"Our Miss Brooks" Madison Country Club

1 00:00:00,042 --> 00:00:07,049 The. 2 00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:15,074 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 3 00:00:18,894 --> 00:00:20,395 The. 4 00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:24,191 Principal Osgood Compton of Madison High School and Jason Brill of Clay High, long arch rivals, 5 00:00:24,316 --> 00:00:28,111 recently petitioned the Board of Education for funds to renovate their administrative offices. 6 00:00:31,698 --> 00:00:33,408 These petitions were rejected. 7 00:00:33,533 --> 00:00:36,954 Yesterday, however, the student body and faculty at Clay City rallied 8 00:00:37,079 --> 00:00:40,582 behind Mr. Brill and took up a collection which netted almost $300. 9 00:00:40,707 --> 00:00:42,834 Well, what do you know? 10 00:00:42,960 --> 00:00:44,753 This act constitutes one of the finest 11 00:00:44,878 --> 00:00:47,339 spontaneous tributes ever accorded to a principal. 12 00:00:47,464 --> 00:00:49,967 Congratulations, Jason Brill. 13 00:00:50,092 --> 00:00:52,094 And now, a word about our product. 14 00:00:52,219 --> 00:00:54,012 Does your salt flow freely? 15 00:00:54,137 --> 00:00:55,013 Well, I don't know. 16 00:00:55,138 --> 00:00:58,809 I never gave it much thought. 17 00:00:58,934 --> 00:00:59,601 Try it. 18 00:00:59,726 --> 00:01:01,645 See for yourself. 19 00:01:03,397 --> 00:01:06,483 Doesn't flow at all. 20 00:01:06,608 --> 00:01:08,777 Perhaps your salt is not weatherproof. 21 00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:09,987 Could be. 22 00:01:10,112 --> 00:01:13,657 But it might be a faulty shaker. 23 00:01:13,782 --> 00:01:17,786 Just listen to what Mrs. Lucy Philpott has to say on this subject. 24 00:01:17,911 --> 00:01:22,708 I've been using a faulty shaker for nigh on to 40 years. 25 00:01:22,833 --> 00:01:25,002 My shaker seems pretty good. 26 00:01:25,127 --> 00:01:26,878 Then maybe it's your salt. 27 00:01:27,004 --> 00:01:31,591 Fortunately, scientists have now discovered an amazing new substitute for salt. 28 00:01:31,717 --> 00:01:32,467 What is it? 29 00:01:32,592 --> 00:01:33,593 Pepper. 30 00:01:34,720 --> 00:01:36,305 Hand it over, Mrs. Davis. 31 00:01:36,430 --> 00:01:40,350 Here you are, Mrs. Philpott. 32 00:01:40,475 --> 00:01:42,894 Thank you, Don Wilson. 33 00:01:43,020 --> 00:01:44,521 Oh, good morning, dear. 34 00:01:44,646 --> 00:01:45,147 Morning. 35 00:01:45,272 --> 00:01:47,024 Oh, Connie. 36 00:01:47,149 --> 00:01:51,361 They just had something over the radio about Clay High School. 37 00:01:51,486 --> 00:01:53,864 Oh, I had the flash yesterday, Mrs. Davis. 38 00:01:53,989 --> 00:01:57,993 They collected $300 to refurnish the office of their principal. 39 00:01:58,118 --> 00:02:03,582 A noble gesture, which has our beloved principal blowing his beloved top. 40 00:02:03,707 --> 00:02:04,875 That's toast. 41 00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:07,002 Or a swine mark if you prefer it. 42 00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:09,796 I prefer to think it's toast. 43 00:02:09,921 --> 00:02:13,592 Repercussions were rather swift at Madison yesterday, Mrs. Davis. 44 00:02:13,717 --> 00:02:17,095 One hour after we heard the news about Jason Brill, a collection 45 00:02:17,220 --> 00:02:20,849 box marked the Osgood-Conklin Fund had been set up in the hall. 46 00:02:20,974 --> 00:02:21,933 By whom? 47 00:02:22,059 --> 00:02:25,604 By Osgood-Conklin, whom else? 48 00:02:25,729 --> 00:02:27,731 He wants me to drop by this morning and give 49 00:02:27,856 --> 00:02:29,858 him some ideas for refurnishing his office. 50 00:02:29,983 --> 00:02:32,944 I couldn't help but feel sorry for him last night, Connie. 51 00:02:33,070 --> 00:02:36,573 You know, I was over at the counselor's playing bridge, and the poor man... 52 00:02:36,698 --> 00:02:40,077 Well, I was very uncomfortable about some remarks that Mrs. Smith made. 53 00:02:42,829 --> 00:02:43,830 Who's Mrs. Smith? 54 00:02:43,955 --> 00:02:45,123 Mrs. Kendall Smith. 55 00:02:45,248 --> 00:02:48,960 She's the most rude person I ever met, Connie. 56 00:02:49,086 --> 00:02:54,341 All she talked about was how smartly the faculty at Play High dresses. 57 00:02:54,466 --> 00:02:58,720 She said that by comparison, you teachers at Madison dress like hobos. 58 00:02:58,845 --> 00:03:02,099 What did he say when Mr. Conklin sprang to our defense? 59 00:03:02,224 --> 00:03:05,477 Well, he didn't exactly spring to your defense, Connie. 60 00:03:05,602 --> 00:03:06,353 What did he do? 61 00:03:06,478 --> 00:03:07,521 He agreed with her. 62 00:03:07,646 --> 00:03:11,066 In fact, he invited her to come over to his office so that she could 63 00:03:11,191 --> 00:03:14,611 get a close-up of what he termed his frowzy, flea-bitten faculty. 64 00:03:18,865 --> 00:03:22,869 Well, if we're bitten, he's the flea that did it. 65 00:03:22,994 --> 00:03:25,914 Mrs. Smith, indeed. 66 00:03:26,039 --> 00:03:26,957 Oh, there's Walter Denton. 67 00:03:27,082 --> 00:03:27,916 Come on in, Walter. 68 00:03:28,041 --> 00:03:29,793 I better fix some more eggs, Donny. 69 00:03:29,918 --> 00:03:31,169 Only fix six, Mrs. Davis. 70 00:03:31,294 --> 00:03:33,588 He may not be hungry. 71 00:03:33,713 --> 00:03:34,589 Good morning, Miss Brooks. 72 00:03:34,714 --> 00:03:36,133 Your chariot elates without. 73 00:03:36,258 --> 00:03:36,967 Good morning, Walter. 74 00:03:37,092 --> 00:03:38,760 Mrs. Davis is fixing you a bite. 75 00:03:38,885 --> 00:03:39,719 Don't you want to sit down? 76 00:03:39,845 --> 00:03:41,304 Yeah, thanks. 77 00:03:41,430 --> 00:03:43,432 Now, how come you're not dressed yet? 78 00:03:43,557 --> 00:03:45,892 Well, I can't get dressed till Mrs. Davis comes out. 79 00:03:46,017 --> 00:03:48,186 She has the key to my wardrobe closet, and when 80 00:03:48,311 --> 00:03:50,564 I woke up this morning, I found she'd locked it. 81 00:03:50,689 --> 00:03:52,441 Well, why should she lock your closet? 82 00:03:52,566 --> 00:03:54,443 Oh, it's just an idiosyncrasy. 83 00:03:54,568 --> 00:03:59,865 She's afraid some nearsighted moth might get in there and die of starvation. 84 00:03:59,990 --> 00:04:03,368 You know, Walter, sometimes I think it'd be wonderful to have money. 85 00:04:03,493 --> 00:04:04,369 Yeah. 86 00:04:04,494 --> 00:04:08,331 Hey, don't you wish you'd wake up some morning and find out you're Jason Brill? 87 00:04:08,457 --> 00:04:08,957 Oh, I don't know. 88 00:04:09,082 --> 00:04:12,919 I'd have a tough time explaining it to Mr. Boynton. 89 00:04:13,044 --> 00:04:15,714 Did he notice the difference? 90 00:04:15,839 --> 00:04:19,134 No, I mean, don't you wish you fell into $600 like he did? 91 00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:20,635 You mean $300, don't you? 92 00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:22,179 No, I mean $600. 93 00:04:22,304 --> 00:04:25,515 Harriet Conklin told me there's a mysterious angle to this case. 94 00:04:25,640 --> 00:04:29,478 As I understand the story, I... I... 95 00:04:29,603 --> 00:04:31,897 This is toast. 96 00:04:32,022 --> 00:04:35,192 Or a discus, if you're athletic. 97 00:04:35,317 --> 00:04:36,943 What's the mysterious angle? 98 00:04:37,068 --> 00:04:40,322 Well, some anonymous philanthropist was so touched by the way the folks at 99 00:04:40,447 --> 00:04:44,075 Clay High had scraped up $300 for their principal that he donated another $300. 100 00:04:46,036 --> 00:04:49,873 I only hope for our sakes that the Osgoode-Conklin Fund does as well. 101 00:04:49,998 --> 00:04:51,416 Oh, I'm sure it will, Miss Brooks. 102 00:04:51,541 --> 00:04:55,170 Why, I could hardly wait to get to the collection box after school yesterday. 103 00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:58,173 Of course, I waited until Mr. Conklin himself had dropped 104 00:04:58,298 --> 00:05:01,051 some money into the box to sort of get things rolling. 105 00:05:01,176 --> 00:05:02,761 How much did you contribute? 106 00:05:02,886 --> 00:05:05,430 Well, I followed Mr. Conklin's suggestion to the letter. 107 00:05:05,555 --> 00:05:08,642 He said that the contributions of all students and teachers should be 108 00:05:08,767 --> 00:05:12,562 commensurate with the degree of admiration and affection that they hold for him. 109 00:05:14,981 --> 00:05:17,275 How much did you put in the collection? 110 00:05:17,400 --> 00:05:19,486 I took out a dime. 111 00:05:20,779 --> 00:05:26,451 Walter, how could you take money out of a collection box? 112 00:05:26,576 --> 00:05:26,993 Easy. 113 00:05:27,118 --> 00:05:29,704 I got skinny fingers. 114 00:05:29,829 --> 00:05:30,705 You know what I mean. 115 00:05:30,830 --> 00:05:31,873 Why did you do it? 116 00:05:31,998 --> 00:05:34,000 Oh, I needed a pint of cash. 117 00:05:34,125 --> 00:05:35,418 Don't worry, Miss Brooks. 118 00:05:35,544 --> 00:05:37,462 I'm going to replace the dime. 119 00:05:37,587 --> 00:05:38,672 Good morning, Walter. 120 00:05:38,797 --> 00:05:41,383 We're fresh out of bed, so I brought you some dry cereal. 121 00:05:41,508 --> 00:05:43,009 And you'll find milk in the fridge over here. 122 00:05:43,134 --> 00:05:46,263 Oh, thanks, Mrs. Davis, but I'd rather have my cereal straight. 123 00:05:46,388 --> 00:05:48,848 I can't stand the racket it makes. 124 00:05:48,974 --> 00:05:51,810 Maybe the cat would like that milk, Mrs. Davis. 125 00:05:51,935 --> 00:05:53,395 Where is Minerva this morning? 126 00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:55,564 Oh, I forgot to tell you, Connie. 127 00:05:55,689 --> 00:05:58,191 I took her to the cat hospital about an hour ago. 128 00:05:58,316 --> 00:06:02,279 The poor thing was coughing and meowing something fierce. 129 00:06:02,404 --> 00:06:03,572 Oh, I didn't know she was ill. 130 00:06:03,697 --> 00:06:04,781 It's nothing serious. 131 00:06:04,906 --> 00:06:06,116 She'll be back in a few days. 132 00:06:06,241 --> 00:06:07,409 What was she coughing about? 133 00:06:07,534 --> 00:06:13,039 She swallowed the key to your wardrobe closet. 134 00:06:13,164 --> 00:06:17,586 Mrs. Davis, I've got to get to school, and all my clothes are in that closet. 135 00:06:17,711 --> 00:06:19,629 I'll have a locksmith over a little later. 136 00:06:19,754 --> 00:06:23,466 Meanwhile, you can wear one of my dresses to school. 137 00:06:23,592 --> 00:06:24,968 That should look cute. 138 00:06:25,093 --> 00:06:26,761 There's nothing to kid about, Walter. 139 00:06:26,886 --> 00:06:28,388 Today of all days. 140 00:06:28,513 --> 00:06:31,141 Suppose that obnoxious Mrs. Smith drops in and finds me in 141 00:06:31,266 --> 00:06:33,977 an ill-fitting dress... Don't worry about the fit, Connie. 142 00:06:34,102 --> 00:06:36,730 You know how handy I am with needle and thread. 143 00:06:36,855 --> 00:06:40,108 Why, in just a jiffy, I can let it out a little here and a little there 144 00:06:40,233 --> 00:06:43,820 and... Here a little, there a little, our Miss Brooks ain't got no clothes. 145 00:06:45,196 --> 00:06:50,827 E-I-E-I-O! 146 00:06:50,952 --> 00:06:58,084 Good morning, Mr. Conklin. 147 00:06:58,209 --> 00:07:03,256 Sorry, madam, I gave my old papers to the Salvation Army. 148 00:07:03,381 --> 00:07:05,759 It's me, Mr. Conklin, Miss Brooks. 149 00:07:05,884 --> 00:07:07,510 I had to wear this dress this morning, sir. 150 00:07:07,636 --> 00:07:09,137 It was an emergency. 151 00:07:09,262 --> 00:07:12,265 You see, my wardrobe closet was locked and our 152 00:07:12,390 --> 00:07:15,268 cat Minerva accidentally swallowed the key. 153 00:07:15,393 --> 00:07:17,479 Well, you know Minerva, Mr. Conklin. 154 00:07:17,604 --> 00:07:19,356 Yes, indeed. 155 00:07:19,481 --> 00:07:20,857 What a puss. 156 00:07:22,984 --> 00:07:25,362 However, as you can see, I have withdrawn my 157 00:07:25,487 --> 00:07:28,281 collection box from its resting place in the hall. 158 00:07:28,406 --> 00:07:28,698 Oh, good. 159 00:07:28,823 --> 00:07:31,117 Then we can get right down to business, sir. 160 00:07:31,242 --> 00:07:34,579 I brought a list of some furniture you might like to buy with the money. 161 00:07:34,704 --> 00:07:40,210 First of all, I'd suggest a new desk, carved oak, very sturdy and impressive. 162 00:07:40,335 --> 00:07:42,879 Then some new filing cabinets, two or three 163 00:07:43,004 --> 00:07:45,924 chairs, and perhaps a comfortable leather couch. 164 00:07:46,049 --> 00:07:46,675 Oh, splendid. 165 00:07:46,800 --> 00:07:47,258 Splendid. 166 00:07:47,384 --> 00:07:50,637 Now, as I was about to say, when I arrived at school a half an hour 167 00:07:50,762 --> 00:07:54,766 ago, I promptly emptied the collection box and added all contributions. 168 00:07:54,891 --> 00:07:56,601 Oh, what was the total, sir? 169 00:07:56,726 --> 00:08:00,188 Forty cents. 170 00:08:00,313 --> 00:08:01,231 Forty cents? 171 00:08:01,356 --> 00:08:02,357 In cash. 172 00:08:03,483 --> 00:08:05,610 It is heartwarming indeed to learn of the 173 00:08:05,735 --> 00:08:08,113 esteem in which I am held by those around me. 174 00:08:08,238 --> 00:08:11,157 Miss Brooks, you are no doubt aware that the collection 175 00:08:11,282 --> 00:08:13,993 box for Jason Brill yielded three hundred dollars? 176 00:08:14,119 --> 00:08:15,036 Three hundred dollars, yes, sir. 177 00:08:15,161 --> 00:08:20,667 How do you account for the fact that I got 40 cents? 178 00:08:20,792 --> 00:08:23,628 Sheer personality. 179 00:08:23,753 --> 00:08:24,629 Oh, 40 cents! 180 00:08:24,754 --> 00:08:26,881 That is rather surprising, sir. 181 00:08:27,006 --> 00:08:28,633 Isn't it just? 182 00:08:28,758 --> 00:08:35,765 Particularly in view of the fact that I myself dropped in 50 cents. 183 00:08:37,392 --> 00:08:40,812 Not only did everyone fail to contribute, but 184 00:08:40,937 --> 00:08:44,441 some pencil-fingered wretch pilfered a dime. 185 00:08:44,566 --> 00:08:46,943 Oh, you'll get that back, sir. 186 00:08:47,068 --> 00:08:47,902 What's that? 187 00:08:48,027 --> 00:08:50,697 I mean, you'll get that back and more if you'll allow me to 188 00:08:50,822 --> 00:08:53,491 put the box out in the hall in a more prominent position. 189 00:08:53,616 --> 00:08:54,868 Well, you may do so if you wish. 190 00:08:54,993 --> 00:08:58,663 However, it's obvious to me that I can't count on any bonanzas. 191 00:08:58,788 --> 00:09:03,001 I'll have to think of some other way to get the last laugh on Jason Brill. 192 00:09:03,126 --> 00:09:04,669 Oh, you'd better run along now, Miss Brooks. 193 00:09:04,794 --> 00:09:05,378 Thank you, sir. 194 00:09:05,503 --> 00:09:08,381 And I hope you'll excuse my wearing this dress today. 195 00:09:08,506 --> 00:09:12,969 You didn't look like any fashion plate yesterday, either. 196 00:09:13,094 --> 00:09:16,598 As I recall, there was a button missing from your sleeve. 197 00:09:16,723 --> 00:09:18,933 Oh, that button was mislaid during my morning 198 00:09:19,058 --> 00:09:21,603 classes, sir, and I forgot to have it sewn back on. 199 00:09:21,728 --> 00:09:23,938 I was concentrating on your collection. 200 00:09:24,063 --> 00:09:26,816 Yes siree, Mr. Conklin, when it comes to any 201 00:09:26,941 --> 00:09:29,694 project of yours, I'm at your full support. 202 00:09:29,819 --> 00:09:33,281 Well, what a lovely speech. 203 00:09:33,406 --> 00:09:34,324 Thank you, sir. 204 00:09:34,449 --> 00:09:38,369 Before you go, you'd better open the collection box and check it, Miss Brooks. 205 00:09:38,495 --> 00:09:38,828 Check it? 206 00:09:38,953 --> 00:09:40,121 You mean look inside? 207 00:09:40,246 --> 00:09:41,289 Yes, sir. 208 00:09:42,791 --> 00:09:49,798 Thank you for my button. 209 00:09:51,090 --> 00:09:51,257 Good luck. 210 00:09:51,382 --> 00:09:52,592 Bye now. 211 00:09:52,717 --> 00:09:56,179 Harriet, your Uncle Charlie has just revealed to me, confidentially of course, 212 00:09:56,304 --> 00:09:59,724 the name of the hitherto unidentified donator to the cause of Jason Brill. 213 00:10:01,392 --> 00:10:02,477 Well, who is it, Daddy? 214 00:10:02,602 --> 00:10:04,813 It's a woman whose name I recognized at once. 215 00:10:04,938 --> 00:10:06,856 She's noted for her contributions to any 216 00:10:06,981 --> 00:10:09,192 cause which involves the welfare of children. 217 00:10:09,317 --> 00:10:11,861 None other than Mrs. Troy Graybar. 218 00:10:11,986 --> 00:10:13,947 Oh, I've heard of Mrs. Graybar. 219 00:10:14,072 --> 00:10:15,532 She has millions. 220 00:10:15,657 --> 00:10:18,993 At least, at least, she has instructed the welfare 221 00:10:19,118 --> 00:10:22,247 people to keep her posted on any worthy cause. 222 00:10:22,372 --> 00:10:26,000 Now, someone called her about the Clay High collection and succeeded 223 00:10:26,125 --> 00:10:30,171 in opening her heart and her checkbook to the tune of $300. 224 00:10:30,296 --> 00:10:33,299 Oh, golly, with that kind of money, Mr. Brill 225 00:10:33,424 --> 00:10:36,678 will be able to fix up his office like a palace. 226 00:10:36,803 --> 00:10:39,764 Now he'll really try to lord it over you, Daddy. 227 00:10:39,889 --> 00:10:41,057 That I know. 228 00:10:41,182 --> 00:10:47,021 I also know, thanks to dear old Charlie, Mrs. Graybar's telephone number. 229 00:10:47,146 --> 00:10:50,024 Her private phone number. 230 00:10:51,234 --> 00:10:52,777 You'd better run along, Harriet. 231 00:10:52,902 --> 00:10:54,028 I'm going to be very busy. 232 00:10:54,153 --> 00:10:59,617 All right, Daddy. 233 00:10:59,742 --> 00:11:00,451 Hello? 234 00:11:00,577 --> 00:11:01,786 Mrs. Graybar speaking. 235 00:11:01,911 --> 00:11:03,746 Who is this? 236 00:11:03,872 --> 00:11:05,999 Let us just say a friend. 237 00:11:06,124 --> 00:11:08,376 A friend of children everywhere. 238 00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:16,217 I, like yourself, am primarily interested in the welfare of our young. 239 00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:19,512 Oh, then you must be one of the welfare people. 240 00:11:19,637 --> 00:11:26,019 Well, I am vitally interested in the welfare of one Osgood Conklin. 241 00:11:26,144 --> 00:11:28,688 Osgood Conklin? 242 00:11:28,813 --> 00:11:29,939 Who is he? 243 00:11:33,276 --> 00:11:35,778 Who is Osgood Conklin? 244 00:11:35,904 --> 00:11:39,699 None other than the beloved principal of Madison High School. 245 00:11:39,824 --> 00:11:43,119 Although everybody worships the man, when they took up a collection to 246 00:11:43,244 --> 00:11:46,789 finance the renovating of his office, the total was woefully inadequate. 247 00:11:49,751 --> 00:11:50,043 Oh, what a shame. 248 00:11:50,168 --> 00:11:53,630 Yes, well, I don't like to play upon your tender sympathies, Mrs. Graybar, 249 00:11:53,755 --> 00:11:57,175 but if you could just see the students at Madison during lunch period. 250 00:11:58,801 --> 00:12:02,555 Fighting the pigeons for a crust of bread, and the flea-bitten 251 00:12:02,680 --> 00:12:05,808 teachers stalking the corridors like so many hobos. 252 00:12:11,272 --> 00:12:13,691 What an appalling state of affairs. 253 00:12:13,816 --> 00:12:18,571 You tell Mr. Conklin I'll be in his office at 3 o'clock this afternoon. 254 00:12:18,696 --> 00:12:21,783 Oh, you're an angel of mercy, dear lady. 255 00:12:21,908 --> 00:12:27,038 Oh, and tell him also that it is my wish to remain anonymous in this matter. 256 00:12:27,163 --> 00:12:30,416 If any of his teachers or students come into 257 00:12:30,541 --> 00:12:33,503 his office, I am to be plain Mrs. Smith. 258 00:12:33,628 --> 00:12:35,797 Mrs. Smith it shall be. 259 00:12:35,922 --> 00:12:37,298 That's fine. 260 00:12:37,423 --> 00:12:39,676 Thank you very much for calling. 261 00:12:39,801 --> 00:12:40,468 Goodbye. 262 00:12:40,593 --> 00:12:47,392 Thank you, Mrs. Graybar, for having a heart as big as all outdoors. 263 00:12:47,517 --> 00:12:53,982 I can hardly wait to get it indoors. 264 00:12:55,942 --> 00:12:57,318 You said for me, Mr. Conklin. 265 00:12:57,443 --> 00:12:58,945 Oh, yes, yes, Miss Brooks. 266 00:12:59,070 --> 00:13:01,197 I'm glad I caught you before you got off to the cafeteria. 267 00:13:01,322 --> 00:13:04,450 Oh, I'm having lunch in Mr. Boynton's lab today, Mr. Conklin. 268 00:13:04,575 --> 00:13:07,078 I wouldn't want to be seen in the cafeteria in this dress. 269 00:13:07,203 --> 00:13:09,205 What are you saying, Miss Brooks? 270 00:13:09,330 --> 00:13:12,709 That dress is positively stunning. 271 00:13:12,834 --> 00:13:15,753 So chic, so Parisienne. 272 00:13:15,878 --> 00:13:17,380 A French creation? 273 00:13:17,505 --> 00:13:21,634 Not unless it was created for the Eiffel Tower. 274 00:13:21,759 --> 00:13:23,261 Well, I think it's quite saucy. 275 00:13:23,386 --> 00:13:29,183 In fact, it's as casual as those charming oil-stained jeans Walter Denson wears. 276 00:13:29,308 --> 00:13:33,646 Or that lovely burlap smock Mr. Boynton affects in his lab. 277 00:13:33,771 --> 00:13:37,692 Oh, by the way, I want the three of you to stop by my office immediately after school. 278 00:13:37,817 --> 00:13:40,778 I want you to meet a friend of mine, a Mrs. Smith. 279 00:13:40,903 --> 00:13:42,196 Oh, yes, sir. 280 00:13:42,321 --> 00:13:44,365 Did you say Mrs. Smith, sir? 281 00:13:44,490 --> 00:13:46,492 We'll be looking forward to meeting her. 282 00:13:46,617 --> 00:13:48,036 Yes, well, it won't take much of your time. 283 00:13:48,161 --> 00:13:49,704 It will be a brief in-and-out affair. 284 00:13:49,829 --> 00:13:50,788 I understand. 285 00:13:50,913 --> 00:13:53,416 You merely want to put us on display, as it were. 286 00:13:53,541 --> 00:13:55,043 That's the idea. 287 00:13:55,168 --> 00:13:58,129 I want Mrs. Smith to see the splendid cross-section 288 00:13:58,254 --> 00:14:00,673 of teachers and students here at Madison. 289 00:14:00,798 --> 00:14:04,510 Oh, and Miss Brooks, don't look so morose in her presence. 290 00:14:04,635 --> 00:14:08,306 Smile as if you were fond of me. 291 00:14:09,724 --> 00:14:10,767 Yes, sir. 292 00:14:10,892 --> 00:14:14,812 Three o'clock, sir. 293 00:14:14,937 --> 00:14:16,773 See you later, fella. 294 00:14:16,898 --> 00:14:20,985 I wonder where Walter Denton is. 295 00:14:21,110 --> 00:14:23,404 I asked him to bring us some pie from the cafeteria. 296 00:14:23,529 --> 00:14:25,156 Oh, he'll be here in a minute. 297 00:14:25,281 --> 00:14:27,784 As manager of the drama class, Walter has to go over and see 298 00:14:27,909 --> 00:14:30,536 about the costumes they're going to wear in the play next week. 299 00:14:30,661 --> 00:14:31,954 Oh, I'd like to see that. 300 00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:36,375 Good, you'll find two tickets in your next sandwich. 301 00:14:36,501 --> 00:14:39,921 I told Walter about the ordeal we're in for this afternoon, when 302 00:14:40,046 --> 00:14:44,300 the charming Mrs. Kendall Smith comes over to inspect us hobos. 303 00:14:44,425 --> 00:14:47,595 You mean the woman Mrs. Davis met at the Conklins last night. 304 00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:48,596 What Walter had to say? 305 00:14:48,721 --> 00:14:50,223 Oh, he was livid. 306 00:14:50,348 --> 00:14:52,934 You could see the oil in his jeans coming to a boil. 307 00:14:53,059 --> 00:14:56,729 Well, come right in, Walter. 308 00:14:57,730 --> 00:15:00,066 Oh boy, what a job that was. 309 00:15:00,191 --> 00:15:03,236 Those costumes are spread out all over the auditorium basement. 310 00:15:03,361 --> 00:15:05,279 I didn't know those things were kept in the basement, Walter. 311 00:15:05,404 --> 00:15:06,697 Yeah, you ought to go down there sometime. 312 00:15:06,823 --> 00:15:09,867 It's a mecca of enchantment. 313 00:15:09,992 --> 00:15:11,327 What's enchanting about it? 314 00:15:11,452 --> 00:15:13,371 You meet a higher type of gopher down there. 315 00:15:13,496 --> 00:15:14,664 Yeah, pie, Miss Preston? 316 00:15:14,789 --> 00:15:15,873 Thank you, Walter. 317 00:15:15,998 --> 00:15:17,458 Didn't you get a piece for yourself? 318 00:15:17,583 --> 00:15:18,501 No, thanks. 319 00:15:18,626 --> 00:15:21,963 I had a couple of slabs in the cafeteria. 320 00:15:22,088 --> 00:15:25,299 I got an extra fork, though. 321 00:15:26,467 --> 00:15:29,137 I lose my appetite every time I think of us being examined 322 00:15:29,262 --> 00:15:31,597 like guinea pigs for that old shrew this afternoon. 323 00:15:31,722 --> 00:15:33,307 Well, there's not much we can do about it. 324 00:15:33,432 --> 00:15:35,268 Sort of a command performance, isn't it? 325 00:15:35,393 --> 00:15:39,021 That's what it is, all right, a command performance. 326 00:15:39,147 --> 00:15:40,648 Wait a minute. 327 00:15:40,773 --> 00:15:43,985 Walter, are those costumes all ready to be worn? 328 00:15:44,110 --> 00:15:44,527 Sure. 329 00:15:44,652 --> 00:15:46,320 They're cleaned and pressed and everything. 330 00:15:46,445 --> 00:15:50,533 Then why should we allow Mrs. Smith to gloat over us dressed the way we are? 331 00:15:50,658 --> 00:15:52,076 What are you driving at, Miss Brooks? 332 00:15:52,201 --> 00:15:56,038 Why don't we borrow a few of those costumes and really put on the dogs? 333 00:15:56,164 --> 00:15:58,124 How would Mr. Conklin feel about that? 334 00:15:58,249 --> 00:16:01,460 Well, from what Mrs. Davis said at the Conklin bridge party last 335 00:16:01,586 --> 00:16:04,672 night, Mrs. Smith needled him unmercifully about our clothes. 336 00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:07,925 I imagine he'd be very grateful to us for improving our appearance. 337 00:16:08,050 --> 00:16:12,138 Yeah, hey, that'd get us in real solid with him. 338 00:16:12,263 --> 00:16:13,556 I'm all for it, Miss Brooks. 339 00:16:13,681 --> 00:16:16,976 So am I. Anything to get the last laugh on Mrs. Smith. 340 00:16:17,101 --> 00:16:20,813 Miss Brooks, I could kiss you for thinking of this. 341 00:16:20,938 --> 00:16:27,945 You could kiss me even if I didn't think of it. 342 00:16:39,415 --> 00:16:46,422 ♪ 343 00:17:09,987 --> 00:17:16,994 Come in, no matter what finance company you're from. 344 00:17:24,669 --> 00:17:27,296 I'm Mrs. Graybar. 345 00:17:27,421 --> 00:17:31,008 I... Oh, and you, poor soul, must be Mr. Compton. 346 00:17:31,133 --> 00:17:31,592 The same. 347 00:17:31,717 --> 00:17:34,637 The welfare people informed me of your visit. 348 00:17:34,762 --> 00:17:36,472 You shouldn't have come. 349 00:17:36,597 --> 00:17:38,224 I'll get along. 350 00:17:38,349 --> 00:17:39,350 Somehow. 351 00:17:41,018 --> 00:17:43,854 You're very, very brave, Mr. Conklin. 352 00:17:43,980 --> 00:17:46,899 But of course, you can't think only of yourself. 353 00:17:47,024 --> 00:17:50,319 Children and young people are so very impressionable. 354 00:17:50,444 --> 00:17:55,157 And when they see their principal's office, a man whom they should respect. 355 00:17:55,283 --> 00:17:59,412 Oh, a man's self-respect is important too, dear lady. 356 00:17:59,537 --> 00:18:02,832 If you're thinking of making out any checks, please bear in 357 00:18:02,957 --> 00:18:06,544 mind that I have never been one to stoop to accepting handouts. 358 00:18:08,671 --> 00:18:10,381 I may be poor. 359 00:18:10,506 --> 00:18:12,758 But I have my pride. 360 00:18:17,013 --> 00:18:20,391 The very name Conklin is synonymous with pride. 361 00:18:20,516 --> 00:18:24,770 Conklin, C-O-N-K-L-I-N. 362 00:18:24,895 --> 00:18:27,898 Believe me, Mrs. Graybar... Oh, please, please, please. 363 00:18:28,024 --> 00:18:29,984 Do call me Mrs. Smith. 364 00:18:30,109 --> 00:18:31,319 Someone may overhear. 365 00:18:31,444 --> 00:18:35,114 Oh, by the way, tell me this. 366 00:18:35,239 --> 00:18:37,742 What about your teachers and your students? 367 00:18:37,867 --> 00:18:40,828 Is it true that they too are in dire straits? 368 00:18:40,953 --> 00:18:42,913 You'll soon see for yourself. 369 00:18:43,039 --> 00:18:47,543 I'm expecting two average teachers and an average student to drop in. 370 00:18:47,668 --> 00:18:50,713 Miss Brooks, Mr. Boynton, and Walter Denton. 371 00:18:50,838 --> 00:18:54,675 My heart bleeds for the poor devils. 372 00:18:54,800 --> 00:18:58,262 But their classrooms are neat. 373 00:19:00,723 --> 00:19:05,311 Such courage deserves a helping hand. 374 00:19:05,436 --> 00:19:06,354 Oh, I'm sorry. 375 00:19:06,479 --> 00:19:09,106 Quite dusty in here. 376 00:19:09,231 --> 00:19:10,691 May I have some water? 377 00:19:10,816 --> 00:19:12,568 Well, of course, of course. 378 00:19:12,693 --> 00:19:16,364 I keep a canteen in my inner office. 379 00:19:16,489 --> 00:19:18,949 Excuse me, Mrs. Smith. 380 00:19:19,075 --> 00:19:22,703 Go right ahead with your doodling. 381 00:19:22,828 --> 00:19:28,125 I'll just take a minute. 382 00:19:28,250 --> 00:19:31,629 It's me, Miss Conklin, Miss Brooks. 383 00:19:31,754 --> 00:19:34,006 Um, Mr. Conklin? 384 00:19:34,131 --> 00:19:35,591 Uh, come in. 385 00:19:46,727 --> 00:19:51,982 Hello, darling. 386 00:19:52,108 --> 00:19:53,484 Who are you? 387 00:19:53,609 --> 00:19:56,862 I... I am Mrs. Smith. 388 00:19:56,987 --> 00:19:58,239 Tom Smith, I'm Brooks. 389 00:19:58,364 --> 00:20:00,199 Where's Conklin? 390 00:20:02,451 --> 00:20:06,330 If you mean Mr. Conklin, he's in the inner office getting some water. 391 00:20:06,455 --> 00:20:06,997 Water? 392 00:20:07,123 --> 00:20:08,499 What's that? 393 00:20:11,377 --> 00:20:14,630 Well, I see he's stripped the decks for action. 394 00:20:14,755 --> 00:20:15,798 Action? 395 00:20:15,923 --> 00:20:17,591 Probably going to throw another party, you know. 396 00:20:17,716 --> 00:20:19,927 Party? 397 00:20:20,052 --> 00:20:25,599 Oh, my dear, this school is the country club of all time. 398 00:20:25,724 --> 00:20:27,810 You ought to drop in some lunch period. 399 00:20:27,935 --> 00:20:31,355 Gad, the joint really jumped. 400 00:20:31,480 --> 00:20:34,191 Hors d'oeuvres, cocktails. 401 00:20:34,316 --> 00:20:35,985 Cocktails? 402 00:20:36,110 --> 00:20:36,569 Um... 403 00:20:36,694 --> 00:20:38,863 Tell me more, Miss Brooks. 404 00:20:38,988 --> 00:20:43,075 Well, of course, the card games are just fabulous. 405 00:20:43,200 --> 00:20:44,827 Conklin always wins, you know. 406 00:20:44,952 --> 00:20:50,416 There must be something to the saying, money goes to money. 407 00:20:50,541 --> 00:20:53,294 Not this time, it doesn't. 408 00:20:53,419 --> 00:20:56,338 Mr. Conklin, Miss Brooks is waiting. 409 00:20:56,464 --> 00:21:00,259 Miss Brooks, oh, fine, fine, fine. 410 00:21:00,384 --> 00:21:01,927 Hello, Miss Brooks. 411 00:21:02,052 --> 00:21:03,929 So happy you dropped by. 412 00:21:04,054 --> 00:21:11,061 I wanted Mrs. Smith to see what I consider a cross-section of this house. 413 00:21:13,272 --> 00:21:13,397 Miss Brooks! 414 00:21:13,522 --> 00:21:13,647 Here. 415 00:21:13,772 --> 00:21:17,109 So this is what you'll consider a cross-section of your faculty? 416 00:21:17,234 --> 00:21:21,030 Believe me, Mrs. Smith, I don't understand this, but I'll get to the bottom of it. 417 00:21:21,155 --> 00:21:22,239 Who is it? 418 00:21:22,364 --> 00:21:22,948 Mr. Bison. 419 00:21:23,073 --> 00:21:23,532 Oh. 420 00:21:23,657 --> 00:21:27,620 Now you will see a teacher who's really representative of our faculty. 421 00:21:27,745 --> 00:21:29,747 Come in, Boynton. 422 00:21:29,872 --> 00:21:36,837 Miss, I'd like to present Philip Boynton, the Sir Walter Raleigh of our faculty. 423 00:21:42,301 --> 00:21:43,010 Honored. 424 00:21:43,135 --> 00:21:46,305 Yes! 425 00:21:46,430 --> 00:21:48,807 A puzzle, Sir Walter. 426 00:21:52,353 --> 00:21:59,360 Oh, stop it! 427 00:22:00,986 --> 00:22:03,781 Really, Mrs... Will you stop it? 428 00:22:03,906 --> 00:22:10,913 Believe me, madam, nothing like this has ever happened here before. 429 00:22:12,164 --> 00:22:19,505 Well... Can the hounds come through here? 430 00:22:19,630 --> 00:22:23,926 Oh, no! 431 00:22:24,051 --> 00:22:27,680 Mrs. Smith, I'd like to present an average student. 432 00:22:27,805 --> 00:22:30,683 A charmed, I'm sure. 433 00:22:30,808 --> 00:22:30,891 Oh, yikes! 434 00:22:31,016 --> 00:22:36,480 Don't fret, Headmaster, sir. 435 00:22:36,605 --> 00:22:42,361 I'll have the brush of that candy box hanging in your trophy room by dawn. 436 00:22:42,486 --> 00:22:45,698 If you don't, Master Denton, we'll have you hanging there. 437 00:22:45,823 --> 00:22:46,740 Eh, Miss Brooks? 438 00:22:46,865 --> 00:22:50,411 Good show, Philip. 439 00:22:52,621 --> 00:22:56,667 Never in all my life have I seen such a vulgar display! 440 00:22:56,792 --> 00:23:01,046 Why, the person that phoned me from the welfare board must be a raving lunatic! 441 00:23:01,171 --> 00:23:04,300 Why, I'm as sane as anyone! 442 00:23:04,425 --> 00:23:07,595 That is, this has all been a ghastly mistake, Mrs. Graybar! 443 00:23:07,720 --> 00:23:08,429 Mrs. Graybar! 444 00:23:08,554 --> 00:23:10,180 Mrs. Graybar! 445 00:23:10,306 --> 00:23:16,478 I came here with every intention of enriching you and your institution. 446 00:23:16,604 --> 00:23:20,983 But from now on, I shall use all my power to impoverish you. 447 00:23:21,108 --> 00:23:26,238 Our youth must no longer be exposed to such, such decadence. 448 00:23:26,363 --> 00:23:26,905 But Madam! 449 00:23:27,031 --> 00:23:34,038 Good day, sir. 450 00:23:36,707 --> 00:23:39,126 Explanation, anyone? 451 00:23:39,251 --> 00:23:40,502 I'd love an explanation. 452 00:23:40,628 --> 00:23:43,714 Why did Mrs. Graybar call herself Mrs. Smith? 453 00:23:43,839 --> 00:23:45,841 Because she doesn't like publicity. 454 00:23:45,966 --> 00:23:50,346 When she makes a... I'M THE ONE WHO WANTS AN EXPLANATION, MR. CONKLIN! 455 00:23:50,471 --> 00:23:51,930 What have you got to say for yourself? 456 00:23:52,056 --> 00:23:53,557 Just one thing, Mr. Conklin. 457 00:23:53,682 --> 00:23:54,350 What's that? 458 00:23:54,475 --> 00:23:55,225 Tally-ho! 459 00:23:55,351 --> 00:23:58,854 Yikes and away! 460 00:23:58,979 --> 00:24:01,899 Of course, it may take some time. 461 00:24:02,024 --> 00:24:04,360 I'm sure it will. 462 00:24:04,485 --> 00:24:07,363 On the other hand, my little vignette is quite brief. 463 00:24:07,488 --> 00:24:10,783 Mrs. Graybar happens to be the philanthropist who 464 00:24:10,908 --> 00:24:14,119 only yesterday turned over $300 to Jason Brill. 465 00:24:14,244 --> 00:24:18,874 I heard about that on the radio... Oh, quiet! 466 00:24:18,999 --> 00:24:22,294 Hoping to receive a similar gratuity, I formulated a clever plan to 467 00:24:22,419 --> 00:24:26,006 enlist her sympathy, even going so far as to lacerate my window shade. 468 00:24:28,884 --> 00:24:30,928 Hey, boy, what a swell scheme! 469 00:24:31,053 --> 00:24:35,140 It's our principle to think of the clever... Oh, shut up! 470 00:24:35,265 --> 00:24:35,891 Mr. Conklin? 471 00:24:36,016 --> 00:24:36,767 Well, Miss Brooks? 472 00:24:36,892 --> 00:24:41,271 When Mrs. Graybar said she was going to impoverish you, it was no idle threat. 473 00:24:41,397 --> 00:24:42,189 What do you mean? 474 00:24:42,314 --> 00:24:43,565 I couldn't stop her, sir. 475 00:24:43,691 --> 00:24:50,698 She just took the 40 cents out of your collection box. 476 00:24:52,282 --> 00:24:59,289 ♪ 476 00:25:00,305 --> 00:26:00,736 Do you want subtitles for any video? -=[ ai.OpenSubtitles.com ]=-