET WHERE I AM. 1649 01:16:15,103 --> 01:16:18,344 I REALLY HAVE. -I KNOW YOU HAVE. 1650 01:16:18,344 --> 01:16:22,344 Nicole: DR. NOW HAS AGREED TO SEE ME AGAIN HERE IN A MONTH, 1651 01:16:22,344 --> 01:16:25,793 AND I'M HOPING THAT HE IS WILLING TO GIVE ME SKIN REMOVAL, 1652 01:16:25,793 --> 01:16:29,000 BUT I KNOW THAT ALL DEPENDS ON MY PROGRESS, 1653 01:16:29,000 --> 01:16:30,517 SO I'M WORKING REALLY HARD 1654 01:16:30,517 --> 01:16:33,413 TO LOSE AS MUCH WEIGHT AS POSSIBLE BY THEN, 1655 01:16:33,413 --> 01:16:35,275 AND I HOPE IT'S ENOUGH. 1656 01:16:35,275 --> 01:16:43,758 ♪♪ 1657 01:16:43,758 --> 01:16:52,275 ♪♪ 1658 01:16:52,275 --> 01:16:55,241 Ashley: IT'S BEEN A MONTH SINCE I'VE HAD MY SKIN SURGERY, 1659 01:16:55,241 --> 01:16:58,103 AND MY RECOVERY HAS BEEN GOING OKAY. 1660 01:16:58,103 --> 01:16:59,586 IT WAS PRETTY PAINFUL FOR A WHILE, 1661 01:16:59,586 --> 01:17:03,172 BUT MY INCISIONS ARE HEALING PRETTY WELL NOW. 1662 01:17:03,172 --> 01:17:05,413 I'VE SLOWLY BEEN ABLE TO GET BACK TO DOING CHORES 1663 01:17:05,413 --> 01:17:08,965 AROUND THE HOUSE, LIKE COOKING AND CLEANING, 1664 01:17:08,965 --> 01:17:10,275 AND I'M TRYING TO SHOW MY SON 1665 01:17:10,275 --> 01:17:12,931 THE RIGHT CHOICES TO MAKE WITH FOOD. 1666 01:17:12,931 --> 01:17:14,103 Ashley: WOULD YOU LIKE SOMETHING TO DRINK? 1667 01:17:14,103 --> 01:17:16,482 YOU WANT WATER? 1668 01:17:16,482 --> 01:17:18,586 YOU WANT ONE? OH, YOU ALREADY HAVE ONE. 1669 01:17:18,586 --> 01:17:20,551 GOT ONE AND COFFEE. 1670 01:17:20,551 --> 01:17:22,517 Ashley: SINCE JACOB'S BEEN ON THE ROAD, 1671 01:17:22,517 --> 01:17:25,000 MY MOM WAS HERE TAKING CARE OF ME 1672 01:17:25,000 --> 01:17:29,000 AND HELPING OUT WITH PATRICK AROUND THE HOUSE, 1673 01:17:29,000 --> 01:17:33,137 BUT I'M GLAD TO BE UP DOING EVERYTHING FOR MYSELF AGAIN. 1674 01:17:33,137 --> 01:17:34,379 BEING ALMOST IMMOBILE 1675 01:17:34,379 --> 01:17:36,413 AND NEEDING SOMEBODY TO TAKE CARE OF ME 1676 01:17:36,413 --> 01:17:39,241 MAKES ME FEEL LIKE I'M BACK WHERE I WAS, 1677 01:17:39,241 --> 01:17:41,896 AND I DIDN'T LIKE THAT, 1678 01:17:41,896 --> 01:17:45,000 AND I'M GLAD TO BE UP AND ACTIVE AGAIN, 1679 01:17:45,000 --> 01:17:48,068 BUT I STILL CAN'T PUSH MYSELF TOO HARD, 1680 01:17:48,068 --> 01:17:49,827 SO I HAVE TO WATCH IT. 1681 01:17:53,103 --> 01:17:55,103 IT'S REALLY CRAZY NOT TO HAVE MY STOMACH 1682 01:17:55,103 --> 01:17:57,793 HIT MY THIGHS WHEN I WALK, 1683 01:17:57,793 --> 01:18:01,068 AND IT'S ACTUALLY SOMEWHAT FLAT NOW. 1684 01:18:01,068 --> 01:18:03,586 COMPARED TO WHAT I WAS CARRYING AROUND TWO YEARS AGO, 1685 01:18:03,586 --> 01:18:07,137 IT'S A PRETTY SHOCKING CHANGE. 1686 01:18:07,137 --> 01:18:09,862 WITH THE DOCTOR REMOVING 41 POUNDS OFF OF ME, 1687 01:18:09,862 --> 01:18:13,620 I'M GETTING PRETTY CLOSE TO BEING 300 POUNDS, 1688 01:18:13,620 --> 01:18:16,896 AND BY NEXT MONTH I WANT TO GET INTO THE 200s, 1689 01:18:16,896 --> 01:18:21,448 AND I REALLY CAN'T WAIT, ESPECIALLY TO GET NEW CLOTHES. 1690 01:18:21,448 --> 01:18:23,379 SO NOW THAT I'VE BEEN GIVEN THIS CHANCE 1691 01:18:23,379 --> 01:18:25,517 AT MAKING EVEN MORE PROGRESS, 1692 01:18:25,517 --> 01:18:26,931 I JUST HAVE TO MAKE SURE 1693 01:18:26,931 --> 01:18:29,379 I DON'T LET MY EMOTIONS AND MY ANXIETY HOLD ME BACK. 1694 01:18:35,965 --> 01:18:43,724 ♪♪ 1695 01:18:43,724 --> 01:18:51,517 ♪♪ 1696 01:18:51,517 --> 01:18:55,689 Nicole: I'VE BEEN WORKING REALLY HARD THESE PAST FEW MONTHS, 1697 01:18:55,689 --> 01:18:57,586 AND I FEEL LIKE I'M STARTING TO SEE 1698 01:18:57,586 --> 01:19:00,620 A LOT OF PROGRESS ON MY BODY, 1699 01:19:00,620 --> 01:19:04,827 BUT MY SKIN IS SAGGING A LOT, SO I REALLY NEED TO GET SURGERY. 1700 01:19:07,275 --> 01:19:10,517 AND I'M GOING TO HOUSTON TOMORROW TO SEE DR. NOW AGAIN. 1701 01:19:10,517 --> 01:19:13,344 AND I'M SO NERVOUS BECAUSE I KNOW THE LAST TIME 1702 01:19:13,344 --> 01:19:15,551 HE WANTED ME TO START THERAPY, 1703 01:19:15,551 --> 01:19:18,379 AND HE WASN'T TOO HAPPY WITH ME OVERALL, 1704 01:19:18,379 --> 01:19:21,758 SO I'M JUST HOPING THIS TIME I SHOW HIM WHAT I NEED 1705 01:19:21,758 --> 01:19:25,344 TO TRY AND GET SKIN REMOVAL 1706 01:19:25,344 --> 01:19:28,862 BECAUSE I CAN'T LIVE THE REST OF MY LIFE LIKE THIS, 1707 01:19:28,862 --> 01:19:31,344 SO I REALLY HOPE TO GET IT TOMORROW. 1708 01:19:31,344 --> 01:19:38,413 ♪♪ 1709 01:19:38,413 --> 01:19:45,551 ♪♪ 1710 01:19:45,551 --> 01:19:49,275 ME AND CHARLIE ARE BACK IN HOUSTON AND AT DR. NOW'S, 1711 01:19:49,275 --> 01:19:51,862 AND I'M SOEXTREMELY NERVOUS. 1712 01:19:51,862 --> 01:19:55,620 I REALLY WANT SKIN REMOVAL, AND I'M HOPING I HIT MY GOAL 1713 01:19:55,620 --> 01:19:59,551 SO I AT LEAST HAVE A CHANCE TO GET APPROVED FOR THAT TODAY. 1714 01:19:59,551 --> 01:20:01,724 NICOLE LEWIS? 1715 01:20:01,724 --> 01:20:04,172 BUT I NEED TO BE LOSING 15 POUNDS A MONTH 1716 01:20:04,172 --> 01:20:07,310 TO BE BACK ON TRACK AND HIT MY GOAL. 1717 01:20:07,310 --> 01:20:10,517 THE LAST TIME I WAS HERE WAS FIVE MONTHS AGO, 1718 01:20:10,517 --> 01:20:14,172 SO THAT MEANS I NEED TO BE UNDER 363 TODAY. 1719 01:20:18,379 --> 01:20:20,482 THAT'S AWESOME. 1720 01:20:20,482 --> 01:20:24,344 GOOD JOB, BABY. 1721 01:20:24,344 --> 01:20:25,965 ALL RIGHT. 1722 01:20:25,965 --> 01:20:28,206 Nicole: I'M REALLY HAPPY RIGHT NOW. 1723 01:20:28,206 --> 01:20:30,172 THE LAST TIME I WEIGHED UNDER 400 POUNDS 1724 01:20:30,172 --> 01:20:33,137 WAS BACK WHEN I WAS ABOUT 15 YEARS OLD. 1725 01:20:33,137 --> 01:20:36,034 JUST TO KNOW THAT I'VE REALLY TRIED AND WORKED HARD 1726 01:20:36,034 --> 01:20:40,379 FOR EVERYTHING THAT I'VE DONE SHOWS THAT IT PAYS OFF. 1727 01:20:40,379 --> 01:20:45,310 IT MAKES ME WANT TO PUSH HARDER JUST TO HIT THAT SKIN REMOVAL, 1728 01:20:45,310 --> 01:20:47,517 AND I'M HOPING THIS IS ENOUGH. 1729 01:20:48,862 --> 01:20:49,827 [ KNOCK ON DOOR ] 1730 01:20:49,827 --> 01:20:52,068 COME IN. 1731 01:20:52,068 --> 01:20:53,482 -HELLO. -HELLO. 1732 01:20:53,482 --> 01:20:54,758 HOW Y'ALL DOING? 1733 01:20:54,758 --> 01:20:56,965 DOING GOOD. 1734 01:20:56,965 --> 01:20:58,896 ALL RIGHT. IT'S BEEN A WHILE. 1735 01:20:58,896 --> 01:21:00,241 YOU TWO DOING WELL? 1736 01:21:00,241 --> 01:21:01,620 DOING REALLY GOOD. 1737 01:21:01,620 --> 01:21:04,551 STAYING FOCUSED ON MY DIET AND EXERCISING EVERY DAY. 1738 01:21:04,551 --> 01:21:07,344 WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE BACK ON TRACK 1739 01:21:07,344 --> 01:21:10,241 BECAUSE YOU'RE DOWN TO 358 TODAY, 1740 01:21:10,241 --> 01:21:14,551 SO YOU LOST EXACTLY 80 POUNDS OVER THE LAST FIVE MONTHS. 1741 01:21:14,551 --> 01:21:16,724 THAT'S GREAT. HOW DOES THAT FEEL? 1742 01:21:16,724 --> 01:21:19,965 LOSING THAT MUCH WEIGHT IS AMAZING. 1743 01:21:19,965 --> 01:21:22,275 I JUST -- I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD BE ABLE TO DO THIS, 1744 01:21:22,275 --> 01:21:23,862 AND I'M JUST SO THANKFUL 1745 01:21:23,862 --> 01:21:26,103 THAT I HAVE BEEN ABLE TO DO THIS AND STICK WITH IT. 1746 01:21:26,103 --> 01:21:27,793 WELL, WE HAVE TO GIVE YOU CREDIT. 1747 01:21:27,793 --> 01:21:29,655 I'M PROUD OF YOU. YOU STICK WITH THE DIET, 1748 01:21:29,655 --> 01:21:32,137 AND YOU'RE MAKING GOOD PROGRESS. 1749 01:21:32,137 --> 01:21:34,862 SO YOU SEE THE IMPORTANCE OF PSYCHOTHERAPY 1750 01:21:34,862 --> 01:21:37,655 NOW THAT YOU'RE GOING TO THAT CONSISTENTLY, RIGHT? 1751 01:21:37,655 --> 01:21:39,379 I DO. IT'S REALLY HELPED ME A LOT. 1752 01:21:39,379 --> 01:21:40,517 IT'S AMAZING. 1753 01:21:40,517 --> 01:21:42,551 WELL, I'M PROUD OF YOU BECAUSE I KNOW 1754 01:21:42,551 --> 01:21:44,206 YOU'VE BEEN DEALING WITH A LOT, 1755 01:21:44,206 --> 01:21:47,793 AND IT HASN'T BEEN EASY, SO WITH YOUR PROGRESS 1756 01:21:47,793 --> 01:21:50,793 AND HOW FAR YOU HAVE COME, YOU'VE LOST A LOT OF WEIGHT, 1757 01:21:50,793 --> 01:21:52,344 AND YOU HAVE A LOT OF EXCESS SKIN, 1758 01:21:52,344 --> 01:21:53,724 SO WE'LL GO AHEAD 1759 01:21:53,724 --> 01:21:55,689 AND APPROVE YOU FOR SKIN SURGERY, OKAY? 1760 01:21:55,689 --> 01:21:58,000 OH, WOW. THAT'S AWESOME. 1761 01:21:58,000 --> 01:21:59,620 AND WE'LL SET YOU UP FOR SURGERY 1762 01:21:59,620 --> 01:22:00,931 FOR TWO MONTHS FROM NOW, 1763 01:22:00,931 --> 01:22:03,482 SO YOU CAN MAKE ARRANGEMENTS TO STAY DOWN HERE 1764 01:22:03,482 --> 01:22:06,793 FOR THREE TO FOUR WEEKS WHILE YOU RECOVER. 1765 01:22:06,793 --> 01:22:10,344 AND THAT'S NOT NEGOTIABLE IF YOU WANT TO DO THIS. 1766 01:22:10,344 --> 01:22:12,241 WOULD THAT WORK FOR YOU? 1767 01:22:12,241 --> 01:22:14,862 [ Laughing ] YEAH. 1768 01:22:14,862 --> 01:22:19,137 OKAY, AND THEN ALSO TAKE ANOTHER 20, 30 POUND OF WEIGHT, 1769 01:22:19,137 --> 01:22:22,793 SO YOU SHOULD BE UNDER 300 POUND BY THEN, OKAY? 1770 01:22:22,793 --> 01:22:24,068 -OKAY. -ALL RIGHT, NICOLE. 1771 01:22:24,068 --> 01:22:25,655 I'M PROUD OF YOUR EFFORT. -THANK YOU. 1772 01:22:25,655 --> 01:22:27,379 -YOU'VE COME A LONG WAY. -THANK YOU SO MUCH. 1773 01:22:27,379 --> 01:22:28,551 -NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN. -ALL RIGHT. 1774 01:22:28,551 --> 01:22:30,034 Nicole: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR EVERYTHING. 1775 01:22:30,034 --> 01:22:31,068 SEE YOU LATER. -OKAY. 1776 01:22:31,068 --> 01:22:33,275 -ALL RIGHT. -ALL RIGHT. 1777 01:22:36,482 --> 01:22:38,275 Dr. Nowzaradan: I'M REALLY PROUD OF NICOLE. 1778 01:22:38,275 --> 01:22:41,862 I THINK, DESPITE EVERYTHING, SHE'S DONE REALLY WELL. 1779 01:22:41,862 --> 01:22:46,827 I AM STILL CONCERNED ABOUT HER LONG-TERM SUCCESS BEING IN OHIO, 1780 01:22:46,827 --> 01:22:48,206 BUT THE BIG THING IS 1781 01:22:48,206 --> 01:22:51,103 THAT SHE'S GOING TO THERAPY THERE CONSISTENTLY, 1782 01:22:51,103 --> 01:22:53,862 AND SHE'S WORKING ON HER ISSUES, 1783 01:22:53,862 --> 01:22:56,172 AND AS LONG AS SHE KEEPS WORKING AT THAT, 1784 01:22:56,172 --> 01:22:59,241 WE WILL KEEP WORKING WITH HER TO MOVE HER AHEAD 1785 01:22:59,241 --> 01:23:01,965 SO SHE CAN TAKE THE STEPS SHE NEEDS 1786 01:23:01,965 --> 01:23:05,344 TO HIT HER TARGET. 1787 01:23:05,344 --> 01:23:08,034 Nicole: I'M SO EXCITED TO FINALLY BE APPROVED 1788 01:23:08,034 --> 01:23:10,206 FOR SKIN-REMOVAL SURGERY, 1789 01:23:10,206 --> 01:23:13,758 AND I AM PROUD OF HOW FAR I'VE COME IN THE PAST TWO YEARS, 1790 01:23:13,758 --> 01:23:16,586 AND I FEEL LIKE A HUGE WEIGHT HAS BEEN LIFTED OFF OF ME, 1791 01:23:16,586 --> 01:23:19,310 NOT JUST PHYSICALLY, BUT EMOTIONALLY, TOO, 1792 01:23:19,310 --> 01:23:21,000 AND WITH EACH DAY THAT PASSES, 1793 01:23:21,000 --> 01:23:23,586 I GET MORE AND MORE OF MY LIFE BACK. 1794 01:23:23,586 --> 01:23:26,000 I KNOW I STILL HAVE A LOT OF HARD WORK AHEAD OF ME, 1795 01:23:26,000 --> 01:23:29,965 BUT I'M HAPPY WITH WHERE I'M AT AND WITH WHERE MY LIFE IS GOING. 1796 01:23:29,965 --> 01:23:31,827 I'VE MISSED OUT ON SO MUCH LIFE, 1797 01:23:31,827 --> 01:23:34,034 SO I HAVE A LOT OF CATCHING UP TO DO, 1798 01:23:34,034 --> 01:23:37,034 AND AS SOON AS I GET MY SKIN SURGERIES OUT OF THE WAY 1799 01:23:37,034 --> 01:23:38,586 AND GET TO MY TARGET, 1800 01:23:38,586 --> 01:23:41,034 NOTHING'S GONNA TO HOLD ME BACK FROM GETTING OUT THERE 1801 01:23:41,034 --> 01:23:43,793 AND REALLY LIVING LIFE, 1802 01:23:43,793 --> 01:23:45,482 AND I JUST CAN'T WAIT. 1803 01:23:45,482 --> 01:23:51,758 ♪♪ 1804 01:23:51,758 --> 01:23:58,068 ♪♪ 1805 01:23:58,068 --> 01:24:01,241 Ashley: TODAY I'M GOING SHOPPING FOR SOME NEW CLOTHES. 1806 01:24:01,241 --> 01:24:05,724 I'M FULLY RECOVERED AND CAN DO EVERYTHING I NEED AGAIN. 1807 01:24:05,724 --> 01:24:07,448 THREE YEARS AGO I WAS JUST SITTING AROUND 1808 01:24:07,448 --> 01:24:11,000 EATING MYSELF TO DEATH, AND NOW I HAVE MY LIFE BACK, 1809 01:24:11,000 --> 01:24:14,758 AND I'M FOCUSING ON ME AND WHAT I WANT OUT OF LIFE. 1810 01:24:14,758 --> 01:24:17,172 SO THE FIRST THING I DID WAS GO FOR A WORKOUT 1811 01:24:17,172 --> 01:24:19,275 BECAUSE I MISSED DOING THAT, 1812 01:24:19,275 --> 01:24:21,862 AND NOW I'M GOING TO GET NEW CLOTHES, 1813 01:24:21,862 --> 01:24:25,241 SO I'M REALLY EXCITED ABOUT TODAY. 1814 01:24:25,241 --> 01:24:29,793 I FEEL NORMAL AND CAN SHOP AT NORMAL STORES AGAIN. 1815 01:24:29,793 --> 01:24:31,103 AND I'M REALLY EXCITED 1816 01:24:31,103 --> 01:24:33,758 ABOUT SHOWING JACOB AND PATRICK HOW I LOOK NOW 1817 01:24:33,758 --> 01:24:35,517 BECAUSE IT'S BEEN OVER 10 YEARS 1818 01:24:35,517 --> 01:24:37,034 SINCE THEY'VE SEEN ME IN ANYTHING 1819 01:24:37,034 --> 01:24:39,965 OTHER THAN MY BAGGY DRESSES. 1820 01:24:39,965 --> 01:24:43,310 TONIGHT JACOB AND I ARE GOING OUT ON A DATE. 1821 01:24:43,310 --> 01:24:46,206 I TOLD HIM I WANTED TO CELEBRATE WHEN I GOT IN THE 200s, 1822 01:24:46,206 --> 01:24:50,620 AND I AM, EVEN IF IT'S JUST BARELY. 1823 01:24:50,620 --> 01:24:55,137 SO HE SAID HE'D TAKE ME TO HAVE A LITTLE FUN. 1824 01:24:55,137 --> 01:24:58,310 I'M REALLY HAPPY WITH ALL MY PROGRESS AND HOW FAR I'VE COME. 1825 01:24:58,310 --> 01:25:01,517 THE FIRST TWO YEARS WENT SLOWER THAN I WAS EXPECTING, 1826 01:25:01,517 --> 01:25:04,724 AND THERE WERE SO MANY SETBACKS, 1827 01:25:04,724 --> 01:25:08,241 BUT I FEEL LIKE I'VE MADE UP FOR LOST TIME, 1828 01:25:08,241 --> 01:25:10,586 AND I FEEL LIKE I'M MORE IN CONTROL THAN I'VE EVER BEEN. 1829 01:25:10,586 --> 01:25:13,103 [ LAUGHS ] -WANT ANOTHER ONE? 1830 01:25:13,103 --> 01:25:15,275 Ashley: BUT I'M STILL MAKING MYSELF A PRIORITY, 1831 01:25:15,275 --> 01:25:18,379 AND I'M DISCOVERING A LOT ABOUT MYSELF, 1832 01:25:18,379 --> 01:25:20,310 AND I'M CONFIDENT THIS NEXT YEAR 1833 01:25:20,310 --> 01:25:23,793 IS NOT ONLY GONNA BE MY BEST YEAR IN TERMS OF PROGRESS, 1834 01:25:23,793 --> 01:25:26,896 BUT THE BEST YEAR I'VE HAD IN A LONG TIME. 1835 01:25:26,896 --> 01:25:29,310 -THERE YOU GO. -AT LEAST I WON ONE. 1836 01:25:29,310 --> 01:25:31,655 Ashley: I'M NO LONGER LIVING IN FEAR OR GUILT, 1837 01:25:31,655 --> 01:25:32,103 AND I'M NOT LOOKING BACK BECAUSE I KNOW I CAN DO IT.