Sesso in testa

1 00:00:06,600 --> 00:00:08,140 The right hand. 2 00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:10,770 The 'French Horn.' 3 00:00:11,400 --> 00:00:14,230 It is often used ... 4 00:00:14,650 --> 00:00:16,400 ... by scoundrels. 5 00:00:19,510 --> 00:00:22,500 When calling for a beer. 6 00:00:22,570 --> 00:00:24,700 When calling for a beer in English ... 7 00:00:24,850 --> 00:00:26,640 ... it is used in combination ... 8 00:00:26,740 --> 00:00:31,800 ... with vulgar words referring to the special parts of an ox or bull. 9 00:00:31,800 --> 00:00:35,220 Form a funnel with both hands, blow on the base, and ... 10 00:00:35,220 --> 00:00:38,190 ... the sound comes out. 11 00:00:40,160 --> 00:00:41,600 The 'Vernacchio' ... 12 00:00:42,520 --> 00:00:44,210 ... or direct sound, ... 13 00:00:44,700 --> 00:00:48,510 ... is produced by the vibration of the tongue on the lips. 14 00:00:50,460 --> 00:00:52,120 It is used when ... 15 00:00:52,570 --> 00:00:54,910 ... someone doesn't want to give the finger. 16 00:00:55,010 --> 00:00:58,240 And this is often the mark of a coward. 17 00:00:59,100 --> 00:01:00,960 The 'Vernacchia', ... 18 00:01:01,830 --> 00:01:03,270 ... or delicate one, ... 19 00:01:04,350 --> 00:01:05,940 ... it is used when ... 20 00:01:06,530 --> 00:01:10,500 ... you've developed a tension headache from staying out very late pressing wine ... 21 00:01:10,810 --> 00:01:12,090 ... seriously. 22 00:01:12,190 --> 00:01:13,510 And finally, ... 23 00:01:13,610 --> 00:01:15,020 ... 'Just Look at the Hour.' 24 00:01:16,960 --> 00:01:20,320 We need an exceptional circumstance for it. 25 00:01:20,320 --> 00:01:23,380 Such as the presence of an Archbishop ... 26 00:01:23,380 --> 00:01:25,510 ... who has sent you a love letter. 27 00:01:27,030 --> 00:01:29,220 It is made with the hands only ... 28 00:01:30,300 --> 00:01:32,500 ... so no one knows who did it. 29 00:01:34,000 --> 00:01:40,074 Watch Online Movies and Series for FREE www.osdb.link/lm 30 00:02:48,610 --> 00:02:52,460 SEX IN THE HEAD [aka ITALIAN SEX] 31 00:04:50,700 --> 00:04:53,090 The candidate for degree, Diana Tornessi. 32 00:04:53,960 --> 00:04:55,550 Let her in, Conigliero. 33 00:05:02,910 --> 00:05:04,820 Please, Miss Tornessi. 34 00:05:18,090 --> 00:05:20,470 Ladies and gentlemen, we all know the subject of this thesis. 35 00:05:22,920 --> 00:05:25,580 - Go ahead... - In order to earn my degree in sociology, ... 36 00:05:25,600 --> 00:05:26,880 ... I chose as my subject ... 37 00:05:26,880 --> 00:05:29,950 ... the way Italian men treat prostitutes ... 38 00:05:29,950 --> 00:05:32,000 ... and prostitution in our major cities. 39 00:05:32,150 --> 00:05:33,830 In order to study this subject, ... 40 00:05:33,830 --> 00:05:36,830 ... I lived as a prostitute for several weeks. 41 00:05:39,520 --> 00:05:42,600 As you can see, my thesis is divided into the following chapters: 42 00:05:42,600 --> 00:05:45,050 Getting started in prostitution. 43 00:05:45,640 --> 00:05:48,040 Solicitation on the street and coitus in the car. 44 00:05:48,040 --> 00:05:51,140 Solicitation and coitus in small hotels. 45 00:05:51,140 --> 00:05:54,370 Solicitation in newspapers, working in a whore house, ... 46 00:05:54,440 --> 00:05:56,000 ... and from my own home. 47 00:05:57,440 --> 00:05:59,430 So I worked as a hooker, ... 48 00:05:59,430 --> 00:06:00,390 ... as a prostitute, ... 49 00:06:00,390 --> 00:06:01,540 ... and a call girl. 50 00:06:02,790 --> 00:06:04,680 I discovered many interesting things. 51 00:06:05,260 --> 00:06:08,650 Different clients had different tastes ... 52 00:06:08,650 --> 00:06:12,100 ... and different requests depending on where they had coitus. 53 00:06:14,820 --> 00:06:18,120 "My first client was a forty year old man. 54 00:06:19,780 --> 00:06:23,910 "He was wearing a suit, had a nice car and asked me to get in with him. 55 00:06:24,520 --> 00:06:26,310 "I told him: 'Five thousand'. 56 00:06:28,360 --> 00:06:29,410 "Five thousand with..." 57 00:06:31,210 --> 00:06:34,350 "He gave me salacious look and I got into the car. 58 00:06:34,350 --> 00:06:36,200 "He took me to a deserted place, 59 00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:38,790 "... parked the car and lit a cigarette. 60 00:06:38,790 --> 00:06:40,750 "I wasn't worried. 61 00:06:40,750 --> 00:06:42,570 "But he was nervous. 62 00:06:43,440 --> 00:06:45,190 "So nervous that... 63 00:06:46,220 --> 00:06:47,850 "... he ate a cheese sandwich." 64 00:06:49,390 --> 00:06:50,620 That's what she wrote. 65 00:06:52,810 --> 00:06:56,240 "He looked at me, took his penis out, ... 66 00:06:56,240 --> 00:06:58,030 ... and it was flacid." 67 00:06:59,340 --> 00:07:00,940 That's on page three, Father. 68 00:07:02,890 --> 00:07:03,920 A point. 69 00:07:08,200 --> 00:07:09,540 Excuse me Miss, ... 70 00:07:10,220 --> 00:07:13,390 ... you meant penis as in a cock, right? 71 00:07:13,390 --> 00:07:15,940 Because... as I'm from Puglia... 72 00:07:16,660 --> 00:07:18,890 I may have misunderstood the word... 73 00:07:19,950 --> 00:07:21,360 "I took off my panties, ... 74 00:07:22,190 --> 00:07:23,310 "... and got in the back of the car. 75 00:07:24,430 --> 00:07:26,340 "Meanwhile he was arousing himself. 76 00:07:27,280 --> 00:07:28,970 "When he was ready, he penetrated me. 77 00:07:31,220 --> 00:07:32,110 "He penetrated me. 78 00:07:34,510 --> 00:07:36,300 "In two or three minutes he was finished. 79 00:07:38,900 --> 00:07:39,730 "He paid me, .... 80 00:07:45,140 --> 00:07:48,150 "He paid me and took me back home. 81 00:07:48,150 --> 00:07:49,520 "I was pleased. 82 00:07:49,520 --> 00:07:53,590 "My idea was quite simple... 83 00:07:53,590 --> 00:07:57,390 "I would conduct the research, and produce a fully documented thesis." 84 00:07:58,160 --> 00:08:00,650 Silence! Silence! No comments! 85 00:08:08,690 --> 00:08:10,170 I beg your pardon Miss, but... 86 00:08:10,170 --> 00:08:11,760 ... did you really ... 87 00:08:13,080 --> 00:08:15,220 ... let's say... you touched him with your own hands ... 88 00:08:16,570 --> 00:08:21,270 I mean, you personally carried out these experiments. 89 00:08:21,270 --> 00:08:23,410 Tell us about the thesis, please. 90 00:08:23,410 --> 00:08:26,360 I worked three months and had 200 sexual encounters. 91 00:08:26,860 --> 00:08:28,340 Two hundred men? 92 00:08:28,340 --> 00:08:31,000 No, sometimes they were the same men. 93 00:08:31,000 --> 00:08:32,060 What do you mean? 94 00:08:32,060 --> 00:08:36,280 I mean that I actually had 150 different men. 95 00:08:36,280 --> 00:08:37,530 Some of them were previous clients. 96 00:08:37,590 --> 00:08:39,820 Nevertheless, you had 200 sexual encounters! 97 00:08:40,220 --> 00:08:42,270 There may have been more. 98 00:08:42,270 --> 00:08:43,930 Let's not quibble about details. 99 00:08:43,930 --> 00:08:48,050 During my free time I had to study and work on my thesis. 100 00:08:50,390 --> 00:08:52,400 She was studying... please go on. 101 00:08:52,890 --> 00:08:55,480 This was my first outing as a prostitute. 102 00:08:55,480 --> 00:08:58,230 Swinging my handbag, I fit right in. 103 00:09:07,970 --> 00:09:08,860 Excuse me ladies, 104 00:09:08,860 --> 00:09:10,240 I'm doing interviews for the radio. 105 00:09:10,240 --> 00:09:12,350 Would you agree to join a labor union? 106 00:09:12,350 --> 00:09:15,930 We're not in Copenhagen! We work for ourselves! 107 00:09:15,930 --> 00:09:16,700 Thank you. 108 00:09:16,700 --> 00:09:17,630 What do you think about it? 109 00:09:17,630 --> 00:09:20,660 I think that we should. 110 00:09:21,340 --> 00:09:27,800 The prostitute needs protection today. 111 00:09:28,350 --> 00:09:31,940 That doesn't mean I want a pimp. 112 00:09:31,940 --> 00:09:33,380 Do you need a pimp? 113 00:09:34,070 --> 00:09:35,890 - What did you say? - A pimp. 114 00:09:36,210 --> 00:09:37,210 Thank you. 115 00:09:37,600 --> 00:09:39,620 What problems do you think prostitutes face? 116 00:09:39,620 --> 00:09:41,210 No comment. 117 00:09:41,630 --> 00:09:42,430 And you? 118 00:09:42,750 --> 00:09:46,200 Do you think you're on Teulada Road? Get lost! 119 00:09:47,010 --> 00:09:50,880 Excuse me. If you joined a labor union, could you retire? 120 00:09:50,970 --> 00:09:54,370 I already earn enough money renting out hotel rooms. 121 00:09:54,370 --> 00:09:56,770 He's asking if you'll retire when you're old. 122 00:09:56,770 --> 00:10:01,250 I've been working 30 years now! Don't bother me! 123 00:10:01,250 --> 00:10:04,100 Especially tonight, since there are no clients! 124 00:10:04,100 --> 00:10:05,380 You're right! Why is he bothering us? 125 00:10:05,810 --> 00:10:08,170 - Redeem yourself brother! - I have no time. Thanks. 126 00:10:08,230 --> 00:10:10,890 Redeem yourself sister! Redeem yourself sister! 127 00:10:10,890 --> 00:10:12,000 Sister?! You're a eunuch! 128 00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:13,830 Redeem yourself sister! 129 00:10:14,690 --> 00:10:17,980 Redeem yourself sister! 130 00:10:26,970 --> 00:10:28,480 Five thousand. 131 00:10:28,660 --> 00:10:30,980 They ask you how much, but they can't pay you. 132 00:10:30,980 --> 00:10:33,290 That's typical of our men. 133 00:10:33,290 --> 00:10:35,300 They look at each other and leave, ... 134 00:10:35,300 --> 00:10:37,600 ... going into the bushes to look at you. 135 00:10:38,210 --> 00:10:40,900 Redeem yourself sister! Redeem yourself sister! 136 00:10:55,690 --> 00:10:56,640 Come on girls! 137 00:10:58,060 --> 00:10:59,110 Quick! Quick! 138 00:11:01,420 --> 00:11:02,700 Take them all! 139 00:11:05,900 --> 00:11:08,830 Get these whores into the van! 140 00:11:10,540 --> 00:11:13,000 I wasn't looking for a client! I know my rights! 141 00:11:13,000 --> 00:11:15,080 I'll tell you the rights! Now move! 142 00:11:18,060 --> 00:11:20,270 In the van, quick! 143 00:11:38,670 --> 00:11:39,730 You know, Mister President... 144 00:11:39,730 --> 00:11:40,330 Yes, dear. 145 00:11:40,530 --> 00:11:45,010 Sometimes it's not easy to find a man. Not all of you like prostitutes. 146 00:11:45,010 --> 00:11:46,990 That's right, not all of us like... 147 00:11:46,990 --> 00:11:51,830 If that happens, the prostitute is the one who chases the man. 148 00:11:51,830 --> 00:11:56,790 How? What do you do it? 149 00:11:56,790 --> 00:12:00,140 She makes him think it's an adventure. 150 00:12:01,490 --> 00:12:03,930 Women know more than the Devil himself! 151 00:12:06,660 --> 00:12:10,300 Women will always win against the Devil. 152 00:12:11,700 --> 00:12:14,290 During my study, I met many prostitutes. 153 00:12:14,290 --> 00:12:18,000 One day, just to satisfy my curiosity, one of them ... 154 00:12:18,000 --> 00:12:20,690 ... invited me to see how she chased men. 155 00:12:33,370 --> 00:12:34,420 Here she comes! 156 00:12:35,700 --> 00:12:39,410 - It's always the same! - She climbs these steps a lot! 157 00:12:50,190 --> 00:12:51,400 Your package, Miss! 158 00:12:52,020 --> 00:12:53,550 You dropped your package! 159 00:12:53,950 --> 00:12:57,620 - Merci beaucoup! - You are welcome! 160 00:13:00,610 --> 00:13:05,110 If you don't mind, I'll help you. 161 00:13:05,110 --> 00:13:07,990 You are very kind! 162 00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:09,660 Vous ete français! 163 00:13:09,660 --> 00:13:11,470 Oui! Parigenne! 164 00:13:11,970 --> 00:13:13,650 May I accompany you? 165 00:13:13,750 --> 00:13:15,350 Merci! 166 00:13:17,530 --> 00:13:21,430 She's good! 167 00:13:28,240 --> 00:13:29,680 Vive la France! 168 00:14:15,740 --> 00:14:18,080 What's the name of that monument? 169 00:14:18,980 --> 00:14:21,910 It's called The Italian Culo [ass]! 170 00:14:22,820 --> 00:14:23,970 What's a Culo? 171 00:14:23,970 --> 00:14:27,800 You don't know? Why did you come to Italy? 172 00:14:30,690 --> 00:14:33,510 Miss, allow me to sum up. You wrote that ... 173 00:14:33,510 --> 00:14:39,170 ... most of these clients were between 40 and 45 years of age. 174 00:14:39,170 --> 00:14:41,280 Yes, young men are quite rare. 175 00:14:41,280 --> 00:14:43,590 Luckily, young people are saved! 176 00:14:43,590 --> 00:14:45,990 Father, we don't care about young people! 177 00:14:45,990 --> 00:14:50,310 I mean... the crisis is between 40 and 45 years of age. 178 00:14:50,310 --> 00:14:52,870 Miss, what about 40 year old men? 179 00:14:52,870 --> 00:14:56,390 I acquired the clients of the girl who had lived in the flat into which I moved. 180 00:14:56,390 --> 00:14:58,570 I gave her enough money to leave. 181 00:14:58,570 --> 00:15:00,740 - This is how it is done. - Is it? 182 00:15:01,060 --> 00:15:04,200 Let's go back to talk about 40 years old men. 183 00:15:04,200 --> 00:15:05,610 Yes, let's return to that... 184 00:15:05,610 --> 00:15:09,000 Usually they've come to Rome on business. 185 00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:13,570 Yes, I know. They usually come from Turin, Milan... 186 00:15:15,020 --> 00:15:20,260 Some are dealers, some business men. 187 00:15:21,930 --> 00:15:24,200 One of my more interesting cases was ... 188 00:15:27,200 --> 00:15:29,300 Look what happened to me! 189 00:15:29,800 --> 00:15:32,140 Look what happened to me! 190 00:15:32,240 --> 00:15:35,080 Nice! Elegant! 191 00:15:36,240 --> 00:15:37,550 Functional! 192 00:15:38,890 --> 00:15:40,650 There's even a toilet! 193 00:15:40,940 --> 00:15:42,350 Luxury! 194 00:15:42,990 --> 00:15:45,230 This cost you a lot, uh? 195 00:15:45,230 --> 00:15:50,350 Well, if you want to be successful, you have to invest in the best. 196 00:15:51,730 --> 00:15:53,410 Look what happened to me! 197 00:15:54,570 --> 00:15:57,800 Trust your friends! He was my friend! 198 00:15:59,250 --> 00:16:01,650 That son of a bitch! 199 00:16:01,650 --> 00:16:05,940 I have to meet with that bastard! He's going to pay! 200 00:16:05,940 --> 00:16:12,180 He'll pay! Did he forget we grew up together? 201 00:16:12,180 --> 00:16:15,920 When we were kids, we were poor. 202 00:16:15,920 --> 00:16:19,300 He was even poorer than me! 203 00:16:20,050 --> 00:16:23,350 Who helped him become a member of parliament? 204 00:16:24,550 --> 00:16:32,020 He asked for my vote! My mother's, my father's, my sister's! 205 00:16:32,020 --> 00:16:36,530 My stupid wife's and her friends', who are even more stupid than her! 206 00:16:36,530 --> 00:16:40,180 Did I do it for myself? I didn't do it for myself! 207 00:16:40,180 --> 00:16:44,820 That's because I'm an industrialist, even if I live in a small village! 208 00:16:44,820 --> 00:16:51,570 I own a factory! I don't need them! They need me! 209 00:16:52,120 --> 00:16:55,540 Member of Parliament! I made him a big shot! 210 00:16:55,540 --> 00:16:57,430 He made promises. 211 00:16:57,430 --> 00:17:01,400 He told me... he told me: Epifanio... Open your legs. 212 00:17:01,400 --> 00:17:05,370 He told me: When there's an election, give me your vote ... 213 00:17:05,370 --> 00:17:08,410 .. and ask other people to vote for me. I'll make you rich! 214 00:17:08,410 --> 00:17:15,380 Your village trusts you. I'll make sure you win the contract for the toilets. 215 00:17:15,380 --> 00:17:19,830 An open-ended contract, for all the barracks. 216 00:17:19,830 --> 00:17:24,570 They are a lot of them! Epifanio, you'll make the army go to the toilet! 217 00:17:25,950 --> 00:17:30,870 He made me wait 4 hours this morning! Do you understand? 218 00:17:30,930 --> 00:17:39,470 Then, when I had become angry enough, he sent his secretary to see me ... 219 00:17:39,550 --> 00:17:41,590 ... who told me he couldn't meet with me. 220 00:17:41,590 --> 00:17:44,600 That's because he had to go to Montecitorio .... 221 00:17:44,600 --> 00:17:51,070 ... where he had a meeting about a commercial matter. 222 00:17:51,070 --> 00:17:55,540 A matter... fuck his matters! 223 00:17:57,760 --> 00:18:00,630 I don't matter? Am I not important too? 224 00:18:00,960 --> 00:18:05,710 When I get back to my village, what will I tell my friends? 225 00:18:05,790 --> 00:18:09,410 What will I tell the Mayor? That our Member of Parliament wouldn't see me? 226 00:18:09,410 --> 00:18:12,670 What if they spit on me? 227 00:18:12,670 --> 00:18:15,010 And what if they blame me for what I've done? 228 00:18:15,010 --> 00:18:17,500 I have to meet him! 229 00:18:17,500 --> 00:18:21,250 I brought everything. Everything I needed. 230 00:18:21,250 --> 00:18:23,460 Look here! I have a sample. 231 00:18:23,460 --> 00:18:25,730 A sample of the product from the factory. 232 00:18:25,730 --> 00:18:29,120 Look at this! A urinal! 233 00:18:29,120 --> 00:18:32,740 Everything was ready! All we need is a model, and we'll build a monument. 234 00:18:32,740 --> 00:18:36,320 A marble monument with the title: Hero's Urine! 235 00:18:36,320 --> 00:18:39,140 We do have to be discrete about how we portray the hero! 236 00:18:39,140 --> 00:18:42,530 But the hero is a man! And a man has to piss! 237 00:18:42,530 --> 00:18:44,800 Do you understand, this is important! 238 00:18:52,710 --> 00:18:54,760 Look what happened to me! 239 00:18:54,760 --> 00:18:57,030 Someone like me, who has no problem spending money. 240 00:18:57,210 --> 00:18:59,090 Here's your tip! 241 00:19:01,090 --> 00:19:02,690 I enjoyed it... 242 00:19:02,890 --> 00:19:05,890 If I find him! If I find him... 243 00:19:07,690 --> 00:19:10,820 Excuse me, I don't remember. Did I fuck you or not? 244 00:19:10,920 --> 00:19:14,420 Because I'm so confused! 245 00:19:22,400 --> 00:19:24,170 What a strange guy, uh? 246 00:19:24,170 --> 00:19:26,040 - Insane! Insane! - Yes... 247 00:19:26,340 --> 00:19:27,880 ... like macaroni! 248 00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:31,590 Let's say he's a man with problems in politics. 249 00:19:34,410 --> 00:19:35,720 Conigliero! 250 00:19:35,720 --> 00:19:36,870 I'm still here! 251 00:19:36,870 --> 00:19:40,270 Conigliero, make them shut up before I get angry! 252 00:19:40,270 --> 00:19:45,090 Damn you! You really want me to lose my job, don't you? 253 00:19:46,670 --> 00:19:47,980 Who is that man? 254 00:19:47,980 --> 00:19:49,770 What a wonderful man! 255 00:19:50,610 --> 00:19:55,020 These are my empirical observations: 256 00:19:55,520 --> 00:19:58,780 The average penis length in Italy is 6 inches, ... 257 00:19:59,020 --> 00:20:00,980 ... and 4 inches in circumference. 258 00:20:02,350 --> 00:20:06,610 - The shortest penis I've seen was 2.5 inches long. - Poor man... 259 00:20:06,920 --> 00:20:08,880 The biggest was 10 inches long. 260 00:20:10,330 --> 00:20:12,860 The penis is bigger in Italy nowadays, uh? 261 00:20:14,090 --> 00:20:16,480 I was talking about something else... 262 00:20:16,880 --> 00:20:19,990 We always learn something new at the university, uh? 263 00:20:22,320 --> 00:20:28,000 Miss, tell me, how could you be sure of the length of a client's penis? 264 00:20:28,100 --> 00:20:29,230 I measured them. 265 00:20:35,430 --> 00:20:37,700 Excuse me! I don't see the point in any of this! 266 00:20:38,000 --> 00:20:39,820 What don't you understand?! I haven't understood anything either! 267 00:20:39,820 --> 00:20:41,910 Conigliero! I don't need to hear from these idiots! Make them shut up! 268 00:20:41,910 --> 00:20:43,410 Shut up! 269 00:20:43,910 --> 00:20:45,100 - Bravo! - Thank you! 270 00:20:45,200 --> 00:20:48,150 Please, Miss, continue with your report. Don't worry about them. 271 00:20:48,150 --> 00:20:53,070 What else about your Italian clients caught your attention? 272 00:20:53,070 --> 00:20:56,440 Well, there's one thing in particular. 273 00:20:56,440 --> 00:21:02,550 It's about the taboos that most Italian men share. 274 00:21:02,550 --> 00:21:03,860 Sexual taboos. 275 00:21:03,860 --> 00:21:06,500 The pleasure of profaning all things sacred. 276 00:21:06,500 --> 00:21:08,860 The pleasure of the outrage caused by the sacrilege. 277 00:21:09,140 --> 00:21:11,760 You have something to tell us about it, isn't it? 278 00:21:11,770 --> 00:21:14,210 Yes. It's about a nun. 279 00:21:14,560 --> 00:21:18,090 - I object! - Don't start complaining, Father. 280 00:21:18,090 --> 00:21:20,820 - Isn't a nun is one of God's creatures too? - That's not true! 281 00:21:20,920 --> 00:21:24,270 Oh come on Father! Sometimes a nun is just a beautiful woman! 282 00:21:24,370 --> 00:21:28,310 If this girl insists on going on like this, ... 283 00:21:28,310 --> 00:21:29,460 ... I'll leave the classroom! 284 00:21:29,540 --> 00:21:31,320 Now that this is becoming interesting? 285 00:21:31,320 --> 00:21:33,970 It's 1974, try to be more open minded! 286 00:21:34,070 --> 00:21:35,640 It's impossible to be any more open minded than this, Mister President! 287 00:21:35,640 --> 00:21:39,770 If you want to condemn the girl, do it later. I need to continue. 288 00:21:39,770 --> 00:21:44,120 You're making this classroom like a... like a... 289 00:21:44,120 --> 00:21:46,940 With your blessing Father, with your blessing. 290 00:21:46,940 --> 00:21:49,170 Can we go on? Do you agree? 291 00:21:49,830 --> 00:21:50,850 Please... 292 00:21:58,030 --> 00:22:00,400 Damn, we're too late! 293 00:22:00,670 --> 00:22:02,550 When will we get in there? 294 00:22:02,550 --> 00:22:03,930 Look how many cars are ahead of us! 295 00:22:03,930 --> 00:22:05,440 It's an endless line! 296 00:22:05,440 --> 00:22:08,030 I counted them: There are 10 ahead of us! 297 00:22:08,030 --> 00:22:09,790 I don't care if I have to wait. 298 00:22:09,790 --> 00:22:12,210 It's the first time I'll get to fuck a nun, and I don't want to miss it! 299 00:22:13,530 --> 00:22:15,070 Relax, I'm ahead of you! 300 00:22:15,070 --> 00:22:18,040 There's another car load of men! Wow! 301 00:22:22,270 --> 00:22:23,840 It's my turn, it's my turn! 302 00:22:23,840 --> 00:22:25,820 - Go, go! - I want to try it too! 303 00:22:25,820 --> 00:22:27,320 It was great! 304 00:22:39,970 --> 00:22:41,250 Good evening, sister. 305 00:22:43,420 --> 00:22:45,110 Who are you? 306 00:22:46,270 --> 00:22:48,320 Haven't I met you somewhere? 307 00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:50,330 I don't know... maybe in Church? 308 00:22:51,100 --> 00:22:52,990 In Church. 309 00:22:54,310 --> 00:22:56,790 Oh come on! Maybe in some brothel? 310 00:22:59,220 --> 00:23:02,770 Come on, boy! There are a lot of people waiting outside! 311 00:23:06,980 --> 00:23:08,190 Enough! 312 00:23:09,170 --> 00:23:15,430 Listen to me! I want this wicked girl ... 313 00:23:15,430 --> 00:23:18,560 ... to tell me where this thing happened! 314 00:23:18,560 --> 00:23:21,700 The name and the surname of that nun! 315 00:23:21,700 --> 00:23:24,330 And the religious ordination she belonged to! 316 00:23:24,330 --> 00:23:28,600 I will denounce her as well, in case she is reluctant to tell! 317 00:23:29,240 --> 00:23:31,750 Father, you haven't understood. 318 00:23:32,580 --> 00:23:34,210 I understood quite well. 319 00:23:34,210 --> 00:23:35,010 The name! 320 00:23:35,010 --> 00:23:37,130 - Mister President, - Yes, dear. 321 00:23:37,130 --> 00:23:39,080 That woman wasn't a real nun. 322 00:23:39,080 --> 00:23:40,870 She was a prostitute. 323 00:23:41,190 --> 00:23:42,660 That's good to know. 324 00:23:42,660 --> 00:23:44,590 A very good one. 325 00:23:45,610 --> 00:23:47,880 She studied the issue,... 326 00:23:47,880 --> 00:23:50,910 ... and learned that Italian men love to profane sacred things. 327 00:23:51,460 --> 00:23:53,610 Do you know how much she earned in three months? 328 00:23:53,610 --> 00:23:54,380 How much? 329 00:23:54,380 --> 00:23:55,240 12 million! 330 00:23:56,070 --> 00:23:58,190 She wanted to take advantage of Italian men's weakness, 331 00:23:58,190 --> 00:24:00,040 and she was successful for three months. 332 00:24:00,040 --> 00:24:02,280 Then she was arrested. 333 00:24:02,280 --> 00:24:04,070 And she become a cloistered nun. 334 00:24:04,200 --> 00:24:06,270 All the newspapers talked about it. 335 00:24:07,500 --> 00:24:09,600 You can go on, Miss. 336 00:24:10,760 --> 00:24:13,770 The act of desecration takes on many forms. 337 00:24:13,770 --> 00:24:15,020 Did you experience desecration? 338 00:24:15,020 --> 00:24:17,070 I have some personal knowledge of it. 339 00:24:17,070 --> 00:24:19,650 Please, desecrate, desecrate! That's why we're here! 340 00:24:21,750 --> 00:24:23,140 I'm coming! 341 00:24:25,040 --> 00:24:26,790 I'm coming! 342 00:24:31,920 --> 00:24:33,290 Are you Lanfranco Ceccarelli? 343 00:24:33,290 --> 00:24:35,050 I'm Lanfranco Ceccarelli! Come on in! 344 00:24:36,300 --> 00:24:37,810 You're so beautiful! 345 00:24:37,810 --> 00:24:40,590 Sister Olga told me, but I couldn't imagine you'd be like this! 346 00:24:40,590 --> 00:24:42,130 - Let's go upstairs! - Yes. 347 00:24:42,130 --> 00:24:44,970 You're so fine! Did you find the house easily? 348 00:24:44,970 --> 00:24:48,180 - Yes. - I want to show you what I'll do to you! 349 00:24:48,180 --> 00:24:51,020 Let's go upstairs! I prepared everything. I'm ready! 350 00:24:51,790 --> 00:24:54,450 Come in. I've never had someone as beautiful as you are! 351 00:24:54,450 --> 00:24:57,710 Let me look at you! You're perfect! Beautiful! 352 00:24:57,710 --> 00:25:00,080 Tell me, why are you a prostitute? 353 00:25:03,860 --> 00:25:05,360 You are not offended, are you? 354 00:25:05,360 --> 00:25:07,510 I said prostitute without thinking. 355 00:25:07,510 --> 00:25:10,160 Don't be upset with me, come on! 356 00:25:10,550 --> 00:25:12,590 Don't worry, I'm used to it. 357 00:25:12,590 --> 00:25:13,490 That's what I am. 358 00:25:13,490 --> 00:25:15,150 You are kind, too! 359 00:25:15,860 --> 00:25:17,750 Let's do a striptease to music! 360 00:25:17,750 --> 00:25:18,480 Okay. 361 00:25:25,590 --> 00:25:27,500 Why don't you get undressed? 362 00:25:28,120 --> 00:25:30,160 You're in a hurry, eh? 363 00:25:30,160 --> 00:25:32,530 I understand that. 364 00:25:32,530 --> 00:25:34,470 But I'm a very clean guy. 365 00:25:34,470 --> 00:25:38,360 I'm going to take a shower now, and wash my toy! 366 00:25:39,160 --> 00:25:40,980 I'll go and wash everything. Then I'll be right back! 367 00:25:40,980 --> 00:25:42,440 Let me find you all naked! 368 00:25:43,480 --> 00:25:45,520 Be quick! I don't want to waste time! 369 00:26:07,670 --> 00:26:10,750 Listen! Lanfranco? 370 00:26:10,750 --> 00:26:12,950 What is it, dear? 371 00:26:12,950 --> 00:26:15,070 Do you have anything to drink? 372 00:26:15,070 --> 00:26:18,520 I have everything! 373 00:26:18,520 --> 00:26:21,180 Look in the kitchen, in the fridge. 374 00:26:21,180 --> 00:26:22,650 Can I go in there? 375 00:26:22,650 --> 00:26:24,890 Of course! Help yourself! 376 00:26:38,070 --> 00:26:39,320 What's wrong with you? 377 00:26:39,320 --> 00:26:42,170 There... there's a corpse there! 378 00:26:43,550 --> 00:26:45,250 Haven't you ever seen a corpse? 379 00:26:45,250 --> 00:26:47,170 Yes, but she's in there! 380 00:26:47,170 --> 00:26:49,980 She's dead among the flowers and candles! 381 00:26:49,980 --> 00:26:53,470 How silly! All corpses are laid out with flowers and candles! 382 00:26:53,470 --> 00:26:56,420 It's custom. If I knew you'd be so shocked, ... 383 00:26:56,420 --> 00:26:58,010 ... I'd have closed the door! 384 00:26:58,010 --> 00:26:59,840 - I'm so sorry. - Who is she? 385 00:26:59,840 --> 00:27:00,990 - That woman? - Yes. 386 00:27:00,990 --> 00:27:02,180 It's my wife. 387 00:27:02,180 --> 00:27:04,480 She died yesterday, poor woman. 388 00:27:04,480 --> 00:27:06,020 - Your wife? - Yes. 389 00:27:06,020 --> 00:27:09,540 You wanted to make love with your wife's corpse in the house? 390 00:27:09,540 --> 00:27:11,170 So? What's wrong with it? 391 00:27:11,170 --> 00:27:13,720 Who dies sleeps, and who remains behind lives! 392 00:27:14,020 --> 00:27:16,190 Or so the poets say! 393 00:27:16,670 --> 00:27:18,980 You are crazy! Help me! 394 00:27:18,980 --> 00:27:21,470 Come here! Don't spoil everything! 395 00:27:21,470 --> 00:27:23,750 You're crazy! With your wife's corpse... 396 00:27:23,750 --> 00:27:26,210 I understand! You think I killed her! 397 00:27:26,210 --> 00:27:31,550 You know what happened? She ate too much pasta ... 398 00:27:31,550 --> 00:27:34,950 ... and died of indigestion. I told her, don't eat so much! 399 00:27:34,950 --> 00:27:38,400 She told me, I don't care, I don't care! See what happened? 400 00:27:38,400 --> 00:27:40,350 I couldn't even kill a fly! 401 00:27:41,120 --> 00:27:43,680 You know what people call me? Lanfranco the clean. 402 00:27:43,680 --> 00:27:45,290 Because I'm the only clean one here. 403 00:27:45,290 --> 00:27:49,030 Come here! Don't worry about the corpse! 404 00:27:49,030 --> 00:27:50,920 If I don't care about her, why should you? 405 00:27:51,940 --> 00:27:54,850 Oh God! A corpse! Help me! 406 00:27:54,850 --> 00:27:56,200 Help me! 407 00:27:59,110 --> 00:28:01,310 Bitch! 408 00:28:06,520 --> 00:28:09,380 Even in death you ruin my life, eh? 409 00:28:09,380 --> 00:28:11,520 Go to hell twice! 410 00:28:17,340 --> 00:28:19,020 - Conigliero! - Yes! I'm here! 411 00:28:19,020 --> 00:28:21,320 Conigliero, would we get our guests some armchairs ... 412 00:28:21,320 --> 00:28:23,620 ... so that they can sit at our table? 413 00:28:23,620 --> 00:28:25,470 Thank you! That's very nice of you! 414 00:28:25,470 --> 00:28:28,300 This is a classroom! We're conducting an oral exam here! 415 00:28:28,300 --> 00:28:29,480 Fuck! 416 00:28:29,480 --> 00:28:30,730 I apologize, my lady. 417 00:28:30,730 --> 00:28:32,970 Stand back! Stand back! 418 00:28:32,970 --> 00:28:35,560 No smoking in here! 419 00:28:35,560 --> 00:28:36,870 Here! No smoking! 420 00:28:41,530 --> 00:28:46,630 Sometimes a prostitute can help a family man, too. 421 00:28:47,790 --> 00:28:49,030 That's a good thing. 422 00:28:49,420 --> 00:28:51,900 One day I was called to go to a secretarial school. 423 00:29:00,680 --> 00:29:05,130 What a nice ass! What a pretty woman! 424 00:29:10,100 --> 00:29:12,590 Open up, and show me your breasts! 425 00:29:12,590 --> 00:29:14,580 Turn around. 426 00:29:14,580 --> 00:29:18,150 How beautiful. Please walk. 427 00:29:23,060 --> 00:29:27,690 You're too ugly! Go away! 428 00:29:30,130 --> 00:29:35,180 This is nice. You're a cute one! 429 00:29:37,780 --> 00:29:38,760 Nice legs! 430 00:29:46,800 --> 00:29:52,350 You again! Go away! I need beautiful women! Go away! 431 00:29:53,300 --> 00:29:55,520 Oh yes, the case of the... of the... 432 00:29:55,520 --> 00:29:57,510 The homosexual man. 433 00:29:57,810 --> 00:29:59,050 Ah... the homosexual man. 434 00:29:59,250 --> 00:30:01,590 That's what Mister Rossi thought. 435 00:30:02,290 --> 00:30:03,610 Was he...? 436 00:30:03,610 --> 00:30:05,370 Not him, his son, Father. 437 00:30:05,370 --> 00:30:06,840 Father and son? 438 00:30:06,840 --> 00:30:10,200 No, the son was gay. Father, can we go on? 439 00:30:10,200 --> 00:30:11,540 Please go on. 440 00:30:11,540 --> 00:30:15,930 The father was desperate because his son wasn't attracted to women. 441 00:30:15,930 --> 00:30:17,680 That's how it seemed. 442 00:30:18,650 --> 00:30:20,790 Come, come Miss! Come! 443 00:30:21,140 --> 00:30:25,660 See? I employ only special secretaries. 444 00:30:25,660 --> 00:30:29,910 But that's not enough. I need a serious professional like you. 445 00:30:29,910 --> 00:30:32,220 My son Carletto is 23 years old, ... 446 00:30:32,220 --> 00:30:36,010 ... and all the boys his age have already had hundreds of experiences. 447 00:30:36,090 --> 00:30:37,080 He hasn't had any! 448 00:30:37,080 --> 00:30:39,190 How can you be so sure? 449 00:30:39,190 --> 00:30:40,890 It's something a father feels. 450 00:30:40,890 --> 00:30:43,260 I actually hit him to make him take a woman, look! 451 00:30:43,260 --> 00:30:45,310 All I got was an injured my hand! 452 00:30:45,310 --> 00:30:48,660 Come to the studio to see where Carletto works. 453 00:30:51,790 --> 00:30:54,040 I suspect the furnishings were your idea. 454 00:30:54,040 --> 00:30:58,450 Yes! Everything must remind him of sex. I selected these furnishings myself! 455 00:31:00,410 --> 00:31:03,350 See? Nothing. Come on girls! 456 00:31:03,610 --> 00:31:08,250 Jump on him! Attack him like an armed combat! 457 00:31:08,250 --> 00:31:10,970 Use your knives, use your bombs! 458 00:31:10,970 --> 00:31:12,930 Grab him! Hold him down! 459 00:31:12,930 --> 00:31:15,960 His trousers! Get his trousers! 460 00:31:15,960 --> 00:31:18,100 - Bad girls! - He ran away! 461 00:31:19,170 --> 00:31:20,540 You write: 462 00:31:20,540 --> 00:31:24,290 "I was able to cure the boy with trickery. 463 00:31:24,290 --> 00:31:26,720 "I wore mens' clothing." 464 00:31:26,720 --> 00:31:29,220 What inspired you to do that? 465 00:31:29,220 --> 00:31:31,900 It was intuition more than an inspiration. 466 00:31:31,900 --> 00:31:34,460 I had read something about it ... 467 00:31:34,460 --> 00:31:38,820 ... and remembered a colleague who had a similar case in the past. 468 00:31:39,520 --> 00:31:42,690 So, you were wearing mens' clothes, ... 469 00:31:42,690 --> 00:31:46,020 ... with the girl... er, the boy..., 470 00:31:46,020 --> 00:31:50,870 ... and what... what happened? I don't see where this is going, Miss! 471 00:33:03,200 --> 00:33:06,150 He could only do something with a woman wearing mens' clothes. 472 00:33:07,360 --> 00:33:11,200 Well, usually these are the behavior of psycho... 473 00:33:11,200 --> 00:33:12,560 Psychopaths. 474 00:33:13,520 --> 00:33:14,580 Thank you. 475 00:33:16,300 --> 00:33:18,090 But... thank you. 476 00:33:18,920 --> 00:33:23,980 But you said that the... that this was factual... 477 00:33:24,840 --> 00:33:26,540 - I said it was. - I see. 478 00:33:27,330 --> 00:33:29,070 Come in! Come in! 479 00:33:29,070 --> 00:33:33,000 I want a masculine woman! Put the hat on! 480 00:33:33,460 --> 00:33:35,220 Good! Bravo! 481 00:33:35,220 --> 00:33:36,880 The second one! Come in! Come in! 482 00:33:36,880 --> 00:33:38,310 That's it... 483 00:33:39,340 --> 00:33:42,770 She's quite manly! Take it, take it! 484 00:33:42,770 --> 00:33:46,860 Smoke! Come on, smoke it! 485 00:33:46,860 --> 00:33:48,730 Bravo! Go! 486 00:33:49,230 --> 00:33:53,300 The boxing girl! Come on, punch me! 487 00:33:53,300 --> 00:33:55,790 Go, go! Very good! 488 00:33:58,190 --> 00:34:00,680 - Let's go! - She packs a punch! Let's go! 489 00:34:01,280 --> 00:34:02,600 It wasn't my fault. 490 00:34:02,600 --> 00:34:04,240 It was the father's. 491 00:34:04,240 --> 00:34:06,130 He was too eager for his son's recovery. 492 00:34:06,130 --> 00:34:11,080 He made all his secretaries wear mens' clothes. 493 00:34:15,800 --> 00:34:17,010 Don't move! 494 00:34:17,460 --> 00:34:18,570 I said don't move! 495 00:34:19,060 --> 00:34:20,690 Yes, yes, yes! 496 00:34:21,330 --> 00:34:23,540 I like this game! 497 00:34:23,540 --> 00:34:25,880 Since then, Carletto has taken advantage of it. 498 00:34:25,880 --> 00:34:29,110 He liked his father's idea so much, ... 499 00:34:29,110 --> 00:34:32,340 ... that after a few days he hired other secretaries for himself. 500 00:34:32,340 --> 00:34:35,380 He ran wild! Yes, he ran wild! 501 00:34:35,380 --> 00:34:38,450 His father should be happy now! 502 00:34:38,450 --> 00:34:40,280 His son was cured! 503 00:34:40,280 --> 00:34:42,940 - And from then on, he could enjoy... - The stone! 504 00:34:42,940 --> 00:34:44,630 ... sex in a normal way! 505 00:34:44,630 --> 00:34:45,500 The stone! 506 00:34:45,500 --> 00:34:46,580 - The stone, madam! - What about the stone? 507 00:34:46,580 --> 00:34:48,570 The stone in your hand, madam! 508 00:34:48,570 --> 00:34:50,140 You've been hitting my hand with it for some time! 509 00:34:50,140 --> 00:34:51,160 I apologize. 510 00:34:51,160 --> 00:34:52,850 Damn, she raised quite a bruise! 511 00:34:53,850 --> 00:34:55,420 The son had completely recovered. 512 00:34:55,420 --> 00:34:57,370 But his father was sick. 513 00:34:57,370 --> 00:34:59,900 A few weeks later, his lawyer called me. 514 00:34:59,900 --> 00:35:01,910 He was desperate. 515 00:35:01,910 --> 00:35:03,470 He cried like a baby. 516 00:35:09,080 --> 00:35:10,710 What happened? 517 00:35:11,350 --> 00:35:13,270 What do you mean what happened? 518 00:35:13,270 --> 00:35:14,940 I'm ruined! A desperate man! 519 00:35:14,940 --> 00:35:17,370 My son has become a monster! Look! 520 00:35:17,370 --> 00:35:19,770 Look what your idea has done to me! 521 00:35:19,770 --> 00:35:22,490 Look what has happened to these two poor girls! 522 00:35:22,490 --> 00:35:24,380 And they're not the only ones! 523 00:35:43,010 --> 00:35:46,670 It looks like they got it in the end, Father! 524 00:35:47,070 --> 00:35:48,980 Professor! 525 00:35:50,370 --> 00:35:52,380 I feel sick! 526 00:35:52,380 --> 00:35:54,650 I feel sick too! 527 00:35:54,750 --> 00:35:56,740 I feel sick for those poor girls! 528 00:35:56,740 --> 00:35:59,220 I apologize! If we have to listen, let's get on with it! 529 00:36:01,080 --> 00:36:04,900 Can I get in? Is it true that a hooker is getting a degree? 530 00:36:04,900 --> 00:36:08,980 Let me in, come on! 531 00:36:09,280 --> 00:36:12,130 One of my colleagues is getting a degree! Let me in! 532 00:36:14,380 --> 00:36:15,600 Are you feeling me up? 533 00:36:18,790 --> 00:36:20,960 Quiet! Quiet! 534 00:36:25,090 --> 00:36:26,710 Conigliero, make them shut up! 535 00:36:34,920 --> 00:36:37,430 You're such an asshole! 536 00:36:42,620 --> 00:36:44,220 Please continue, Miss. 537 00:36:44,320 --> 00:36:46,630 As I said, anything can happen. 538 00:36:46,630 --> 00:36:48,060 It's a job with a lot of variety. 539 00:37:03,100 --> 00:37:04,030 Good evening. 540 00:37:04,130 --> 00:37:05,660 Come in, quickly! 541 00:37:11,110 --> 00:37:12,640 Did you just phone me a few minutes ago? 542 00:37:12,740 --> 00:37:14,330 Yes, that was me. 543 00:37:14,630 --> 00:37:17,220 I called you on the phone... 544 00:37:26,120 --> 00:37:27,400 Come in. 545 00:37:27,980 --> 00:37:30,150 - Me? - Yes... 546 00:37:37,970 --> 00:37:39,110 Sorry! 547 00:37:41,580 --> 00:37:43,680 You're so ugly! 548 00:37:45,260 --> 00:37:46,970 That makes you laugh, to be called ugly? 549 00:37:47,070 --> 00:37:51,030 No, I laugh because everybody thinks so. I'm not ugly, I just have character. 550 00:37:53,680 --> 00:37:55,310 You mean me? 551 00:37:56,180 --> 00:37:58,790 What are you looking at? Have I done something? 552 00:37:59,610 --> 00:38:01,530 I'm looking at your large bulge! 553 00:38:04,370 --> 00:38:05,230 Well, yes... 554 00:38:05,770 --> 00:38:09,220 Tell me, would you like to do something? 555 00:38:09,620 --> 00:38:11,650 You're quite an animal, Miss! 556 00:38:11,950 --> 00:38:14,120 I'm to take that as a compliment, no? 557 00:38:14,120 --> 00:38:15,340 Yes! 558 00:38:17,440 --> 00:38:20,080 So, would you like to get down to business? 559 00:38:20,080 --> 00:38:21,460 Bad boy! 560 00:38:22,900 --> 00:38:26,000 But you'll have to be quick, I have another appointment. 561 00:38:26,000 --> 00:38:28,520 Yes, sure! I'll be quick! 562 00:38:29,810 --> 00:38:31,530 Then come on, quickly! 563 00:38:33,720 --> 00:38:36,280 I apologize for touching you, Miss. I'll be quick. 564 00:38:44,430 --> 00:38:45,570 All done! 565 00:38:47,610 --> 00:38:50,100 I told you to be quick, but that was too quick! 566 00:38:50,100 --> 00:38:52,800 I couldn't control myself, but if you don't mind, I'll try again. 567 00:38:53,710 --> 00:38:55,330 Don't tell me you've already recovered... 568 00:38:55,340 --> 00:38:56,950 Touch it if you don't believe me. 569 00:38:59,570 --> 00:39:01,080 Are you a man or a wild baboon? 570 00:39:01,080 --> 00:39:03,320 Do you think I'm a baboon? 571 00:39:03,930 --> 00:39:05,780 I just thought I'd ask. 572 00:39:07,210 --> 00:39:08,460 Do it... 573 00:39:10,350 --> 00:39:13,400 Miss, I apologize for lying on top of you .... 574 00:39:13,400 --> 00:39:15,210 ... but I don't know any other way. 575 00:39:16,630 --> 00:39:20,250 Just a moment. I don't mind making love with an ugly man like you, ... 576 00:39:20,250 --> 00:39:21,420 ... but do you have my money? 577 00:39:21,720 --> 00:39:23,460 Otherwise I'll get quite angry! 578 00:39:23,560 --> 00:39:24,710 Of course! 579 00:39:24,810 --> 00:39:25,880 Are you sure? 580 00:39:25,880 --> 00:39:27,510 Sure, it's in my jacket. 581 00:39:27,970 --> 00:39:29,950 Okay, I trust you. 582 00:39:29,950 --> 00:39:32,890 You shouldn't distrust me and say I'm ugly ... 583 00:39:32,890 --> 00:39:35,280 ... because I'm a really a nice guy and a gentleman. 584 00:39:35,380 --> 00:39:37,180 - May I kiss you? - No. 585 00:39:37,280 --> 00:39:38,700 Then I'll be quick. 586 00:39:43,220 --> 00:39:44,970 Ah! I've conquered you again! 587 00:39:48,570 --> 00:39:51,160 I've certainly never met anyone like you before. 588 00:39:51,170 --> 00:39:52,660 I just can't control it. Should I try again? 589 00:39:52,860 --> 00:39:54,390 No, have mercy! 590 00:39:54,810 --> 00:39:58,680 It's late. I told you I have another appointment. 591 00:40:03,520 --> 00:40:05,320 Now give me the money, young man! 592 00:40:05,320 --> 00:40:06,650 Yes, sure! 593 00:40:07,290 --> 00:40:08,500 Excuse me. 594 00:40:10,050 --> 00:40:12,140 - You didn't forgot it, did you? - Of course not. 595 00:40:13,700 --> 00:40:15,190 Here... this is for you. 596 00:40:17,240 --> 00:40:18,520 Count it. 597 00:40:25,340 --> 00:40:26,810 500.000 lire ?! 598 00:40:26,810 --> 00:40:28,140 Yes... 500.000 lire! 599 00:40:30,020 --> 00:40:31,670 Is this a joke? 600 00:40:33,970 --> 00:40:34,880 Hey... is this money real? 601 00:40:34,880 --> 00:40:38,320 I'm a gentleman, Miss. I would never play such a trick. 602 00:40:40,670 --> 00:40:42,400 So this is all for me? 603 00:40:42,400 --> 00:40:43,960 Of course... it's yours! 604 00:40:46,320 --> 00:40:48,800 You're extraordinary! 605 00:40:49,000 --> 00:40:50,940 And you're handsome! 606 00:40:51,140 --> 00:40:53,280 Even the way you speak becomes you! 607 00:40:53,580 --> 00:40:54,780 And so generous... 608 00:40:55,380 --> 00:40:56,520 Where are you from? 609 00:40:56,520 --> 00:40:58,140 From Avellino, Miss. 610 00:40:58,850 --> 00:41:03,170 That's a coincidence! I'm from Avellino too! 611 00:41:03,170 --> 00:41:04,840 My mother still lives there! 612 00:41:04,840 --> 00:41:06,840 Yes, I know your mother. She's a good woman. 613 00:41:07,140 --> 00:41:08,710 You know my mother? 614 00:41:08,710 --> 00:41:11,110 Yes! When she heard I was going to Rome, ... 615 00:41:11,110 --> 00:41:13,350 ... she asked if I could give you this 500.000 lire ... 616 00:41:13,350 --> 00:41:15,490 ... because the mail service is on strike. 617 00:41:15,490 --> 00:41:17,770 I said I would do it and she gave me your address. 618 00:41:17,770 --> 00:41:22,890 I have to go now. You've been very nice to me, even though you didn't have to. 619 00:41:22,890 --> 00:41:25,500 I'd have given you the money anyway, because I'm a gentleman. 620 00:41:25,500 --> 00:41:27,240 A simple thank you would have been enough. 621 00:41:27,540 --> 00:41:30,500 Have I got everything? I won't tell your mother about this. 622 00:41:32,270 --> 00:41:33,830 Good evening. 623 00:41:41,930 --> 00:41:43,720 Conigliero! Are we in a market-place? 624 00:41:46,190 --> 00:41:48,080 Get out! 625 00:41:50,080 --> 00:41:54,510 We'll wind up like Sweden. Don't you agree, Father? 626 00:41:55,280 --> 00:41:56,960 Tell me something, Miss. 627 00:41:57,160 --> 00:41:59,230 Did you have orgasms with your clients? 628 00:41:59,530 --> 00:42:03,490 During the 200 sexual encounters, I had an orgasm three or four times. 629 00:42:03,690 --> 00:42:05,110 I had them with my boyfriend. 630 00:43:17,850 --> 00:43:19,650 In order to make 100.000 lire, ... 631 00:43:19,650 --> 00:43:21,770 ... you need to have a certain kind of client. 632 00:43:21,870 --> 00:43:24,340 - You said 100.000? - Yes. 633 00:43:24,950 --> 00:43:26,120 Did you hear that? 634 00:43:26,510 --> 00:43:29,600 And we spend our lives working at a desk! 635 00:43:30,100 --> 00:43:35,150 Why are you so angry? Do you think that we should all go to work as prostitutes? 636 00:43:35,480 --> 00:43:38,420 We all have our jobs to do, no? Please continue... 637 00:43:38,740 --> 00:43:41,180 We have to use our advantage, my dear Professor. 638 00:43:41,280 --> 00:43:43,500 Men only want one thing. 639 00:43:43,600 --> 00:43:45,930 Luckily, we women have it! 640 00:43:46,250 --> 00:43:47,930 And you love it, eh? 641 00:43:48,430 --> 00:43:49,630 Mine, too... 642 00:43:51,820 --> 00:43:53,840 Please, ladies, that's evil... 643 00:43:53,840 --> 00:43:55,340 I'll say what I want to! 644 00:43:55,440 --> 00:43:57,140 Let's move on... what were you saying? 645 00:43:57,140 --> 00:44:01,570 In order to earn this money, you need to call special agencies. 646 00:44:03,700 --> 00:44:05,410 Phone calls... 647 00:44:06,010 --> 00:44:08,250 Companies that pose as modeling agencies. 648 00:44:08,250 --> 00:44:11,710 Or you can make appointments through the concierge at major hotels . 649 00:44:11,710 --> 00:44:14,640 This is called "home service." 650 00:44:21,340 --> 00:44:22,500 It's my wife! 651 00:44:28,410 --> 00:44:32,340 I apologize if I'm back earlier, but the evening was very boring. 652 00:44:34,160 --> 00:44:35,550 Is this your lover or a whore? 653 00:44:35,550 --> 00:44:36,730 A whore. 654 00:44:37,300 --> 00:44:39,670 They're always the best. 655 00:44:39,690 --> 00:44:41,230 Good night. 656 00:44:44,610 --> 00:44:46,740 Please, silence in the court! 657 00:44:47,140 --> 00:44:48,730 Are you a .... 658 00:44:49,650 --> 00:44:51,970 Sometimes I sent the clients away. 659 00:44:51,970 --> 00:44:55,070 This happened when they were like others I'd already studied. 660 00:44:55,070 --> 00:44:59,380 If the man seemed to be an interesting case, I admitted him to my home. 661 00:45:06,500 --> 00:45:07,530 Oh my God! 662 00:45:07,930 --> 00:45:09,630 You'll be the first of your kind that I've made love to for my study. 663 00:45:09,630 --> 00:45:11,240 Aren't you happy to see me? 664 00:45:11,240 --> 00:45:13,360 I just got out of the asylum, and I want to fuck you! 665 00:45:14,660 --> 00:45:16,900 Come in and close the door. 666 00:45:20,860 --> 00:45:22,550 What a nice house! 667 00:45:22,850 --> 00:45:24,000 Come in! 668 00:45:24,450 --> 00:45:25,760 I'm ready! 669 00:45:27,270 --> 00:45:29,730 Beautiful! Beautiful! You're so very beautiful! 670 00:45:29,730 --> 00:45:32,900 Beautiful! Beautiful! Beautiful! 671 00:45:35,030 --> 00:45:36,800 So, what are we going to do? 672 00:45:36,900 --> 00:45:38,080 You're so beautiful! 673 00:45:39,420 --> 00:45:42,080 You know, I have to tell you something. 674 00:45:42,580 --> 00:45:45,010 I've never had a woman! 675 00:45:46,750 --> 00:45:48,820 Don't tell me it's your first time with a woman! 676 00:45:48,920 --> 00:45:50,400 And a beautiful one! 677 00:45:50,880 --> 00:45:52,480 Why have you waited so long? 678 00:45:52,580 --> 00:45:55,500 I was looking for someone like you! But I've never met one! 679 00:45:55,500 --> 00:45:59,650 There were the nurses in the asylum, but I never saw them naked. 680 00:46:00,230 --> 00:46:02,550 - Are you all better now? - Yes! 681 00:46:03,970 --> 00:46:05,430 Then, come here. 682 00:46:06,950 --> 00:46:09,530 No! No! I won't come! 683 00:46:09,830 --> 00:46:10,900 Why? 684 00:46:10,900 --> 00:46:12,770 Because you don't have a penis! 685 00:46:21,060 --> 00:46:24,030 Where's my friend? The hooker. 686 00:46:24,030 --> 00:46:25,800 She must be in Caracalla! 687 00:46:26,000 --> 00:46:30,480 I'm sorry! I've been looking for her everywhere! 688 00:46:30,480 --> 00:46:32,420 She's obviously a dimwit! What a mess! 689 00:46:33,400 --> 00:46:35,460 Quiet! Now! 690 00:46:40,620 --> 00:46:41,500 It's the stone! 691 00:46:41,900 --> 00:46:43,110 That fucking stone again! 692 00:46:44,330 --> 00:46:46,520 That was a good joke! [i.e. sesso=sex sasso=stone] 693 00:46:48,600 --> 00:46:51,140 Men only know how to make crude jokes. 694 00:46:53,400 --> 00:46:55,310 What do you want? 695 00:46:55,920 --> 00:46:57,310 What does he want? 696 00:47:01,070 --> 00:47:03,520 Hey, Rodolfo Valentino, are you from Castellaneta? 697 00:47:03,920 --> 00:47:05,650 From Cerignola? 698 00:47:05,650 --> 00:47:07,760 I'm a Venetian, from Chioggia. 699 00:47:07,760 --> 00:47:09,250 Ah... just a jerk. 700 00:47:09,450 --> 00:47:11,370 - Conigliero! - Yes, professor. 701 00:47:11,380 --> 00:47:15,600 Are we on some kind of TV program? Are we going to dance the tango now? 702 00:47:16,040 --> 00:47:18,460 Go on with the tango... with the exam! 703 00:47:23,510 --> 00:47:26,400 Ladies and gentlemen, your attention please. This is the last time I'll say this! 704 00:47:28,200 --> 00:47:30,600 This classroom is not a city square! 705 00:47:30,800 --> 00:47:32,240 It's not a market-place! 706 00:47:32,340 --> 00:47:33,530 It's not a sports stadium! 707 00:47:34,260 --> 00:47:37,700 During this girl's examination, ... 708 00:47:38,600 --> 00:47:40,850 ... if this thesis is interrupted again, ... 709 00:47:41,150 --> 00:47:47,090 ... I personally will make an example of him, take him by the neck, ... 710 00:47:47,990 --> 00:47:49,900 ... and kick his ass! 711 00:47:51,090 --> 00:47:54,090 My apologies ladies, I didn't mean to say ass, but bottom. 712 00:47:55,380 --> 00:47:57,470 - Conigliero! - Coming! I'm here now... 713 00:47:57,620 --> 00:47:59,890 - Close the door! - I just closed it, Professor. 714 00:48:00,060 --> 00:48:01,480 I don't care, close it again! 715 00:48:03,220 --> 00:48:05,290 I'm usually nice, but when I get angry... 716 00:48:07,520 --> 00:48:08,520 Please... 717 00:48:08,590 --> 00:48:12,450 Home service sometimes begins with couples, but ends with groups. 718 00:48:12,550 --> 00:48:15,050 You mean... an orgy! 719 00:48:15,050 --> 00:48:17,110 We don't use the word orgy anymore. 720 00:48:17,110 --> 00:48:18,160 Really? 721 00:48:18,160 --> 00:48:19,690 It has a bad connotation. 722 00:48:19,960 --> 00:48:24,400 It's only used by common people to malign the sexual activities of the wealthy. 723 00:48:25,210 --> 00:48:27,420 The upper classes have moved on. 724 00:48:27,420 --> 00:48:30,380 They use modern terms, sometimes ones they've made up. 725 00:48:30,780 --> 00:48:33,030 For example, getting it on, ... 726 00:48:33,430 --> 00:48:34,450 ... group love, ... 727 00:48:34,650 --> 00:48:35,830 ... having a party, ... 728 00:48:36,030 --> 00:48:39,180 ... making a big, tangled pile, ... 729 00:48:39,480 --> 00:48:40,510 ... in which I was once injured ... 730 00:48:40,510 --> 00:48:41,680 You should have been on top! 731 00:48:42,690 --> 00:48:44,540 These are peculiar words. 732 00:48:45,300 --> 00:48:50,250 Proceed, Miss. Tell us the tale of Lucio, the homosexual at the hotel. 733 00:48:52,110 --> 00:48:54,130 Excuse me, where's the toilet? 734 00:48:54,230 --> 00:48:57,040 Toilet? We call it the restroom! 735 00:48:57,040 --> 00:49:00,260 You can't get lost in Italy. It's always straight ahead on the right. 736 00:49:00,260 --> 00:49:02,390 - Go and take care of everything! - Thank you! 737 00:49:02,390 --> 00:49:03,660 Same to you. 738 00:49:04,860 --> 00:49:05,860 Well! 739 00:49:11,350 --> 00:49:14,330 So Lucio, you're still single, aren't you? 740 00:49:14,430 --> 00:49:15,480 Yes, Madam. 741 00:49:15,480 --> 00:49:17,190 You're looking for another young boy. 742 00:49:17,290 --> 00:49:18,370 Unfortunately. 743 00:49:18,370 --> 00:49:18,410 You're such a bad boy! Unfortunately. 744 00:49:18,410 --> 00:49:20,690 You're such a bad boy! 745 00:49:20,690 --> 00:49:24,350 Yes! But Cesarino was nice and good! 746 00:49:24,350 --> 00:49:27,520 - So nice! - Why did you break up with him? 747 00:49:27,910 --> 00:49:30,260 Well, in strictest confidence, Madam, ... 748 00:49:30,260 --> 00:49:34,040 ... Cesarino was sterile. He couldn't have children. 749 00:49:35,030 --> 00:49:36,630 - Lucio! - I'm right here! 750 00:49:37,380 --> 00:49:40,820 Bravo, Lucio! Everything must be ready in ten minutes. 751 00:49:40,920 --> 00:49:42,790 And bring champagne to my room! 752 00:49:42,790 --> 00:49:44,450 As usual, your honor! 753 00:49:44,550 --> 00:49:47,820 All I need is here, in my suitcase! 754 00:49:47,920 --> 00:49:49,990 It's just a large hand bag, your honor. 755 00:49:50,090 --> 00:49:51,750 They make everything smaller nowadays, eh? 756 00:49:51,750 --> 00:49:54,850 I carry my suitcase for my... 757 00:49:55,850 --> 00:49:58,310 - ... extra-parliamentary adventures! - Good! 758 00:49:58,310 --> 00:49:59,550 I'm so excited today! 759 00:50:04,440 --> 00:50:07,160 My room, my key? What's the number? 760 00:50:07,160 --> 00:50:09,510 Always the same room: 223. 761 00:50:09,510 --> 00:50:11,590 Bravo! You have a good memory! 762 00:50:11,690 --> 00:50:14,010 And if someone calls, I'm not available? 763 00:50:14,110 --> 00:50:15,000 Of course. 764 00:50:15,100 --> 00:50:17,350 - I'm in Tokyo. - Where? 765 00:50:17,900 --> 00:50:20,170 - In Tokyo! - Tokyo... 766 00:50:22,040 --> 00:50:23,900 You can call it Tokyo. 767 00:50:41,930 --> 00:50:43,600 - How much? - 1.000 lire. 768 00:50:45,340 --> 00:50:47,040 - Thank you, Miss. - You're welcome. 769 00:51:02,320 --> 00:51:03,600 What kind of man is he? 770 00:51:03,600 --> 00:51:05,510 He's a Member of the Parliament. 771 00:51:06,130 --> 00:51:08,800 And he has the best room in the hotel. 772 00:51:10,610 --> 00:51:15,000 He gives great tips. So behave yourself accordingly! 773 00:51:15,630 --> 00:51:17,090 And don't forget about me. 774 00:51:17,390 --> 00:51:20,020 - What's his room number? - 223. 775 00:51:25,620 --> 00:51:27,160 Eau de parfum! 776 00:51:28,600 --> 00:51:30,460 It's always good to use some perfume! 777 00:51:37,720 --> 00:51:38,920 I'm coming! 778 00:51:39,350 --> 00:51:40,910 You look gorgeous! 779 00:51:41,010 --> 00:51:42,110 I'm coming! 780 00:51:50,000 --> 00:51:53,010 Who are you? Botticelli's Venus? 781 00:51:53,110 --> 00:51:54,630 Please, come in. 782 00:51:54,930 --> 00:51:58,880 Wonderful! Just wonderful! 783 00:52:00,020 --> 00:52:01,350 Beautiful! 784 00:52:02,420 --> 00:52:03,590 Divine! 785 00:52:04,740 --> 00:52:06,280 - Thank you, your honor. - No! 786 00:52:06,380 --> 00:52:07,490 Don't call me "your honor". 787 00:52:07,590 --> 00:52:08,770 Call me Totuccio. 788 00:52:08,870 --> 00:52:12,100 In my bedroom you may call me Totuccio! 789 00:52:13,060 --> 00:52:14,960 It's one of my pet names! 790 00:52:15,160 --> 00:52:16,680 What would you like to do, Totuccio? 791 00:52:16,680 --> 00:52:18,580 What would I like to do? What kind of question is that? 792 00:52:18,580 --> 00:52:20,130 What would I like to do? 793 00:52:21,600 --> 00:52:22,890 Everything! 794 00:52:23,510 --> 00:52:25,160 Let me look at you! 795 00:52:26,260 --> 00:52:27,560 Perfect! 796 00:52:27,660 --> 00:52:32,770 By my grandmother, the Senator was right in telling me to call you! 797 00:52:33,020 --> 00:52:34,720 When I see a woman like you... 798 00:52:35,990 --> 00:52:38,320 ... I regret my 50 years of marriage! 799 00:52:38,320 --> 00:52:39,770 - 50 years?! - Yes! 800 00:52:39,770 --> 00:52:41,310 Two wives. 801 00:52:42,250 --> 00:52:46,810 I tell you in confidence, I destroyed the first one with love! 802 00:52:46,810 --> 00:52:48,730 She died in bed. 803 00:52:48,930 --> 00:52:50,230 And the second one? 804 00:52:50,900 --> 00:52:53,920 I keep the second on a strict diet! 805 00:52:53,920 --> 00:52:56,960 Four times per year: Autumn, Winter, Spring and Summer! 806 00:52:57,840 --> 00:52:59,350 And only on odd days. 807 00:52:59,400 --> 00:53:00,680 Does she understand? 808 00:53:00,780 --> 00:53:02,630 I don't care if she understands! I just don't give it to her! 809 00:53:02,700 --> 00:53:03,810 Austerity! 810 00:53:05,480 --> 00:53:06,780 It's my kidneys! 811 00:53:06,980 --> 00:53:08,080 Thank you! 812 00:53:09,350 --> 00:53:13,430 - Is she jealous, Totuccio? - She threatens me with murder! 813 00:53:13,560 --> 00:53:16,150 And yes, she thinks I cheat on her. 814 00:53:16,550 --> 00:53:19,400 But I've always cheated on her! 815 00:53:19,900 --> 00:53:21,300 Ever since we got married. 816 00:53:21,500 --> 00:53:23,240 Everybody calls me 'The Cheater'! 817 00:53:29,840 --> 00:53:31,560 That crazy... 818 00:53:31,960 --> 00:53:33,830 Ah, the bitch from room 220! 819 00:53:42,280 --> 00:53:43,490 How cute! 820 00:53:51,240 --> 00:53:52,950 For you! 821 00:53:57,850 --> 00:54:00,850 - And for you! - Thank you! 822 00:54:05,260 --> 00:54:06,740 May I? 823 00:54:07,560 --> 00:54:09,380 One and two! 824 00:54:10,750 --> 00:54:12,060 Come in! 825 00:54:14,420 --> 00:54:16,140 - Greetings, your honor! - Ciao! 826 00:54:16,140 --> 00:54:17,340 It's Lucio. 827 00:54:22,290 --> 00:54:23,500 Just like Lucio! 828 00:54:24,650 --> 00:54:28,900 Bravo! Good! Great! Lucio is fantastic! 829 00:54:28,900 --> 00:54:30,760 Let's see what you brought. 830 00:54:30,820 --> 00:54:33,090 Don Gesualdo of 1919?! 831 00:54:33,090 --> 00:54:34,630 Italian champagne! 832 00:54:34,630 --> 00:54:36,300 That's what we need! 833 00:54:36,300 --> 00:54:38,600 - Uncork it, my young friend! - Yes! 834 00:54:38,760 --> 00:54:41,940 Take off your clothes and get into bed! 835 00:54:42,440 --> 00:54:46,230 I'll bring you the nectar of the gods! 836 00:54:46,230 --> 00:54:47,310 But what about him? 837 00:54:47,310 --> 00:54:49,800 Don't pay attention to him! He's like your sister! 838 00:54:49,800 --> 00:54:50,900 Thank you, your honor! 839 00:54:53,160 --> 00:54:54,830 He doesn't care about women's bodies! 840 00:54:55,010 --> 00:54:58,860 I get sick looking at them! They're like an alien species to me! 841 00:54:59,050 --> 00:55:00,250 So I don't attract you? 842 00:55:01,060 --> 00:55:03,180 It's true. I'm gay, Miss. 843 00:55:03,180 --> 00:55:04,580 How do you know? 844 00:55:04,650 --> 00:55:07,030 Well... I sleep with men! 845 00:55:12,680 --> 00:55:15,280 - Good morning Madame. - I'm Director Angeletti's wife. 846 00:55:15,280 --> 00:55:16,720 - What's his room? - 223. 847 00:55:16,720 --> 00:55:17,830 - Thank you! - You're welcome! 848 00:55:19,920 --> 00:55:21,810 Madame! Madame, where are you going? 849 00:55:21,810 --> 00:55:24,390 Excuse me, my lady! 850 00:55:24,420 --> 00:55:25,680 - Call the Director! - Yes! 851 00:55:25,680 --> 00:55:26,510 Madame! 852 00:55:26,810 --> 00:55:29,430 It must be the Senator asking about you! 853 00:55:31,300 --> 00:55:32,960 Hello? Who's speaking? 854 00:55:34,000 --> 00:55:35,070 What? 855 00:55:35,370 --> 00:55:36,450 Who?! 856 00:55:36,550 --> 00:55:37,600 My wife! 857 00:55:38,100 --> 00:55:39,020 Oh no! 858 00:55:39,020 --> 00:55:40,950 My wife's supposed to think I'm in Tokyo! 859 00:55:41,050 --> 00:55:42,650 Idiot! She's coming here? 860 00:55:42,950 --> 00:55:43,810 Oh God! 861 00:55:44,110 --> 00:55:45,960 Stop her, you fool! 862 00:55:46,060 --> 00:55:47,330 This is insane! 863 00:55:47,330 --> 00:55:49,200 I'm ruined! Finished! 864 00:55:49,200 --> 00:55:50,340 How did it happen? 865 00:55:50,340 --> 00:55:55,280 The stupid bellboy told my wife I'm in room 223! 866 00:55:55,280 --> 00:55:56,670 What an asshole! 867 00:55:57,090 --> 00:55:58,090 What are we going to do? 868 00:55:58,110 --> 00:55:59,210 What are you going to do? 869 00:55:59,210 --> 00:56:00,240 What would you like to do? 870 00:56:00,240 --> 00:56:02,000 What are we going to do? What are we going to do? 871 00:56:02,120 --> 00:56:03,100 I don't know! 872 00:56:03,500 --> 00:56:06,180 - Madame! Please, madame! 873 00:56:06,180 --> 00:56:07,700 - Where is he? - There must be some mistake! 874 00:56:07,750 --> 00:56:09,670 Lucio, quick! I'm sorry, dear. 875 00:56:09,690 --> 00:56:12,950 Madame, you have to believe me. Your husband is in Tokyo! 876 00:56:12,950 --> 00:56:13,690 Liar! 877 00:56:13,790 --> 00:56:15,370 Your honor, it's impossible! 878 00:56:15,380 --> 00:56:16,800 - Why? - She's coming! 879 00:56:16,900 --> 00:56:20,830 Oh God! I'm ruined! She'll tell everything in the Parliament! 880 00:56:21,020 --> 00:56:22,570 Let go of me, pimp! 881 00:56:22,570 --> 00:56:27,810 - Madame please! - Let go or I'll break my umbrella over your head! 882 00:56:30,360 --> 00:56:31,730 - Let's pretend nothing happened. - Okay. 883 00:56:32,030 --> 00:56:34,370 Aha! There's room 223! 884 00:56:34,470 --> 00:56:36,460 He won't escape this time! 885 00:56:39,050 --> 00:56:40,930 It would have been better if he'd gone to Tokyo! 886 00:56:42,290 --> 00:56:44,080 Open, cheater! 887 00:56:45,140 --> 00:56:46,410 It's the peasant woman! 888 00:56:46,510 --> 00:56:48,190 We're trapped, Lucio! 889 00:56:48,190 --> 00:56:51,260 - It's the end of everything. - Why don't you escape out the window, your honor? 890 00:56:51,260 --> 00:56:53,420 If I was brave enough, I'd do it! 891 00:56:53,620 --> 00:56:56,830 Open up, coward! I know you're in there! 892 00:56:56,830 --> 00:56:58,270 Fucking Member of Parliament! 893 00:56:59,420 --> 00:57:01,470 Wait! What if I hide in the wardrobe? 894 00:57:01,470 --> 00:57:03,750 If your wife doesn't see you, she'll search for you! 895 00:57:03,750 --> 00:57:06,680 Hey! What if Lucio pretends he's your wife... 896 00:57:06,680 --> 00:57:07,660 - Right! - ... I mean, your husband! 897 00:57:07,740 --> 00:57:09,600 No, your honor... it's no time for jokes! 898 00:57:10,000 --> 00:57:11,810 Open or I'll break it down! 899 00:57:13,620 --> 00:57:15,640 Quick Lucio! Get undressed! 900 00:57:15,650 --> 00:57:18,040 You're not my kind of man, and your wife is behind that door! 901 00:57:18,040 --> 00:57:18,230 If she sees us, she'll kill us! You're not my kind of man, and your wife is behind that door! 902 00:57:18,230 --> 00:57:19,040 If she sees us, she'll kill us! 903 00:57:19,040 --> 00:57:20,370 You're the only one who can save me! 904 00:57:23,170 --> 00:57:25,340 I know you're in there! I know it! 905 00:57:26,140 --> 00:57:28,050 Don't insist! Not for a million! 906 00:57:28,050 --> 00:57:29,540 Ask for anything you want! 907 00:57:30,040 --> 00:57:31,040 Anything at all? 908 00:57:31,040 --> 00:57:32,000 Yes! Anything at all! 909 00:57:32,000 --> 00:57:34,040 I want to marry Ignazio, the night concierge. 910 00:57:34,210 --> 00:57:37,270 All right! I'll write a new law, and put it up for a vote! 911 00:57:37,370 --> 00:57:38,900 We can get married in Sweden! 912 00:57:39,000 --> 00:57:42,230 I'll get in the wardrobe! Don't open the door! 913 00:57:42,230 --> 00:57:44,860 I'll marry Ignazio! I'll marry Ignazio! 914 00:57:44,960 --> 00:57:46,730 Luckily, my trousseau is all prepared! 915 00:57:48,110 --> 00:57:48,980 Let's go! 916 00:57:49,380 --> 00:57:51,790 I'm very angry, Member of Parliament! 917 00:57:52,320 --> 00:57:55,050 - God forgives, I don't! - What do you want, madame? No one is here! 918 00:57:55,210 --> 00:57:58,420 - Where's Totuccio? - Totuccio? Is that your dog? 919 00:57:58,430 --> 00:58:01,360 No! He's an asshole and if I find him, I'll kill him! 920 00:58:01,460 --> 00:58:03,650 That will be difficult, Madame. 921 00:58:03,750 --> 00:58:05,170 You think so? 922 00:58:05,170 --> 00:58:07,150 Yes! I've never seen anyone kill an asshole! 923 00:58:07,150 --> 00:58:08,750 - Have you, my dear? - Never! 924 00:58:09,510 --> 00:58:10,470 Who are you? 925 00:58:10,480 --> 00:58:13,260 - Me? - Why are you here at 223? 926 00:58:13,260 --> 00:58:15,880 I'm 223's husband! 927 00:58:16,360 --> 00:58:20,040 Lucio, I'm fed up with her. Send her away and come to bed! 928 00:58:20,040 --> 00:58:25,260 You heard her? You'll have to leave! I have to finish what you interrupted! 929 00:58:25,920 --> 00:58:27,520 So you're Lucio, eh? 930 00:58:27,620 --> 00:58:29,530 Yes... you don't like my name? 931 00:58:29,830 --> 00:58:30,920 A nice name! 932 00:58:31,020 --> 00:58:34,590 I was told that the waiter who brought the champagne had the same name! 933 00:58:34,690 --> 00:58:36,500 Really? What a coincidence! 934 00:58:36,600 --> 00:58:39,950 Coincidence! I can see there's champagne here too! 935 00:58:40,050 --> 00:58:41,450 Oh... another coincidence! 936 00:58:42,150 --> 00:58:44,930 - Would you care for a glass? - I'd love to! 937 00:58:45,550 --> 00:58:50,170 Are we the only ones who are celebrating? 938 00:58:50,170 --> 00:58:53,320 I think someone is missing here! 939 00:58:53,320 --> 00:58:55,470 Madame stop with this drama! 940 00:58:56,330 --> 00:58:57,670 - Lucio? - Yes? 941 00:58:57,670 --> 00:58:59,280 For the very last time, send her away! 942 00:58:59,280 --> 00:59:01,720 - Yes. - Quick, send her away! 943 00:59:02,010 --> 00:59:06,180 You heard my wife? I'm afraid I must get rude now! 944 00:59:07,980 --> 00:59:11,410 Open that wardrobe and let my fucking husband out! 945 00:59:11,910 --> 00:59:14,400 Madame, I told you no one else is here! 946 00:59:14,600 --> 00:59:16,910 I count till 3, then I shoot! 947 00:59:16,910 --> 00:59:18,810 - One! Two! - Not my balls! 948 00:59:19,110 --> 00:59:24,020 Open up, Lucio! My wife will do anything. I know she means it! 949 00:59:25,870 --> 00:59:27,340 A ghost! 950 00:59:39,120 --> 00:59:40,300 Come out! 951 00:59:41,100 --> 00:59:44,220 Now repeat: "I'm a bastard!" 952 00:59:44,720 --> 00:59:46,120 I'm a bastard! 953 00:59:46,120 --> 00:59:47,450 Get over there! 954 00:59:47,950 --> 00:59:49,090 Get into the bed! 955 00:59:49,190 --> 00:59:50,300 No, Madame! It's impossible! 956 00:59:50,300 --> 00:59:53,580 Why? Aren't you husband and wife? Consummate, quick! 957 00:59:53,580 --> 00:59:55,470 I can't! I have a physical problem. 958 00:59:55,470 --> 00:59:56,640 Consummate... now! 959 00:59:56,640 --> 00:59:57,720 I'm virgin! 960 01:00:00,070 --> 01:00:01,430 Consummate! 961 01:00:02,210 --> 01:00:06,300 Look, cheater! Your lover is cheating on you! 962 01:00:06,400 --> 01:00:07,730 Get your hands down! 963 01:00:08,810 --> 01:00:10,440 You're doing it! 964 01:00:10,440 --> 01:00:12,870 Of course, otherwise she'll shoot us! 965 01:00:13,170 --> 01:00:15,050 Then you are not gay! 966 01:00:15,150 --> 01:00:16,640 Don't be silly! Of course not! 967 01:00:17,040 --> 01:00:18,270 Why do you pretend then? 968 01:00:18,270 --> 01:00:23,200 Because if I pretend to be gay, everyone asks me if I've ever slept with a woman. 969 01:00:23,670 --> 01:00:24,870 And I say I haven't. 970 01:00:25,170 --> 01:00:28,060 Then they ask me to try... and I agree. 971 01:00:31,500 --> 01:00:34,020 - Are you finished? - Be patient. As you know, Madame ... 972 01:00:34,120 --> 01:00:36,320 ... I've never done it with a gun or a woman. 973 01:00:36,720 --> 01:00:38,050 Just a moment... 974 01:00:38,770 --> 01:00:42,080 One second... one second... 975 01:00:42,780 --> 01:00:45,980 Another second... and I'll come! 976 01:00:46,180 --> 01:00:49,220 Yes... I came! 977 01:00:49,220 --> 01:00:52,080 - I came. - Me too! 978 01:00:54,180 --> 01:00:56,500 All right then. I'll get dressed and we can leave. 979 01:00:56,500 --> 01:00:57,930 Take my clothes off! 980 01:00:58,230 --> 01:01:00,630 Here? In front of strangers? 981 01:01:00,640 --> 01:01:03,760 I told you to get me undressed! Don't make me repeat things! 982 01:01:03,860 --> 01:01:05,080 You're crazy! 983 01:01:05,080 --> 01:01:07,660 Yes, I'm totally insane! 984 01:01:07,660 --> 01:01:08,880 Now get me undressed! 985 01:01:09,280 --> 01:01:11,020 All right, all right! 986 01:01:12,020 --> 01:01:14,810 See what I have to do! Calm down, calm down! 987 01:01:15,110 --> 01:01:16,320 Wife, please... 988 01:01:17,020 --> 01:01:19,530 This thing... how do I get it off? Help me with the fasteners! 989 01:01:19,530 --> 01:01:21,420 Calm down, calm down! 990 01:01:22,620 --> 01:01:24,060 You, woman! Get up! 991 01:01:24,060 --> 01:01:25,440 Get up! 992 01:01:25,840 --> 01:01:27,140 What do you want me to do? 993 01:01:27,540 --> 01:01:28,930 Lucio, you get up too! 994 01:01:28,930 --> 01:01:30,630 - Go! - Yes.. of course! 995 01:01:30,630 --> 01:01:33,610 You stay there, Miss. But Lucio remains in the bed! 996 01:01:33,620 --> 01:01:35,450 Yes, stay in the bed! And we'll leave! 997 01:01:35,450 --> 01:01:38,010 No! You don't understand! 998 01:01:38,610 --> 01:01:41,300 You all have to stay here! 999 01:01:41,300 --> 01:01:42,890 What are we going to do? Group sex? 1000 01:01:43,580 --> 01:01:46,090 And you, young man... 1001 01:01:47,500 --> 01:01:48,850 - What are you doing? - Young man! 1002 01:01:48,880 --> 01:01:51,010 - Fuck me! - That not possible, Madame! 1003 01:01:51,510 --> 01:01:52,420 Oh God! 1004 01:01:53,600 --> 01:01:56,400 He's fucking her for sure! I can see! 1005 01:01:56,770 --> 01:01:58,190 Come on, come on! 1006 01:01:58,390 --> 01:01:59,630 But he's gay! 1007 01:01:59,730 --> 01:02:00,880 You're humiliating him! 1008 01:02:00,890 --> 01:02:02,330 Tell her, Lucio! 1009 01:02:03,230 --> 01:02:07,250 Yes, you heard your husband, Madame? 1010 01:02:07,350 --> 01:02:08,590 I'm gay! 1011 01:02:08,890 --> 01:02:13,020 If all gays are like you... 1012 01:02:16,130 --> 01:02:17,850 He's really good, eh? 1013 01:02:18,940 --> 01:02:20,900 He's not faking it, your honor! 1014 01:02:21,600 --> 01:02:23,020 What do you mean? 1015 01:02:23,190 --> 01:02:25,550 I mean that he's making you a cuckold! 1016 01:02:26,530 --> 01:02:30,220 Lucio! Are you pretending or are you fucking? 1017 01:02:30,230 --> 01:02:33,880 I don't know... is this how it's done? 1018 01:02:34,590 --> 01:02:35,990 Of course it is! 1019 01:02:36,090 --> 01:02:38,190 Lucio, try to remember what you are! 1020 01:02:38,290 --> 01:02:39,320 Yes, yes... 1021 01:02:39,320 --> 01:02:40,540 Are you still doing it? 1022 01:02:40,640 --> 01:02:43,010 - I don't know... I don't know. - That's impossible! 1023 01:02:43,510 --> 01:02:44,910 I feel a strange force... 1024 01:02:45,410 --> 01:02:47,280 A force that's working a miracle! 1025 01:02:47,580 --> 01:02:49,010 A miracle, uh? 1026 01:02:49,110 --> 01:02:50,450 Get off that horse! 1027 01:02:50,550 --> 01:02:52,850 I must apologize, Madame. I have to go now. 1028 01:02:52,850 --> 01:02:56,880 No! Keep going, my young stud! 1029 01:02:56,880 --> 01:02:59,450 I'm afraid I can't stop now, your honor. 1030 01:02:59,520 --> 01:03:02,730 Go on, don't stop! You're doing so well! More! 1031 01:03:02,730 --> 01:03:05,260 You see? I can't stop! I mustn't stop! 1032 01:03:05,360 --> 01:03:08,970 What a day! It's like being in a stable with the horses! 1033 01:03:11,870 --> 01:03:13,020 Hello? 1034 01:03:13,320 --> 01:03:14,290 Yes! 1035 01:03:14,590 --> 01:03:17,170 Yes, I ordered room service. 1036 01:03:17,770 --> 01:03:19,540 What do you mean, who serviced the room? 1037 01:03:20,950 --> 01:03:23,390 The one who's doing a great job servicing my wife! 1038 01:03:26,080 --> 01:03:27,130 Quiet! 1039 01:03:27,230 --> 01:03:28,550 Quiet! 1040 01:03:29,190 --> 01:03:31,640 That's Diana, one of my friends! 1041 01:03:32,040 --> 01:03:33,500 I taught her ... 1042 01:03:33,600 --> 01:03:35,820 ... in a fine college! 1043 01:03:35,820 --> 01:03:37,180 Quiet! 1044 01:03:37,180 --> 01:03:38,240 She said, "quiet"! 1045 01:03:38,240 --> 01:03:40,090 Yes, do it! So we can continue! 1046 01:03:40,190 --> 01:03:41,260 Go on then! 1047 01:03:41,430 --> 01:03:43,390 So, Miss, continue! 1048 01:05:56,870 --> 01:05:59,080 This chapter is dated only few days ago. 1049 01:05:59,680 --> 01:06:02,600 The one about the... the Mafioso in love. 1050 01:06:03,100 --> 01:06:06,220 "In love" is actually his name. He is called Frank Innamorato. 1051 01:06:06,990 --> 01:06:08,900 - The killer?! - Yes, that's him. 1052 01:06:09,070 --> 01:06:11,520 - You know that terrible criminal? - Yes. 1053 01:06:11,690 --> 01:06:14,280 Don't tell me that you... with him too? 1054 01:06:14,380 --> 01:06:16,240 What do you mean when you say you know him? 1055 01:06:16,240 --> 01:06:17,670 In the biblical sense? 1056 01:06:17,870 --> 01:06:21,010 One day I was called for a home service. 1057 01:06:21,310 --> 01:06:23,700 I said that I couldn't go out that night. 1058 01:06:24,100 --> 01:06:28,100 Actually I was going to meet my fiancé, whom I hadn't seen for a long time. 1059 01:06:28,730 --> 01:06:32,370 The man who called didn't care about my problems, and told me to be on time. 1060 01:06:32,470 --> 01:06:35,000 He told me to wear a black dress, and to be a blond. 1061 01:06:35,610 --> 01:06:37,720 He wanted someone who looked like Jean Harlow. 1062 01:06:37,920 --> 01:06:40,400 I tried to tell him again that I couldn't go that night, ... 1063 01:06:40,500 --> 01:06:43,400 ... but he wouldn't listen, and hung up. 1064 01:06:51,580 --> 01:06:54,020 I was curious, and decided to go. 1065 01:06:59,830 --> 01:07:01,830 We've arrived, blondie! Get out! 1066 01:07:02,980 --> 01:07:04,690 Get out... quickly! 1067 01:07:05,620 --> 01:07:07,350 Are you still in the car? 1068 01:07:08,020 --> 01:07:09,880 You don't know who's waiting for you! 1069 01:07:09,980 --> 01:07:11,820 - Hey, wait a minute! - This is your night! 1070 01:07:12,090 --> 01:07:13,550 You'll have a wild night! 1071 01:07:13,650 --> 01:07:15,350 - Have the guys arrived? - They're all inside. 1072 01:07:15,360 --> 01:07:16,910 Come on, move! Let's not waste time! 1073 01:07:16,980 --> 01:07:18,890 Hey, guys! Hey, guys! 1074 01:07:19,840 --> 01:07:21,330 We've arrived! 1075 01:07:22,500 --> 01:07:24,590 Armando? Come here! 1076 01:07:26,620 --> 01:07:27,700 Carmelo? 1077 01:07:28,000 --> 01:07:29,230 Don't make me drag you! 1078 01:07:29,230 --> 01:07:30,610 Ciccio, come here! 1079 01:07:30,710 --> 01:07:32,500 Let go of my arm, I'll have bruises tomorrow! 1080 01:08:14,850 --> 01:08:18,850 - Am I scaring you? - Yes. 1081 01:08:21,190 --> 01:08:23,870 - Do you know who I am? - Yes. 1082 01:08:25,480 --> 01:08:29,530 - Do you know my name? - Frank Innamorato. 1083 01:08:30,960 --> 01:08:35,240 - Do you know what people call me? - The woman beater. 1084 01:08:36,990 --> 01:08:40,670 - Why is that? - I can only imagine! 1085 01:08:57,360 --> 01:08:59,150 Now you know why. 1086 01:08:59,440 --> 01:09:00,680 Let's go. 1087 01:09:00,880 --> 01:09:02,240 - Frank! - What? 1088 01:09:04,550 --> 01:09:06,980 Don't hurt me too badly. I beg you! 1089 01:09:09,300 --> 01:09:11,040 Listen to me, girl! 1090 01:09:11,890 --> 01:09:14,530 When I run wild, even God can't stop me! 1091 01:09:15,350 --> 01:09:18,020 I can't help it. I can't do anything to change it. 1092 01:09:18,960 --> 01:09:20,540 It's the same when I shoot. 1093 01:09:21,040 --> 01:09:23,330 A gun in my hands becomes an atomic bomb! 1094 01:09:25,540 --> 01:09:27,270 Once you climb that staircase, ... 1095 01:09:27,770 --> 01:09:29,990 ... I can't promise you'll return home. 1096 01:09:32,420 --> 01:09:35,470 So... what would you like to do? 1097 01:09:40,730 --> 01:09:42,090 Let's go. 1098 01:09:45,070 --> 01:09:46,960 Have fun! 1099 01:10:11,200 --> 01:10:12,610 No! Give me your foot! 1100 01:10:14,030 --> 01:10:15,790 - This one? - It doesn't matter which one. 1101 01:10:25,590 --> 01:10:27,250 Nothing! Damn! 1102 01:10:27,650 --> 01:10:30,370 - It seemed like it was good... - It was false alarm. 1103 01:10:38,640 --> 01:10:39,590 Harder. 1104 01:10:41,030 --> 01:10:42,190 Harder! 1105 01:10:50,340 --> 01:10:51,780 Judas! 1106 01:10:56,980 --> 01:10:59,780 Poor Frank! It's terrible! 1107 01:11:00,690 --> 01:11:02,930 It's the biggest injustice in the world! 1108 01:11:04,100 --> 01:11:05,690 There's nothing you can do. 1109 01:11:05,890 --> 01:11:10,150 I've spent millions on doctors, scientists, miracle cures... but nothing! 1110 01:11:10,650 --> 01:11:13,000 I even spoke with a snake charmer. 1111 01:11:13,300 --> 01:11:16,470 Why do people call you a woman-beater? 1112 01:11:16,870 --> 01:11:19,690 Money. Money! 1113 01:11:21,270 --> 01:11:23,360 I bought my reputation, okay? I paid for it! 1114 01:11:23,560 --> 01:11:25,070 Do you understand? I paid for it! 1115 01:11:25,890 --> 01:11:28,110 I'm losing everything... damn! 1116 01:11:33,090 --> 01:11:34,590 What are you laughing at? 1117 01:11:34,840 --> 01:11:36,920 Fuck? No, nothing... 1118 01:11:38,440 --> 01:11:39,890 That poor girl. 1119 01:11:40,290 --> 01:11:42,520 She doesn't know what it will happen to her! 1120 01:11:42,520 --> 01:11:45,500 Frank Innamorato is a psycho case! 1121 01:11:45,770 --> 01:11:48,180 He needs a woman every day. 1122 01:11:48,380 --> 01:11:52,170 Can you imagine us alone with him in the desert? 1123 01:11:53,990 --> 01:11:56,030 We'd have to sacrifice ourselves. 1124 01:12:03,970 --> 01:12:07,800 I can't have fun without letting all the organization know about it! 1125 01:12:08,360 --> 01:12:09,840 They believe it! 1126 01:12:10,040 --> 01:12:11,540 They call me the fucking machine. 1127 01:12:11,940 --> 01:12:13,170 Instead... 1128 01:12:16,150 --> 01:12:18,710 Diana, you have to help me. 1129 01:12:19,110 --> 01:12:22,100 - What can I do? - If they find out, I'll be ruined! 1130 01:12:22,140 --> 01:12:23,960 They'll put a bomb up my ass! 1131 01:12:24,060 --> 01:12:26,000 - Help me! - How? 1132 01:12:27,260 --> 01:12:28,450 Let's pretend. 1133 01:12:28,750 --> 01:12:31,940 I'll pretend I'm hitting you, and you scream loudly. 1134 01:12:32,050 --> 01:12:33,080 Okay. 1135 01:12:33,180 --> 01:12:34,790 I've done this with all the other women. 1136 01:12:40,560 --> 01:12:41,910 - Are you ready? - Yes, sure! 1137 01:12:46,470 --> 01:12:47,650 Louder! 1138 01:12:48,430 --> 01:12:50,390 - Help me... - Help me! 1139 01:12:50,590 --> 01:12:53,240 - Don't kill me... - Don't kill me! Don't kill me! 1140 01:12:53,640 --> 01:12:55,530 What sweet music! 1141 01:12:56,040 --> 01:12:58,960 He's just like his father, eh? 1142 01:13:01,130 --> 01:13:02,540 What do you want me to say... 1143 01:13:03,240 --> 01:13:04,530 I love you! 1144 01:13:05,230 --> 01:13:06,460 You're killing me! 1145 01:13:07,060 --> 01:13:08,430 I love it! 1146 01:13:09,230 --> 01:13:10,710 - What did you say? - You make me hot! 1147 01:13:10,710 --> 01:13:12,400 You make me hot! 1148 01:13:12,500 --> 01:13:13,720 You're so handsome! 1149 01:13:14,120 --> 01:13:15,320 You're such a man! 1150 01:13:15,820 --> 01:13:17,060 So masculine! 1151 01:13:17,360 --> 01:13:18,520 You're a man! 1152 01:13:18,530 --> 01:13:19,730 A man! 1153 01:13:25,890 --> 01:13:27,130 Here he comes. 1154 01:13:31,590 --> 01:13:32,900 Here you go. 1155 01:13:37,250 --> 01:13:38,940 Four times in one night. 1156 01:13:39,370 --> 01:13:40,700 She was insatiable. 1157 01:13:41,440 --> 01:13:44,340 Worse than that tall woman you brought me yesterday. 1158 01:13:46,160 --> 01:13:47,650 Take her home. 1159 01:13:48,090 --> 01:13:49,890 Give her a thousand. 1160 01:13:51,680 --> 01:13:52,790 Come on, guys. 1161 01:14:29,340 --> 01:14:30,660 Please... continue. 1162 01:14:31,790 --> 01:14:35,400 Another way for beautiful prostitutes to earn money is ... 1163 01:14:35,500 --> 01:14:37,900 ... posing for sex comics, ... 1164 01:14:37,900 --> 01:14:40,270 ... making hardcore photos, ... 1165 01:14:40,280 --> 01:14:42,830 ... and in pornographic films. 1166 01:14:43,130 --> 01:14:46,760 In order to know about them, I tried them all. 1167 01:14:51,600 --> 01:14:54,010 Bring the girls onto the set! 1168 01:14:54,310 --> 01:14:55,460 Quickly, quickly! 1169 01:14:55,470 --> 01:14:58,220 You're too fat! You eat too much pasta! 1170 01:14:58,620 --> 01:15:03,200 I've worked out some great positions for the two of you, .... 1171 01:15:03,200 --> 01:15:05,540 ... very erotic ones. Let's see... 1172 01:15:06,090 --> 01:15:07,380 You! 1173 01:15:08,290 --> 01:15:10,400 You Italians are so excitable! 1174 01:15:11,330 --> 01:15:12,390 Let's go. 1175 01:15:13,280 --> 01:15:14,400 We have work to do! 1176 01:15:14,500 --> 01:15:15,850 Get the young man ready. 1177 01:15:16,250 --> 01:15:17,790 Undress him. 1178 01:15:22,350 --> 01:15:24,000 This one's nice! Yes... 1179 01:15:24,890 --> 01:15:26,280 That's it, don't move. 1180 01:15:46,460 --> 01:15:48,650 This was the "Alien" position. 1181 01:15:49,150 --> 01:15:51,000 It allowed the partners to read, ... 1182 01:15:51,100 --> 01:15:52,260 ... to eat, ... 1183 01:15:52,260 --> 01:15:53,850 ... or watch TV. 1184 01:15:54,150 --> 01:15:57,980 I can recommend it for TV shows and comedies. 1185 01:15:59,220 --> 01:16:01,880 The "Burn Baby, Burn" position. 1186 01:16:01,880 --> 01:16:03,840 It's sometimes used with a sister or brother in law, ... 1187 01:16:03,840 --> 01:16:05,630 ... or with an aunt and her nephew. 1188 01:16:06,290 --> 01:16:08,880 This is the "Thank You for a Hot December" position. 1189 01:16:08,980 --> 01:16:13,200 Breathe slowly, and hold the breath in. It's better if it's hot. 1190 01:16:13,200 --> 01:16:16,150 Stretch your tendons and wait until they move. 1191 01:16:16,150 --> 01:16:17,800 If you can do it, it's very good. 1192 01:16:17,800 --> 01:16:19,270 It is used mainly in southern Italy. 1193 01:16:20,070 --> 01:16:22,130 This is the "Chair" position. 1194 01:16:22,630 --> 01:16:26,490 It has an ancient origin, before the invention of the chair itself. 1195 01:16:27,200 --> 01:16:28,870 Before its invention, women ... 1196 01:16:28,870 --> 01:16:30,860 ... solved the problem of sitting ... 1197 01:16:30,860 --> 01:16:32,990 ... in this ingenious way. 1198 01:16:33,290 --> 01:16:35,600 It's the favorite position among feminists. 1199 01:16:36,560 --> 01:16:37,870 This is the "Classic" position. 1200 01:16:37,870 --> 01:16:39,990 It is also known as the "Wedding" position. 1201 01:16:40,090 --> 01:16:41,820 It is rarely used nowadays. 1202 01:16:41,820 --> 01:16:43,370 Young people in particular don't like it. 1203 01:16:43,370 --> 01:16:44,850 We don't know why. 1204 01:16:45,050 --> 01:16:47,260 There's an investigation to learn why. 1205 01:16:47,360 --> 01:16:48,930 Great! Fabulous! 1206 01:16:49,930 --> 01:16:51,680 This position requires strong muscles. 1207 01:16:51,680 --> 01:16:53,790 It is suitable for wrestlers and porters, ... 1208 01:16:53,790 --> 01:16:55,630 ... but not suitable for intellectuals. 1209 01:16:55,630 --> 01:16:59,530 Return the woman to her usual position when her color becomes abnormal, ... 1210 01:16:59,530 --> 01:17:02,100 ... or when there's a little blood coming from her nose. 1211 01:17:03,440 --> 01:17:05,180 Quiet! No applause! 1212 01:17:05,870 --> 01:17:07,360 Quiet! 1213 01:17:10,860 --> 01:17:12,320 Am I speaking Chinese?! 1214 01:17:13,710 --> 01:17:15,600 Don't make fun of me! Quiet! 1215 01:17:16,480 --> 01:17:17,850 Quiet! 1216 01:17:26,840 --> 01:17:30,670 When you write an ad, sometimes women will answer too. 1217 01:17:31,370 --> 01:17:33,200 They are not always lesbians. 1218 01:17:33,200 --> 01:17:36,460 Sometimes they are frigid and would like to find out if they're lesbians. 1219 01:17:38,650 --> 01:17:41,300 She looked at everything, ... 1220 01:17:41,400 --> 01:17:43,740 ... she touched my bed. 1221 01:17:43,840 --> 01:17:46,560 Immodestly, I showed her my breasts. 1222 01:17:47,230 --> 01:17:51,330 Have courage, I tell her. Taste this poison. 1223 01:17:55,220 --> 01:17:57,630 Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea culpa! 1224 01:17:58,350 --> 01:18:01,210 My kiss didn't help that much. 1225 01:18:01,610 --> 01:18:06,780 She was disgusted, but she tried again. 1226 01:18:06,780 --> 01:18:09,120 Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea culpa! 1227 01:18:09,310 --> 01:18:10,700 She hesitated. 1228 01:18:13,300 --> 01:18:16,170 She turned back, she looked at me... and she stopped. 1229 01:18:17,650 --> 01:18:19,190 She was searching for something. 1230 01:18:20,350 --> 01:18:21,840 She paid me. 1231 01:18:21,840 --> 01:18:23,540 And she left. 1232 01:18:23,930 --> 01:18:30,200 I immediately wrote in my notebook that heterosexuals are usually better. 1233 01:19:05,500 --> 01:19:07,560 Whip my ass! 1234 01:19:09,680 --> 01:19:13,660 This is Tarzan. But that's another story. 1235 01:19:14,360 --> 01:19:16,080 When did you make the appointment for? 1236 01:19:16,110 --> 01:19:18,540 Is he late? It's for 6 pm. 1237 01:19:18,840 --> 01:19:20,360 I still have a few minutes, then. 1238 01:19:20,460 --> 01:19:22,570 Do you know him? Is he usually on time? 1239 01:19:23,070 --> 01:19:24,980 Yes. Here he comes now! 1240 01:19:24,980 --> 01:19:27,530 He's right on time, like an American bomber! 1241 01:19:28,460 --> 01:19:29,670 Excellency! 1242 01:19:34,310 --> 01:19:35,600 You! 1243 01:19:35,760 --> 01:19:37,040 Papa?! 1244 01:19:37,500 --> 01:19:38,770 You?! 1245 01:19:39,430 --> 01:19:42,700 I'm so disgusted! 1246 01:19:42,700 --> 01:19:44,030 Papa... 1247 01:19:44,830 --> 01:19:48,320 I can't believe it! 1248 01:19:48,320 --> 01:19:50,600 Then it's true that you're a hooker! 1249 01:19:50,640 --> 01:19:53,390 Then it's true that you're a prostitute! 1250 01:19:53,390 --> 01:19:56,600 - Papa, I... - Don't ever call me that again! 1251 01:19:58,350 --> 01:19:59,700 You're disgusting! 1252 01:20:00,100 --> 01:20:01,930 You're a filthy hooker! 1253 01:20:02,030 --> 01:20:05,600 I can't understand why you've done this. 1254 01:20:05,700 --> 01:20:07,250 - Why? - Poor man... 1255 01:20:07,260 --> 01:20:10,290 - What did I ever deny you? - Poor man... 1256 01:20:10,340 --> 01:20:14,180 I sent you to study at the best schools. 1257 01:20:14,180 --> 01:20:16,200 I made sure you traveled around the world. 1258 01:20:16,200 --> 01:20:19,590 I was always there for you... 1259 01:20:19,590 --> 01:20:21,310 Where are you now? 1260 01:20:21,310 --> 01:20:23,430 In a whore-house... 1261 01:20:23,430 --> 01:20:27,080 A brothel! A brothel! 1262 01:20:27,080 --> 01:20:30,840 - With that whoring pimp! - He's right... 1263 01:20:30,960 --> 01:20:34,920 Don't deny it! She's a whore, too! 1264 01:20:34,920 --> 01:20:37,040 You bitch! 1265 01:20:39,430 --> 01:20:42,170 Diana... Diana... 1266 01:20:43,270 --> 01:20:45,170 Did I hurt you, Diana? 1267 01:20:45,270 --> 01:20:47,800 My dearest! Oh, Diana... 1268 01:20:48,000 --> 01:20:50,410 You've caused me so much suffering. 1269 01:20:51,210 --> 01:20:54,480 My God... her family is ruined! 1270 01:20:54,490 --> 01:20:57,340 I only wanted the best for you. 1271 01:20:57,640 --> 01:21:01,430 You were my little girl. I adored you... I do adore you! 1272 01:21:02,040 --> 01:21:03,500 But now... 1273 01:21:03,700 --> 01:21:07,580 Papa, forgive me! I'm still your little girl! 1274 01:21:07,670 --> 01:21:08,880 - Really? - Yes! 1275 01:21:09,720 --> 01:21:13,340 Tell your papa, was it a man who brought you here? 1276 01:21:13,740 --> 01:21:15,030 - Yes? - Yes! 1277 01:21:15,030 --> 01:21:18,030 So... you need a man! 1278 01:21:19,510 --> 01:21:21,500 You need sex! 1279 01:21:22,230 --> 01:21:24,360 Undress! Lie down! 1280 01:21:24,660 --> 01:21:27,500 - No papa! - I'll show you who's a man! 1281 01:21:27,500 --> 01:21:29,580 I'll show you! 1282 01:21:29,580 --> 01:21:32,170 Me! I'm a man! Now lie down! 1283 01:21:32,170 --> 01:21:35,020 Close that door, you bitch! 1284 01:21:35,550 --> 01:21:37,520 You're a whore, too! 1285 01:21:37,620 --> 01:21:40,690 Now you'll see who's a man! 1286 01:21:42,750 --> 01:21:44,530 Did you enjoy it? 1287 01:21:44,600 --> 01:21:46,510 It was great! Fantastic! 1288 01:21:46,610 --> 01:21:49,680 Then I hope you'll show how pleased you are. 1289 01:21:49,680 --> 01:21:51,330 Of course. 1290 01:21:51,430 --> 01:21:53,150 Is 100.000 good for you? 1291 01:21:53,300 --> 01:21:59,120 But next time I'd like to be rougher. 1292 01:21:59,120 --> 01:22:01,490 For example, when I hit you! 1293 01:22:02,830 --> 01:22:06,740 Like that. Maybe I'll change everything next time. 1294 01:22:06,740 --> 01:22:07,760 How? 1295 01:22:07,760 --> 01:22:10,700 I'd like... perhaps if I was younger... 1296 01:22:10,900 --> 01:22:12,580 I'd like to pretend to be your brother... 1297 01:22:12,590 --> 01:22:13,960 Brother and sister... 1298 01:22:14,240 --> 01:22:16,090 You're a naughty boy! 1299 01:22:16,090 --> 01:22:17,440 Just a little... yes. 1300 01:22:17,590 --> 01:22:19,090 Bye. 1301 01:22:19,090 --> 01:22:20,510 Have a good day! 1302 01:22:24,370 --> 01:22:26,350 See you next Tuesday! 1303 01:22:26,360 --> 01:22:29,020 - At 6pm, just like an American bomber! - Yes! 1304 01:22:29,500 --> 01:22:31,250 - Bye! - Bye... 1305 01:22:33,560 --> 01:22:35,090 Still... 1306 01:22:41,090 --> 01:22:46,590 What do your parents, friends and so forth, think about your thesis? 1307 01:22:47,850 --> 01:22:49,610 My father is in Africa. 1308 01:22:49,910 --> 01:22:51,350 My mother was enthusiastic, ... 1309 01:22:51,360 --> 01:22:54,340 ... but I don't think she really understood what I was doing. 1310 01:22:55,800 --> 01:23:00,360 Some of my friends were scandalized, and others were simply curious. 1311 01:23:00,870 --> 01:23:02,440 Most people approved. 1312 01:23:03,440 --> 01:23:08,160 Your... as you referred to him... fiancé... what does he think? 1313 01:23:08,240 --> 01:23:10,820 He agreed from the very beginning. 1314 01:23:12,340 --> 01:23:14,210 - Very modern? - No... a cuckold! 1315 01:23:14,210 --> 01:23:15,110 Ah... that's fair. 1316 01:23:15,400 --> 01:23:17,600 We'll get married as soon as I receive my diploma. 1317 01:23:17,800 --> 01:23:19,240 In the town hall! 1318 01:23:19,450 --> 01:23:23,830 I have gained a deep understanding of sexual problems. 1319 01:23:24,330 --> 01:23:26,020 Which I believe will make me a better wife. 1320 01:23:26,120 --> 01:23:26,940 Yeah, sure... 1321 01:23:27,140 --> 01:23:31,660 When you have sex for money, you don't care about sex at all. 1322 01:23:31,660 --> 01:23:33,980 In our society, sex is still a mystery. 1323 01:23:33,980 --> 01:23:35,140 An unsolved mystery. 1324 01:23:35,140 --> 01:23:37,190 And that is not a good thing. 1325 01:23:37,190 --> 01:23:42,500 Don't think that being a prostitute is easy. 1326 01:23:43,100 --> 01:23:44,650 You have to be good at it! 1327 01:23:44,650 --> 01:23:47,670 There are thousand things to learn to do it well. 1328 01:23:48,020 --> 01:23:49,860 And you have to take care of your health, ... 1329 01:23:49,870 --> 01:23:52,910 ... because it's an extremely tiring job. 1330 01:23:52,910 --> 01:23:54,250 Even if you're lying on your back. 1331 01:23:54,850 --> 01:23:57,390 Of course you have be careful about diseases. 1332 01:23:58,420 --> 01:24:01,040 It takes several months to become a good prostitute. 1333 01:24:01,140 --> 01:24:02,270 You need to develop sensitivity, ... 1334 01:24:02,280 --> 01:24:03,950 ... to be aware of people's needs. 1335 01:24:04,510 --> 01:24:07,560 It's important to develop good sexual techniques, ... 1336 01:24:07,660 --> 01:24:09,630 ... a reverance for sex, ... 1337 01:24:09,630 --> 01:24:10,780 ... as well as medical qualifications. 1338 01:24:11,060 --> 01:24:15,620 So, no matter where I go from here, I can always use the secret skills that I've learned. 1339 01:24:15,620 --> 01:24:16,630 Isn't that so? 1340 01:24:29,120 --> 01:24:31,810 "Let's clap our hands on her bottom. 1341 01:24:31,810 --> 01:24:35,010 Let's throw her many flowers. 1342 01:24:35,010 --> 01:24:36,680 Let's sing all together 1343 01:24:36,680 --> 01:24:38,400 she's cute, she's cute! 1344 01:24:38,400 --> 01:24:41,120 Let's touch her pussy! Hooray for the Professor! 1345 01:24:41,120 --> 01:24:44,160 Three roosters on the table 1346 01:24:44,160 --> 01:24:47,240 were having sex with doctor's daughter, 1347 01:24:47,240 --> 01:24:50,370 but the doctor's daughter was having sex with the Professor, 1348 01:24:50,370 --> 01:24:53,500 while the other teacher was with the doctor. 1349 01:24:55,010 --> 01:24:56,520 Four legs on the table, 1350 01:24:56,520 --> 01:24:59,560 the teacher has a nice ass, 1351 01:24:59,560 --> 01:25:02,560 I touch her breast, nice hard tits! 1352 01:25:02,560 --> 01:25:05,560 She has a pretty face and a cute little ass! 1353 01:25:07,140 --> 01:25:08,930 The girl is on the table. 1354 01:25:08,930 --> 01:25:11,650 I tell the teacher, go to Hell. 1355 01:25:11,650 --> 01:25:13,290 And there is progress, 1356 01:25:13,290 --> 01:25:17,790 we're having orgies in the classroom! 1357 01:25:19,240 --> 01:25:20,780 Eight legs on the table, 1358 01:25:20,780 --> 01:25:23,720 the teacher has a nice ass, 1359 01:25:23,720 --> 01:25:26,760 I touch her breast, nice hard tits! 1360 01:25:26,760 --> 01:25:29,830 She has a pretty face and a cute little ass! 1361 01:25:31,300 --> 01:25:34,510 20 books on the table, listen to this: 1362 01:25:34,510 --> 01:25:37,640 Talking about the students' life, 1363 01:25:37,640 --> 01:25:42,050 they make funny jokes! 1364 01:25:43,370 --> 01:25:44,840 Ten legs on the table, 1365 01:25:44,840 --> 01:25:47,980 the teacher has a nice ass, 1366 01:25:47,980 --> 01:25:50,800 I touch her breast, nice hard tits! 1367 01:25:50,800 --> 01:25:54,800 She has a pretty face and a cute little ass!" 1367 01:25:55,305 --> 01:26:55,604 Do you want subtitles for any video? -=[ ai.OpenSubtitles.com ]=-