American Beauty

1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 2 00:00:32,366 --> 00:00:35,118 I need a father who's a role model. 3 00:00:35,285 --> 00:00:37,579 Not some horny geek-boy who's gonna spray his shorts 4 00:00:37,746 --> 00:00:40,165 whenever I bring a girlfriend home from school. 5 00:00:42,834 --> 00:00:44,378 What a lame-o. 6 00:00:47,506 --> 00:00:50,842 Someone really should just put him out of his misery. 7 00:00:53,845 --> 00:00:55,597 Want me to kill him for you? 8 00:01:04,064 --> 00:01:05,941 Yeah. Would you? 9 00:01:19,288 --> 00:01:21,331 <i>My name is Lester Burnham.</i> 10 00:01:22,666 --> 00:01:24,543 <i>This is my neighborhood.</i> 11 00:01:25,794 --> 00:01:27,713 <i>This is my street.</i> 12 00:01:28,672 --> 00:01:31,174 <i>This is my life.</i> 13 00:01:31,925 --> 00:01:34,970 <i>I'm 42 years old. In less than a year...</i> 14 00:01:35,596 --> 00:01:36,763 <i>...I'll be dead.</i> 15 00:01:43,729 --> 00:01:46,732 <i>Of course, I don't know that yet.</i> 16 00:01:50,360 --> 00:01:53,697 <i>And in a way, I'm dead already.</i> 17 00:02:04,541 --> 00:02:06,043 <i>Look at me.</i> 18 00:02:06,209 --> 00:02:07,878 <i>Jerking off in the shower.</i> 19 00:02:09,630 --> 00:02:12,382 <i>This will be the high point of my day.</i> 20 00:02:12,549 --> 00:02:14,885 <i>It's all downhill from here.</i> 21 00:02:19,890 --> 00:02:21,600 <i>That's my wife, Carolyn.</i> 22 00:02:23,352 --> 00:02:27,564 <i>See the way the handle on those pruning shears matches her gardening clogs?</i> 23 00:02:28,398 --> 00:02:29,900 <i>That's not an accident.</i> 24 00:02:30,817 --> 00:02:33,236 Hush, Bitsy! 25 00:02:33,403 --> 00:02:35,072 Hush! What is wrong with you? 26 00:02:35,238 --> 00:02:37,240 <i>That's our next door neighbor, Jim.</i> 27 00:02:38,241 --> 00:02:41,078 <i>And that's his lover... Jim.</i> 28 00:02:41,328 --> 00:02:42,704 You spoil her. Bitsy... 29 00:02:42,871 --> 00:02:45,332 - Me? - ...no bark! Come inside now! 30 00:02:45,499 --> 00:02:47,834 - Come on. - Good morning, Jim! 31 00:02:48,001 --> 00:02:50,087 Morning, Carolyn. 32 00:02:51,129 --> 00:02:54,299 I love your tie. That color! 33 00:02:54,466 --> 00:02:56,134 I just love your roses. 34 00:02:56,301 --> 00:02:58,887 How do you get them to flourish like this? 35 00:02:59,054 --> 00:03:02,683 Well, I'll tell you: eggshells and Miracle-Gro. 36 00:03:02,849 --> 00:03:04,726 - I've never heard of that. <i>- Man...</i> 37 00:03:04,893 --> 00:03:07,437 <i>...I get exhausted just watching her.</i> 38 00:03:08,313 --> 00:03:11,483 <i>She wasn't always like this. She used to be happy.</i> 39 00:03:14,027 --> 00:03:15,737 <i>We used to be happy.</i> 40 00:03:18,323 --> 00:03:21,576 <i>My daughter, Jane. Only child.</i> 41 00:03:24,746 --> 00:03:27,290 <i>Janie's a pretty typical teenager:</i> 42 00:03:27,457 --> 00:03:30,752 <i>angry, insecure, confused.</i> 43 00:03:31,795 --> 00:03:34,798 <i>I wish I could tell her that's all going to pass</i> 44 00:03:34,965 --> 00:03:36,800 <i>but I don't want to lie to her.</i> 45 00:03:41,346 --> 00:03:44,057 Jane, honey, are you trying to look unattractive? 46 00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:45,475 Yes. 47 00:03:45,642 --> 00:03:48,270 Congratulations, you've succeeded admirably. 48 00:03:48,437 --> 00:03:52,858 Lester, could you make me a little later? I'm not quite late enough. 49 00:03:56,862 --> 00:03:58,488 Nice going, Dad. 50 00:03:58,655 --> 00:04:02,826 <i>Both my wife and daughter think I'm this gigantic loser.</i> 51 00:04:02,993 --> 00:04:04,828 <i>And they're right.</i> 52 00:04:07,164 --> 00:04:09,458 <i>I have lost something.</i> 53 00:04:09,624 --> 00:04:11,835 <i>I'm not exactly sure what it is,</i> 54 00:04:12,002 --> 00:04:17,507 <i>but I know I didn't always feel this... sedated.</i> 55 00:04:19,009 --> 00:04:20,927 <i>But you know what?</i> 56 00:04:21,094 --> 00:04:24,347 <i>It's never too late to get it back.</i> 57 00:04:26,141 --> 00:04:29,019 Hello. This is Lester Burnham from <i>Media Monthly</i> magazine. 58 00:04:29,186 --> 00:04:31,021 I'm calling for Mr. Tamblin, please. 59 00:04:32,063 --> 00:04:34,316 Well, we're all under a deadline here. 60 00:04:34,483 --> 00:04:36,693 There's some information about your product launch 61 00:04:36,860 --> 00:04:38,987 that isn't even covered in your press release and... 62 00:04:40,864 --> 00:04:43,116 Yeah, OK. Can I ask you a question? 63 00:04:43,283 --> 00:04:45,452 Who is Tamblin? Does he exist? 64 00:04:45,619 --> 00:04:47,454 'Cause he doesn't ever seem to come in. 65 00:04:48,997 --> 00:04:50,624 Yeah, OK. I'll leave my number. 66 00:04:50,791 --> 00:04:55,128 It's 555-0199. 67 00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:58,381 Lester Burnham. Thank you. 68 00:05:00,300 --> 00:05:01,510 Hey, Les. 69 00:05:02,844 --> 00:05:04,304 You got a minute? 70 00:05:04,471 --> 00:05:07,140 For you, Brad, I got five. 71 00:05:08,225 --> 00:05:10,685 So I'm sure you can understand 72 00:05:10,852 --> 00:05:12,646 our need to cut corners around here. 73 00:05:12,813 --> 00:05:16,691 Sure. Times are tight. You got to free up some cash. 74 00:05:16,858 --> 00:05:19,236 You got to spend money to make money, right? 75 00:05:19,402 --> 00:05:23,073 - Exactly. - Like the time when Mr. Flournoy 76 00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:26,076 used the company MasterCard to pay for that hooker, 77 00:05:26,243 --> 00:05:29,496 then she used the card and stayed at the St. Regis for three months... 78 00:05:29,663 --> 00:05:32,749 - That's unsubstantiated gossip! - That's $50,000! 79 00:05:32,916 --> 00:05:34,751 That's someone's salary who's gonna get fired 80 00:05:34,918 --> 00:05:36,920 because Craig has to pay women to fuck him! 81 00:05:37,087 --> 00:05:40,674 Jesus! Calm down. 82 00:05:40,841 --> 00:05:42,592 Nobody's getting fired yet. 83 00:05:42,759 --> 00:05:46,763 That's why we're having everyone write out a job description 84 00:05:46,930 --> 00:05:49,724 mapping out in detail how they contribute. 85 00:05:49,891 --> 00:05:52,978 That way management can assess who's valuable... 86 00:05:53,144 --> 00:05:55,063 And who's expendable. 87 00:05:56,481 --> 00:05:58,316 It's just business. 88 00:06:00,277 --> 00:06:04,281 I've been writing for this magazine for 14 years. You've been here a month? 89 00:06:04,447 --> 00:06:06,533 I'm one of the good guys, Les. 90 00:06:07,742 --> 00:06:09,452 I'm trying to level with you. 91 00:06:10,161 --> 00:06:13,039 This is your one chance to save your job. 92 00:06:15,458 --> 00:06:17,502 There's no decision. Just write the damn thing. 93 00:06:17,669 --> 00:06:20,338 You don't think it's weird and kind of fascist? 94 00:06:20,505 --> 00:06:22,674 Possibly, but you don't want to be unemployed. 95 00:06:22,841 --> 00:06:25,760 Let's sell our souls and work for Satan because it's more convenient. 96 00:06:25,927 --> 00:06:28,805 Could you be a little bit more dramatic, please? 97 00:06:28,972 --> 00:06:31,641 So we finally got new neighbors. 98 00:06:31,808 --> 00:06:35,812 If the Lomans had let me represent them instead of the Real Estate King 99 00:06:35,979 --> 00:06:38,315 that house would never have sat on the market for six months. 100 00:06:38,481 --> 00:06:41,276 They were still mad at you for cutting down their sycamore. 101 00:06:41,443 --> 00:06:43,862 Their sycamore? Come on! 102 00:06:44,029 --> 00:06:47,616 A substantial portion of the root structure was on our property. 103 00:06:47,782 --> 00:06:49,576 How can you call it their sycamore? 104 00:06:49,743 --> 00:06:54,331 I wouldn't have the heart to cut down something if it wasn't partially mine. 105 00:07:05,842 --> 00:07:08,720 Mom, do we always have to listen to this elevator music? 106 00:07:10,472 --> 00:07:12,682 No. No, we don't. 107 00:07:12,849 --> 00:07:16,770 As soon as you've prepared a nutritious, yet savory, meal that I'm about to eat 108 00:07:16,937 --> 00:07:19,064 you can listen to whatever you like. 109 00:07:22,943 --> 00:07:25,987 So, Janie, how was school? 110 00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:29,115 It was OK. 111 00:07:29,282 --> 00:07:30,742 Just OK? 112 00:07:31,743 --> 00:07:35,330 No, Dad. It was spectacular. 113 00:07:38,959 --> 00:07:41,711 Well, you want to know how things went at my job today? 114 00:07:41,878 --> 00:07:44,297 They've hired this efficiency expert. 115 00:07:44,464 --> 00:07:48,385 This really friendly guy named Brad. How perfect is that? 116 00:07:48,551 --> 00:07:52,889 He's there to make it seem like they're justified in firing somebody 117 00:07:53,056 --> 00:07:55,600 because they couldn't just come right out and say that. 118 00:07:55,767 --> 00:07:57,602 That would just be too honest. 119 00:07:57,769 --> 00:08:01,356 So they've asked us. You couldn't possibly care less, could you? 120 00:08:02,607 --> 00:08:04,234 Well, what do you expect? 121 00:08:04,401 --> 00:08:07,904 You can't all of a sudden be my best friend just because you had a bad day. 122 00:08:10,407 --> 00:08:14,285 I mean, hello! You've barely even spoken to me for months. 123 00:08:20,834 --> 00:08:25,422 What? You're Mother of the Year? You treat her like an employee. 124 00:08:25,588 --> 00:08:27,173 What? 125 00:08:29,676 --> 00:08:30,760 What?! 126 00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:35,265 I'm going to get some ice cream. 127 00:08:43,690 --> 00:08:44,941 Janie... 128 00:08:46,317 --> 00:08:49,446 I'm sorry I haven't been more... 129 00:08:50,447 --> 00:08:52,782 ...available. I'm just... I... 130 00:08:56,036 --> 00:08:59,122 You know, you don't always have to wait for me to come to you. 131 00:09:00,790 --> 00:09:02,959 Great. So now it's my fault? 132 00:09:03,126 --> 00:09:05,712 I didn't say that. It's nobody's fault. 133 00:09:07,797 --> 00:09:11,051 Janie, what happened? We used to be pals. 134 00:09:11,051 --> 00:09:41,051 <b>Subtitle | www.movieddl.me</b> 135 00:10:50,900 --> 00:10:53,736 I will sell this house today. 136 00:11:04,455 --> 00:11:07,083 I will sell this house today. 137 00:11:07,250 --> 00:11:09,252 I will sell this house today. 138 00:11:23,183 --> 00:11:25,935 I will sell this house today. 139 00:11:34,319 --> 00:11:37,071 Welcome. I'm Carolyn Burnham. 140 00:11:37,238 --> 00:11:40,366 This living room is very dramatic. 141 00:11:40,533 --> 00:11:43,203 Wait till you see the native stone fireplace! 142 00:11:43,369 --> 00:11:46,497 A simple cream could really lighten things up. 143 00:11:46,664 --> 00:11:48,666 You could even put in a skylight. 144 00:11:51,586 --> 00:11:53,630 Well, why don't we go into the kitchen? 145 00:11:53,796 --> 00:11:57,091 It's a dream come true for any cook. 146 00:11:57,258 --> 00:11:59,802 Just filled with positive energy. 147 00:12:00,720 --> 00:12:05,725 You'll be surprised how much a ceiling fan can cut down on your energy costs. 148 00:12:09,145 --> 00:12:13,816 You know, you could have some really fun backyard get-togethers out here. 149 00:12:13,983 --> 00:12:15,860 The ad said this pool was "lagoon-like." 150 00:12:16,027 --> 00:12:19,781 - Nothing "lagoon-like" about it. - Except for maybe the bugs! 151 00:12:19,948 --> 00:12:21,741 There aren't even any plants out here! 152 00:12:21,908 --> 00:12:24,744 What do you call this? Is this not this a plant? 153 00:12:24,911 --> 00:12:28,790 If you have a problem with the plants, I can call my landscape architect. 154 00:12:28,957 --> 00:12:31,709 - Solved! - I think lagoon, I think waterfall. 155 00:12:31,876 --> 00:12:36,005 I think tropical. This is a cement hole. 156 00:12:39,133 --> 00:12:41,302 I have some tiki torches in the garage. 157 00:13:13,584 --> 00:13:14,919 Shut up! 158 00:13:15,086 --> 00:13:18,214 Stop it! You weak. You baby! Shut up! 159 00:13:18,381 --> 00:13:20,216 Shut up! Shut up! 160 00:14:06,095 --> 00:14:07,930 Who are you looking for? 161 00:14:08,097 --> 00:14:10,475 My parents are coming tonight. 162 00:14:10,641 --> 00:14:13,978 They're trying to, you know, take an active interest in me. 163 00:14:14,145 --> 00:14:16,606 Gross. I hate it when my mom does that. 164 00:14:17,440 --> 00:14:21,110 They're such assholes. Why can't they just have their own lives? 165 00:14:25,782 --> 00:14:28,451 What makes you so sure she wants us to be there? Did she ask? 166 00:14:28,618 --> 00:14:32,121 Of course not. She doesn't want us to know how important this is to her. 167 00:14:32,288 --> 00:14:34,123 But she's been practicing her steps for weeks. 168 00:14:34,290 --> 00:14:36,167 I'll bet money she'll resent it. 169 00:14:36,334 --> 00:14:38,544 And I'm missing the James Bond marathon on <i>TNT.</i> 170 00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:40,797 Lester! This is important! 171 00:14:40,963 --> 00:14:43,633 I'm sensing a real distance growing between you and Jane. 172 00:14:43,800 --> 00:14:46,552 Growing? She hates me. 173 00:14:46,719 --> 00:14:48,304 She's just willful. 174 00:14:48,471 --> 00:14:50,181 She hates you, too. 175 00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:01,234 I'm sorry, I'm sorry. 176 00:15:01,401 --> 00:15:04,195 Pardon me. Excuse me. 177 00:15:05,029 --> 00:15:07,323 Now, for your halftime entertainment, 178 00:15:07,490 --> 00:15:11,619 Rockwell High's award-winning Dancing Spartanettes! 179 00:15:11,786 --> 00:15:13,955 We can leave right after this, right? 180 00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:30,466 Shit! They're still here. 181 00:17:31,384 --> 00:17:34,971 - Janie! - Hey, I really enjoyed that! 182 00:17:35,137 --> 00:17:37,974 - Congratulations! You were great! - I didn't win anything. 183 00:17:38,140 --> 00:17:40,059 Hi, I'm Lester, Janie's dad. 184 00:17:40,226 --> 00:17:41,769 Oh, hi. 185 00:17:45,022 --> 00:17:46,983 This is my friend, Angela Hayes. 186 00:17:47,149 --> 00:17:50,444 OK. Good to meet you. 187 00:17:50,611 --> 00:17:53,155 You were also good tonight. Very... 188 00:17:54,907 --> 00:17:57,118 - ...precise. - Thanks. 189 00:17:57,285 --> 00:18:00,121 Nice to meet you, Angela. Honey! 190 00:18:00,288 --> 00:18:03,249 I am so proud of you! You know, I watched you very closely. 191 00:18:03,416 --> 00:18:05,209 You didn't screw up once! 192 00:18:06,669 --> 00:18:09,005 OK. We have to go. 193 00:18:10,047 --> 00:18:12,425 - So what are you girls doing now? - Dad! 194 00:18:12,592 --> 00:18:14,427 We're going out for pizza. 195 00:18:14,594 --> 00:18:17,096 Really? We can give you a ride. I have a car. Want to come with us? 196 00:18:17,263 --> 00:18:19,515 Thanks, but I have a car. 197 00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:22,977 You have a car. Well, that's great. That's great. 198 00:18:23,144 --> 00:18:26,355 'Cause Janie's thinking about getting a car soon, aren't you? 199 00:18:26,522 --> 00:18:28,691 Dad! Mom's waiting for you. 200 00:18:32,361 --> 00:18:34,405 It was very nice meeting you, Angela. 201 00:18:35,698 --> 00:18:37,742 Any friend of Janie's is... 202 00:18:38,909 --> 00:18:40,536 ...a friend of mine. 203 00:18:44,707 --> 00:18:46,042 Well... 204 00:18:47,335 --> 00:18:48,753 ...I'll be seeing you around, then. 205 00:18:53,424 --> 00:18:57,136 Could he be any more... pathetic? 206 00:18:57,303 --> 00:18:59,180 I think he's sweet. 207 00:19:00,765 --> 00:19:04,560 And I think he and your mother have not had sex in a long time. 208 00:19:22,453 --> 00:19:24,163 <i>It's the weirdest thing.</i> 209 00:19:25,081 --> 00:19:28,584 <i>I feel like I've been in a coma for about 20 years</i> 210 00:19:28,751 --> 00:19:31,087 <i>and I'm just now waking up.</i> 211 00:20:02,159 --> 00:20:05,496 <i>Spectacular.</i> 212 00:20:14,380 --> 00:20:17,800 I'm so sorry my dad was weird tonight. 213 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:21,595 That's OK. 214 00:20:21,762 --> 00:20:23,639 I'm used to guys drooling over me. 215 00:20:25,933 --> 00:20:27,643 It started when I was about 12. 216 00:20:28,936 --> 00:20:30,896 I'd go to dinner with my parents. 217 00:20:31,063 --> 00:20:33,482 Every Thursday night, Red Lobster. 218 00:20:34,483 --> 00:20:37,069 And every guy there would stare at me when I walked in. 219 00:20:37,236 --> 00:20:39,155 And I knew what they were thinking. 220 00:20:39,321 --> 00:20:42,199 Just like I knew guys at school thought about me when they jerked off. 221 00:20:43,325 --> 00:20:46,162 - Vomit. - No, I liked it. 222 00:20:46,328 --> 00:20:48,289 And I still like it. 223 00:20:48,456 --> 00:20:51,000 If people I don't even know look at me and want to fuck me 224 00:20:51,167 --> 00:20:56,881 it means I really have a shot at being a model, which is great. 225 00:20:57,631 --> 00:21:01,635 Because there's nothing worse in life than being ordinary. 226 00:21:05,848 --> 00:21:07,767 I really think it'll happen for you. 227 00:21:09,393 --> 00:21:11,395 I know. 228 00:21:11,562 --> 00:21:14,690 Because everything that was meant to happen, does... 229 00:21:14,857 --> 00:21:16,400 ...eventually. 230 00:21:41,759 --> 00:21:43,302 Asshole. 231 00:22:48,450 --> 00:22:49,451 <i>Hello?</i> 232 00:22:50,828 --> 00:22:51,996 <i>Hello?</i> 233 00:23:08,137 --> 00:23:10,556 - Hello? - Why'd you call me? 234 00:23:10,723 --> 00:23:12,308 <i>I didn't.</i> 235 00:23:12,474 --> 00:23:15,019 My phone rang and I answered, and somebody hung up. 236 00:23:15,185 --> 00:23:16,979 I star-69ed, and I called you back. 237 00:23:17,146 --> 00:23:19,064 Well, I was in the shower. 238 00:23:24,111 --> 00:23:25,779 Oh, gross! 239 00:23:41,629 --> 00:23:43,964 <i>Ricky? Breakfast!</i> 240 00:23:46,342 --> 00:23:48,052 Be right there. 241 00:23:57,186 --> 00:23:58,312 - Mom? - Hello. 242 00:23:58,479 --> 00:24:00,814 I don't eat bacon, remember? 243 00:24:02,942 --> 00:24:04,401 I'm sorry. I must've forgotten. 244 00:24:16,038 --> 00:24:17,748 What's new in the world, Dad? 245 00:24:19,416 --> 00:24:22,211 This country is going straight to hell. 246 00:24:30,511 --> 00:24:32,554 - Are you expecting anyone? - No. 247 00:24:36,558 --> 00:24:37,726 No. 248 00:24:44,984 --> 00:24:47,111 - Hi. - Welcome to the neighborhood. 249 00:24:47,277 --> 00:24:48,737 Just something from our garden. 250 00:24:48,904 --> 00:24:51,073 Except the pasta. We got that at Fallaci's. 251 00:24:51,240 --> 00:24:54,243 It's unbelievably fresh. Drop it in the water and it's done. 252 00:24:56,412 --> 00:24:59,581 Jim Olmeyer. Two doors down. Welcome to the neighborhood. 253 00:24:59,748 --> 00:25:02,084 Colonel Frank Fitts, US Marine Corps. 254 00:25:02,251 --> 00:25:05,754 - Nice to meet you. This is my partner. - Jim Berkley, but people call me J.B. 255 00:25:05,921 --> 00:25:09,216 Let's cut to the chase, OK? What are you guys selling? 256 00:25:10,926 --> 00:25:13,345 Nothing. We just wanted to say hi to our new neighbors. 257 00:25:13,512 --> 00:25:15,597 Yeah, yeah... 258 00:25:15,764 --> 00:25:18,934 You said you're partners, so what's your business? 259 00:25:20,602 --> 00:25:21,770 Well... 260 00:25:22,688 --> 00:25:24,606 He is a tax attorney. 261 00:25:24,773 --> 00:25:26,608 And he's an anesthesiologist. 262 00:25:36,452 --> 00:25:40,289 How come these faggots always have to rub it in your face? 263 00:25:41,957 --> 00:25:43,959 How can they be so shameless? 264 00:25:46,962 --> 00:25:48,630 That's the whole thing, Dad. 265 00:25:48,797 --> 00:25:51,258 They don't feel that's anything to be ashamed of. 266 00:25:53,135 --> 00:25:54,887 Well, it is. 267 00:25:57,347 --> 00:25:58,807 Yeah, you're right. 268 00:25:58,974 --> 00:26:01,685 Don't placate me like I'm your mother, boy. 269 00:26:05,189 --> 00:26:07,566 Forgive me, sir, for speaking so bluntly: 270 00:26:07,733 --> 00:26:10,486 Those fags make me want to puke my fucking guts out. 271 00:26:18,452 --> 00:26:20,162 Well, me too, Son. 272 00:26:21,497 --> 00:26:22,956 Yeah, me too. 273 00:26:29,129 --> 00:26:32,591 I'm serious. He just pulled down his pants and yanked it out. 274 00:26:32,758 --> 00:26:35,177 You know, like, "Say hello to Mr. Happy." 275 00:26:35,344 --> 00:26:38,222 - Gross. - It wasn't gross. 276 00:26:38,388 --> 00:26:41,183 - It was kind of cool. - So did you do it with him? 277 00:26:41,350 --> 00:26:42,768 Of course I did. 278 00:26:42,935 --> 00:26:45,604 He is a really well-known photographer. 279 00:26:45,771 --> 00:26:48,524 He shoots for <i>Elle</i> on, like, a regular basis. 280 00:26:48,690 --> 00:26:51,151 It would've been so majorly stupid of me to turn him down. 281 00:26:51,318 --> 00:26:53,487 You are a total prostitute. 282 00:26:54,363 --> 00:26:57,533 Hey. That's how things really are. 283 00:26:57,699 --> 00:27:01,411 You just don't know because you're this pampered little suburban chick. 284 00:27:01,578 --> 00:27:05,165 So are you. You've only been in <i>Seventeen</i> once, and you looked fat! 285 00:27:05,332 --> 00:27:09,002 So stop acting like you're goddamned Christy Turlington! 286 00:27:11,505 --> 00:27:12,840 Cunt! 287 00:27:14,716 --> 00:27:18,178 I am so sick of people taking their insecurities out on me. 288 00:27:20,430 --> 00:27:23,600 Oh, my God! That's the pervert who filmed me last night. 289 00:27:23,767 --> 00:27:27,229 Him? Jane, no way, he's a total lunatic. 290 00:27:27,396 --> 00:27:29,231 - You know him? - Yeah. 291 00:27:29,398 --> 00:27:31,733 We were on the same lunch shift when I was in ninth grade 292 00:27:31,900 --> 00:27:35,070 and he would always say the most random, weird things. 293 00:27:35,237 --> 00:27:38,907 And then one day, he was just, like, gone. 294 00:27:39,741 --> 00:27:42,411 And then, Connie Cardullo told me 295 00:27:42,578 --> 00:27:45,539 that his parents had to put him in a mental institution. 296 00:27:45,706 --> 00:27:47,791 Why? What did he do? 297 00:27:48,750 --> 00:27:49,751 What do you mean? 298 00:27:50,669 --> 00:27:54,923 Well, they can't put you away just for saying weird things. 299 00:27:57,384 --> 00:28:00,470 You total slut! 300 00:28:01,346 --> 00:28:03,765 - You've got a crush on him! - What? Please! 301 00:28:03,932 --> 00:28:07,519 You're defending him. You love him. You want to have 10,000 of his babies. 302 00:28:07,686 --> 00:28:09,938 - Shut up! - Hi. 303 00:28:10,105 --> 00:28:13,108 My name's Ricky. I just moved next door to you. 304 00:28:13,275 --> 00:28:15,235 I know. 305 00:28:15,402 --> 00:28:19,406 I remember this really creepy incident where you were filming me last night. 306 00:28:19,573 --> 00:28:22,951 I didn't mean to scare you. I just think you're interesting. 307 00:28:23,118 --> 00:28:28,290 Thanks, but I don't need some psycho obsessing about me right now. 308 00:28:29,416 --> 00:28:32,502 I'm not obsessing. I'm just curious. 309 00:28:48,560 --> 00:28:50,479 What a freak! 310 00:28:50,646 --> 00:28:52,648 And why does he dress like a Bible salesman? 311 00:28:54,233 --> 00:28:57,069 He's, like, so confident. 312 00:28:57,236 --> 00:28:59,655 That can't be real. 313 00:29:01,156 --> 00:29:02,908 I don't believe him. 314 00:29:03,075 --> 00:29:06,286 I mean, he didn't even look at me once. 315 00:29:12,167 --> 00:29:13,543 <i>How'd you get in the Army?</i> 316 00:29:13,710 --> 00:29:16,171 <i>Look, Sergeant, I got three reasons for being in the Army.</i> 317 00:29:16,338 --> 00:29:20,342 <i>First, I'm patriotic. Second, I love my country. And third, they nailed me.</i> 318 00:29:23,011 --> 00:29:25,722 <i>You two boys report to me immediately after this formation.</i> 319 00:29:25,889 --> 00:29:27,307 <i>Take them away, Sarge!</i> 320 00:29:34,773 --> 00:29:36,900 Hey. 321 00:29:37,067 --> 00:29:39,653 <i>One, two, three, four.</i> 322 00:29:39,820 --> 00:29:41,697 <i>What's going on here?</i> 323 00:29:41,863 --> 00:29:44,366 <i>Bend all the way down. Here comes the bull of the woods.</i> 324 00:29:46,285 --> 00:29:48,078 I'm sorry, what? 325 00:29:50,080 --> 00:29:52,165 Mom, nobody said anything. 326 00:29:52,332 --> 00:29:54,876 Oh. I'm sorry. 327 00:30:01,800 --> 00:30:05,220 Everyone's with their spouse. How'd it look if I showed up with no one? 328 00:30:05,387 --> 00:30:08,348 - You end up ignoring me and talking... - Now listen to me. 329 00:30:08,515 --> 00:30:10,142 This is an important business function. 330 00:30:10,309 --> 00:30:13,395 As you know, my business is selling an image 331 00:30:13,562 --> 00:30:16,106 and part of my job is to live that image... 332 00:30:16,273 --> 00:30:17,733 Honey, do me a favor. 333 00:30:17,899 --> 00:30:20,527 Just say whatever you want to say and spare me the propaganda. 334 00:30:20,694 --> 00:30:23,196 All right. Hi, Shirley! 335 00:30:25,073 --> 00:30:27,826 Listen, just do me a favor. Act happy tonight. 336 00:30:27,993 --> 00:30:30,746 - I am happy, honey. - No, you're not. 337 00:30:30,912 --> 00:30:32,706 Oh! That's Buddy! 338 00:30:32,873 --> 00:30:35,250 Buddy. Buddy! 339 00:30:35,417 --> 00:30:38,920 - Hi. - Hi! Good to see you again. 340 00:30:39,087 --> 00:30:41,840 It's so good to see you, too, Catherine. 341 00:30:42,007 --> 00:30:45,427 - Carolyn. - Carolyn, of course. How are you? 342 00:30:45,594 --> 00:30:47,387 Very well, thank you. 343 00:30:47,554 --> 00:30:49,473 - Hello, Christy. - Hello. 344 00:30:51,016 --> 00:30:53,602 - My husband, Lester. - It's a pleasure. 345 00:30:53,769 --> 00:30:56,438 We've met before, actually. This thing last year. 346 00:30:56,605 --> 00:31:00,233 - Christmas at the Sheraton. - Oh, yeah. 347 00:31:01,276 --> 00:31:03,695 It's OK. I wouldn't remember me, either. 348 00:31:08,492 --> 00:31:10,243 Honey, don't be weird! 349 00:31:11,203 --> 00:31:13,747 - All right, honey. I won't be weird. - OK. 350 00:31:13,914 --> 00:31:18,210 - I'll be whatever you want me to be. - Well, OK... 351 00:31:29,596 --> 00:31:32,849 - We have a very healthy relationship. - I see. 352 00:31:37,020 --> 00:31:39,481 Well, I don't know about you guys, but I need a drink. 353 00:31:46,488 --> 00:31:48,448 Put a little more in there, cowboy. 354 00:32:04,506 --> 00:32:05,507 Excuse me. 355 00:32:06,842 --> 00:32:09,719 Don't you live on Robin Hood Trail? The house with the red door? 356 00:32:10,345 --> 00:32:11,346 Yeah. 357 00:32:11,513 --> 00:32:14,724 I'm Ricky Fitts. I just moved in the house next to you. 358 00:32:16,852 --> 00:32:19,020 Hi, Ricky Fitts. I'm Lester Burnham. 359 00:32:19,187 --> 00:32:21,690 Hi, Mr. Burnham. 360 00:32:31,908 --> 00:32:32,909 Do you party? 361 00:32:34,453 --> 00:32:37,372 - Excuse me? - Do you get high? 362 00:32:41,126 --> 00:32:44,379 I probably wouldn't even tell you this if I weren't a little tipsy 363 00:32:44,546 --> 00:32:49,217 but... I'm in complete awe of you. 364 00:32:50,510 --> 00:32:56,391 I mean, your firm is hands down the Rolls Royce of local real estate firms 365 00:32:56,558 --> 00:32:59,728 and your personal sales record is... 366 00:33:02,147 --> 00:33:04,191 It's very intimidating. 367 00:33:05,066 --> 00:33:09,488 You know, I'd love to sit down with you and just pick your brain. 368 00:33:09,654 --> 00:33:11,698 If you'd ever be willing. 369 00:33:14,159 --> 00:33:17,537 You know? I suppose, technically, I'm the competition 370 00:33:17,704 --> 00:33:21,416 but, I mean, I don't flatter myself 371 00:33:21,583 --> 00:33:24,377 that I'm even in the same league as you. 372 00:33:24,544 --> 00:33:26,254 I don't. 373 00:33:27,297 --> 00:33:28,715 I'd love to. 374 00:33:30,926 --> 00:33:33,720 - Really? - Absolutely. 375 00:33:33,887 --> 00:33:36,848 Call my secretary. Have her schedule a lunch. 376 00:33:38,850 --> 00:33:40,852 I'll do that. Thank you. 377 00:33:47,776 --> 00:33:52,364 Did you see that movie where the body is walking around carrying its own head 378 00:33:52,531 --> 00:33:55,200 and then the head goes down on that babe? 379 00:33:55,367 --> 00:33:57,661 <i>Re-Animator.</i> 380 00:34:00,830 --> 00:34:05,126 Look, I'm not paying you to do whatever it is you're doing out here. 381 00:34:06,127 --> 00:34:08,129 Fine. So don't pay me. 382 00:34:09,548 --> 00:34:11,925 - Excuse me? - I quit. 383 00:34:12,092 --> 00:34:15,345 So you don't have to pay me. Now leave me alone. 384 00:34:17,889 --> 00:34:19,224 Asshole. 385 00:34:24,521 --> 00:34:26,690 I think you just became my personal hero. 386 00:34:27,816 --> 00:34:31,069 Doesn't that make you nervous, just quitting your job like that? 387 00:34:32,988 --> 00:34:35,657 Well, I guess when you're all of, what, 16... 388 00:34:35,824 --> 00:34:37,534 Eighteen. 389 00:34:38,493 --> 00:34:40,662 I just do these gigs as a cover. 390 00:34:40,829 --> 00:34:43,456 I have other sources of income. 391 00:34:44,708 --> 00:34:46,209 But my dad interferes less in my life 392 00:34:46,376 --> 00:34:49,963 when I pretend to be an upstanding young citizen with a respectable job. 393 00:34:50,130 --> 00:34:51,881 Lester?! 394 00:34:55,010 --> 00:34:56,177 What are you doing? 395 00:34:56,344 --> 00:34:59,556 Honey, this... Ricky Fitts. 396 00:35:01,016 --> 00:35:03,143 This is Ricky Fitts. 397 00:35:05,604 --> 00:35:08,690 I'm Ricky Fitts. I just moved into the house next to you. 398 00:35:08,857 --> 00:35:10,567 I go to school with your daughter. 399 00:35:12,235 --> 00:35:13,862 With Jane? 400 00:35:14,029 --> 00:35:16,031 - Yeah. Jane. - Really? 401 00:35:17,240 --> 00:35:19,951 Hi. I'm ready to go. 402 00:35:20,118 --> 00:35:21,703 I'll meet you out front. 403 00:35:26,875 --> 00:35:29,044 I'm in trouble! 404 00:35:31,212 --> 00:35:34,215 Nice meeting you, Ricky Fitts. Thanks for the... thing. 405 00:35:34,382 --> 00:35:36,051 Anytime. Lester! 406 00:35:37,677 --> 00:35:40,013 If you want any more, you know where I live. 407 00:35:55,362 --> 00:35:58,573 Shit. They're home. Quick, let's go up to my room. 408 00:35:58,740 --> 00:36:00,492 I should say hi to your dad. 409 00:36:01,368 --> 00:36:03,244 I don't want to be rude. 410 00:36:16,174 --> 00:36:17,300 Nice suit. 411 00:36:19,761 --> 00:36:21,513 You're looking good, Mr. Burnham. 412 00:36:21,680 --> 00:36:24,724 Last time I saw you, you looked kind of wound up. 413 00:36:29,771 --> 00:36:31,231 Is that root beer? 414 00:37:30,999 --> 00:37:32,876 I love root beer, don't you? 415 00:37:35,503 --> 00:37:37,464 - Hey. - Hi, Mom. 416 00:37:37,630 --> 00:37:39,632 You remember Angela? 417 00:37:39,799 --> 00:37:41,760 Yes, of course. 418 00:37:41,926 --> 00:37:44,304 I forgot to tell you, she's gonna spend the night. Is that OK? 419 00:37:53,646 --> 00:37:55,273 Sorry about my dad. 420 00:37:55,440 --> 00:37:57,192 Don't be. I think it's funny. 421 00:37:58,318 --> 00:38:02,363 Yeah, to you, he's just another guy who wants to jump your bones. 422 00:38:02,530 --> 00:38:07,202 But to me, he's just... too embarrassing to live. 423 00:38:08,703 --> 00:38:12,415 Well, your mom's the one who's embarrassing. What a phony. 424 00:38:12,582 --> 00:38:14,459 But your dad's actually kind of cute. 425 00:38:14,626 --> 00:38:15,960 Shut up. 426 00:38:16,127 --> 00:38:19,631 He is. If he just worked out a little, he'd be hot. 427 00:38:19,798 --> 00:38:21,800 - Shut up! - Come on! 428 00:38:21,966 --> 00:38:24,385 Like you've never sneaked a peek at him in his underwear? 429 00:38:24,552 --> 00:38:26,346 I bet he's got a big dick. 430 00:38:26,513 --> 00:38:29,057 You are so grossing me out right now! 431 00:38:29,224 --> 00:38:32,352 If he built up his chest and arms, I would totally fuck him! 432 00:38:32,519 --> 00:38:36,815 I would! I would suck on your dad's big, fat dick 433 00:38:36,981 --> 00:38:40,485 and then I'd fuck him until his eyes rolled back in his head! 434 00:38:40,652 --> 00:38:42,737 Jane! What's that noise? 435 00:38:46,407 --> 00:38:49,035 - I swear I heard something. - Yeah. 436 00:38:49,202 --> 00:38:51,830 That was the sound of you being a huge, disgusting pig. 437 00:38:51,996 --> 00:38:55,667 No, I'm serious. See? 438 00:38:58,461 --> 00:39:00,755 - Oh, my God, Jane. - What is it? 439 00:39:04,592 --> 00:39:09,138 It's that psycho next door. Jane, what if he worships you? 440 00:39:09,722 --> 00:39:12,350 What if he's got, like, a shrine with pictures of you 441 00:39:12,517 --> 00:39:14,853 surrounded by dead people's heads and stuff? 442 00:39:15,019 --> 00:39:17,939 Shit. I bet he's filming us right now. 443 00:39:18,982 --> 00:39:20,275 Really? 444 00:40:51,741 --> 00:40:54,535 Welcome to <i>America's Weirdest Home Videos.</i> 445 00:41:21,229 --> 00:41:24,023 - Ricky? - Coming, Dad. 446 00:41:25,400 --> 00:41:29,612 You know I don't like locked doors in my house, boy. 447 00:41:34,409 --> 00:41:36,828 I'm sorry. I must've locked it by accident. 448 00:41:38,955 --> 00:41:40,081 So, what's up? 449 00:41:43,668 --> 00:41:45,920 I need a urine sample. 450 00:41:47,296 --> 00:41:50,508 Wow. It's been six months already. 451 00:41:52,093 --> 00:41:54,262 Can I give it to you in the morning? I just took a whiz. 452 00:41:55,221 --> 00:41:56,764 Yeah, I suppose. 453 00:42:01,102 --> 00:42:02,603 You know... 454 00:42:10,695 --> 00:42:14,073 Well... Good night, Son. 455 00:43:21,015 --> 00:43:23,017 I've been waiting for you. 456 00:43:43,996 --> 00:43:46,165 You've been working out, haven't you? 457 00:43:46,332 --> 00:43:48,042 I could tell. 458 00:43:50,294 --> 00:43:52,380 I was hoping you'd give me a bath. 459 00:43:52,547 --> 00:43:55,508 I'm very, very dirty. 460 00:44:28,958 --> 00:44:30,877 What are you doing? 461 00:44:32,461 --> 00:44:33,796 Nothing. 462 00:44:34,630 --> 00:44:36,424 You were masturbating. 463 00:44:36,591 --> 00:44:38,718 - I was not. - Yes, you were. 464 00:44:40,386 --> 00:44:43,097 All right, so shoot me! I was whacking off. 465 00:44:44,056 --> 00:44:47,602 That's right, I was choking the bishop. Chafing the carrot. 466 00:44:47,768 --> 00:44:50,605 You know, saying hi to my monster. 467 00:44:50,771 --> 00:44:53,691 - That's disgusting! - Excuse me, 468 00:44:53,858 --> 00:44:56,736 but some of us still have blood pumping through our veins! 469 00:44:56,903 --> 00:44:58,613 - So do I! - Really? 470 00:44:58,779 --> 00:45:01,490 I'm the only one who seems to be doing anything about it! 471 00:45:04,160 --> 00:45:06,662 Lester, I refuse to live like this. 472 00:45:06,829 --> 00:45:08,206 This is not a marriage! 473 00:45:08,372 --> 00:45:11,459 This hasn't been a marriage for years. 474 00:45:11,626 --> 00:45:14,170 But you were happy as long as I kept my mouth shut. 475 00:45:14,337 --> 00:45:19,133 Guess what? I've changed. And the new me whacks off when he feels horny, 476 00:45:19,300 --> 00:45:22,094 'cause you're obviously not gonna help me out in that department. 477 00:45:22,261 --> 00:45:24,805 I see. You think you're the only one who's sexually frustrated. 478 00:45:24,972 --> 00:45:28,059 I'm not? Well, then come on, baby, I'm ready! 479 00:45:28,226 --> 00:45:30,186 Don't you mess with me, mister. 480 00:45:30,353 --> 00:45:33,481 I will divorce you so fast it'll make your head spin! 481 00:45:33,648 --> 00:45:35,733 On what grounds? 482 00:45:35,900 --> 00:45:38,486 I'm not a drunk. I don't fuck other women. 483 00:45:38,653 --> 00:45:40,696 I don't mistreat you. I've never hit you. 484 00:45:40,863 --> 00:45:43,658 I don't even try to touch you since you made it abundantly clear 485 00:45:43,824 --> 00:45:45,993 just how unnecessary you consider me to be! 486 00:45:48,329 --> 00:45:51,332 But I did support you when you got your license. 487 00:45:51,499 --> 00:45:55,002 And some people might think that entitles me to half of what's yours. 488 00:45:57,880 --> 00:46:01,676 So turn out the light when you come back to bed, OK? 489 00:46:14,313 --> 00:46:16,023 <i>It's a great thing when you realize</i> 490 00:46:16,190 --> 00:46:19,026 <i>you still have the ability to surprise yourself.</i> 491 00:46:20,736 --> 00:46:24,282 <i>Makes you wonder what else you can do that you've forgotten about.</i> 492 00:46:24,782 --> 00:46:25,783 Hey, guys! 493 00:46:25,950 --> 00:46:29,370 - Lester, I didn't know you ran. - I just started. 494 00:46:29,537 --> 00:46:30,705 Good for you. 495 00:46:30,871 --> 00:46:34,834 I figured you might be able to give me some pointers. I need to shape up. Fast. 496 00:46:35,001 --> 00:46:37,169 Are you looking to just lose weight 497 00:46:37,336 --> 00:46:40,756 or do you want to have increased strength and flexibility as well? 498 00:46:42,216 --> 00:46:44,051 I want to look good naked. 499 00:46:59,692 --> 00:47:00,985 What is this? 500 00:47:01,152 --> 00:47:03,904 Fucking gay pride parade? 501 00:47:04,947 --> 00:47:06,907 Hey, Ricky. 502 00:47:09,660 --> 00:47:14,248 My life is passing before my eyes and those two have barely broken a sweat. 503 00:47:14,415 --> 00:47:17,668 Sorry, hi. Lester Burnham. I live next door. We haven't met. 504 00:47:17,835 --> 00:47:19,670 Colonel Frank Fitts, US Marine Corps. 505 00:47:19,837 --> 00:47:22,256 Oh, well... 506 00:47:23,215 --> 00:47:25,134 Welcome to the neighborhood, sir. 507 00:47:29,180 --> 00:47:30,681 Ricky... 508 00:47:32,350 --> 00:47:36,062 I was thinking about... the movie we talked about. 509 00:47:36,228 --> 00:47:37,688 <i>- Re-Animator.</i> - Yeah. 510 00:47:37,855 --> 00:47:39,982 You want to borrow it? It's up in my room. 511 00:47:40,149 --> 00:47:41,734 - OK. - Come on. 512 00:47:52,870 --> 00:47:54,622 - Can you hold this for a sec? - Sure. 513 00:47:54,789 --> 00:47:57,750 I don't think my dad would come in while someone else is here, 514 00:47:57,917 --> 00:48:00,586 - but you never know. - What is this? 515 00:48:00,753 --> 00:48:02,671 Urine. 516 00:48:02,838 --> 00:48:06,342 I have to take a drug test every six months just to make sure I'm clean. 517 00:48:07,009 --> 00:48:10,096 Are you kidding? You just smoked with me last night. 518 00:48:10,262 --> 00:48:12,306 It's not mine. 519 00:48:12,473 --> 00:48:16,018 One of my clients is a nurse in a pediatrician's office. 520 00:48:16,185 --> 00:48:19,230 I cut her a deal, she keeps me in clean piss. 521 00:48:22,108 --> 00:48:23,776 You like Pink Floyd? 522 00:48:25,444 --> 00:48:27,071 I like a lot of music. 523 00:48:28,989 --> 00:48:31,992 Man, I haven't listened to this album in years. 524 00:48:33,494 --> 00:48:35,162 How much do you want? 525 00:48:35,996 --> 00:48:39,834 I don't know. It's been a while. How much is an ounce? 526 00:48:43,796 --> 00:48:46,549 This is totally decent, and it's 300. 527 00:48:49,677 --> 00:48:52,346 This shit is top-of-the-line. 528 00:48:52,513 --> 00:48:55,850 It's called G-13. It's genetically engineered by the US government. 529 00:48:56,016 --> 00:48:59,895 It's extremely potent, but a completely mellow high. No paranoia. 530 00:49:01,689 --> 00:49:03,899 Is that what we smoked last night? 531 00:49:04,859 --> 00:49:06,652 This is all I ever smoke. 532 00:49:10,614 --> 00:49:14,076 - How much? - Two grand. 533 00:49:14,243 --> 00:49:16,203 Jesus! 534 00:49:16,370 --> 00:49:19,331 Things have changed since 1973. 535 00:49:19,498 --> 00:49:21,876 You don't have to pay now. I know you're good for it. 536 00:49:22,042 --> 00:49:23,043 Thanks. 537 00:49:23,210 --> 00:49:25,463 There's a card in there with my beeper number. 538 00:49:25,629 --> 00:49:27,673 Beep me any time, day or night. 539 00:49:29,800 --> 00:49:31,218 And I only accept cash. 540 00:49:32,219 --> 00:49:34,430 Now I know how you can afford all this equipment. 541 00:49:36,432 --> 00:49:40,060 When I was your age, I flipped burgers all summer just to buy an 8-track. 542 00:49:40,227 --> 00:49:41,729 That sucks. 543 00:49:41,896 --> 00:49:44,315 No. Actually, it was great. 544 00:49:45,941 --> 00:49:48,194 All I did was party and get laid. 545 00:49:50,446 --> 00:49:52,615 I had my whole life ahead of me. 546 00:49:55,534 --> 00:49:58,245 My dad thinks I pay for all this with catering jobs. 547 00:50:00,080 --> 00:50:02,374 Never underestimate the power of denial. 548 00:50:36,492 --> 00:50:38,702 What the hell do you think you're doing? 549 00:50:41,288 --> 00:50:43,958 Mom's mad. Bench presses. 550 00:50:45,084 --> 00:50:48,420 I'm going to whale on my pecs, and then I'm going to do my back. 551 00:50:49,338 --> 00:50:53,634 I see you're smoking pot now. I'm so glad. 552 00:50:53,801 --> 00:50:55,970 I think using illegal psychotropic substances 553 00:50:56,136 --> 00:50:58,764 is a very positive example to set for our daughter. 554 00:50:58,931 --> 00:51:03,060 You're one to talk, you bloodless, money-grubbing freak. 555 00:51:05,437 --> 00:51:08,440 Lester, you have such hostility in you! 556 00:51:08,607 --> 00:51:11,151 Do you mind? I'm trying to work out here. 557 00:51:11,318 --> 00:51:12,778 Unless you want to spot me. 558 00:51:12,945 --> 00:51:18,659 Lester, you will not get away with this! You can be sure of that! 559 00:51:20,494 --> 00:51:23,247 That's... what... 560 00:51:23,414 --> 00:51:25,291 ...you... think. 561 00:51:26,125 --> 00:51:30,337 "My job consists of basically masking my contempt 562 00:51:30,504 --> 00:51:32,923 for the assholes in charge 563 00:51:33,090 --> 00:51:35,342 and, at least once a day, 564 00:51:35,509 --> 00:51:39,013 retiring to the men's room so I can jerk off 565 00:51:39,847 --> 00:51:44,602 while I fantasize about a life that doesn't so closely resemble hell." 566 00:51:45,352 --> 00:51:48,981 Well, you obviously have no interest in saving yourself. 567 00:51:49,148 --> 00:51:53,402 Brad, for 14 years I've been a whore for the advertising industry. 568 00:51:53,569 --> 00:51:56,989 The only way I could save myself now is if I start firebombing. 569 00:51:57,156 --> 00:52:00,367 Whatever. Management wants you gone by the end of the day. 570 00:52:00,534 --> 00:52:04,038 What sort of severance package is management prepared to offer me 571 00:52:04,204 --> 00:52:07,166 considering the information I have about our editorial director 572 00:52:07,333 --> 00:52:11,045 buying pussy with company money? Which I think would interest the IRS, 573 00:52:11,211 --> 00:52:13,380 since it technically constitutes fraud. 574 00:52:13,547 --> 00:52:16,800 I'm sure that some of our advertisers and rival publications 575 00:52:16,967 --> 00:52:20,929 might like to know about it as well. Not to mention... Craig's wife. 576 00:52:23,140 --> 00:52:27,311 - What do you want? - One year's salary with benefits. 577 00:52:27,478 --> 00:52:29,229 That's not going to happen. 578 00:52:30,689 --> 00:52:33,942 What do you say I throw in a little sexual harassment charge to boot? 579 00:52:37,029 --> 00:52:39,740 - Against who? - Against you. 580 00:52:40,574 --> 00:52:43,327 Can you prove that you didn't offer to save my job 581 00:52:43,494 --> 00:52:45,913 if I let you blow me? 582 00:52:50,959 --> 00:52:54,421 Man... You are one twisted fuck. 583 00:52:55,839 --> 00:52:57,257 Nope. 584 00:52:57,424 --> 00:53:00,844 I'm just an ordinary guy with nothing to lose. 585 00:53:06,684 --> 00:53:08,143 Yeah! 586 00:53:14,358 --> 00:53:16,944 - Carolyn. - Buddy. 587 00:53:17,111 --> 00:53:18,946 I am so sorry to have kept you waiting. 588 00:53:21,865 --> 00:53:23,617 Christy left for New York this morning. 589 00:53:23,784 --> 00:53:27,204 Let's just say things were a little hectic around the house. 590 00:53:27,371 --> 00:53:29,081 What's she doing in New York? 591 00:53:29,248 --> 00:53:32,918 She's moving there. Yes. We are splitting up. 592 00:53:33,877 --> 00:53:37,339 - Buddy, I'm so sorry. - Yes. 593 00:53:37,506 --> 00:53:41,427 According to her, I'm too focused on my career. 594 00:53:42,553 --> 00:53:47,558 As if being driven to succeed is some sort of a character flaw. 595 00:53:48,434 --> 00:53:52,813 She certainly did take advantage of the lifestyle my success afforded her. 596 00:53:57,192 --> 00:53:58,902 It's for the best. 597 00:54:01,238 --> 00:54:04,491 When I saw you two at the party the other night, you seemed perfectly happy. 598 00:54:04,658 --> 00:54:06,410 Call me crazy... 599 00:54:07,494 --> 00:54:12,082 ...but it is my philosophy that in order to be successful, 600 00:54:12,249 --> 00:54:16,420 one must project an image of success at all times. 601 00:54:36,482 --> 00:54:38,275 What are you doing? 602 00:54:39,693 --> 00:54:41,361 I was filming this dead bird. 603 00:54:41,528 --> 00:54:42,946 Why? 604 00:54:43,113 --> 00:54:44,865 Because it's beautiful. 605 00:54:47,910 --> 00:54:50,996 I think maybe you forgot your medication today, mental-boy. 606 00:54:53,457 --> 00:54:54,708 Hi, Jane. 607 00:54:55,959 --> 00:54:57,920 Look, I want you to stop filming me. 608 00:55:00,214 --> 00:55:01,715 OK. 609 00:55:01,882 --> 00:55:04,343 Well, whatever. This is boring. 610 00:55:04,510 --> 00:55:06,011 Let's go. 611 00:55:07,304 --> 00:55:10,641 - Do you need a ride? - Are you crazy? 612 00:55:10,808 --> 00:55:13,977 I don't want to end up hacked to pieces in a dumpster somewhere. 613 00:55:14,144 --> 00:55:17,523 It's OK. I'll walk. But thanks. 614 00:55:17,689 --> 00:55:19,942 See? He doesn't want to go anyway. Come on. Let's go. 615 00:55:21,443 --> 00:55:23,445 Come on, Jane. 616 00:55:23,612 --> 00:55:25,030 I think I'm gonna walk, too. 617 00:55:26,365 --> 00:55:30,786 What? Jane, that's, like, almost a mile! 618 00:55:46,760 --> 00:55:49,304 God! I love it! 619 00:55:49,805 --> 00:55:53,141 - You like getting nailed by the king? - Yes, I love it! 620 00:55:53,308 --> 00:55:55,978 Fuck me, Your Majesty! 621 00:55:56,144 --> 00:55:57,479 - Who's the king? - You are! 622 00:55:57,646 --> 00:55:59,064 Who's the king? 623 00:56:15,497 --> 00:56:17,624 <i>American woman</i> 624 00:56:17,791 --> 00:56:20,294 <i>Stay away from me</i> 625 00:56:20,460 --> 00:56:22,629 <i>American woman</i> 626 00:56:22,796 --> 00:56:25,591 <i>Mama let me be</i> 627 00:56:26,967 --> 00:56:29,136 <i>Don't come hanging around my door</i> 628 00:56:29,303 --> 00:56:31,972 <i>I don't wanna see your face no more</i> 629 00:56:32,139 --> 00:56:36,685 <i>I got better things to do Than spend my life growing old with you</i> 630 00:56:36,852 --> 00:56:38,687 <i>Now woman</i> 631 00:56:38,854 --> 00:56:41,481 ♪ <i>I said, "Stay away"</i> 632 00:56:41,648 --> 00:56:45,944 <i>- Smile, you're at Mr. Smiley's.</i> - What? 633 00:56:46,111 --> 00:56:48,447 <i>Would you like to try our new bacon and egg fajita,</i> 634 00:56:48,614 --> 00:56:51,325 <i>just $1.29 for a limited time only?</i> 635 00:56:51,491 --> 00:56:53,368 No, but thank you. 636 00:56:53,535 --> 00:56:57,331 I'd like the Big Barn Burger, Smiley Fries, and an orange soda. 637 00:56:57,497 --> 00:56:59,583 <i>Please drive up to the window. Thank you.</i> 638 00:57:01,835 --> 00:57:04,504 Smile, you're at Mr. Smiley's. That'll be $4.98, please. 639 00:57:07,966 --> 00:57:10,302 - Would you like some Smiley Sauce? - No, no. 640 00:57:10,469 --> 00:57:12,763 Actually, I'd like to fill out an application. 641 00:57:12,930 --> 00:57:15,265 There's no jobs for manager. It's just for counter. 642 00:57:15,432 --> 00:57:16,934 Good. 643 00:57:17,100 --> 00:57:21,271 I'm looking for the least possible amount of responsibility. 644 00:57:24,733 --> 00:57:26,360 I don't think you'd fit in here. 645 00:57:26,526 --> 00:57:29,738 I have fast-food experience. 646 00:57:29,905 --> 00:57:31,949 Yeah, like 20 years ago! 647 00:57:32,115 --> 00:57:36,036 I'm sure there have been amazing technological advances in the industry, 648 00:57:36,203 --> 00:57:38,705 but surely you must have some sort of training program. 649 00:57:38,872 --> 00:57:41,583 It seems unfair to presume I won't be able to learn. 650 00:57:45,921 --> 00:57:48,632 That was exactly what I needed. 651 00:57:52,135 --> 00:57:54,596 The royal treatment, so to speak. 652 00:57:57,599 --> 00:57:59,351 I was so stressed out. 653 00:58:07,526 --> 00:58:10,237 - Know what I do when I feel like that? - What? 654 00:58:12,239 --> 00:58:14,282 I fire a gun. 655 00:58:14,449 --> 00:58:15,617 Really? 656 00:58:15,784 --> 00:58:17,703 Yeah, I go to this little firing range downtown 657 00:58:17,869 --> 00:58:21,039 and I just pop off a few rounds. 658 00:58:22,499 --> 00:58:24,418 I've never fired a gun before. 659 00:58:24,584 --> 00:58:26,253 Well, you've got to try it. 660 00:58:26,420 --> 00:58:28,463 Nothing makes you feel more powerful. 661 00:58:31,425 --> 00:58:35,137 Well, almost nothing. 662 00:58:40,517 --> 00:58:42,602 So, do you like your new house? 663 00:58:42,769 --> 00:58:43,979 I like it. 664 00:58:44,146 --> 00:58:47,357 The people who used to live there fed stray cats, so they were always around, 665 00:58:47,524 --> 00:58:50,444 and it drove my mother nuts. 666 00:58:50,610 --> 00:58:52,738 And then she cut down their tree. 667 00:58:54,448 --> 00:58:57,242 - Is that a funeral? - Yeah. 668 00:58:58,326 --> 00:59:00,829 Have you ever known anybody who died? 669 00:59:00,996 --> 00:59:02,956 No. Have you? 670 00:59:03,123 --> 00:59:04,916 No. 671 00:59:06,126 --> 00:59:08,837 But I did see this homeless woman who froze to death once. 672 00:59:09,004 --> 00:59:12,799 Just lying there on the sidewalk. She looked really sad. 673 00:59:27,022 --> 00:59:29,816 I got that homeless woman on videotape. 674 00:59:29,983 --> 00:59:32,027 Why would you film that? 675 00:59:32,194 --> 00:59:33,945 Because it was amazing. 676 00:59:34,112 --> 00:59:36,073 What's amazing about it? 677 00:59:36,239 --> 00:59:38,241 When you see something like that 678 00:59:38,408 --> 00:59:41,328 it's like God is looking right at you, just for a second. 679 00:59:42,329 --> 00:59:44,956 And if you're careful, you can look right back. 680 00:59:45,123 --> 00:59:46,750 And what do you see? 681 00:59:48,085 --> 00:59:49,669 Beauty. 682 01:00:05,936 --> 01:00:08,522 Mom? I want you to meet somebody. 683 01:00:12,818 --> 01:00:15,695 - Mom? - Yes. 684 01:00:17,989 --> 01:00:21,201 I want you to meet somebody. This is Jane. 685 01:00:22,410 --> 01:00:24,496 - Hi. - Oh, my. 686 01:00:24,663 --> 01:00:27,457 I apologize for the way things look around here. 687 01:00:38,135 --> 01:00:39,970 This is where my dad hides out. 688 01:00:40,887 --> 01:00:43,056 I take it he's got a thing for guns. 689 01:00:44,850 --> 01:00:46,518 You got to see this one thing. 690 01:00:48,937 --> 01:00:51,064 My dad would kill me if he knew I was in here. 691 01:00:52,357 --> 01:00:54,151 Did you steal his keys? 692 01:00:54,317 --> 01:00:57,070 No. One of my clients is a locksmith. 693 01:00:57,237 --> 01:00:59,823 He was short on cash one night, so I let him pay me in trade. 694 01:01:14,546 --> 01:01:15,964 Turn it over. 695 01:01:20,010 --> 01:01:21,678 Oh, my God. 696 01:01:21,845 --> 01:01:24,806 It's, like, official state china of the Third Reich. 697 01:01:24,973 --> 01:01:28,476 There's a whole subculture of people who collect this Nazi shit. 698 01:01:29,519 --> 01:01:31,730 But my dad just has this one thing. 699 01:01:44,409 --> 01:01:47,120 - What's wrong? - Nothing. 700 01:01:48,538 --> 01:01:52,167 - No, you're scared of me. - No, I'm not. 701 01:01:53,627 --> 01:01:56,421 You want to see the most beautiful thing I've ever filmed? 702 01:02:21,112 --> 01:02:23,323 It was one of those days 703 01:02:23,490 --> 01:02:26,326 where it's a minute away from snowing... 704 01:02:28,662 --> 01:02:30,997 ...and there's this electricity in the air. 705 01:02:34,167 --> 01:02:35,710 You can almost hear it. 706 01:02:36,670 --> 01:02:38,171 Right? 707 01:02:42,509 --> 01:02:44,219 And this bag was just... 708 01:02:46,429 --> 01:02:48,598 ...dancing with me. 709 01:02:51,351 --> 01:02:53,770 Like a little kid, begging me to play with it. 710 01:02:56,273 --> 01:02:58,358 For 15 minutes. 711 01:03:02,279 --> 01:03:04,739 That's the day I realized that there was this... 712 01:03:06,533 --> 01:03:09,536 ...entire life behind things... 713 01:03:13,623 --> 01:03:16,543 ...and this incredibly benevolent force 714 01:03:17,627 --> 01:03:20,588 that wanted me to know that there was no reason to be afraid... 715 01:03:23,466 --> 01:03:25,051 ...ever. 716 01:03:27,971 --> 01:03:30,390 Video's a poor excuse, I know. 717 01:03:33,351 --> 01:03:35,186 But it helps me remember. 718 01:03:39,607 --> 01:03:41,192 I need to remember. 719 01:03:48,783 --> 01:03:50,702 Sometimes there is so much... 720 01:03:52,162 --> 01:03:56,082 ...beauty... in the world. 721 01:03:59,044 --> 01:04:00,962 I feel like I can't take it. 722 01:04:05,759 --> 01:04:07,427 And my heart... 723 01:04:08,595 --> 01:04:12,140 ...is just going to cave in. 724 01:04:59,979 --> 01:05:02,232 Oh, my God. What time is it? 725 01:05:10,698 --> 01:05:13,034 - Sorry I'm late. - That's quite all right, dear. 726 01:05:14,077 --> 01:05:16,329 Your father and I were just discussing his day at work. 727 01:05:16,496 --> 01:05:18,498 Why don't you tell our daughter about it, honey? 728 01:05:18,665 --> 01:05:22,585 Janie, today I quit my job. Then I told my boss to go fuck himself 729 01:05:22,752 --> 01:05:25,672 and blackmailed him for almost $60,000. Pass the asparagus. 730 01:05:25,839 --> 01:05:29,092 Your father seems to think this kind of behavior is something to be proud of. 731 01:05:29,259 --> 01:05:32,137 Your mother seems to prefer I go through life like a prisoner 732 01:05:32,303 --> 01:05:34,264 while she keeps my dick in a jar under the sink. 733 01:05:34,431 --> 01:05:36,891 How dare you speak to me that way in front of her? 734 01:05:37,058 --> 01:05:39,519 I marvel that you can be so contemptuous of me 735 01:05:39,686 --> 01:05:42,188 on the same day that you lose your job! 736 01:05:42,355 --> 01:05:45,108 I didn't lose it. It's not like, "Where'd my job go?" I quit! 737 01:05:45,275 --> 01:05:47,610 Someone pass the asparagus, please. 738 01:05:47,777 --> 01:05:50,029 Thank you for putting me under the added pressure 739 01:05:50,196 --> 01:05:52,782 - of being the sole breadwinner now. - I already have a job. 740 01:05:52,949 --> 01:05:55,535 Don't give a second thought as to who's gonna pay the mortgage. 741 01:05:55,702 --> 01:05:57,287 We'll just leave it all to Carolyn! 742 01:05:57,454 --> 01:05:59,372 "You're gonna take care of everything?" 743 01:05:59,539 --> 01:06:00,790 "Yes, I don't mind." 744 01:06:00,957 --> 01:06:04,043 "You mean everything? You don't mind having the sole responsibility? 745 01:06:04,210 --> 01:06:06,129 Your husband feels he can quit his job..." 746 01:06:06,296 --> 01:06:08,381 Will someone pass the fucking asparagus? 747 01:06:08,548 --> 01:06:11,217 - I'm not gonna be a part of this. - Sit down! 748 01:06:31,905 --> 01:06:34,741 I am sick and tired of being treated like I don't exist. 749 01:06:34,908 --> 01:06:37,994 You two do whatever you want to do whenever you want, 750 01:06:38,161 --> 01:06:39,913 and I don't complain. All I want... 751 01:06:40,079 --> 01:06:42,582 You don't complain? Please! Excuse me, excuse me! 752 01:06:42,749 --> 01:06:45,335 I must be psychotic! If you don't complain, what is this? 753 01:06:45,502 --> 01:06:47,921 Yeah, let's bring in the laugh meter 754 01:06:48,087 --> 01:06:50,673 and see how loud it gets on that one! You don't... 755 01:07:00,767 --> 01:07:02,852 Don't interrupt me, honey. 756 01:07:16,991 --> 01:07:18,826 And another thing. 757 01:07:18,993 --> 01:07:21,454 From now on, we're going to alternate our dinner music 758 01:07:21,621 --> 01:07:24,123 because, frankly, and I don't think I'm alone here, 759 01:07:24,290 --> 01:07:26,876 I am really tired of this Lawrence Welk shit. 760 01:07:36,344 --> 01:07:37,887 Go away! 761 01:07:38,054 --> 01:07:40,473 Honey, please let me in. 762 01:07:49,899 --> 01:07:54,737 I wish that you hadn't witnessed that awful scene, but in a way, I'm glad. 763 01:07:54,904 --> 01:07:57,490 Why? So I can see what freaks you and Dad really are? 764 01:07:58,616 --> 01:08:00,118 Me? 765 01:08:03,162 --> 01:08:04,664 Oh, God. 766 01:08:06,082 --> 01:08:07,667 Christ, Mom. 767 01:08:08,626 --> 01:08:10,753 No, I'm glad because... 768 01:08:13,172 --> 01:08:17,135 Because you're old enough now to learn the most important lesson in life: 769 01:08:18,678 --> 01:08:22,640 You cannot count on anyone except yourself. 770 01:08:27,687 --> 01:08:30,023 You cannot count on anyone except yourself. 771 01:08:32,150 --> 01:08:34,235 You know, it's sad but true. 772 01:08:35,194 --> 01:08:37,363 And the sooner you learn it, the better. 773 01:08:38,072 --> 01:08:41,492 Look, Mom, I really don't feel like having a Kodak moment here, OK? 774 01:08:42,619 --> 01:08:44,329 You ungrateful little brat! 775 01:08:45,371 --> 01:08:47,540 Just look at everything you have! 776 01:08:47,707 --> 01:08:50,168 When I was your age, I lived in a duplex! 777 01:08:50,335 --> 01:08:52,211 We didn't even have our own house. 778 01:10:55,251 --> 01:10:56,919 You little bastard! 779 01:10:57,086 --> 01:10:59,839 - No, I just... - How did you get in there? 780 01:11:00,006 --> 01:11:01,799 How? How? 781 01:11:03,885 --> 01:11:06,012 Come on, get up! Come on! 782 01:11:06,179 --> 01:11:07,972 Get up! 783 01:11:08,139 --> 01:11:10,016 Fight back, you little pussy! 784 01:11:10,183 --> 01:11:11,851 No, sir, I won't fight you! 785 01:11:12,018 --> 01:11:15,855 - How?! How did you get in there? - I picked the lock, sir. 786 01:11:16,022 --> 01:11:19,650 What were you looking for? Money? Are you on dope again? 787 01:11:19,817 --> 01:11:22,987 No, sir. I wanted to show my girlfriend your Nazi plate. 788 01:11:24,322 --> 01:11:27,617 - A girlfriend? - Yes, sir. She lives next door. 789 01:11:41,297 --> 01:11:42,632 Her name's Jane. 790 01:12:02,985 --> 01:12:05,279 This is for your own good, boy. 791 01:12:08,199 --> 01:12:13,287 You have no respect for other people's things and for authority. 792 01:12:13,454 --> 01:12:14,747 Yes, sir. I'm sorry. 793 01:12:14,914 --> 01:12:19,043 Can't just go around doing whatever you feel like! 794 01:12:19,210 --> 01:12:23,172 - You can't! There are rules in life. - Yes, sir. 795 01:12:26,425 --> 01:12:29,262 You need structure, yeah. 796 01:12:29,428 --> 01:12:31,681 - You need discipline! - Discipline. Yes, sir. 797 01:12:31,848 --> 01:12:34,934 Thank you for trying to teach me. Don't give up on me, Dad. 798 01:12:40,439 --> 01:12:41,941 Ricky... 799 01:12:47,029 --> 01:12:49,657 You stay out of there! 800 01:13:38,414 --> 01:13:42,168 I gotta say, when you first came here, I thought you would be hopeless. 801 01:13:42,335 --> 01:13:43,544 But you're a natural. 802 01:13:43,711 --> 01:13:47,089 Well, all I know is, I love shooting this gun! 803 01:13:48,966 --> 01:13:52,303 <i>Don't tell me not to fly I've simply got to</i> 804 01:13:52,470 --> 01:13:55,556 <i>If someone takes a spill It's me and not you</i> 805 01:13:55,723 --> 01:13:59,685 <i>Don't bring around the cloud to rain on my parade</i> 806 01:14:02,355 --> 01:14:06,150 ♪ <i>I'm gonna march my band out</i> 807 01:14:06,317 --> 01:14:08,861 <i>I'll beat my drum</i> 808 01:14:09,028 --> 01:14:12,198 <i>And if I'm found out</i> 809 01:14:12,365 --> 01:14:15,284 <i>Your turn at bat, sir</i> 810 01:14:15,451 --> 01:14:18,037 <i>At least I didn't fake it Hat, sir</i> 811 01:14:18,204 --> 01:14:20,039 <i>So what? I didn't make it</i> 812 01:14:20,206 --> 01:14:24,543 <i>Nobody</i> 813 01:14:24,710 --> 01:14:28,965 <i>I said nobody</i> 814 01:14:30,341 --> 01:14:32,885 <i>Nobody</i> 815 01:14:33,052 --> 01:14:37,598 <i>Had better rain on</i> 816 01:14:37,765 --> 01:14:42,853 <i>My parade</i> 817 01:15:00,371 --> 01:15:01,914 What? 818 01:15:02,081 --> 01:15:04,792 Whose car is that out front? 819 01:15:04,959 --> 01:15:07,753 Mine. 1970 Pontiac Firebird, 820 01:15:07,920 --> 01:15:10,423 the car I've always wanted, and now I have it. 821 01:15:10,589 --> 01:15:13,050 - I rule. - Where's the Camry? 822 01:15:13,217 --> 01:15:15,261 I traded it in. 823 01:15:15,428 --> 01:15:17,638 Shouldn't you have consulted me first? 824 01:15:18,389 --> 01:15:19,765 Let me think. 825 01:15:19,932 --> 01:15:21,976 No. You never drove it. 826 01:15:24,061 --> 01:15:26,772 Have you done something different? You look great. 827 01:15:32,111 --> 01:15:33,821 Where's Jane? 828 01:15:34,447 --> 01:15:36,282 Jane not home. 829 01:15:42,788 --> 01:15:44,540 We have... 830 01:15:47,460 --> 01:15:49,545 ...the whole house... 831 01:15:50,546 --> 01:15:52,631 ...to ourselves. 832 01:15:55,301 --> 01:15:57,094 Christ, Carolyn. 833 01:15:58,137 --> 01:15:59,805 When did you become so... 834 01:16:02,224 --> 01:16:04,018 ...joyless? 835 01:16:05,352 --> 01:16:07,855 Joyless? 836 01:16:08,022 --> 01:16:09,690 I am not joyless. 837 01:16:10,900 --> 01:16:12,985 There happens to be a lot about me 838 01:16:13,152 --> 01:16:16,113 that you don't know, Mr. Smarty Man. 839 01:16:17,323 --> 01:16:20,159 There is plenty of joy in my life. 840 01:16:23,079 --> 01:16:24,955 Whatever happened to that girl... 841 01:16:28,584 --> 01:16:32,880 ...who used to fake seizures at frat parties when she got bored? 842 01:16:34,548 --> 01:16:39,345 Who used to run up to the roof of our first apartment building 843 01:16:39,512 --> 01:16:42,181 to flash the traffic helicopters? 844 01:16:43,808 --> 01:16:46,310 Have you totally forgotten about her? 845 01:16:46,477 --> 01:16:48,896 Because I haven't. 846 01:17:02,118 --> 01:17:04,662 Lester, you're gonna spill beer on the couch. 847 01:17:12,753 --> 01:17:14,338 So what? It's just a couch. 848 01:17:16,715 --> 01:17:21,387 This is a $4,000 sofa upholstered in Italian silk! 849 01:17:21,554 --> 01:17:23,055 This is not just a couch! 850 01:17:23,222 --> 01:17:26,892 It's just a couch! 851 01:17:27,059 --> 01:17:29,228 This isn't life! 852 01:17:29,395 --> 01:17:31,397 This is just stuff. 853 01:17:31,564 --> 01:17:36,110 And it's become more important to you than living. Honey, that's just nuts. 854 01:17:45,578 --> 01:17:47,997 I'm only trying to help you! 855 01:17:54,086 --> 01:17:56,130 <i>Don't.</i> 856 01:17:56,297 --> 01:17:57,631 Why? 857 01:18:01,093 --> 01:18:05,931 <i>It's weird watching myself. I don't like how I look.</i> 858 01:18:08,851 --> 01:18:11,520 Can't believe you don't know how beautiful you are. 859 01:18:11,687 --> 01:18:14,773 Look, I'm not gonna sit here for that shit. 860 01:18:25,451 --> 01:18:27,703 How does it feel now? 861 01:18:27,870 --> 01:18:30,956 - Fine. - You don't feel naked? 862 01:18:32,541 --> 01:18:34,084 <i>I am naked.</i> 863 01:18:34,251 --> 01:18:36,420 You know what I mean. 864 01:18:46,055 --> 01:18:48,474 So tell me about being in the hospital. 865 01:18:52,436 --> 01:18:56,148 <i>When I was 15, my dad caught me smoking dope.</i> 866 01:18:56,315 --> 01:18:59,735 <i>He totally freaked and decided to send me to military school.</i> 867 01:19:01,695 --> 01:19:05,032 <i>I told you his thing about structure and discipline, right?</i> 868 01:19:05,199 --> 01:19:08,327 <i>Well, of course, I got kicked out.</i> 869 01:19:09,578 --> 01:19:11,247 Dad and I had this huge fight. 870 01:19:11,413 --> 01:19:13,749 He hit me. 871 01:19:13,916 --> 01:19:18,504 And the next day at school, some kid made a crack about my haircut. 872 01:19:20,464 --> 01:19:22,216 And I just snapped. 873 01:19:26,303 --> 01:19:28,097 I wanted to kill him. 874 01:19:29,807 --> 01:19:31,934 I would've killed him... 875 01:19:34,228 --> 01:19:36,146 ...if they hadn't pulled me off. 876 01:19:39,858 --> 01:19:43,320 That's when my dad put me in the hospital. 877 01:19:43,487 --> 01:19:46,865 They drugged me up and left me in there for two years. 878 01:19:51,662 --> 01:19:53,455 You must really hate him. 879 01:19:57,459 --> 01:19:59,503 He's not a bad man. 880 01:19:59,670 --> 01:20:03,465 You'd better believe I'd hate my dad if he did something like that to me. 881 01:20:05,384 --> 01:20:07,720 Wait. I already do hate my dad. 882 01:20:10,264 --> 01:20:11,265 Why? 883 01:20:14,560 --> 01:20:16,228 He's a total asshole. 884 01:20:16,395 --> 01:20:20,316 He's got this crush on my friend Angela, and it's disgusting. 885 01:20:20,482 --> 01:20:22,693 You'd rather he had the crush on you. 886 01:20:24,236 --> 01:20:26,196 Gross. No. 887 01:20:29,908 --> 01:20:33,245 But it'd be nice if I was anywhere near as important to him as she is. 888 01:20:37,541 --> 01:20:40,961 I know you think my dad's harmless, but you're wrong. 889 01:20:42,588 --> 01:20:45,591 He's doing massive psychological damage to me. 890 01:20:46,759 --> 01:20:48,135 How? 891 01:20:48,302 --> 01:20:51,680 Well, now, I, too, need structure. 892 01:20:51,847 --> 01:20:53,807 A little fucking discipline. 893 01:21:05,361 --> 01:21:07,029 I'm serious, though. 894 01:21:08,238 --> 01:21:10,407 How could he not be damaging me? 895 01:21:13,118 --> 01:21:15,788 I need a father who's a role model. 896 01:21:15,954 --> 01:21:18,290 Not some horny geek-boy who's gonna spray his shorts 897 01:21:18,457 --> 01:21:21,126 whenever I bring a girlfriend home from school. 898 01:21:23,462 --> 01:21:25,130 What a lame-o. 899 01:21:28,258 --> 01:21:31,261 Someone really should just put him out of his misery. 900 01:21:35,015 --> 01:21:36,809 Want me to kill him for you? 901 01:21:46,151 --> 01:21:48,278 Yeah. Would you? 902 01:21:50,322 --> 01:21:51,949 It'll cost you. 903 01:21:52,116 --> 01:21:54,493 I've been babysitting since I was about ten. 904 01:21:54,660 --> 01:21:57,454 I've got almost $3,000. 905 01:22:00,833 --> 01:22:02,668 Course, I was saving it up for a boob job. 906 01:22:04,586 --> 01:22:06,630 But... 907 01:22:20,018 --> 01:22:22,521 You know, that's not a very nice thing to do. 908 01:22:25,858 --> 01:22:27,818 Hiring someone to kill your dad. 909 01:22:31,113 --> 01:22:33,866 <i>I guess I'm not a very nice girl, then, am I?</i> 910 01:22:58,390 --> 01:23:00,726 You know I'm not serious, right? 911 01:23:01,894 --> 01:23:03,687 Of course. 912 01:23:18,660 --> 01:23:20,996 You know how lucky we are to have found each other? 913 01:23:27,461 --> 01:23:29,129 <i>Remember those posters that said:</i> 914 01:23:29,296 --> 01:23:32,549 <i>"Today is the first day of the rest of your life"?</i> 915 01:23:35,052 --> 01:23:37,471 <i>Well, that's true of every day except one:</i> 916 01:23:38,764 --> 01:23:40,390 <i>The day you die.</i> 917 01:24:19,888 --> 01:24:21,598 Jane, hurry up. 918 01:24:21,765 --> 01:24:24,226 I've got a very important appointment. 919 01:24:24,393 --> 01:24:27,020 Mom, is it OK if Angela sleeps over tonight? 920 01:24:27,187 --> 01:24:29,314 Well, of course. She's always welcome. 921 01:24:29,481 --> 01:24:33,277 I thought you two had a fight. I haven't seen her around here in a while. 922 01:24:40,784 --> 01:24:43,495 - What? - I've been too embarrassed 923 01:24:43,662 --> 01:24:45,998 to bring her over. 924 01:24:46,164 --> 01:24:48,834 Because of you and that way you behave. 925 01:24:49,001 --> 01:24:51,670 What are you talking about? I've barely even spoken to her. 926 01:24:51,837 --> 01:24:55,090 You stare at her all the time! Like you're drunk! 927 01:24:55,257 --> 01:24:57,175 - It's disgusting! - Watch yourself, Jane, 928 01:24:57,342 --> 01:25:00,554 or you're gonna turn into a real bitch, just like your mother! 929 01:25:05,183 --> 01:25:06,351 Fuck. 930 01:25:14,359 --> 01:25:15,944 You ready to go? 931 01:25:17,613 --> 01:25:20,949 I don't need a ride. I'm going in with Jane and her mom. 932 01:25:29,041 --> 01:25:30,542 Oh, morning. 933 01:25:31,793 --> 01:25:35,422 - Hey, Ricky. How's it going? - Pretty decent, Mr. Burnham. 934 01:25:35,589 --> 01:25:37,007 Hey, hey. 935 01:26:56,461 --> 01:26:59,214 I need that Super Smiley with cheese ASAP! 936 01:26:59,381 --> 01:27:01,633 You need more than that, my little hombre. 937 01:27:01,800 --> 01:27:05,095 <i>- Yeah. What's good here? - Nothing!</i> 938 01:27:05,262 --> 01:27:08,348 <i>Then I guess we'll just have to be bad, won't we?</i> 939 01:27:09,558 --> 01:27:11,810 <i>I'll have a Double Smiley sandwich,</i> 940 01:27:11,977 --> 01:27:14,271 <i>- curly fries and a vanilla shake. - Make that two!</i> 941 01:27:14,438 --> 01:27:17,357 <i>That'll be $7.98. Please drive up to the window. Thank you.</i> 942 01:27:18,483 --> 01:27:22,821 I think we deserve a little junk food after the workout we had this morning. 943 01:27:24,614 --> 01:27:27,159 - Did you know that? - Thank you. I'm flattered. 944 01:27:28,660 --> 01:27:30,954 Smile! You're at Mister Smiley's! 945 01:27:33,457 --> 01:27:35,917 Would you like to try our new beef and cheese pot pie on a stick? 946 01:27:36,084 --> 01:27:38,295 Just $1 .99 for a limited time only? 947 01:27:38,462 --> 01:27:40,839 We were just at a seminar. 948 01:27:41,006 --> 01:27:43,341 - Buddy, this is my... - Her husband. 949 01:27:43,508 --> 01:27:45,260 We've met before, 950 01:27:45,427 --> 01:27:49,389 but something tells me you're going to remember me this time. 951 01:27:51,391 --> 01:27:53,518 You are so busted. 952 01:27:53,685 --> 01:27:55,645 This really doesn't concern you! 953 01:27:55,812 --> 01:28:00,442 Actually, Janine is senior drive-thru manager, so you kind of are on her turf. 954 01:28:04,863 --> 01:28:07,199 So, this makes sense. 955 01:28:07,365 --> 01:28:09,826 - Oh, Lester... - Honey, it's OK. 956 01:28:09,993 --> 01:28:11,953 I want you to be happy. 957 01:28:12,120 --> 01:28:15,165 - Would you like Smiley sauce with that? - Lester, just stop it! 958 01:28:15,332 --> 01:28:17,209 No, no. You... 959 01:28:18,043 --> 01:28:21,004 ...don't get to tell me what to do... 960 01:28:21,171 --> 01:28:23,256 ...ever... again. 961 01:28:37,521 --> 01:28:39,189 I'm sorry. 962 01:28:41,066 --> 01:28:43,276 I guess we should cool it for a while. 963 01:28:46,196 --> 01:28:48,990 I'm facing a potentially very expensive divorce. 964 01:28:49,157 --> 01:28:51,910 No. I understand completely. 965 01:28:54,830 --> 01:28:56,206 In order to be successful, 966 01:28:56,373 --> 01:28:59,042 one must project an image of success at all times. 967 01:29:25,944 --> 01:29:27,904 Stop it. Stop it. 968 01:30:09,321 --> 01:30:10,322 Shit. 969 01:30:17,329 --> 01:30:19,414 I have to run next door. 970 01:30:19,581 --> 01:30:22,667 Jane left her geometry book in my bag. She needs it to do her homework. 971 01:30:33,261 --> 01:30:37,599 You and psycho-boy are fucking on a regular basis now, right? 972 01:30:37,766 --> 01:30:41,019 - No. - Come on, you can tell me. 973 01:30:41,186 --> 01:30:42,187 Does he have a big dick? 974 01:30:42,354 --> 01:30:46,733 I'm not going to talk about his dick with you, OK? It's not like that. 975 01:30:46,900 --> 01:30:49,444 Not like what? Doesn't he have one? 976 01:30:50,362 --> 01:30:52,197 Why don't you want to talk about it? 977 01:30:52,364 --> 01:30:54,866 I tell you every single detail about every guy that I fuck. 978 01:30:55,033 --> 01:30:58,078 Yeah, and maybe you shouldn't, all right? 979 01:30:58,244 --> 01:31:00,497 Maybe I really don't want to hear about all that. 980 01:31:00,664 --> 01:31:04,000 So now that you have a boyfriend, you're above it? 981 01:31:05,377 --> 01:31:07,212 We got to get you a real man. 982 01:31:28,817 --> 01:31:30,402 - You got any papers? - Yeah. 983 01:31:30,568 --> 01:31:32,404 In the cigar box right over there. 984 01:31:32,570 --> 01:31:34,990 Put up a fight, dude. You are such a pushover. 985 01:31:35,156 --> 01:31:36,908 "No, I can't, really, no. OK." 986 01:31:37,075 --> 01:31:39,411 You should learn to roll a joint. 987 01:32:44,017 --> 01:32:46,102 - Hi. - Where's Mom? 988 01:32:47,270 --> 01:32:49,481 - Don't know. - Hi, Mr. Burnham. 989 01:32:50,482 --> 01:32:53,318 - Hi. - Wow. Look at you. 990 01:32:54,402 --> 01:32:56,821 - Have you been working out? - Some. 991 01:33:02,118 --> 01:33:03,953 You can really tell. 992 01:33:06,998 --> 01:33:08,666 Look at those arms. 993 01:33:13,171 --> 01:33:15,340 You like muscles? 994 01:33:17,425 --> 01:33:20,762 I should probably go see what Jane's up to. 995 01:33:33,233 --> 01:33:35,151 Where did you get that? 996 01:33:37,362 --> 01:33:38,780 From my job. 997 01:33:38,947 --> 01:33:40,907 You don't lie to me. 998 01:33:43,034 --> 01:33:44,577 Now, I saw you with him. 999 01:33:46,412 --> 01:33:48,373 You were watching me? 1000 01:33:50,041 --> 01:33:51,835 What did he make you do? 1001 01:33:55,130 --> 01:33:57,173 Dad, you don't really think me and Mr. Burnham... 1002 01:33:57,340 --> 01:33:59,217 Don't you laugh at me! 1003 01:34:00,760 --> 01:34:05,390 Now, I will not sit back and watch my only son become a cocksucker! 1004 01:34:05,557 --> 01:34:06,933 Jesus! What is it with you? 1005 01:34:11,813 --> 01:34:15,358 I swear to God I'll throw you out of this house and never look at you again! 1006 01:34:15,525 --> 01:34:19,487 - You mean that. - You're damn straight I do! 1007 01:34:19,654 --> 01:34:23,074 I'd rather you were dead than be a fucking faggot! 1008 01:34:34,919 --> 01:34:36,337 You're right. 1009 01:34:40,466 --> 01:34:43,219 - I suck dick for money. - Boy, don't start! 1010 01:34:43,386 --> 01:34:45,889 $2,000. I'm that good. 1011 01:34:46,055 --> 01:34:47,182 Get out! 1012 01:34:47,348 --> 01:34:49,517 And you should see me fuck! 1013 01:34:49,684 --> 01:34:51,728 I'm the best piece of ass in three states! 1014 01:34:51,895 --> 01:34:55,607 Damn it, get out! I don't ever want to see you again! 1015 01:35:01,738 --> 01:35:05,408 What a sad old man you are. 1016 01:35:07,285 --> 01:35:09,495 Get out. 1017 01:35:34,729 --> 01:35:36,189 Mom... 1018 01:35:37,690 --> 01:35:40,235 - I'm leaving. - OK. 1019 01:35:43,655 --> 01:35:45,240 Wear a raincoat. 1020 01:35:52,622 --> 01:35:55,208 I wish things would have been better for you. 1021 01:35:59,671 --> 01:36:01,256 Take care of Dad. 1022 01:36:33,204 --> 01:36:35,707 <i>...disinvesting problems of power</i> 1023 01:36:35,873 --> 01:36:38,710 <i>and removing their ability to make us afraid.</i> 1024 01:36:38,876 --> 01:36:42,088 <i>This is the secret to "Me-Centered Living."</i> 1025 01:36:42,255 --> 01:36:47,218 <i>Only by taking full responsibility for your actions and their solutions</i> 1026 01:36:47,385 --> 01:36:51,472 <i>will you ever break free from the constant cycle of victim hood.</i> 1027 01:36:51,639 --> 01:36:56,811 <i>You are only a victim if you choose to be a victim. We all have the power...</i> 1028 01:36:56,978 --> 01:37:01,524 I don't think we can be friends anymore. You're way too uptight about sex. 1029 01:37:01,691 --> 01:37:05,028 Just don't fuck my dad, all right? 1030 01:37:05,194 --> 01:37:07,113 - Please? - Why not? 1031 01:37:08,614 --> 01:37:11,659 - Dad, leave us alone! - It's me. 1032 01:37:13,578 --> 01:37:15,663 If I had to leave tonight, would you come with me? 1033 01:37:15,830 --> 01:37:18,416 - What? - If I had to go to New York to live, 1034 01:37:18,583 --> 01:37:20,251 tonight, would you come with me? 1035 01:37:22,712 --> 01:37:25,882 - Yes. - You guys can't be serious! 1036 01:37:26,049 --> 01:37:28,426 You're just a kid, and he's, like, a mental case. 1037 01:37:28,593 --> 01:37:30,845 You'll end up living in a box on the street. 1038 01:37:31,012 --> 01:37:34,766 I'm no more a kid than you are! We can use my plastic surgery money. 1039 01:37:34,932 --> 01:37:37,560 We won't have to. I have over $40,000. 1040 01:37:37,727 --> 01:37:39,604 I know people in the city that can help us. 1041 01:37:39,771 --> 01:37:42,023 - What, other drug dealers? - Yes. 1042 01:37:42,190 --> 01:37:44,442 Jane, you'd be out of your mind to go with him. 1043 01:37:44,609 --> 01:37:47,403 - Why do you even care? - Because you're my friend! 1044 01:37:47,570 --> 01:37:51,366 She's not your friend. She's someone you use to feel better about yourself. 1045 01:37:51,532 --> 01:37:54,786 - Go fuck yourself, psycho! - Shut up, bitch! 1046 01:37:54,952 --> 01:37:57,830 - Jane! He's a freak! - Well, then so am I! 1047 01:37:57,997 --> 01:38:01,459 And we'll always be freaks, and we'll never be like other people. 1048 01:38:01,626 --> 01:38:05,296 And you'll never be a freak 'cause you're just too perfect! 1049 01:38:06,005 --> 01:38:09,675 Yeah, well, at least I'm not ugly. 1050 01:38:11,969 --> 01:38:13,679 Yes, you are. 1051 01:38:13,846 --> 01:38:17,183 And you're boring. And you're totally ordinary. 1052 01:38:18,518 --> 01:38:20,228 And you know it. 1053 01:38:22,397 --> 01:38:24,565 You two deserve each other. 1054 01:39:25,418 --> 01:39:27,211 Jesus, man, you're soaked! 1055 01:39:38,389 --> 01:39:40,725 You want me to get Ricky? He's in Jane's room. 1056 01:39:43,394 --> 01:39:45,271 Are you OK? 1057 01:39:45,438 --> 01:39:47,565 Where's your wife? 1058 01:39:49,442 --> 01:39:51,319 I don't know. 1059 01:39:51,486 --> 01:39:54,489 Probably out fucking that dorky prince-of-real-estate asshole. 1060 01:39:56,699 --> 01:39:58,201 And you know what? 1061 01:39:59,911 --> 01:40:01,204 I don't care. 1062 01:40:11,797 --> 01:40:15,927 Your wife is with another man and you don't care? 1063 01:40:19,096 --> 01:40:20,431 Nope. 1064 01:40:20,598 --> 01:40:23,267 Our marriage is just for show. 1065 01:40:24,435 --> 01:40:27,480 A commercial for how normal we are 1066 01:40:27,647 --> 01:40:29,607 when we're anything but. 1067 01:40:37,490 --> 01:40:39,450 Jesus, man, you are shaking. 1068 01:40:40,117 --> 01:40:42,954 We really ought to get you out of these clothes. 1069 01:40:43,120 --> 01:40:44,622 Yeah. 1070 01:40:46,541 --> 01:40:48,292 It's OK. 1071 01:40:52,046 --> 01:40:53,798 I am... 1072 01:40:55,633 --> 01:40:57,802 You just tell me what you need. 1073 01:41:02,056 --> 01:41:03,766 It's OK. 1074 01:41:25,329 --> 01:41:26,956 I'm sorry. 1075 01:41:28,040 --> 01:41:30,042 You got the wrong idea. 1076 01:42:07,288 --> 01:42:09,749 <i>"I refuse to be a victim."</i> 1077 01:42:09,915 --> 01:42:13,836 <i>When this becomes your mantra, constantly reinforcing your...</i> 1078 01:42:17,923 --> 01:42:21,093 I refuse to be a victim! 1079 01:43:05,179 --> 01:43:07,682 I hope you don't mind if I play the stereo. 1080 01:43:07,848 --> 01:43:09,684 Not at all. 1081 01:43:11,477 --> 01:43:13,479 Bad night? 1082 01:43:13,646 --> 01:43:14,980 Not really bad. Just... 1083 01:43:16,482 --> 01:43:18,442 ...strange. 1084 01:43:18,609 --> 01:43:22,780 Believe me, it couldn't possibly be any stranger than mine. 1085 01:43:31,706 --> 01:43:33,290 Jane and I had a fight. 1086 01:43:35,292 --> 01:43:36,627 It was about you. 1087 01:43:39,463 --> 01:43:41,006 She's mad at me because... 1088 01:43:42,800 --> 01:43:44,635 ...I said I think you're sexy. 1089 01:43:47,847 --> 01:43:51,350 - Do you want a sip? - Sure. 1090 01:44:20,421 --> 01:44:21,881 So... 1091 01:44:24,300 --> 01:44:26,218 ...are you going to tell me? 1092 01:44:29,638 --> 01:44:31,515 What do you want? 1093 01:44:35,102 --> 01:44:36,687 I don't know. 1094 01:44:38,939 --> 01:44:40,191 You... 1095 01:44:40,816 --> 01:44:42,318 ...don't know. 1096 01:44:43,527 --> 01:44:45,780 What do you want? 1097 01:44:47,198 --> 01:44:48,324 Are you kidding? 1098 01:44:50,284 --> 01:44:52,036 I want you. 1099 01:44:56,332 --> 01:44:59,251 I've wanted you since the first moment I saw you. 1100 01:45:02,338 --> 01:45:05,299 You are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. 1101 01:45:13,557 --> 01:45:15,559 You don't think I'm ordinary? 1102 01:45:18,729 --> 01:45:21,440 You couldn't be ordinary if you tried. 1103 01:45:24,735 --> 01:45:26,654 Thank you. 1104 01:45:27,863 --> 01:45:30,783 I don't think there's anything worse than being ordinary. 1105 01:45:50,803 --> 01:45:53,806 I refuse to be a victim. I refuse to be a victim. 1106 01:45:53,973 --> 01:45:55,891 I refuse to be a victim. 1107 01:45:56,058 --> 01:46:00,145 Lester... I have something I have to say to you. 1108 01:46:50,863 --> 01:46:52,364 Are you scared? 1109 01:46:53,490 --> 01:46:55,326 I don't get scared. 1110 01:46:58,495 --> 01:47:00,331 My parents will try to find me. 1111 01:47:01,165 --> 01:47:02,875 Mine won't. 1112 01:47:24,355 --> 01:47:26,357 This is my first time. 1113 01:47:30,152 --> 01:47:31,946 You're kidding. 1114 01:47:32,112 --> 01:47:33,864 I'm sorry. 1115 01:47:34,823 --> 01:47:36,367 I still want to do it. 1116 01:47:36,533 --> 01:47:38,035 I just... 1117 01:47:38,202 --> 01:47:42,998 ...thought I should tell you, in case you wondered why I wasn't... 1118 01:47:44,792 --> 01:47:46,377 ...better. 1119 01:47:58,639 --> 01:48:00,224 What's wrong? 1120 01:48:06,981 --> 01:48:09,024 I thought you said I was beautiful. 1121 01:48:10,943 --> 01:48:12,820 You are beautiful. 1122 01:48:15,698 --> 01:48:17,408 You are so... 1123 01:48:18,200 --> 01:48:19,702 ...beautiful. 1124 01:48:22,538 --> 01:48:24,415 And I would be a very... 1125 01:48:25,791 --> 01:48:26,917 ...lucky man. 1126 01:48:28,335 --> 01:48:30,587 I feel so stupid. 1127 01:48:30,754 --> 01:48:32,589 Don't. 1128 01:48:34,758 --> 01:48:36,593 I'm sorry. 1129 01:48:36,760 --> 01:48:39,263 You have nothing to be sorry about. 1130 01:48:40,931 --> 01:48:42,599 It's OK. 1131 01:48:43,892 --> 01:48:46,103 Everything's OK. 1132 01:49:02,119 --> 01:49:04,621 Wow. I was starving. 1133 01:49:05,956 --> 01:49:09,460 - Do you want me to make another one? - No, I'm fine. 1134 01:49:09,626 --> 01:49:10,836 You sure? 1135 01:49:12,087 --> 01:49:15,549 I'm still a little weirded out, but I feel better. 1136 01:49:15,716 --> 01:49:17,092 Thanks. 1137 01:49:20,596 --> 01:49:21,847 How's Jane? 1138 01:49:23,182 --> 01:49:24,266 What do you mean? 1139 01:49:25,809 --> 01:49:26,977 I mean... 1140 01:49:28,270 --> 01:49:30,564 ...how's her life? 1141 01:49:30,731 --> 01:49:32,357 Is she happy? 1142 01:49:32,524 --> 01:49:34,651 Is she miserable? 1143 01:49:36,361 --> 01:49:40,449 I'd really like to know, and she'd die before she'd ever tell me about it. 1144 01:49:43,744 --> 01:49:48,332 She's... she is really happy. 1145 01:49:49,833 --> 01:49:51,335 She thinks she's in love. 1146 01:50:03,889 --> 01:50:05,849 Good for her. 1147 01:50:09,686 --> 01:50:10,854 How are you? 1148 01:50:18,821 --> 01:50:21,615 It's been a long time since anybody asked me that. 1149 01:50:28,705 --> 01:50:30,124 I'm great. 1150 01:50:37,214 --> 01:50:38,590 I've got to go to the bathroom. 1151 01:50:52,938 --> 01:50:54,606 I'm great. 1152 01:51:29,433 --> 01:51:31,059 Man, oh, man. 1153 01:51:34,438 --> 01:51:37,149 Man, oh, man, oh, man. 1154 01:52:13,560 --> 01:52:15,020 Oh, my God! 1155 01:53:00,774 --> 01:53:04,069 <i>I had always heard your entire life flashes in front of your eyes</i> 1156 01:53:04,236 --> 01:53:06,238 <i>the second before you die.</i> 1157 01:53:07,781 --> 01:53:08,991 <i>First of all...</i> 1158 01:53:09,157 --> 01:53:12,536 <i>...that one second isn't a second at all.</i> 1159 01:53:13,287 --> 01:53:17,791 <i>It stretches on forever, like an ocean of time.</i> 1160 01:53:20,210 --> 01:53:24,423 <i>For me, it was lying on my back at Boy Scout camp</i> 1161 01:53:24,589 --> 01:53:26,883 <i>watching falling stars.</i> 1162 01:53:35,559 --> 01:53:40,647 <i>And yellow leaves from the maple trees that lined our street.</i> 1163 01:53:50,115 --> 01:53:55,037 <i>Or my grandmother's hands and the way her skin seemed like paper.</i> 1164 01:54:02,919 --> 01:54:06,757 <i>And the first time I saw my cousin Tony's</i> 1165 01:54:06,923 --> 01:54:09,760 <i>brand-new Firebird.</i> 1166 01:54:21,563 --> 01:54:22,939 <i>And Janie.</i> 1167 01:54:25,067 --> 01:54:26,902 <i>And Janie.</i> 1168 01:54:58,975 --> 01:55:01,103 <i>And Carolyn.</i> 1169 01:55:06,316 --> 01:55:09,945 <i>I guess I could be pretty pissed off about what happened to me,</i> 1170 01:55:10,112 --> 01:55:14,408 <i>but it's hard to stay mad when there's so much beauty in the world.</i> 1171 01:55:15,742 --> 01:55:20,038 <i>Sometimes I feel like I'm seeing it all at once, and it's too much.</i> 1172 01:55:20,997 --> 01:55:24,376 <i>My heart fills up like a balloon that's about to burst.</i> 1173 01:55:26,253 --> 01:55:29,339 <i>And then I remember to relax</i> 1174 01:55:30,424 --> 01:55:33,093 <i>and stop trying to hold on to it.</i> 1175 01:55:33,260 --> 01:55:36,179 <i>And then it flows through me like rain</i> 1176 01:55:37,347 --> 01:55:40,183 <i>and I can't feel anything but gratitude</i> 1177 01:55:40,350 --> 01:55:45,730 <i>for every single moment of my stupid little life.</i> 1178 01:55:47,190 --> 01:55:49,860 <i>You have no idea what I'm talking about, I'm sure.</i> 1179 01:55:51,361 --> 01:55:52,529 <i>But don't worry.</i> 1180 01:55:53,864 --> 01:55:55,740 <i>You will someday.</i> 1180 01:55:56,305 --> 01:56:56,694 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org