"SNL50: Beyond Saturday Night" Five Minutes

1 00:00:10,410 --> 00:00:12,912 - I'ma sit like this. - Yeah. Sounds good. 2 00:00:13,013 --> 00:00:15,482 I feel relaxed. 3 00:00:15,582 --> 00:00:18,451 Man, you gonna know about everything, man. 4 00:00:19,552 --> 00:00:20,587 I'ma open up. 5 00:00:21,521 --> 00:00:25,091 My best friend Al, we was sellin' crack. 6 00:00:25,191 --> 00:00:26,760 He used to say, "Yo, Tray, you mad funny. 7 00:00:26,860 --> 00:00:29,963 You should be at The Apollo." I said, "Shut the fuck up, Al, 8 00:00:30,063 --> 00:00:31,197 and keep baggin' up." 9 00:00:31,297 --> 00:00:33,933 Four months later, I was on Def Jam. 10 00:00:34,034 --> 00:00:35,769 Comedy found me. I ain't find comedy. 11 00:00:35,869 --> 00:00:38,605 People were asking me all the time, "When did it start?" 12 00:00:38,705 --> 00:00:42,475 It started in 1968 when my mother's water broke. 13 00:00:42,575 --> 00:00:45,979 That's when it started. That's when shit hit the fan. 14 00:00:46,079 --> 00:00:50,483 Anybody could do comedy. I could teach all y'all in here how to tell jokes and do comedy. 15 00:00:50,583 --> 00:00:52,452 But are you funny? 16 00:00:53,086 --> 00:00:55,155 It was the biggest show ever. 17 00:00:55,255 --> 00:00:57,724 The biggest thing to happen to television 18 00:00:57,824 --> 00:00:59,159 is Saturday Night Live. 19 00:00:59,259 --> 00:01:01,194 They took sketch comedy to a whole 'nother level 20 00:01:01,294 --> 00:01:02,996 and made it an institution. 21 00:01:03,096 --> 00:01:05,665 Chevy's there. Billy Murray's there. 22 00:01:05,765 --> 00:01:06,966 And Gilda Radner. 23 00:01:07,067 --> 00:01:09,436 Comedy slowly became rock and roll. 24 00:01:09,536 --> 00:01:12,072 And I wanted to be part of that rock and roll. 25 00:01:12,172 --> 00:01:14,507 Hewo. I'm Baba Wawa. 26 00:01:14,607 --> 00:01:16,976 This show came on, and it was so irreverent. 27 00:01:17,077 --> 00:01:18,545 Jane, you ignorant slut. 28 00:01:18,645 --> 00:01:21,715 It was so raw. Really, honestly, there was nothing like it. 29 00:01:21,815 --> 00:01:25,752 -Our top story tonight... -Our top story tonight... 30 00:01:25,852 --> 00:01:29,055 Every person falls in love with SNL when they're 13, 14, 31 00:01:29,155 --> 00:01:31,091 and they feel like, "That's my cast." 32 00:01:31,191 --> 00:01:32,992 Dana Carvey, Jan Hooks, 33 00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:34,828 Phil Hartman, that was my cast. 34 00:01:34,928 --> 00:01:36,730 I remember Farley... 35 00:01:36,830 --> 00:01:39,165 How can we get back on the right track? 36 00:01:39,265 --> 00:01:41,301 He makes people so happy. Wayne's World... 37 00:01:41,401 --> 00:01:43,536 - Schwing! - Hans and Franz... 38 00:01:43,636 --> 00:01:45,372 ...to pump you up. 39 00:01:45,472 --> 00:01:47,874 That was the first time I saw something different 40 00:01:47,974 --> 00:01:49,476 where comedy was concerned. 41 00:01:49,576 --> 00:01:53,279 I just thought, "Oh, that's what I do, sketch." 42 00:01:53,380 --> 00:01:55,982 The show had so much weird stuff, 43 00:01:56,082 --> 00:02:00,487 I thought SNL was sending me a secret message with Sprockets and all that stuff. 44 00:02:00,587 --> 00:02:03,323 Before I begin, would you like to touch my monkey? 45 00:02:03,423 --> 00:02:05,825 -I would be honored. -Touch him! Love him! 46 00:02:08,395 --> 00:02:10,196 I know everyone's laughing, 47 00:02:10,296 --> 00:02:11,765 but this sketch is written for me. 48 00:02:11,865 --> 00:02:16,002 The first time I remember watching SNL with my parents 49 00:02:16,102 --> 00:02:17,771 was they showed me Celebrity Hot Tub. 50 00:02:17,871 --> 00:02:21,875 * Hey, too hot in the hot tub * 51 00:02:21,975 --> 00:02:23,910 * Burn myself... * 52 00:02:24,010 --> 00:02:25,812 You see somebody like Eddie Murphy 53 00:02:25,912 --> 00:02:28,148 who was on that show... 54 00:02:28,248 --> 00:02:30,050 you would gravitate towards his energy. 55 00:02:30,150 --> 00:02:32,018 * Gonna get in the hot tub * 56 00:02:32,118 --> 00:02:33,620 * Gonna get it wet-ah * 57 00:02:33,720 --> 00:02:35,522 * Good God! Hey! * 58 00:02:35,622 --> 00:02:38,825 That even ignited my fuel more to wanna be on the show. 59 00:02:38,925 --> 00:02:42,896 This is how you answer a door in my neighborhood. 60 00:02:42,996 --> 00:02:44,431 Who is it? 61 00:02:44,531 --> 00:02:47,200 For a long time, 62 00:02:47,300 --> 00:02:49,469 the show had always been like, there's a cast. 63 00:02:49,569 --> 00:02:51,204 Cast ends. It restarts. 64 00:02:51,304 --> 00:02:53,273 Then all of a sudden, this process started 65 00:02:53,373 --> 00:02:55,408 where people would be folded in. 66 00:02:55,508 --> 00:02:59,112 So when that started, there would be auditions. 67 00:02:59,212 --> 00:03:00,213 Hi. I'm Bobby Moynihan. 68 00:03:00,313 --> 00:03:01,815 Hi. I'm Nasim Pedrad. 69 00:03:01,915 --> 00:03:04,250 Hi. I'm Pete Davidson. 70 00:03:04,351 --> 00:03:06,386 They pull the stage out. It was blacked out 71 00:03:06,486 --> 00:03:08,688 so you can't see them. It was terrifying, 72 00:03:08,788 --> 00:03:12,225 'cause when you audition, there's like three people there. 73 00:03:12,325 --> 00:03:14,461 It's a very nerve-racking day. 74 00:03:14,561 --> 00:03:16,963 I think a lot of them come in terrified. 75 00:03:17,063 --> 00:03:18,498 They've never been here before. 76 00:03:18,598 --> 00:03:20,367 -I was so nervous. -So nervous. 77 00:03:20,467 --> 00:03:22,168 My first audition, I threw up. 78 00:03:22,268 --> 00:03:24,971 There's a table that's right about over there, 79 00:03:25,071 --> 00:03:27,374 and this is a pretty big space. 80 00:03:27,474 --> 00:03:29,943 I think you expect a certain amount of nervousness, 81 00:03:30,043 --> 00:03:31,444 and there's charm in that, 82 00:03:31,544 --> 00:03:33,646 unless your personality is to be slick. 83 00:03:33,747 --> 00:03:36,883 Like Bill Murray, I bet he was slick, and it was extra funny. 84 00:03:36,983 --> 00:03:39,319 Hi. I'm Bob, and I do tricks. 85 00:03:39,419 --> 00:03:41,521 You have five minutes. Just do whatever you want. 86 00:03:41,621 --> 00:03:44,124 I had to do five characters in five minutes. 87 00:03:44,224 --> 00:03:45,392 -I got five minutes. -Five minutes. 88 00:03:45,492 --> 00:03:46,993 -Five minutes. -Five minutes. 89 00:03:47,093 --> 00:03:48,461 The truth is, if they can't handle 90 00:03:48,561 --> 00:03:51,097 five minutes in front of everyone live, 91 00:03:51,197 --> 00:03:52,999 then you're wasting time. 92 00:03:53,099 --> 00:03:55,468 Good luck. Five minutes. 93 00:03:56,670 --> 00:04:00,573 Five seconds. Four, three, two... 94 00:04:00,974 --> 00:04:02,475 Hi. My name is Tracy Morgan. 95 00:04:02,575 --> 00:04:04,844 I'd like to introduce you to one of my friends. 96 00:04:04,944 --> 00:04:05,879 His name is Biscuit. 97 00:04:08,615 --> 00:04:10,884 Wow. Wow. 98 00:04:12,018 --> 00:04:13,353 Hi. 99 00:04:14,020 --> 00:04:16,056 My name is Biscuit. 100 00:04:16,156 --> 00:04:18,191 And my teacher, Miss Soto, 101 00:04:18,291 --> 00:04:21,161 said for me to read y'all a Christmas poem. 102 00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:22,896 This is it. 103 00:04:22,996 --> 00:04:26,166 This is crazy! This is crazy. 104 00:04:26,266 --> 00:04:28,968 The name of my Christmas poem is 105 00:04:29,069 --> 00:04:31,037 "This is My Christmas Poem." 106 00:04:31,137 --> 00:04:32,339 I remember when I wrote this. 107 00:04:32,439 --> 00:04:34,407 "'Twas the night before Christmas, 108 00:04:34,507 --> 00:04:36,242 and all through the house, 109 00:04:36,343 --> 00:04:37,911 not a creature was stirrin', 110 00:04:38,011 --> 00:04:41,247 not even my Uncle Hook that sleep on the couch..." 111 00:04:41,348 --> 00:04:42,749 Wow! 112 00:04:42,849 --> 00:04:44,150 "As I sit in my room 113 00:04:44,250 --> 00:04:45,919 and write my Christmas list, 114 00:04:46,019 --> 00:04:49,856 please, Santa, bring me a Power Ranger glove that fit... 115 00:04:50,590 --> 00:04:53,360 with the attachable brass knuckle kit." 116 00:04:53,460 --> 00:04:56,296 I don't know what Lorne Michaels and them saw. 117 00:04:56,396 --> 00:04:58,164 They saw something. 118 00:04:58,698 --> 00:05:01,901 I remember Lorne saying to me, 119 00:05:02,002 --> 00:05:03,837 "You're not given the job. 120 00:05:04,270 --> 00:05:05,338 You take the job." 121 00:05:05,438 --> 00:05:08,274 So I just sort of took the job 122 00:05:08,375 --> 00:05:10,110 that I was gonna find new cast members. 123 00:05:10,210 --> 00:05:12,912 I got to kinda know the stand-ups 124 00:05:13,013 --> 00:05:14,981 and go to comedy clubs. 125 00:05:15,081 --> 00:05:17,550 I was in the scene. 126 00:05:17,650 --> 00:05:20,320 I saw Casualties of War. There's a charming movie. 127 00:05:20,420 --> 00:05:23,757 Michael J. Fox is in it, and he doesn't like what's going on. 128 00:05:24,157 --> 00:05:25,892 "Hey, Sarge, uh... 129 00:05:28,828 --> 00:05:30,830 ...what are we doing here exactly?" 130 00:05:30,930 --> 00:05:33,833 You know, people say, "Where's your big break?" 131 00:05:33,933 --> 00:05:36,569 But they're all really just microscopic breaks 132 00:05:36,670 --> 00:05:39,205 along the way. Getting in at The Improv, 133 00:05:39,305 --> 00:05:40,573 getting my first road gig. 134 00:05:40,674 --> 00:05:42,609 Never thinking I'd be good enough to be on SNL. 135 00:05:42,709 --> 00:05:44,678 So getting to that was a huge deal. 136 00:05:44,778 --> 00:05:46,980 I remember going to Chicago with Lorne. 137 00:05:47,080 --> 00:05:48,715 I think it was all in one night. 138 00:05:48,815 --> 00:05:51,818 We saw Farley and Meadows at Second City. 139 00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:55,822 And then Rock and Sandler at a stand-up club. 140 00:05:55,922 --> 00:05:58,658 My friend said, "Ask her out. The worst she can say is no," 141 00:05:58,758 --> 00:06:01,561 so I asked her out and she said, "Get away from me, you loser." 142 00:06:01,661 --> 00:06:03,496 We were in the improv and sketch group 143 00:06:03,596 --> 00:06:07,334 making videos, doing live shows at places like UCB. 144 00:06:07,434 --> 00:06:08,568 -UCB. -UCB. 145 00:06:08,668 --> 00:06:10,303 They came to a show at The Groundlings. 146 00:06:10,403 --> 00:06:11,504 The Groundlings. 147 00:06:11,604 --> 00:06:13,306 You're watching a ton of tapes, 148 00:06:13,406 --> 00:06:16,242 ton of videos, seeing people in person, 149 00:06:16,343 --> 00:06:18,178 curating showcases, 150 00:06:18,278 --> 00:06:20,280 and then picking people 151 00:06:20,380 --> 00:06:22,582 to come to the studio to test. 152 00:06:23,583 --> 00:06:26,353 When I heard that I was getting the audition, 153 00:06:26,453 --> 00:06:29,589 and just kept going over it back and forth, 154 00:06:29,689 --> 00:06:31,658 just over it, back and forth. 155 00:06:31,758 --> 00:06:34,327 Adding whatever, giving a little line here. 156 00:06:34,427 --> 00:06:36,896 I just rehearsed over and over and over again. 157 00:06:36,996 --> 00:06:39,299 Going up at stand-up, going up at The Improv, 158 00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:40,467 and just hone it down. 159 00:06:40,567 --> 00:06:41,801 Hone it, make it tighter. 160 00:06:41,901 --> 00:06:43,870 Revising it and making it better and better. 161 00:06:43,970 --> 00:06:46,406 I have put this up every way I can think of 162 00:06:46,506 --> 00:06:47,741 and perfected this. 163 00:06:48,408 --> 00:06:50,477 Everyone wants you to succeed. 164 00:06:50,577 --> 00:06:52,946 All we want is for you to be hilarious, 165 00:06:53,046 --> 00:06:57,751 because it's only good for us if you do great out there. 166 00:06:57,851 --> 00:07:00,353 They put you in the dressing rooms, 167 00:07:00,453 --> 00:07:03,356 and I could hear the auditions. 168 00:07:03,456 --> 00:07:04,924 I knew some of the people auditioning, 169 00:07:05,025 --> 00:07:07,727 and I could hear their auditions, and I was going, 170 00:07:07,827 --> 00:07:10,697 "Oh, shit," you know. And they were really good. 171 00:07:10,797 --> 00:07:14,701 I was in Colin Jost and Michael Che's dressing room while I waited. 172 00:07:15,368 --> 00:07:20,140 I remember getting called. You moved down to a room that's closer to the stage. 173 00:07:20,240 --> 00:07:23,376 They were like, "They're ready for you," and my heart starts racing. 174 00:07:23,476 --> 00:07:25,111 And we're standing under the bleachers. 175 00:07:25,211 --> 00:07:28,548 A man I now know as Chris Kelly, who was our stage manager-- 176 00:07:28,648 --> 00:07:32,118 At the time it was just some White guy with a headset on 177 00:07:32,218 --> 00:07:35,655 who was talking to me about Maryland crab cakes one second. 178 00:07:35,755 --> 00:07:37,657 Next minute, he's like, "You're gonna get started." 179 00:07:37,757 --> 00:07:40,694 My brain short-circuited, and I don't remember 180 00:07:40,794 --> 00:07:43,730 what that man said to me. Everything was moving so fast. 181 00:07:43,830 --> 00:07:46,199 You're just like, "This is happening. I'm here. I'm testing. 182 00:07:46,299 --> 00:07:49,169 I'm in New York. It's about to happen. Lorne's about to watch me." 183 00:07:49,269 --> 00:07:52,739 He was giving me instructions on what to do on stage, and I'm like, "What's happening? 184 00:07:52,839 --> 00:07:54,641 How did you make that switch so quickly? 185 00:07:54,741 --> 00:07:56,676 If I knew that you were gonna switch that quickly, 186 00:07:56,776 --> 00:07:59,112 I wouldn't have engaged you about the crabs." 187 00:07:59,212 --> 00:08:01,815 So I walk out on that stage and I cannot remember, 188 00:08:01,915 --> 00:08:04,084 and I heard him, the words in my head. 189 00:08:04,184 --> 00:08:07,387 He said, "Say your name at the beginning of your test," 190 00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:09,289 or "at the end of your test." 191 00:08:09,389 --> 00:08:11,925 I could not remember what he said. 192 00:08:12,025 --> 00:08:14,661 At the end I was like, "Just make sure you say your name, bitch." 193 00:08:14,761 --> 00:08:16,062 -Andy Samberg. -Heidi Gardner. 194 00:08:16,162 --> 00:08:17,731 -Joe Piscopo. -Cheri Oteri. -Kyle Mooney. 195 00:08:17,831 --> 00:08:19,332 -Beck Bennett. -Bill Hader. -Kristen Wiig. 196 00:08:19,432 --> 00:08:20,567 -Will Ferrell. -I'm Ego Nwodim. 197 00:08:20,967 --> 00:08:24,938 I know why the caged bird sings. 198 00:08:25,038 --> 00:08:28,108 Yo mama so fat, 199 00:08:28,208 --> 00:08:29,943 she lifted her dress, 200 00:08:30,043 --> 00:08:32,479 and out of the curve of her waist 201 00:08:32,579 --> 00:08:35,648 and the span of her hips came... 202 00:08:36,316 --> 00:08:37,817 generations. 203 00:08:39,252 --> 00:08:40,520 This is your cousin 204 00:08:40,620 --> 00:08:42,789 that you haven't seen in 25 years. 205 00:08:43,490 --> 00:08:48,194 Man! We got a lotta catchin' up to do. 206 00:08:48,561 --> 00:08:53,233 Uh, so... do you still go swimmin'? 207 00:08:53,333 --> 00:08:54,868 Yeah? In the pool? 208 00:08:54,968 --> 00:08:57,704 I really went back to, like, the playbook, 209 00:08:57,804 --> 00:09:00,440 and the whole time I'd been at Groundlings 210 00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:02,776 I was like, "These are my bangers. 211 00:09:02,876 --> 00:09:05,779 These are the things that always work, always hit." 212 00:09:05,879 --> 00:09:09,015 I wanted to be undeniable, so I did 12 in five minutes. 213 00:09:09,115 --> 00:09:13,153 This is Kristen Schaal delivering bad news. 214 00:09:13,253 --> 00:09:18,958 Hey, Mom. So, Dad's not gonna make it. 215 00:09:19,059 --> 00:09:22,662 Yeah, I mean, I guess it spread through his whole body. 216 00:09:22,762 --> 00:09:26,633 I mean, I'm not crying, but I'm definitely in shock. 217 00:09:26,733 --> 00:09:30,203 I'm devastated. Oh, shit. I gotta go. 218 00:09:30,303 --> 00:09:32,238 Yeah. He died. 219 00:09:32,339 --> 00:09:34,107 Oh God. 220 00:09:37,177 --> 00:09:39,079 What does well on our show is somebody 221 00:09:39,179 --> 00:09:41,548 that's really funny in a way that you haven't seen. 222 00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:50,957 Tell Don Jacobs to hold. Yes. No, I'm busy. Thank you. 223 00:09:51,758 --> 00:09:54,494 Or that you have seen, but they do it differently. 224 00:09:54,594 --> 00:09:56,930 When you see it, you know it. 225 00:09:57,030 --> 00:09:59,265 Who wants a burger? These are just about... 226 00:09:59,366 --> 00:10:00,467 just about done here. 227 00:10:00,567 --> 00:10:03,136 Get off the goddamn shed! 228 00:10:03,236 --> 00:10:04,871 "Get Off the Shed" was-- 229 00:10:04,971 --> 00:10:06,973 it was a sketch in his first show. 230 00:10:08,541 --> 00:10:10,643 I will punch you in the face 231 00:10:10,744 --> 00:10:12,879 if you don't get off the shed! 232 00:10:12,979 --> 00:10:16,149 There are some times that you see it and say, "Oh, 100 percent." 233 00:10:16,683 --> 00:10:18,885 -Kristen Wiig. -Every character 234 00:10:18,985 --> 00:10:21,821 that Kristen Wiig auditioned with has been on television. 235 00:10:21,921 --> 00:10:25,291 Excuse me. What is the in-flight film? 236 00:10:25,392 --> 00:10:28,428 The what? The Matrix: Reloaded? 237 00:10:28,528 --> 00:10:30,764 -Ugh. -Please welcome Aunt Linda. 238 00:10:32,932 --> 00:10:36,703 My next film is Alice in Wonderland. 239 00:10:37,771 --> 00:10:41,808 Or what I like to call it, Alice and Wonder If Someone Put LSD in My Crystal Light. 240 00:10:41,908 --> 00:10:44,344 What is happening in this thing? 241 00:10:44,444 --> 00:10:46,246 The checkout lady at Target. 242 00:10:49,049 --> 00:10:51,451 I'm sorry that I smelled your candle. 243 00:10:52,085 --> 00:10:55,388 Right now we're having a sale on all of our holiday candles. 244 00:10:55,488 --> 00:10:58,425 I hope someone walks up soon so I can say, "Welcome to Target." 245 00:10:58,525 --> 00:11:00,126 I wanna say, "Welcome to Target." 246 00:11:00,226 --> 00:11:01,961 Welcome to Target! 247 00:11:02,062 --> 00:11:03,863 Sometimes you'd see something in an audition and be like, 248 00:11:03,963 --> 00:11:05,932 "That could be in a sketch tomorrow." 249 00:11:06,032 --> 00:11:08,401 That was nice, right? To think about, "They could come in, 250 00:11:08,501 --> 00:11:11,171 and there's already multiple things you could put on the show immediately." 251 00:11:11,271 --> 00:11:15,041 So Miss Fitzgivens said that I had the right stuff! 252 00:11:15,141 --> 00:11:18,445 He's from the Brazilian rainforest. 253 00:11:18,545 --> 00:11:20,847 Hello. I'm Margaret Jo McCullough. 254 00:11:20,947 --> 00:11:23,116 And you're listening to Delicious Dish. 255 00:11:23,216 --> 00:11:25,785 No one can resist my Schweddy Balls. 256 00:11:26,386 --> 00:11:29,956 I'm the son! I'm the son's stunt double! Whoo! 257 00:11:30,056 --> 00:11:32,292 You know-- hah. You know, I can... 258 00:11:33,960 --> 00:11:36,363 I can always make time for you. 259 00:11:36,463 --> 00:11:38,732 I'm Will Smith. Whoo! 260 00:11:38,832 --> 00:11:40,734 Hi. I'm Fred Armisen. 261 00:11:40,834 --> 00:11:42,502 I remember when I first met Fred. 262 00:11:42,602 --> 00:11:46,006 I was in a meeting. I said, "I talked to that guy, Fred. 263 00:11:46,106 --> 00:11:48,308 He's great. We're gonna hire him. 264 00:11:48,408 --> 00:11:49,676 He might be crazy." 265 00:11:49,776 --> 00:11:51,077 You guys ready? 266 00:11:51,177 --> 00:11:53,480 I'm Fericito. Let's have a little beat going. 267 00:11:53,580 --> 00:11:55,515 Oh my God. I've never seen this. 268 00:11:55,615 --> 00:11:57,550 Jeez. 269 00:12:02,655 --> 00:12:04,457 Did you feel it? 270 00:12:04,557 --> 00:12:05,959 Did you feel the salsa? 271 00:12:06,059 --> 00:12:08,762 People think that Latin music is all about things like 272 00:12:08,862 --> 00:12:11,765 Shakira and Enrique Iglesias. 273 00:12:11,865 --> 00:12:13,867 But we have a lot more to offer. 274 00:12:13,967 --> 00:12:15,702 Like Menudo. 275 00:12:15,802 --> 00:12:17,937 Ay, dios mio! 276 00:12:18,038 --> 00:12:20,674 I used to go see Tito Puente in concert, 277 00:12:20,774 --> 00:12:22,776 and he would make these little jokes. 278 00:12:22,876 --> 00:12:25,745 "Did you feel it? Not you. Her!" 279 00:12:25,845 --> 00:12:27,947 It's almost like a little mini-obsession 280 00:12:28,048 --> 00:12:30,383 where I'm like, "What is this thing he does? 281 00:12:30,483 --> 00:12:33,119 I wanna try it. I wanna try a little bit of that." 282 00:12:33,219 --> 00:12:35,488 You knew that would be a character on the show, 283 00:12:35,588 --> 00:12:36,923 whether he was crazy or not. 284 00:12:37,023 --> 00:12:38,625 When I first moved to this country, 285 00:12:38,725 --> 00:12:40,126 I was in third grade, 286 00:12:40,226 --> 00:12:43,229 and the kids in my school were White, Americanos. 287 00:12:43,329 --> 00:12:46,332 And I noticed when I went to the urinal to take a leak, 288 00:12:46,433 --> 00:12:49,636 my pena was bigger than all the other kids'! 289 00:12:50,203 --> 00:12:52,272 So I went home to my grandmother and I said, "Abuelita, 290 00:12:52,372 --> 00:12:54,841 why is my pena bigger than all the other kids'? 291 00:12:54,941 --> 00:12:56,943 Because I'm Latino?" She said, "No. 292 00:12:57,043 --> 00:12:58,645 Because you're 23." 293 00:12:58,745 --> 00:13:01,414 Ay, dios mio! 294 00:13:04,351 --> 00:13:06,886 I had wanted to audition for so long. 295 00:13:06,986 --> 00:13:09,255 I got asked to audition, and I went into panic mode. 296 00:13:09,356 --> 00:13:12,959 I went into like, "No. Like, I'm not ready. 297 00:13:13,059 --> 00:13:15,729 Let me get my things in order, 298 00:13:15,829 --> 00:13:17,430 and I'll return to you with an answer." 299 00:13:17,530 --> 00:13:20,700 I weirdly didn't-- I didn't audition right away. 300 00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:22,302 Like, I worked on it for a year. 301 00:13:22,402 --> 00:13:25,405 I think what made me most ready for that audition 302 00:13:25,505 --> 00:13:26,873 was having no clue. 303 00:13:26,973 --> 00:13:30,010 Having no clue what I was about to get into. 304 00:13:30,110 --> 00:13:32,012 I remember walking down the hallway 305 00:13:32,112 --> 00:13:34,848 and seeing all the scaffolding in the studio 306 00:13:34,948 --> 00:13:38,184 and going, like, "I'm here. I'm on the set." 307 00:13:38,284 --> 00:13:41,421 And then we turned the corner and I saw the set and I was like, 308 00:13:41,521 --> 00:13:43,356 "Holy shit." 309 00:13:44,791 --> 00:13:47,160 - Ooh! - Oh no. 310 00:13:47,260 --> 00:13:50,530 Oh my God, do you smell that? 311 00:13:50,864 --> 00:13:52,932 It smells like peppa up in here! 312 00:13:53,033 --> 00:13:55,335 -Oh, Bobby. -Straight up, it smells like-- 313 00:13:55,435 --> 00:13:57,971 it smells like somebody put a big ole pile of peppa 314 00:13:58,071 --> 00:13:59,773 in the middle of the room, 315 00:13:59,873 --> 00:14:01,608 then sprayed that mess with hairspray, 316 00:14:01,708 --> 00:14:03,977 then lit that junk on fi-yah. 317 00:14:04,077 --> 00:14:07,213 This was just a guy I worked with. Yeah. 318 00:14:07,313 --> 00:14:11,651 Peppa, and a fan to blow that peppa round the room! 319 00:14:11,751 --> 00:14:13,253 You know what I'm sayin'? 320 00:14:13,353 --> 00:14:17,157 It's flyin' around the room like that bag from that movie. 321 00:14:17,257 --> 00:14:21,161 You know that famous bag. Everyone knows that famous bag. 322 00:14:21,261 --> 00:14:23,730 Oh my God, girl, that bag is amazing. 323 00:14:23,830 --> 00:14:26,032 That bag is amazing. 324 00:14:27,133 --> 00:14:28,935 I remember on my audition, 325 00:14:29,035 --> 00:14:32,072 right before I was going in, a guy came out 326 00:14:32,172 --> 00:14:34,207 who had just finished, and he looked at me 327 00:14:34,307 --> 00:14:36,376 and said, "Get ready. They don't laugh." 328 00:14:36,476 --> 00:14:39,746 Thank you for having me. I'm excited to be here. 329 00:14:39,846 --> 00:14:41,848 Okay. Uh... 330 00:14:41,948 --> 00:14:44,084 My lips are so long, they're knocking around 331 00:14:44,184 --> 00:14:46,820 between my knees like those balls on your therapist's desk, 332 00:14:46,920 --> 00:14:49,122 like... 333 00:14:49,222 --> 00:14:52,292 If you're not laughing, you hate women. 334 00:14:52,392 --> 00:14:54,828 I hear it's very good and that Zach Galifianakis 335 00:14:54,928 --> 00:14:56,730 has one sweet ass. 336 00:14:58,565 --> 00:15:01,334 This is an impression of Dora the Explorer. 337 00:15:01,434 --> 00:15:02,969 Cool. Bold wig. 338 00:15:03,970 --> 00:15:05,672 Hola, amigos! 339 00:15:05,772 --> 00:15:08,541 Today we are going to talk about 340 00:15:08,641 --> 00:15:10,443 happiness! 341 00:15:10,543 --> 00:15:15,448 Tell me, do the color of my shorts make you happy? 342 00:15:15,548 --> 00:15:17,017 Wow. 343 00:15:17,117 --> 00:15:20,687 Yeah. Just the dead silence of that audition. 344 00:15:20,787 --> 00:15:22,689 Me too! 345 00:15:22,789 --> 00:15:24,290 What is this? 346 00:15:24,391 --> 00:15:25,992 I just moved outta my mom's house, 347 00:15:26,092 --> 00:15:28,428 so it's like over for me. 348 00:15:28,528 --> 00:15:31,197 -I'm not gonna make it. -Look how high my shoulders are. 349 00:15:31,297 --> 00:15:34,834 'Cause, uh, I'm six-three and 145 pounds, 350 00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:37,971 and, uh, I have a problem with wind. 351 00:15:38,071 --> 00:15:40,306 I also don't know what race I am, 352 00:15:40,407 --> 00:15:42,942 so I don't know how I'm-- like I'm more miscellaneous 353 00:15:43,043 --> 00:15:44,577 in the face, you know? 354 00:15:44,678 --> 00:15:47,714 Now I just go along with it whenever people are like, 355 00:15:47,814 --> 00:15:49,182 "Hey, man, are you Puerto Rican?" 356 00:15:49,282 --> 00:15:53,720 I'm like, "Yes. Yes, I'm a six-foot-three Puerto Rican." 357 00:15:53,820 --> 00:15:55,755 How the fuck did I get the show? 358 00:15:55,855 --> 00:15:58,291 I just, uh, miss my mom. 359 00:15:58,391 --> 00:16:03,463 It's wild to see the hope in-in one's eye. 360 00:16:03,563 --> 00:16:07,634 I didn't know whether to do impressions or stand-up. 361 00:16:07,734 --> 00:16:10,437 I called my buddy, and I was like, "Should I do impressions?" 362 00:16:10,537 --> 00:16:12,339 He's like, "Can you?" I was like, "No." 363 00:16:12,439 --> 00:16:15,175 And he's like, "Well, you should do stand-up." 364 00:16:15,275 --> 00:16:18,511 Maybe two times in six minutes, someone just went, "Ha!" 365 00:16:18,611 --> 00:16:22,449 I was like, "That was terrible. There's no way I'm getting it." 366 00:16:24,117 --> 00:16:26,252 There's nobody laughing. 367 00:16:26,353 --> 00:16:30,123 I think we should be better at it, frankly, at laughing. 368 00:16:30,223 --> 00:16:33,293 I'm too genuine and honest of a person to fake a laugh. 369 00:16:33,393 --> 00:16:35,495 You can't manipulate the process. 370 00:16:35,595 --> 00:16:38,131 If something doesn't make me laugh in the first minute, 371 00:16:38,231 --> 00:16:39,332 it's not gonna get better. 372 00:16:39,432 --> 00:16:41,468 You still can get laughs, 373 00:16:41,568 --> 00:16:44,738 but I think they're all told, "Don't worry that you don't. 374 00:16:44,838 --> 00:16:45,905 Don't lose your cool." 375 00:16:46,006 --> 00:16:47,974 I brought in my props, 376 00:16:48,074 --> 00:16:50,777 and I remember starting off a character, 377 00:16:50,877 --> 00:16:52,612 and the audience was not laughing. 378 00:16:52,712 --> 00:16:56,349 It was like crickets, and I was like, "Oh God, I'm tanking!" 379 00:16:56,449 --> 00:17:00,720 And so I turned around to put on the next character's glasses, 380 00:17:00,820 --> 00:17:03,490 and I remember turning around and giving myself a pep talk 381 00:17:03,590 --> 00:17:07,293 like, "It's okay, Molly. Just take a deep breath. 382 00:17:07,394 --> 00:17:10,263 Put on the glasses and just try to be a really good actress. 383 00:17:10,363 --> 00:17:13,099 Don't worry about laughs. Just commit as an actress." 384 00:17:13,199 --> 00:17:15,769 And I came back up, had the glasses on, 385 00:17:15,869 --> 00:17:17,904 and then it went very well. 386 00:17:18,004 --> 00:17:19,939 You had to be willing to fail and flop. 387 00:17:20,040 --> 00:17:21,975 It's a very important part of the process. 388 00:17:22,075 --> 00:17:25,145 I sort of at the time was doing this awkward 389 00:17:25,245 --> 00:17:28,081 interview character and kind of a version of myself 390 00:17:28,181 --> 00:17:30,850 that isn't incredibly articulate. 391 00:17:30,950 --> 00:17:32,686 Oh, thank you so much. 392 00:17:32,786 --> 00:17:35,388 You guys are being so nice. Thank you, thank you. 393 00:17:35,488 --> 00:17:37,257 -And-- -I think it's just like you. 394 00:17:37,357 --> 00:17:40,126 I think people think that. I believe you, 395 00:17:40,226 --> 00:17:42,028 -but I promise I'm-- -I think the interview 396 00:17:42,128 --> 00:17:44,497 character's just like you. 397 00:17:45,165 --> 00:17:47,233 I don't wanna do this anymore. 398 00:17:47,334 --> 00:17:50,270 I was like, I wanna open my audition 399 00:17:50,370 --> 00:17:53,373 sort of as if I'm hosting Saturday Night Live. 400 00:17:53,473 --> 00:17:55,308 We got a great show for you tonight. 401 00:17:55,408 --> 00:17:58,478 Uh, of course, you're coming here live 402 00:17:58,812 --> 00:18:00,814 for SNL's... 403 00:18:00,914 --> 00:18:03,216 from-from Rocky Centers. 404 00:18:03,316 --> 00:18:06,052 I did something like, um, 405 00:18:06,152 --> 00:18:08,455 "Wow, I can't believe I'm here 406 00:18:08,555 --> 00:18:12,525 at 30 Rockers in front of the Lonnie Mickers!" 407 00:18:12,625 --> 00:18:15,261 Of course, the main man of the hour is here, 408 00:18:15,362 --> 00:18:18,431 producer, creator, Mr. Lonnie... 409 00:18:20,033 --> 00:18:21,568 Mickers... 410 00:18:22,168 --> 00:18:23,870 Oh, I'll just-- 411 00:18:23,970 --> 00:18:26,439 And it got no response. 412 00:18:26,539 --> 00:18:30,510 It was the very first thing I did, and I was like, "Oh no." 413 00:18:30,610 --> 00:18:32,579 I'm just imagining Lorne in the audition, 414 00:18:32,679 --> 00:18:34,881 -"Lonnie Mickers?" -"That's not my name." 415 00:18:34,981 --> 00:18:37,584 "That's not my name. The fuck?" 416 00:18:37,684 --> 00:18:40,754 When someone comes out and doesn't get a laugh, 417 00:18:40,854 --> 00:18:44,057 it's just the worst feeling, 'cause you're like, 418 00:18:44,157 --> 00:18:45,492 "I picked these people." 419 00:18:46,259 --> 00:18:48,194 There was a guy named Henry Zebrowski. 420 00:18:48,294 --> 00:18:50,363 He did his audition. Three minutes in, 421 00:18:50,463 --> 00:18:53,233 he came out from the wall, and he was completely naked. 422 00:18:53,333 --> 00:18:56,169 Oh God! Oh my God, oh my God! 423 00:18:56,269 --> 00:18:58,104 Sorry I'm late for the meeting. 424 00:18:58,204 --> 00:18:59,873 Okay? I'm sorry! 425 00:19:00,240 --> 00:19:02,375 It was such a shock and also 426 00:19:02,475 --> 00:19:04,511 I'm not even sure-- I have no idea what he did at that point. 427 00:19:04,611 --> 00:19:06,780 Like, who remembers what he did, the naked guy? 428 00:19:06,880 --> 00:19:10,984 But he was the naked guy, and he didn't get hired. 429 00:19:11,084 --> 00:19:12,519 But not because he got naked. 430 00:19:12,952 --> 00:19:14,354 Thank you. 431 00:19:14,454 --> 00:19:16,523 I've been to New York lots of times. 432 00:19:16,623 --> 00:19:19,292 I know how to communicate with the street people. 433 00:19:21,861 --> 00:19:23,396 Hey, buddy! 434 00:19:24,264 --> 00:19:27,867 Come here for a second. 435 00:19:27,967 --> 00:19:29,502 Come on over here. 436 00:19:30,704 --> 00:19:32,138 Tell me... 437 00:19:32,238 --> 00:19:34,307 do you find it... 438 00:19:34,407 --> 00:19:37,310 unusually windy today? 439 00:19:37,410 --> 00:19:40,380 There's a lot of people that I brought in and I'm like, 440 00:19:40,480 --> 00:19:42,849 "I can't believe we're not hiring that person. Okay." 441 00:19:42,949 --> 00:19:44,751 Peter, 442 00:19:44,851 --> 00:19:46,720 who do we know? 443 00:19:46,820 --> 00:19:48,621 Jennifer Coolidge was 444 00:19:48,722 --> 00:19:50,123 so funny. 445 00:19:50,223 --> 00:19:52,926 I couldn't get anybody to get it. 446 00:19:53,026 --> 00:19:56,096 Oh. Well. Never mind. 447 00:19:56,196 --> 00:19:57,397 I always said, "You know what? 448 00:19:57,497 --> 00:19:59,399 Anyone that doesn't end up on the show 449 00:19:59,499 --> 00:20:01,501 ends up doing better. Don't worry about it." 450 00:20:01,601 --> 00:20:04,938 Oh, they're looking for a blonde. 451 00:20:05,038 --> 00:20:07,374 Like, um... a dark blonde? 452 00:20:07,474 --> 00:20:09,542 You might recognize me from some of my work. 453 00:20:09,642 --> 00:20:11,911 I was in Michael Jackson's video "Beat It." 454 00:20:12,012 --> 00:20:14,881 I was in the eighth row with the striped shirt and leg warmers. 455 00:20:14,981 --> 00:20:17,517 The dance I was doing, all the kids were doing at the time. 456 00:20:17,617 --> 00:20:19,686 It was very simple. You threw your hands... 457 00:20:19,786 --> 00:20:22,822 Ow, it hurts. And you pull. Of course I could do it better 458 00:20:22,922 --> 00:20:25,325 if my spine wasn't fused. 459 00:20:25,425 --> 00:20:27,927 I can think of a couple, but I don't wanna say. 460 00:20:30,663 --> 00:20:32,766 But there are definitely a couple people 461 00:20:32,866 --> 00:20:36,369 who, you know, are incredibly successful both in film and TV 462 00:20:36,469 --> 00:20:39,305 who came in and did an audition and didn't get picked. 463 00:20:39,406 --> 00:20:41,541 Lotta things going on in New York today. 464 00:20:41,641 --> 00:20:44,144 Lotta things going on in New York, 465 00:20:44,244 --> 00:20:46,880 and there's two camps, Black people 466 00:20:46,980 --> 00:20:48,648 and vampires. 467 00:20:48,748 --> 00:20:51,751 Darius was the guy who was way too thug to be a barista. 468 00:20:51,851 --> 00:20:54,020 I'm sure you've seen this guy just like... 469 00:20:54,521 --> 00:20:56,222 "Wait. That's not what you said, though. 470 00:20:56,322 --> 00:20:58,458 That's not what you said. Naw, naw, naw. 471 00:20:58,558 --> 00:21:01,127 Ha ha. That's what you said? You said that. 472 00:21:01,227 --> 00:21:02,729 You said, 'Caramel mint mocha latte.' 473 00:21:02,829 --> 00:21:05,165 You said, 'Caramel mint mocha latte.' 474 00:21:05,265 --> 00:21:07,701 Naw, I ain't think so. Aw, naw..." 475 00:21:08,234 --> 00:21:10,003 I was hoping I would never see this. 476 00:21:10,103 --> 00:21:13,473 And this last one is a waiter who is nauseated by food. 477 00:21:13,573 --> 00:21:17,177 Our soup today is a creamy fish chowder 478 00:21:17,277 --> 00:21:20,347 with chunks of potato, corn... 479 00:21:22,282 --> 00:21:23,950 ...and scallops. 480 00:21:24,050 --> 00:21:25,985 7.95. 481 00:21:26,086 --> 00:21:29,322 We have a-- ugh. 482 00:21:29,422 --> 00:21:31,257 We have a milk-fed veal with a... 483 00:21:31,358 --> 00:21:32,959 ugh... mint jelly. 484 00:21:33,059 --> 00:21:36,996 That comes with asparagus tips and an olive caper sauce. 485 00:21:37,097 --> 00:21:39,299 17.95. 486 00:21:39,399 --> 00:21:41,301 Why didn't you hire me? 487 00:21:41,401 --> 00:21:42,802 That was pretty good! 488 00:21:42,902 --> 00:21:46,639 I watched that and I went, "Aww! Good for you, buddy. 489 00:21:46,740 --> 00:21:49,376 It's gonna get better. Like, eventually, 490 00:21:49,476 --> 00:21:51,511 someone will like that enough to hire you." 491 00:21:51,611 --> 00:21:54,547 There's more, but I don't wanna overstay my welcome. 492 00:21:55,815 --> 00:21:57,250 Okay. 493 00:21:57,350 --> 00:21:58,718 I feel perfectly fine with that effort, 494 00:21:58,818 --> 00:22:02,188 and I probably felt okay then until I didn't get it. 495 00:22:02,288 --> 00:22:04,190 For whatever reason, it didn't happen. 496 00:22:04,290 --> 00:22:06,359 Obviously, he's doing great. 497 00:22:06,459 --> 00:22:10,030 It doesn't matter! I wasn't on SNL. 498 00:22:10,130 --> 00:22:12,132 This is nothing! 499 00:22:13,066 --> 00:22:15,468 I wish there was a formula. Like if you get 500 00:22:15,568 --> 00:22:18,038 three of the five characters, we're hiring them. 501 00:22:18,138 --> 00:22:21,675 It was like sometimes we would, and sometimes we wouldn't. 502 00:22:21,775 --> 00:22:26,379 Because it's only five minutes, every second is so valuable 503 00:22:26,479 --> 00:22:29,315 that you don't wanna waste any time. 504 00:22:29,416 --> 00:22:30,984 I always say less is more, 505 00:22:31,084 --> 00:22:35,288 but I don't recall anyone going on for ten minutes, 506 00:22:35,388 --> 00:22:37,357 and that that worked. 507 00:22:37,457 --> 00:22:38,992 My name is Kenan Thompson. How y'all doing? 508 00:22:39,092 --> 00:22:41,227 Here to audition one more time for Saturday Night Live. 509 00:22:41,327 --> 00:22:45,331 Feeling excited about it. I'll get into my thing. 510 00:22:45,432 --> 00:22:48,134 Wow. The crazy thing is I remember that sniff. 511 00:22:48,234 --> 00:22:51,004 Hello. This is Jesse. 512 00:22:51,104 --> 00:22:53,840 Jesse, it's Al Sharpton. 513 00:22:53,940 --> 00:22:57,444 Apparently, I have landed in the rocks of Afghanistan... 514 00:22:57,811 --> 00:23:00,580 Jesse, it's Arnold Schwarzenegger. 515 00:23:00,680 --> 00:23:02,849 I need your help with the Black vote. 516 00:23:02,949 --> 00:23:06,786 Won't the real Schwarzenegger please stand up? Stand up! 517 00:23:06,886 --> 00:23:08,688 So I'm in the Hamptons last night. 518 00:23:08,788 --> 00:23:10,790 I'm having dinner at Crustaceans. 519 00:23:10,890 --> 00:23:12,726 I don't know if Crustaceans is really a restaurant 520 00:23:12,826 --> 00:23:14,494 in the Hamptons, but it doesn't matter. 521 00:23:14,594 --> 00:23:16,463 Little Richard, what about Star Jones? 522 00:23:16,563 --> 00:23:17,897 You hope she'll get a healthy recovery? 523 00:23:17,997 --> 00:23:20,467 -Wrap it up. -I don't care about Star Jones. 524 00:23:20,567 --> 00:23:22,635 I'm prettier than Star Jones. * Ooh * 525 00:23:22,736 --> 00:23:24,738 I don't know any Italian words to mix in this sketch, 526 00:23:24,838 --> 00:23:26,673 but that's all right. I got the voice down. 527 00:23:26,773 --> 00:23:29,075 I appreciate it, you guys. Take it easy. 528 00:23:29,175 --> 00:23:30,643 Whew. 529 00:23:31,644 --> 00:23:33,546 That was a lot. 530 00:23:33,646 --> 00:23:36,383 And just very green as far as, like, 531 00:23:36,483 --> 00:23:38,818 the formulation of performing comedy, 532 00:23:38,918 --> 00:23:41,154 'cause I never grew up doing stand-up. I'm an actor. 533 00:23:41,254 --> 00:23:45,625 Like watching my audition, it's like 98 percent bullshit, 534 00:23:45,725 --> 00:23:49,195 but there's 2 percent that you can maybe carve something out. 535 00:23:49,295 --> 00:23:50,930 There's potential, if you will. 536 00:23:51,031 --> 00:23:53,700 There's still something charming in it, you know? 537 00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:57,003 Because, like... I do go on for so long. 538 00:23:57,103 --> 00:24:00,407 I do remember that one moment, that one little thing, 539 00:24:00,507 --> 00:24:01,975 which is, he was doing Cosby. 540 00:24:02,075 --> 00:24:05,578 America is obsessed with sex in the booty, 541 00:24:05,679 --> 00:24:08,314 even my wife... Camille! 542 00:24:08,415 --> 00:24:12,285 And the way he said Camille, I'm just like, "Oh." I'll never forget it. 543 00:24:12,385 --> 00:24:13,753 It just felt like he belonged here. 544 00:24:13,853 --> 00:24:15,889 You wanna do the electric slide with me, Bill? 545 00:24:15,989 --> 00:24:17,290 Come on. Uh-uh. 546 00:24:19,626 --> 00:24:21,695 Now, you see what you made me do 547 00:24:21,795 --> 00:24:24,831 in front of my wife... Camille? 548 00:24:28,501 --> 00:24:30,403 My sketch group made a sketch 549 00:24:30,503 --> 00:24:32,038 that was me playing Vinny Vedecci, 550 00:24:32,138 --> 00:24:34,774 the Italian talk show host, doing impressions. 551 00:24:34,874 --> 00:24:36,943 The final, final impressione. 552 00:24:37,043 --> 00:24:39,612 Final impressione for you. 553 00:24:39,713 --> 00:24:41,781 Is... * Ba da di di di di dah * 554 00:24:41,881 --> 00:24:44,617 - Mr. Al Pacino-- - Do the one where he's-- 555 00:24:44,718 --> 00:24:46,286 Shut your fucking face. 556 00:24:46,386 --> 00:24:50,023 We made a sketch that was kind of an SNL audition in the show. 557 00:24:50,123 --> 00:24:53,860 So I go up, and I remember I did the Vinny Vedecci voice, 558 00:24:53,960 --> 00:24:57,063 and I feel like Tina Fey or someone laughed. 559 00:24:57,163 --> 00:25:00,133 And I kinda relaxed, and I just did my audition. 560 00:25:00,233 --> 00:25:04,637 Uh, now I'm going to do some impressione for you, huh? 561 00:25:04,738 --> 00:25:06,873 All right. First impressione 562 00:25:06,973 --> 00:25:08,508 is Mr... 563 00:25:08,608 --> 00:25:10,443 * Bi di di di dah * 564 00:25:10,543 --> 00:25:12,712 Al Pacino. Al Pacino. 565 00:25:12,812 --> 00:25:15,615 This is Al Pacino having a meeting 566 00:25:15,715 --> 00:25:18,985 with his new housekeepers. 567 00:25:25,125 --> 00:25:27,360 If I walk into this kitchen... 568 00:25:29,529 --> 00:25:32,098 ...and I see a cantaloupe 569 00:25:32,198 --> 00:25:33,833 on that table, 570 00:25:34,634 --> 00:25:37,971 I will lose my mind. 571 00:25:39,305 --> 00:25:40,507 That's a perfect version, 572 00:25:40,607 --> 00:25:41,708 'cause you can see 573 00:25:41,808 --> 00:25:43,677 Al Pacino impressions, right? 574 00:25:43,777 --> 00:25:45,812 Obviously, he has a good Al Pacino, 575 00:25:45,912 --> 00:25:47,781 but it's not just doing a great impression. 576 00:25:47,881 --> 00:25:50,250 It's making it like-- talking about cantaloupe. 577 00:25:50,350 --> 00:25:54,621 You know, it's... That's what makes the brilliant people 578 00:25:54,721 --> 00:25:56,690 even more brilliant, right, is that they can 579 00:25:56,790 --> 00:25:58,692 make something really fun and different. 580 00:25:58,792 --> 00:26:00,193 What? 581 00:26:01,261 --> 00:26:03,029 Jujyfruits? 582 00:26:03,563 --> 00:26:05,265 Always. 583 00:26:06,066 --> 00:26:09,969 Don the Butler loves his Jujyfruits. 584 00:26:10,070 --> 00:26:11,671 You know what's amazing too, 585 00:26:11,771 --> 00:26:14,507 is some people would have had the Jujyfruits. 586 00:26:14,607 --> 00:26:16,376 Like, he didn't need the Jujyfruits. 587 00:26:16,476 --> 00:26:18,812 I came in the elevator at 30 Rock, 588 00:26:18,912 --> 00:26:21,448 and there was another guy there that had a ton of props. 589 00:26:21,548 --> 00:26:25,752 I had this big bag of props and wigs, 'cause I was like, "I'm gonna show them 590 00:26:25,852 --> 00:26:29,389 all these characters with these incredible props I bought at the Halloween Store." 591 00:26:29,489 --> 00:26:32,625 I was looking at him going, "Man, this guy brought props. 592 00:26:32,726 --> 00:26:34,561 I didn't bring props." 593 00:26:34,661 --> 00:26:36,796 And I remember looking at Bill thinking, 594 00:26:36,896 --> 00:26:39,699 "Oh God, he doesn't have anything with him. 595 00:26:39,799 --> 00:26:43,203 He doesn't need any literal props to prop him up." 596 00:26:43,303 --> 00:26:45,438 -Shit. -I'm screwed. 597 00:26:45,538 --> 00:26:48,108 Hey, I'm Billy Bob Thornton, 598 00:26:48,208 --> 00:26:51,478 and welcome to Billy Bob Thornton's show about Kangols. 599 00:26:51,578 --> 00:26:53,880 I miss that body. 600 00:26:55,682 --> 00:26:57,650 Kangols are, of course, the brand of hat 601 00:26:57,751 --> 00:27:00,186 that I adore so much, and this is the only show 602 00:27:00,286 --> 00:27:03,356 that explores all facets of the Kangol lifestyle. 603 00:27:03,456 --> 00:27:05,191 Had to bring the Kangol 604 00:27:05,291 --> 00:27:09,229 'cause the whole bit was based on Kangols. 605 00:27:09,329 --> 00:27:12,565 That was the first and last time I ever bought a Kangol. 606 00:27:12,665 --> 00:27:15,368 This is Jimmy Fallon at a funeral. 607 00:27:15,468 --> 00:27:17,470 I did do Fallon. 608 00:27:17,570 --> 00:27:19,139 I knew he had done Sandler. 609 00:27:19,239 --> 00:27:22,242 Why don't you go to the store with your mother? 610 00:27:22,342 --> 00:27:26,112 So it was kind of a thing. Higgins was like, "You should do Jimmy." 611 00:27:26,212 --> 00:27:27,447 So I-I did. 612 00:27:27,547 --> 00:27:30,216 Hey, what's going on, my man? Man, this funeral's so sad. 613 00:27:30,316 --> 00:27:33,253 It's so sad! By the way, I got you a gift basket for the occasion. 614 00:27:33,353 --> 00:27:36,189 There's like four kinds of meat. It's fantastic! All right! 615 00:27:36,289 --> 00:27:40,393 Ras Trent. Oh my God, that wig is atrosh. 616 00:27:40,493 --> 00:27:41,828 Looks like Milli Vanilli. 617 00:27:41,928 --> 00:27:44,164 * The White guy with dreads * 618 00:27:44,264 --> 00:27:45,765 Excuse I! 619 00:27:46,232 --> 00:27:48,034 Blessings. Blessings, everyone, 620 00:27:48,134 --> 00:27:51,004 and welcome to this super irie board meeting. 621 00:27:51,104 --> 00:27:53,606 Ras Trent was based on an actual person 622 00:27:53,707 --> 00:27:54,974 me and my friends met. 623 00:27:55,075 --> 00:27:57,143 I grew up in Berkeley, California, 624 00:27:57,243 --> 00:27:59,112 and we would go to lots of reggae shows, 625 00:27:59,212 --> 00:28:01,981 and we went to this reggae show, and were all sitting 626 00:28:02,082 --> 00:28:04,351 on the steps of the lobby theater, 627 00:28:04,451 --> 00:28:08,321 and this really like buttoned-up White dude walked up. 628 00:28:08,421 --> 00:28:12,292 We were blocking his way, and he went, "Excuse I." 629 00:28:12,392 --> 00:28:14,194 And we all went, "What?" 630 00:28:14,294 --> 00:28:16,863 And we let him pass then all just died laughing 631 00:28:16,963 --> 00:28:19,165 for like an hour, then for the next ten years, 632 00:28:19,265 --> 00:28:21,201 we would say that to each other all the time. 633 00:28:21,301 --> 00:28:25,038 So like most ideas that we had, we shoehorned it into a song. 634 00:28:25,138 --> 00:28:28,208 * Excuse I, oh hot stepper... * 635 00:28:28,308 --> 00:28:31,778 * The cartridge is out of ink Repatriation! * 636 00:28:31,878 --> 00:28:34,848 In his audition, he did this thing I've never talked to him about, 637 00:28:34,948 --> 00:28:36,216 but I think about it a lot. 638 00:28:36,316 --> 00:28:38,585 It was something about the way he held his hands 639 00:28:38,685 --> 00:28:40,387 when he said he was a triple threat. 640 00:28:40,487 --> 00:28:44,758 Oh, and PS, I totally wrote that jingle and sang it, so... triple threat. 641 00:28:44,858 --> 00:28:47,594 And it just like, "Oh yeah. That." 642 00:28:48,228 --> 00:28:51,564 On all those people, I'll never forget those moments. 643 00:28:52,298 --> 00:28:55,502 Yeah, I had a unique experience, I think, there, 644 00:28:55,602 --> 00:28:57,137 from an audition point of view. 645 00:28:57,237 --> 00:29:00,173 This is what I was told, or this is a story I'm making up. 646 00:29:00,273 --> 00:29:04,177 I don't know. But they had seen me do a bunch of characters... 647 00:29:04,277 --> 00:29:07,580 - You know what? It's judgment day, bitch. -What? 648 00:29:07,681 --> 00:29:08,815 Come on! 649 00:29:08,915 --> 00:29:11,351 -Stacy, don't do this! -Whoa! 650 00:29:11,985 --> 00:29:15,989 And so I was told they wanted me to kind of be myself 651 00:29:16,089 --> 00:29:18,858 so they could kind of see what that was like. 652 00:29:18,958 --> 00:29:21,995 So my audition, if I am to remember correctly, 653 00:29:22,095 --> 00:29:24,597 was me doing kind of like an Update piece. 654 00:29:25,165 --> 00:29:29,402 But I didn't do impressions and characters. 655 00:29:30,303 --> 00:29:33,273 How did I swing that? Did I ask for that? 656 00:29:33,373 --> 00:29:35,742 Did someone ask that of me? I don't know. 657 00:29:36,276 --> 00:29:39,713 I don't even wanna watch it 'cause I don't remember it. 658 00:29:39,813 --> 00:29:42,115 I don't think I do. Here's why. 659 00:29:42,215 --> 00:29:44,718 I have like a nice feeling about it, 660 00:29:44,818 --> 00:29:46,419 and I don't think 661 00:29:46,519 --> 00:29:51,057 I'm going to have that feeling after I watch it. 662 00:29:51,157 --> 00:29:53,426 What if I watched one minute of it? 663 00:29:54,494 --> 00:29:56,996 Hi. Um, I'm not su-- 664 00:29:57,097 --> 00:29:59,899 I'm Amy Poehler, and I'm here to talk about something 665 00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:02,002 -I know quite a bit about... -Oof! I'm so nervous. 666 00:30:02,102 --> 00:30:04,904 -...sports. -Yeah. I did a bit about sports. 667 00:30:05,005 --> 00:30:07,507 I followed the series pretty seriously this year... 668 00:30:07,607 --> 00:30:09,309 What is the joke? 669 00:30:09,409 --> 00:30:11,978 I've already been talking for 30 seconds, 670 00:30:12,078 --> 00:30:13,813 and there's no joke, and I'm dying. 671 00:30:13,913 --> 00:30:15,949 I've come to the conclusion 672 00:30:16,049 --> 00:30:18,718 that Shaquille O'Neal is a big, fat, rude idiot. 673 00:30:18,818 --> 00:30:20,787 -Oh, okay. -And he's too huge. 674 00:30:20,887 --> 00:30:23,323 I'm just doing-- I'm doing an Update piece 675 00:30:23,423 --> 00:30:28,328 about Shaquille O'Neal being too big for basketball. 676 00:30:28,895 --> 00:30:31,331 Okay. That's enough. 677 00:30:33,600 --> 00:30:36,002 Oh boy. Oh boy. 678 00:30:36,102 --> 00:30:38,638 Do you ever make a video for someone for their birthday 679 00:30:38,738 --> 00:30:40,040 and you send the wrong one? 680 00:30:40,140 --> 00:30:41,841 That's what that audition feels like, 681 00:30:41,941 --> 00:30:44,077 like a draft of an audition, 682 00:30:44,177 --> 00:30:47,080 like what I would tape to get ready for an audition. 683 00:30:47,180 --> 00:30:49,883 And I don't know who let him in, but they should be fired. 684 00:30:49,983 --> 00:30:52,952 That's rude. 685 00:30:53,053 --> 00:30:55,055 We knew we were hiring her before she did this. 686 00:30:55,155 --> 00:30:57,157 This was more like a formality. 687 00:30:57,257 --> 00:30:59,092 I mean, when it comes down to it, 688 00:30:59,192 --> 00:31:01,628 I think Tina got me the job. 689 00:31:01,728 --> 00:31:04,597 I scratched and clawed 690 00:31:04,698 --> 00:31:07,200 through mud and barbed wire, 691 00:31:07,300 --> 00:31:10,637 and you just glided in on a dog sled. 692 00:31:13,373 --> 00:31:15,308 Lorne always said, "Let's get people 693 00:31:15,408 --> 00:31:17,811 through recommendations of cast members and writers." 694 00:31:17,911 --> 00:31:19,245 Andy Samberg got on the show 695 00:31:19,346 --> 00:31:21,214 because Jimmy Fallon recommended him. 696 00:31:21,314 --> 00:31:23,383 George Wendt called me about Jason Sudeikis. 697 00:31:23,483 --> 00:31:26,820 Gwyneth Paltrow called me about Maya Rudolph. 698 00:31:26,920 --> 00:31:31,291 Everyone knows it's my birthday! 699 00:31:31,391 --> 00:31:33,827 I feel like every story's pretty different. 700 00:31:33,927 --> 00:31:35,729 There were people who went on that stage 701 00:31:35,829 --> 00:31:38,698 and already had the job, and then others that came in the side. 702 00:31:38,798 --> 00:31:42,002 Sometimes we would do a studio test towards the end of a year 703 00:31:42,102 --> 00:31:44,571 or middle year if we were really missing somebody. 704 00:31:44,671 --> 00:31:47,440 Like Kate McKinnon, she was added at the end of a season. 705 00:31:47,540 --> 00:31:50,276 Hello. I'm Penelope Cruz. 706 00:31:50,377 --> 00:31:54,080 I'm always searching for the most perfect moisturizer. 707 00:31:54,180 --> 00:31:57,083 I chose L'Oreal Derma Genesis 708 00:31:57,183 --> 00:32:00,186 with. 709 00:32:00,286 --> 00:32:04,257 Its natural emollient... ...top skin layer, 710 00:32:04,357 --> 00:32:07,961 leaving skin feeling tighter with a dewy glow. 711 00:32:08,061 --> 00:32:11,297 L'Oreal... because you're worth it. 712 00:32:11,398 --> 00:32:14,234 Over there's your antique four-poster canopy bed. 713 00:32:14,334 --> 00:32:16,002 And this-- Okay, this is actually 714 00:32:16,102 --> 00:32:17,971 the centerpiece of the room right here. 715 00:32:18,071 --> 00:32:21,007 This is a hand-woven Amish quilt. 716 00:32:21,107 --> 00:32:23,710 Just try not to cum on it. 717 00:32:25,078 --> 00:32:28,048 Sometimes Lorne would be like, "We're hiring them," 718 00:32:28,148 --> 00:32:30,216 and you'd be like... It's nerve-racking, right? 719 00:32:30,316 --> 00:32:32,852 'Cause you're like, it's a big choice 720 00:32:32,952 --> 00:32:34,421 and you don't ever wanna be wrong. 721 00:32:34,521 --> 00:32:36,790 Sometimes he'd be like, "Nope. Coming back." 722 00:32:36,890 --> 00:32:39,092 Like, Andy auditioned twice. 723 00:32:39,192 --> 00:32:42,195 Taran Killam over the course of two years. 724 00:32:42,295 --> 00:32:44,364 Sometimes it is the question of 725 00:32:44,464 --> 00:32:47,000 is that five minutes all that they have 726 00:32:47,100 --> 00:32:48,401 or is there more there? 727 00:32:48,501 --> 00:32:51,037 Because sometimes you get a sense from somebody-- 728 00:32:51,137 --> 00:32:52,772 there's much more behind that five minutes. 729 00:32:52,872 --> 00:32:57,143 Other times it's less clear, and you wanna see what else. 730 00:32:57,243 --> 00:33:00,780 Oh God, I'm gonna hate this. 731 00:33:01,381 --> 00:33:04,150 -No! Aah! -Hi, this is an impression of... 732 00:33:04,250 --> 00:33:06,553 -No! -...an esteemed member... 733 00:33:06,653 --> 00:33:07,854 No! 734 00:33:07,954 --> 00:33:09,889 No, no, no. 735 00:33:09,989 --> 00:33:13,126 -...of the glitterati. -Oh God. No! 736 00:33:13,226 --> 00:33:15,261 Thirty seconds. How much time do we have? 737 00:33:15,362 --> 00:33:17,230 -Ding dong, bookworms. -No, no, no! 738 00:33:17,330 --> 00:33:19,332 Its famously acerbic former book critic 739 00:33:19,432 --> 00:33:22,702 for The New York Times, Michiko Kakutani. 740 00:33:22,802 --> 00:33:25,338 Okay, all right. That's enough. 741 00:33:25,438 --> 00:33:27,407 Everyone says this, but your first audition, 742 00:33:27,507 --> 00:33:30,043 it's like when a musician comes out with their debut album. 743 00:33:30,143 --> 00:33:31,978 Their whole life had led up to that. 744 00:33:32,078 --> 00:33:35,281 Then the sophomore album is kinda the thing that gets a little tricky, 745 00:33:35,382 --> 00:33:37,784 because now you're supposed to deliver on something 746 00:33:37,884 --> 00:33:41,154 that has to be the sediment on top of what's been established. 747 00:33:41,254 --> 00:33:43,056 -We auditioned twice. -The second night... 748 00:33:43,156 --> 00:33:44,257 -Second time. -Second callback. 749 00:33:44,357 --> 00:33:46,459 Second audition, they said, 750 00:33:46,559 --> 00:33:49,863 "We wanna see her again, but, like, full new audition." 751 00:33:49,963 --> 00:33:51,831 And I was like, "Excuse me?" 752 00:33:51,931 --> 00:33:55,135 I did the 12 things I had. 753 00:33:55,235 --> 00:33:57,270 They were like, "You're getting a second audition!" 754 00:33:57,370 --> 00:33:59,305 I was like, "Cool, see you next year." 755 00:33:59,406 --> 00:34:01,441 They were like, "No, we're doing it in two weeks." 756 00:34:01,541 --> 00:34:03,543 It was, "You're gonna test on a Monday," 757 00:34:03,643 --> 00:34:06,346 and I was in Studio City sitting at some coffee shop, 758 00:34:06,446 --> 00:34:09,949 and it was like Friday at 7 p.m. West Coast time. 759 00:34:10,050 --> 00:34:13,720 They were like, "Come back and audition again on Monday." I was like, "Son of a bitch!" 760 00:34:14,320 --> 00:34:16,189 My first audition was like, 761 00:34:16,289 --> 00:34:18,825 "Here I am as a comedian. I hope I get it." 762 00:34:18,925 --> 00:34:20,627 And my second audition was like, 763 00:34:21,061 --> 00:34:24,030 "This is me, right? I hope. 764 00:34:24,130 --> 00:34:26,332 I don't do impressions. This is Danny DeVito." 765 00:34:26,733 --> 00:34:29,002 Hey. 766 00:34:29,102 --> 00:34:30,603 * Bounce that big watusi booty... * 767 00:34:30,704 --> 00:34:32,105 Oh... no. 768 00:34:32,205 --> 00:34:33,606 * Bounce that big wat, bounce that big wat * 769 00:34:33,707 --> 00:34:35,375 * Bounce that, bounce that, bounce that, bounce that * 770 00:34:35,475 --> 00:34:37,210 * Booty booty booty booty booty booty bounce * 771 00:34:37,310 --> 00:34:38,845 * Booty booty booty booty booty booty bounce * 772 00:34:40,814 --> 00:34:42,649 Holy shit. 773 00:34:43,483 --> 00:34:45,985 They were like, "We need more impressions from you," 774 00:34:46,086 --> 00:34:48,021 and I was like, "I don't think 775 00:34:48,121 --> 00:34:51,157 there are that many prominent Asians." 776 00:34:51,257 --> 00:34:54,194 I think I cycled through all of them. 777 00:34:54,294 --> 00:34:57,597 So then they put me on this deal 778 00:34:57,697 --> 00:34:59,833 that made me come back and screen test again 779 00:34:59,933 --> 00:35:02,268 in August of 2018. 780 00:35:02,369 --> 00:35:04,437 At that point, my fourth screen test, I was like, 781 00:35:04,537 --> 00:35:07,307 "I've done this enough times. I don't think I'm that nervous." 782 00:35:07,407 --> 00:35:10,210 By the fourth time I was just like, "Oh, this is just... 783 00:35:10,310 --> 00:35:11,878 another day at the office." 784 00:35:11,978 --> 00:35:13,980 Hi. Bowen Yang, five-foot-eight, 785 00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:16,483 in for choking victim poster model. 786 00:35:20,854 --> 00:35:22,222 Yeah? 787 00:35:22,322 --> 00:35:24,657 Oh, I was thinking it was like a piece of bread 788 00:35:24,758 --> 00:35:26,693 or like a dry cracker. 789 00:35:26,793 --> 00:35:27,927 I met with Lorne. 790 00:35:28,028 --> 00:35:29,929 His parting shot from that conversation 791 00:35:30,030 --> 00:35:33,900 was him going, "And, Bowen, you've gotten better every time." 792 00:35:34,000 --> 00:35:35,902 And I was like, "I'm in!" 793 00:35:36,002 --> 00:35:37,504 Then he was like, "Just kidding. 794 00:35:37,604 --> 00:35:39,739 You should be a writer instead." I was like, "No problem!" 795 00:35:39,839 --> 00:35:42,776 There were a lot of people that auditioned, 796 00:35:42,876 --> 00:35:44,077 and they wound up being writers. 797 00:35:44,177 --> 00:35:46,246 Donald Trump is not just a rich man. 798 00:35:46,346 --> 00:35:49,149 Donald Trump is like what a hobo imagines 799 00:35:49,249 --> 00:35:50,684 a rich man to be. 800 00:35:50,784 --> 00:35:54,287 When you see writing and you recognize it, 801 00:35:54,387 --> 00:35:56,389 that counts for a lot. 802 00:35:56,489 --> 00:35:59,092 And that's just another example 803 00:35:59,192 --> 00:36:00,694 of, "Oh, I really like when they do this. 804 00:36:00,794 --> 00:36:03,296 But we don't have any more. Let's make them a writer." 805 00:36:03,396 --> 00:36:05,632 It's not a consolation prize for them. 806 00:36:05,732 --> 00:36:09,636 It's a way for us to get to keep them. 807 00:36:13,473 --> 00:36:15,809 I finished my audition. I walked out of 30 Rock. 808 00:36:15,909 --> 00:36:18,645 And this was the second time I'd ever been to New York, 809 00:36:18,745 --> 00:36:21,081 so I was like, you know, Midnight Cowboy. 810 00:36:21,181 --> 00:36:23,216 Like, "Whoa, look at all this!" 811 00:36:23,316 --> 00:36:26,219 So I felt really good, then I flew back home, 812 00:36:26,319 --> 00:36:28,555 and then like a week later, 813 00:36:28,655 --> 00:36:31,391 I was with my manager, and we were having lunch. 814 00:36:31,491 --> 00:36:33,393 I went to the bathroom, I came back, 815 00:36:33,493 --> 00:36:36,396 and she had her phone and was handing me her cell phone, 816 00:36:36,496 --> 00:36:38,531 and I was like, "Hello?" It was Marci Klein, 817 00:36:38,631 --> 00:36:41,101 and she said, "You know you got hired, right?" 818 00:36:41,201 --> 00:36:44,337 "No, I didn't know." She goes, "Oh, congratulations. You got hired. 819 00:36:44,437 --> 00:36:46,339 We need you to fly to New York tomorrow. 820 00:36:46,439 --> 00:36:48,441 You're flying with this guy Andy Samberg. 821 00:36:48,541 --> 00:36:50,410 He's hired, but he doesn't know yet. 822 00:36:50,510 --> 00:36:52,445 We're gonna tell him. Don't tell him." 823 00:36:53,780 --> 00:36:56,783 So the mind games started immediately. 824 00:36:59,152 --> 00:37:02,022 I had heard nothing after that second audition. 825 00:37:02,122 --> 00:37:05,558 I had gone back to LA. I did not get the meeting with Lorne. 826 00:37:05,658 --> 00:37:08,495 I knew other people had, and from everything I'd read, 827 00:37:08,595 --> 00:37:11,064 it was like, the meeting is important. 828 00:37:11,164 --> 00:37:13,266 You need to get that meeting. 829 00:37:13,366 --> 00:37:15,435 I tried to stay hopeful for like four days. 830 00:37:15,535 --> 00:37:17,937 I watched a lot of Great British Bake Off, 831 00:37:18,038 --> 00:37:21,274 and by the ninth day... 832 00:37:21,374 --> 00:37:23,376 I was like, "Okay, it's time to grieve this." 833 00:37:23,476 --> 00:37:26,646 I remember going to the grocery store 834 00:37:26,746 --> 00:37:28,915 just to walk around the cereal aisle 835 00:37:29,015 --> 00:37:32,686 because I knew the boxes would feel nostalgic and comforting. 836 00:37:33,353 --> 00:37:37,657 So I was getting ready to go look at Froot Loops and Lucky Charms, 837 00:37:37,757 --> 00:37:40,727 and I saw a New York number come up on my phone, 838 00:37:40,827 --> 00:37:43,229 and I was like, "Oh my God, New York." 839 00:37:43,329 --> 00:37:45,165 And I answered it, and I was like, "Hello?" 840 00:37:45,265 --> 00:37:48,468 It was like, "Heidi Gardner? I've got Lorne Michaels on the phone." 841 00:37:48,568 --> 00:37:52,272 And I immediately just tried to act like that was normal. 842 00:37:52,372 --> 00:37:54,107 So I was like, "Put him through." 843 00:37:55,842 --> 00:37:59,512 And they were like, "Is this Heidi Gardner?" 844 00:37:59,612 --> 00:38:02,549 I was like, "It is. Put him through." 845 00:38:02,649 --> 00:38:05,318 And then I heard Lorne on the other end, 846 00:38:05,418 --> 00:38:08,788 and he said, "I'm bringing you onto the show." 847 00:38:08,888 --> 00:38:12,759 And then he proceeded to kind of just brief me for three minutes 848 00:38:12,859 --> 00:38:15,729 on what even the next 24 hours would look like, 849 00:38:15,829 --> 00:38:18,098 like that I was moving to New York, 850 00:38:18,198 --> 00:38:22,102 and I would be meeting him on Tuesday, and it was Saturday-- 851 00:38:22,202 --> 00:38:23,570 or it was a Friday. 852 00:38:23,670 --> 00:38:25,705 I really don't even know what he said. 853 00:38:25,805 --> 00:38:28,675 Then I was like, "Oh my God, this man just changed my life, 854 00:38:28,775 --> 00:38:31,411 and I haven't even said a word." So I was like, 855 00:38:31,511 --> 00:38:35,081 "Thank you so much, sir!" I think I screamed it. 856 00:38:35,482 --> 00:38:38,451 When Marci Klein called me after 857 00:38:38,551 --> 00:38:40,487 to say, "I think this is gonna work out," 858 00:38:40,587 --> 00:38:42,255 I remember saving it on my phone. 859 00:38:42,355 --> 00:38:45,025 I saved the call as "Best Call Ever." 860 00:38:45,125 --> 00:38:46,926 And it was. Best call ever. 861 00:38:47,027 --> 00:38:48,928 What a call to get. 862 00:38:50,964 --> 00:38:54,634 I would always give orientation. It's like, "Here's your office." 863 00:38:54,734 --> 00:38:56,903 When you start, you kind of have to make it mundane. 864 00:38:57,003 --> 00:38:59,272 You do have to know where the bathrooms are. 865 00:38:59,372 --> 00:39:00,807 That's the reality. 866 00:39:00,907 --> 00:39:03,443 Nobody has patience for you not knowing the shorthand. 867 00:39:03,543 --> 00:39:05,578 I remember Seth took notes. 868 00:39:05,679 --> 00:39:08,481 Once you are in the cast, 869 00:39:08,581 --> 00:39:10,984 you've got your office, but then you get there, 870 00:39:11,084 --> 00:39:15,422 and you realize you're still sort of auditioning. 871 00:39:15,522 --> 00:39:17,490 You still have to get your stuff on. 872 00:39:17,590 --> 00:39:21,094 I walked in the first day, like, "You wanna have a sleepover in the studio? 873 00:39:21,194 --> 00:39:22,729 No? Does everyone hate me? 874 00:39:22,829 --> 00:39:25,865 What? I'm gonna get fired every day, I think." 875 00:39:25,965 --> 00:39:29,903 Every week feels like you have to prove yourself again. 876 00:39:30,003 --> 00:39:34,974 Sketches get cut. They die on the table. Jokes don't make it. 877 00:39:35,075 --> 00:39:38,712 I made the mistake so many freshmen make where you tell your parents, 878 00:39:38,812 --> 00:39:41,581 "I'm gonna be in something." You just jinx it. 879 00:39:41,681 --> 00:39:44,451 I do this one because people tell me I look like him. 880 00:39:44,551 --> 00:39:46,519 Uh, Ted Allen, the food and wine guy 881 00:39:46,619 --> 00:39:48,788 from Queer Eye for the Straight Guy. 882 00:39:48,888 --> 00:39:50,990 So your new haircut looks fantastic. 883 00:39:51,091 --> 00:39:53,226 After we're done here, we're gonna go to Koko Deluxe, 884 00:39:53,326 --> 00:39:56,629 which is one of the best chocolate stores in the entire city, okay? 885 00:39:56,730 --> 00:39:59,132 Stand there. Let me put a little pomade in your hair. 886 00:39:59,232 --> 00:40:02,802 Just run that through there. Just real quick, go ahead and face forward. 887 00:40:02,902 --> 00:40:05,605 Okay. Just wanna get that. All right, good. 888 00:40:05,705 --> 00:40:07,173 Okay, cool. Let's go. 889 00:40:08,108 --> 00:40:11,778 - There we go. All right. - "There we go." 890 00:40:11,878 --> 00:40:13,947 He's like, "I got shit to do. I gotta get outta here." 891 00:40:14,047 --> 00:40:16,916 I watch that audition, I'm like, "I don't know if I'd hire me." 892 00:40:17,017 --> 00:40:18,885 But I did not get hired into the cast. 893 00:40:18,985 --> 00:40:23,590 I got hired as a writer. I had a really good first month. 894 00:40:23,690 --> 00:40:26,559 First episode with Jack Black, I got a sketch on. 895 00:40:26,659 --> 00:40:29,562 * My child arrived just the other day * 896 00:40:29,662 --> 00:40:32,632 * He came to the world in the usual way * 897 00:40:32,732 --> 00:40:35,335 He was made in the usual way too. On a futon. 898 00:40:35,435 --> 00:40:37,137 Hey, hey! 899 00:40:37,237 --> 00:40:39,773 Second week, I got a sketch on, and that was the Punk'd sketch. 900 00:40:39,873 --> 00:40:42,242 Oh my God, what's wrong with me? 901 00:40:42,342 --> 00:40:44,244 I been sick all morning. 902 00:40:44,344 --> 00:40:46,446 -You're gonna be a mom! -What? 903 00:40:46,546 --> 00:40:47,914 You just got punk'd! 904 00:40:48,014 --> 00:40:50,850 We switched out your birth control pills. 905 00:40:52,018 --> 00:40:54,854 I mean, here I was, worked on television for five days, 906 00:40:54,954 --> 00:40:57,290 and now I'm producing a sketch on SNL. 907 00:40:57,390 --> 00:40:59,659 And then I didn't get shit on 908 00:40:59,759 --> 00:41:03,063 for, like, I don't know, like months. 909 00:41:05,565 --> 00:41:07,667 That's when I started calling home, being like, 910 00:41:07,767 --> 00:41:10,103 "I think I wanna go back to Second City." 911 00:41:10,203 --> 00:41:13,807 It's the show teaching you that it's a marathon, not a sprint. 912 00:41:13,907 --> 00:41:16,876 I feel like those first two years, I was so stressed out. 913 00:41:16,976 --> 00:41:21,348 Could not relax enough to think properly. 914 00:41:21,448 --> 00:41:26,019 It was always just sort of reactive and trying to just survive a little bit. 915 00:41:26,119 --> 00:41:30,390 Then the third and fourth year, started doing more political impressions, 916 00:41:30,490 --> 00:41:33,326 finding footing there, getting more comfortable as a performer. 917 00:41:33,426 --> 00:41:38,398 -Mr. Vice President, my first question is for you. -Thank you. 918 00:41:38,498 --> 00:41:41,434 -The topic is coronavirus. -Damn it. 919 00:41:41,534 --> 00:41:44,938 Once you get comfortable, you start to go, "Oh, that's what it is." 920 00:41:45,038 --> 00:41:47,707 You wanna just be able to have fun no matter what. 921 00:41:47,807 --> 00:41:49,909 Be like, "What's gonna happen?" After all that experience, 922 00:41:50,010 --> 00:41:52,846 your perspective changes a lot, you know. 923 00:41:52,946 --> 00:41:55,882 At first, I had blind confidence, 924 00:41:55,982 --> 00:41:58,318 and then the sketches started getting pulled, 925 00:41:58,418 --> 00:41:59,986 and it started changing. 926 00:42:00,086 --> 00:42:02,989 Then that third year, when Lorne hit me that summer 927 00:42:03,089 --> 00:42:04,824 and was like, "You should try Barack." 928 00:42:04,924 --> 00:42:06,726 And now, a message 929 00:42:06,826 --> 00:42:09,195 from the President of the United States. 930 00:42:12,899 --> 00:42:15,802 The first night I did it, I got off stage, 931 00:42:15,902 --> 00:42:17,937 and Kristen Wiig sent me a text message. 932 00:42:18,038 --> 00:42:19,973 She was like, "That was television. 933 00:42:20,073 --> 00:42:22,242 That's what you're supposed to do. Great job." 934 00:42:22,342 --> 00:42:25,712 We've taken every reasonable step to end this crisis. 935 00:42:25,812 --> 00:42:28,314 Thursday, I spoke with President Putin on the phone 936 00:42:28,415 --> 00:42:29,349 for an hour. 937 00:42:29,449 --> 00:42:31,518 It did not go well. 938 00:42:31,618 --> 00:42:33,820 Everybody's talented, man. 939 00:42:33,920 --> 00:42:37,924 You're in this institution because you're talented. 940 00:42:38,024 --> 00:42:41,194 So you just gotta find where your talent lays, 941 00:42:41,294 --> 00:42:42,729 and you gotta maximize it. 942 00:42:42,829 --> 00:42:45,732 So I got hired, and I wanted to be a performer 943 00:42:45,832 --> 00:42:47,667 because it's easier, and they said, "Write." 944 00:42:47,767 --> 00:42:50,136 I was like, "Aw, shit. I don't know how to write." 945 00:42:50,236 --> 00:42:53,039 I was writing like 13-page sketches with nine sets. 946 00:42:53,139 --> 00:42:55,041 Everyone's like, "What the fuck are you doing?" 947 00:42:55,141 --> 00:42:58,111 "I don't know what I'm doing! That's what I'm saying." 948 00:42:58,211 --> 00:43:00,613 In, people that recognize me from this show, 949 00:43:00,714 --> 00:43:02,048 even though I've been on twice. 950 00:43:02,148 --> 00:43:04,551 Out, people that think I'm Dana Carvey. 951 00:43:04,651 --> 00:43:08,688 After my first year, I actually called for a meeting with Lorne. 952 00:43:08,788 --> 00:43:11,024 I was like, "Please fire me." He was like, "Why?" 953 00:43:11,124 --> 00:43:14,527 I was like, "I don't belong here. Everybody here's so talented 954 00:43:14,627 --> 00:43:16,262 and they don't wanna be my friend." 955 00:43:16,363 --> 00:43:19,099 I was a child. I was like, "Nobody wants to be my friend." 956 00:43:19,199 --> 00:43:22,936 He said, "You don't figure it out until your third or fourth year." 957 00:43:23,036 --> 00:43:24,971 I was like, "What?" He was like, "Yeah, 958 00:43:25,071 --> 00:43:27,607 it's just gonna suck for like three or four years." 959 00:43:27,707 --> 00:43:29,476 I was like, "All right," and he was right. 960 00:43:30,310 --> 00:43:34,047 It's a lot of pressure. Even though we have writers, 961 00:43:34,147 --> 00:43:36,516 that doesn't necessarily mean they have to write for you. 962 00:43:36,616 --> 00:43:38,718 If it was left up to the writers, 963 00:43:38,818 --> 00:43:40,954 you might not see a lot of people. 964 00:43:41,054 --> 00:43:43,757 And, you know, I was never cast much. 965 00:43:43,857 --> 00:43:46,826 So I knew it was gonna be up to me, 966 00:43:46,926 --> 00:43:49,162 and I did co-write most of my stuff. 967 00:43:49,262 --> 00:43:52,065 Because characters come from you anyway. 968 00:43:52,165 --> 00:43:54,668 You just have to keep creating for yourself, 969 00:43:54,768 --> 00:43:57,070 like when Will and I did the cheerleaders. 970 00:43:57,170 --> 00:43:59,773 Break it down now! Mm, pshh, mm-mm, pshh, mm-mm. 971 00:43:59,873 --> 00:44:02,842 Spartan fever! Mm, pshh, mm-mm, pshh, mm. 972 00:44:02,942 --> 00:44:05,812 Takin' off! Mm, pshh, mm-mm, pshh, mm-mm. 973 00:44:05,912 --> 00:44:09,149 Fever's risin'. Mm, pshh, mm-mm, pshh, mm. 974 00:44:09,249 --> 00:44:10,150 Time to cough! 975 00:44:11,785 --> 00:44:13,953 We had to do those cheers correctly. 976 00:44:14,054 --> 00:44:16,723 And I'm like, "Could I have made this any harder?" 977 00:44:16,823 --> 00:44:18,625 He picked things up easy. 978 00:44:18,725 --> 00:44:20,660 I didn't as much. 979 00:44:20,760 --> 00:44:23,997 We're on a caffeine high, so hold on tight, 980 00:44:24,097 --> 00:44:26,966 live from New York, it's Saturday Night! 981 00:44:27,067 --> 00:44:29,069 That was a big deal to say, "Live from New York." 982 00:44:29,169 --> 00:44:31,504 I think that was the only time I said it. 983 00:44:32,138 --> 00:44:36,076 The schedule is so grueling. 984 00:44:36,176 --> 00:44:38,445 You're working on weekends, working all night. 985 00:44:38,545 --> 00:44:42,015 - It's like a comedy emergency room. - Wake up! 986 00:44:42,115 --> 00:44:44,284 If you've ever been in an emergency room, 987 00:44:44,384 --> 00:44:47,787 people are so good at their jobs that people don't run around 988 00:44:47,887 --> 00:44:50,123 and scream and yell when something's going down. 989 00:44:50,223 --> 00:44:52,659 They get really quiet, and they do their job. 990 00:44:52,759 --> 00:44:57,263 But emergency rooms are hectic, and they're filled with risk-takers, 991 00:44:57,364 --> 00:45:02,469 and there's some trauma involved, and stress, and high stakes. 992 00:45:02,569 --> 00:45:06,639 It's hard, man. It's a tough place to work. Like, no bullshit. 993 00:45:06,740 --> 00:45:10,977 It owes you nothing, and yet it's designed to be fun. It's made to be fun. 994 00:45:11,077 --> 00:45:13,179 -There are so many people I need to thank tonight. -Sorry. 995 00:45:13,279 --> 00:45:16,950 Can maybe everybody, when he comes out, stand and clap? 996 00:45:17,050 --> 00:45:19,419 It's pure chaos. The show is pure chaos. 997 00:45:19,519 --> 00:45:23,023 But the magic is keeping it chaotic, so you can't overthink things. 998 00:45:23,123 --> 00:45:25,792 Here to comment is Boy George. 999 00:45:28,261 --> 00:45:30,830 To get the job, you have to be all these things, 1000 00:45:30,930 --> 00:45:32,165 a great writer, a great performer, 1001 00:45:32,265 --> 00:45:34,200 know how to use your body on stage, 1002 00:45:34,300 --> 00:45:36,369 not be too big for the people at home 1003 00:45:36,469 --> 00:45:39,272 but not be too small for the people in the audience. 1004 00:45:39,372 --> 00:45:41,541 That sounds all right to me, doesn't it? 1005 00:45:41,641 --> 00:45:45,512 But the key, right, the key to be successful on the show-- 1006 00:45:45,612 --> 00:45:48,014 can you be your authentic self? 1007 00:45:51,317 --> 00:45:53,353 - We, uh, rolling here? - Yeah. 1008 00:45:53,453 --> 00:45:54,454 -Yep? -Go ahead, Dan. 1009 00:45:54,554 --> 00:45:56,890 Okay. Deltoid Spray is made 1010 00:45:56,990 --> 00:45:58,625 from the extracted liquid 1011 00:45:58,725 --> 00:46:00,927 from the spleens of perfumed sheep. 1012 00:46:01,027 --> 00:46:04,831 In show business, I've had a fairly limited career. 1013 00:46:04,931 --> 00:46:07,367 It's hard to perform on stage in a wheelchair. 1014 00:46:07,467 --> 00:46:12,439 Hi. My name is Sherry, and I was made to fly. 1015 00:46:12,539 --> 00:46:14,407 God, it's so bitchin'. 1016 00:46:14,507 --> 00:46:16,710 The thing about new people coming in 1017 00:46:16,810 --> 00:46:19,279 is everyone's really excited about this thing 1018 00:46:19,379 --> 00:46:21,381 that this person can do that we didn't have before. 1019 00:46:21,481 --> 00:46:23,550 That carries the day more than anything else. 1020 00:46:23,650 --> 00:46:27,587 -...call from the chairman. Chairman Kim. -Whassup? 1021 00:46:27,687 --> 00:46:30,924 Or the fact that there hadn't been an East Asian person 1022 00:46:31,024 --> 00:46:34,627 who couldn't pass as anything else be on camera here. 1023 00:46:34,728 --> 00:46:36,429 That scared the shit out of me. 1024 00:46:36,529 --> 00:46:39,399 But I think that attitude served me well coming in 1025 00:46:39,499 --> 00:46:42,035 'cause I'm like, "I'm never gonna get this, 1026 00:46:42,135 --> 00:46:45,505 so fuck it, I'm just gonna, like, do what I want." 1027 00:46:46,006 --> 00:46:47,741 Wow. 1028 00:46:47,841 --> 00:46:51,077 Oh, Glorious Leader says, "Very impressive," 1029 00:46:51,177 --> 00:46:52,846 but in a sarcastic way. 1030 00:46:52,946 --> 00:46:55,448 I think that's the right thing to come in here with 1031 00:46:55,548 --> 00:46:59,219 is just to feel some, like, liberated sense of, 1032 00:46:59,319 --> 00:47:02,589 "This is who I am. Take it-- Literally take it or leave it." 1033 00:47:02,689 --> 00:47:06,760 First of all, you came to where I live, and you hit me. 1034 00:47:07,293 --> 00:47:09,295 My point of view will be maybe like 1035 00:47:09,396 --> 00:47:11,331 that of an Asian person or a queer person, 1036 00:47:11,431 --> 00:47:14,134 but also there are just as many things outside of that 1037 00:47:14,234 --> 00:47:16,603 that have nothing to do with those things. 1038 00:47:16,703 --> 00:47:19,506 There would be conversations I would have with writers 1039 00:47:19,606 --> 00:47:24,511 who I felt like were maybe pigeonholing certain things about me. 1040 00:47:24,611 --> 00:47:29,449 Thankfully that was never met with any toxicity or pushback. It was always, 1041 00:47:29,549 --> 00:47:32,886 "Thank you for telling me. I'm sorry that happened. It won't happen again." 1042 00:47:33,887 --> 00:47:36,122 What I think has been a nice turning point 1043 00:47:36,222 --> 00:47:39,259 is being able to joke about those things in a meta way. 1044 00:47:39,359 --> 00:47:41,661 I'd really like to see you again. 1045 00:47:41,761 --> 00:47:44,798 Oh, uh, yeah, I have a lot going on. 1046 00:47:45,298 --> 00:47:47,467 -Right. Totally. -Plus, I gotta... 1047 00:47:47,567 --> 00:47:50,136 keep up appearances with the whole gay thing. 1048 00:47:50,236 --> 00:47:51,871 It's sort of my meal ticket. 1049 00:47:51,971 --> 00:47:55,809 That's been the nice 360, full circle thing on it 1050 00:47:55,909 --> 00:47:58,845 where, after an earned amount of time, 1051 00:47:58,945 --> 00:48:02,482 I've been able to sort of expand that scope a bit. 1052 00:48:02,582 --> 00:48:04,117 I was excited. 1053 00:48:04,217 --> 00:48:07,620 I wanted to show them my world, how funny it was, 1054 00:48:07,721 --> 00:48:12,792 but the first three years, I felt like I was being culturally isolated sometimes. 1055 00:48:12,892 --> 00:48:14,627 I'm coming from a world of Black. 1056 00:48:14,728 --> 00:48:16,363 I'm a inner city kid... 1057 00:48:16,463 --> 00:48:18,998 to be... like the whitest show in America. 1058 00:48:19,099 --> 00:48:22,135 Sometimes I still don't even get recognized in my own neighborhood. 1059 00:48:22,235 --> 00:48:26,106 But that's all right, because I'm the other Black guy. 1060 00:48:26,206 --> 00:48:30,010 I felt by myself. I felt, you know, they wasn't getting it. 1061 00:48:30,110 --> 00:48:32,045 But then Lorne Michaels had that talk with me, 1062 00:48:32,145 --> 00:48:36,683 and he said, "Tracy, I hired you because you're funny. 1063 00:48:37,484 --> 00:48:40,754 Not because you're Black. Do your thing." 1064 00:48:41,421 --> 00:48:43,556 And that's when I started doing my thing. 1065 00:48:43,656 --> 00:48:48,061 And now I shall read some of my Hallmark cards. 1066 00:48:48,695 --> 00:48:51,097 I will begin with this one here. 1067 00:48:52,098 --> 00:48:53,733 It's my favorite. 1068 00:48:54,668 --> 00:48:57,103 "I lay down in my grave 1069 00:48:57,203 --> 00:48:59,739 and watch my children grow, 1070 00:48:59,839 --> 00:49:03,076 proud blooms above the weeds of death. 1071 00:49:03,176 --> 00:49:05,912 I lay down in my grave. 1072 00:49:06,012 --> 00:49:08,782 My grave. To die. 1073 00:49:09,382 --> 00:49:12,952 Happy fifth birthday, grandson." 1074 00:49:13,053 --> 00:49:14,854 * Brian Fellow's, Brian Fellow's... * 1075 00:49:14,954 --> 00:49:17,757 * Brian Fellow's Safari Planet * 1076 00:49:17,857 --> 00:49:21,027 I bet if this goat could talk, he would say things like 1077 00:49:21,127 --> 00:49:23,963 curse words, and call people doo-doo head, 1078 00:49:24,064 --> 00:49:25,465 and sing naughty songs. 1079 00:49:25,565 --> 00:49:27,100 He's weird! 1080 00:49:29,169 --> 00:49:30,970 Well, it's a she. 1081 00:49:31,071 --> 00:49:32,906 I'm Brian Fellow! 1082 00:49:33,006 --> 00:49:34,641 The first time I auditioned, 1083 00:49:34,741 --> 00:49:37,577 I had heard that they were looking for a White guy. 1084 00:49:37,677 --> 00:49:40,914 I'm not White or a guy. Spoiler. 1085 00:49:41,014 --> 00:49:43,249 I gotta cut you a piece of this steak. 1086 00:49:43,350 --> 00:49:45,418 This steak is bussing. 1087 00:49:46,920 --> 00:49:48,688 Oh my God. Can you just chill? 1088 00:49:48,788 --> 00:49:50,323 He's trying to tell a story. 1089 00:49:50,423 --> 00:49:52,592 -Girl, I heard the man. -Oh my God. 1090 00:49:52,692 --> 00:49:57,163 I felt like I could do the job in the way 1091 00:49:57,263 --> 00:49:59,666 that would make it easier for the next Black woman. 1092 00:49:59,766 --> 00:50:02,302 And I say this not to say that every day I'd go in thinking, 1093 00:50:02,402 --> 00:50:04,504 "This is for Black women." I wasn't. 1094 00:50:04,604 --> 00:50:07,640 I wanted the audience to have a point of reference 1095 00:50:07,741 --> 00:50:11,678 of a Black woman they felt like had the skill set to do the job, 1096 00:50:11,778 --> 00:50:14,781 and thus their brains could go, "Okay, yeah, she belongs," 1097 00:50:14,881 --> 00:50:17,250 and then the next Black woman who comes after me, 1098 00:50:17,350 --> 00:50:21,054 my hope is her time was, like, five percent easier 1099 00:50:21,154 --> 00:50:23,056 because of the work I did there. 1100 00:50:23,156 --> 00:50:26,192 And my time was bounds easier because of the work 1101 00:50:26,292 --> 00:50:27,660 of the women who came before me, 1102 00:50:27,761 --> 00:50:29,996 including Leslie Jones, Sasheer Zamata, 1103 00:50:30,096 --> 00:50:32,665 Danitra Vance, Ellen Cleghorne, Maya Rudolph. 1104 00:50:32,766 --> 00:50:35,635 Now, I'd like to hear the vice president's response, 1105 00:50:35,735 --> 00:50:37,137 and while he speaks, 1106 00:50:37,237 --> 00:50:39,906 I'm gonna smile at him like I'm in a T.J. Maxx 1107 00:50:40,006 --> 00:50:43,243 and a White lady asked me if I work here. 1108 00:50:44,144 --> 00:50:46,513 Look, I promise you, 1109 00:50:46,613 --> 00:50:49,582 the president has taken this virus seriously 1110 00:50:49,683 --> 00:50:52,686 since the very beginning of last week. 1111 00:50:53,820 --> 00:50:56,990 There's a million different ways to be funny. 1112 00:50:57,657 --> 00:51:00,927 I love people that have zero point of view 1113 00:51:01,027 --> 00:51:02,729 or have zero depth. 1114 00:51:02,829 --> 00:51:06,633 I love people that are incredibly deep and smart 1115 00:51:06,733 --> 00:51:10,370 and wanna tell me like what their version of the world is. 1116 00:51:10,470 --> 00:51:12,706 That's why I love comedy so much. 1117 00:51:12,806 --> 00:51:17,010 I think it can be hugely varied as to what you laugh at, 1118 00:51:17,110 --> 00:51:19,512 and what we laugh at is super personal. 1119 00:51:19,612 --> 00:51:21,181 Funny is funny. 1120 00:51:21,281 --> 00:51:24,150 If it's funny for you, know that it's funny. 1121 00:51:24,250 --> 00:51:26,753 If they laugh, it's just an appreciation 1122 00:51:26,853 --> 00:51:28,421 of your sense of humor. 1123 00:51:28,521 --> 00:51:30,590 Not everybody's gonna appreciate it. 1124 00:51:30,690 --> 00:51:33,026 If you let the other stuff get in your head, 1125 00:51:33,126 --> 00:51:34,561 you gonna blow it. 1126 00:51:35,295 --> 00:51:37,530 The one thing I've gotten used to 1127 00:51:37,630 --> 00:51:40,433 is swings in momentum all the time 1128 00:51:40,533 --> 00:51:43,737 and the roller-coaster of feeling 1129 00:51:43,837 --> 00:51:45,572 so successful at something 1130 00:51:45,672 --> 00:51:48,541 and then almost an immediate heartbreak. 1131 00:51:48,641 --> 00:51:51,344 Honestly, the note from Lorne and the producers 1132 00:51:51,444 --> 00:51:56,516 from the day you step foot in there is, "Have fun," 1133 00:51:56,616 --> 00:51:59,953 but, you know, most of us were all SNL fans 1134 00:52:00,053 --> 00:52:01,755 from the time we were little, 1135 00:52:01,855 --> 00:52:04,791 and you're like, "I'm in a serious spot right now. 1136 00:52:04,891 --> 00:52:06,326 I am in the place." 1137 00:52:06,426 --> 00:52:10,897 Okay, so, Shape of Water was like... 1138 00:52:10,997 --> 00:52:11,998 I don't know. 1139 00:52:12,098 --> 00:52:14,334 It was like weird. 1140 00:52:16,036 --> 00:52:17,737 But when you can just let go of that, 1141 00:52:17,837 --> 00:52:19,939 know that all the people you're working with 1142 00:52:20,040 --> 00:52:23,376 and working for, they do just want you to enjoy yourself, 1143 00:52:23,476 --> 00:52:26,913 and you're like, "I can do this. I can be on SNL." 1144 00:52:29,416 --> 00:52:32,952 It is so important for me to be the prettiest. 1145 00:52:33,053 --> 00:52:35,255 And I always am. Always. 1146 00:52:36,156 --> 00:52:39,592 And... I like to win. 1147 00:52:40,060 --> 00:52:42,862 And I hate to lose. 1148 00:52:42,962 --> 00:52:45,899 Believe me, I am a sore loser. 1149 00:52:46,599 --> 00:52:50,370 And if it doesn't look like I'm gonna win, 1150 00:52:51,538 --> 00:52:52,605 I cheat. 1151 00:52:53,540 --> 00:52:55,675 No. I do. I really do. 1152 00:52:58,845 --> 00:53:03,116 Calvin Klein cream pies. For girls you hate. 1153 00:53:06,219 --> 00:53:09,622 The feedback from an audience, the laughter, 1154 00:53:09,723 --> 00:53:11,124 it's like a drug. 1155 00:53:11,224 --> 00:53:13,360 You're having a shared experience 1156 00:53:13,460 --> 00:53:15,628 in that moment that's fleeting. 1157 00:53:15,729 --> 00:53:19,766 To have that exchange is amazing. 1158 00:53:19,866 --> 00:53:21,134 Mary Katherine-- 1159 00:53:21,234 --> 00:53:23,503 Mary Katherine Gallagher! 1160 00:53:24,738 --> 00:53:26,139 I slipped. 1161 00:53:26,239 --> 00:53:29,442 When I did, like, the first Mary Katherine Gallagher sketch, 1162 00:53:29,542 --> 00:53:33,980 I remember like coming on and just being so nervous. 1163 00:53:34,080 --> 00:53:36,249 My heart was pounding. 1164 00:53:36,349 --> 00:53:38,918 I was like, "I'm gonna use my real nervous energy 1165 00:53:39,019 --> 00:53:42,422 that I have as Molly Shannon and pour that into the character." 1166 00:53:42,522 --> 00:53:44,324 -Sometimes when I get nervous... -Yes. 1167 00:53:44,424 --> 00:53:48,595 I stick my hands under my arms then smell my fingers like that. 1168 00:53:49,429 --> 00:53:50,830 Oh, that's gross. 1169 00:53:50,930 --> 00:53:52,565 But I remember, when the sketch ended, 1170 00:53:52,665 --> 00:53:55,301 there was like a roar from the audience, 1171 00:53:55,402 --> 00:53:58,004 and I-I-- It's exhilarating. 1172 00:53:58,104 --> 00:54:00,607 There's nothing like it. It's the greatest feeling. 1173 00:54:00,707 --> 00:54:03,910 It's almost like I'm presenting to a group of people like, 1174 00:54:04,010 --> 00:54:08,348 "Hey, did you ever notice this, or do you feel the same way? Is it just me?" 1175 00:54:08,448 --> 00:54:13,253 Then when there's a reaction to that, I'm like, "Oh, okay. Now we're having a discussion." 1176 00:54:13,353 --> 00:54:15,288 It's like... the most fun. 1177 00:54:15,388 --> 00:54:17,691 When a sketch really crushes here, 1178 00:54:17,791 --> 00:54:19,859 it's-it's the greatest feeling. 1179 00:54:19,959 --> 00:54:23,063 The best sketch I have ever seen here, 1180 00:54:23,163 --> 00:54:25,031 that I was very lucky to be a part of, 1181 00:54:25,131 --> 00:54:27,334 was Farewell, Mr. Bunting. 1182 00:54:27,434 --> 00:54:29,502 Sit down! 1183 00:54:31,471 --> 00:54:33,106 As you all know, 1184 00:54:33,206 --> 00:54:37,243 Mr. Bunting will no longer be teaching here at Windermere. 1185 00:54:37,344 --> 00:54:40,747 His unorthodox methods have done enough damage. 1186 00:54:40,847 --> 00:54:44,351 That sketch was crazy, because during the table read, 1187 00:54:44,451 --> 00:54:46,753 there's no laughs. It's all stage direction 1188 00:54:46,853 --> 00:54:49,356 and like serious... serious acting. 1189 00:54:49,456 --> 00:54:52,025 And I was like, "Oh, I wonder how this is gonna go." 1190 00:54:53,426 --> 00:54:55,662 I sing my song for all to hear. 1191 00:54:55,762 --> 00:54:57,764 Sit down this instant! 1192 00:55:00,166 --> 00:55:02,335 I sing my song for all to hear. 1193 00:55:02,435 --> 00:55:06,606 I will have you both expelled if you do not sit down immediately! 1194 00:55:06,706 --> 00:55:09,609 -Mr. Bunting, please! -I sing my song for all to hear. 1195 00:55:09,709 --> 00:55:11,578 I sing my song for all to hear. 1196 00:55:16,449 --> 00:55:17,984 I sing my so-- 1197 00:55:25,291 --> 00:55:27,093 It was the loudest sound I ever heard. 1198 00:55:27,193 --> 00:55:30,663 People were standing up and going, "Doh," like cheering, 1199 00:55:30,764 --> 00:55:32,665 and we're all looking at each other-- 1200 00:55:32,766 --> 00:55:36,369 It was sick, dude. When it's live in here, 1201 00:55:36,469 --> 00:55:38,938 and everyone's having a good time, 1202 00:55:39,039 --> 00:55:40,840 it's hard to beat that. 1203 00:55:42,609 --> 00:55:44,544 I don't think you can be successful 1204 00:55:44,644 --> 00:55:46,813 without connecting with the audience. 1205 00:55:47,447 --> 00:55:49,482 I think comedy's very straightforward like that. 1206 00:55:49,916 --> 00:55:52,285 Now you can jump 30 feet in the air 1207 00:55:52,385 --> 00:55:56,156 while your feet are covered in sweet coco-dego-dogo-dogoses. 1208 00:55:57,524 --> 00:55:59,993 But that's not all. 1209 00:56:00,093 --> 00:56:01,494 What's the matter, Michael? 1210 00:56:02,529 --> 00:56:03,830 That's not all! 1211 00:56:03,930 --> 00:56:05,298 A lot of the times, 1212 00:56:05,398 --> 00:56:07,634 you'll see me like smirk after I say things 1213 00:56:07,734 --> 00:56:09,269 because that's funny. 1214 00:56:09,369 --> 00:56:11,571 That's where I think the funny is. 1215 00:56:11,671 --> 00:56:13,606 I'm also a human being in this moment, 1216 00:56:13,707 --> 00:56:15,875 so I heard it too, and I thought it was funny. 1217 00:56:15,975 --> 00:56:19,312 That reminds everybody that this is live, and I'm a live person, 1218 00:56:19,412 --> 00:56:22,816 and we're all in this moment, you know, a lot closer together. 1219 00:56:22,916 --> 00:56:24,951 - Samuel L. Jackson. - Man,! 1220 00:56:25,051 --> 00:56:26,686 Hey! 1221 00:56:26,786 --> 00:56:28,288 Also... 1222 00:56:28,655 --> 00:56:31,157 - Come on, Sam. - This some! 1223 00:56:31,257 --> 00:56:34,594 Come on now. That costs money. 1224 00:56:36,830 --> 00:56:39,165 I always look at the cast photos 1225 00:56:39,265 --> 00:56:41,901 and watch my maturation. 1226 00:56:42,802 --> 00:56:46,606 I'm very lucky to be able to have that kind of growth chart. 1227 00:56:53,513 --> 00:56:55,849 Easy. Easy. 1228 00:56:55,949 --> 00:56:58,818 A lot of people don't get a chance to reach their potential. 1229 00:56:58,918 --> 00:57:02,455 And the ones that do, I think, learn a valuable lesson here. 1230 00:57:02,555 --> 00:57:04,691 My humble shoes are always on 1231 00:57:04,791 --> 00:57:09,062 because I'm always aware it takes a lot to do the show. 1232 00:57:09,162 --> 00:57:11,564 A whole lot of people came through these doors 1233 00:57:11,664 --> 00:57:13,633 and put their blood, sweat, and tears 1234 00:57:13,733 --> 00:57:16,636 into creating this shit on a week-in, week-out basis. 1235 00:57:16,736 --> 00:57:19,873 To see it like kinda naked like this is wild. 1236 00:57:19,973 --> 00:57:21,875 You forget that it's just a studio. 1237 00:57:22,409 --> 00:57:24,144 So much shit has gone on in here. 1238 00:57:24,244 --> 00:57:25,712 Moet. Wow. 1239 00:57:25,812 --> 00:57:28,181 What are you celebrating, averageness? 1240 00:57:28,948 --> 00:57:29,816 No. 1241 00:57:29,916 --> 00:57:32,085 Ha. She's joking. She's joking. 1242 00:57:32,185 --> 00:57:34,254 Regine has a very refined palate 1243 00:57:34,354 --> 00:57:36,556 as well as a refined sense of humor. 1244 00:57:36,656 --> 00:57:39,192 Watch what happens when I tickle her behind her knee. 1245 00:57:39,292 --> 00:57:41,061 Gimme that. Come here. 1246 00:57:41,161 --> 00:57:43,263 -Come here, you. -Ah! 1247 00:57:43,363 --> 00:57:45,832 Yeah. Yeah. 1248 00:57:45,932 --> 00:57:49,235 It's live, and anything can happen at any point 1249 00:57:49,336 --> 00:57:51,237 from anyplace in any direction. 1250 00:57:51,338 --> 00:57:54,374 She's more than okay. No, her body is like a harp 1251 00:57:54,474 --> 00:57:56,643 that only I know how to play. 1252 00:57:56,743 --> 00:57:58,812 Her foot is in the guacamole. 1253 00:57:59,346 --> 00:58:01,915 Doesn't matter. Doesn't matter. Makes it better. 1254 00:58:05,051 --> 00:58:06,920 I'm fine with that. 1255 00:58:07,020 --> 00:58:08,488 Can-- 1256 00:58:09,989 --> 00:58:11,991 -Doesn't bother me. -We bring people to the show, 1257 00:58:12,092 --> 00:58:14,394 every time they come-- "That's the best show I'd seen," 1258 00:58:14,494 --> 00:58:16,429 'cause they're in the vibe of it. 1259 00:58:16,529 --> 00:58:18,932 So to be in that, and responsible for it-- 1260 00:58:19,032 --> 00:58:20,266 it's thrilling. 1261 00:58:20,367 --> 00:58:23,803 You know? Hour and a half. Let's see what happens. 1262 00:58:28,908 --> 00:58:31,711 I have a theory that there is a chemical, 1263 00:58:31,811 --> 00:58:34,948 like there's a DNA to the people who've ended up on the show. 1264 00:58:35,048 --> 00:58:37,450 I don't know what it is. In my head I'm like, 1265 00:58:37,550 --> 00:58:39,452 I wonder if there's something physical 1266 00:58:39,552 --> 00:58:42,022 in the way people's, like, vocal chords are. 1267 00:58:42,122 --> 00:58:45,792 Or something... something concrete that's like, 1268 00:58:45,892 --> 00:58:49,295 did you know every cast member was born at nine in the morning? 1269 00:58:49,396 --> 00:58:50,897 Whatever some weird thing is. 1270 00:58:50,997 --> 00:58:55,135 When I see older cast members from casts before me, 1271 00:58:55,235 --> 00:58:56,870 you're familiar with them. 1272 00:58:56,970 --> 00:58:58,738 Same thing goes with new cast members. 1273 00:58:58,838 --> 00:59:00,707 There's a little bit of a feeling of, 1274 00:59:00,807 --> 00:59:03,176 I know what you're going through 1275 00:59:03,276 --> 00:59:07,147 and what it's like to have to reinvent yourself every Monday. 1276 00:59:07,247 --> 00:59:08,982 When all else fails, 1277 00:59:09,082 --> 00:59:11,384 use your cell phone. Pretend you're having... 1278 00:59:11,484 --> 00:59:12,552 -Cell phone. -...a conversation, 1279 00:59:12,652 --> 00:59:13,853 and he'll leave you alone. 1280 00:59:13,953 --> 00:59:16,723 Give me your money. Give me your m-- 1281 00:59:19,893 --> 00:59:22,529 Hope you guys learned a little something, and remember, 1282 00:59:22,629 --> 00:59:25,198 no matter what the situation is, you fight back! 1283 00:59:25,298 --> 00:59:28,601 You know, when I look at this audition, I'm like, it's so weird, 1284 00:59:28,702 --> 00:59:31,671 but everything that I was a fan of 1285 00:59:31,771 --> 00:59:33,640 is what you see in the audition. 1286 00:59:33,740 --> 00:59:36,743 I've always loved watching comedy and music, 1287 00:59:36,843 --> 00:59:39,612 and then to be on the other side of it, of doing it, 1288 00:59:39,713 --> 00:59:41,414 it's a real dream come true. 1289 00:59:41,848 --> 00:59:43,750 I'm in love with that show. 1290 00:59:43,850 --> 00:59:45,251 I was a hairdresser. 1291 00:59:45,352 --> 00:59:48,655 I remember telling some clients I'm quitting the salon, 1292 00:59:48,755 --> 00:59:51,758 'cause all I wanted to do was perform. 1293 00:59:51,858 --> 00:59:54,828 And some of them were like, "No! Don't become the cliche," 1294 00:59:54,928 --> 00:59:58,631 like, "You moved to LA to do hair, and you're doing it. 1295 00:59:58,732 --> 01:00:01,568 Like, this is bad. Don't do it." 1296 01:00:01,668 --> 01:00:05,271 But I had a lot of people that believed in me, 1297 01:00:05,372 --> 01:00:08,742 so I think they lifted me up onto a stage and made me perform 1298 01:00:08,842 --> 01:00:10,744 and now I'm like, "Okay, I'm doing it." 1299 01:00:10,844 --> 01:00:14,481 This is an older woman at a wedding 1300 01:00:14,581 --> 01:00:16,983 who doesn't wanna dance. 1301 01:00:17,083 --> 01:00:20,854 * I'm always ready to party, yeah, yeah * 1302 01:00:20,954 --> 01:00:24,691 * No, I don't listen to Mommy, yeah, yeah * 1303 01:00:24,791 --> 01:00:27,827 * And I'll never say that I'm sorry * 1304 01:00:27,927 --> 01:00:30,997 -* I am an American girl * -Stop. 1305 01:00:31,097 --> 01:00:33,500 -Stop. -* Hot blooded and I'm ready * 1306 01:00:33,600 --> 01:00:37,003 * To go, I'm lovin' taking over * 1307 01:00:37,103 --> 01:00:39,572 Stop. I'm serious, 'cause I don't wanna dance. 1308 01:00:39,673 --> 01:00:41,408 * Hot blooded, all-American girl * 1309 01:00:41,508 --> 01:00:43,710 I'm dancing right now, just-- 1310 01:00:44,110 --> 01:00:45,078 Stop. 1311 01:00:45,945 --> 01:00:49,115 * Every day is a... * 1312 01:00:49,549 --> 01:00:52,519 Oh my gosh. Did other people cry? 1313 01:00:52,619 --> 01:00:54,254 - Well, yes. - Okay. 1314 01:00:54,354 --> 01:00:56,289 Okay, good. 1315 01:00:57,223 --> 01:01:00,694 I just have never... I've never seen that at all. 1316 01:01:00,794 --> 01:01:03,129 And I didn't even think I could, 1317 01:01:03,229 --> 01:01:07,434 'cause I-I was a little scared that-that... 1318 01:01:09,436 --> 01:01:14,507 ...that I would just be a little too, like, critical or... 1319 01:01:14,607 --> 01:01:18,745 You know, and there are things I think I could have done better, but... 1320 01:01:18,845 --> 01:01:23,316 um... I, like, cannot believe I did that. 1321 01:01:23,416 --> 01:01:26,252 Just as far as, like, that's a lot of pressure. 1322 01:01:26,353 --> 01:01:28,355 Yeah. 1323 01:01:29,322 --> 01:01:30,690 Yeah. 1324 01:01:30,790 --> 01:01:32,325 This is a really tough job. 1325 01:01:32,425 --> 01:01:35,061 You go through all the emotions with these people. 1326 01:01:35,161 --> 01:01:37,931 But you all love each other at the end of the day. 1327 01:01:38,031 --> 01:01:40,900 So, uh, this is a really difficult place to leave, 1328 01:01:41,001 --> 01:01:43,470 but you don't ever really, truly leave. 1329 01:01:43,570 --> 01:01:45,205 I'm not good at sex, you know, 1330 01:01:45,305 --> 01:01:47,907 'cause I wasn't raised in a brothel. I'm 20. 1331 01:01:48,008 --> 01:01:50,744 Like I don't-- I'm not good at it, um... 1332 01:01:50,844 --> 01:01:52,812 I don't understand why my girlfriend gets mad. 1333 01:01:52,912 --> 01:01:55,415 She's like, "That's it?" I'm like, "What did you expect? 1334 01:01:55,515 --> 01:01:58,585 You know any good guitar players that have been playing guitar 1335 01:01:58,685 --> 01:02:00,253 for a year?" 1336 01:02:01,521 --> 01:02:03,323 I grew up here. 1337 01:02:04,491 --> 01:02:06,960 I was like a kid when I came in. 1338 01:02:07,060 --> 01:02:10,764 And I'll always be proud. I'll always be grateful. 1339 01:02:10,864 --> 01:02:13,733 And I'll always miss it. 1340 01:02:13,833 --> 01:02:16,369 Someday when I grow up, no matter what happens, 1341 01:02:16,469 --> 01:02:19,673 I'll say, "You know I was at that Saturday Night audition, 1342 01:02:19,773 --> 01:02:21,775 and that's nice, I appreciate that." 1343 01:02:21,875 --> 01:02:24,044 Everything that I do 1344 01:02:24,144 --> 01:02:27,414 I owe to Saturday Night Live. Everything. 1345 01:02:27,514 --> 01:02:30,617 And especially when I had Eddie Murphy next to me, man. 1346 01:02:30,717 --> 01:02:33,520 It was a joy you can't put into words. 1347 01:02:33,620 --> 01:02:36,322 My gratitude is immeasurable. 1348 01:02:36,423 --> 01:02:37,757 It really is. 1349 01:02:42,328 --> 01:02:44,964 I turned to Bella and I said, I go, "Bell, 1350 01:02:45,065 --> 01:02:47,000 you got more facial hair than he does." 1351 01:02:47,100 --> 01:02:49,502 She says, "You're bad!" Oh, we laughed up a storm 1352 01:02:49,602 --> 01:02:51,871 when I said that to her. Oh! 1353 01:02:51,971 --> 01:02:54,708 I remember on my audition just thinking, 1354 01:02:54,808 --> 01:02:56,843 "Wow, I'll be able to tell my grandchildren 1355 01:02:56,943 --> 01:02:58,978 I auditioned for Saturday Night Live." 1356 01:02:59,079 --> 01:03:01,348 Never, ever, ever dreaming that big. 1357 01:03:01,448 --> 01:03:05,919 Fidel Castro and I were roommates my freshman year in college. 1358 01:03:06,353 --> 01:03:08,254 And girlfriends, let me tell you, 1359 01:03:08,355 --> 01:03:11,024 he may be brilliant, he may be stubborn, 1360 01:03:11,124 --> 01:03:14,627 but what I remember most is that he had some funky BO. 1361 01:03:15,428 --> 01:03:18,598 I feel so fortunate to have gotten that chance 1362 01:03:18,698 --> 01:03:22,902 to have people enjoy it the way I enjoyed it when I watched it. 1363 01:03:23,003 --> 01:03:25,105 Believe me, it's not lost on me. 1364 01:03:25,205 --> 01:03:28,508 I'm still in awe that I was able to do that. 1365 01:03:29,309 --> 01:03:32,078 Uh, this is a bit I used to do with my friends 1366 01:03:32,178 --> 01:03:35,749 as a kid, but I still do it to this day when I'm driving. 1367 01:03:35,849 --> 01:03:38,284 Hey. Hi, uh, excuse me, I'm sorry. 1368 01:03:38,385 --> 01:03:40,787 Do you know how to get to Arbalato Drive? 1369 01:03:40,887 --> 01:03:44,290 No? Okay. What you're gonna wanna do is you're gonna wanna go straight 1370 01:03:44,391 --> 01:03:47,060 and you wanna take a left at the second light. 1371 01:03:47,694 --> 01:03:50,063 The night I got the show, 1372 01:03:50,163 --> 01:03:52,632 Seth Meyers said, "Congratulations. 1373 01:03:52,732 --> 01:03:56,503 You'll never talk about anything else for the rest of your life." 1374 01:03:59,839 --> 01:04:01,374 It's completely true. 1375 01:04:01,474 --> 01:04:04,444 It's the first thing that comes up at every dinner, every-- 1376 01:04:06,713 --> 01:04:08,915 It was-- It was everything. 1377 01:04:09,516 --> 01:04:10,917 And it still is. 1378 01:04:13,486 --> 01:04:16,489 Crazy. It's a lot. I loved that show. I was on it. 1379 01:04:19,826 --> 01:04:21,728 I also murdered someone this morning. 1380 01:04:21,828 --> 01:04:24,097 I feel terrible about it. 1381 01:04:24,197 --> 01:04:27,334 Before me, the only hippos in media were either Hungry Hungry 1382 01:04:27,434 --> 01:04:30,770 or Jada Pinkett Smith in Madagascar. 1383 01:04:30,870 --> 01:04:32,505 The first time I was in this room 1384 01:04:32,605 --> 01:04:34,374 was for an NBC studio tour. 1385 01:04:34,474 --> 01:04:36,776 It just felt, like, 1386 01:04:36,876 --> 01:04:39,079 electric just to be in the place. 1387 01:04:39,179 --> 01:04:42,949 Like even on the off-season, like the hum of the electricity, 1388 01:04:43,049 --> 01:04:45,752 it felt like so cool just to be here 1389 01:04:45,852 --> 01:04:48,121 and be told like what paint cans was 1390 01:04:48,221 --> 01:04:51,458 or be told that the props are all kept in that room. 1391 01:04:51,558 --> 01:04:53,226 And, like... 1392 01:04:53,326 --> 01:04:56,563 this was what, like, 20 years ago, basically. 1393 01:04:57,764 --> 01:04:59,833 It's nuts. It's nuts that I'm here. 1394 01:04:59,933 --> 01:05:03,036 And it feels like this... 1395 01:05:03,136 --> 01:05:06,072 fantastic thing that, like, 1396 01:05:06,172 --> 01:05:08,775 was never supposed to happen. 1397 01:05:08,875 --> 01:05:10,410 But I'm glad it did. 1398 01:05:10,510 --> 01:05:14,180 It all started just coming in here to audition. 1399 01:05:15,615 --> 01:05:18,084 Live, from New York... 1400 01:05:19,953 --> 01:05:21,921 And my name is Tracy Morgan. Thank you. 1401 01:05:22,022 --> 01:05:23,390 -Thank you. -Thank you. -Thank you. 1402 01:05:23,490 --> 01:05:25,992 -Thank you. -Thank you. -Thank you. 1403 01:05:26,092 --> 01:05:27,227 -Thanks a lot. -Thank you very much. 1404 01:05:27,327 --> 01:05:28,962 -Thank you. -Thank you so much. 1405 01:05:29,062 --> 01:05:30,663 -Thank you so much. -See y'all next week. 1406 01:05:30,764 --> 01:05:31,798 -Thank you. -Thank you. 1407 01:05:31,898 --> 01:05:33,833 That's it. Thank you, guys. 1408 01:05:33,933 --> 01:05:36,269 Have a good one.