"The Twilight Zone" The Last Rites of Jeff Myrtlebank

1 00:00:10,777 --> 00:00:13,279 你马上要踏进异次元 2 00:00:13,314 --> 00:00:16,399 一个光怪陆离，还发人深省的次元 3 00:00:16,434 --> 00:00:20,787 一场幻想世界的奇妙之旅 4 00:00:20,822 --> 00:00:23,907 下一站，奇幻地带 5 00:00:24,588 --> 00:00:27,289 -=THE LAST FANTASY=- 荣誉出品 本字幕仅供学习交流，严禁用于商业用途 6 00:00:27,701 --> 00:00:30,701 -=TLF字幕组=- 翻译&校对：诺阿诺阿 7 00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:38,074 Watch Online Movies and Series for FREE www.osdb.link/lm 8 00:00:51,818 --> 00:00:53,069 我没看见他啊 9 00:00:53,104 --> 00:00:56,189 他在布道坛前面的盒子里 10 00:00:56,224 --> 00:00:57,574 我以为他应该在棺材里 11 00:00:58,074 --> 00:00:58,691 你真傻 12 00:00:58,726 --> 00:01:01,194 我说的盒子就是棺材啊 13 00:01:11,454 --> 00:01:12,705 谢谢你，教友 14 00:01:15,208 --> 00:01:17,710 兄弟姐妹们，今天我们聚集在此 15 00:01:17,745 --> 00:01:20,096 悼念我们亲爱的兄弟 16 00:01:20,131 --> 00:01:23,850 杰弗逊·莫特班克 17 00:01:25,503 --> 00:01:29,222 我们都知道杰夫·莫特班克是好孩子 18 00:01:31,142 --> 00:01:32,358 他并不经常在礼拜日 19 00:01:32,393 --> 00:01:34,227 来主日学校学习 20 00:01:34,262 --> 00:01:36,112 但他也从没在周六晚上 21 00:01:36,147 --> 00:01:37,363 去非法酒吧鬼混 22 00:01:37,398 --> 00:01:38,615 阿门 23 00:01:38,650 --> 00:01:40,483 我们都将怀念这位 24 00:01:40,518 --> 00:01:41,484 优秀的年轻人 25 00:01:41,519 --> 00:01:44,369 伟大的主必是另有深意 26 00:01:44,404 --> 00:01:47,740 才带走如此年轻的他 27 00:01:47,775 --> 00:01:48,992 哈利路亚 28 00:01:49,027 --> 00:01:50,243 但是我们都知道 29 00:01:50,278 --> 00:01:52,745 主行事一向神秘 30 00:01:52,780 --> 00:01:54,631 今天… 31 00:02:14,052 --> 00:02:14,901 他还活着 32 00:02:27,530 --> 00:02:30,033 时间：20年代中期 33 00:02:30,068 --> 00:02:31,284 地点：中西部 34 00:02:31,319 --> 00:02:35,038 中西部的最南端 35 00:02:35,073 --> 00:02:36,923 我们刚目睹了一场葬礼 36 00:02:36,958 --> 00:02:40,677 一场由于奇幻地带的特殊影响 37 00:02:40,712 --> 00:02:44,430 而偏离原计划的葬礼 38 00:02:47,322 --> 00:02:50,722 「奇异世纪」第三季 第二十三集 「葬礼之后」 39 00:03:03,049 --> 00:03:06,169 是哪个天杀的把我放进棺材的？ 40 00:03:08,805 --> 00:03:11,307 兄弟姐妹们，不要惊慌 41 00:03:11,342 --> 00:03:14,427 看来出了一点小差错 42 00:03:14,462 --> 00:03:16,312 西登斯兄弟，看来 43 00:03:16,347 --> 00:03:18,181 你还有点理智 44 00:03:18,216 --> 00:03:20,683 这到底怎么回事？ 45 00:03:20,718 --> 00:03:22,569 孩子，我们正准备安葬你 46 00:03:22,604 --> 00:03:23,820 安葬我？ 47 00:03:23,855 --> 00:03:25,688 前天的时候 48 00:03:26,322 --> 00:03:27,690 我们已经确定你死了 49 00:03:27,725 --> 00:03:29,576 死了？ 50 00:03:31,578 --> 00:03:32,946 真荒唐 51 00:03:32,981 --> 00:03:34,948 博尔顿医生宣布你已经死了 52 00:03:34,983 --> 00:03:36,199 没错啊，孩子 53 00:03:36,234 --> 00:03:38,701 两天前你的心就不跳了 54 00:03:38,736 --> 00:03:39,953 我当时就在床边 55 00:03:39,988 --> 00:03:42,338 那…那怎么可能 56 00:03:42,373 --> 00:03:44,841 我现在…还在呼吸啊 57 00:03:44,876 --> 00:03:47,961 前天你的心脏就不跳了 58 00:03:47,996 --> 00:03:49,212 你当时病了，孩子 59 00:03:49,247 --> 00:03:50,213 病得很重 60 00:03:50,248 --> 00:03:51,464 是我从医生涯里 61 00:03:51,499 --> 00:03:53,349 碰到最严重的 62 00:03:53,384 --> 00:03:55,218 流感病例 63 00:03:55,253 --> 00:03:58,605 他能活过上周三我已是惊讶万分了 64 00:03:58,640 --> 00:04:00,607 我无意让你的从医生涯蒙上阴影，医生 65 00:04:00,642 --> 00:04:03,109 不过我不会因为保全你的脸面 66 00:04:03,144 --> 00:04:04,978 再爬回棺材里了 67 00:04:05,013 --> 00:04:05,862 没错 68 00:04:05,897 --> 00:04:07,730 这是自然 69 00:04:07,765 --> 00:04:08,982 当时真没脉搏了 70 00:04:09,017 --> 00:04:12,118 还好你没有给我涂防腐剂 71 00:04:13,620 --> 00:04:16,372 你感觉如何，孩子？ 72 00:04:16,407 --> 00:04:18,241 感觉很好 73 00:04:18,276 --> 00:04:21,995 有点虚弱，不过…精力充沛 74 00:04:22,030 --> 00:04:23,129 很饿 75 00:04:23,164 --> 00:04:25,632 我能吃下一头牛 76 00:04:25,667 --> 00:04:26,883 我真的非常饿 77 00:04:26,918 --> 00:04:28,134 想来也是 78 00:04:28,169 --> 00:04:30,637 我知道你已经三天没吃东西了 79 00:04:32,005 --> 00:04:33,256 妈！ 80 00:04:33,291 --> 00:04:34,891 爸！ 81 00:04:34,926 --> 00:04:36,259 惊喜吧！ 82 00:04:39,512 --> 00:04:40,763 我猜 83 00:04:40,798 --> 00:04:43,266 你们准备了丰盛的晚餐吧 84 00:04:43,301 --> 00:04:44,517 怎么了？ 85 00:04:44,552 --> 00:04:45,768 你们怎么像 86 00:04:45,803 --> 00:04:48,271 见了鬼似的 87 00:04:48,306 --> 00:04:49,522 你好啊，儿子 88 00:04:51,908 --> 00:04:53,776 看来我还真是讨人嫌啊 89 00:04:53,811 --> 00:04:56,279 自己的父母都害怕我 90 00:04:59,032 --> 00:05:00,283 康芙特 91 00:05:04,671 --> 00:05:06,289 你肯定不怕我吧 92 00:05:08,041 --> 00:05:09,926 我可是你的未婚夫啊 93 00:05:12,045 --> 00:05:15,181 看来我想错了 94 00:05:22,555 --> 00:05:25,058 莉斯？ 95 00:05:25,093 --> 00:05:26,693 你不会害怕我吧？ 96 00:05:38,454 --> 00:05:39,706 杰夫，他们都被你骗了 97 00:05:39,741 --> 00:05:40,957 对吧，杰夫？ 98 00:05:40,992 --> 00:05:42,825 没错，亲爱的，他们都被我骗了 99 00:05:44,577 --> 00:05:46,329 儿子 100 00:05:48,831 --> 00:05:50,083 儿子啊！ 101 00:05:50,118 --> 00:05:51,334 谢天谢地 102 00:05:51,369 --> 00:05:53,219 还好没有失去你，儿子 103 00:05:53,254 --> 00:05:54,470 我知道这是怎么回事 104 00:05:54,505 --> 00:05:56,339 我知道这是怎么回事 105 00:05:56,374 --> 00:06:00,727 这是发生在我们小县城的奇迹啊 106 00:06:00,762 --> 00:06:05,732 这个奇迹的术语叫做「生命暂停」 107 00:06:05,767 --> 00:06:07,734 非常罕见 108 00:06:07,769 --> 00:06:11,237 1500年来只有30例啊 109 00:06:11,272 --> 00:06:13,606 你这只是为了掩饰 110 00:06:13,641 --> 00:06:14,490 自己的失误吧？ 111 00:06:14,525 --> 00:06:16,993 我从没听过这等荒唐事 112 00:06:17,028 --> 00:06:18,494 你肯定没有听说过 113 00:06:18,529 --> 00:06:22,248 1500年来的30起全发生在欧洲 114 00:06:22,283 --> 00:06:24,117 别忙着诽谤我了 115 00:06:24,152 --> 00:06:27,003 赶紧带你儿子回家，给他做点吃的 116 00:06:27,038 --> 00:06:28,621 他需要好好休息 117 00:06:28,656 --> 00:06:30,506 我确实是有点虚弱 118 00:06:30,541 --> 00:06:33,009 我们现在就回家 119 00:06:33,044 --> 00:06:34,877 我来把车发动起来 120 00:06:34,912 --> 00:06:38,014 我给你烧只香喷喷的兔子吃 121 00:06:44,270 --> 00:06:48,024 抱歉我刚才那样子，杰夫 122 00:06:48,059 --> 00:06:52,395 只是…这太突然了 123 00:06:56,149 --> 00:06:59,285 我当然很开心你回到我们身边 124 00:06:59,320 --> 00:07:01,154 哦，谢谢你，你真好 125 00:07:01,788 --> 00:07:03,039 康芙特，亲爱的 126 00:07:03,074 --> 00:07:06,159 我一直都在你身边啊 127 00:07:12,999 --> 00:07:15,885 早餐很好吃，妈 128 00:07:15,920 --> 00:07:19,005 那我就去修补 129 00:07:19,040 --> 00:07:19,889 东边的篱笆了 130 00:07:19,924 --> 00:07:21,757 还是不要去了吧 131 00:07:21,792 --> 00:07:23,009 两周前你才 132 00:07:23,044 --> 00:07:26,145 刚刚死而复生啊 133 00:07:26,180 --> 00:07:27,396 你不应该从早到晚 134 00:07:27,431 --> 00:07:29,265 都辛苦干活 135 00:07:29,300 --> 00:07:30,516 我感觉很好，妈 136 00:07:30,551 --> 00:07:32,401 从没感觉这么好过 137 00:07:34,270 --> 00:07:36,155 我们一会儿见，爸 138 00:07:36,190 --> 00:07:38,024 好的 139 00:07:43,029 --> 00:07:45,531 我…我很担心 140 00:07:45,566 --> 00:07:47,416 他…他这两周 141 00:07:48,034 --> 00:07:51,787 都看起来怪怪的 142 00:07:51,822 --> 00:07:53,673 什么意思？ 143 00:07:53,708 --> 00:07:56,792 他变了，不像以前了 144 00:07:57,426 --> 00:08:00,046 我看着都差不多 145 00:08:00,081 --> 00:08:01,681 他只吃了两个蛋 146 00:08:01,716 --> 00:08:04,183 这说不通啊，自从长了牙 147 00:08:04,218 --> 00:08:06,052 他一直都是 148 00:08:06,087 --> 00:08:07,937 早餐吃三个蛋 149 00:08:07,972 --> 00:08:10,439 人的饭量是会变的嘛 150 00:08:10,474 --> 00:08:13,559 他还整日整夜 151 00:08:13,594 --> 00:08:14,810 摆弄各种东西 152 00:08:14,845 --> 00:08:17,313 还有他干活也卖力了 153 00:08:17,348 --> 00:08:21,067 不合理啊，他以前对干活都没什么兴趣 154 00:08:21,102 --> 00:08:23,069 这倒是真的 155 00:08:23,104 --> 00:08:24,954 以前看着他 156 00:08:24,989 --> 00:08:26,822 得过且过的样子 157 00:08:26,857 --> 00:08:28,708 我总是很担心 158 00:08:28,743 --> 00:08:31,077 也不能说是懒，但是… 159 00:08:31,112 --> 00:08:32,328 对 160 00:08:32,363 --> 00:08:33,829 不是懒，只是不感兴趣 161 00:08:33,864 --> 00:08:35,081 而且自从他病愈后 162 00:08:35,116 --> 00:08:37,583 就开始拼命工作 163 00:08:37,618 --> 00:08:39,468 就像是落后了一年似的 164 00:08:39,503 --> 00:08:41,337 这一点儿都不像他 165 00:08:41,372 --> 00:08:43,089 好了，大耳朵 166 00:08:43,124 --> 00:08:44,974 去信箱那里 167 00:08:45,009 --> 00:08:46,842 等邮差来 168 00:08:46,877 --> 00:08:48,728 我在等新的产品目录 169 00:08:48,763 --> 00:08:49,979 今天肯定就到了 170 00:08:50,014 --> 00:08:51,847 都等了好几天了 171 00:08:52,982 --> 00:08:54,850 女王驾到，速速避让！ 172 00:09:05,494 --> 00:09:07,363 邮差还没来呢 173 00:09:07,398 --> 00:09:09,615 能让我玩一下吗？ 174 00:09:09,650 --> 00:09:11,250 当然可以 175 00:09:13,119 --> 00:09:14,370 这是你的子弹 176 00:09:17,123 --> 00:09:19,008 我不害怕青蛙 177 00:09:19,043 --> 00:09:21,510 只不过青蛙脏兮兮的 178 00:09:22,762 --> 00:09:24,013 你哥哥怎么样了？ 179 00:09:24,048 --> 00:09:25,264 还好吧，我想 180 00:09:25,299 --> 00:09:27,767 只不过我爸妈很担心 181 00:09:28,384 --> 00:09:30,269 他最近的举动 182 00:09:30,304 --> 00:09:31,887 他怎么了？ 183 00:09:31,922 --> 00:09:35,024 我也不知道…就是不一样了 184 00:09:35,059 --> 00:09:38,144 吃的也不一样，干活也不一样 185 00:09:38,179 --> 00:09:40,396 老是摆弄各种东西 186 00:09:40,431 --> 00:09:43,149 再说了，这又不关你们的事 187 00:09:45,785 --> 00:09:47,653 他不爱我 188 00:09:47,688 --> 00:09:48,904 他爱我… 189 00:09:48,939 --> 00:09:50,790 是这样吗？ 190 00:09:51,407 --> 00:09:53,909 不知道你听说了没有 191 00:09:53,944 --> 00:09:57,046 其实呢，我听说了一些事 192 00:09:57,081 --> 00:09:58,914 我… 193 00:09:58,949 --> 00:10:00,166 等一下 194 00:10:00,201 --> 00:10:00,800 你，出去玩去 195 00:10:00,835 --> 00:10:03,302 不，我想听你说话 196 00:10:03,337 --> 00:10:05,171 快去，斯科特 197 00:10:05,206 --> 00:10:06,422 哦，真是的 198 00:10:06,457 --> 00:10:09,558 快去，要不然我罚你吃黑胡椒 199 00:10:15,181 --> 00:10:17,683 小人儿耳朵长的很 200 00:10:17,718 --> 00:10:19,568 好了，我知道 201 00:10:19,603 --> 00:10:22,688 他那可怜的爹妈都快吓死了 202 00:10:22,723 --> 00:10:25,191 为什么？因为自从葬礼之后 203 00:10:25,226 --> 00:10:27,076 他就像个陌生人似的 204 00:10:29,328 --> 00:10:30,579 是啊 205 00:10:30,614 --> 00:10:33,082 要是我家里有这么个孩子 206 00:10:33,117 --> 00:10:34,950 晚上绝对睡不好 207 00:10:34,985 --> 00:10:36,836 绝不会 208 00:10:36,871 --> 00:10:40,589 听说他爱摆弄各种东西，斧子什么的 209 00:10:40,624 --> 00:10:41,841 我也不知道 210 00:10:41,876 --> 00:10:44,343 他一直都是个好孩子 211 00:10:47,213 --> 00:10:47,847 嘿，大伙儿好啊 212 00:10:47,882 --> 00:10:49,715 你觉得呢，医生？ 213 00:10:49,750 --> 00:10:53,469 我们在说那个莫特班克家的孩子 214 00:10:53,504 --> 00:10:54,970 他怎么了？ 215 00:10:55,005 --> 00:10:56,222 就是比较好奇 216 00:10:56,257 --> 00:10:57,473 你最近也听说 217 00:10:58,107 --> 00:10:59,975 他行为怪异了吧 218 00:11:00,609 --> 00:11:01,861 是啊，听说了 219 00:11:01,896 --> 00:11:03,729 我不想太八卦 220 00:11:04,363 --> 00:11:06,365 可这事儿还是很奇怪啊 221 00:11:06,400 --> 00:11:08,234 他死了的那48个小时 222 00:11:08,269 --> 00:11:10,119 人在哪里呢？ 223 00:11:10,154 --> 00:11:11,370 肯定在某个地方 224 00:11:11,405 --> 00:11:13,239 假设他死了的话 225 00:11:13,274 --> 00:11:15,124 医生说他的病非常罕见 226 00:11:15,159 --> 00:11:17,992 也许只是善意的谎言，施特劳斯 227 00:11:18,027 --> 00:11:20,129 也许我说到他的病时 228 00:11:20,164 --> 00:11:21,997 考虑到他父母的感受 229 00:11:22,032 --> 00:11:23,883 你能说清楚点吗？ 230 00:11:23,918 --> 00:11:26,216 我不是那种还没确定病人死亡 231 00:11:26,218 --> 00:11:28,254 就敢让人下葬的庸医 232 00:11:28,289 --> 00:11:30,139 这点你比我清楚 233 00:11:30,174 --> 00:11:32,258 是啊，我们清楚，医生 234 00:11:36,145 --> 00:11:38,647 我不光把了他的脉 235 00:11:38,682 --> 00:11:41,016 他父母离开房间以后 236 00:11:41,051 --> 00:11:42,902 我给他做了针刺检查 237 00:11:44,153 --> 00:11:46,655 用针扎了他 238 00:11:47,273 --> 00:11:49,158 他连动都没动一下 239 00:11:51,026 --> 00:11:52,528 我把镜子放到他嘴边 240 00:11:52,563 --> 00:11:55,664 要是他还有一口气在 241 00:11:55,699 --> 00:11:57,533 他的呼吸会让镜子变模糊 242 00:11:57,568 --> 00:11:59,418 结果呢？ 243 00:11:59,453 --> 00:12:01,921 我后来不是宣布他死亡了吗？ 244 00:12:02,922 --> 00:12:05,424 那他那48个小时 245 00:12:05,459 --> 00:12:06,675 能去哪里呢？ 246 00:12:06,710 --> 00:12:07,927 我们来说说吧 247 00:12:07,962 --> 00:12:09,795 大家肯定都有想法 248 00:12:09,830 --> 00:12:11,680 你来说说，彼得斯 249 00:12:12,549 --> 00:12:14,800 我说就我说 250 00:12:14,835 --> 00:12:15,851 我们怎么知道 251 00:12:15,885 --> 00:12:17,937 棺材里爬出来的那人 252 00:12:17,972 --> 00:12:19,188 就是真的杰夫·莫特班克呢？ 253 00:12:19,223 --> 00:12:21,690 我就不会这么说，各位 254 00:12:21,725 --> 00:12:23,559 这么说会招来麻烦 255 00:12:23,594 --> 00:12:24,810 我也不知道 256 00:12:24,845 --> 00:12:27,313 我奶奶以前跟我说过 257 00:12:27,348 --> 00:12:30,449 恶鬼会在人世间游荡 258 00:12:30,484 --> 00:12:32,318 然后占据人的身体 259 00:12:32,952 --> 00:12:35,454 她说恶鬼有时会在人弥留之际 260 00:12:35,489 --> 00:12:37,323 附在人身上 261 00:12:37,358 --> 00:12:39,825 这种话可不能乱说，彼得斯 262 00:12:39,860 --> 00:12:42,962 不过必须承认在葬礼后说这种话 263 00:12:42,997 --> 00:12:45,464 简直就是给我的坏情绪 264 00:12:45,499 --> 00:12:46,715 火上浇油啊 265 00:12:51,086 --> 00:12:53,589 日安了各位 266 00:13:12,825 --> 00:13:15,578 是他 267 00:13:17,615 --> 00:13:21,951 真是的，康芙特，该跟他说清楚了 268 00:13:21,986 --> 00:13:23,202 就现在 269 00:13:23,237 --> 00:13:24,453 不 270 00:13:24,488 --> 00:13:25,704 我不对你指手画脚 271 00:13:25,739 --> 00:13:27,590 所以你也别管我 272 00:13:27,625 --> 00:13:30,092 奥格兰说的没错啊，亲爱的 273 00:13:30,127 --> 00:13:32,845 你知道县里的人都怎么说他 274 00:13:32,880 --> 00:13:34,213 他又不是去看全县人民 275 00:13:34,248 --> 00:13:35,464 他是来看我的 276 00:13:35,499 --> 00:13:37,466 你这个姑娘啊 277 00:13:37,501 --> 00:13:38,217 犟的跟驴一样 278 00:13:38,252 --> 00:13:40,719 我打赌你们俩生的孩子会长犄角 279 00:13:40,754 --> 00:13:41,971 奥格兰！ 280 00:13:42,006 --> 00:13:44,356 你们俩都进厨房去 281 00:13:44,391 --> 00:13:46,225 让我来招待客人就好了 282 00:13:55,734 --> 00:13:58,871 哦，老天保佑啊！ 283 00:13:58,906 --> 00:14:00,122 康芙特… 284 00:14:00,157 --> 00:14:01,373 看看谁来了 285 00:14:03,911 --> 00:14:05,127 快进来吧 286 00:14:08,747 --> 00:14:11,250 你妈妈和奥格兰还好吗？ 287 00:14:11,285 --> 00:14:11,884 挺好的 288 00:14:11,919 --> 00:14:13,135 你爸妈好吗？ 289 00:14:13,170 --> 00:14:14,386 还好，除了我妈 290 00:14:14,421 --> 00:14:15,638 她明天肯定会 291 00:14:15,673 --> 00:14:16,506 非常生气 292 00:14:16,541 --> 00:14:17,140 生气？ 293 00:14:17,757 --> 00:14:18,391 你看，我… 294 00:14:19,426 --> 00:14:21,894 我洗劫了她的宝贝玫瑰花 295 00:14:21,929 --> 00:14:24,396 这样就可以送花给你了 296 00:14:25,648 --> 00:14:27,516 哦，你不该这样做 297 00:14:27,551 --> 00:14:29,401 哦，这没什么啦 298 00:14:31,904 --> 00:14:33,772 都枯萎了，是吧？ 299 00:14:33,807 --> 00:14:35,024 可能家养的玫瑰 300 00:14:35,059 --> 00:14:36,909 花期比较短吧 301 00:14:36,944 --> 00:14:38,777 你什么时候摘的？ 302 00:14:38,812 --> 00:14:40,029 我来之前 303 00:14:40,064 --> 00:14:42,531 才摘的啊 304 00:14:42,566 --> 00:14:44,033 哦，好吧 305 00:14:47,169 --> 00:14:50,289 我们…来听听音乐吧？ 306 00:14:50,324 --> 00:14:51,540 好啊 307 00:14:51,575 --> 00:14:55,294 我们上周才新买了一张乡村蓝调唱片 308 00:14:55,329 --> 00:14:57,796 是啊，我看出来了 309 00:14:59,083 --> 00:15:01,550 别碰我 310 00:15:01,585 --> 00:15:02,801 怎么了？ 311 00:15:04,436 --> 00:15:06,305 对不起 312 00:15:06,340 --> 00:15:08,190 只是想到那些花都死了 313 00:15:09,942 --> 00:15:12,311 可能是因为你手上有毒 314 00:15:12,346 --> 00:15:14,697 我手上怎么会有毒呢？ 315 00:15:14,732 --> 00:15:17,566 这不是真正的原因 316 00:15:17,601 --> 00:15:19,568 不管我去哪里都是这样子 317 00:15:19,603 --> 00:15:22,705 只不过我没想到你也这样 318 00:15:22,740 --> 00:15:25,956 你们都像见了吸血鬼一样 319 00:15:25,991 --> 00:15:27,076 我真是受够了 320 00:15:27,111 --> 00:15:28,460 哦，杰夫 321 00:15:28,495 --> 00:15:31,080 你现在告诉我 322 00:15:31,115 --> 00:15:32,965 你是我的女孩吗？ 323 00:16:06,115 --> 00:16:08,500 天呐，孩子 324 00:16:08,535 --> 00:16:11,003 你怎么吓成这样？ 325 00:16:11,038 --> 00:16:12,254 他做什么了？ 326 00:16:12,289 --> 00:16:14,123 什么都没做 327 00:16:15,374 --> 00:16:16,625 这件事该结束了 328 00:16:17,259 --> 00:16:19,128 毕竟我是这个家里的男人 329 00:16:19,163 --> 00:16:20,379 他没做错任何事 330 00:16:20,414 --> 00:16:21,630 从三岁起 331 00:16:21,665 --> 00:16:24,133 我就不喜欢这家伙 332 00:16:24,168 --> 00:16:24,767 放开我 333 00:16:24,802 --> 00:16:26,635 奥格兰，你小心点 334 00:16:37,396 --> 00:16:38,647 杰夫？ 335 00:16:40,532 --> 00:16:41,784 你想怎样？ 336 00:16:41,819 --> 00:16:44,903 你以后不要再来我家了 337 00:16:44,938 --> 00:16:47,406 我来跟你说说清楚，奥格兰 338 00:16:47,441 --> 00:16:48,540 我现在很生气 339 00:16:48,575 --> 00:16:51,043 不只是生你的气 340 00:16:51,078 --> 00:16:53,545 但你要是还挡我的路 341 00:16:53,580 --> 00:16:55,414 我就要把气撒你身上了 342 00:16:55,449 --> 00:16:57,299 你威胁我吗？ 343 00:16:57,334 --> 00:16:57,916 是吗？ 344 00:16:58,550 --> 00:17:00,419 我看你小子忘了我是谁了 345 00:17:00,454 --> 00:17:03,055 要是我打你一下就能得到一毛钱 346 00:17:03,090 --> 00:17:04,923 我早都攒到百元大钞了 347 00:17:04,958 --> 00:17:07,176 是没错… 348 00:17:07,211 --> 00:17:09,678 可是你最近也没打我啊 349 00:17:11,930 --> 00:17:13,932 给我让开 350 00:17:17,319 --> 00:17:18,570 有种你来啊 351 00:17:52,471 --> 00:17:53,722 哦，宝贝啊 352 00:17:53,757 --> 00:17:55,607 可怜的宝贝 353 00:17:55,642 --> 00:17:57,006 快把咱家马车拉出来 354 00:17:57,061 --> 00:17:58,360 他把我下巴打骨折了 355 00:17:58,377 --> 00:18:00,229 我们现在就带你 356 00:18:00,264 --> 00:18:01,063 去找博尔顿医生 357 00:18:01,098 --> 00:18:02,614 可怜的杰夫 358 00:18:03,482 --> 00:18:05,367 他招谁惹谁了 359 00:18:05,402 --> 00:18:07,236 杰夫可怜？！ 360 00:18:11,623 --> 00:18:13,492 奥格兰，你下巴没有骨折 361 00:18:13,527 --> 00:18:15,994 要不然你不可能还说这么多话 362 00:18:16,029 --> 00:18:18,497 还是想办法治治你的头皮屑吧 363 00:18:18,532 --> 00:18:20,382 跟你们说，我非常确信 364 00:18:20,417 --> 00:18:24,136 我赤手空拳打了杰夫多少回了 365 00:18:24,171 --> 00:18:26,638 我能想起来的 366 00:18:26,673 --> 00:18:28,891 以前每天放学我都一路追他回家 367 00:18:28,926 --> 00:18:30,142 就像是每天的例行公事 368 00:18:30,177 --> 00:18:32,010 他从来都不是你的对手，奥格兰 369 00:18:32,045 --> 00:18:34,513 怎么今天你就被他揍了呢？ 370 00:18:34,548 --> 00:18:37,900 因为跟我打架的不是杰夫·莫特班克 371 00:18:37,935 --> 00:18:41,153 不管他是谁，都是在拳击场上练过的 372 00:18:41,188 --> 00:18:43,655 他出拳的方式 373 00:18:43,690 --> 00:18:46,024 跟咱们这儿的不一样 374 00:18:46,059 --> 00:18:51,029 这家伙非常危险，赤手空拳就能打死人 375 00:18:51,064 --> 00:18:53,532 这正是我害怕的啊，先生们 376 00:18:53,567 --> 00:18:54,166 有恶魔悄悄 377 00:18:54,201 --> 00:18:56,034 混到我们中间来了 378 00:18:56,069 --> 00:18:57,920 我们得想办法制止他 379 00:18:57,955 --> 00:18:59,788 大家都商量好要怎么做了 380 00:18:59,823 --> 00:19:01,673 我看没有理由 381 00:19:01,708 --> 00:19:04,176 再拖延下去了 382 00:19:04,211 --> 00:19:06,044 你们先说着 383 00:19:06,079 --> 00:19:08,547 我再来看看你这个下巴 384 00:19:33,822 --> 00:19:35,073 我赶过来警告你 385 00:19:35,108 --> 00:19:37,576 镇上有一群人正商量着 386 00:19:37,611 --> 00:19:40,078 要逼你离开这里呢 387 00:19:40,113 --> 00:19:44,082 那你怎么看，康芙特？ 388 00:19:44,117 --> 00:19:46,084 我是个善变的女人，杰夫 389 00:19:46,119 --> 00:19:47,970 我是那种人家说什么 390 00:19:48,005 --> 00:19:50,472 就信什么的人 391 00:19:50,507 --> 00:19:52,975 我听到人家说你坏话 392 00:19:53,010 --> 00:19:55,477 有时我又不够坚定 393 00:19:55,512 --> 00:19:57,346 没法避耳不听 394 00:19:57,381 --> 00:20:01,099 但在内心深处，我是爱你的啊 395 00:20:01,134 --> 00:20:04,853 否则我现在就不会在这儿了 396 00:20:05,487 --> 00:20:09,241 我非常非常爱你，康芙特 397 00:20:09,276 --> 00:20:11,109 我想让你嫁给我 398 00:20:18,367 --> 00:20:20,369 你最好现在就回答我 399 00:20:33,882 --> 00:20:35,133 各位 400 00:20:35,168 --> 00:20:36,385 你觉得呢？ 401 00:20:36,420 --> 00:20:38,270 杰夫，我们是作为委员会 402 00:20:38,305 --> 00:20:40,138 代表大家伙儿说话的 403 00:20:40,173 --> 00:20:41,390 我们讨论过了 404 00:20:41,425 --> 00:20:43,275 大家一致认为 405 00:20:43,310 --> 00:20:45,644 杰夫·莫特班克已经死了 406 00:20:45,679 --> 00:20:47,396 我们认为，你被鬼附身了 407 00:20:47,431 --> 00:20:48,397 没错，是被鬼附身了 408 00:20:48,432 --> 00:20:50,649 我们不知道你是谁，你从哪里来 409 00:20:50,684 --> 00:20:52,651 我们认为你偷了杰夫的身体 410 00:20:52,686 --> 00:20:54,536 我们不喜欢与你为邻 411 00:20:54,571 --> 00:20:56,405 所以要求你搬走 412 00:20:56,440 --> 00:20:57,656 搬走，听见了吗？ 413 00:20:57,691 --> 00:21:01,410 你觉得呢，杰夫？ 414 00:21:01,445 --> 00:21:03,912 这取决于康芙特·盖特伍德小姐 415 00:21:03,947 --> 00:21:08,300 我刚问了她一个问题，她还没有回答我 416 00:21:28,320 --> 00:21:30,822 我决定不管你去哪里，我都跟着你 417 00:21:30,857 --> 00:21:34,443 站在我后面 418 00:21:36,328 --> 00:21:38,580 先生们，我未婚妻和我 419 00:21:38,615 --> 00:21:41,700 都是在这里出生长大 420 00:21:41,735 --> 00:21:42,951 我们喜欢这里 421 00:21:42,986 --> 00:21:45,454 而且我们不打算在别处养育孩子 422 00:21:45,489 --> 00:21:46,088 你这是… 423 00:21:46,123 --> 00:21:47,339 等等！ 424 00:21:47,374 --> 00:21:48,590 我刚才让你说完了 425 00:21:48,625 --> 00:21:49,841 让他说完 426 00:21:49,876 --> 00:21:54,463 我们要留下来，你们将面临两种情况 427 00:21:54,498 --> 00:21:56,348 第一种是你们错了 428 00:21:56,383 --> 00:21:59,468 那就没什么好担心的 429 00:21:59,503 --> 00:22:00,719 因为这意味着 430 00:22:00,754 --> 00:22:02,604 我只是个名叫杰夫·莫特班克的 431 00:22:02,639 --> 00:22:05,223 乡下小子 432 00:22:05,258 --> 00:22:08,360 但要是你们说对了 433 00:22:08,395 --> 00:22:11,480 那你们最好对我好点 434 00:22:11,515 --> 00:22:14,616 因为你们不知道我会 435 00:22:14,651 --> 00:22:15,867 招来什么麻烦 436 00:22:15,902 --> 00:22:17,736 可能我右手一挥 437 00:22:17,771 --> 00:22:20,238 你们家玉米就遭了蝗灾 438 00:22:21,990 --> 00:22:24,876 可能我左手一挥，你们家水井就滴水不剩 439 00:22:24,911 --> 00:22:27,496 再或者我打个响指 440 00:22:28,130 --> 00:22:29,381 就烧毁一两个谷仓 441 00:22:29,416 --> 00:22:30,499 又或者哪天早上起来 442 00:22:30,534 --> 00:22:33,635 我心情不好 443 00:22:33,670 --> 00:22:36,755 就会让老鹰去偷你们家的鸡 444 00:22:38,006 --> 00:22:39,891 没错，各位 445 00:22:39,926 --> 00:22:43,512 你们最好对我和我未婚妻好点 446 00:22:43,547 --> 00:22:45,013 你要是娶了康芙特 447 00:22:45,048 --> 00:22:46,898 那就不一样了 448 00:22:46,933 --> 00:22:48,767 我们怎么会伤害她呢 449 00:22:48,802 --> 00:22:51,269 是啊，我们绝不会通过伤害她 450 00:22:51,304 --> 00:22:53,155 来报复别人的 451 00:22:53,190 --> 00:22:55,657 你打算何时娶她呢，杰夫？ 452 00:22:58,026 --> 00:22:59,277 很快吧，我想 453 00:22:59,312 --> 00:23:01,163 到时候通知我们哦，孩子 454 00:23:01,198 --> 00:23:02,414 我们要去野餐庆祝一番 455 00:23:02,449 --> 00:23:03,665 走吧，先生们 456 00:23:03,700 --> 00:23:06,785 他们俩还有话要说呢 457 00:23:22,934 --> 00:23:25,437 你不会那么做的，对吧？ 458 00:23:25,472 --> 00:23:26,688 当然不会 459 00:23:26,723 --> 00:23:27,939 我不想撒谎 460 00:23:27,974 --> 00:23:31,059 但是有的时候 461 00:23:31,094 --> 00:23:32,944 得想办法解决事情 462 00:23:32,979 --> 00:23:34,196 你是怎么做到的？ 463 00:23:34,231 --> 00:23:35,447 做什么？ 464 00:23:35,482 --> 00:23:37,315 点火柴啊 465 00:23:37,350 --> 00:23:39,818 你都没有在哪儿擦一下 466 00:23:39,853 --> 00:23:41,069 它就着了 467 00:23:41,104 --> 00:23:44,823 康芙特，亲爱的，你首先得明白 468 00:23:44,858 --> 00:23:47,325 不要随便想象 469 00:23:54,216 --> 00:23:56,718 杰夫和康芙特如今依然在世 470 00:23:56,753 --> 00:23:59,838 他们的独子是国家参议员 471 00:23:59,873 --> 00:24:03,592 以罕见的机智精明而闻名天下 472 00:24:03,627 --> 00:24:06,728 有人认为，他是在奇幻地带 473 00:24:06,763 --> 00:24:09,848 接受的教育 474 00:24:13,722 --> 00:24:15,022 罗德·瑟林，「奇异世纪」的编剧 475 00:24:15,033 --> 00:24:19,032 将在广告之后 476 00:24:19,101 --> 00:24:21,022 带来下集预告 477 00:24:22,023 --> 00:24:23,522 有请瑟林先生 478 00:24:24,623 --> 00:24:27,728 下周我们将带您深入库普兰 479 00:24:27,730 --> 00:24:31,784 直驱怪异之地的最中心 480 00:24:32,033 --> 00:24:34,389 下集为您带来戴蒙·耐特的原创 481 00:24:34,443 --> 00:24:36,040 「服务人类」 482 00:24:36,626 --> 00:24:38,107 不知道各位是否想过 483 00:24:38,300 --> 00:24:41,173 我们对「硬菜」的到来作何感想呢 484 00:24:41,189 --> 00:24:42,441 下周的剧集您一定会喜欢 485 00:24:43,135 --> 00:24:44,789 「服务人类」尽在奇幻地带 486 00:24:47,288 --> 00:24:57,090 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