"Our Miss Brooks" The Little Visitor

1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Do you want subtitles for any video? -=[ ai.OpenSubtitles.com ]=- 2 00:00:13,430 --> 00:00:20,395 Conklin going to have a baby. 3 00:00:22,564 --> 00:00:24,358 Martha Conklin. 4 00:00:24,483 --> 00:00:26,360 Mrs. Osgood Conklin. 5 00:00:26,485 --> 00:00:28,195 That's them. 6 00:00:28,320 --> 00:00:30,489 After all these years. 7 00:00:30,614 --> 00:00:33,325 Why, their daughter Harriet is in her teens. 8 00:00:33,450 --> 00:00:38,622 Maybe they were waiting to see how she turned out. 9 00:00:38,747 --> 00:00:42,084 Connie, are you absolutely sure about this? 10 00:00:42,209 --> 00:00:43,585 Well, not absolutely. 11 00:00:43,710 --> 00:00:46,588 Mr. Conklin hasn't read the word of it at school, but 12 00:00:46,713 --> 00:00:49,466 the circumstantial evidence seems pretty reliable. 13 00:00:49,591 --> 00:00:51,009 Circumstantial evidence? 14 00:00:51,134 --> 00:00:54,346 Yes, first place, nobody's seen Mrs. Conklin in months. 15 00:00:54,471 --> 00:00:57,724 And then yesterday, when I called the house for Mr. Conklin, and I 16 00:00:57,849 --> 00:01:01,395 spoke to Mrs. Conklin, I asked where she'd been keeping herself lately. 17 00:01:01,520 --> 00:01:02,604 What'd she say? 18 00:01:02,729 --> 00:01:05,065 She said she'd been doing an awful lot of knitting. 19 00:01:05,190 --> 00:01:07,317 Oh, that doesn't prove a thing. 20 00:01:07,442 --> 00:01:10,028 I do a lot of knitting and nobody says that I'm good at it. 21 00:01:10,153 --> 00:01:13,949 Oh, that's different. 22 00:01:14,074 --> 00:01:16,785 But before she hung up, she did admit that they 23 00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:19,746 were expecting, quote, a little visitor, unquote. 24 00:01:19,871 --> 00:01:22,624 That does sound like a baby's on the way. 25 00:01:22,749 --> 00:01:25,127 Oh, I'd give anything to see Osgood 26 00:01:25,252 --> 00:01:28,380 Conklin's face when he sees the little thing. 27 00:01:28,505 --> 00:01:35,512 I'd give anything to see the little thing's face when it sees Osgood Conklin's face. 28 00:01:36,555 --> 00:01:39,725 I wonder if I ought to call Martha and wish her good luck. 29 00:01:39,850 --> 00:01:41,226 Oh, don't do that, Mrs. Davis. 30 00:01:41,351 --> 00:01:44,771 Wait until either she or Mr. Conklin mention it to us. 31 00:01:44,896 --> 00:01:48,692 But in the meantime, we could be thinking about a present, I guess. 32 00:01:48,817 --> 00:01:51,737 What would be appropriate and not too expensive? 33 00:01:51,862 --> 00:01:53,905 Now, let's see. 34 00:01:54,031 --> 00:01:56,450 A new baby should have a rattle. 35 00:01:56,575 --> 00:01:58,201 Oh, not if it's properly lubricated. 36 00:01:58,327 --> 00:02:02,289 Oh, that kind. 37 00:02:02,414 --> 00:02:05,334 Well, that would be nice, but how about something more useful? 38 00:02:05,459 --> 00:02:08,253 Oh, there's Walter Denton. 39 00:02:08,378 --> 00:02:09,254 Come in. 40 00:02:09,379 --> 00:02:12,632 Well, I'd better go out to the kitchen and make some more toast. 41 00:02:12,758 --> 00:02:14,384 Walter may want a bite. 42 00:02:14,509 --> 00:02:18,096 That's the understatement of the year. 43 00:02:18,221 --> 00:02:19,014 Hiya, Miss Brooks. 44 00:02:19,139 --> 00:02:20,349 Oh, good morning, Walter. 45 00:02:20,474 --> 00:02:22,934 Sit down, Mrs. Davis is fixing some toes. 46 00:02:23,060 --> 00:02:24,061 Oh, thanks. 47 00:02:24,186 --> 00:02:26,396 But I haven't much appetite today. 48 00:02:26,521 --> 00:02:29,191 Something's been eating me all morning long. 49 00:02:29,316 --> 00:02:31,943 Well, that's a switch. 50 00:02:32,069 --> 00:02:32,986 What's wrong? 51 00:02:33,111 --> 00:02:36,281 Well, it's the way Harriet Conklin's been acting all week. 52 00:02:36,406 --> 00:02:38,200 There's something funny going on. 53 00:02:38,325 --> 00:02:39,534 Something funny? 54 00:02:39,659 --> 00:02:41,203 Yeah, every time I ask her for a date, she 55 00:02:41,328 --> 00:02:43,038 says she has to stay home and help her mother. 56 00:02:43,163 --> 00:02:46,750 That sounds like a pretty lame excuse to me. 57 00:02:46,875 --> 00:02:49,169 Miss Brooks, do you think there might be someone else? 58 00:02:49,294 --> 00:02:50,670 Any day now. 59 00:02:52,964 --> 00:02:55,133 I mean, why should there be someone else, Walter? 60 00:02:55,258 --> 00:02:57,719 Harriet still seems very fond of you. 61 00:02:57,844 --> 00:02:58,595 Well, I don't know. 62 00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:01,306 There's something very mysterious going on at their place. 63 00:03:01,431 --> 00:03:04,601 The last few times I was over there, I didn't see Harriet's mother at all. 64 00:03:04,726 --> 00:03:07,312 And I miss her, Miss Brooks. 65 00:03:07,437 --> 00:03:08,939 Well, maybe she was busy. 66 00:03:09,064 --> 00:03:11,525 Well, she was never too busy to see me before. 67 00:03:11,650 --> 00:03:15,320 Gosh, for months now we've observed a sort of a ritual at the Conklins. 68 00:03:15,445 --> 00:03:17,322 It got to be a regular routine. 69 00:03:17,447 --> 00:03:20,700 I'd strum my ukulele on their porch until 11 o'clock. 70 00:03:20,826 --> 00:03:24,704 And then when Harriet went up to bed, I'd stay outside and serenade her. 71 00:03:24,830 --> 00:03:31,962 Then promptly at 11.15, Mr. Conklin had come out and throw me down the porch steps. 72 00:03:32,087 --> 00:03:37,092 And then Mrs. Conklin had come out and bring me my hat and a bandage. 73 00:03:37,217 --> 00:03:39,594 Oh, she was like a mother to me. 74 00:03:39,719 --> 00:03:41,930 Well, she's the type for it. 75 00:03:42,055 --> 00:03:43,515 We'd better hurry to school, Walter. 76 00:03:43,640 --> 00:03:47,269 I've got to stop in Mr. Conklin's office before my first class. 77 00:03:47,394 --> 00:03:50,272 And after I've had a little talk with him, I might be 78 00:03:50,397 --> 00:03:53,442 able to throw some light on Harriet's recent behavior. 79 00:03:53,567 --> 00:03:54,985 Well, I sure hope so. 80 00:03:55,110 --> 00:03:56,862 This thing's just ruining me. 81 00:03:56,987 --> 00:03:58,822 I can't even work up an appetite anymore. 82 00:03:58,947 --> 00:04:00,323 I know. 83 00:04:00,449 --> 00:04:07,247 So slip the jelly jar in your pocket and let's go. 84 00:04:09,166 --> 00:04:12,294 What I can't understand, Harriet, is why your 85 00:04:12,419 --> 00:04:16,173 mother waited so long to surprise me with this news. 86 00:04:24,973 --> 00:04:27,225 Well, I guess she didn't know just how you'd take it, Daddy. 87 00:04:27,350 --> 00:04:29,478 She knew perfectly well how I'd take it. 88 00:04:29,603 --> 00:04:32,898 How would any normal man react to the information that his 89 00:04:33,023 --> 00:04:36,568 sister-in-law expected him to house and feed her pet monkey? 90 00:04:38,195 --> 00:04:43,658 But it's only for a week, Daddy, while Aunt Elsie's away on her vacation. 91 00:04:43,783 --> 00:04:46,203 You know how crazy she is about skiing. 92 00:04:46,328 --> 00:04:49,539 I don't like a guest who swings from the chandelier. 93 00:04:49,664 --> 00:04:52,792 I don't like the arbitrary manner in which this matter was handled. 94 00:04:52,918 --> 00:04:55,545 For weeks now, your mother has been knitting tiny 95 00:04:55,670 --> 00:04:58,632 garments which I thought were for some needy children. 96 00:04:58,757 --> 00:05:02,385 But Daddy... I wouldn't even have known about that confounded monkey yet if I hadn't picked up 97 00:05:02,511 --> 00:05:06,348 one of the little garments last night and asked what the hole in the seat of the pants was for. 98 00:05:09,643 --> 00:05:16,024 Well, baby comes from a very warm climate and mother doesn't want him to catch cold. 99 00:05:16,149 --> 00:05:17,567 Baby? 100 00:05:17,692 --> 00:05:19,903 Oh, that's what Aunt Elsie calls him. 101 00:05:20,028 --> 00:05:22,697 Oh, I'm sure you'll grow very fond of him, Daddy. 102 00:05:22,822 --> 00:05:24,324 He's a ring-tailed monkey. 103 00:05:24,449 --> 00:05:27,577 I don't care what his persuasion is. 104 00:05:27,702 --> 00:05:30,038 I know them already. 105 00:05:30,163 --> 00:05:31,831 Now, have you tidied up the office? 106 00:05:31,957 --> 00:05:34,251 Mr. Stone is coming over sometime after lunch. 107 00:05:34,376 --> 00:05:36,503 Yes, it's all spic and span, Daddy. 108 00:05:36,628 --> 00:05:39,381 As head of the Board of Education, Mr. Stone can appoint 109 00:05:39,506 --> 00:05:42,217 you to that new post of district supervisor, can't he? 110 00:05:42,342 --> 00:05:44,719 That is what he is coming over to discuss. 111 00:05:44,844 --> 00:05:47,430 Now, please go inside and straighten out the files. 112 00:05:47,556 --> 00:05:49,015 All right, Daddy. 113 00:05:49,140 --> 00:05:51,226 Oh, before I go, would you do me a favor? 114 00:05:51,351 --> 00:05:54,854 This seems to be quite a vogue for it these days. 115 00:05:54,980 --> 00:05:55,897 What is it? 116 00:05:56,022 --> 00:05:59,526 Well, Jenny McPherson's mother said that she might leave Jenny's baby sister, 117 00:05:59,651 --> 00:06:03,697 Patsy, in our home economics class while she goes shopping this morning. 118 00:06:03,822 --> 00:06:04,447 Why? 119 00:06:04,573 --> 00:06:07,659 Well, that way, Miss Miller can give us some practical instructions 120 00:06:07,784 --> 00:06:10,870 in the care, feeding, and dressing of a real eight-month-old baby. 121 00:06:10,996 --> 00:06:14,040 But if Mrs. McPherson calls your office and says she's not 122 00:06:14,165 --> 00:06:17,377 going to bring the baby, would you please come down to class? 123 00:06:17,502 --> 00:06:22,215 Do you think I'd be an appropriate substitute? 124 00:06:22,340 --> 00:06:23,174 Now get going. 125 00:06:23,300 --> 00:06:25,677 Yes, ma'am. 126 00:06:27,846 --> 00:06:29,848 Congratulations are in order. 127 00:06:29,973 --> 00:06:30,890 Congratulations? 128 00:06:31,016 --> 00:06:31,474 Yes. 129 00:06:31,600 --> 00:06:33,727 You're expecting a visitor, aren't you? 130 00:06:33,852 --> 00:06:36,271 Yes, but he may not be here for hours yet. 131 00:06:36,396 --> 00:06:38,523 Now, if there's nothing else that you want to talk to me 132 00:06:38,648 --> 00:06:41,067 about... Oh, I can understand your being on edge, Mr. Conklin. 133 00:06:41,192 --> 00:06:44,237 But tell me, how is Mrs. Conklin taking it? 134 00:06:44,362 --> 00:06:45,447 Mrs. Conklin? 135 00:06:45,572 --> 00:06:47,991 What has she got to do with my visitor? 136 00:06:48,116 --> 00:06:48,783 Your visitor? 137 00:06:48,908 --> 00:06:50,118 Oh, yes, yes. 138 00:06:50,243 --> 00:06:54,080 And as far as congratulations go, I wish you wouldn't put the whammy on me. 139 00:06:54,205 --> 00:06:57,792 It may not even go through. 140 00:06:57,917 --> 00:07:00,253 Oh, Mr. Conklin, you're in a bad way. 141 00:07:00,378 --> 00:07:03,548 I better have a little talk with you. 142 00:07:03,673 --> 00:07:08,887 Now, everything's going to be just fine, and you'll be as proud as you can be. 143 00:07:09,012 --> 00:07:10,472 Well, I suppose you're right. 144 00:07:10,597 --> 00:07:15,185 Still, I haven't any definite news yet, and I won't have until Mr. Stone gets here. 145 00:07:15,310 --> 00:07:16,686 Mr. Stone? 146 00:07:16,811 --> 00:07:17,812 Oh, no, sir. 147 00:07:17,937 --> 00:07:21,691 I was referring to the little visitor you're expecting at home. 148 00:07:21,816 --> 00:07:22,901 Oh, him. 149 00:07:23,026 --> 00:07:24,736 I wouldn't be too sure, sir. 150 00:07:24,861 --> 00:07:26,571 It might be a her. 151 00:07:26,696 --> 00:07:30,450 Him or her, it all adds up to the same thing. 152 00:07:30,575 --> 00:07:34,871 I must say you're taking this very calmly, Mr. Councilor. 153 00:07:34,996 --> 00:07:35,914 What else can I do? 154 00:07:36,039 --> 00:07:39,459 It's too late to send it back. 155 00:07:42,712 --> 00:07:45,382 I just don't understand your attitude, sir. 156 00:07:45,507 --> 00:07:47,717 Why, I should think you'd be thrilled at the idea. 157 00:07:47,842 --> 00:07:48,927 Thrilled? 158 00:07:49,052 --> 00:07:50,011 Certainly. 159 00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:56,851 He's liable to look just like you, you know. 160 00:07:56,976 --> 00:08:00,939 Miss Brooks, if this is your idea of a joke... A joke? 161 00:08:01,064 --> 00:08:01,815 Why should it be? 162 00:08:01,940 --> 00:08:04,109 I know Mrs. Conklin would want it that way. 163 00:08:04,234 --> 00:08:07,153 Tell me, just what is the date of arrival? 164 00:08:07,278 --> 00:08:09,406 Oh, almost any time now. 165 00:08:09,531 --> 00:08:12,033 Oh, then Mrs. Conklin is home waiting. 166 00:08:12,158 --> 00:08:18,498 If I know Mrs. Conklin, she won't even be around when he gets here. 167 00:08:18,623 --> 00:08:22,419 Mr. Tomlin, are you sure you're as calm as you appear to be on the surface? 168 00:08:22,544 --> 00:08:24,212 Of course I'm calm. 169 00:08:24,337 --> 00:08:26,923 Now, I would appreciate it if you'd clear out and 170 00:08:27,048 --> 00:08:29,926 let me get my chores done before Mr. Stone gets here. 171 00:08:30,051 --> 00:08:31,052 Oh, yes, of course, sir. 172 00:08:31,177 --> 00:08:34,514 But if I can be of any help to you, you will let me know, won't you? 173 00:08:34,639 --> 00:08:37,350 For instance, during my first free period this 174 00:08:37,475 --> 00:08:40,687 morning, I could run out and get you some nice cigars. 175 00:08:40,812 --> 00:08:41,396 No, thank you. 176 00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:43,523 I've given up smoking for a while. 177 00:08:43,648 --> 00:08:46,234 However, there is something you could pick up for me. 178 00:08:46,359 --> 00:08:47,110 What's that? 179 00:08:47,235 --> 00:08:48,737 A bunch of bananas. 180 00:08:48,862 --> 00:08:55,827 The little brute will love the... Yes, sir. 181 00:08:57,162 --> 00:08:58,163 Bananas. 182 00:08:59,497 --> 00:09:00,957 Mr. Conklin? 183 00:09:01,082 --> 00:09:02,625 Yes? 184 00:09:02,751 --> 00:09:06,129 If I don't get back right away, don't worry about me. 185 00:09:06,254 --> 00:09:13,261 I'll be looking in the yellow pages for a cheap psychiatrist. 186 00:09:21,978 --> 00:09:28,985 Oh, there's the ideal gift. 187 00:09:30,904 --> 00:09:32,697 A baby bassinet. 188 00:09:32,822 --> 00:09:33,907 You think he'd like that? 189 00:09:34,032 --> 00:09:35,074 Oh, he'd love it. 190 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:37,827 And if we both chip in, it should be fairly reasonable. 191 00:09:37,952 --> 00:09:38,745 Oh, good. 192 00:09:38,870 --> 00:09:40,789 How much cash have you got, Miss Brooks? 193 00:09:40,914 --> 00:09:42,081 How much have you got? 194 00:09:42,207 --> 00:09:43,124 How much is the bassinet? 195 00:09:43,249 --> 00:09:45,418 $14.50. 196 00:09:45,543 --> 00:09:47,295 I've got $7.25. 197 00:09:47,420 --> 00:09:50,131 Oh, fine. 198 00:09:50,256 --> 00:09:51,591 How much have we got all together? 199 00:09:51,716 --> 00:09:54,010 Eight and a quarter. 200 00:09:55,386 --> 00:09:58,097 But you have a charge account here, don't you, Mr. Boynton? 201 00:09:58,223 --> 00:10:00,183 So do you, don't you, Miss Brooks? 202 00:10:00,308 --> 00:10:02,310 Maybe we could find something for eight and a quarter. 203 00:10:02,435 --> 00:10:06,731 Well, I temporarily suspended my account here, Mr. Boynton. 204 00:10:06,856 --> 00:10:10,318 You see, Sherry's and I had a little difficulty over some bills they sent me. 205 00:10:10,443 --> 00:10:11,069 Difficulty? 206 00:10:11,194 --> 00:10:14,072 They wanted me to pay them. 207 00:10:14,197 --> 00:10:18,076 But if we put it on your account, I could pay you each month a little bit, okay? 208 00:10:18,201 --> 00:10:20,286 Why, of course it's okay, Miss Brooks. 209 00:10:20,411 --> 00:10:21,412 How much a month? 210 00:10:21,538 --> 00:10:24,541 Well, we'll let your lawyer settle that. 211 00:10:24,666 --> 00:10:28,127 Why don't you ask that salesman if we can get immediate delivery on this? 212 00:10:28,253 --> 00:10:28,962 Me? 213 00:10:29,087 --> 00:10:30,255 Oh, but I'd be embarrassed. 214 00:10:30,380 --> 00:10:31,923 I never bought anything like this. 215 00:10:32,048 --> 00:10:34,425 This is as good a time as any to start. 216 00:10:34,551 --> 00:10:36,803 You know what happens to me when I get embarrassed. 217 00:10:36,928 --> 00:10:38,638 It's just like when I have to tell a fib. 218 00:10:38,763 --> 00:10:39,389 I hiccup. 219 00:10:39,514 --> 00:10:40,682 It's psychosomatic. 220 00:10:40,807 --> 00:10:42,684 Well, you'd better get over that. 221 00:10:42,809 --> 00:10:43,852 Salesman? 222 00:10:43,977 --> 00:10:45,812 Oh, yes, ma'am? 223 00:10:45,937 --> 00:10:48,773 Mr. Boynton here wants to ask you a question. 224 00:10:48,898 --> 00:10:50,900 Well, I... 225 00:10:51,025 --> 00:10:53,528 Could we get immediate delivery on this bathinette? 226 00:10:53,653 --> 00:10:55,822 See, you didn't even hiccup. 227 00:10:55,947 --> 00:10:58,283 Why yes, I think we can give you immediate delivery. 228 00:10:58,408 --> 00:11:02,287 Is it for your own baby, sir? 229 00:11:02,412 --> 00:11:04,455 Just charge it to Mr. Philip Boynton. 230 00:11:04,581 --> 00:11:05,290 All righty. 231 00:11:05,415 --> 00:11:08,668 Now let me see, that's $14.50. 232 00:11:08,793 --> 00:11:09,544 Complete. 233 00:11:09,669 --> 00:11:12,714 Well, plus tax, that will be $14.91. 234 00:11:12,839 --> 00:11:16,384 I'll just make a note of that if you don't mind. 235 00:11:16,509 --> 00:11:18,469 All right, and I'll check on the gift wrapping. 236 00:11:18,595 --> 00:11:19,888 I'll be back in just a second. 237 00:11:20,013 --> 00:11:23,141 Let's see, $14.91. 238 00:11:23,266 --> 00:11:28,688 Uh, that's exactly $7.45 apiece, Miss Brooks, with one cent left over. 239 00:11:28,813 --> 00:11:31,065 I know you're going to insist on paying that extra cent, 240 00:11:31,190 --> 00:11:33,776 Mr. Boynton, and I'm not going to let you be gallant this time. 241 00:11:33,902 --> 00:11:38,072 There's only one fair way to settle this, and I'm not going to let you protest. 242 00:11:38,197 --> 00:11:44,746 We'll flip a coin to see who pays the extra penny, and that would... Pen. 243 00:11:44,871 --> 00:11:47,415 As district supervisor will be done in conjunction 244 00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:50,043 with your present duties as principal of Madison. 245 00:11:50,168 --> 00:11:52,462 It entails considerable effort. 246 00:11:52,587 --> 00:11:53,963 I know that, Mr. Stone. 247 00:11:54,088 --> 00:11:59,010 Yes, it means, oh, quite a bit of night work, several weekends away from home. 248 00:11:59,135 --> 00:12:01,679 You won't get to see much of your wife, I'm afraid. 249 00:12:01,804 --> 00:12:04,891 At a time like this, who thinks of compensation? 250 00:12:05,016 --> 00:12:07,310 A drawback. 251 00:12:07,435 --> 00:12:09,437 I wish only to serve. 252 00:12:09,562 --> 00:12:10,438 Ah, good. 253 00:12:10,563 --> 00:12:12,857 I'll tell you frankly, the field had narrowed 254 00:12:12,982 --> 00:12:15,485 down to the principle of clay high and yourself. 255 00:12:15,610 --> 00:12:19,447 But I just discovered Jason Brill has two small children at home. 256 00:12:19,572 --> 00:12:23,910 And I feel it's wrong for a man to be away from his family when they're growing up. 257 00:12:24,035 --> 00:12:25,995 Oh, how right you are, Mr. Stone. 258 00:12:26,120 --> 00:12:27,497 It would be criminal. 259 00:12:27,622 --> 00:12:29,874 Of course, in the interest of better education, 260 00:12:29,999 --> 00:12:32,085 Brill, no doubt, would be willing to do it. 261 00:12:32,210 --> 00:12:35,588 Brill would be willing to do anything to butter up the board of... Mr... 262 00:12:35,713 --> 00:12:39,217 Mr. Brill, like myself, is an eager servant of the public school system. 263 00:12:44,681 --> 00:12:47,517 Now, about your own family, Conklin... 264 00:12:47,642 --> 00:12:49,018 You have a daughter, haven't you? 265 00:12:49,143 --> 00:12:51,938 Oh, yes, yes, but she's a grown girl, sir, 266 00:12:52,063 --> 00:12:55,233 quite capable of managing our entire household. 267 00:12:55,358 --> 00:12:56,859 She's a great help to her mother. 268 00:12:56,985 --> 00:12:58,069 Ah, splendid. 269 00:12:58,194 --> 00:13:00,446 And that's all the family you have? 270 00:13:00,571 --> 00:13:01,906 Every last one. 271 00:13:02,031 --> 00:13:05,284 I am free and clear, and stand ready to offer the best that's in me to 272 00:13:05,410 --> 00:13:09,038 further the principles of youth education to which I have dedicated my life. 273 00:13:11,708 --> 00:13:15,628 I shall give unstintingly to the... Oh, you won't be giving exactly. 274 00:13:15,753 --> 00:13:19,507 The position carries a handsome bit of remuneration with it. 275 00:13:19,632 --> 00:13:22,135 Who cares what the remuneration is? 276 00:13:22,260 --> 00:13:25,430 My thoughts are only of service. 277 00:13:25,555 --> 00:13:27,890 For the length of time you serve in this new 278 00:13:28,016 --> 00:13:30,977 capacity, you'll receive an additional $100 per month. 279 00:13:31,102 --> 00:13:31,853 I thought it was $150. 280 00:13:31,978 --> 00:13:36,941 No matter. 281 00:13:37,066 --> 00:13:38,568 Mine not to reason why. 282 00:13:38,693 --> 00:13:42,238 Mine... Oh, come in. 283 00:13:42,363 --> 00:13:45,241 Mr. Conklin, we just... Oh, hello, Mr. Stone. 284 00:13:45,366 --> 00:13:46,534 I didn't know you were here. 285 00:13:46,659 --> 00:13:47,577 How do you do, Miss Brooks? 286 00:13:47,702 --> 00:13:48,411 Mr. Boynton? 287 00:13:48,536 --> 00:13:50,038 Hello, Mr. Stone. 288 00:13:50,163 --> 00:13:51,664 What is it you wanted, folks? 289 00:13:51,789 --> 00:13:55,543 We just dropped in to present you with this little something. 290 00:13:55,668 --> 00:13:57,462 What little something? 291 00:13:57,587 --> 00:14:00,923 This little something for your little something. 292 00:14:01,049 --> 00:14:02,550 But I... I don't understand. 293 00:14:02,675 --> 00:14:09,682 Rock-a-bye baby in the treetop... Will you please stop that noxious moaning? 294 00:14:13,811 --> 00:14:16,481 And just tell me what's in that box. 295 00:14:16,606 --> 00:14:19,442 It's something that should come in very handy, Mr. Conklin. 296 00:14:19,567 --> 00:14:21,903 And it's one of the best of its kind, sir. 297 00:14:22,028 --> 00:14:26,157 It has collapsible legs and very strong canvas across the top and sides. 298 00:14:26,282 --> 00:14:30,787 It's rubberized throughout, just in case of accidents, if you know what I mean. 299 00:14:30,912 --> 00:14:32,997 And I am sure I do not. 300 00:14:33,122 --> 00:14:36,250 Well, that sounds like a baffinet to me. 301 00:14:36,375 --> 00:14:40,630 That's just what it is, a bath-a-net. 302 00:14:43,382 --> 00:14:45,051 He's like a fanatic. 303 00:14:45,176 --> 00:14:48,513 Miss Brooks, for whom is this bath-a-net intended? 304 00:14:48,638 --> 00:14:50,515 Why, for you, Mr. Conklin. 305 00:14:50,640 --> 00:14:51,557 For me? 306 00:14:51,682 --> 00:14:56,979 The last time I got into one of those, I broke it to pieces. 307 00:14:57,105 --> 00:14:59,273 I was a very big baby. 308 00:14:59,398 --> 00:15:01,734 And something of a family joke. 309 00:15:01,859 --> 00:15:04,112 I'll just put it back here for you, sir. 310 00:15:04,237 --> 00:15:06,531 This isn't literally for you, sir. 311 00:15:06,656 --> 00:15:12,578 It's for your... your... Conklin. 312 00:15:12,703 --> 00:15:15,164 Do you have a new baby in your home? 313 00:15:15,289 --> 00:15:17,416 I most certainly do not. 314 00:15:17,542 --> 00:15:20,128 Well, not right at the moment, but it won't be long now. 315 00:15:20,253 --> 00:15:27,301 Miss Brooks, if you think that you're cooking... Well... Pardon me, Mr. Conklin. 316 00:15:27,426 --> 00:15:30,847 But a lady just stopped me in the hall and asked me to bring this into your office. 317 00:15:30,972 --> 00:15:33,432 Bring what into my office, Denton? 318 00:15:33,558 --> 00:15:34,308 This. 319 00:15:34,433 --> 00:15:35,685 What? 320 00:15:35,810 --> 00:15:37,186 It's a baby. 321 00:15:37,311 --> 00:15:38,771 Where did you get it, Walter? 322 00:15:38,896 --> 00:15:39,480 Well, I told you. 323 00:15:39,605 --> 00:15:41,399 A lady said to bring it in here. 324 00:15:41,524 --> 00:15:43,484 She said Harriet knew all about it. 325 00:15:43,609 --> 00:15:45,027 Well, Harriet's your daughter, isn't she? 326 00:15:45,153 --> 00:15:47,488 Well, yes, but why she should tell the lady? 327 00:15:47,613 --> 00:15:49,031 For heaven's sake. 328 00:15:49,157 --> 00:15:50,992 Why, I'm ashamed of you, Conklin. 329 00:15:51,117 --> 00:15:56,789 Denying this handsome infant for a few paltry dollars. 330 00:15:56,914 --> 00:15:58,749 Oh, here, let me have him, Walter. 331 00:15:58,875 --> 00:15:59,959 Gladly. 332 00:16:00,084 --> 00:16:01,419 And out of my line, anyway. 333 00:16:01,544 --> 00:16:08,551 Yeah, I haven't done much babysitting since I... Oh, get out! 334 00:16:09,594 --> 00:16:10,469 Yes, sir. 335 00:16:10,595 --> 00:16:14,223 Bye, everybody. 336 00:16:14,348 --> 00:16:17,852 What is it, Mr. Conklin? 337 00:16:17,977 --> 00:16:19,228 A boy or a girl? 338 00:16:19,353 --> 00:16:22,523 I haven't the remotest notion. 339 00:16:22,648 --> 00:16:25,818 Why, this baby is eight or nine months old. 340 00:16:25,943 --> 00:16:29,113 Surely in that amount of time you could 341 00:16:29,238 --> 00:16:33,201 have at least taken the trouble to find out. 342 00:16:33,326 --> 00:16:36,871 But Mr. Stone, I never even heard about this baby until today. 343 00:16:36,996 --> 00:16:40,708 You mean Mrs. Conklin kept it from you all this time? 344 00:16:40,833 --> 00:16:41,626 Tired? 345 00:16:41,751 --> 00:16:44,128 That's the neatest trick of the year. 346 00:16:44,253 --> 00:16:48,090 Mrs. Conklin had absolutely nothing to do with it. 347 00:16:48,216 --> 00:16:51,302 No, that's the neatest trick of the year. 348 00:16:51,427 --> 00:16:52,470 Oh, what is all this? 349 00:16:52,595 --> 00:16:53,471 Oh, no, no, no. 350 00:16:53,596 --> 00:16:54,347 I remember now. 351 00:16:54,472 --> 00:16:56,933 Mrs. McPherson is the mother of that baby. 352 00:16:57,058 --> 00:16:58,184 Mrs. McPherson? 353 00:16:58,309 --> 00:16:59,060 Yes. 354 00:16:59,185 --> 00:17:02,647 Oh, now you woke him up. 355 00:17:02,772 --> 00:17:05,024 There, there, darling. 356 00:17:05,149 --> 00:17:09,820 Miss Brooks will take care of you. 357 00:17:09,946 --> 00:17:14,408 You certainly have a way with little ones, Miss Brooks. 358 00:17:14,533 --> 00:17:16,118 With little ones, yes. 359 00:17:16,244 --> 00:17:18,955 There, he's quiet now, Mr. Conklin. 360 00:17:19,080 --> 00:17:20,164 Don't you want to hold him? 361 00:17:20,289 --> 00:17:21,582 Me? 362 00:17:21,707 --> 00:17:22,333 Here, baby. 363 00:17:22,458 --> 00:17:27,213 Want to see Daddy? 364 00:17:27,338 --> 00:17:28,297 Sorry, baby. 365 00:17:28,422 --> 00:17:29,507 I lost my head. 366 00:17:29,632 --> 00:17:31,676 Oh, I've had about enough of this. 367 00:17:31,801 --> 00:17:35,179 As head of the Board of Education, it's my duty to investigate you, Conklin. 368 00:17:35,304 --> 00:17:36,222 Investigate me? 369 00:17:36,347 --> 00:17:37,640 But I have nothing to hide. 370 00:17:37,765 --> 00:17:38,307 Oh, no? 371 00:17:38,432 --> 00:17:40,434 Then tell me quickly, what is the baby's name? 372 00:17:40,559 --> 00:17:41,727 I don't know its name. 373 00:17:41,852 --> 00:17:44,188 Oh, these stubborn denials will get you nowhere. 374 00:17:44,313 --> 00:17:47,900 Is the baby's name Linda, Marie, or Peggy? 375 00:17:48,025 --> 00:17:52,947 Or is it Judy, Pamela, or Pearl? 376 00:17:53,072 --> 00:17:56,492 Is it Sam, Joe, Pete? 377 00:17:59,537 --> 00:18:01,539 Well, we've accomplished one thing. 378 00:18:01,664 --> 00:18:04,750 We've established it's sex. 379 00:18:07,295 --> 00:18:07,586 Oh, I'm sorry. 380 00:18:07,712 --> 00:18:09,797 I forgot you were here. 381 00:18:09,922 --> 00:18:11,048 Oh, what now? 382 00:18:11,173 --> 00:18:11,590 Come in! 383 00:18:11,716 --> 00:18:13,551 Daddy, daddy, he's here! 384 00:18:13,676 --> 00:18:14,468 He's here! 385 00:18:14,593 --> 00:18:15,720 Who's here? 386 00:18:15,845 --> 00:18:17,013 Baby! 387 00:18:17,138 --> 00:18:18,431 Another one? 388 00:18:18,556 --> 00:18:19,515 Conklin! 389 00:18:19,640 --> 00:18:22,518 What manner of man are you, denying a nursery full 390 00:18:22,643 --> 00:18:25,521 of children for a small professional advancement? 391 00:18:25,646 --> 00:18:27,648 But Mr. Stone, you don't understand. 392 00:18:27,773 --> 00:18:28,899 Oh, wait till you see him, folks. 393 00:18:29,025 --> 00:18:30,568 He's just adorable. 394 00:18:30,693 --> 00:18:32,278 I've already held him in my arms. 395 00:18:32,403 --> 00:18:34,280 Oh, it must have been thrilling, Harriet. 396 00:18:34,405 --> 00:18:36,991 Oh, thrilling isn't the word for it, Miss Brooks. 397 00:18:37,116 --> 00:18:44,123 I can't describe the sensation when I felt those tan, hairy little fingers on my neck. 398 00:18:45,291 --> 00:18:51,047 That's Mr. Conklin's boy, all right. 399 00:18:51,172 --> 00:18:54,717 Oh, Conklin, when I think how you would have condemned Jason 400 00:18:54,842 --> 00:18:58,304 Brill for accepting this appointment, it makes me sick. 401 00:18:58,429 --> 00:19:00,556 I won't listen to another word. 402 00:19:00,681 --> 00:19:03,601 You'll hear from me next as chairman of the investigating committee. 403 00:19:03,726 --> 00:19:05,436 I'll see you later, Conklin. 404 00:19:05,561 --> 00:19:06,812 Yes, indeed, I will. 405 00:19:06,937 --> 00:19:09,231 You've got day, sir. 406 00:19:10,232 --> 00:19:11,692 Well, what's wrong with him, Daddy? 407 00:19:11,817 --> 00:19:13,110 Yes, what's wrong with him? 408 00:19:13,235 --> 00:19:14,111 What's wrong with him? 409 00:19:14,236 --> 00:19:18,115 What's wrong with him? 410 00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:20,618 He thinks I have two children I don't have. 411 00:19:20,743 --> 00:19:22,495 That's what's wrong with him. 412 00:19:22,620 --> 00:19:24,372 Please, Mr. Conklin, calm down. 413 00:19:24,497 --> 00:19:27,291 Yes, we don't care if they're not your children. 414 00:19:27,416 --> 00:19:28,793 Miss Brooks. 415 00:19:28,918 --> 00:19:32,296 I have lost an important position because of your ridiculous assumption 416 00:19:32,421 --> 00:19:35,925 which led you and Mr. Boynton to present me with that ridiculous gift. 417 00:19:38,135 --> 00:19:40,012 Well, don't blame it all on us. 418 00:19:40,137 --> 00:19:42,181 Harriet just told us about the other baby. 419 00:19:42,306 --> 00:19:45,601 The other baby happens to be a ring-tailed 420 00:19:45,726 --> 00:19:49,605 monkey palmed off on us by my sister-in-law. 421 00:19:49,730 --> 00:19:52,900 And the creature in your arms was donated by Mrs. 422 00:19:53,025 --> 00:19:56,987 McPherson to give the home economics class a live model. 423 00:19:57,113 --> 00:19:58,072 Well? 424 00:19:58,197 --> 00:20:01,492 Now that you are so completely aware of all the facts 425 00:20:01,617 --> 00:20:05,371 in this grim farce, what do you propose to do about it? 426 00:20:05,496 --> 00:20:07,456 What about you, Mr. Boynton? 427 00:20:07,581 --> 00:20:13,963 As co-perpetrator of this outrage, what have you to say? 428 00:20:16,173 --> 00:20:19,760 Splendid. 429 00:20:19,885 --> 00:20:21,345 And now, Miss Brooks, 430 00:20:21,470 --> 00:20:23,597 May I hear from you? 431 00:20:23,722 --> 00:20:25,141 Certainly, Mr. Conklin. 432 00:20:25,266 --> 00:20:28,853 I... Whoop! 433 00:20:30,855 --> 00:20:30,855 Whoop! 434 00:20:30,980 --> 00:20:31,021 Whoop! 435 00:20:31,147 --> 00:20:31,147 Whoop! 436 00:20:31,272 --> 00:20:31,272 Whoop! 437 00:20:31,397 --> 00:20:31,439 Whoop! 438 00:20:31,564 --> 00:20:31,564 Whoop! 439 00:20:31,689 --> 00:20:31,689 Whoop! 440 00:20:31,814 --> 00:20:31,856 Whoop! 441 00:20:31,981 --> 00:20:31,981 Whoop! 442 00:20:32,106 --> 00:20:32,148 Whoop! 443 00:20:32,273 --> 00:20:32,273 Whoop! 444 00:20:32,398 --> 00:20:32,398 Whoop! 445 00:20:32,523 --> 00:20:32,565 Whoop! 446 00:20:32,690 --> 00:20:32,690 Whoop! 447 00:20:32,815 --> 00:20:33,190 Whoop! 448 00:20:33,315 --> 00:20:33,524 Whoop! 449 00:20:33,649 --> 00:20:33,858 Whoop! 450 00:20:33,983 --> 00:20:34,108 Whoop! 451 00:20:34,233 --> 00:20:34,608 Whoop! 452 00:20:34,733 --> 00:20:34,775 Whoop! 453 00:20:34,900 --> 00:20:35,025 Whoop! 454 00:20:35,151 --> 00:20:35,317 Whoop! 455 00:20:35,443 --> 00:20:35,609 Whoop! 456 00:20:35,734 --> 00:20:36,068 Whoop! 457 00:20:36,193 --> 00:20:36,360 Whoop! 458 00:20:36,485 --> 00:20:38,028 Whoop! 459 00:20:38,154 --> 00:20:38,154 Whoop! 460 00:20:38,279 --> 00:20:38,320 Whoop! 461 00:20:38,446 --> 00:20:38,446 Whoop! 462 00:20:38,571 --> 00:20:38,654 Whoop! 463 00:20:38,779 --> 00:20:38,988 Whoop! 464 00:20:39,113 --> 00:20:39,363 Whoop! 465 00:20:39,488 --> 00:20:40,489 Whoop! 466 00:20:41,574 --> 00:20:41,574 Whoop! 467 00:20:41,699 --> 00:20:41,699 Whoop! 468 00:20:41,824 --> 00:20:41,866 Whoop! 469 00:20:41,991 --> 00:20:41,991 Whoop! 470 00:20:42,116 --> 00:20:42,158 Whoop! 471 00:20:42,283 --> 00:20:42,408 Whoop! 472 00:20:42,533 --> 00:20:42,575 Whoop! 473 00:20:42,700 --> 00:20:42,867 Whoop! 474 00:20:42,992 --> 00:20:43,033 Whoop! 475 00:20:43,159 --> 00:20:43,242 Whoop! 476 00:20:43,367 --> 00:20:43,451 Whoop! 477 00:20:43,576 --> 00:20:43,701 Whoop! 478 00:20:43,826 --> 00:20:43,951 Whoop! 479 00:20:44,076 --> 00:20:44,160 Whoop! 480 00:20:44,285 --> 00:20:44,368 Whoop! 481 00:20:44,493 --> 00:20:44,618 Whoop! 482 00:20:44,743 --> 00:20:44,994 Whoop! 483 00:20:45,119 --> 00:20:45,244 Whoop! 484 00:20:45,369 --> 00:20:45,453 Whoop! 485 00:20:45,578 --> 00:20:45,703 Whoop! 486 00:20:45,828 --> 00:20:45,995 Whoop! 487 00:20:46,120 --> 00:20:46,745 Whoop! 488 00:20:46,871 --> 00:20:46,996 Whoop! 489 00:20:47,121 --> 00:20:47,163 Whoop! 490 00:20:47,288 --> 00:20:47,329 Whoop! 491 00:20:47,455 --> 00:20:47,455 Whoop! 492 00:20:47,580 --> 00:20:48,080 Whoop! 493 00:20:48,205 --> 00:20:48,372 Whoop! 494 00:20:48,497 --> 00:20:48,664 Whoop! 495 00:20:48,789 --> 00:20:48,831 Whoop! 496 00:20:48,956 --> 00:20:49,123 Whoop! 497 00:20:49,248 --> 00:20:49,331 Whoop! 498 00:20:49,457 --> 00:20:49,540 Whoop! 499 00:20:49,665 --> 00:20:49,790 Whoop! 500 00:20:49,915 --> 00:20:49,999 Whoop! 501 00:20:50,124 --> 00:20:50,458 Who 502 00:20:50,583 --> 00:20:52,001 Well, he'll get over it. 503 00:20:52,126 --> 00:20:53,002 He always does. 504 00:20:53,127 --> 00:20:55,963 Say, I was thinking it's such a lovely evening. 505 00:20:56,088 --> 00:20:58,466 Would you care to go for a stroll in the park? 506 00:20:58,591 --> 00:21:02,219 Oh, I'd love to, Mr. Boyden, but I have a previous engagement. 507 00:21:02,344 --> 00:21:04,680 Mrs. Davis and I have a guest here, and I 508 00:21:04,805 --> 00:21:07,349 was just about to start for a walk with him. 509 00:21:07,475 --> 00:21:08,559 Oh. 510 00:21:08,684 --> 00:21:11,270 Well, some other time then, Miss Brooks. 511 00:21:11,395 --> 00:21:12,146 See you tomorrow. 512 00:21:12,271 --> 00:21:15,441 Good night, Mr. Boyden. 513 00:21:15,566 --> 00:21:18,652 I'm ready whenever you are. 514 00:21:24,617 --> 00:21:31,624 Now remember, baby, don't drop the peel till we get right in front of Mr. Conklin. 515 00:22:05,241 --> 00:22:06,242 You 515 00:22:07,305 --> 00:23:07,858 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org