"Twisted Metal" T3STDRV

1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 2 00:00:23,723 --> 00:00:26,109 You gave so much in life. 3 00:00:26,192 --> 00:00:30,514 I hope your soul's rest is perfect and peaceful, 4 00:00:30,597 --> 00:00:35,052 because your body's in for a long ride. 5 00:00:36,536 --> 00:00:39,623 If the coffin's a-rockin', don't come a-knockin'. 6 00:00:43,877 --> 00:00:45,596 Garret, wait a second. 7 00:00:45,679 --> 00:00:47,197 Why is there no casket? 8 00:00:47,280 --> 00:00:48,265 'Cause there was 9 00:00:48,348 --> 00:00:51,068 nothing left of his father to bury. 10 00:01:12,172 --> 00:01:15,241 Come join us, brother. 11 00:01:39,699 --> 00:01:41,118 Welcome. 12 00:01:41,201 --> 00:01:44,421 You'll be happy here. 13 00:01:44,504 --> 00:01:46,306 I think I like it already. 14 00:01:50,710 --> 00:01:52,696 Hi, pop. 15 00:02:31,885 --> 00:02:34,871 So Dollface has this gigantic insider guard 16 00:02:34,954 --> 00:02:35,806 in a choke hold, 17 00:02:35,889 --> 00:02:37,808 when all of a sudden I hear this loud... 18 00:02:38,892 --> 00:02:40,677 The guard is dead as hell, 19 00:02:40,760 --> 00:02:41,578 and his eyeballs 20 00:02:41,661 --> 00:02:43,413 are just dangling out of their sockets. 21 00:02:43,496 --> 00:02:46,850 Dollface is like, "guess this guy's a sailor man, 22 00:02:46,933 --> 00:02:49,286 because I just made him Popeye." 23 00:02:49,369 --> 00:02:52,256 Oh, that's fucking crazy. 24 00:02:52,339 --> 00:02:54,491 She has so many stories like that, 25 00:02:54,574 --> 00:02:55,559 and she tells them way better than me. 26 00:02:55,642 --> 00:02:58,262 You would know that if you stopped avoiding her. 27 00:02:58,345 --> 00:02:59,396 I'm not avoiding her. 28 00:02:59,479 --> 00:03:01,965 I'm just not going out of my way to interact with her. 29 00:03:02,048 --> 00:03:02,766 There's a difference. 30 00:03:02,849 --> 00:03:04,501 All right, if we're being honest, 31 00:03:04,584 --> 00:03:06,436 she's just not my cup of tea. 32 00:03:06,519 --> 00:03:07,337 You don't even know her. 33 00:03:07,420 --> 00:03:09,606 If my brother was in the car behind us, 34 00:03:09,689 --> 00:03:11,541 I sure as hell wouldn't be riding with your dumb ass. 35 00:03:11,624 --> 00:03:14,244 Family isn't just being related, okay? 36 00:03:14,327 --> 00:03:16,880 If I was a beaver, I wouldn't spend all my time 37 00:03:16,963 --> 00:03:19,349 hanging out with other big ass rodents. 38 00:03:19,432 --> 00:03:21,718 If a gator was cool, and the vibe was right, 39 00:03:21,801 --> 00:03:22,801 I'D kick it with him. 40 00:03:24,537 --> 00:03:25,789 Shit, not again. 41 00:03:25,872 --> 00:03:26,990 What? 42 00:03:27,073 --> 00:03:28,692 Oh, let's check it at the next stop. 43 00:03:28,775 --> 00:03:30,994 No. Pull over now. If something's wrong, 44 00:03:31,077 --> 00:03:32,863 you should address it right away. 45 00:03:32,946 --> 00:03:34,347 Pull over right here. 46 00:03:41,087 --> 00:03:42,873 Go talk to your sister, asshole! 47 00:03:54,968 --> 00:03:56,286 You piss her off? 48 00:03:56,369 --> 00:03:57,487 Get in. 49 00:03:57,570 --> 00:03:58,672 You, out. 50 00:04:08,381 --> 00:04:09,633 Someone need a ride? 51 00:04:09,716 --> 00:04:11,551 I told you, we're done, And I meant it. 52 00:04:17,757 --> 00:04:19,776 That's what I like about the Jeremy Express. 53 00:04:19,859 --> 00:04:22,312 It's all caboose. 54 00:04:33,006 --> 00:04:35,058 I love what you've done with the interior. 55 00:04:35,141 --> 00:04:37,294 Really shows pride of ownership. 56 00:04:37,377 --> 00:04:39,630 Still a neat freak. 57 00:04:39,713 --> 00:04:43,000 So, what was it like being back at our old house? 58 00:04:43,083 --> 00:04:45,869 Like prison, just with a lot of pizza. 59 00:04:45,952 --> 00:04:48,572 Come on, nothing in there caught your interest? 60 00:04:48,655 --> 00:04:51,575 The Baby-Sitters Club. 61 00:04:51,658 --> 00:04:53,477 Oh, shit. 62 00:04:53,560 --> 00:04:55,646 I used to love those books. -Word? 63 00:04:55,729 --> 00:04:59,416 Yeah, yeah. Ah, I had such a crush on Logan. 64 00:04:59,499 --> 00:05:00,284 Okay, so I gotta know, 65 00:05:00,367 --> 00:05:03,921 how did Abby join the BSC in book 89? 66 00:05:04,004 --> 00:05:05,422 Abby? 67 00:05:05,505 --> 00:05:06,790 Abby. Abby. 68 00:05:06,873 --> 00:05:08,058 Uh, Abby, I... 69 00:05:08,141 --> 00:05:10,694 I don't remember. 70 00:05:10,777 --> 00:05:13,830 Well, excuse me for not remembering a book, 71 00:05:13,913 --> 00:05:14,998 Mr. "I bonked my head 72 00:05:15,081 --> 00:05:16,767 and literally can't remember anything." 73 00:05:16,850 --> 00:05:18,770 Well, it's not like I'm trying not to remember. 74 00:05:20,420 --> 00:05:22,105 I'm dying. Should we make camp? 75 00:05:22,188 --> 00:05:23,874 Yeah, Ash. 76 00:05:23,957 --> 00:05:25,759 We'll head for Diesel City at first light. 77 00:05:27,527 --> 00:05:30,614 Why don't you go set up by the water tower up ahead? 78 00:05:30,697 --> 00:05:33,617 John and I are going to take a little detour. 79 00:05:33,700 --> 00:05:35,452 Detour? I don't want to take a detour. 80 00:05:35,535 --> 00:05:36,954 Shut up. You do. We're going. 81 00:05:37,037 --> 00:05:37,721 Copy that. 82 00:05:37,804 --> 00:05:38,838 Have fun, John. 83 00:05:41,775 --> 00:05:43,460 Copy that. Ashley and I 84 00:05:43,543 --> 00:05:45,979 will be scouting for food and supplies, over. 85 00:05:48,481 --> 00:05:49,566 Who knows? 86 00:05:49,649 --> 00:05:52,369 Maybe I'll get lucky, find me a muffin. 87 00:05:52,452 --> 00:05:54,020 I told you, the bakery's closed. 88 00:05:56,122 --> 00:05:57,691 Checking for bakery hours. 89 00:06:08,101 --> 00:06:10,970 Finally. Ready to fucking rock. 90 00:06:26,252 --> 00:06:30,941 ♪ Just tell me how I got this far ♪ 91 00:06:31,024 --> 00:06:34,511 ♪ Just tell me why you're here and who you are ♪ 92 00:06:34,594 --> 00:06:36,580 ♪ 'Cause every time I look ♪ 93 00:06:36,663 --> 00:06:39,516 ♪ You're never there ♪ 94 00:06:39,599 --> 00:06:41,184 ♪ And every time I sleep ♪ 95 00:06:41,267 --> 00:06:44,021 ♪ You're always there ♪ 96 00:06:44,104 --> 00:06:44,888 Here we go! 97 00:06:44,971 --> 00:06:46,089 ♪ 'Cause you're everywhere to me ♪ 98 00:06:46,172 --> 00:06:47,057 Would you shut up?! 99 00:06:58,618 --> 00:07:00,103 What the hell are you doing here? 100 00:07:00,186 --> 00:07:02,205 Covering my ears mostly. 101 00:07:02,288 --> 00:07:04,207 -That's John singing. -Yeah. 102 00:07:04,290 --> 00:07:05,725 What are you doing in my trunk?! 103 00:07:07,761 --> 00:07:11,048 You stood up for me back there. 104 00:07:11,131 --> 00:07:13,083 You... 105 00:07:13,166 --> 00:07:14,968 You saved me, Quiet. 106 00:07:17,771 --> 00:07:19,957 All right, 107 00:07:20,040 --> 00:07:21,725 I laid it on a little thick at the end there. 108 00:07:21,808 --> 00:07:23,527 Fine. Look, 109 00:07:23,610 --> 00:07:25,762 I want to enter the tournament. 110 00:07:33,920 --> 00:07:35,138 It's not funny. 111 00:07:35,221 --> 00:07:37,574 Oh, it is the way I'm picturing it. 112 00:07:37,657 --> 00:07:39,509 You'd be dead two minutes in, 113 00:07:39,592 --> 00:07:41,478 all flattened out, eyes crossed, 114 00:07:41,561 --> 00:07:44,815 tongue hanging out. -That will not be me. Okay? 115 00:07:44,898 --> 00:07:47,150 You're looking at the best driver on the West Coast. 116 00:07:47,233 --> 00:07:51,154 -No I'm not. -Yes, you are. 117 00:07:51,237 --> 00:07:54,091 -Think so? -Know so. 118 00:07:54,174 --> 00:07:55,608 Prove it. 119 00:08:01,314 --> 00:08:03,533 Wow, you don't have a goddamn clue 120 00:08:03,616 --> 00:08:04,568 what you're doing, do you? 121 00:08:04,651 --> 00:08:06,837 I am just getting my bearings. 122 00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:09,139 You know, my ex-husband's car was European. 123 00:08:09,222 --> 00:08:11,141 It was a lot cooler than this. 124 00:08:11,224 --> 00:08:12,726 All right, just put it in gear. 125 00:08:14,894 --> 00:08:16,179 Oh, my God! 126 00:08:17,263 --> 00:08:20,517 Stop, stop, stop, oh, my God. 127 00:08:20,600 --> 00:08:22,586 Why did you throw it in reverse? 128 00:08:22,669 --> 00:08:24,087 D is for drive, dumb-ass. 129 00:08:24,170 --> 00:08:25,289 What... no, I put it in drive. 130 00:08:25,372 --> 00:08:27,824 D, drive. -That's an R. 131 00:08:27,907 --> 00:08:29,593 Do you not know how to read either? 132 00:08:29,676 --> 00:08:31,528 No. Of course I can read. You're looking at 133 00:08:31,611 --> 00:08:33,664 the best reader on the West Coast. 134 00:08:33,747 --> 00:08:35,632 Okay, that's it. 135 00:08:35,715 --> 00:08:37,584 Get out. We're done. 136 00:08:40,854 --> 00:08:42,539 Ha, got you! 137 00:08:42,622 --> 00:08:44,241 Who's the dumb ass now? 138 00:08:44,324 --> 00:08:46,143 Have fun walking to Diesel City, bitch. 139 00:08:46,226 --> 00:08:48,211 Eat my diggity dust! 140 00:08:52,966 --> 00:08:54,200 Oh, shit. 141 00:08:59,739 --> 00:09:01,925 Oh, no, the dust. 142 00:09:02,008 --> 00:09:04,328 Shut up! 143 00:09:14,187 --> 00:09:16,239 Faster to go by canoe. 144 00:09:16,322 --> 00:09:18,976 You know what? Fine. Fine, whatever. 145 00:09:19,059 --> 00:09:20,944 Just wake me up when Dollface gets back. 146 00:09:21,027 --> 00:09:21,912 She'll teach me. 147 00:09:21,995 --> 00:09:23,714 Is that what you think is going to happen? 148 00:09:23,797 --> 00:09:26,750 She gives zero fucks. 149 00:09:26,833 --> 00:09:29,353 I sort of gave one teeny fuck, 150 00:09:29,436 --> 00:09:33,073 but, damn, I guess I was wrong. 151 00:09:46,186 --> 00:09:47,838 Millennium Drive-In. 152 00:09:47,921 --> 00:09:50,107 Headlights, Camera, Action. 153 00:09:50,190 --> 00:09:52,175 I don't even want to know what kind of action 154 00:09:52,258 --> 00:09:53,793 got blood all the way up there. 155 00:09:55,061 --> 00:09:56,046 Where are you going? 156 00:09:56,129 --> 00:09:58,849 We stopped here one year on the family road trip. 157 00:09:58,932 --> 00:10:01,752 Your little mind was blown by watching a movie in a car. 158 00:10:01,835 --> 00:10:03,020 You were so obsessed, 159 00:10:03,103 --> 00:10:04,788 you made Dad take us here every summer. 160 00:10:04,871 --> 00:10:06,223 Come on. -You're insane 161 00:10:06,306 --> 00:10:07,357 if you think I'm going in there. 162 00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:08,742 This shit looks haunted. 163 00:10:11,011 --> 00:10:13,030 You're still afraid of ghosts? 164 00:10:13,113 --> 00:10:14,831 Wow. 165 00:10:14,914 --> 00:10:16,366 Amnesia really is a bitch. 166 00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:17,167 You forget your whole life, 167 00:10:17,250 --> 00:10:19,085 but still remember to be a pussy. 168 00:10:21,388 --> 00:10:22,956 I'll show you a pussy! 169 00:10:24,824 --> 00:10:26,126 Hold up, wait! 170 00:10:42,742 --> 00:10:44,978 "I & K wuz here." 171 00:10:46,746 --> 00:10:48,398 This was our spot. 172 00:10:48,481 --> 00:10:51,401 Hmm. Come on, get in. 173 00:10:53,453 --> 00:10:55,105 My God, would you chill? 174 00:10:55,188 --> 00:10:59,042 There's nobody here but us. -I know that. 175 00:10:59,125 --> 00:11:00,125 Get in the car. 176 00:11:02,362 --> 00:11:03,362 Come on. 177 00:11:17,010 --> 00:11:18,862 I would try and get the projector working, 178 00:11:18,945 --> 00:11:20,197 but I'm not going in that shack. 179 00:11:20,280 --> 00:11:22,199 It's okay. We're not here for that anyway. 180 00:11:22,282 --> 00:11:24,468 I was hoping 181 00:11:24,551 --> 00:11:28,472 we could shake some memories loose. 182 00:11:28,555 --> 00:11:29,555 Maybe this will help. 183 00:11:37,497 --> 00:11:39,750 So whenever there was a car chase scene, 184 00:11:39,833 --> 00:11:41,919 Dad would let you climb over into the driver's seat 185 00:11:42,002 --> 00:11:44,354 and pretend like you were in the movie. 186 00:11:44,437 --> 00:11:48,091 And you would go crazy 187 00:11:48,174 --> 00:11:50,360 just pulling at the steering wheel, 188 00:11:50,443 --> 00:11:52,829 yelling all your little quips. 189 00:11:52,912 --> 00:11:54,798 -Dry steering? -Mm-hmm. 190 00:11:54,881 --> 00:11:55,599 You mean to tell me they would let me 191 00:11:55,682 --> 00:11:57,968 torque at the tie rods like that? 192 00:11:58,051 --> 00:12:00,237 Not to mention scuff the tires. 193 00:12:00,320 --> 00:12:02,873 So our parents really treated their vehicles like that? 194 00:12:02,956 --> 00:12:06,243 Ooh, cool your jets there, Martin Luther Keys. 195 00:12:06,326 --> 00:12:07,744 You were little. 196 00:12:07,827 --> 00:12:09,046 You couldn't do any real damage. 197 00:12:09,129 --> 00:12:11,114 But we did do a number on the upholstery though. 198 00:12:11,197 --> 00:12:13,483 Every time Mom and Dad would go to the snack shack, 199 00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:15,319 we would climb through the sunroof 200 00:12:15,402 --> 00:12:19,806 and scuff up the back seats. That would piss them off. 201 00:12:26,379 --> 00:12:27,864 What you staring at me for? 202 00:12:27,947 --> 00:12:31,234 The family whistle? 203 00:12:31,317 --> 00:12:35,105 It was Dad's way of telling us to sit our asses down. 204 00:12:35,188 --> 00:12:37,074 I swear you could hear it from miles away. 205 00:12:37,157 --> 00:12:39,209 Right, it's like when Abby's dad taught her 206 00:12:39,292 --> 00:12:41,011 how to whistle through an acorn cap. 207 00:12:41,094 --> 00:12:44,014 Would you shut up about the stupid fucking book? 208 00:12:44,097 --> 00:12:47,284 Look at me. Are you even trying to remember? 209 00:12:47,367 --> 00:12:48,885 No. I'm not. 210 00:12:48,968 --> 00:12:50,320 You want to know what it was like for me 211 00:12:50,403 --> 00:12:51,888 being in that house? 212 00:12:51,971 --> 00:12:54,157 All the pictures, all the stuff in my room, 213 00:12:54,240 --> 00:12:57,094 all the things I'm supposed to remember, but I don't. 214 00:12:57,177 --> 00:13:00,113 And then realizing if I did get my memory back... 215 00:13:02,215 --> 00:13:05,569 I'd just be weighed down by everything that I lost. 216 00:13:05,652 --> 00:13:09,840 My parents, my sister, myself. 217 00:13:09,923 --> 00:13:12,209 I'd rather just be me, be John. 218 00:13:12,292 --> 00:13:14,444 -But you're Lionel. -Lionel's dead! 219 00:13:25,939 --> 00:13:27,090 What was that? 220 00:13:27,173 --> 00:13:29,426 I don't know, you brought me here! 221 00:14:08,682 --> 00:14:10,867 What the fuck? 222 00:14:25,365 --> 00:14:27,017 What the fuck am I even looking at right now? 223 00:14:27,100 --> 00:14:28,051 I don't know, but whatever he is, 224 00:14:28,134 --> 00:14:30,153 he's not wearing a shirt, and he's fucking jacked. 225 00:14:31,037 --> 00:14:31,855 Those perfectly formed pectorials 226 00:14:31,938 --> 00:14:36,026 are basically bull's eyes. Watch this. 227 00:14:38,244 --> 00:14:40,597 Oh, I'm so sorry! 228 00:14:40,680 --> 00:14:42,966 You shot me! What the fuck? 229 00:14:43,049 --> 00:14:44,134 I'll lay down suppressive fire, 230 00:14:44,217 --> 00:14:45,002 -and you run. -Okay. 231 00:14:45,085 --> 00:14:45,569 Run! 232 00:14:48,722 --> 00:14:50,574 Goddammit! 233 00:14:52,525 --> 00:14:54,027 -In there! -Go, go, go! 234 00:14:58,531 --> 00:15:00,584 Oh, shit. 235 00:15:00,667 --> 00:15:02,920 Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh, shh. 236 00:15:14,414 --> 00:15:17,267 Oh my God, you fucking shot me. 237 00:15:17,350 --> 00:15:18,302 What the fuck? -I'm so sorry! 238 00:15:18,385 --> 00:15:20,938 Please don't cry. -I'm not gonna cry, asshole! 239 00:15:21,021 --> 00:15:23,206 -Ow, Jesus! -It's okay. Is it bad? 240 00:15:23,289 --> 00:15:25,442 Oh, shit. Uh, it's barely noticeable. 241 00:15:25,525 --> 00:15:27,010 No, no, no, 242 00:15:27,093 --> 00:15:27,678 It's not... you can't even see... 243 00:15:27,761 --> 00:15:30,147 Shh! 244 00:15:35,301 --> 00:15:36,486 Here, sew it up. Sew it up. 245 00:15:36,569 --> 00:15:37,621 I don't want a nasty scar. 246 00:15:37,704 --> 00:15:39,489 Right. 247 00:15:39,572 --> 00:15:41,258 I got this, okay. 248 00:15:41,341 --> 00:15:43,427 Come on. Have you got it? 249 00:15:43,510 --> 00:15:44,561 Yeah, I got it. 250 00:15:44,644 --> 00:15:45,429 -You got it? -Okay. Do I come from the top 251 00:15:45,512 --> 00:15:47,364 or the bottom? -You ain't got shit! 252 00:15:47,447 --> 00:15:48,365 -Okay, I... -Hold onto this. 253 00:15:48,448 --> 00:15:50,067 -Okay, okay, okay. -Make yourself useful. 254 00:15:50,150 --> 00:15:52,235 -Okay. -God. 255 00:15:52,318 --> 00:15:54,237 Oh, that's so aggressive. 256 00:15:57,590 --> 00:15:59,643 Before you even start the car, do your checks. 257 00:15:59,726 --> 00:16:03,313 Gassed up, guns loaded, mirrors clear of vultures, 258 00:16:03,396 --> 00:16:04,615 hands on the wheel at ten and two. 259 00:16:04,698 --> 00:16:06,083 No way! I wanna look cool 260 00:16:06,166 --> 00:16:08,051 when I cross the finish line. 261 00:16:08,134 --> 00:16:09,586 Okay, yeah. 262 00:16:09,669 --> 00:16:10,287 First lesson. 263 00:16:13,139 --> 00:16:14,491 You gotta outrun some vultures. 264 00:16:14,574 --> 00:16:15,492 Think fast. 265 00:16:21,214 --> 00:16:23,533 Tried to 180 out of here, and the vultures caught you. 266 00:16:23,616 --> 00:16:25,002 You're dead. 267 00:16:25,085 --> 00:16:26,353 Again. 268 00:16:30,490 --> 00:16:33,010 Wrong. 269 00:16:33,093 --> 00:16:34,093 Nope. 270 00:16:37,630 --> 00:16:39,332 Dead, dead, dead. 271 00:16:41,835 --> 00:16:43,120 Lesson two. 272 00:16:43,203 --> 00:16:44,454 Holy men dead ahead. 273 00:16:44,537 --> 00:16:45,672 Shit, shit! 274 00:16:48,308 --> 00:16:49,693 You're hanging your ass out. 275 00:16:49,776 --> 00:16:52,112 Oh, fuck! 276 00:17:03,590 --> 00:17:06,176 You were supposed to drive through the barrels. 277 00:17:06,259 --> 00:17:07,744 Guess what? You died again. 278 00:17:07,827 --> 00:17:10,047 Goddamn it. 279 00:17:10,130 --> 00:17:12,182 Time for your final exam. Drive. 280 00:17:12,265 --> 00:17:13,216 What are you doing? 281 00:17:13,299 --> 00:17:15,185 There's a killer clown 282 00:17:15,268 --> 00:17:17,354 with flaming hair right behind us. 283 00:17:17,437 --> 00:17:18,722 What's the move? -At first I... 284 00:17:18,805 --> 00:17:19,790 Go! 285 00:17:19,873 --> 00:17:21,258 You didn't even give me a chance! 286 00:17:21,341 --> 00:17:23,093 Think fast! 287 00:17:25,412 --> 00:17:27,331 You giving up? I knew it. 288 00:17:27,414 --> 00:17:28,265 I knew you weren't cut out for this. 289 00:17:28,348 --> 00:17:29,549 Fuck you, Quiet! 290 00:17:36,656 --> 00:17:39,343 I don't even want to know what nasty diseases 291 00:17:39,426 --> 00:17:42,446 you gave yourself using that dirty ass needle. 292 00:17:42,529 --> 00:17:45,282 I don't need medical advice, Dr. Piss. 293 00:17:45,365 --> 00:17:46,283 We just need to figure out 294 00:17:46,366 --> 00:17:48,252 how we're getting past those sound wave things. 295 00:17:48,335 --> 00:17:50,320 Without sexy car man knowing that we're in here. 296 00:17:50,403 --> 00:17:51,321 Well, if we're going to make it out of here, 297 00:17:51,404 --> 00:17:52,489 we're going to need a better vantage point. 298 00:17:52,572 --> 00:17:55,659 I'm going to climb to the top of the projection screen. 299 00:17:55,742 --> 00:17:56,526 No, you're not. 300 00:17:56,609 --> 00:17:58,562 We're going to the concession stand. 301 00:17:58,645 --> 00:18:00,330 Whatever's powering those sound wave thingies 302 00:18:00,413 --> 00:18:01,632 is for sure coming from there. 303 00:18:01,715 --> 00:18:03,166 Wait. 304 00:18:03,249 --> 00:18:05,335 Wait, I'm remembering something. 305 00:18:05,418 --> 00:18:07,104 -Really? -Yeah. 306 00:18:07,187 --> 00:18:08,572 -What? -I remember telling you 307 00:18:08,655 --> 00:18:10,874 it was a fucking bad idea to come in here! 308 00:18:10,957 --> 00:18:12,209 Shh! 309 00:18:12,292 --> 00:18:13,326 Do you hear that? 310 00:18:15,295 --> 00:18:18,115 It's the sound of a scared little bitch. 311 00:18:18,198 --> 00:18:19,432 Oh, wait, that's you. 312 00:19:04,244 --> 00:19:05,429 Did you see those metal hands? 313 00:19:05,512 --> 00:19:07,380 This motherfucker is full of surprises. 314 00:19:12,252 --> 00:19:14,905 I wonder how he, uh, you know, 315 00:19:14,988 --> 00:19:16,940 starts his own engine. 316 00:19:17,023 --> 00:19:18,609 Forearms on that guy? 317 00:19:18,692 --> 00:19:20,611 One wrong move, He'll rip the shit off. 318 00:19:20,694 --> 00:19:21,445 Poor son of a bitch. 319 00:19:21,528 --> 00:19:24,181 Okay, so what's the plan? 320 00:19:24,264 --> 00:19:25,749 Oh, yeah. Let's shoot our way out of here, 321 00:19:25,832 --> 00:19:27,384 because that worked so well the first time. 322 00:19:27,467 --> 00:19:28,185 It worked well for me. 323 00:19:28,268 --> 00:19:30,220 I looked fucking great. 324 00:19:30,303 --> 00:19:32,739 Ashley! Ashley! 325 00:19:35,275 --> 00:19:37,461 Oh, yes, give mama that French bread! 326 00:19:37,544 --> 00:19:40,530 It's proofing. It's proofing. 327 00:19:42,582 --> 00:19:44,268 Did you hear that? 328 00:19:56,996 --> 00:19:58,382 Come on, May, 329 00:19:58,465 --> 00:19:59,866 you can't stay back there forever. 330 00:20:02,302 --> 00:20:03,353 Fine. 331 00:20:03,436 --> 00:20:05,789 If you're not going to come out, then I'm going to eat. 332 00:20:05,872 --> 00:20:08,525 I am starving. 333 00:20:08,608 --> 00:20:10,928 Mm-mmm! 334 00:20:11,011 --> 00:20:13,964 Oh, my gosh. Oh, it's so good. 335 00:20:14,047 --> 00:20:15,849 Mmm, and I have so much of it. 336 00:20:21,888 --> 00:20:22,906 What is it? 337 00:20:22,989 --> 00:20:25,842 -Rattlesnake. -You can make snake jerky? 338 00:20:25,925 --> 00:20:27,844 Yeah. It's not that hard. 339 00:20:27,927 --> 00:20:29,579 My brother taught me how. 340 00:20:29,662 --> 00:20:31,748 Killing the fuckers is a pain in the ass. 341 00:20:31,831 --> 00:20:33,450 But then you salt them 342 00:20:33,533 --> 00:20:35,552 and put them in a salt bath 343 00:20:35,635 --> 00:20:37,588 and hang them out to dry. 344 00:20:37,671 --> 00:20:39,523 It has to be strong sunlight, though. 345 00:20:39,606 --> 00:20:40,840 I learned that the hard way. 346 00:20:43,043 --> 00:20:44,995 -What happened? -What do you think? 347 00:20:45,078 --> 00:20:46,263 I ate it raw 348 00:20:46,346 --> 00:20:48,699 and puked so hard I shit myself. 349 00:20:48,782 --> 00:20:51,001 Yeah, it was a lot of shit too, 350 00:20:51,084 --> 00:20:53,337 like, everywhere. -Ooh, that's tough. 351 00:20:53,420 --> 00:20:55,439 My brother wouldn't stop laughing, the jagoff. 352 00:20:55,522 --> 00:20:58,391 Hmm, guess being a jagoff runs in the family. 353 00:21:00,927 --> 00:21:01,927 Yeah. 354 00:21:03,863 --> 00:21:06,966 He wasn't a great teacher, but he helped me survive. 355 00:21:09,703 --> 00:21:11,538 Eventually I figured it out on my own. 356 00:21:13,840 --> 00:21:17,461 Listen, why do you want to enter this tournament so badly? 357 00:21:17,544 --> 00:21:19,730 You do know it's to the death, right? 358 00:21:19,813 --> 00:21:22,366 Yeah. So? 359 00:21:22,449 --> 00:21:24,368 I'm not afraid of dying. 360 00:21:24,451 --> 00:21:26,570 And if I win, 361 00:21:26,653 --> 00:21:28,688 I could wish for a better life. 362 00:21:33,426 --> 00:21:34,878 Come on, let's try again. 363 00:21:34,961 --> 00:21:36,880 Okay. 364 00:21:36,963 --> 00:21:38,749 Shh, shh, come on. 365 00:21:38,832 --> 00:21:39,783 Okay. 366 00:21:54,114 --> 00:21:56,049 How is this guy even alive? 367 00:22:00,553 --> 00:22:03,640 Come on. He's distracted. 368 00:22:17,037 --> 00:22:19,089 Eww. This place is a mess. 369 00:22:19,172 --> 00:22:21,391 But it's still cleaner than your car. 370 00:22:21,474 --> 00:22:23,093 Smells better too. 371 00:22:23,176 --> 00:22:24,944 Shut up and cut the power. 372 00:22:32,085 --> 00:22:34,404 "Axel." 373 00:22:39,793 --> 00:22:42,028 What kind of sick fuck would do this? 374 00:22:46,499 --> 00:22:49,086 I'd lower that pea-shooter if I were you. 375 00:22:49,169 --> 00:22:51,421 Put it on the counter. 376 00:22:51,504 --> 00:22:53,824 I'm impressed you got past my guard dog. 377 00:22:53,907 --> 00:22:55,592 Not many do. 378 00:22:55,675 --> 00:22:57,427 We're just trying to get out of here, man. 379 00:22:57,510 --> 00:22:59,396 Oh, please. You're like everyone else 380 00:22:59,479 --> 00:23:00,397 who comes sniffing around here 381 00:23:00,480 --> 00:23:02,099 trying to steal my life's work. 382 00:23:02,182 --> 00:23:03,834 You're jealous. 383 00:23:03,917 --> 00:23:05,135 Why would we be jealous of you? 384 00:23:05,218 --> 00:23:06,570 You're making car people. 385 00:23:06,653 --> 00:23:08,705 That's an oversimplification! 386 00:23:08,788 --> 00:23:11,808 I evolved that broken killer into something more. 387 00:23:11,891 --> 00:23:13,043 If the only way to survive outside 388 00:23:13,126 --> 00:23:15,579 is to be in a car, 389 00:23:15,662 --> 00:23:18,682 then what if you could be the car? 390 00:23:18,765 --> 00:23:21,451 But it's still not right. 391 00:23:21,534 --> 00:23:23,120 There's still too much human in him. 392 00:23:23,203 --> 00:23:26,723 But I could get it right with one of you. 393 00:23:26,806 --> 00:23:28,992 So what, you just make cars out of Black people? 394 00:23:29,075 --> 00:23:31,795 What? no! It's not racially motivated. 395 00:23:31,878 --> 00:23:33,597 Is that how it's coming off? -Yeah! 396 00:23:33,680 --> 00:23:35,565 I mean, you look at him, you look at us. 397 00:23:35,648 --> 00:23:36,533 Let me just say, 398 00:23:36,616 --> 00:23:39,503 I've always believed science is colorblind. 399 00:23:39,586 --> 00:23:41,672 God. 400 00:23:44,257 --> 00:23:46,510 What's going on with him? 401 00:23:47,560 --> 00:23:48,946 He's not sick, is he? 402 00:23:49,029 --> 00:23:51,148 To be honest, I have no idea what he's doing. 403 00:23:51,231 --> 00:23:52,649 Family whistle! 404 00:23:52,732 --> 00:23:54,017 The family whistle! 405 00:24:03,209 --> 00:24:05,195 Ooh. 406 00:24:05,278 --> 00:24:08,565 Some of my best friends 407 00:24:08,648 --> 00:24:09,933 are Black. 408 00:24:12,752 --> 00:24:14,705 Thanks, big bro. 409 00:24:14,788 --> 00:24:15,739 Now, if we can just get 410 00:24:15,822 --> 00:24:18,742 that tiny little butthole of a mouth to whistle. 411 00:24:18,825 --> 00:24:21,244 If my mouth is a butthole, so is yours. 412 00:24:21,327 --> 00:24:22,746 That's how genes work. 413 00:24:22,829 --> 00:24:24,269 Now, go cut the power so we can bail. 414 00:24:38,278 --> 00:24:39,229 Hey, uh, 415 00:24:39,312 --> 00:24:41,531 Axel, right? 416 00:24:41,614 --> 00:24:44,067 Listen, I know we had our differences, 417 00:24:44,150 --> 00:24:46,203 but, um, we just killed 418 00:24:46,286 --> 00:24:48,171 this little racist nerd, 419 00:24:48,254 --> 00:24:49,206 and we cut the power, 420 00:24:49,289 --> 00:24:51,708 so you're free to go. 421 00:24:51,791 --> 00:24:54,578 Now I hope we can go our separate ways peacefully. 422 00:24:54,661 --> 00:24:56,847 What?! 423 00:24:56,930 --> 00:24:59,716 We've had our differences... 424 00:24:59,799 --> 00:25:00,517 Dude, you got... 425 00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:01,952 you gotta use your big boy voice 426 00:25:02,035 --> 00:25:04,554 -What you... -We cut the power. 427 00:25:04,637 --> 00:25:05,555 You're free to go. 428 00:25:05,638 --> 00:25:07,758 Oh, good looking out. 429 00:25:07,841 --> 00:25:09,526 I hated that motherfucker. 430 00:25:09,609 --> 00:25:15,098 Peace! 431 00:25:18,785 --> 00:25:21,104 Remember, driving is about making a decision 432 00:25:21,187 --> 00:25:22,572 and making it happen. 433 00:25:22,655 --> 00:25:24,107 You second guess yourself, 434 00:25:24,190 --> 00:25:24,975 you crash and burn. 435 00:25:25,058 --> 00:25:28,278 All right, gassed up, guns loaded, 436 00:25:28,361 --> 00:25:31,114 mirrors clear of... Jeremy? 437 00:25:31,197 --> 00:25:33,717 Run! 438 00:25:33,800 --> 00:25:35,201 He's coming! 439 00:25:42,008 --> 00:25:43,560 Damn. 440 00:25:43,643 --> 00:25:44,678 Drive. 441 00:25:55,355 --> 00:25:58,008 Uh, what is he doing? 442 00:26:08,034 --> 00:26:10,988 Oh, shit! We decided to drive! D! D! 443 00:26:19,679 --> 00:26:20,631 Holy shit, I did it! 444 00:26:20,714 --> 00:26:21,798 -Celebrate later. -Right! 445 00:26:30,023 --> 00:26:33,010 Uh, what the hell is that?! 446 00:26:33,093 --> 00:26:37,247 Quiet, this wasn't on the final exam! 447 00:26:37,330 --> 00:26:38,215 Think fast! 448 00:26:50,443 --> 00:26:52,912 ] 449 00:27:02,422 --> 00:27:06,810 ♪ 'Cause you're everywhere to me ♪ 450 00:27:06,893 --> 00:27:11,315 ♪ When I close my eyes it's you I see ♪ 451 00:27:11,398 --> 00:27:16,787 ♪ And everything I know that makes me believe ♪ 452 00:27:16,870 --> 00:27:21,925 ♪ I'm not alo-whoa-whoa-one ♪ 453 00:27:22,008 --> 00:27:26,196 ♪ 'Cause you're everything to me ♪ 454 00:27:26,279 --> 00:27:31,101 ♪ And when I close me eyes It's you I see ♪ 455 00:27:31,184 --> 00:27:36,707 ♪ You're everything I know that makes me believe ♪ 456 00:27:36,790 --> 00:27:40,811 ♪ I'm not alo-whoa-whoa-one ♪ 457 00:27:40,894 --> 00:27:43,013 When we win I was thinking maybe 458 00:27:43,096 --> 00:27:45,415 I'd take Quiet up to grandpa's cabin. 459 00:27:45,498 --> 00:27:47,417 Oh. The cabin. 460 00:27:47,500 --> 00:27:49,853 You know that brings back some memories. 461 00:27:49,936 --> 00:27:52,155 Wait, how are you gonna remember Grandpa cabin 462 00:27:52,238 --> 00:27:53,890 and not Grandpa? 463 00:27:53,973 --> 00:27:56,976 I might have found a way there. 464 00:28:00,413 --> 00:28:02,332 -Hey, I drew this. -Yeah. 465 00:28:05,085 --> 00:28:06,837 Bitch, you read my diary? 466 00:28:06,920 --> 00:28:08,338 What? No, I wouldn't... 467 00:28:08,421 --> 00:28:10,474 Yeah. Okay, just a little bit. 468 00:28:10,557 --> 00:28:11,842 Look, I got tired of hearing about horses 469 00:28:11,925 --> 00:28:14,211 and how funny Brian Carroll was. 470 00:28:14,294 --> 00:28:16,046 Ooh, funny and fine. 471 00:28:16,129 --> 00:28:16,947 Ugh. 472 00:28:17,030 --> 00:28:18,882 No third grader could resist his charms. 473 00:28:18,965 --> 00:28:20,900 Oh, well. 474 00:28:22,535 --> 00:28:24,221 Look who decided to show up. 475 00:28:24,304 --> 00:28:25,722 Why is the kid driving? 476 00:28:25,805 --> 00:28:26,757 Why is your face all fucked up? 477 00:28:26,840 --> 00:28:29,326 We just had a run in with the grim douche bag 478 00:28:29,409 --> 00:28:30,994 and a naked man on wheels. 479 00:28:31,077 --> 00:28:32,829 Axel! 480 00:28:32,912 --> 00:28:34,331 Ashley and Jeremy are dead. 481 00:28:34,414 --> 00:28:35,933 They're real fucking dead. 482 00:28:36,016 --> 00:28:36,833 And we're going to be next 483 00:28:36,916 --> 00:28:38,135 if we don't get the fuck out of here. 484 00:28:38,218 --> 00:28:40,370 Shit. Okay, we should load up. 485 00:28:40,453 --> 00:28:41,988 -I'll ride with you. -Okay. 486 00:28:46,126 --> 00:28:48,812 -So the detour worked, huh? -It did. 487 00:28:48,895 --> 00:28:50,847 Thank you for making that happen. 488 00:28:50,930 --> 00:28:52,249 You're high, aren't you? 489 00:28:52,332 --> 00:28:53,900 Indubitab-ably. 490 00:29:02,142 --> 00:29:04,795 Ash and Jeremy weren't the best soldiers, 491 00:29:04,878 --> 00:29:07,147 but their hearts were committed to the cause. 492 00:29:09,149 --> 00:29:12,952 May their souls bang for eternity. 493 00:29:23,463 --> 00:29:25,349 Why didn't she bury the mask? 494 00:29:25,432 --> 00:29:27,184 The mission lives on. 495 00:29:27,267 --> 00:29:29,286 It'll go to the next doll worthy of wearing it. 496 00:29:29,369 --> 00:29:30,087 Hmm. 497 00:29:30,170 --> 00:29:30,721 Well, you know, when you go down, 498 00:29:30,804 --> 00:29:32,923 I'll keep your mask alive. 499 00:29:33,006 --> 00:29:34,825 -Oh, that's so nice. -Yeah. 500 00:29:34,908 --> 00:29:35,659 Knowing your driving, 501 00:29:35,742 --> 00:29:37,142 it'll probably be you that kills me. 502 00:29:51,324 --> 00:29:52,376 Diesel City, 503 00:29:52,459 --> 00:29:55,846 where the biggest, scariest, loudest special weapons 504 00:29:55,929 --> 00:29:57,080 are made and sold. 505 00:29:57,163 --> 00:29:58,915 That's cool, but we don't have any money. 506 00:29:58,998 --> 00:30:01,218 We don't need money, 507 00:30:01,301 --> 00:30:03,937 because we're going to steal them. 508 00:30:19,252 --> 00:30:20,871 This is my kind of party! 509 00:30:20,954 --> 00:30:23,006 Welcome to my contest. 510 00:30:23,089 --> 00:30:25,442 What are you up to, you long-haired fuck? 511 00:30:25,525 --> 00:30:27,311 You'll compete in multiple rounds, 512 00:30:27,394 --> 00:30:30,113 each unique and more deadly than the last. 513 00:30:30,196 --> 00:30:32,249 Where in the fuck do you think you're going? 514 00:30:32,332 --> 00:30:34,918 If you survive, you advance. 515 00:30:35,001 --> 00:30:36,887 There's a lot of stone-cold killers here. 516 00:30:36,970 --> 00:30:38,889 -Hi, Sweet Tooth. -Ah! 517 00:30:38,972 --> 00:30:40,557 Grimm, how the hell did you get out? 518 00:30:40,640 --> 00:30:42,559 I got a special invitation. 519 00:30:42,642 --> 00:30:43,961 The last driver behind the wheel 520 00:30:44,044 --> 00:30:44,928 gets their wish granted. 521 00:30:46,946 --> 00:30:47,898 We're taking them all down. 522 00:30:47,981 --> 00:30:49,032 ♪ Bash it up Bash it up ♪ 523 00:30:49,115 --> 00:30:49,900 ♪ Bash it up ♪ 524 00:30:49,983 --> 00:30:50,867 ♪ Bash it up ♪ 525 00:30:50,950 --> 00:30:52,002 ♪ Hey ♪ 526 00:30:52,085 --> 00:30:53,136 ♪ Man you're talkin' back to me ♪ 527 00:30:53,219 --> 00:30:54,304 Go, go, go, go, go! Fuck! 528 00:30:54,387 --> 00:30:55,172 ♪ Take him out ♪ 529 00:30:55,255 --> 00:30:57,040 I'm worried what it'll take to win. 530 00:30:57,123 --> 00:30:59,910 You make a run at me, I will end you. 531 00:30:59,993 --> 00:31:01,311 Coroner gonna list your cause of death 532 00:31:01,394 --> 00:31:02,346 as everything. 533 00:31:02,429 --> 00:31:05,349 It's time for the tournament to begin! 534 00:31:05,432 --> 00:31:06,316 John! 535 00:31:09,269 --> 00:31:11,288 Do you think we'll win? 536 00:31:11,371 --> 00:31:13,190 -♪ Come out and play ♪ -Get some! 537 00:31:13,273 --> 00:31:16,460 Welcome to Twisted Metal! 537 00:31:17,305 --> 00:32:17,404