"It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia" Mac and Dennis Become EMTs

1 00:00:04,973 --> 00:00:08,841 <i>Don't think</i> this guy's gonna make it. You hear me? 2 00:00:08,843 --> 00:00:10,977 <i>Did you have an OPA.</i> 3 00:00:10,979 --> 00:00:12,745 <i>Breathing's irregular and weak.</i> 4 00:00:12,747 --> 00:00:13,880 Responsive to pain? - Not at all. 5 00:00:13,882 --> 00:00:15,280 Sir, can you hear me? His lips are super red. 6 00:00:15,282 --> 00:00:17,683 Purple cyanosis. 7 00:00:17,685 --> 00:00:19,150 - Super diaphoretic. - Sweating like a pig. 8 00:00:19,152 --> 00:00:20,887 -What happened to this guy? -We don't know this guy from Adam. 9 00:00:20,889 --> 00:00:22,622 We've never seen him before at all. He's a total outsider. 10 00:00:22,624 --> 00:00:25,691 I never saw him before in the bar at all. 11 00:00:25,693 --> 00:00:27,693 His goddamn heart just stopped for no reason. 12 00:00:27,695 --> 00:00:30,730 Not no reason. You gave him a hot pepper. 13 00:00:30,732 --> 00:00:33,265 Don't... They don't have to know that. 14 00:00:33,267 --> 00:00:34,634 -Never mind that! -It was a totally unrelated incident. 15 00:00:34,636 --> 00:00:36,802 -Never mind that. -Who was that guy anyway? 16 00:00:36,804 --> 00:00:38,303 Man, just like some random dude who walked in here off the streets. 17 00:00:38,305 --> 00:00:40,673 - Yeah. - Well, we are an open bar. 18 00:00:40,675 --> 00:00:42,875 I thought he was, like, a jazzman. 19 00:00:42,877 --> 00:00:44,476 I mean, he had a ponytail. He had a piano-key tie. 20 00:00:44,478 --> 00:00:48,548 So I pranked him with a ghost pepper. 21 00:00:48,550 --> 00:00:50,282 You'd think that a jazzman would be more accustomed to spices, you know? 22 00:00:50,284 --> 00:00:52,852 -Right? You'd think he'd be fine. -Yeah, he just dropped... 23 00:00:52,854 --> 00:00:54,085 -Here you go, Frank. One smash burger. -Oh. 24 00:00:54,087 --> 00:00:56,022 It's about time. 25 00:00:56,024 --> 00:00:57,723 Okay. 26 00:00:57,725 --> 00:00:58,991 Ooh. Somebody dying or something? 27 00:00:58,993 --> 00:01:01,627 Random jazzman. 28 00:01:01,629 --> 00:01:02,562 Really? Just wandered right in off the streets? No reason? 29 00:01:02,564 --> 00:01:06,464 We are an open, working bar. 30 00:01:06,466 --> 00:01:09,134 Sorry. Wh-What's with the food delivery here? 31 00:01:09,136 --> 00:01:10,970 Oh. I'm, uh, doing a Postmates thing as a side gig. 32 00:01:10,972 --> 00:01:14,205 - On a bike? - Uh. No, no. 33 00:01:14,207 --> 00:01:16,207 Yeah, no, sorry, uh. I-I mean, why are you ordering food from Dee, Frank? 34 00:01:16,209 --> 00:01:19,612 You don't like the burgers that I've been making in the apartment? 35 00:01:19,614 --> 00:01:23,081 What? I wanted a smash burger. 36 00:01:23,083 --> 00:01:24,550 You don't think I can make a burger and smash it? I'll smash a burger for you. 37 00:01:24,552 --> 00:01:27,620 What the hell, Frank? A 5% tip? 38 00:01:27,622 --> 00:01:29,589 Pedal faster. It's cold as shit. 39 00:01:29,591 --> 00:01:31,258 Goddamn it. 40 00:01:32,694 --> 00:01:33,559 They're taking him to the hospital. 41 00:01:33,561 --> 00:01:35,427 Good job, guys! Good luck! 42 00:01:35,429 --> 00:01:36,629 Yes, uh, great work, fellas. Uh, thank you for your service. 43 00:01:36,631 --> 00:01:39,197 That guy's gonna sue the shit out of me. 44 00:01:39,199 --> 00:01:40,933 That's not good, man. 45 00:01:40,935 --> 00:01:41,634 Hey, did anybody else get, like, a crazy rush from that experience? 46 00:01:41,636 --> 00:01:45,771 I did. 47 00:01:45,773 --> 00:01:47,640 It's nice to have a little action around here, right? 48 00:01:47,642 --> 00:01:48,874 The way those EMTs, like, fire in and they fire out with all the lights 49 00:01:48,876 --> 00:01:52,945 -and the sirens, saving lives. -It's awesome. 50 00:01:52,947 --> 00:01:54,547 You know, it's as close to playing God as you can get, you know? 51 00:01:54,549 --> 00:01:57,016 And the lifestyle. There's an appeal to it for sure. 52 00:01:57,018 --> 00:01:58,918 The lifestyle. Yeah, the whole thing is a vibe, and I am here for it. 53 00:01:58,920 --> 00:02:02,955 - Me too. It's sexy. - Yeah, sexy. 54 00:02:02,957 --> 00:02:05,223 You know that they bang the doctors and the nurses, right? 55 00:02:05,225 --> 00:02:07,192 Of course they do. Of course they do. Are you kidding me? 56 00:02:07,194 --> 00:02:09,427 The lifestyle is spicier than one of Frank's ghost peppers. 57 00:02:09,429 --> 00:02:12,798 Mac, come here for a second. 58 00:02:12,800 --> 00:02:12,800 Go with me here, but, uh, I'm sensing an opportunity, 59 00:02:14,802 --> 00:02:16,470 and I'm gonna float something by you that I think is a 60 00:02:17,639 --> 00:02:20,706 very reasonable proposition. 61 00:02:20,708 --> 00:02:23,174 Hmm. 62 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:31,074 Do you want subtitles for any video? -=[ ai.OpenSubtitles.com ]=- 63 00:02:45,432 --> 00:02:48,768 Oh, shit, pal. 64 00:02:48,770 --> 00:02:49,937 Oh. 65 00:02:51,039 --> 00:02:51,739 Uh... 66 00:02:52,874 --> 00:02:53,407 You're not cake, are you? 67 00:02:55,375 --> 00:02:55,677 Nah. It's just a joke between me and the guys... 68 00:02:56,944 --> 00:03:00,546 Uh... Something. 69 00:03:00,548 --> 00:03:02,915 Anyway, I came over here to say I'm sorry because... 70 00:03:02,917 --> 00:03:06,484 Well, y-you know, actually, it's not my fault. 71 00:03:06,486 --> 00:03:08,754 Well, sure, I gave you a hot pepper and you had a heart attack, 72 00:03:08,756 --> 00:03:11,590 but, you know, I-I kind of attribute that to the... 73 00:03:11,592 --> 00:03:12,827 you know, the jazzman lifestyle more than the pepper. 74 00:03:16,531 --> 00:03:17,431 Eh? Just checking about the cake thing. 75 00:03:20,267 --> 00:03:22,034 You never know with those guys. 76 00:03:22,036 --> 00:03:23,905 Well, well, well. 77 00:03:25,907 --> 00:03:27,840 The Lawyer. What's with the getup? 78 00:03:27,842 --> 00:03:31,242 It's not a getup. 79 00:03:31,244 --> 00:03:31,979 It's an eye patch from when I was attacked by a bird. 80 00:03:33,748 --> 00:03:36,982 Gruesome. I wish I'd have seen that. 81 00:03:36,984 --> 00:03:39,417 You did see it. 82 00:03:39,419 --> 00:03:40,353 I don't remember. 83 00:03:42,456 --> 00:03:43,756 You don't remember being present in a court of law 84 00:03:43,758 --> 00:03:45,927 while a wild animal pecked out someone's eye? 85 00:03:47,695 --> 00:03:49,897 Can you be more specific? 86 00:03:50,932 --> 00:03:52,765 Oh. 87 00:03:52,767 --> 00:03:54,533 I'll be more specific, Frank. 88 00:03:54,535 --> 00:03:55,002 I'm here looking for clients, and I just found one. 89 00:03:57,071 --> 00:04:00,740 You just admitted to causing this man grievous harm, 90 00:04:00,742 --> 00:04:03,776 and I am going to take you down. 91 00:04:03,778 --> 00:04:06,979 -I'm innocent. -You literally just admitted it. 92 00:04:06,981 --> 00:04:09,148 -I was lying. -To a man in a coma? 93 00:04:09,150 --> 00:04:10,952 -I thought he was cake. -Okay. 94 00:04:12,220 --> 00:04:13,020 I'll see you in court, Frank. 95 00:04:14,021 --> 00:04:15,322 Shit. 96 00:04:17,925 --> 00:04:17,959 This is great, buddy. Frankly, I think we should've done it years ago. 97 00:04:20,427 --> 00:04:23,361 Agreed. This is the perfect complement 98 00:04:23,363 --> 00:04:25,898 -to our fast-paced lifestyle. -I think so too. 99 00:04:25,900 --> 00:04:26,464 Plus, I really feel like we should know how to do CPR, you know? 100 00:04:26,466 --> 00:04:29,502 Yes. Yes. 101 00:04:29,504 --> 00:04:31,203 Hey. Uh, pepper? 102 00:04:31,205 --> 00:04:35,040 And what do we have here? 103 00:04:35,042 --> 00:04:36,008 Well, the incident with the jazzman got me thinking about peppers, 104 00:04:36,010 --> 00:04:38,443 getting peppers back into my life. 105 00:04:38,445 --> 00:04:39,912 You know? Peppers spice everything up 106 00:04:39,914 --> 00:04:41,312 from... from tacos to talk shows. 107 00:04:41,314 --> 00:04:43,783 That's cute. 108 00:04:43,785 --> 00:04:45,151 -Yeah. -Yeah. Okay. I like where your head's at, 109 00:04:45,153 --> 00:04:46,719 but I think really it's maybe a matter of dosage. 110 00:04:46,721 --> 00:04:49,989 Like we-we shouldn't eat a whole pepper. 111 00:04:49,991 --> 00:04:51,891 We saw what happened to the jazzman. 112 00:04:51,893 --> 00:04:52,892 I'm thinking maybe microdosing is the way to go. 113 00:04:52,894 --> 00:04:55,628 -Microdose. Explain. -Yep. 114 00:04:55,630 --> 00:04:57,096 Well, instead of taking 100% of the dose 10% of the time, 115 00:04:57,098 --> 00:05:00,966 we take 10% of the dose 100% of the time. 116 00:05:00,968 --> 00:05:04,469 That is scientifically more better. 117 00:05:04,471 --> 00:05:06,371 -Wanna try it? -Yeah. 118 00:05:06,373 --> 00:05:07,438 All right, just take a little nibble. 119 00:05:07,440 --> 00:05:07,875 Just a little... a little micro, huh? 120 00:05:08,776 --> 00:05:09,376 Yeah. 121 00:05:12,547 --> 00:05:14,246 Mm-hmm. And then we just need to repeat 122 00:05:14,248 --> 00:05:15,714 -that dosage all day and all night. -Absolutely. That's good. 123 00:05:15,716 --> 00:05:18,250 I'm getting a little heat, but it's not too much heat. 124 00:05:18,252 --> 00:05:20,619 No. I definitely don't need more than that, know what I mean? 125 00:05:20,621 --> 00:05:22,320 -No. I'm gonna need more in 15 minutes. -Well, sure. 126 00:05:22,322 --> 00:05:25,390 Okay. 127 00:05:25,392 --> 00:05:26,692 - Speaking of spicy... - How's everyone doing? 128 00:05:26,694 --> 00:05:28,426 ...things just got a little <i>caliente</i> . 129 00:05:28,428 --> 00:05:30,629 Hello, class, and welcome. 130 00:05:30,631 --> 00:05:32,330 I wanna congratulate you all for making a decision 131 00:05:32,332 --> 00:05:34,500 to pursue a career in this field. 132 00:05:37,404 --> 00:05:37,872 Are you two guys all right? 133 00:05:40,775 --> 00:05:41,341 -Yeah. -Uh, yeah. 134 00:05:43,744 --> 00:05:43,878 Yeah, all good. All good. Uh, and may I, uh, compliment you on your uniform? 135 00:05:45,478 --> 00:05:48,814 The snugness, uh, really accentuates your physique. 136 00:05:48,816 --> 00:05:52,585 If-If that's okay to say. 137 00:05:52,587 --> 00:05:54,620 Uh... It's not, but let's continue, huh? 138 00:05:54,622 --> 00:05:57,256 Uh, if you don't mind, can we skip to the fun parts? 139 00:05:57,258 --> 00:05:59,490 - You're not even letting me get started. 140 00:05:59,492 --> 00:06:00,427 Sorry. My, uh, my partner here, he's just excited to save lives. 141 00:06:01,729 --> 00:06:05,965 Okay. Well, I applaud you for your enthusiasm, 142 00:06:05,967 --> 00:06:07,533 - but let's stay on track here, huh? Now... 143 00:06:07,535 --> 00:06:09,136 - Um... - Yes? 144 00:06:11,639 --> 00:06:13,072 When I just referred to the gentleman to my right as my partner, 145 00:06:13,074 --> 00:06:15,875 I meant in medicine, not in life. 146 00:06:15,877 --> 00:06:19,245 In life, I am very much single. 147 00:06:19,247 --> 00:06:22,248 That's great, but I wanna start this class right now, okay? 148 00:06:22,250 --> 00:06:24,950 Oh, God. I-I tell you, man, I think I got the dosage off. 149 00:06:24,952 --> 00:06:28,120 I think I ate a little bit too much. 150 00:06:28,122 --> 00:06:29,487 Less is more. That's on me. 151 00:06:29,489 --> 00:06:32,057 -The what? -The hot peppers. 152 00:06:32,059 --> 00:06:33,491 Uh, when do we cover the dosing, the pepper dosing in the class? 153 00:06:33,493 --> 00:06:36,528 I don't know what you're even talking about, 154 00:06:36,530 --> 00:06:38,463 but I tell you what, let's talk about CPR. 155 00:06:38,465 --> 00:06:41,166 - Oh, I'd like to volunteer. - No, I don't... 156 00:06:41,168 --> 00:06:44,570 -You're already getting up. All right. -I'm so sorry. 157 00:06:44,572 --> 00:06:46,538 It's so much spicier than I thought. 158 00:06:46,540 --> 00:06:48,507 Now, when we get to the chest compressions, 159 00:06:48,509 --> 00:06:49,608 should I take your shirt off or should you take mine off? 160 00:06:49,610 --> 00:06:53,112 No shirts come off. 161 00:06:53,114 --> 00:06:54,479 Actually, I'd love to take my shirt off. I'm getting pretty sweaty. 162 00:06:54,481 --> 00:06:56,682 -Can we start with the dummies, please? Right here. -Okay. 163 00:06:56,684 --> 00:06:57,184 And hands go like so, and we want to start with compressions to the song, 164 00:06:59,120 --> 00:07:03,255 ♪ <i>Ha, ha, ha, ha</i> <i>Staying alive</i> ♪ 165 00:07:03,257 --> 00:07:05,858 -Let me give it a shot. Do you mind? -You wanna step in? 166 00:07:05,860 --> 00:07:06,792 Actually, I'd love to step in here and see this thing. 167 00:07:06,794 --> 00:07:09,460 -Sure. -Yeah. 168 00:07:09,462 --> 00:07:09,931 -How's this? -Ah. 169 00:07:12,233 --> 00:07:14,566 That's-That's-That's a little too fast. 170 00:07:14,568 --> 00:07:15,036 And you see, class, I'm increasing the rate of compressions 171 00:07:16,270 --> 00:07:19,238 to ensure maximum blood flow. 172 00:07:19,240 --> 00:07:20,906 - Class, don't listen to him. - It's so hot! 173 00:07:20,908 --> 00:07:22,508 Now, class, you'll notice I am still finding a rhythm. 174 00:07:22,510 --> 00:07:25,244 That is way too fast. 175 00:07:25,246 --> 00:07:26,278 Well, somebody doesn't understand double time. 176 00:07:26,280 --> 00:07:29,114 You see, I'm pushing to a much spicier song. 177 00:07:29,116 --> 00:07:29,750 Is everyone familiar with the Gipsy Kings's "Bamboléo"? 178 00:07:31,419 --> 00:07:35,554 Ah! An excellent choice, very spicy. 179 00:07:35,556 --> 00:07:37,356 Speaking of spice, I brought plenty of peppers for everyone. 180 00:07:43,864 --> 00:07:43,931 Gosh, that damn lawyer is gonna jam me the hell up. 181 00:07:47,435 --> 00:07:51,170 - Yeah. - Hang on. 182 00:07:51,172 --> 00:07:52,338 Maybe I should slip him a ghost pepper. 183 00:07:52,340 --> 00:07:54,039 Yeah, well, that's a good idea. 184 00:07:54,041 --> 00:07:55,207 All right, uh, chili flakes, please. 185 00:07:55,209 --> 00:07:57,475 Wait. What? 186 00:07:57,477 --> 00:07:58,944 I-I need the chili flakes, please. See them? 187 00:07:58,946 --> 00:08:00,045 -Yeah, I see 'em. -"Yes, Chef." 188 00:08:00,047 --> 00:08:01,113 -What? -Say, "Yes, Chef." 189 00:08:01,115 --> 00:08:04,016 Why? 190 00:08:04,018 --> 00:08:04,750 Because the stakes are, uh, very high, you know, this is high-stakes stuff. 191 00:08:04,752 --> 00:08:08,387 Stakes of what? 192 00:08:08,389 --> 00:08:10,255 The cooking! It's-It's life-and-death stuff, man. 193 00:08:10,257 --> 00:08:12,191 -I need you to say, "Yes, chef." -You know what you should do? 194 00:08:12,193 --> 00:08:14,126 You should cook up an extra spicy meal. Really, really spicy. 195 00:08:14,128 --> 00:08:17,563 And I'll give it to The Lawyer. I'll trick him into eating it. 196 00:08:17,565 --> 00:08:20,498 And then if he's not admitted to the hospital, 197 00:08:20,500 --> 00:08:22,334 it would prove that I'm innocent. 198 00:08:22,336 --> 00:08:23,736 Okay, what if he dies? 199 00:08:23,738 --> 00:08:25,070 Win-win either way, right? 200 00:08:25,072 --> 00:08:26,538 - All right. - Oh! 201 00:08:26,540 --> 00:08:28,540 - Try that, baby! - Good smash. 202 00:08:28,542 --> 00:08:30,476 -Smashed it good! -Really? 203 00:08:30,478 --> 00:08:31,910 You know how to do that? 204 00:08:31,912 --> 00:08:33,379 Yeah, it's a brick-based medium. 205 00:08:33,381 --> 00:08:34,747 -Look at that. -Yeah, that's my favorite part. 206 00:08:34,749 --> 00:08:36,281 What do you think? Same as a smash burger, right? 207 00:08:36,283 --> 00:08:36,951 -It's great! -Well, I added a little extra spice. 208 00:08:39,453 --> 00:08:41,487 -Oh, yeah. I can feel it. -I've been microdosing myself. 209 00:08:41,489 --> 00:08:43,455 -Hey, yo. Here we go, Frank. -Yeah, it goes right up. 210 00:08:43,457 --> 00:08:46,191 Your smash burger. 211 00:08:46,193 --> 00:08:47,393 -No, you're too late. -Yeah. Oh, sorry about that. 212 00:08:47,395 --> 00:08:49,061 That's because I got smashed by a Prius. 213 00:08:49,063 --> 00:08:51,497 - Ooh. Yeah. - Whoops! Yeah. 214 00:08:51,499 --> 00:08:52,765 -I need some shin guards, I think. -Yeah, looks bad. 215 00:08:52,767 --> 00:08:54,501 Yeah, it doesn't feel as bad. 216 00:08:54,503 --> 00:08:55,868 Well, Charlie already made me one, so you get no tip. 217 00:08:55,870 --> 00:08:58,037 -Charlie made you that? -Oh, yeah, yeah. 218 00:08:58,039 --> 00:08:59,605 It's basically the same exact thing as that smash burger. 219 00:08:59,607 --> 00:09:02,207 -Really good. -Ho-Hold on a second. 220 00:09:02,209 --> 00:09:03,542 -What else can you make? -I can make anything. You kidding me? 221 00:09:03,544 --> 00:09:05,244 Okay. Well, hold on. I'm-I'm getting an idea here. 222 00:09:05,246 --> 00:09:08,313 -Yeah? -Yeah. 223 00:09:08,315 --> 00:09:09,581 What if you help me spice up my job a little bit, right? 224 00:09:09,583 --> 00:09:12,317 And we make this sort of a ghost kitchen situation. 225 00:09:12,319 --> 00:09:14,553 We do it right here. I keep my work central, 226 00:09:14,555 --> 00:09:17,289 but I really get to crank out the orders a lot faster. 227 00:09:17,291 --> 00:09:19,725 Okay, I like it. I'll do this for you, Dee. 228 00:09:19,727 --> 00:09:21,226 I will, but you gotta promise me something. 229 00:09:21,228 --> 00:09:22,828 You gotta say, "Yes, chef," "No, chef," 230 00:09:22,830 --> 00:09:24,596 "On your left, chef," "Corner, chef." 231 00:09:24,598 --> 00:09:26,432 These kind of things. It's gotta work that way, Dee. 232 00:09:26,434 --> 00:09:27,699 -It's gotta work that way. -Why would I say any of those things? 233 00:09:27,701 --> 00:09:29,570 'Cause we're cooking food. 234 00:09:31,072 --> 00:09:32,271 -Yep, just food. -It's good. 235 00:09:32,273 --> 00:09:34,106 Doesn't seem like that big of a deal. 236 00:09:34,108 --> 00:09:35,209 It's the most serious thing... 237 00:09:36,777 --> 00:09:37,745 -that has ever-- -Yes, chef. 238 00:09:39,713 --> 00:09:40,347 -Yes, chef. -Yeah? 239 00:09:41,949 --> 00:09:43,382 -Don't care. Yep. -Isn't that great? 240 00:09:43,384 --> 00:09:44,750 Wait, wait, wait. Dee, before you go, 241 00:09:44,752 --> 00:09:45,152 wanna spice up your bike ride with a habanero? 242 00:09:48,289 --> 00:09:50,956 - Coming through. Coming through! 243 00:09:50,958 --> 00:09:53,859 On your left, bitch. 244 00:09:57,031 --> 00:09:57,830 Yo! Look out. Look out. Look out. Look out, bitch! 245 00:09:57,832 --> 00:09:59,798 Move it, boner. 246 00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:00,367 Goddamn. Ooh! 247 00:10:06,107 --> 00:10:07,773 Buddy, getting a refund on those classes 248 00:10:07,775 --> 00:10:10,642 and spending it on a decommissioned ambulance was the way to go. 249 00:10:10,644 --> 00:10:13,245 The illegality of what we're doing is spicy enough to get me off. 250 00:10:13,247 --> 00:10:16,448 And speaking of spice, I think we should up the dose. 251 00:10:16,450 --> 00:10:19,351 I think we should cool it on the peppers for a little bit. 252 00:10:19,353 --> 00:10:21,186 I mean, you take too much of those things and you can go temporarily blind. 253 00:10:21,188 --> 00:10:24,857 -Blind? That's crazy. No, you can't. -Y-Yes, you can. 254 00:10:24,859 --> 00:10:27,594 <i>Zebra 3? Zebra 3?</i> <i>You anywhere near 2nd and Race?</i> 255 00:10:27,596 --> 00:10:30,095 <i>Got a woman</i> <i>with an injury on the sidewalk.</i> 256 00:10:30,097 --> 00:10:31,964 Second and Race? That's like a block away. 257 00:10:31,966 --> 00:10:33,732 -Yeah. -Maybe we should answer it. 258 00:10:33,734 --> 00:10:34,401 -Well, here's one issue. -What? 259 00:10:35,936 --> 00:10:38,937 -We are not EMTs. -Right. 260 00:10:38,939 --> 00:10:41,240 <i>This is Zebra 3.</i> We are 20 out. Go to closer unit. 261 00:10:41,242 --> 00:10:42,409 <i>It's only</i> a turned knee 262 00:10:44,613 --> 00:10:45,878 <i>and a run to St. Mercy's.</i> I'm sure she can wait. 263 00:10:45,880 --> 00:10:46,080 This is Flaming Pepper, new truck on the rotation. 264 00:10:47,516 --> 00:10:49,516 We're only about a block away. We're gonna stop by. 265 00:10:49,518 --> 00:10:50,784 <i>Roger that,</i> <i>Flaming Pepper.</i> 266 00:10:52,521 --> 00:10:53,620 <i>I'll let her know</i> you're on the way. 267 00:10:53,622 --> 00:10:55,588 What are you doing? 268 00:10:55,590 --> 00:10:56,855 I don't know. I mean, look, what could be spicier than answering a call? 269 00:10:56,857 --> 00:10:59,758 Plus, it's only a hospital run. No big deal. 270 00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:01,093 I am intrigued that it's a woman. 271 00:11:01,095 --> 00:11:02,728 Pop a pepper and let's go? 272 00:11:02,730 --> 00:11:04,963 You know what? Let's do it. 273 00:11:04,965 --> 00:11:06,331 But let's-let's cool it on the peppers, all right? Let's be professional. 274 00:11:06,333 --> 00:11:08,133 We'll-We'll take some peppers afterwards. 275 00:11:08,135 --> 00:11:09,636 Professional. You got it. 276 00:11:16,377 --> 00:11:17,044 That's probably enough of the... 277 00:11:20,114 --> 00:11:20,381 -It's doing it on its own. -Yeah. Yeah. 278 00:11:31,492 --> 00:11:32,457 - Ma'am? - How we doing over here, ma'am? 279 00:11:32,459 --> 00:11:34,393 What seems to be the problem? 280 00:11:34,395 --> 00:11:35,360 This crazy woman jumps the curb on her bicycle 281 00:11:35,362 --> 00:11:38,764 yelling nonsense about hot peppers. 282 00:11:38,766 --> 00:11:41,066 I think I twisted my knee. It might be sprained. 283 00:11:41,068 --> 00:11:43,969 - Ugh. It's terrible. - Yeah. 284 00:11:43,971 --> 00:11:44,905 Uh, ma'am, would you, uh, excuse us for one quick second? 285 00:11:46,774 --> 00:11:49,274 -Come talk to me over here. -Yeah. 286 00:11:49,276 --> 00:11:50,077 -Did you pepper up? -No. 287 00:11:51,445 --> 00:11:53,712 -Yes, you did. -No. 288 00:11:53,714 --> 00:11:54,048 - Okay, I just had a little bit o-- - Goddamn it. 289 00:11:55,449 --> 00:11:57,416 Now you're not microdosing anymore. 290 00:11:57,418 --> 00:11:59,117 You've slipped into macrodosing. 291 00:11:59,119 --> 00:12:00,419 -Macrodosing. -Yeah. 292 00:12:00,421 --> 00:12:01,787 That's cool 'cause it's my name. 293 00:12:01,789 --> 00:12:03,656 All right. Damn it. You know what? 294 00:12:03,658 --> 00:12:04,491 Give me a little bit. 'Cause I feel like I'm dipping a little. 295 00:12:06,026 --> 00:12:09,629 Just a little, dude. 296 00:12:09,631 --> 00:12:10,896 I'm not going to macrodose or anything. But, you know, a little something. 297 00:12:10,898 --> 00:12:12,798 -Yeah. -Oh, God. Man, that is the stuff. 298 00:12:12,800 --> 00:12:15,300 But it's a mild heat, right? 299 00:12:15,302 --> 00:12:16,569 -Holy shit. All right. Okay. -Oh, yeah. It's good. 300 00:12:16,571 --> 00:12:19,905 Let's save this bitch. 301 00:12:19,907 --> 00:12:21,740 Uh, ma'am. I think what you've got there is a sprain. 302 00:12:21,742 --> 00:12:23,610 Uh, you're gonna... ...not wanna put anything hot on it. 303 00:12:23,612 --> 00:12:25,444 - Or cold. - Yeah. Uh, nothing hot, nothing cold. 304 00:12:25,446 --> 00:12:28,847 Yeah. Lukewarm, really. 305 00:12:28,849 --> 00:12:29,948 Ma'am, you're gonna... you're gonna wanna keep that knee lukewarm. 306 00:12:29,950 --> 00:12:31,116 You're gonna wanna take short, shallow breaths. 307 00:12:34,522 --> 00:12:36,154 Oh, you know what? I gotta check her for a concussion 308 00:12:36,156 --> 00:12:37,557 -because I feel like she's acting crazy. -I-I-I didn't hit my head. 309 00:12:37,559 --> 00:12:39,091 Just lay back and-- 310 00:12:39,093 --> 00:12:41,561 Oh, God. 311 00:12:41,563 --> 00:12:42,729 Oh, my eye is burning. Was there something on your thumb? 312 00:12:42,731 --> 00:12:46,098 It's probably unrelated. 313 00:12:46,100 --> 00:12:47,332 Uh, ma'am. You're becoming a bit hysterical. 314 00:12:47,334 --> 00:12:49,234 Why don't I do some chest compressions on you. 315 00:12:49,236 --> 00:12:50,836 You wanna pop that sweater off? 316 00:12:50,838 --> 00:12:52,070 What? No, I need to rinse my eye. 317 00:12:52,072 --> 00:12:53,405 Well, the sweater needs to come off. 318 00:12:53,407 --> 00:12:54,973 -Yeah, let's make her unconscious. -Why? 319 00:12:54,975 --> 00:12:56,542 I feel like this is becoming a whole thing. 320 00:12:56,544 --> 00:12:57,876 -What? -Okay, ma'am, we're gonna get you 321 00:12:57,878 --> 00:12:58,779 to the hospital right now. 322 00:13:00,414 --> 00:13:01,015 Dude, this is incredible. I feel so alive. 323 00:13:06,820 --> 00:13:08,120 She definitely wants to bang me, dude. 324 00:13:08,122 --> 00:13:08,887 - Yeah, I think so. - Don't you think? Yeah. 325 00:13:12,594 --> 00:13:16,328 Yo. Order up. Let's go. 326 00:13:16,330 --> 00:13:17,431 Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. Let's go. 327 00:13:20,334 --> 00:13:21,802 Wow. 328 00:13:22,870 --> 00:13:24,537 Whoo. 329 00:13:24,539 --> 00:13:25,971 -Whoo! -Whoo. 330 00:13:25,973 --> 00:13:26,273 - Goddamn it. - I got it. 331 00:13:28,442 --> 00:13:29,943 -Hey. Wow, he's okay. -Hey. 332 00:13:36,551 --> 00:13:37,284 Move! 333 00:13:39,887 --> 00:13:41,621 You dumb bitch. 334 00:13:41,623 --> 00:13:42,456 Whoo. 335 00:13:43,891 --> 00:13:46,325 Yeah! All right. 336 00:13:46,327 --> 00:13:48,460 These are the Chipotle burritos. 337 00:13:48,462 --> 00:13:49,662 Chipotle burritos. Yes, chef. 338 00:13:49,664 --> 00:13:51,897 How's the spice pot? 339 00:13:51,899 --> 00:13:53,298 Spice pot is 340 00:13:53,300 --> 00:13:53,867 spicy but needs more peppers. 341 00:13:56,003 --> 00:13:57,503 Peppers coming up. More peppers. 342 00:13:57,505 --> 00:13:59,338 -Here we go. -I needed a "Yes, chef" there. 343 00:13:59,340 --> 00:14:00,807 -Yes, chef. Yes, chef. -Yes, chef. Yes, chef! 344 00:14:03,210 --> 00:14:04,144 Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Come on. Let's go. 345 00:14:06,380 --> 00:14:09,247 Go, go, go, go, go, go. 346 00:14:15,889 --> 00:14:17,389 I don't know. I don't think he's gonna make it. 347 00:14:17,391 --> 00:14:18,791 -Looks like he's gonna die. -He's going in and out, isn't he? 348 00:14:18,793 --> 00:14:20,560 -Should we pepper? -You want some pepper, sir? 349 00:14:20,562 --> 00:14:21,563 Goddamn it. Hands! I need hands! 350 00:14:23,765 --> 00:14:25,330 - Let's do it. Let's go. - Go, go, go, go, go, Frank. 351 00:14:25,332 --> 00:14:26,632 - Go. Put the burger down. Go! - Come on, Frank. Come on! 352 00:14:30,003 --> 00:14:31,470 Hot fries. Hot fries. Hot fries. 353 00:14:34,074 --> 00:14:35,209 Sir. Are you okay? 354 00:14:37,945 --> 00:14:38,644 I think we gotta do compressions, man. 355 00:14:38,646 --> 00:14:39,480 Compressions, go. 356 00:14:42,717 --> 00:14:46,351 Whoo! 357 00:14:46,353 --> 00:14:46,654 Come on. Pick it up, grandpa. 358 00:14:50,424 --> 00:14:50,391 Whoo! Oh, God! It's all seeds. 359 00:14:53,728 --> 00:14:57,563 It's all seeds. 360 00:15:02,436 --> 00:15:06,806 - Order up. - Come on. 361 00:15:06,808 --> 00:15:07,174 We did it, Charlie. This chili is maxed out. I mean, I gotta go. 362 00:15:09,042 --> 00:15:12,712 Oh, what? What? No. You can't go. Come on, I got orders, bud. 363 00:15:12,714 --> 00:15:15,447 I gotta go trick The Lawyer. 364 00:15:15,449 --> 00:15:17,784 Come on, I need my expediter. 365 00:15:17,786 --> 00:15:19,418 What? I'll be in here all by myself? 366 00:15:19,420 --> 00:15:20,787 Come on, Frank, I need you, buddy. 367 00:15:20,789 --> 00:15:23,088 -Hey, yo! There he is. -Oh! 368 00:15:23,090 --> 00:15:25,290 - What do you got for us, buddy? - Oh. 369 00:15:25,292 --> 00:15:27,025 - Anything for my first responders. 370 00:15:27,027 --> 00:15:28,059 - My guy. My guy. My guy. Hey! All right. 371 00:15:28,061 --> 00:15:31,463 Whoo-hoo! 372 00:15:31,465 --> 00:15:33,098 -Oh, yeah. -That's hot. 373 00:15:35,436 --> 00:15:37,169 Getting high on your own supply over there? 374 00:15:37,171 --> 00:15:39,204 You mind? 375 00:15:39,206 --> 00:15:40,540 Yeah. Well, I'm in the weeds, boys. 376 00:15:40,542 --> 00:15:42,675 You know, I need it just to get by. 377 00:15:42,677 --> 00:15:43,643 How's it going for you fellas? How's it going out there in the streets? 378 00:15:43,645 --> 00:15:46,278 Highs and lows. I don't love the blood. 379 00:15:46,280 --> 00:15:47,713 A lot of blood in my line of work too. 380 00:15:47,715 --> 00:15:49,948 Well, there shouldn't be. 381 00:15:49,950 --> 00:15:51,617 Yeah, but you get the finger. I got Frank once or twice. 382 00:15:51,619 --> 00:15:52,885 -There really shouldn't be-- -It's life-and-death stuff. 383 00:15:52,887 --> 00:15:55,922 Not really though. 384 00:15:55,924 --> 00:15:57,690 - It is for the animals, I guess. 385 00:15:57,692 --> 00:15:59,458 I always feel like I could use a little more action, you know what I mean? 386 00:15:59,460 --> 00:16:01,426 - You want more spice? - I want more spice. 387 00:16:01,428 --> 00:16:03,161 - Yeah? - Yeah. 388 00:16:03,163 --> 00:16:04,396 Okay. I'm done. 389 00:16:04,398 --> 00:16:05,096 -Pepper me. -Oh! 390 00:16:05,098 --> 00:16:06,933 Bingo! 391 00:16:06,935 --> 00:16:08,734 Dang, what happened to you? 392 00:16:08,736 --> 00:16:10,035 Oh, bike got smashed by a crosstown bus. 393 00:16:10,037 --> 00:16:13,138 -Smashing ups everywhere. -Interesting. 394 00:16:13,140 --> 00:16:13,307 Hey, this-this-this might be the peppers talking here, but, um, go with me. 395 00:16:15,175 --> 00:16:17,745 I'm sensing an opportunity to smash all of these ideas together... 396 00:16:19,179 --> 00:16:22,981 ...and really spice up our lives. 397 00:16:22,983 --> 00:16:24,218 Now I'm gonna float out something that I believe to be... 398 00:16:26,153 --> 00:16:28,453 ...a very reasonable proposition. 399 00:16:30,658 --> 00:16:33,225 What is it? 400 00:16:35,395 --> 00:16:35,429 Okay, I got two smash burgers and a side of curly fries. 401 00:16:37,231 --> 00:16:39,297 -On your left! -Oh, yeah, thank you. 402 00:16:39,299 --> 00:16:41,333 -Thank you what? -Thank you, chef! 403 00:16:41,335 --> 00:16:42,434 -Thank you what? -Thank you, chef! 404 00:16:42,436 --> 00:16:42,770 Corner! 405 00:16:50,812 --> 00:16:51,178 This is the spice I was looking for, baby! 406 00:16:51,946 --> 00:16:53,581 Oh. 407 00:16:55,850 --> 00:16:57,817 Well, well, well. Hmm. New office, huh? 408 00:16:57,819 --> 00:17:00,153 Popcorn ceiling, right next to the highway. This place is trash. 409 00:17:01,689 --> 00:17:03,791 Mr. Reynolds, always a pleasure. 410 00:17:05,392 --> 00:17:08,193 I wanna talk about a settlement. 411 00:17:08,195 --> 00:17:10,362 I bet you do, 412 00:17:10,364 --> 00:17:12,497 because if I were your attorney, 413 00:17:12,499 --> 00:17:13,799 I would be begging for the same thing. 414 00:17:13,801 --> 00:17:16,536 But unfortunately for you... 415 00:17:16,538 --> 00:17:17,739 -Whoo! -...I am not. 416 00:17:19,741 --> 00:17:20,706 My depth perception is terrible. 417 00:17:20,708 --> 00:17:22,209 Why? 418 00:17:23,545 --> 00:17:25,043 Because of the goddamn eye. 419 00:17:25,045 --> 00:17:26,712 What happened to your eye? 420 00:17:26,714 --> 00:17:28,648 Are you serious? 421 00:17:28,650 --> 00:17:29,849 Let's talk about this like gentlemen. 422 00:17:29,851 --> 00:17:32,350 I brought you some chili. 423 00:17:32,352 --> 00:17:33,519 Okay, I'm not eating that. I'm sure it's poison. 424 00:17:33,521 --> 00:17:36,221 Besides, I ordered for myself. 425 00:17:36,223 --> 00:17:38,456 No, my food's better. 426 00:17:38,458 --> 00:17:39,257 And-And there's nothing the matter with that chili. 427 00:17:39,259 --> 00:17:41,493 That is tasty chili. 428 00:17:41,495 --> 00:17:42,962 -I-I promise. -Hey. Lawyer. 429 00:17:42,964 --> 00:17:44,897 -Not now, Dee. -He Postmated. I'm delivering. 430 00:17:44,899 --> 00:17:48,300 Okay-- I don't want any food delivered by any of you. 431 00:17:48,302 --> 00:17:51,537 Oh. Guess what, bozo? I don't care whether you eat it or not, 432 00:17:51,539 --> 00:17:54,040 but if you don't tip me, I'm taking out the other eye. 433 00:17:54,042 --> 00:17:56,374 -Eat mine. -No. 434 00:17:56,376 --> 00:17:59,077 I'll eat some first. Yeah. 435 00:17:59,079 --> 00:17:59,847 -I-I got my own spoon. -All right, this is bullshit. 436 00:18:01,583 --> 00:18:04,082 If you're not gonna tip me, I'm eating your lunch. 437 00:18:04,084 --> 00:18:04,917 -Be my guest. I don't care. -What do you think about this? 438 00:18:07,822 --> 00:18:10,455 This is delicious. 439 00:18:10,457 --> 00:18:11,524 - Yep. - A little hot. Hot, hot, hot. 440 00:18:11,526 --> 00:18:13,593 Mine too. Not-Not in temperature 441 00:18:13,595 --> 00:18:15,360 so much as it's the tiniest bit spicy. 442 00:18:17,832 --> 00:18:19,832 Really enjoying this a lot. 443 00:18:19,834 --> 00:18:22,167 I've got to take a knee. 444 00:18:22,169 --> 00:18:23,871 Oh! Shit, shit, shit, shit. 445 00:18:25,673 --> 00:18:27,105 How can you possibly make a burger so spicy? 446 00:18:30,979 --> 00:18:32,310 - This is so hot. - You've got to try this. 447 00:18:35,248 --> 00:18:36,481 I'll share that with you. 448 00:18:36,483 --> 00:18:39,451 Call 911! 449 00:18:39,453 --> 00:18:39,787 <i>Got a possible</i> code W59 in progress at Snyder and Pattison. 450 00:18:42,056 --> 00:18:45,423 - Pepper? - Pattison? That's like right here. 451 00:18:45,425 --> 00:18:46,491 -Pepper? Pepper, anyone? -Oh, yes. Absolutely. 452 00:18:46,493 --> 00:18:47,862 Yeah. W59? What is that? 453 00:18:49,831 --> 00:18:51,463 -Oh! -Snake bite. That's kind of exciting. 454 00:18:51,465 --> 00:18:54,199 Whoa! That's very interesting to me. 455 00:18:54,201 --> 00:18:56,267 I've always wanted to suck out snake venom, you know this. 456 00:18:56,269 --> 00:18:57,505 -Flaming Pepper taking the call. -Let's take it. 457 00:18:59,907 --> 00:19:01,574 Come on, baby. We're taking the call. 458 00:19:02,810 --> 00:19:04,209 Goddamn it. I'm dying. 459 00:19:04,211 --> 00:19:06,545 Oh, come on. 460 00:19:06,547 --> 00:19:08,547 What is it? What's going? You guys aren't snake bit, are you? 461 00:19:08,549 --> 00:19:09,414 Dee thought that was the only way we could get you guys to come up here. 462 00:19:09,416 --> 00:19:13,284 We said it was a snake bite. 463 00:19:13,286 --> 00:19:14,687 - I was right. - -Guys, this is wonderful. 464 00:19:14,689 --> 00:19:16,354 I have absolutely no idea what the hell is going on here, 465 00:19:16,356 --> 00:19:19,324 but I guarantee you it's going to help me in my suit. 466 00:19:19,326 --> 00:19:20,595 I love watching all of you fail. 467 00:19:21,729 --> 00:19:25,296 Cheers. 468 00:19:25,298 --> 00:19:27,399 I got you! 469 00:19:27,401 --> 00:19:29,401 What... 470 00:19:29,403 --> 00:19:32,505 What's in that? 471 00:19:32,507 --> 00:19:32,640 That is 100% juiced Carolina Reaper tea. 472 00:19:34,474 --> 00:19:38,209 I got him. 473 00:19:38,211 --> 00:19:40,146 Got him. Reaper tea. 474 00:19:40,148 --> 00:19:42,548 Somebody... 475 00:19:42,550 --> 00:19:43,316 What's happening to me? 476 00:19:45,318 --> 00:19:47,520 Are you all right? 477 00:19:47,522 --> 00:19:49,487 We're getting close, guys. Almost there. Just hang on. 478 00:19:49,489 --> 00:19:51,423 How we looking back there? 479 00:19:51,425 --> 00:19:53,893 He's gonna die! 480 00:19:53,895 --> 00:19:55,027 Bamboléo. Bamboléo. Bamboléo. Bamboléo. Bamboléo. 481 00:19:55,029 --> 00:19:57,362 Dee, get those fries out of the fryer, stat. 482 00:19:57,364 --> 00:19:58,564 It just hurts so bad. You're overspicing the food, chef. 483 00:19:58,566 --> 00:20:01,834 What are they doing? 484 00:20:01,836 --> 00:20:02,935 -Enough with the orders. -No, no. Just one more drop. 485 00:20:02,937 --> 00:20:05,470 He's gonna die! Order, order. 486 00:20:09,944 --> 00:20:10,343 Oh, God. It burns! Oh, shit, it burns! 487 00:20:13,147 --> 00:20:16,882 Goddamn it, Dennis. You have to yell "corner!" 488 00:20:16,884 --> 00:20:20,285 - I can't see. - What? 489 00:20:20,287 --> 00:20:22,555 Goddamn it! I think I overdosed on the peppers. 490 00:20:22,557 --> 00:20:24,190 I told you this would happen, Mac. 491 00:20:25,860 --> 00:20:27,995 I can't see. Goddamn it! Goddamn you! 492 00:20:35,136 --> 00:20:36,604 Oh, fuck! 493 00:20:50,952 --> 00:20:54,252 - All right, all right, all right. 494 00:20:54,254 --> 00:20:56,188 I've-I've heard enough. 495 00:20:56,190 --> 00:20:57,890 Joyriding through the city, 496 00:20:57,892 --> 00:20:59,125 serving food without a permit in an unlicensed ambulance, 497 00:20:59,127 --> 00:21:02,895 all while impersonating medical professionals. 498 00:21:02,897 --> 00:21:05,998 For what? Your own twisted amusement? 499 00:21:06,000 --> 00:21:09,502 What have you got to say for yourself? 500 00:21:09,504 --> 00:21:10,403 I swear there were other people there. 501 00:21:12,372 --> 00:21:16,776 I was strapped into a gurney. I passed out. 502 00:21:16,778 --> 00:21:19,412 Uh, they must have put me in an EMT uniform and-and-and fled the scene. 503 00:21:24,619 --> 00:21:25,352 Thirty days, Philly Correctional. 504 00:21:27,822 --> 00:21:29,056 Next case. 504 00:21:30,305 --> 00:22:30,438 Watch Online Movies and Series for FREE www.osdb.link/lm