"Our Miss Brooks" Trying to Pick a Fight

1 00:00:00,292 --> 00:00:07,299 Stop daydreaming, Connie. 2 00:00:11,887 --> 00:00:13,639 You'll be late for school. 3 00:00:13,764 --> 00:00:15,933 Connie, wake up. 4 00:00:16,058 --> 00:00:17,684 Who are you? 5 00:00:17,809 --> 00:00:20,437 Well, I'm not Bridie Murphy. 6 00:00:20,562 --> 00:00:21,146 Good. 7 00:00:21,271 --> 00:00:23,315 Then you're still in this world. 8 00:00:23,440 --> 00:00:25,275 I'm not so sure, Mrs. Davis. 9 00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:27,361 I had the most vivid dream last night. 10 00:00:27,486 --> 00:00:29,112 I can't get it out of my head. 11 00:00:29,238 --> 00:00:32,366 I didn't think you had such exciting memories. 12 00:00:32,491 --> 00:00:34,284 When did all this take place? 13 00:00:34,409 --> 00:00:35,535 In October 1952. 14 00:00:35,661 --> 00:00:38,997 I was still teaching at Madison then, and we 15 00:00:39,122 --> 00:00:43,252 were living in your house on Carroll Avenue. 16 00:00:43,377 --> 00:00:45,003 The day started very simply. 17 00:00:45,128 --> 00:00:47,673 You were fixing breakfast for me that morning. 18 00:00:47,798 --> 00:00:50,509 Connie! 19 00:00:50,634 --> 00:00:52,469 Oh, Connie, are you awake? 20 00:00:52,594 --> 00:00:55,097 No, I'm not, Mrs. Davis. 21 00:00:55,222 --> 00:00:56,181 Well, it's getting late. 22 00:00:56,306 --> 00:00:57,641 You've got to get dressed. 23 00:00:57,766 --> 00:00:59,601 Oh, I'm all dressed. 24 00:00:59,726 --> 00:01:00,936 I'm just not awake yet. 25 00:01:01,061 --> 00:01:02,854 Well, you'd better hurry, dear. 26 00:01:02,980 --> 00:01:05,941 Your food is getting cold. 27 00:01:08,068 --> 00:01:13,156 Now then, where'd I put the coffee? 28 00:01:13,282 --> 00:01:14,408 Oh, I know. 29 00:01:14,533 --> 00:01:17,703 It's in the percolator. 30 00:01:17,828 --> 00:01:18,787 Now then, let's see what else. 31 00:01:18,912 --> 00:01:19,955 Oh, the toast. 32 00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:20,831 Oh, Connie! 33 00:01:20,956 --> 00:01:22,582 What kind of toast do you want? 34 00:01:22,708 --> 00:01:24,668 White or rye? 35 00:01:24,793 --> 00:01:28,505 Rye! 36 00:01:28,630 --> 00:01:30,007 Oh, my goodness. 37 00:01:30,132 --> 00:01:31,383 You startled me so, dear. 38 00:01:31,508 --> 00:01:33,510 I didn't hear you come in. 39 00:01:33,635 --> 00:01:36,555 Thank you for keeping my tomato juice warm, Mrs. Davis. 40 00:01:36,680 --> 00:01:39,433 Oh, you're welcome, dear. 41 00:01:39,558 --> 00:01:41,518 How'd you sleep last night? 42 00:01:41,643 --> 00:01:43,186 Pretty well, thanks. 43 00:01:43,312 --> 00:01:45,605 I had a dream about Mr. Boynton. 44 00:01:45,731 --> 00:01:47,107 What happened? 45 00:01:47,232 --> 00:01:49,651 Like always, nothing. 46 00:01:50,819 --> 00:01:55,449 You know, I can't understand that man, and him a biology teacher. 47 00:01:55,574 --> 00:02:00,329 There's a big difference between teaching it and learning it, I guess. 48 00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:03,332 How long have you two known each other, anyway? 49 00:02:03,457 --> 00:02:04,416 Let's see. 50 00:02:04,541 --> 00:02:08,253 We started dating the week he got his pet frog, McDougal. 51 00:02:08,378 --> 00:02:09,755 That was over four years ago. 52 00:02:09,880 --> 00:02:14,051 You mean that you've been going steady for the past four years? 53 00:02:14,176 --> 00:02:15,802 That's right, Mrs. Davis. 54 00:02:15,927 --> 00:02:22,642 I've been going steady with Mr. Boynton, and he's been going steady with McDougal. 55 00:02:22,768 --> 00:02:24,144 I'll get it. 56 00:02:26,104 --> 00:02:28,482 Oh, that must be Walter Denton to take me to school. 57 00:02:28,607 --> 00:02:30,442 Come on in, Walter. 58 00:02:30,567 --> 00:02:34,863 I hope he's had the top put up on that popped-up jalopy of his. 59 00:02:34,988 --> 00:02:38,200 Salutations, fair damsel. 60 00:02:38,325 --> 00:02:38,825 Good morning, Walter. 61 00:02:38,950 --> 00:02:41,203 Oh, it's more than a good morning, Miss Brooks. 62 00:02:41,328 --> 00:02:42,746 It is a glorious morning. 63 00:02:42,871 --> 00:02:45,290 An appetizingly delicious morning. 64 00:02:45,415 --> 00:02:47,125 Yeah, well, don't wrap it up. 65 00:02:47,250 --> 00:02:48,251 I'll eat it here. 66 00:02:48,377 --> 00:02:50,295 Sit down, Walter. 67 00:02:50,420 --> 00:02:51,880 Oh, thank you. 68 00:02:52,005 --> 00:02:53,423 You still eating breakfast? 69 00:02:53,548 --> 00:02:53,590 Uh-huh. 70 00:02:53,715 --> 00:02:55,717 Yeah, I had my breakfast an hour ago. 71 00:02:55,842 --> 00:02:58,136 Oh, that's too bad. 72 00:02:58,261 --> 00:03:00,722 I thought I might fix you a few waffles, dear. 73 00:03:00,847 --> 00:03:02,391 Oh, no thanks. 74 00:03:02,516 --> 00:03:04,726 No, I couldn't eat any waffles, Mrs. Davis. 75 00:03:04,851 --> 00:03:08,230 Just a few eggs and some sausage and toast will be plenty. 76 00:03:08,355 --> 00:03:09,314 All right, dear. 77 00:03:09,439 --> 00:03:11,274 I'll fix you up in a jiffy. 78 00:03:11,400 --> 00:03:13,443 Gee, I feel wonderful today. 79 00:03:13,568 --> 00:03:15,237 You know, I'm so happy I can hardly eat. 80 00:03:15,362 --> 00:03:17,155 Would you pass the jelly, please? 81 00:03:17,280 --> 00:03:20,450 You really are walking on the ceiling this morning, Walter. 82 00:03:20,575 --> 00:03:22,577 What's the source of all this gaiety? 83 00:03:22,702 --> 00:03:25,455 Oh, the source is Harriet Conklin, Miss Brooks. 84 00:03:25,580 --> 00:03:27,249 I'm crazy about her. 85 00:03:27,374 --> 00:03:28,792 And what a fight we had yesterday. 86 00:03:28,917 --> 00:03:31,211 We almost came to blows. 87 00:03:31,336 --> 00:03:31,753 I see. 88 00:03:31,878 --> 00:03:34,756 You're crazy about her, so you almost came to blows, huh? 89 00:03:34,881 --> 00:03:38,176 Well, you see, a person can't take another person for granted. 90 00:03:38,301 --> 00:03:43,098 If he or she is clobbering, his or her brain's out. 91 00:03:43,223 --> 00:03:44,099 Clobbering? 92 00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:45,350 Don't you get it? 93 00:03:45,475 --> 00:03:46,935 No, I didn't. 94 00:03:49,187 --> 00:03:53,525 Well, you see, the more bitter the babble, the sweeter it is making up. 95 00:03:53,650 --> 00:03:56,528 You mean you actually pick fights just so you can make up later? 96 00:03:56,653 --> 00:03:59,197 You should have heard the name she called me. 97 00:03:59,322 --> 00:04:00,740 Harriet called you name? 98 00:04:00,866 --> 00:04:03,618 Yeah, well, she was just quoting her father. 99 00:04:03,743 --> 00:04:08,290 Our beloved principal hates me, you know. 100 00:04:08,415 --> 00:04:10,417 Mr. Conklin doesn't hate anyone, Walter. 101 00:04:10,542 --> 00:04:11,668 He just looks that way. 102 00:04:11,793 --> 00:04:15,088 Well, you see, Miss Brooks, a good fight once in a 103 00:04:15,213 --> 00:04:18,967 while tends to make couples less sure of each other. 104 00:04:19,092 --> 00:04:22,846 I think it'd help a lot if you had a good battle with Mr. Boynton. 105 00:04:22,971 --> 00:04:24,806 If I'm not getting too personal. 106 00:04:24,931 --> 00:04:26,850 You're getting too personal. 107 00:04:26,975 --> 00:04:30,353 Oh, honestly, Walter, I never heard such adolescent gibberish. 108 00:04:30,479 --> 00:04:31,354 Now, if you'll excuse me. 109 00:04:31,480 --> 00:04:34,608 Yeah, but you gotta do something to stir him up or he'll never make a move. 110 00:04:34,733 --> 00:04:38,445 Please, Walter, I don't care to discuss it. 111 00:04:38,570 --> 00:04:40,697 Mrs. Davis, I just had a wonderful idea. 112 00:04:40,822 --> 00:04:44,493 I'm going to pick a fight with Mr. Boynton. 113 00:04:44,618 --> 00:04:46,161 You'll what? 114 00:04:46,286 --> 00:04:49,623 Well, if I don't stir him up some way, he'll never make a move. 115 00:04:49,748 --> 00:04:51,708 But if I can get him into a good, lively 116 00:04:51,833 --> 00:04:54,169 battle, think of the fun we'll have making up. 117 00:04:54,294 --> 00:04:56,004 Sounds like a wonderful idea. 118 00:04:56,129 --> 00:04:57,380 When are you going to try it, Connie? 119 00:04:57,506 --> 00:04:58,256 At noon today. 120 00:04:58,381 --> 00:05:00,884 I have a date with him in the school cafeteria. 121 00:05:01,009 --> 00:05:04,012 But remember, Mrs. Davis, this is absolutely confidential. 122 00:05:04,137 --> 00:05:06,515 I don't want you to mention it to a soul. 123 00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:09,935 Oh, you can trust me, Connie. 124 00:05:16,566 --> 00:05:23,573 Dear Scott Porter, Miss Brooks is going to pick a fight with Mr. Boykin. 125 00:05:25,784 --> 00:05:32,290 Mr. Conklin, I was just on my way to the cafeteria. 126 00:05:32,415 --> 00:05:34,334 I'm sure that you were, Miss Brooks. 127 00:05:34,459 --> 00:05:37,837 However, may I remind you that you are traversing the hallway 128 00:05:37,963 --> 00:05:41,424 of a public high school, not the cinder path of the Coliseum. 129 00:05:43,051 --> 00:05:43,635 I'll slow down, sir. 130 00:05:43,760 --> 00:05:46,012 Before you go, there's something I want to talk to you about. 131 00:05:46,137 --> 00:05:53,144 Would you mind loping into my office for a moment? 132 00:05:54,646 --> 00:05:56,398 But sir, I... In you go. 133 00:05:56,523 --> 00:06:01,945 With you in here, I'd better remove my glasses. 134 00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:04,406 You've broken two pair already this term. 135 00:06:04,531 --> 00:06:09,327 Oh, I'm sorry about that, Mr. Conklin, but it was purely an accident both times. 136 00:06:09,452 --> 00:06:12,289 It was also an accident when you dropped the typewriter on my foot. 137 00:06:12,414 --> 00:06:17,711 When you rammed your cafeteria tray into the back of my head. 138 00:06:17,836 --> 00:06:20,297 Those were deplorable incidents, Mr. Conklin, 139 00:06:20,422 --> 00:06:22,924 and I must say you were wonderful about them. 140 00:06:23,049 --> 00:06:27,762 By considering your blood pressure, sir, I think you acted with admirable restraint. 141 00:06:27,887 --> 00:06:30,932 But then that's because you are such a big man, Mr. Conklin. 142 00:06:31,057 --> 00:06:32,726 Not big, Miss Brooks. 143 00:06:32,851 --> 00:06:34,352 Just swollen. 144 00:06:38,398 --> 00:06:41,818 However, the reason I called you in here was to issue an order. 145 00:06:41,943 --> 00:06:44,988 Effective immediately, you are to keep my daughter 146 00:06:45,113 --> 00:06:48,700 Harriet away from that lame-brained dunce, Walter Denton. 147 00:06:48,825 --> 00:06:51,911 Oh, Walter isn't always so lame-brained, Mr. Conklin. 148 00:06:52,037 --> 00:06:54,831 Sometimes he's a very intelligent dunce. 149 00:06:54,956 --> 00:06:58,043 I mean, I wouldn't worry about the kids if I were you. 150 00:06:58,168 --> 00:07:00,337 With Walter, it's just puppy love. 151 00:07:00,462 --> 00:07:01,713 Puppy love, eh? 152 00:07:01,838 --> 00:07:08,053 If I could be sure of that, I'd build him a kennel with my own hands. 153 00:07:08,178 --> 00:07:11,014 You should have heard them on our front porch last night, Miss Brooks. 154 00:07:11,139 --> 00:07:14,434 For three hours, they were cooing and gurgling 155 00:07:14,559 --> 00:07:18,146 at each other like a brace of punch-drunk doves. 156 00:07:20,523 --> 00:07:22,859 They were just making up after a little spat. 157 00:07:22,984 --> 00:07:25,445 You see, sir, there's nothing quite as sweet 158 00:07:25,570 --> 00:07:28,239 as the reconciliation after a lover's quarrel. 159 00:07:28,365 --> 00:07:31,618 Why, many couples pick fights just for the fun of making up. 160 00:07:31,743 --> 00:07:36,373 What repugnant theatrics! 161 00:07:36,498 --> 00:07:39,125 Although, now that you mention it, Harriet's 162 00:07:39,250 --> 00:07:42,337 mother once started an argument like that with me. 163 00:07:42,462 --> 00:07:46,925 To stir up some emotional activity, she said. 164 00:07:47,050 --> 00:07:51,680 Come to think of it, when we did make up, it was rather wonderful. 165 00:07:51,805 --> 00:07:58,645 Yes, yes, indeed. 166 00:07:58,770 --> 00:07:59,979 Yes, yes, indeed. 167 00:08:00,105 --> 00:08:00,563 Yes, yes, indeed. 168 00:08:00,689 --> 00:08:01,231 Yes, yes, indeed. 169 00:08:01,356 --> 00:08:02,607 Yes, yes, indeed. 170 00:08:02,732 --> 00:08:03,650 Yes, yes, indeed. 171 00:08:03,775 --> 00:08:04,317 Yes, yes, indeed. 172 00:08:04,442 --> 00:08:05,318 Yes, yes, indeed. 173 00:08:05,443 --> 00:08:05,944 Yes, yes, indeed. 174 00:08:06,069 --> 00:08:06,611 Yes, yes, indeed. 175 00:08:06,736 --> 00:08:07,195 Yes, yes, indeed. 176 00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:08,071 Yes, yes, indeed. 177 00:08:08,196 --> 00:08:12,117 Yes, yes, indeed. 178 00:08:12,242 --> 00:08:12,492 Yes, yes, indeed. 179 00:08:12,617 --> 00:08:12,826 Yes, yes, indeed. 180 00:08:12,951 --> 00:08:13,201 Yes, yes, indeed. 181 00:08:13,326 --> 00:08:13,576 Yes, yes, indeed. 182 00:08:13,702 --> 00:08:13,910 Yes, yes, indeed. 183 00:08:14,035 --> 00:08:14,285 Yes, yes, indeed. 184 00:08:14,411 --> 00:08:14,661 Yes, yes, indeed. 185 00:08:14,786 --> 00:08:14,994 Yes, yes, indeed. 186 00:08:15,120 --> 00:08:15,370 Yes, yes, indeed. 187 00:08:15,495 --> 00:08:15,704 Yes, yes, indeed. 188 00:08:15,829 --> 00:08:16,079 Yes, yes, indeed. 189 00:08:16,204 --> 00:08:16,454 Yes, yes, indeed. 190 00:08:16,579 --> 00:08:16,788 Yes, yes, indeed. 191 00:08:16,913 --> 00:08:17,163 Yes, yes, indeed. 192 00:08:17,288 --> 00:08:17,539 Yes, yes, indeed. 193 00:08:17,664 --> 00:08:17,872 Yes, yes, indeed. 194 00:08:17,997 --> 00:08:18,248 Yes, yes, indeed. 195 00:08:18,373 --> 00:08:18,623 Yes, yes, indeed. 196 00:08:18,748 --> 00:08:18,957 Yes, yes, indeed. 197 00:08:19,082 --> 00:08:19,332 Yes, yes, indeed. 198 00:08:19,457 --> 00:08:19,708 Yes, yes, indeed. 199 00:08:19,833 --> 00:08:20,041 Yes, yes, indeed. 200 00:08:20,166 --> 00:08:20,417 Yes, yes, indeed. 201 00:08:20,542 --> 00:08:20,834 Yes, yes, indeed. 202 00:08:20,959 --> 00:08:21,126 Yes, 203 00:08:21,251 --> 00:08:28,258 Miss Brooks, I should like it very much if you would leave my office. 204 00:08:30,385 --> 00:08:32,971 But, sir, that ink, wouldn't you like a blotter? 205 00:08:33,096 --> 00:08:34,889 No. 206 00:08:35,014 --> 00:08:38,268 Can't I take you to the laundry? 207 00:08:38,393 --> 00:08:42,689 If you are not out of this office by the time I count three. 208 00:08:42,814 --> 00:08:49,821 I shall absolutely shred you! 209 00:08:52,615 --> 00:08:58,705 Oh, excuse me, Mr. Critch! 210 00:08:58,830 --> 00:09:01,291 And don't slam that door! 211 00:09:01,416 --> 00:09:02,709 Hello, Mr. Barnhill. 212 00:09:02,834 --> 00:09:05,462 Oh, hello, Miss Brooks. 213 00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:09,132 You're looking well today, I'll bet. 214 00:09:09,257 --> 00:09:13,636 I've been holding this table for us. 215 00:09:13,762 --> 00:09:15,305 It's right near the food counter. 216 00:09:15,430 --> 00:09:18,767 Well, if you're going to be sarcastic just because I happen to 217 00:09:18,892 --> 00:09:23,188 be two or three minutes late, perhaps I'd better sit by myself. 218 00:09:23,313 --> 00:09:24,898 I wasn't being sarcastic, Miss Brooks. 219 00:09:25,023 --> 00:09:26,357 I just said... There you go. 220 00:09:26,483 --> 00:09:27,525 You just said. 221 00:09:27,650 --> 00:09:30,487 I don't suppose you're at all interested in what I might have to say. 222 00:09:30,612 --> 00:09:32,864 Of course I am, Miss Brooks. 223 00:09:32,989 --> 00:09:35,158 What have you got to say? 224 00:09:35,283 --> 00:09:36,284 I forget. 225 00:09:39,037 --> 00:09:41,706 What made you sit so close to the steam table? 226 00:09:41,831 --> 00:09:44,000 You always like to be near the food, Miss Brooks. 227 00:09:44,125 --> 00:09:45,043 Oh, that's right. 228 00:09:45,168 --> 00:09:48,463 Call me a glutton. 229 00:09:48,588 --> 00:09:53,259 The next thing you'll be saying is that I stuff myself so I'm getting fat as a horse. 230 00:09:53,384 --> 00:09:55,512 I wouldn't say anything like that. 231 00:09:55,637 --> 00:09:59,641 You might be getting a little bit plump. 232 00:09:59,766 --> 00:10:00,266 Dad! 233 00:10:00,391 --> 00:10:02,936 Hey, what's the matter with you today, anyway? 234 00:10:03,061 --> 00:10:05,313 Oh, of course, blame it all on me. 235 00:10:05,438 --> 00:10:07,732 I come in here prepared to have a perfectly friendly 236 00:10:07,857 --> 00:10:09,901 lunch and immediately you begin picking on me. 237 00:10:10,026 --> 00:10:12,403 I don't know how you can say a thing like that. 238 00:10:12,529 --> 00:10:15,907 You mean you don't know how a person in her right mind could say a thing like that. 239 00:10:16,032 --> 00:10:20,453 That's what you really mean, isn't it? 240 00:10:20,578 --> 00:10:21,955 Oh, I get it now. 241 00:10:22,080 --> 00:10:23,289 This is a rib. 242 00:10:23,414 --> 00:10:26,417 Say, you sure had me going for a minute there. 243 00:10:26,543 --> 00:10:29,921 I may have to bite him. 244 00:10:30,046 --> 00:10:31,881 This is no rib, Mr. Barton. 245 00:10:32,006 --> 00:10:35,468 I don't feel the... Excuse me, folks, but I have an important message for Miss Brooks. 246 00:10:35,593 --> 00:10:38,680 Mr. Conklin wants to see you in his office rather immediately. 247 00:10:38,805 --> 00:10:39,889 How immediately? 248 00:10:40,014 --> 00:10:47,021 Well, if memory serves me correctly, his exact words were, on the double. 249 00:10:47,146 --> 00:10:49,190 It's a shame you have to go now, Miss Brooks, 250 00:10:49,315 --> 00:10:51,109 while you haven't had anything to eat. 251 00:10:51,234 --> 00:10:52,861 Oh, tell you what. 252 00:10:52,986 --> 00:10:55,113 Why don't you have a few of these jelly beans? 253 00:10:55,238 --> 00:10:56,322 Jelly beans? 254 00:10:56,447 --> 00:10:57,198 Yes. 255 00:10:57,323 --> 00:10:59,284 I carry them with me all the time. 256 00:10:59,409 --> 00:11:01,578 The dextrose contained in them is one of the 257 00:11:01,703 --> 00:11:04,080 best sources of quick energy known to science. 258 00:11:04,205 --> 00:11:05,373 Here, take a few. 259 00:11:05,498 --> 00:11:07,208 Sweets to the sweet, they say. 260 00:11:07,333 --> 00:11:12,380 That is the last insult I will take from you today. 261 00:11:12,505 --> 00:11:13,381 Insult? 262 00:11:13,506 --> 00:11:16,009 Pardon me for interrupting, Mr. Boynton, but as manager of 263 00:11:16,134 --> 00:11:18,845 the track team, I called a special practice for after school. 264 00:11:18,970 --> 00:11:21,264 Well, for your information, Denton, I'm coach of the track 265 00:11:21,389 --> 00:11:23,558 team and I'm the only one entitled to call a practice. 266 00:11:23,683 --> 00:11:25,643 Gee whiz, Mr. Boynton, you have to get so upset. 267 00:11:25,768 --> 00:11:26,936 Don't tell me what to do! 268 00:11:27,061 --> 00:11:30,315 I'm not strict enough with you kids, that's the trouble! 269 00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:33,109 Well, sure you are! 270 00:11:33,234 --> 00:11:33,484 And I am not! 271 00:11:33,610 --> 00:11:34,485 Oh, great! 272 00:11:34,611 --> 00:11:40,450 With him, it's... Yes, Miss Brooks, I did. 273 00:11:40,575 --> 00:11:44,579 I wanted to report to you the result of my adopting your suggestion. 274 00:11:44,704 --> 00:11:45,622 My suggestion? 275 00:11:45,747 --> 00:11:46,247 Yes. 276 00:11:46,372 --> 00:11:49,375 Yes, acting on your conversational tip of a few moments ago, 277 00:11:49,500 --> 00:11:52,503 I called my wife, Martha, and started an argument with her. 278 00:11:52,629 --> 00:11:53,755 Really, Mr. Councilor? 279 00:11:53,880 --> 00:11:55,298 Do you think it worked? 280 00:11:55,423 --> 00:11:55,882 I... 281 00:11:56,007 --> 00:11:57,258 Think it did? 282 00:11:57,383 --> 00:12:00,887 Yes. 283 00:12:01,012 --> 00:12:01,763 Miss Brooks? 284 00:12:01,888 --> 00:12:02,680 Yes? 285 00:12:02,805 --> 00:12:04,974 Martha has left me! 286 00:12:07,852 --> 00:12:07,977 Left you? 287 00:12:08,102 --> 00:12:08,811 How do you know? 288 00:12:08,937 --> 00:12:11,606 Well, I thought I'd gone at it a bit strongly on my 289 00:12:11,731 --> 00:12:14,692 first call, so after a few moments I rang my home again. 290 00:12:14,817 --> 00:12:15,026 And? 291 00:12:15,151 --> 00:12:18,237 The housekeeper informed me that Mrs. Conklin had left the house with the police. 292 00:12:18,363 --> 00:12:19,113 With the police? 293 00:12:19,238 --> 00:12:21,032 Same thing happened the last time we quarreled. 294 00:12:21,157 --> 00:12:24,744 She took off for her mother's home in Montrose like a wounded buffalo. 295 00:12:24,869 --> 00:12:27,372 Now, if you'll stay in my office, Miss Brooks, 296 00:12:27,497 --> 00:12:30,249 I'll try to head her off at the railroad station. 297 00:12:30,375 --> 00:12:33,002 But, sir, my classes... Put my daughter Harriet in charge as monitor. 298 00:12:33,127 --> 00:12:34,545 You must stay here till I get back. 299 00:12:34,671 --> 00:12:37,799 Well, I'm terribly sorry it worked out like this, Mr. Conklin, 300 00:12:37,924 --> 00:12:40,677 but I must say you're showing remarkable self-control. 301 00:12:40,802 --> 00:12:41,970 Thank you. 302 00:12:42,095 --> 00:12:44,514 There's no time for recrimination now. 303 00:12:44,639 --> 00:12:51,646 However, upon my return to this institution, I shall absolutely swan you! 304 00:12:52,772 --> 00:12:55,858 Please don't swan me! 305 00:12:55,984 --> 00:12:57,360 Bad door. 306 00:12:57,485 --> 00:13:04,492 Principal's office. 307 00:13:11,499 --> 00:13:13,918 Constance Brooks, acting principal speaking. 308 00:13:14,043 --> 00:13:15,294 Oh, hello, Miss Brooks. 309 00:13:15,420 --> 00:13:16,504 This is Mrs. Conklin. 310 00:13:16,629 --> 00:13:17,463 Mrs. Conklin? 311 00:13:17,588 --> 00:13:20,091 Just a moment, please. 312 00:13:22,468 --> 00:13:23,845 Hello, Mrs. Conklin. 313 00:13:23,970 --> 00:13:25,304 How are you? 314 00:13:25,430 --> 00:13:26,055 Where are you? 315 00:13:26,180 --> 00:13:28,141 Oh, I'm at the luggage shop, Miss Brooks. 316 00:13:28,266 --> 00:13:30,226 I'm having one of my balises repaired. 317 00:13:30,351 --> 00:13:32,687 Would you call Mr. Conklin to the phone, please? 318 00:13:32,812 --> 00:13:35,273 I'm afraid my voice isn't loud enough for that. 319 00:13:35,398 --> 00:13:37,734 He's at the railroad station. 320 00:13:37,859 --> 00:13:39,235 The railroad station? 321 00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:40,361 What's he doing there? 322 00:13:40,486 --> 00:13:43,740 Well, he thought you were peeved at him, so when your housekeeper said 323 00:13:43,865 --> 00:13:47,201 you'd left with the valise, he presumed something drastic had happened. 324 00:13:47,326 --> 00:13:48,077 Drastic? 325 00:13:48,202 --> 00:13:52,999 Like the time you were wounded in Buffalo. 326 00:13:54,125 --> 00:13:54,333 What? 327 00:13:54,459 --> 00:13:58,337 He thinks you're on your way to your mother's house in Montrose. 328 00:13:58,463 --> 00:14:01,924 I feel very much to blame for this whole thing, Mrs. Conklin, because 329 00:14:02,050 --> 00:14:05,470 I suggested that a good quarrel now and then was very stimulating. 330 00:14:06,554 --> 00:14:08,389 You're so right, Miss Brooks. 331 00:14:08,514 --> 00:14:11,726 A little emotional activity is good for any family. 332 00:14:11,851 --> 00:14:15,855 Why, even the bees have to stop making honey once in a while. 333 00:14:15,980 --> 00:14:21,736 Yes, but I started the activity in the wrong hives. 334 00:14:21,861 --> 00:14:25,406 However, I don't think it's a bad idea to let Mr. Conklin 335 00:14:25,531 --> 00:14:28,785 cool his heels in that railroad station for a while. 336 00:14:28,910 --> 00:14:30,787 That's just what I'll do. 337 00:14:30,912 --> 00:14:33,998 Say, Miss Brooks, why don't you drop by the house after school? 338 00:14:34,123 --> 00:14:36,375 We'll have a nice little bull session. 339 00:14:36,501 --> 00:14:39,921 Oh, he won't be back by then. 340 00:14:40,046 --> 00:14:41,631 That is, I'd love to, Mrs. Conklin. 341 00:14:41,756 --> 00:14:42,131 Thank you. 342 00:14:42,256 --> 00:14:43,633 See you this afternoon, then. 343 00:14:43,758 --> 00:14:44,258 Goodbye. 344 00:14:44,383 --> 00:14:45,968 Goodbye. 345 00:14:47,303 --> 00:14:49,138 Miss Brooks, I'm surprised at you. 346 00:14:49,263 --> 00:14:50,556 Mr. Boynton! 347 00:14:50,681 --> 00:14:52,767 I came in to see Mr. Conklin, and I couldn't help 348 00:14:52,892 --> 00:14:54,977 overhearing your conversation with Mrs. Conklin. 349 00:14:55,103 --> 00:15:00,024 Well, I'd like one of those deli beans now, Mr. Boynton. 350 00:15:00,149 --> 00:15:03,820 Frankly, I never dreamed you'd be a party to such a nefarious plot. 351 00:15:03,945 --> 00:15:08,116 For the first time in our association, Miss Brooks, I'm genuinely angry at you! 352 00:15:08,241 --> 00:15:09,158 You are? 353 00:15:09,283 --> 00:15:10,868 I certainly am! 354 00:15:10,993 --> 00:15:17,083 Well... You want to make something of it, Frog Boy? 355 00:15:23,214 --> 00:15:24,507 Frog Boy? 356 00:15:24,632 --> 00:15:30,304 Why don't you leap down to the pond and dunk your head under a lily pad? 357 00:15:30,429 --> 00:15:35,351 So, you've been spying on me after school? 358 00:15:35,476 --> 00:15:39,647 Ah, your father's Bunsen burner. 359 00:15:39,772 --> 00:15:42,817 When I think of our principal wandering around the railroad 360 00:15:42,942 --> 00:15:46,445 station searching vainly for a wife who isn't there, I'm appalled. 361 00:15:46,571 --> 00:15:48,573 Poor Mr. Conklin must be beside himself. 362 00:15:48,698 --> 00:15:53,953 Please, Mr. Boynton, not even Mr. Conklin could stand another Mr. Conklin. 363 00:15:54,078 --> 00:15:55,329 Your levity leaves me cold. 364 00:15:55,454 --> 00:15:56,581 Good day, Miss Brooks. 365 00:15:56,706 --> 00:16:01,002 Good day, Mr. Boynton. 366 00:16:01,127 --> 00:16:02,420 I'm worried, Miss Brooks. 367 00:16:02,545 --> 00:16:03,504 It's after 9 p.m. 368 00:16:03,629 --> 00:16:05,339 and still no word from Osgood. 369 00:16:05,464 --> 00:16:07,133 Maybe something's happened to him. 370 00:16:07,258 --> 00:16:09,886 It isn't like Daddy to be gone this long without calling. 371 00:16:10,011 --> 00:16:12,597 Oh, I'm sure he'll turn up at any minute, Harriet. 372 00:16:12,722 --> 00:16:15,892 You know the story of the proverbial bad penny. 373 00:16:16,017 --> 00:16:19,770 Now I guess I shouldn't tell that one now. 374 00:16:19,896 --> 00:16:22,481 But we must look on the bright side of things. 375 00:16:22,607 --> 00:16:24,942 I suppose you're right, Miss Brooks. 376 00:16:25,067 --> 00:16:26,235 Would you like some more coffee? 377 00:16:26,360 --> 00:16:27,195 No thanks, Harriet. 378 00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:31,073 I never drink more than 14 cups. 379 00:16:31,199 --> 00:16:32,867 How about you, Mr. Boynton? 380 00:16:32,992 --> 00:16:33,993 No thank you. 381 00:16:34,118 --> 00:16:37,371 I can't help thinking about that story in the papers the other day, 382 00:16:37,496 --> 00:16:41,417 about the college professor who was found wandering around with amnesia. 383 00:16:41,542 --> 00:16:43,753 His wife had left him, too. 384 00:16:43,878 --> 00:16:45,671 But I didn't leave your father, Harriet. 385 00:16:45,796 --> 00:16:47,089 He only thought I did. 386 00:16:47,215 --> 00:16:50,676 If only Daddy hadn't taken Walter Denton's car to drive to the station. 387 00:16:50,801 --> 00:16:54,222 Walter can hardly control that hopped-up jalopy himself. 388 00:16:54,347 --> 00:16:56,182 Oh, this is dreadful. 389 00:16:56,307 --> 00:16:58,226 Maybe I'll never see him again. 390 00:16:58,351 --> 00:17:00,937 Oh, now take it easy, Mrs. Conklin. 391 00:17:01,062 --> 00:17:02,939 How can I take it easy? 392 00:17:03,064 --> 00:17:10,821 How would you feel if you thought you were never going to see Osgood again? 393 00:17:10,947 --> 00:17:15,076 Maybe I will have another go. 394 00:17:16,410 --> 00:17:19,121 I'm sure everything will turn out fine, Mrs. Conklin. 395 00:17:19,247 --> 00:17:20,998 How can you say that, Mr. Boynton? 396 00:17:21,123 --> 00:17:22,416 The man's missing, isn't he? 397 00:17:22,541 --> 00:17:26,170 You heard about the professor who wandered off with amnesia. 398 00:17:26,295 --> 00:17:27,964 Why should Mr. Conklin have amnesia? 399 00:17:28,089 --> 00:17:29,632 Why shouldn't he? 400 00:17:29,757 --> 00:17:32,802 Now, please don't you two start quarreling. 401 00:17:32,927 --> 00:17:35,554 We already have quarreled. 402 00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:36,222 I'll get it. 403 00:17:36,347 --> 00:17:39,183 Maybe it's all good. 404 00:17:39,308 --> 00:17:40,559 Oh, Walter, come in. 405 00:17:40,685 --> 00:17:41,435 Good evening. 406 00:17:41,560 --> 00:17:42,687 Hi, Walter. 407 00:17:42,812 --> 00:17:43,688 Good evening, Miss Brooks. 408 00:17:43,813 --> 00:17:44,689 Good evening, Harriet. 409 00:17:44,814 --> 00:17:45,773 Good evening, Mr. Boyden. 410 00:17:45,898 --> 00:17:49,235 You can call the roll later, Walter. 411 00:17:49,360 --> 00:17:50,111 What's the news? 412 00:17:50,236 --> 00:17:52,863 Well, I checked the emergency hospitals and the receiving 413 00:17:52,989 --> 00:17:55,283 hospital, and I just this minute left the morgue. 414 00:17:55,408 --> 00:17:56,742 And? 415 00:17:56,867 --> 00:17:57,868 No luck. 416 00:18:00,705 --> 00:18:02,581 But I did something else, though, that may get us some action. 417 00:18:02,707 --> 00:18:03,499 What's that, Walter? 418 00:18:03,624 --> 00:18:04,875 Well, I called the police department. 419 00:18:05,001 --> 00:18:06,711 You mean the Bureau of Missing Persons? 420 00:18:06,836 --> 00:18:08,546 Oh, no, ma'am, the police department. 421 00:18:08,671 --> 00:18:10,715 I told them I wanted to report a stolen car. 422 00:18:10,840 --> 00:18:12,675 What? 423 00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:14,885 But Daddy didn't steal your car. 424 00:18:15,011 --> 00:18:16,470 No, I know it, Harriet, but... 425 00:18:16,595 --> 00:18:22,059 Supposing your dad met with, forgive the expression, foul play. 426 00:18:22,184 --> 00:18:25,479 Well, then there's always an outside chance that 427 00:18:25,604 --> 00:18:29,066 he might be found with whatever's left of the car. 428 00:18:29,191 --> 00:18:33,988 Oh, I'm sure we're all exaggerating the sinister side of Mr. Conklin's absence. 429 00:18:34,113 --> 00:18:36,282 There must be something we can do besides just sit here. 430 00:18:36,407 --> 00:18:39,410 Well, we could all try to be a little more cheerful. 431 00:18:39,535 --> 00:18:42,455 Oh, Osgood, I miss you so. 432 00:18:42,580 --> 00:18:46,792 My, he looks just like he was alive. 433 00:18:46,917 --> 00:18:50,004 The phone, maybe it's news. 434 00:18:51,088 --> 00:18:51,339 Hello? 435 00:18:51,464 --> 00:18:53,424 Long distance? 436 00:18:53,549 --> 00:18:54,050 Montrose? 437 00:18:54,175 --> 00:18:56,385 Yes, I'll accept the call. 438 00:18:56,510 --> 00:18:56,761 Hello? 439 00:18:56,886 --> 00:18:58,721 What's that? 440 00:18:59,972 --> 00:19:01,474 Osgood was what? 441 00:19:01,599 --> 00:19:08,606 He was. 442 00:19:10,024 --> 00:19:10,066 He did. 443 00:19:10,191 --> 00:19:10,274 He didn't. 444 00:19:10,399 --> 00:19:10,441 He has. 445 00:19:10,566 --> 00:19:10,691 He has been. 446 00:19:10,816 --> 00:19:10,983 He might have. 447 00:19:11,108 --> 00:19:13,152 Well, thank you so much for calling, Mother. 448 00:19:13,277 --> 00:19:13,694 Goodbye. 449 00:19:13,819 --> 00:19:16,739 It was Grandma from Montrose. 450 00:19:16,864 --> 00:19:18,157 It was Grandma from Montrose. 451 00:19:18,282 --> 00:19:23,371 It was Grandma from Montrose. 452 00:19:23,496 --> 00:19:26,415 She said that Osgood drove down there late this afternoon looking for me. 453 00:19:26,540 --> 00:19:28,292 Why, that's great. 454 00:19:28,417 --> 00:19:29,919 Well, what's great about it, Mr. Boynton? 455 00:19:30,044 --> 00:19:31,712 We still don't know where he is. 456 00:19:31,837 --> 00:19:36,217 Well, we may not know where he is, but at least we know where he's been. 457 00:19:36,342 --> 00:19:38,344 There was an awful storm in Montrose. 458 00:19:38,469 --> 00:19:41,347 Mother said it was raining cats and dogs when Osgood left. 459 00:19:41,472 --> 00:19:43,682 And Walter's car hasn't any top. 460 00:19:43,808 --> 00:19:44,642 Poor Daddy. 461 00:19:44,767 --> 00:19:48,938 Even if nothing else has happened to him, he'll probably be half drowned. 462 00:19:49,063 --> 00:19:50,856 It's raining here now, too. 463 00:19:50,981 --> 00:19:56,862 Yeah, it's really coming down. 464 00:19:56,987 --> 00:19:59,573 Walter will be just furious when he does get back. 465 00:19:59,698 --> 00:20:01,534 But I'll make it up to him. 466 00:20:01,659 --> 00:20:04,245 I'm afraid he'll make it up to me, too. 467 00:20:04,370 --> 00:20:09,083 Well, I hate to drink and run, but I think I'd better be paddling on home. 468 00:20:09,208 --> 00:20:10,876 I'll drive you if you like. 469 00:20:11,001 --> 00:20:12,420 I like! 470 00:20:12,545 --> 00:20:13,212 Goodbye, Miss Brooke. 471 00:20:13,337 --> 00:20:13,963 Goodbye, kid. 472 00:20:14,088 --> 00:20:21,762 We'll see you in school. 473 00:20:21,887 --> 00:20:25,266 Does this bird live here? 474 00:20:25,391 --> 00:20:27,101 Of course this bird lives here. 475 00:20:27,226 --> 00:20:28,936 This is my husband, officer. 476 00:20:29,061 --> 00:20:31,939 But does he always drive hot cars around town? 477 00:20:32,064 --> 00:20:34,233 I told you it was not a hot car. 478 00:20:34,358 --> 00:20:36,360 I borrowed it from one of my pupils. 479 00:20:36,485 --> 00:20:38,446 That one, to be exact! 480 00:20:38,571 --> 00:20:40,781 Yeah, sure, I lent it to him this afternoon. 481 00:20:40,906 --> 00:20:42,908 This is all a misunderstanding, officer. 482 00:20:43,033 --> 00:20:43,367 See? 483 00:20:43,492 --> 00:20:46,287 You overzealous minion of the law. 484 00:20:46,412 --> 00:20:48,831 Oh, please accept our apology, officer. 485 00:20:48,956 --> 00:20:51,000 He's been through enough. 486 00:20:51,125 --> 00:20:55,129 Well, I... I suppose it's all right. 487 00:20:55,254 --> 00:20:57,548 But you better watch that dialogue, Doc. 488 00:20:57,673 --> 00:21:04,680 Over a zealous minion. 489 00:21:06,515 --> 00:21:10,019 Well, here we are all happily reunited. 490 00:21:10,144 --> 00:21:16,108 May I take your hat, Mr. Conklin? 491 00:21:22,698 --> 00:21:25,618 Thank you. 492 00:21:27,828 --> 00:21:30,915 Thank you. 493 00:21:31,040 --> 00:21:36,295 You've already done so much for me, I could break every bone in your chest! 494 00:21:36,420 --> 00:21:36,420 Osgood! 495 00:21:36,545 --> 00:21:38,672 Please, dear, remember your blood pressure. 496 00:21:38,797 --> 00:21:42,009 Now I'll fix you a toddy and get your warm rolls out. 497 00:21:42,134 --> 00:21:45,888 Remember, we've got some making up to do, sugar cookie. 498 00:21:46,013 --> 00:21:51,685 Yes, you have, Mr. Conklin, and that's really the best part. 499 00:21:51,810 --> 00:21:52,394 Oh, shut up! 500 00:21:52,520 --> 00:21:53,145 All the ridiculous action I know! 501 00:21:53,270 --> 00:21:57,274 Please, Osgood, I know you're upset, dear. 502 00:21:57,399 --> 00:21:59,902 But you mustn't raise your voice in the presence of others. 503 00:22:00,027 --> 00:22:00,945 You're right. 504 00:22:01,070 --> 00:22:03,113 I mustn't raise my voice in the presence of others. 505 00:22:03,239 --> 00:22:06,742 Now say goodnight to everyone and jump into a nice hot tub. 506 00:22:06,867 --> 00:22:07,952 Very well. 507 00:22:08,077 --> 00:22:15,042 Goodnight everyone, and jump into a nice hot tub! 508 00:22:16,669 --> 00:22:19,255 I'm so glad Daddy's home safely. 509 00:22:19,380 --> 00:22:20,839 Yeah, me too, Harriet. 510 00:22:20,965 --> 00:22:24,635 You know, we got some making up of our own to do, sugar cookie. 511 00:22:24,760 --> 00:22:25,678 All right, Walter. 512 00:22:25,803 --> 00:22:27,805 Let's go to the balcony of the State Theater. 513 00:22:27,930 --> 00:22:31,225 We've seen the picture there. 514 00:22:32,560 --> 00:22:33,352 Excuse us, folks. 515 00:22:33,477 --> 00:22:36,272 We haven't made up since yesterday. 516 00:22:36,397 --> 00:22:38,065 Well, good night and have a nice time. 517 00:22:38,190 --> 00:22:39,275 Yeah, we'll sure try. 518 00:22:39,400 --> 00:22:41,485 See you tomorrow. 519 00:22:42,861 --> 00:22:45,906 Well, that leaves just you and me, Mr. Brighton. 520 00:22:46,031 --> 00:22:49,076 Shall we go to our corners and come out making up? 521 00:22:49,201 --> 00:22:52,913 I guess I did act a bit stuffy today, Miss Brooks. 522 00:22:53,038 --> 00:22:56,125 Well, there's not much I can say. 523 00:22:56,250 --> 00:23:00,087 In a situation like this, actions speak louder than words. 524 00:23:00,212 --> 00:23:02,923 What have you got in mind, Mr. Boyden? 525 00:23:03,048 --> 00:23:05,634 Miss Brooks, pucker up. 526 00:23:05,759 --> 00:23:08,053 Yes, Mr. Boyden. 527 00:23:08,178 --> 00:23:09,680 Now close your eyes. 528 00:23:09,805 --> 00:23:14,268 Not me, I want to watch. 529 00:23:14,393 --> 00:23:15,019 Please. 530 00:23:15,144 --> 00:23:21,525 All right, Mr. Boynton. 531 00:23:21,650 --> 00:23:21,734 There. 532 00:23:21,859 --> 00:23:23,444 How was that, Miss Brooks? 533 00:23:23,569 --> 00:23:25,487 Wonderful, Mr. Boynton. 534 00:23:25,613 --> 00:23:31,994 The purple ones have always been my favorite jellybeans. 535 00:23:33,912 --> 00:23:35,873 It ended all right, Mrs. Davis. 536 00:23:35,998 --> 00:23:39,293 But honestly, if that Walter Denton gets any more 537 00:23:39,418 --> 00:23:43,172 ideas and fights, I wish he'd keep them to himself. 538 00:23:43,297 --> 00:23:45,049 Now, who can that be at this hour? 539 00:23:45,174 --> 00:23:45,799 Hello? 540 00:23:45,924 --> 00:23:47,384 Hello, Miss Brooks. 541 00:23:47,509 --> 00:23:49,887 I wouldn't call you this late, but I don't want 542 00:23:50,012 --> 00:23:52,473 to disturb Daddy anymore, and Walter's in jail. 543 00:23:52,598 --> 00:23:54,600 In jail? 544 00:23:54,725 --> 00:23:55,517 Yes. 545 00:23:55,643 --> 00:23:58,520 On our way home from the movies, two policemen stopped 546 00:23:58,646 --> 00:24:01,231 us and arrested Walter for driving a stolen car. 547 00:24:01,357 --> 00:24:01,774 What? 548 00:24:01,899 --> 00:24:04,526 If when I left them Walter was having a terrible fight 549 00:24:04,652 --> 00:24:07,363 with a police sergeant, what should I do, Miss Brooks? 550 00:24:07,488 --> 00:24:08,489 Let them fight. 551 00:24:08,614 --> 00:24:14,912 Think of the fun they'll have making up in the morning.